Master Apprentice
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Chapter II: When You're Not Around
The night before had been calm and uneventful for Obi-Wan as he kept his word to take full responsibility of keeping watch on the senator while Anakin slept. Padme came to greet both of her protectors as she crept from the comfort of her room, dressed in a lavish nightgown. Upon catching Anakin sleeping against his Master, Padme cooed as she bent down to admire Anakin peacefully asleep. "So cute. Does he always look this cute when he's asleep?" she whispered as one of her small hands came to brush against Anakin's cheek.
Obi-Wan seemed to scoff at her gesture, but swallowed the bitter taste in his mouth. "I suppose he does." he replied, that bile of jealously rising from his stomach and burning his esophagus. Even more so when Padme went to lift Anakin's legs and sit on the other side of the sofa and bring his legs to rest on her lap. Obi-Wan, at this point, was seriously considering draping his arm over Anakin's chest to show her that Anakin was his. Right about now, he was feeling threatened by Padme; she had only spent a mere day with Anakin and already, she was trying to steal him from Obi-Wan, who had spent eight years with him. She had no right. I knew this was a bad idea... Kenobi said to himself, his fingers tapping nervously against the sofa's arm rest.
Master Kenobi, being attuned to Anakin's presence for so long, could sense the boy starting to awaken. He looked down and seen Anakin's weight shifting on the sofa. A pleased smile came to his lips upon noticing that his Padawan's eyes had fluttered open.
"Is it morning already?" said the boy dryly as he rubbed his heavy eyes.
"Yes it is, Anakin. How did you sleep?" Kenobi replied in a whisper. Anakin snuggled deeply against Obi-Wan's waist and hummed in his throat.
"Well. Thank you Master. No nightmares." he smiled and propped himself on his elbows to kiss Obi-Wan's chin when he noticed Padme sitting on the other side of the sofa, with a pleased look on her face. Anakin immediately backed off and came to sit up, feeling somewhat crunched in between Obi-Wan and Padme.
"Morning Ani." she grinned cheerfully.
"Good morning, Padme." he replied, stifling a yawn. Anakin shifted his legs from off of Padme's lap and came to plant his feet on the floor as his body leaned back into the sofa. It was then, as he stretched himself out, that Padme turned her attention to Obi-Wan, hoping a decision had been made.
"Master Kenobi. Have you came to a decision regarding your apprentice?"
Obi-Wan's eyebrows knitted together at the senator's question. Indeed, she was just as pushy as any other politician. He nearly spat at her remark. "I was planning on training with Anakin in the Jedi Temple; he has a very important day of training. Do forgive me but, are you certain this whole story about an assassin being after you isn't...a figment of your imagination? You seem to be more concerned with spending time with my apprentice than you do about this suspect who is after you."
Padme hopped to her feet, outraged with Obi-Wan's accusations of her assassination attempt being nothing more than a figurehead for the real reason she was here. "Master Kenobi, I am appalled by your suspicion! How dare you accuse me of such a childish game?"
Kenobi's tone thickened. He was growing quite irritated by the senator and her conniving ways by now. "We were given strict orders by the Council to protect you and investigate this threat that's after you. You must understand something Padme. Anakin is my apprentice and I am his Master. You cannot just come here and think you are entitled to his company by right. Do I make myself clear?"
Padme felt herself shrink just a little by Obi-Wan's stern voice and demeanor but quickly rebounded. "Anakin is not your slave, Master Kenobi, and should not be treated as such. I hope you will reconsider your decision." Then, she headed back to her bedroom and closed the door. Obi-Wan began to pace back and forth, his robes dancing behind him. Anakin merely looked at him, sensed the conflict in his soul, and proceeded to stand.
"Clear your mind, Master." Anakin advised softly, his arm elongated to one side as if to catch his distressed Master into his embrace. Obi-Wan warmed against his apprentice's body as he calmed himself. With his eyes closed, he allowed his mind to drift away from the conflict and embrace passivity. He would just drift here in Anakin's arms.
"Anakin..." Kenobi said against the shoulder of his apprentice. "Do forgive me." Skywalker buried his face into Obi-Wan's thick mane of hair and inhaled, his hands caressing the back of his Master.
"I'm here. I forgive you Master. You mustn't concern yourself with the past." said the teenager soothingly, wisely, almost as though he was a Master calming his apprentice. A smile danced across Anakin's handsome face, his chin rested softly against the top of Obi-Wan's head. Then, he felt Obi-Wan break away and his eyes on him. He looked pleased to say the least and this warmed Anakin's heart.
"You have learned much, Anakin. I can see that. Everything you encounter makes up a little bit of your Jedi training. Be aware. Now, let us go back to the Temple. Your lesson awaits." Obi-Wan patted Anakin on the shoulder and smiled as they prepared to exit the senator's apartment when she suddenly stormed out of her room. Obi- Wan and Anakin turned to face her, noticing the little time she spent in private had calmed her so.
"Do forgive me for the way I have acted, Master Kenobi. It's not in my nature. I've just been fretful and feel myself vulnerable to anything around me. That is why I called upon your Padawan. I wish him to be my bodyguard until this investigation has concluded successfully."
Obi-Wan tucked his hands into the baggy sleeves of his cloak and stepped forward, looking pleased with Padme's presentation, and kindly addressed her. "Your concerns for your safety are warranted and just. If it is an escort you desire, my Padawan should prove to be of some assurance to you. Anakin?" Kenobi motioned behind him with his hand for Skywalker to step forward. "Senator Amidala has requested your assistance. You will be trusted alone in protecting her until further notice. Are you willing to accept?" he asked.
"Yes Master. I will protect the senator. But...what about my training?" Anakin asked, feeling dumbfounded and confused. His confusion seemed to rouse a smile from Obi-Wan.
"This is part of your training, my apprentice. You will serve as Padme's escort for the time being; I will take care of the investigation."
And so it was decided, just like that. The swift turn of events had boggled Anakin's mind. Instead of accompanying his Master in the investigation like he planned, he was now assigned to being Padme's escort around the city, her protector. It was enough to make him protest. And he would have done so, if not for his determination to not let down his Master. He craved so much more than this. He craved the thrill of a mission, and the testing of his skills. But most of all, he craved the familiar company of his Master. But now, they would be apart. And already, with Obi-Wan still standing next to him, Anakin felt pained by the inevitable separation that was to come. Obi- Wan was so close to him and yet he would be far, far away from him very soon. If only Anakin had a way to slow or even stop time from flowing. That way, he would never have to be away from his Master. But how the reality of it all crushed his dreams for longevity with his beloved Master who he was growing to love in a deeper way. He would have to do as he was told, regardless of personal feelings or reservations.
Anakin learned some hours later that Obi-Wan would be venturing to Padme's homeworld of Naboo after he received word from the Queen that Amidala's suspected assassin was spotted in the capital city of Theed by Royal Guards. As he prepared to board his Jedi Starfighter in the hidden hangar of the Temple, he felt the familiar tug of Anakin's hand against his robes, pulling at him.
"Please Master...don't go." he said with a pained look in his eyes. He felt like a child again, leaving the side of his mother for the first time. And while her words of urging her son to be brave and don't look back had helped in the past, they were all but silent now. Anakin felt vulnerable. But he didn't care if Padme was only a few steps away, watching the tragedy of an apprentice and his Master parting. Anakin's pain birthed itself in the form of a lone tear, trickling down his cheek. All his pain and fear held behind that small tear. Master Kenobi brought one finger to Anakin's cheek and brushed away the lone symbol of sadness.
"I will return, my young Padawan. I promise. Lest your tears from falling. I will return." he whispered and nearly kissed his apprentice on the lips before restraining himself. Anakin nodded and took a few steps back to watch his Master board his starfighter. And within moments, Obi-Wan was no more.
Obi-Wan had been gone for only a few hours. Most likely, he was already to Naboo and meeting with the Queen about Padme's assassin by now. Or, Anakin could only hope his Master's trip had gone that smoothly. Though, he knew he could never confide in Padme about how much Kenobi meant to him, how much he was worrying about his safety. Their bond had became more than just Master and Apprentice. It ran much deeper than that and while Anakin didn't notice it earlier, having been in the company of Obi-Wan, right now he wished he would have been aware of the bond they shared. Amidala could never understand such complex matters, even if she was an intelligent soul. There were just some things in life that weren't meant to be understood, only accepted.
"Are you okay Anakin?" asked Padme as they sat quietly in her apartment watching the flow of Coruscant traffic outside.
Skywalker stood to rid himself of his cloak and sat back down, a heavy sigh escaped him. I can't tell her. Oh, Master...if only you were here. Anakin said to himself as his eyes forced Padme into view. "It's nothing. Don't worry about it. So...what's happened since the last time we seen each other last?" Anakin asked. He shook his head with embarrassment. He never thought of himself to be a captivating conversationalist. In fact, when it came down to it, he was quite shy and let his Master do most of the talking. And Padme's flirtatious looks were not helping the situation any. Clearly, she had moved closer to Anakin, her hand within range of touching his knee, one arm draped lazily on the back of the sofa.
"Well, after the unification of my people and the Gungans, my term as Queen came to a close shortly afterward. But the government told me to seriously reconsider and run for another term. But I declined and decided to serve as a representative for my people. The Galactic Senate seemed like the best place to do that. I've served in the senate for about six years now."
Anakin smiled faintly, his mind in another dimension, one where he and Obi-Wan could be together without having to worry about violating the Jedi Code. He could have cared less about Padme's past. Padme placed one of her small and delicate hands on Anakin's shoulder, closer to him now and gazed into his eyes.
Anakin swallowed hard, feeling his adrenaline beginning to flow. He tried to scoot back, away from her, but was at the brink of the sofa as it was and could not push his back any further. "Please,don't look at me like that Padme." Anakin said, his lungs felt tight as he tried to breathe away his tension. But Padme only came closer to Anakin, now running her fingers through his hair and along his Padawan braid, and came to claim his lips in a forbidden kiss. "Is this your idea of protection? Getting me alone so you could flirt with me?" Anakin asked with an unpleasant look in his eyes. Padme backed off suddenly.
"I'm sorry." she apologized. Her eyes told Anakin differently. Much, much, differently.
"Your eyes say otherwise. I'm beginning to think Obi-Wan was right to have his suspicions about your reason for coming here. You used Master Kenobi to get to me, didn't you? And this whole story about you and this assassin was just a lie, wasn't it?!" Anakin said, furious. He was standing now.
"Maybe I was wrong about you, Anakin. Your not the same little boy I remember. Tell me, is it normal for a Jedi Master to brainwash his apprentice?" Padme replied, getting right up in Anakin's face. She had struck a tender nerve inside of the Padawan; his eyebrows furrowed, his expressions constantly shifted back and forth between hurt, pain, and anger.
Anakin jolted his fist at the remark. "That's because I'm not a little boy anymore, damn it! I've grown up! And you...you take that back - you haven't the slightest fucking clue about any of this!! How dare you say something like that?!" And with no way to cope with the burden, Anakin bolted from her apartment in a heated rage.
Back at the Jedi Temple, Anakin sat alone in his quarters and was deeply meditating on trying to reach his Master for some comfort. Talking with Obi-Wan would ease his pain, it always did. At least that was one thing he could trust in. Every other rug seemed to be pulled from under his feet. With the Force humming around him lightly, Anakin felt the presence of his Master, reaching out to him from Naboo.
"Anakin...you are not well?"
"No, Master. Your absence has left a painful scar on my heart. I...I miss you."
Then, as if Obi-Wan was sitting right next to him, Anakin felt warm suddenly, and wrapped in something strong and unyielding. "Do not worry, my Ani. I am with you. Can you feel it?" Obi-Wan asked, the sheer tone of his voice warmed Anakin to the bone.
"I can. Master...don't go. Stay with me a little longer." Pleaded the boy as he tried to reach out and hold Obi-Wan in his arms. His head suddenly felt weighed down with the gentle pressing of a phantom touch against his hair. Fingers, combing through it gently.
"I will never be very far away from you, my apprentice. We are bonded by the Force. I will stay with you." Anakin fell asleep some moments later.
Anakin found himself in a different room a few hours later. Night had fallen over the planet-wide city and the many lights filled the sky like stars. Anakin sat up and shook his head. He allowed his eyes to adjust accordingly to the darkness around him, but didn't proceed to move from the bunk he was on. What had happened? Was he truly awake? Merely dreaming? And where was Obi-Wan? I hope he's all right. Anakin thought to himself as he felt his feet touch the floor. Finally some stability.
"I am..." said an accented voice from the infinite darkness. Anakin tried to squint for a clear view of whatever was replying to him, but the room window louvers were keeping him from doing so. The Padawan's heart beat quickened as he became a little uneasy.
"Who's there?" he called to the speaking darkness. The darkness suddenly shifted and looked to be stepping forward.
"Search your feelings..." said the voice calmly. Anakin closed his eyes, his intuition guiding him, then, as he came to open his eyes, "Master Kenobi." he said, breathless. The room suddenly lit up. Obi-Wan was standing directly in front of his Padawan and looking down upon him.
"I've returned, my Ani." said Anakin's Master as he came to sit next to him on his bunk. Anakin, overcome with emotion, engulfed Obi- Wan's lips in heated pleasure. Anakin felt the warmth and comfort of his Master's hands upon his chest.
"Shhh, hush, young Padawan. I am with you." Obi-Wan whispered with his lips and tongue licking and nibbling at Anakin's ear. Then, his hands found their way underneath the many layers of Anakin's thick robes until feeling nothing but the smoothness of his chest underneath his fingertips. Skywalker purred with urgency, and eclipsed his Master's hand with his own. Together, they traced along the fine contours of Anakin's chest, Obi-Wan's other hand had began pealing away the many layers of fabric covering his apprentice. Then, he allowed his tongue to lap at one side of Anakin's strong neck all the way down to his collar bone which he grazed with his teeth. Anakin hissed through his teeth, his hips involuntarily buckling, blood pounding in his ears.
"Obi-Wan...Master, please..." he said softly, feeling his throat constrict. Kenobi laid his apprentice down on his bunk, having removed his leather over-tunic and a few robes. He was getting closer to the core in which he wanted to taste. Likewise, Anakin also managed to remove some of his Master's robes, inching closer to his flesh. Intensely, they ceased the moving of their hands and gazed into each other's eyes.
It was all a dream... Nothing but a fantasy his mind had conjured up in order to quiet his pain. Anakin awoke to find himself alone, a prisoner of the darkness. The sun was setting and with it, his dreams of Obi-Wan. But it felt so real. Anakin told himself as he came to sit up on his bed. Master...you were here. I felt you. Surely I cannot be wrong...or can I? Anakin searched his mind and his feelings for the answer. But with his mind clouded and unable to clear itself of the fog, he could not see clearly and came up with no answers to his question.
He closed his eyes for a moment as he stood by his window, a painted canvas of lights and the warmth of the setting sun in front of him. Calm, beautiful silence. How it eased him so. Had he been dreaming? Was it a vision of things to come? Or, perhaps it was merely a stimulant for the pain that ached within him. He could never remember having never been apart from his Master; and the few times he was, Obi-Wan stayed in contact with him through comm link. Now, however, Kenobi was nowhere to be found. And Anakin could only hope that all was well. Sighing, the boy turned his back to the window, unsure of what to do next.
It's funny how time changes people. I can remember when you first took me on as your Padawan. The first time you braided my hair - my Padawan braid was so short, that you cut off yours and tied half of it to my braid, making it look longer and not so pitiful looking.
`It will grow in time, Anakin.'
You said that to me after I asked about it and looked at myself in the mirror. I can remember not wanting to wait for it to grow. I wanted one just like yours.
`You will have one in time, my Padawan. Until then, the modification will do just fine.'
You were good at verbally calming my impatience. You reminded me of Qui-Gon and deep down inside - though you would never tell me outright - I think you wanted to make him proud and train me just as good as he trained you.
Anakin continued his walk from his quarters toward the Temple's meditation chambers, continuing to reflect on the early days when he was a mere child.
I can remember when I had to build my own lightsaber. I was 15 and learning much from you. And you were feeling more and more like the father I never had, and so much more. When I returned from the Ilum trial with the crystals needed for my saber, I never seen you so proud of me in your life. I'll never forget that look of fatherly pride you had on your face. That's when my opinions about your demeanor began to change. You seemed so serious all the time, so focused on the moment. But after that day, you seemed to open up to me and become more than just my Master. You were becoming an object of my affection...
Anakin suddenly stopped a few feet short of the meditation chamber doorway, and turned his head toward the darkening horizon and noticed how the moon and sky seemed to be in perfect balance with one another.
I can say that now. But back then, I didn't have a clue about the strange feelings that would flicker in my heart from time to time. But now that I'm older, I understand what those feelings were and why they came out of nowhere. I understand it now. It's because I love you. And if the Council were to find out about this we would surely be separated forever. But I cannot hide my feelings anymore. Master, I love you and will risk it all to be with you.
Anakin returned his attention to the double doors in front of him and walked inside of the meditation chamber, a garden-like place with waterfalls and fountains and flowers. Obi-Wan knew how much Anakin loved them so. And one day, he once proclaimed, he would take Anakin to a place where only the bluest and clearest of waterfalls and the most elegant of flowers caressed the earth and converged to create a paradise. But it seemed like some far off dawn, a sliver of a future that was still uncertain. But it was enough to keep the young man running. Anakin sat among a flat rock and bed of purple flowers, cross-legged, and meditating.
"Anakin...I love you." said a voice through the Force.
"Master?"
"I heard everything you said. Do forgive me for intruding but I overheard your thoughts while I was trying to contact you. Hope you don't mind."
Anakin smiled. "I can't keep anything hidden from you can I? Always on the prowl."
Master Kenobi and his Padawan laughed in unison at Anakin's humor.
"Anakin...just because I'm not there with you in person, doesn't mean I'm not there. I can feel you. And I am there with you. All you have to do is quiet your mind and you'll find me...waiting for you."
It was much easier said than done. Anakin scoffed a little, wishing that were so. "But how can I quiet my mind, knowing that there is so much division inside of me, Master? I feel...lost."
"You must let go of your divisions, Anakin, and focus on the moment. But, you must also be mindful of the future, but not at the cost of the present. I know that sounds like hypocrisy, but in time you will come to understand. And, do not feel lost, my young apprentice. You will learn your place."
Suddenly, Anakin felt a brief puff of wind tussle his braid and then, a feeling of lips pressed against his cheek, and moving towards his lips. "Master...don't go. I need you." he breathed, feeling his body tingling. His lips were then claimed in a phantom kiss - a kiss from his Master.
"I must, my Ani. I will return to you, I promise."
And soon afterward, Obi-Wan's presence was no longer felt by Anakin. He was alone again. Just him and the void that threatened to swallow him whole.
"Anakin is that you?" came a soft voiced from the other side of the chamber. Anakin looked up for a moment, his meditation broken. It was none other than Padme. She had came here to look for him. He cursed at himself and tasted the bitterness of seeing her again in his mouth. Brushing himself off, the conflicted Padawan Learner came to stand and slowly approached the senator.
"Why are you here?" he asked boldly.
"I just came to apologize for the way I acted earlier. I didn't mean to hurt you Anakin, really. I know how much you want to be a Jedi - I don't know what came over me. I guess I was just expecting you to feel the same way about me as I do you. I'm sorry."
Anakin was taken aback at Padme's confession. And while she didn't say it outright, she had in fact confessed to Anakin that she was in love with him. In love with him? How can that be? he asked himself. They had been apart for eight, long years and had only reunited recently. How could she be in love with him? Anakin could only speculate. "How can you say that when we only reunited until recently? Love does not materialize in an instant. It takes time, and understanding. And don't think I'm going to forgive you over the things you said about me and Master Obi-Wan. It's not your place to judge."
"That may be true for some, but I know what I want. I'm in love with you Anakin. And I'm willing to do anything to be with you. Please try to understand."
Skywalker turned his back to her sharply as her words gnawed at him like the maggots they were. Corrupt, slimy maggots just waiting to be crushed by his love of another, one Padme knew of as merely a friend and Master to his Padawan, but was so much more to Anakin Skywalker. The one he missed so much that it was literally killing him from the inside out. Anakin had to take control if he was to make it out of here alive. "NO!!! I WILL NOT!!!" he yelled in an angry tone of voice as he spun around and headed as fast as he could to the chamber doors. It was his only chance for release. Quickly, he ran down what seemed like an endless corridor of the Temple, not having a pre-determined course set in his mind. He would let his feelings and the Force guide him. The Force would bring he and Obi-Wan together.
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