ARCHIVE: M_A if you want it, and
http://www.slashcity.com/ciceqi/SWS3.htm
PAIRING: Q/O slash
CATEGORY: First Time, Humor
RATING: PG? for implied m/m sexual situation.
DISCLAIMER: There's a Lucas who's sure / All that glitters is
gold / And we're buying him a stairway / To heaven...
WARNINGS: Questionable humor.
SPOILERS: None. Takes place preTPM.
NOTES: Destroying clichés is my favorite hobby...
SUMMARY: "Blue morning, blue day...won't you see things my
way?"
FEEDBACK: Keeps me off the street and out of the chocolate
aisle.
Qui-Gon swam up reluctantly into consciousness, certain his
memories from the night before had been just a dream--but there
was an undeniable warmth beside him, one he had curled around
instinctively, and the hair his face was buried in smelled
distinctly of sunlight and honey.
Obi-Wan. It hadn't been a dream after all.
Smiling, he opened his eyes, pulling back just enough to see
the auburn-gold braid still wound around his fist, his arm
curled around Obi-Wan's shoulder. He was spooned up to his
Padawan's back, leg thrown over strong, muscular thighs, and it
felt so good to be here like this, so right, so...dangerous,
because neither one of them had been quite in their right minds
the night before, and he had no idea if this was real. They had
been riding the emotional high of escaping a battle unscathed,
of ending a war, and bottle after bottle of the deceptively
strong local spirits had flowed before they staggered back to
their borrowed rooms and...
Most of the night was a blur now. He distinctly remembered
Obi-Wan breathing: "I've never done this before" in his
ear, though the other man had been almost outrageously
inventive in bed. No blushing virgin, his Padawan might not
have had a male partner before, but there had obviously been
women in his life determined to teach him the ropes. And the
chains and the toys and the proper ice cube techniques.
At the same time...he and his apprentice had been drunk. There
was no getting around that fact, however much he wanted to
rationalize it, and he simply couldn't know for sure whether
this had been what Obi-Wan would have chosen if he'd been
sober. All he could do was wait until Obi-Wan woke...
With a faint groan, his Padawan did just that, pressing back
into him with a sleepy mumble Qui-Gon couldn't interpret. It
didn't sound like Basic, anyway...which was strange, when he
thought about it. Who did Obi-Wan think he was in bed with,
anyway?
Apparently, the thought had occurred to Obi-Wan, as well.
Qui-Gon sensed his apprentice's troubled confusion as a
disturbance in the Force around them, and he steeled himself as
Obi-Wan opened his eyes with a frown. Tipping his head back
slowly, Obi-Wan's eyes went wide with horror when he saw his
Master there behind him, and Qui-Gon sat up hastily, untangling
his fingers from his Padawan's braid as his heart broke inside
him.
"Master?" Obi-Wan squeaked, grabbing for the sheets and
yanking them up to his shoulders.
"Forgive me, Padawan," Qui-Gon said gravely, swallowing his
hurt and his pride. "I'm afraid we weren't...ourselves last
night, but the fault is mine. I...never wished to cause you any
pain, believe me..."
"No, I mean...it's...I'm not...you didn't...oh, Force," Obi-Wan
babbled, shock still a white hiss behind his huge eyes. "I
mean, you're..."
"Your Master," Qui-Gon nodded painfully.
"No, you're a..."
"Jedi?" Qui-Gon frowned.
"Human!" Obi-Wan wailed, hunching down even further
beneath the sheet. "I've never...not with a...Sith, I can't
believe I...did...that..."
"Excuse me?" Qui-Gon blinked, his head starting to hurt as
confusion crept up and coldcocked him. "You're upset because
I'm a human? Well, what did you think I was?"
"You mean what do I usually...?" Obi-Wan smiled nervously. When
Qui-Gon nodded firmly, Obi-Wan shrugged, his fingers loosening
just slightly on the edges of the sheet. "Well, there's
Wookies...Ewoks...droids sometimes, Wampas--they're a lot
smarter than they look--and there's this fellow in the lower
levels that says he's a Gungan--you would not believe
what he can do with his tongue--"
"All right, all right, I get the picture," Qui-Gon protested,
not sure what to make of the dreamy expression his
Padawan was wearing right now. "If you'll forgive me for
asking...what exactly do you see in these...partners?"
"Well...I mean, it's....they're..."
"Novel?"
"No, I mean the sex...it's..."
"Interesting?"
"Kinky," Obi-Wan decided, smiling as if pleased with himself.
Perhaps he was--Qui-Gon rather doubted anyone had ever asked
Obi-Wan to explain his romantic life before now. Probably, no
one else had wanted to know.
"Kinky," Qui-Gon repeated slowly. "You like sex with aliens
because it's kinky."
"I guess so, Master...don't you ever get tired of being the
straight-laced Jedi all the time?" Obi-Wan asked curiously,
relaxing further when there was no ridicule forthcoming from
his Master.
"Well...yes, but..." He was going to say that he could think of
rather...different ways to express himself than finding out
what a Gungan could do with his tongue, but another thought
struck him just in time. "Let me get this straight. You feel
stifled by the rigid structure of the Code, so to preserve a
sense of freedom, you seek out alien persons and engage in
sex--"
"Kinky sex," Obi-Wan corrected helpfully.
"--kinky sex with them? Have you ever considered kinky sex with
humans, Padawan?"
"Well...human sex just isn't that kinky."
//I beg to differ,// Qui-Gon sniffed to himself, but he was
constructing a trap here, and the bait was on its way. "What
about kinky Jedi sex?"
"Jedi have kinky sex?" Obi-Wan demanded, his eyes brightening
with curiosity.
"Well," Qui-Gon said slowly, as if considering the matter
carefully. "Let's start out fairly tame, shall we? Like for
instance, you and me. I'm your Master--I've shaped your life,
every moment of it, since the day I entered your world.
Whatever you were before, you're mine now, heart and soul. I
own you. I made you. I'm your father, your
brother, your teacher, the reason the sun shines down on you in
the morning. Who are you to say no if I decide I want to bend
you over and fuck that pretty ass of yours?"
"Oh, Master," Obi-Wan breathed, the sheet falling away
as he sat up and launched himself at Qui-Gon. "Tell me
more...please..."
Qui-Gon's mouth, however, was far too busy as his Padawan
devoured him, ripping away the sheet and grinding himself
against Qui-Gon with a passion that surprised them both.
//Well,// Qui-Gon smiled happily to himself, //it looks like
this won't be such a bad morning after all...//
And he was definitely looking forward to introducing his
Padawan to kinky human Jedi sex.
Archive 