Spit It Out

by Wednesday (grave_tidings@yahoo.com)

ARCHIVE: MA
DISCLAIMERS: Lucas owns the universe. I just annoy it.
RATING: G
PAIRING: You and the Jedi
NOTE: This was inspired (or damned) by Pennywhistle's sardonic comment: "This is like watching the Titanic go down, only this time it's because a few disgruntled passengers have been boring holes underneath."

[insert anything I've forgotten here]

The author (pick an author, any author) held out her hand, palm up. "Spit it out."

Obi-Wan chewed frantically for a few more seconds, then spat the wad of pink bubble gum into the woman's hand.

"Well done, Padawan," said Qui-Gon Jinn, famed (and infamous), handsome, sexy, tall, dark and deliriously delectable Jedi Master, soulbonded and eternally aroused by his Padawan. Unfortunately, he had so much gum in his mouth, it came out closer to "Wohl dun pa-uh- *choke*."

Ignoring the two Jedi, one of which was stuffing new great gobs of bubble gum between his teeth and knowing he would need to see the Temple dentist pronto when they got back to the Temple, the author shoved the soggy, spit-laden, highly sticky, more-effective-than-your-average-towel wad of gum into the nearest bored (and boring) hole in the hull of the HMS Masterapprentice.

"There. That's one." She held out her hand to Qui-Gon, narrowly missed swatting his luscious broken nose. "Spit it out."

"Nooo!" he said with much indignation. Splatting the gum into the palm of his own hand, he glowered at the author before slapping the slimy sealant across the next hole.

Large fingers worked to clog up the bothersome aperture. Devastatingly adorable Obi-Wan of the perfectly clefted chin, the illegal-in-three-galaxies "Damn, but I'm Good(tm)" walk, forced more gum upon his hapless master, who opened his mouth and chewed with solemn dignity.

"Two down, a few more to go!" the author crowed.

Was it her imagination, or was there a little less sloshing water in the hull now? Were they a little more closer to going back to their comfy cabins, curling up and outlining yet another 100-page story for their buddies on MA? She thought they just might be.

And the Jedi chewed on.