Wild Spirit

by Emma Woodhouse (emma_woodhouse_2000@yahoo.com)

Rating: NC-17

Posted: 4 February, 2000

Summary: This is entirely AU, first-person Obi-Wan. Our hero is a young knight, sent to investigate a disturbance in the Force. As for Qui-Gon, well, my personal title for this story is Sweet Savage Qui-Gon...

Part I

As I stood behind the captain watching the planet grow larger in the viewscreen, I was surprised to feel anticipation. Though I'd tried to hide it at the Temple, I'd been frankly dismayed at the unimpressive nature of my first solo mission.

The Galaxy was full of hot spots, from outright war zones to deepening diplomatic crises, and as a new-minted knight I was looking forward to getting my feet wet in the maelstrom of galactic politics. Moreover, I wanted not just excitement, but opportunities to excel, to make a name for myself. Alright, to impress my former Master, in order to make my next declaration of love seem less callow.

"There she is, Sir Obi-Wan," the Captain said. "Caloon, the ass end of the galaxy. We'll be setting down in Janzel, the capital. Not much there, I'm afraid. Handful of merchants and the provincial government. The beer's watery, the food sucks, and all the whores are old enough to be your mother."

I nodded, exuding Jedi serenity. "Not that it matters," I told Captain Drel. "I won't be staying in the capital. My mission is taking me there." I pointed to the low mountains we were flying over. "Whatever's out there, if anything, is there. Or so they say."

Drel snorted. "Or so they say."

I was here chasing a myth, a ghost or demon or fairy or ogre, or perhaps a drunk's delusions. But the human residents of Caloon, especially those who inhabited the countryside, spoke of strange events, hovering rocks, odd weather, a wolf that displayed signs of intelligent action. The aboriginal inhabitants who predated the arrival of humans attributed it all to the Spirit Of the Mountain.

Silly, nebulous stuff, no doubt. But a visitor to Caloon, one who had a small but measurable ability to sense and manipulate the Force, reported to the Temple that he had felt strange movements in the Force while on the planet. It was enough to send an investigator, but not enough to justify a full-scale expedition. So one knight was assigned the task of performing a preliminary survey. If there turned out to be any truth to these legends, I was to notify the Order and await further instructions.

"We'd send at least a party of two," Master Mace Windu told me, "remote at the region is, on the very edge of the Republic. But the way things stand right now, we're just spread too thin. I'm sorry, Obi-Wan, but maybe the next assignment will have a bit more glamour."

So now I was being effusively welcomed at the rambling brick structure that gloried in the title of Governor's Mansion. Governor Shreef was a well-intentioned and marginally competent younger son of nobility, who made no secret of his desire for a more attractive assignment.

I was eager to get about my work, but schooled myself to patience and reminded myself to be polite and charming through the dinner that was thrown in my honor. The fact that a green Jedi Knight was considered a social catch told me much about the society on Caloon. Draydav, the Governor's discontented wife, gushed over me in what she fondly imagined was a Coruscant drawl. Several young ladies were presented to me, dressed in their best, eyes gleaming as they assessed my potential as their ticket out of here.

At the dinner table I was seated between one of these local belles and Colonel Wren, who was to be my guide tomorrow. I tried to discuss my mission with the Colonel to get a notion of what I would be facing, but courtesy dictated I give some attention to Jula on my right.

The young woman wanted to hear all about Coruscant and the Jedi. "It must be very grand," she said. "Not at all like this place."

I assessed the richly appointed dining room and turned back to my companion. "Actually, Miss Jula, this seems quite grand to me. I've lived my life in the Jedi Order and the Temple is quite plain. Large, of course, but little in the way of ornamentation. I fear you would be disappointed at our quarters and style of living."

She giggled in obvious disbelief and tossed her head coquettishly. "I swear, I would have to see it, sir. And perhaps the bachelor quarters are less well-appointed than those for families?"

She was obviously fishing for my marital status and I saw no point in hiding it. Bowing slightly, I admitted, "Yes, I am single, as are most Jedi."

Jula's eyes widened. "What? No families?"

"Oh, we Jedi do form attachments," I assured her. "Most often with other Jedi. Jedi couples will room together, of course, but the apartments provided are modest and most meals are taken in the general mess hall."

Jula turned back to her baked fish, a thoughtful look on her face. I could see that she was reassessing the notion of marrying into the Jedi community.

I turned back to Colonel Wren, who had been stoically shoveling food into his mouth with single-minded devotion. "We start early, Colonel?" I inquired politely.

He nodded. "Aye. You understand, I hope, that I've undertaken to take you TO the mountain? Just that? I'll help you set up and then I'm gone."

"So I understood," I told him. "I feel that one man being quiet and unobtrusive is more likely to determine the source of these disturbances."

"I wouldn't stay anyway," the Colonel said gruffly. "Not at night. Not on the mountain. You want to go hunting in the valley, I'm your man for as long as you like, we'd get some good big pelts. But not on the mountain."

"I understand," I said.

Jula leaned closer, joining our conversation. "Have you been to the mountain, Colonel? What IS it there? I've heard it's a ghost."

"I don't know," Wren said shortly. "Don't want to know, either."

That night I lay in my bed in the mansion's best guest room. I'll admit my thoughts were more on the past that on the future. I was seeing my former Master in my mind's eye. So beautiful.

It was almost a cliche, the Padawan falling in love with his Master. It happened all the time. Why, I even knew of cases of heterosexual apprentices falling wildly in love with their Masters of the same sex, the bond is just that strong.

But my case, I told myself stubbornly, is different. It's different because she is different. The most beautiful, wise, serene, warm and loving... I had a picture of her, and slipped it out of my pack. Master Adi! I know she thought I was too young, but I wouldn't always be young. I pictured an older Obi-Wan, tough and battle-hardened, returning to the Temple to see the dawn of love in Adi Gallia's eyes.

It was a tempting vision, but this mission was unlikely to advance my cause. Discontentedly, I restored the picture to its place and flopped back onto the bed and tried to sleep.

We were three nights on the road, three days of a slog-paced ride on the six-legged riding and pack beasts of Caloon. There were trails, but no real roads.

Colonel Wren was an entertaining travelling companion for the first two days, not a great intellect but a good story teller. From him I learned about all the beasts native to the region and his slightly bigoted views on the Nifgif aborigines. But as we drew nearer to the mountains he became more laconic. He was troubled by the region we were entering and didn't try to hide it.

I pressed him to learn more, but he was reluctant to speak of it. "I've never really seen anything," he insisted. "But whenever I'm here, I just feel... watched."

It seemed a silly concern to me; what with the wildlife in the area, of course he'd been watched.

He saw my skeptical look and turned in the high creaking saddle. "And not by no forest beast, or Nifgif neither," he said. "I know what that feels like. And this was just ... different. That's all."

He subsided into his saddle and turned back to face the trail. "Can't explain it," he said sullenly.

The last day before we reached our destination, we encountered a tribe of Nifgif. These small, broad and furry humanoids were nomadic hunter-gatherers, travelling with all their worldly goods from one camping spot to another. They were protected under Republic law and most of the planet was reserved for their roaming.

The Nifgif greeted the Colonel cheerfully; he was obviously a great favorite of theirs. We stopped there in the trail, the Colonel searching through his packs to see if he had anything that would meet with favor.

Their Shaman-Chief exclaimed with delight at the sight of the Colonel's teapot, and gave him three rich pelts and a string of shells in exchange. I recognized the shells as the primary ingredient in a luminescent makeup paste much favored by the ladies of Coruscant, and reckoned that the Colonel would make a fair profit on the exchange.

The conversation was in Nifgif, which I was unable to follow, but something the Colonel said agitated the old Shaman. He pointed to the mountains and shook his head in violent disagreement.

"He's saying not to go to the mountain," Wren translated for me. "Come back later, he says, when the Mountain Spirit is less angry."

"Why does he consider the spirit angry?" I asked.

There followed more dialog in Nifgif, and the Colonel reported, "I'm not quite following it, but he's saying they'd camped at the foot and the wind was angry with them. Their tents were damaged and the logs flew."

"Sounds like a storm," I commented.

"A bad one, though," Wren said.

"Odd we saw no signs of bad weather. We're not that far out."

"That's one of the tricky things about the mountain," Wren explained. "Very localized weather disturbances. Something to watch out for."

"I'll be careful," I said.

Eventually we took to the trail again, the Shaman of the Nifgif saddened that he had been unable to turn us from our course.

And now the mountain loomed above us. It looked like quite an ordinary mountain. We took a trail leading upward. It was a narrow trail, frequented by game animals seeking water. No humans or Nifgif frequented these parts.

We reached a clearing halfway up the mountain and Wren announced that here would be my camp site. It was a beautiful spot, a glade in the woods with the sound of trickling water from a spring nearby.

Camp was erected rapidly, Wren obviously in a hurry to get off the mountain by sundown. I was half amused and half apprehensive. I reminded myself that I was Jedi and could send out mental fields that would cause predators to pass me by. Whether the mental fields would influence ghosts was something I had never tested.

He gathered up the pack beasts and remounted. "We're agreed now," he said. "I'm back in a month, new moon, right here."

"Agreed," I said.

He hesitated. "I don't feel right, leaving a fellow alone out here, Jedi or no Jedi."

"It will be quite all right," I assured him. "We receive training in not being noticed. I intend to simply creep around the mountain taking notes and enjoying nature until your return."

Wren nodded sharply. "Very well, then. One month." And he turned his mount and rode off, with his string of pack animals trailing behind.

I was alone. Completely alone. It felt surprisingly good. This was not a totally new experience, of course, and was quite similar to wilderness survival training.

I built a small fire and ate some dried rations. The spring water was remarkably sweet. I wrote some notes in my journal before retiring to my tent. In my bedroll, I listened to the night sounds of strange and unknown creatures and looked out onto a field of stars totally unlike the Coruscant night sky. This was beginning to feel like an adventure.

In the morning I began exploring. I had the survey maps done by Republic surveyors when the planet was opened for settlement, and began to acquaint myself with my surroundings. It was a beautiful day, not too warm or too cool, and the hike was stimulating. I assessed the currents of the Force as I walked and had to admit that I felt... something. I couldn't define it. Not necessarily something wrong or evil. Just something.

Jedi are trained to move without notice and my travel was almost soundless. Several times, I thought I caught movement out of the corner of my eye. But when I turned or moved to the spot I thought I'd seen the movement, there was nothing.

Several days were spent in this manner. I can't say I was apprehensive; I was actually thoroughly enjoying myself. And on the fourth day, the Spirit of the Mountain made a mistake.

I was at a higher elevation and again caught a movement out of the corner of my eye. But this time when I went to the spot where I thought I'd seen a motion, there was something there to see.

Last night's rain had left the trail soft, even muddy in spots, and there it was. A footprint. A remarkably human-looking footprint. I placed my own booted foot beside the bare print and determined that the owner of this foot was significantly larger than I.

But more than that. I looked up the trail, smiling with satisfaction. Ghosts don't leave footprints.

Part II

I was close now, I could feel it. I hurried up the trail. The creature I was trailing was in a hurry this time, too much of a hurry to be careful, and I could easily follow by the broken leaf, the flattened grass. I was going to find out what this was all about!

As I moved forward, I felt a sudden gust of wind. Looking up, I saw dark clouds boiling furiously over the mountain top. Lightning lanced through the air, felling a tree further up the trail and sending it crashing across the trail. And then the rain fell, buckets of water drenching me to the skin instantly.

Just a coincidence? My sense of the living Force said no. I felt the currents of force swirling as madly as the wind, which was driving this rain in all directions so that I could not face away from it for more than a moment.

I struggled on up the path, more determined than ever to get to the bottom of this mystery. I reached the downed tree and climbed over it. Then I leaned back against the tree and reconsidered my plan.

The trail was a river of mud. The rain was turning to sleet, and my fingers were growing numb with the cold. But more than the difficulty of continuing came the question, why? To do what? To race into a confrontation with whatever was haunting this mountain?

Coming to a decision, I clambered back over the tree and retraced my steps, finding my way back to the clearing and my camp. As I went, the storm abated, becoming a simple downpour. Once back at camp, I removed my clothing and stood under the rain, washing away the mud that had coated me to the eyebrows. I hung my clothes on a branch to let the rain wash them clear and then crawled into my tent.

I found a clean, dry tunic and slipped it on, and huddled into my bedroll. As the rain continued, I considered my plans.

I knew now that the Spirit of the Mountain was not a myth, but a definite corporal being. One who seemed able to control the Force with almost Jedi skill. And I knew that he lived further up the mountain. So let him think he had driven me back. Tomorrow the hunt would begin in earnest, and knowing that he was there, I would hunt with utmost stealth. I didn't want to confront this person or fight with him; I merely wanted to observe. That was my assignment. Find out what the situation is.

The next morning I put my plan into action. I redoubled my stealth. Where before I was unobtrusive, now I was invisible. Where once I was quiet, now I was silent as the vacuum of space. Silent, invisible, I was a ghost hunting a ghost.

And I found him.

It was late afternoon when I came to the ledge. It was a wide space just below the mountain top. I crept to the edge of the woods and peered cautiously out.

A man sat on a log in front of a cave entrance. He was turned partly away from me, facing out over the valley, as he worked a heavy skin, treating it for use.

A man? Yes, he seemed to be completely human. But such a man as I had never seen before.

He was a savage, it seemed, dressed in skins. A skin wrapped his hips, and a heavy skin still furred was fastened around his shoulders like a cloak. The cloak was thrown back in the warmth of the afternoon sun. The knife he was using appeared to be made of bone.

The man was not young, I could see plentiful gray in his long mane of hair and streaking his beard. His life had been hard; I saw a long jagged scar across one shoulder and another on his back. He was big, imposing even when seated.

I watched him in awe for a long time. There was something magnificent about him. I kept my place under the leaves until the sun was almost down, then turned and quietly crept back to my camp.

I had a lot to think about as I threw together a prefab meal. Was this what was haunting the mountain? Had this savage created the storm yesterday? Could he possibly know how to use the Force? I would have to continue my stealthy surveillance, be patient and watch.

For the next days I stalked my quarry. I'd forgotten to bemoan my assignment, so caught up was I in the fascination of it. In fact, I was living a childhood fantasy.

As a boy, my favorite vidshow had been the nature program Outer Rim. Every week I made sure to have time in my schedule to watch my heroes as they ventured into trackless wilderness to observe strange and colorful wildlife, beasts rare and strange, unknown to humanity until discovered and recorded by the intrepid explorers. Though I never lost my commitment to my Jedi calling, there was always a small part of me that wanted to be a naturalist, to venture into the wilderness, away from civilization, to hear and respond to the call of the wild.

To think that I would have passed up this assignment if given my preference!

I kept meticulous notes as I gradually came to know the man I thought of as the Spirit. He lived a solitary life. I saw no signs of clan or family, and he avoided the Nifgif when they traversed the area. As I followed him on his solitary rounds, he led the life of a hunter-gatherer. He hunted seldom and more often dug for roots and gathered fruits and nuts from the trees. He seemed to know just where to go and what to find there.

How long had he been here? Where had he come from? My briefing book said that humans had come to Caloon thirty-five years ago, and even then the Nifgif already spoke of The Spirit of the Mountain.

And was he the source of the Force disturbance? For days I saw no evidence of it. I was beginning to think that the mountain itself might be some naturally occurring Force vortex, though I'd never heard of such a thing. But this man was prosaically primitive.

I reassessed my opinion the day the Spirit went hunting. Wrapped more thoroughly in skins and carrying a heavy spear, he descended from the mountain and stalked a herd of kradlik, huge lumbering beasts bearing heavy pelts and impressive racks of horns. I followed at a circumspect distance, managing to conceal myself in the tall grass.

It was enthralling to watch him as he warily approached the herd, moving with feline grace. I wondered how he would go about this hunt.

Eventually, one beast moved a distance from the herd. I saw the Spirit consider the beast and make his selection. And then he raised himself to his full height and seemed to throw something. But I saw clearly that there had been nothing in his hand. Nonetheless, between the straying beast and the rest of the herd, a ball of fire blossomed, twirling frantically. Predictably, the animals stampeded, and Spirit was off after the one beast running away from the rest of the herd.

I raised to my feet in astonishment, but he was too engrossed in his hunt to notice. That had been Force manipulation, no question about it.

Now he hurled the spear with deadly accuracy and the beast fell dead. I could feel the impact through my feet, as far away as I was.

Then I was treated to another demonstration that this savage was indeed the Force adept I'd been seeking, as the huge dead beast rose eerily into the air and then docilely floated behind him as he returned to his mountain aerie.

I crept to one side to watch him and his strange cargo pass. He was smiling in satisfaction. I imagined this one kill would keep him in meat for a good long time if he knew how to preserve it.

Giving the Spirit plenty of time to return to his lair, I followed after and took up my customary spot under the trees. Now he had work to do, lots of it, as he set up drying racks over the open fire and began to butcher the huge beast. I felt quite indolent to be reclining on the moss and taking notes.

Some time later I heard a whine, and a large wolf trotted up to the camp site. I had seen him encounter the Spirit before and knew that they were acquaintances. It was fascinating to watch them close up, as the Spirit whined back at the wolf, caressed his ears roughly and then presented him with the large liver. The wolf licked the man's hand as if in thanks and then picked up his prize and trotted off.

I was relieved to see him go, fearing that my scent might draw him to my hiding place, but it seemed that the wolf was too busy to be concerned or too eager to find a place of solitude to devour his treat.

The hunt had been soon after dawn, and all day I watched the Spirit at his labors. He seemed to have a use for most of the parts of the kradlik. I assumed the stomach would make a water container and the horns and bones would be fashioned into tools and implements. The hide was carefully removed in one piece and spread to dry, and then the tedious business of cutting the meat into small strips for drying began.

In the mid-afternoon, Spirit cut a whole haunch from the beast and set it to roasting on a spit over the fire. The smell of roast meat tantalized me and I realized that I hadn't eaten all day. But I wasn't about to move from my spot. Judging from the amount of meat, this hunt was an event that occurred only several times a year, and I wanted to gather as much information as possible.

So great was my thirst for new information, I forgot the information I already possessed. The piece of information most regrettably missing from the forefront of my mind was the fact that childees hunt at dusk.

The fact was brought back to me when I heard a strange trilling noise from directly overhead, and looked up to see a childee in the tree above me.

Colonel Wren had waxed voluble about the childees. These long-snouted tree-dwelling creatures were no larger than a medium-sized dog, but they hunted in packs and their claws were venomous. A scratch from a childee would send a man into a delirious fever. Enough scratches would send him to his death.

I began to slowly move my hand toward the lightsaber on my hip, keeping eye contact with the childee above me, though I heard new trilling from all around me.

The childee in the tree dropped like a stone, and I had my saber up and out in an instant, striking it down. But six other childee surrounded me and more were rushing up. I felt a blade of fire run across my chest and knew that I'd been scored by one of the deadly claws.

The flush of fever was almost instantaneous, but I still retained enough consciousness to hear a loud roar and observed fire balls exploding all around me. Through the flurry of battle I saw the Spirit running toward me as I sank to my knees. And then blackness.

There followed an interminable period of nightmarish visions, punctuated by flashes that might or might not be legitimate memories. I thought I saw the Spirit hovering over me, concern in his eyes. I seem to remember saying aloud, "Your eyes are blue!" At the moment, it seemed a fact of astonishing importance.

A sense of floating and more blackness. Brief glimpses of fire and stone, the feel of fur, heat and pain. The Spirit still haunted my dreams, sometimes holding a gourd filled with water to my lips and sometimes wiping my face with something soft and damp. The savage Spirit as nursemaid! Obviously delusional.

I slept, hallucinated, and slept some more.

And then I awoke. Weak as a baby and twice as cranky, but alive. I looked around. I was in a cave. Obviously in THE cave, the home of the Spirit of the Mountain. So much for observing unobtrusively! I lay on a pile of furs, with another fur tucked around me.

Moving under the fur, I determined that I was unclothed, bare except for a band of leather around my chest. I peeked under the fur and determined that the leather was in fact a bandage, packed with some sort of moss.

I extended my review of my surroundings further and saw that I was alone in the cave. My clothing was neatly piled in a niche, along with my boots and my lightsaber. I was relieved to see the saber; I could fetch it to my hand in an instant if it became necessary. Not that I expected to have to fight. Surely even the wildest savage wouldn't bother curing his victims before killing them. No, for some reason the Spirit had saved my life. I wondered why.

Hearing footsteps, I realized I would be able to ask the man himself. The Spirit entered the cave, carrying a group of root vegetables by their stems. He saw that I was awake and smiled.

I raised myself on one elbow and asked, "Who are you?"

He flinched in surprise at the noise I made, but his eyes betrayed not the slightest comprehension. Of course, he didn't speak Republic Standard. But the man was a Force adept, so I tried again, speaking directly to his mind - "Who are you?"

He shook his head in astonishment. My message had obviously been received. But still no comprehension. Oh, of course! The thought was expressed in words, as most verbal species express their thoughts, words that he could not comprehend.

Trying again, I projected the emotion of intense curiosity. I pointed to myself and said, "Obi-Wan", and then pointed at him.

He nodded, pointed to himself and said, "Ki."

Ah, so he could speak, if only he knew the words! He pointed to me now, and added, "Bee-wan?"

"OH-bee-wan."

We were making progress. I pointed to him and said, "Ki." I wondered if Ki was his name, or simply his word for 'me'.

Again I projected curiosity, gesturing to myself and my surroundings. He thought about it and then sat down on the log that served as his living room sofa. Taking up a bone knife, he began to cut the tops off the tubers as we 'conversed'. First he pointed at me, then shaded his eyes as if watching from afar, and then pointed to himself.

I thought about that and translated, "'You watch me.'"

He pointed to himself, shaded his eyes, pointed to me, shaded his eyes, and then pointed to himself again. A bit more complicated, but after a moment, I interpreted, "'I saw you watching me.'"

And here I thought I'd been so stealthy, the perfect naturalist! He'd known all along I was there!

Now he pointed to me again, made a stabbing gesture to his chest, pointed to himself, and then waved his hands in negation. I took that to mean, "'You didn't attack me.'"

He nodded and smiled, clasping his hands together. After a long pause, I said hopefully, "'We're friends.'"

He came over and knelt beside me, taking my hands and squeezing them. I squeezed back. There was something so endearing about his smile. What was I going to do with this strange man?

Part III

The tubers turned out to be my dinner. Wrapped in their own leaves and roasted in the coals of the fire, they yielded a pale blue mush, bland and slightly sweet. Served on a wooden plate and eaten with a bone spoon, it seemed the perfect invalid diet.

I had been propped up against the rock wall to eat and when finished I scooted down under the fur and wrapped myself up again. The bed-pile was well situated beside the interior fire and I saw no other piles of furs in the cave.

I felt a bit guilty for taking over what was obviously Ki's bed, but once dinner had been cleared away, the man removed his clothing and slid under the fur beside me. I couldn't help tensing a bit, but he merely turned onto his side facing me, threw an arm over my body, and was asleep within seconds.

It took a while before I could go to sleep myself. It was a strange feeling, lying here naked with this naked stranger close by my side. To me, sleeping in the same bed had a definite sexual connotation, especially with nakedness factored in. I've had sexual experiences, of course; my devotion to my beautiful Master did not prevent me from seeking pleasure and release in others' beds. Mostly women, but several men as well.

But Ki didn't seem to put the same significance on bed sharing. The innocent savage was merely sharing space and body heat. After a while, it began to feel soothing. Ki was much bigger than the men I had slept with in the past, and his presence made me feel both young and helpless, and warm and secure. Whatever dangers this world might hold, I was under the protection of the Spirit of the Mountain.

After this brief excursion into lucidity, I spent the next several days alternating between raging fever and teeth-chattering chills. Ki was constantly at my side, patiently replacing the furs I threw off, holding to my lips gourds of cool water or horncups of hot, bitter tea. I recall one shivering fit during which I was wrapped well in the furs and held on Ki's lap while he soothingly stroked my back and uttered a strange droning chant. I wondered if he was performing some primitive magic, as he intoned, "Lee lon, klo say. Dahz on, naye tee naye." Were these Nifgif words, or was he the sole survivor of a now-extinct tribe of humans?

The moments of clarity gradually came more often and lasted longer, the bouts with chills and fever passing more quickly. I began to hope that I was on the mend.

When I woke, the slant of the sun through the cave entrance told me it was mid-afternoon. Ki was absent, but I felt a warm presence beside me. Turning my head, I was startled to see the wolf lying close beside me.

He was lying still, nose down between his paws, but sensing my regard, he raised his head. I held eye-contact with the beast for a long while as he panted gently beside me. Eventually I drifted back to sleep.

When next I woke, the wolf was still there, whining softly as footsteps approached. Ki entered the cave, a bag in his hand. The wolf padded over to him and Ki patted his head and growled something. The wolf slipped out of the cave.

I pointed after the wolf and projected curiosity. Ki smiled and pantomimed shivering, then hugged himself. He seemed to be saying that I was chilled and his wolf friend had kept me warm. I couldn't help smiling; what a strange household I was visiting!

Now Ki opened his bag and pulled out some fresh greenery. He handed me a leaf and I sniffed it. It seemed to be the same plant from which the herbal tea was derived. He held up another leaf and took a bite of it and then pointed to me. I took a small bite and he nodded. He handed me several more leaves.

A picture came to my mind, an overgrown river valley between the mountains, and Ki hiking through the bog in search of fresh herbs. Presumably, the fresh leaves would have more effectiveness than the dried leaves used in the tea.

As I obediently chewed on the leaves, I pondered the point that Ki had just sent me a mental picture. I gave it a try, sending a picture of a river. He looked at me curiously, and I said, "River."

A picture of a mountain, saying, "Mountain." And a picture of the wolf, "Wolf."

I was thrilled to see comprehension dawning in his eyes. He sent back the same three pictures, saying slowly, "River. Mountain. Wolf."

And that was Ki's first lesson in Republic Standard.

I was still quite weak, but the fever and chills had passed. Ki seemed to have accepted me as a member of his household, and found small tasks for me to accomplish. He was enjoying his language lessons, learning more every day.

I was learning too, and one of my primary adjustments was to learn to be unconcerned with Ki's casual nudity. The man had no natural sense of modesty, understandable if he'd lived on his own for years or decades. He wrapped himself with furs when the temperature dropped, and usually wore a bit of leather around his hips when travelling. This I assumed was for the protection of his genitals, since his attire in the cave was generally nothing at all.

I had fallen into the habit of wearing only my leggings around the cave and camp. Bare feet were more suited to the narrow trails and steep pathways.

Ki was fascinated by my clothing. He tried on the tunic, but it was much too small for him. The robe looked just right on him, and he stroked the cloth with wonder. Then he straightened up and put his hands in the opposite sleeves, meeting my eyes with a serene look, and I caught my breath at the sight. What a Jedi he would have made!

For some reason, I had the sudden urge to cry. But he laughed then and pulled me into a hug. I hugged back, hard.

The next day we split up, Ki to fish and I to collect nuts. I'd tasted this dish before, the fish stuffed with chewy nuts, and looked forward to having it again. I filled the floppy basket with a huge quantity of nuts, pleased to make myself useful. Returning to the cave, I found three large fish lying gutted beside the fire, and went to work. I shelled the nuts and stuffed the fish, holding them together with sticks and wrapping them with flat pungent leaves. I arranged the leaf packages on the coals, and looked around, wondering where Ki had gotten to.

Perhaps he had gone bathing. Close by the cavern was a pool fed by a spring, intensely cold, but clear and invigorating. I went to investigate.

As I stepped out of the trees, I saw that I was right, Ki had come to the bathing spring, and was lying on the flat rock beside the water. He was still damp and his wet hair spread across his shoulders. I was used to his nakedness by now and it wasn't that which brought me to a confused halt.

Ki was masturbating. Eyes half closed, one big hand roamed his chest, pinching and tickling at his nipples, while the other hand was wrapped around his erect cock, slowly moving up and down. His hips rolled gently and he took his time, in no particular hurry, enjoying the sensations he was arousing in his body.

I gasped, feeling a welter of confusing emotions, embarrassment and envy and appreciation. There was something so natural in this picture, so right. And arousing! My leggings felt too tight suddenly as I watched the motions of those rough and gentle hands.

And then he looked over and caught my eye. He smiled and turned toward me, spreading his legs wider as if inviting me to watch. That action, which sounds lewd to the civilized listener, struck me forcefully as a gesture of utter innocence. Of course, living on his own, Ki had absorbed no modern notions of modesty or shame. He had learned that these actions gave pleasure and saw no reason to hide them. He was using both hands now, moving faster and rougher, almost at an end.

I can't even begin to describe how beautiful he was then, as he threw back his head, thrusting with his hips as he came. I stood as if paralyzed, watching the thick cream spurt across his chest and belly. He collapsed on the rock now, eyes closed and great chest heaving with exertion, and beautiful, so beautiful!

I turned and ran then, ran as fast as I could, in what direction I didn't know, just running and running until I could stand it no longer and I fell to my knees. Fumbling at my waistband, I freed my hard cock and began to pump it rapidly, lost in the memory of what I had just seen.

In my imagination, the hands touching me were not my own. Ki's big hands had touched me often, bandaging my wound, holding my head up to drink my tea, and numerous other occasions. He was quite a physical man, touching easily and often, a touch to the elbow, to the shoulder. So I knew those hands well. And now I wanted them right here! The image was overwhelming, as I pumped harder and faster, until I had to bite my lip to keep from screaming as I came harder than I'd ever come in my life.

I hung my head and panted harshly, trying to recover my equilibrium. Then a slight sound caught my attention and I raised my head and looked behind me. Ki stood on the edge of the clearing, head to one side, watching me with bemusement. I closed my eyes, wondering how I was going to explain this with our very limited shared vocabulary, but then he turned and was gone.

I returned to the cave warily, thinking deeply as I went. I wasn't sure what I was going to say, but I didn't want to infect this innocent with the mores and inhibitions of Coruscant society.

But the subject never arose. The fish was well-roasted by the time I arrived, and Ki handed me a wooden platter with a smile, and our conversation dealt with fishing. Ki was picking up the language quickly; it made it easier than he was a Force-adept. When he didn't know the word he was seeking, he could send me a picture, and I would give him the appropriate word. There seemed to be many types of fish in the river between the mountains, and the topic kept us occupied until time for bed.

As was our habit, we shared the pile of skins. I had grown used to the innocent comfort of sleeping in Ki's arms, so it came as a surprise to awaken in the night to discover that the situation had changed.

I lay on my side facing the fire with Ki spooned up behind me, and that was as usual. What was unusual, though, was that I was quite erect and Ki was slowly stroking my erection.

I came awake with a start to find myself being skillfully masturbated, my cock in the very hands I had fantasized about earlier. My hips moved automatically and as I moved, I realized that Ki too was erect, his penis thrust between my thighs.

I should stop this, I told myself, pull away, do something! But the feeling was so exquisite! And it was not merely my physical senses that were being bombarded by delightful stimuli; my emotions were also under siege.

I was receiving from Ki wave after wave of emotion, intense affection and desire. He could no more shield his emotions than he could calculate a hyperjump, and I moved gently against his naked body, luxuriating in the sweetness of his naked mind. He was so fond of me! He knew this act gave me pleasure, he'd seen that this afternoon. He wanted to give me pleasure. He wanted me to have the pleasure from him, and he wanted to watch. He found me extremely attractive, enjoyed watching me attain this pleasure, enjoyed the touch of my skin, the way I gasped and moved.

Ki was moving now, thrusting with his hips, and I felt his delight at the contact. Oh, giving oneself pleasure was fine, but to share pleasure like this was so much better! He nuzzled my shoulder, and I pressed back against him almost purring. Forget that I was the civilized man here, I was helpless, and liked it that way. Let him do what he wished with me.

We moved together faster, and I felt the sweat between us as we slid slickly in the instinctive dance until the threshold was reached and I was arching back howling as I came. I felt his hand tighten around me, and he was coming as well, thrusting rapidly between my legs, and we were both laughing from the sheer joy of it.

We lay together panting for a few moments and then Ki moved back. But it was only a space, so that he could move me over onto my back and then he moved on top of me.

He was such a big man but he straddled me with his legs on either side of mine, so that we could touch all along our bodies without my taking all of his weight. It felt so good. He raised himself onto his elbows and smiled down at me, stroking my hair back from my face and tracing his fingertips across my eyebrows and lips. He didn't have the words, but I got the idea. He liked looking at me. I smiled back and traced his face with my own fingers. "Beautiful," I said.

"Beeyoo-tiful," he replied.

We lay together for a while, touching randomly, stroking a cheekbone, a nipple, a flank. Amazing that this man could be such a wonderful lover, he who had never had a lover. And then I realized that there was something he didn't know about, and I reached up to his head, pulling it toward mine.

He resisted, puzzled, so I lifted myself up to him and gently kissed him on the lips. Curious, he leaned down and repeated the gesture. I kissed him again. We kissed together.

Then he leaned on his elbow and gave me a perplexed look.

"Feels good," I said. "Shows affection."

We kissed again. He chuckled. I slipped my tongue out and lightly traced his lip. He replied with his tongue, and I snatched it between my lips, pulling it into my mouth.

"Mmm!" Ki said indignantly.

I sucked gently on his tongue in suggestive pulses.

"Mmm!" he said again, but with more appreciation.

We kissed for a long, long time. After a while, I branched out, demonstrating kissing on the throat, the chest, the hands. Ki had decided that this activity was indeed pleasurable, and tried everything I showed him, returning often to kiss me on the mouth.

Inevitably, our explorations caused renewed arousal. We were wrapped in one another's arms, Ki atop me, and our erections slid deliciously together as we kissed and kissed. Soon we were gasping for breath, clinging frantically to one another as we pushed together as if trying to merge into one being. We moved together faster and faster until we came again, and then lay together trembling. And then we resumed kissing until we fell asleep.

Part IV

I took to Ki's mode of dress when in and around the cave. It seemed pointless to wear leggings when living with a man who made a point of snatching them off every chance he got. Much easier to simply go naked.

It made life interesting, since Ki also had the tendency to pet me whenever I went by, a friendly stroke on the buttocks or penis, whichever was handiest. Then he would often pull me down onto his lap for a more thorough embrace.

He liked to decorate me, too. My hair, which I'd been growing out since my knighting, had reached the floppy, impossible length, so Ki fashioned me a leather headband which he adorned with feathers. He frequently braided his own hair and worked feathers into the braids. Ki tended to favor the blue and green feathers for himself, but thought I looked best in the reds and yellows.

Ki's lifestyle seemed subsistence level, but gathering food and fuel actually occupied only a small part of the day. The rest of the time was spent with art and entertainment. The jattah nuts were not ripe yet, but we harvested a basketful, anyway. When we returned to the cave, Ki took out his sharpest knife and demonstrated what he wanted them for. At this season, the nuts bore a bright green outer skin with a lovely yellow beneath. Ki drilled holes through the nuts and then began to carve them in various abstract designs. I joined him at the bead-making project.

It was fun. It was also quite a departure for me, to be making something that served no purpose other than to be attractive. I was suddenly reminded of a chance encounter years ago in a Coruscant night spot.

I was still a Padawan several years from knighthood, out on the town with a group of my peers. I'd met a young woman and we struck up a conversation. Looking back, I winced to realize what a pompous young prig I must have sounded as I tried to impress her. I was Jedi and surely that was a very impressive thing to be. I'd been surprised at her reaction, though. After hearing probably much more than she cared to about life in the Temple, she'd frowned thoughtfully and said, "It doesn't sound like you had much of a childhood."

I'd been offended then, and hastened to assure her that the children were quite well-treated in the Order. Our lives were certainly structured, but we lacked for nothing.

But now I thought I saw what the young lady had meant. My childhood had been a happy one, but there were always tests, always comparisons, always another level above you to aspire to, and when you attained it, another level above that.

I looked over at Ki, concentrating on his bead making. His carvings were fluid and instinctive compared to my more mannered geometric designs. I felt a sudden surge of affection for him and an admiration for his ability to simple BE.

He felt my eyes on him and looked up. I smiled at him and he set his work carefully to one side and slid over to me, pulling me close.

The big hands moved up my bare back as his lips closed over a nipple, and I sighed. With his arms still around me, he rolled until we were on the furs. He was already getting hard.

It was another interesting feature of life with Ki, that we would have sex whenever the mood struck us, day or night. And the mood seemed to strike us often.

He moved down my body now, kissing and licking. I was glad I'd taught him about kissing. Now his tongue glided over my penis and I arched up to his touch. I'd taught him that, too. Our earlier sexual encounters had primarily consisted of pressing and rubbing ourselves against the other until friction brought release. But one day I'd taken Ki's penis into my mouth, to his great astonishment. He had enjoyed the process immensely and quickly returned the favor. He was a fast learner.

I moaned and Ki chuckled, causing me to moan even more. I lay back helpless on the pile of furs, moving instinctively, as he leaned over me, moving his mouth up and down. His hair was unbound and moved over my thighs and belly. One hand played lightly with my balls while the other held the base of my cock, and I reached down and grabbed his wonderful hair, holding him in place as I arched up harder and faster until I came with a shout of sheer delight.

I lay back panting and he stretched out beside me, smiling with satisfaction. But I felt his erection pressing against my thigh and finally opened my eyes. I rolled onto my side, pressing Ki onto his back, and began to stroke him. He kept his eyes locked onto mine, smiling at me with that great wonderful affection that made me feel so warm. I took his erection in my hand and ran my hand up and down, making a tube of my hand for him to thrust into while I continued to stroke his beautiful body. I kissed his throat and sucked lightly on his nipples as he moved gently beneath me.

I speeded and slowed my hand several times, drawing out his pleasure, and my pleasure in pleasing him. And finally I speeded up for the final time, and feeling his orgasm imminent I fastened my lips to his, kissing him deeply as he came.

And then we kissed for a long while.

It should be obvious that my pose as a naturalist had been long abandoned. Indeed, the very fact of my mission crossed my mind only rarely. But then one evening after dinner, Ki mentioned that we would find good hunting in the valley come the full moon. And I sat up with a start, remembering the moon. I leapt to my feet and raced out of the cave.

Ki followed, puzzled, and found me searching the sky. He could not understand my dismay when I beheld a half moon, waxing.

I had overstayed my time. I was to have met with Colonel Wren for my return at the new moon.

I set off down the mountain. Ki followed me. And I came to the clearing where my camp had been. Nothing remained. It seemed that Colonel Wren had come and gone, collected my goods and returned to report my disappearance. I stared off across the plains, biting my lip, wondering what to do.

Ki touched my arm. Even with his new language skills, he spoke seldom. "What is wrong?" he asked.

I gestured down the mountain. "I was supposed to meet with my guide," I said. "Over a week ago. We were to meet here to return to the capital, and now he's come and gone and how long it will take me to return on foot..."

I broke off my complaint. From my companion, I was feeling the emotion of purest astonishment. I realized then that we had never discussed how I came to be on the Mountain, that when I had come to his camp and moved into his home, he had assumed, could only assume, that I had come to stay.

I turned to him then and looked into his eyes. I think I was glad that there was only the dim light of the half moon. I had never watched a heart break before.

He didn't say a word. Speech was still new to him. He looked at me for a long, long moment. Then he touched me briefly on the shoulder and turned and walked away, back up the mountain.

I watched him go, aching for the sheer dignity of the man, and weeping inside for a man who'd been so alone for so long that he didn't even know how to say goodbye.

I stood there for a long time, dithering. How long would it take me to return to Janzel on foot? A week? A week there, a quick message sent to the Temple, and a week to return.

But could I leave Ki for two weeks? No, of course I couldn't. In the time since I'd been taken in by the Spirit of the Mountain, my priorities had changed. Yes, I was Jedi and I owed them my allegiance. But I owed Ki as well. Perhaps more, since he had no one else.

I turned and headed back up the mountain. Once I'd reassured Ki, I'd think of some way to get a message to the capital and from there to Coruscant.

When I returned to the cave, I wondered what I would say to Ki. But he was already in the bedroll, curled into a ball. I crept in and slid under the fur behind him, putting my arms around him. He leaned back against me with a sigh and I realized he had my robe with him, held tightly in his arms like a child's comfort blanket. I kissed him on the forehead and he turned and placed his head on my chest. I stroked his neck and shoulder for a while before we both fell asleep.

The next morning, I awoke on the brink of orgasm. With what few shreds of brain tissue were still functioning, I saw that Ki was leaning over me, taking me into his mouth. I was moaning aloud, writhing beneath him, and coming almost before I was aware what was happening.

I collapsed onto the furs with a groan of satiety and Ki was beside me. Stroking, kissing and licking, he set to work arousing me again. He was overwhelming, and it was wonderful, it was glorious, it was... actually rather frightening. I realized then that there was something different about this experience. From Ki I was feeling not just affection and desire, but something else. After a moment, I recognized it as anxiety. It was as if he feared that he had to give me pleasure, more pleasure than I'd ever experienced, in order to keep me from leaving.

I stroked his back and urged him into my arms. "Ki," I whispered, "take it easy, it's alright. Really, everything's okay."

He met my eyes, uncertain.

I reached up and stroked his cheek, ran my hand through his long gray-streaked hair. "Ki, I love you," I told him.

He smiled, but it was a polite smile, the smile of a man who hasn't the slightest idea what I'm talking about.

"Love," I said. "It means I care about you. More than I care about anyone else."

Oh, it was worth it, to see the warmth return to his eyes! I berated myself for a moment to be saying such things, until I realized that it was true. This strange man had become the most important person in my life. I pulled him down into a kiss. He subsided happily in my arms and we kissed one another for a long time before rising to face the day.

After that our former routine seemed to be in place. It was as if I'd never spoken of leaving. But my mind was troubled. I'd forgotten for a while about the galaxy outside our little paradise. And I knew the galaxy would not leave us in peace.

Perhaps it was the worry that caused me to experience a relapse into the fever and chills caused by the childee scratch. It was not as severe as the first occurrence, and apparently something to be expected. Ki, at least, seemed not to consider it unusual as he went about brewing me the bitter herbal teas.

Once again Ki held and rocked me as I shivered, and once again he intoned his strange chant, "Lee lon, klo say. Dahz on, naye tee naye."

But this time, I recognized the odd incantation. Weakly, I sang, "Little one, close your eyes. Day is done; night is nigh." I continued on for several of the familiar old verses, as Ki listened and nodded with delight. And then I drifted off to sleep, too tired to even begin to wonder where an Outer Rim barbarian had learned a Coruscant lullaby.

We stayed close to the cave for several days following my relapse, but then Ki said we should take a trip. There was something he wanted me to see.

We wrapped well for the journey. I wore my leggings, tunics, boots and cloak, while Ki dressed in an odd assortment of furs and skins. He packed a bag with several days worth of dried food.

We descended first to the plain. Ki explained that we were going to the other side of the mountain, but with the sheer cliffs on the other side, going over the mountain top was impossible, so we would be going around.

I watched Ki as I followed him down the trail, pondering the strange shifts in circumstances. Less than two months ago I'd arrived on Caloon anxious to finish this mission and be on to something more interesting, something to allow me to make my name and impress Master Adi. Now I dreaded the time I would again be in contact with my Order. What effect would it have on Ki? And how was it that my happiness had become so intertwined with his?

We had reached the plain now and began our trek around the mountain. It was a beautiful day, clear and bright and neither too hot or too cool. I took a deep breath. The air of Caloon has an invigorating quality.

Ki held up his hand and then put a finger to his lips and pointed. I followed his finger with my eyes and saw a grazing herd of kradlik. They were safe today, Ki not having brought his spear. He was well-stocked with kradlik meat so today we could merely admire them.

They were magnificent beasts, seven feet at the shoulder, with long necks. Their tawny hides were adorned with chocolate stripes; Ki had many such hides in his dwelling. The males carried great branches of antler on their heads.

As we walked quietly and watched the herd, I heard a great bellow and jumped at the sound. Ki smiled and waved his hand, indicating there was no cause for alarm. He pointed at the source of the bellow, and I watched as the greatest of the kradlik reared up to mount a willing female.

She screamed in answer, and the two great beasts coupled loudly in the midst of the herd. I felt the blood pounding in my throat; it was an arousing sight. Ki moved closer to me and I heard his breath quicken. He stood behind me and his arms closed around me. I leaned back against him and felt his hand slide down my hip to the front of my leggings, where he grasped my erection. I felt his own hardness pressing against my back.

Transfixed, we watched until the beasts finished their union and galloped off, the herd moving with them. I turned then and saw the glitter in Ki's eyes, and knew he saw the answer in mine. Did I want him? Right now? Oh, yes.

But then Ki said, "Let us..." and not having the words, reached around behind me, poking his finger between my buttocks. He meant penetration. I felt a slight flicker of fear. I knew that Ki would never deliberately hurt me, but as this was an act he'd never performed before, I couldn't help but be concerned.

He saw my hesitation and took my hand, pulling me to the ground. Then he got to his hands and knees facing away from me, and I realized it was to be me doing the penetrating. Still I hesitated, but he looked back over his shoulder, and the pleading in his eyes was something I couldn't resist.

I moved close behind him and opened up the rear of his skin breeches. Lubricant was obviously called for, but we had none with us. I stroked Ki's buttocks and thighs while I pondered the issue. Then I leaned down and gave a long lick. He shivered with surprise and pleasure. I set to work with my tongue, moving in circles around his anus, before probing directly. Ki's head hung down and he gasped faintly. I wasn't sure about the efficacy of saliva, but applied as much as I could to his entrance, probing with saliva-coated fingers, and then applied more saliva to my cock, which was straining with excitement.

He was moaning now and I could restrain myself no longer, but pushed into him as slowly as I could. He pushed back, wild with excitement, and soon we were completely joined.

I've never felt anything like it in my life, and can't say why this act of union seemed so much more complete than any others I'd experienced, but it was so. Perhaps I hurt Ki, I hope not, but we were wild then, out of control in our eagerness. On a grassy plain under an alien sun, we howled our pleasure and our passion.

And something more. Something unexpected. As we moved together, I felt Ki in my mind, offering himself to me. So beautiful, so entirely without artifice or self-interest! Without a moment's consideration, I grasped him eagerly, taking him to myself and giving him my own self in return.

It was only later, lying gasping on Ki's back, feeling the coolness of our sweat drying in the breeze, that I felt the change in circumstance and took the time to ponder what I had just done.

Bonded. I'd bonded, for life and beyond, to this strange wonderful man as unlike me as I was unlike the kradlik. What would become of us now?

Part V

We slept that night in the open air. Ki slept quickly and easily but I remained awake for some time, head pillowed on his chest, watching the stars.

On the surface of Coruscant, the stars are little visible. The planet-wide city created such light pollution that even the position in the galactic interior is overcome. But take to space and just above the Coruscant atmosphere you will see stars in abundance, a crowded, gaudy display of light.

The view is different in the Outer Rim. The galactic core, which fills the sky above Coruscant with overwhelming profusion, is here seen as a faint dusty banner across the night sky. Space is emptier here, and darker, distances greater, each individual star seeming of more importance.

I pondered a while on how my life had changed. Before arriving at Caloon, I had thought I had my life mapped out, with a fairly accurate notion of where I would be in each decade that passed. I would advance up the Jedi ladder, whether with methodical precision or meteoric rise. I had seen myself at thirty, at forty, at fifty, and always about the Temple or on missions for the Order and the Republic.

Now, I simply didn't know. The life that stretched before me was as blank and full of possibilities as an empty data cartridge.

My bonding with Ki would certainly complicate matters. Perhaps I should have discussed the issue with him, but I still lacked the words to explain to him what had happened between us. I couldn't claim that I hadn't intended the bonding; at the moment it occurred, I knew exactly what was happening and had the capacity to accept or reject it. And I accepted it.

Bondings were not unheard of, but they were rare, even among the Jedi. It was a thing to be entered into with great and solemn deliberation. And I'd never even heard of a Jedi bonding with someone not a Jedi. And Ki, however great a Force adept he was, was most certainly not a Jedi. Challenges lay ahead.

The next day, we continued around the mountain. Eventually, we came upon a river, running wide and shallow across the plain. We followed it, turning up its course and following it toward the mountain gap.

The valley between the mountains teemed with life. It was a temperate rain forest, thick with low-hanging trees, and the going was slow. We followed the river as it narrowed to a bubbling stream.

Ki pointed out plants as we went and explained, or tried to explain, what was the function and use of each. It seemed that useful herbs abounded here.

Eventually we crossed the stream, jumping from rock to rock and arriving on the other side still dry. We stopped for a bite to eat by the side of the stream, and then continued on our way. I had asked Ki several times where it was that we were going, but he insisted he hadn't the words for it.

Finally, in mid-afternoon, we reached our destination. So thick was the vegetation that I didn't see it until we were almost upon it, and even from close range I was puzzled as to what it was. A structure, a house? It was certainly some sort of man-made artifact snuggled overgrown in the dense forest.

Now we were close enough to touch it, and I ran my hand over the rust-colored metal, until we came to - a door! I took a step back, and looked in both directions on either side of the door. This was some sort of space craft!

Beside the door was lettering, faded with decades of weathering, but I thought I discerned Republic markings.

Ki palmed at the entry plate and the mechanism gave a groan, and the door slowly began to open. It opened only inches before coming to a halt with a grinding shriek. Ki was unperturbed and approached the door, pushing it back with great strain.

Finally he had it wide enough that a man could enter sideways. He slipped inside, gesturing me to follow. I followed into a dim central cabin.

Ki put his hand to the light switch, and we were afforded a low and flickering light. I looked around. The style of fixtures and furnishings led me to believe that this craft was at least half a century old. The floor was strewn with trash, leaves and sticks that had found their way to the interior, as well as scraps of rags and the debris of occupation. As I moved, I jumped slightly as my foot encountered something that gave a shrill squeak. I bent to examine it and straightened up with the object in my hand. It was a child's toy, some sort of animal with floppy ears. I pressed it and it squeaked again.

I can't describe my sense of the place, other than to say that it gave me a bad feeling. So desolate, so long without life that my footsteps echoed weirdly. Who had come here and what had been their fate? Ki stood silently beside the wall, allowing me to explore.

I approached a door at the back of the compartment, hesitated, and went through into a small cabin. By now I think I was almost expecting the two skeletons I found sharing their long repose on the bed.

The larger skeleton lay on its back, as if asleep, and the smaller one lay on its side, head to the larger's chest, arm around its shoulder.

The one surprise, which probably should not have been a surprise, given all that I knew, was the attire. The skeletons were robed as Jedi.

I went to one knee beside the bed and bowed my head. How long, I wondered, had they waited for the rescue that never came? Had they at least been able to see their son grow up?

But I knew the answer there must be no. There were no signs here of long habitation. These two had not lived long as residents of Caloon. I gave a sympathetic shiver, imagining a mother's terror, knowing that her son would soon be on his own, that she would not be allowed to defend him in a harsh and unforgiving world.

I cleared my throat and whispered, "You did well. He grew to be a fine man. The finest."

Then I jumped to my feet in alarm at the sound of a woman's voice. But the voice came not from the bed, but from the outer chamber. I hurried out and then forward to the cockpit, where Ki was seated in one of the pilot chairs watching a viewscreen.

The voice came from the viewscreen, where a lovely, dark-haired woman was saying, "Balar grows weaker daily, and nothing I have tried has alleviated the fever. I try to hope, but fear that soon I will be alone here with our Qui-Gon." Over the woman's shoulder, I could see a toddler seated on the floor, playing with a floppy-eared toy.

Ki leaned forward and gently stroked the viewscreen. "Mama," he whispered.

I swallowed the lump in my throat and stroked Ki's hair. He turned and smiled at me, taking my hand and kissing it. I pointed at him and then at the toddler on the viewscreen. "Qui-Gon?" I asked. He nodded. I pointed at the screen. "May I go back and watch it all?"

He nodded again, moving out of the seat. I slid into the pilot's chair and keyed the log to return to the beginning. Ki, Qui-Gon, sat on the floor beside me and put his head in my lap.

I stroked his hair, soothing both him and myself, as I absorbed the story. Balar Darkin and Mai-Ree Jinn were Jedi knights who had been on their way to a diplomatic posting, the sort of low-risk assignment that was often given to parents of young children. A space storm had damaged their craft after throwing them so far off course that they were well beyond the region a search party would think to look. With a disabled stardrive and smashed communications equipment, there was no way the family could either leave or call for help.

The parents had lasted for some months after the hard landing on Caloon's surface. Balar had been the first to die. A childee attack had been the culprit.

It was hard listening to the later log entries, as Mai-Ree tried to raise her son as quickly as she could. Knowing that he might soon be alone, she taught him everything she could about his Force abilities, teaching the three-year-old Force manipulation techniques that the Temple doesn't teach its initiates until their twelfth year. Mainly she concentrated on the physical aspects of the Force, to allow a youngster to survive in a hostile wilderness. My admiration for the poor woman was without bound.

The last entry was the most painful to hear. She knew she was dying. Her last words were, "Whoever finds this record, please ? find my Qui-Gon, take care of my little Ki."

I looked down at the head on my lap. Ki had fallen asleep. I stroked his hair gently, wishing I could tell Mai-Ree that her little Ki had grown into a huge, powerful and magnificent beast. I didn't know if 'taking care' was what I was doing, but I would care for him all my life.

Ki blinked his eyes and smiled up at me. I gestured at the blank screen. "Thank you," I told him. "For allowing me to see this."

"I wanted you to see it," he said. "I want you to know all about me. So that you'll remember me after you leave."

I was too astonished to speak. After I leave? Did he still believe - ? I reviewed the conversations we'd had following my return from the campsite, and realized that I'd only uttered soothing words about how everything would be alright.

But yesterday! I warmed at the memory of our joining on the plain. Now I was astonished at the realization that Ki had given himself with such wholehearted generosity to a man he thought would be leaving soon. I felt a lump in my throat and swallowed with difficulty. I knew I couldn't possibly deserve such a love, but then, who could?

I leaned down and kissed Ki gently on the lips. "I won't leave you," I told him positively. "Not ever."

Ki gave a wild cry of delight and pulled me onto the floor and into his arms. He covered my face with kisses. Eventually he paused, burying his face in my neck. "You'll stay here?" he asked.

"The choice is yours," I told him. "We could stay here. Or you could come with me to my home."

This was a new concept for Ki. He pulled his head back and stared into my face. "Your home. Where is that?"

"It's called Coruscant," I told him. "The Jedi Temple. It's where your parents were from. Where you are from, though I don't suppose you remember it."

He was frowning with concentration. "Coruscant," I said again. "My home, and your home long ago. We could go there, if you wish."

"This is where you planned to return?" he asked.

"Yes."

"Then... Then we will go there," Ki said decisively.

I hugged him tight. I was truly willing to remain here with Ki, if that was his choice. But to return with him felt right to me. Home to Coruscant, to the Jedi. No, Ki was not a Jedi, but he should have been.

We returned to our home on the mountain and I began to teach Ki in earnest. I knew that we had little time before the Jedi came. Unlike when Ki's parents were lost, the Order knew the planet and the general area where their missing knight was last seen. It wouldn't be long before a party came in search of me.

While Mai-Ree had concentrated on teaching Ki to survive on his own, my emphasis was on how to get along in groups, groups of Jedi in particular. Ki was puzzled on my insistence on clothing, and I didn't have the heart to insist that he wear clothes when we were alone together. But on Coruscant, I repeated, one didn't leave one's residence without wearing coverings of some sort, generally quite voluminous.

"Is it so cold?" Ki asked.

"No, it's not cold at all," I replied. "It's a matter of modesty."

Another word Ki didn't know. I tried again. "We cover our genitals so those with smaller ones won't feel bad when they see the larger ones."

Ki nodded thoughtfully. Then he asked, "Would I feel bad, if everyone didn't go covered?"

I laughed and hugged him. "No, Ki, you would be the one making all the others feel bad."

"I wouldn't want to make other people feel bad," Ki said. "I will wear these coverings. On Coruscant."

I tried to introduce the concept of mental shielding, but either I was a poor teacher or we still lacked the vocabulary to deal with such an abstract concept. I hoped the teachers at the Temple would be willing to train a new student in late middle age, and had the uneasy feeling that the Temple grounds were going to reel under the impact of my bondmate's vibrancy.

And then the expected day arrived. From the clearing in front of the cave, I looked through the trees to the plain and saw a large party making its slow way toward our mountain. Though still distant I could see several figures in brown robes and knew that the Jedi had arrived. "They're here!" I called to Ki, and he came beside me to watch.

I stood on a large rock and signaled with my lightsaber to give the party both my location and my status. All Jedi learned basic lightsaber signaling, and I waved my saber in the configuration that indicated that I was safe and all was well.

Then, knowing we had hours yet until the group arrived, we went into the cave to pack the items that Ki would want to take with him to his new life. He dressed himself in his skin garments without complaint, and I was touched at his thoughtfulness, not wanting others to feel bad.

When the search party finally reached us, I almost laughed to see the toughness of the group sent to find me. Old Even Piell was in command and four battle-hardened knights accompanied him. One knight had already vanished into the domain of the Spirit of the Mountain, and the Order was not going to lose any more if it could help it.

I waved to Piell and the others, bowing as they approached. "Master Piell," I said formally. "My apologies for putting the Order to the trouble of fetching me, but I am unharmed as you see. My circumstances have changed however, and I would welcome a return berth to Coruscant with my companion."

Ki joined us then, magnificent in skins and fur, and my heart swelled with pride as he put his hands together and bowed slightly to Piell, saying in a gentle voice, "I am Qui-Gon Jinn."

THE END