Recovery

by Marie (dmbennet@hotmail.com)

Summary: With Qui-Gon's help, Obi-Wan struggles through a difficult recovery.

Rating: PG

Category: H/C, Angst, Pre-slash

Disclaimer: The Jedi do not belong to me. I make no money from this.

Archive: Feel free. Let me know where.

How many times had he done this, now? The days were beginning to blend together. Qui-Gon finished plaiting the last of his padawan's braid and tied it off. He fingered the colored threads for a moment and let the braid slide through his hand as he laid it gently on Obi-Wan's chest. Obi-Wan sat in a chair in their common room, not moving, not speaking.

His padawan had been unresponsive for days. Obi-Wan's kidnappers had kept him heavily drugged during the weeks of his captivity, injecting him daily with high doses of an illegal and extremely addictive substance. When Qui-Gon had finally tracked down his apprentice, Obi-Wan was delirious and weak, unable to support his own weight.

Qui-Gon shuddered as he recalled the torture Obi-Wan endured during his withdrawal. It had been a different kind of torture for Qui-Gon, as he held his shivering, sweating apprentice and heard his inarticulate pleas for help. He had tried his best to calm Obi-Wan when hallucinations terrified him, causing panicked attempts to escape the circle of his master's arms. There had been nothing more Qui-Gon could do but wait out the torment with Obi-Wan and try to soothe the mental and physical pain.

By the time the Temple transport had finally arrived to take them off the planet, the worst of the withdrawal was over. But Obi-Wan had gone from wild, delirious panic into a deep sleep followed by this unresponsive, nearly catatonic state.

Qui-Gon had insisted on caring for his apprentice himself. At first he had been constantly looking for and anticipating signs of improvement, but as the days wore on none were to be found. The healers made daily visits and assured him there was no physical damage. Obi-Wan's body was fine, it just wasn't responding to the messages his brain was sending. He would recover, but the speed and extent of his recovery were up to Obi-Wan.

Every evening Qui-Gon exercised and loosened Obi-Wan's muscles, moving his arms and legs gently but firmly to help him stay limber and retain some muscle tone. Then the Jedi Master would feed and bathe his student and re-braid his hair, all the while talking to Obi-Wan, telling him of the day's events, speaking of past missions, and holding one-sided discussions of anything from Code philosophy to the aesthetic qualities of the evening meal.

Qui-Gon smoothed his padawan's still-damp hair and smiled as he looked into his eyes. Those beautiful eyes, usually so expressive and quick to light up at the sight of his master, were dim and unfocused. Qui-Gon would give anything to be able to have a real conversation with his bright, charming student. And their bond was so quiet. "Obi-Wan, come back to me," he whispered. "I miss you."

Obi-Wan was in hell. He had only the dimmest recollection of his captivity - hazy, jumbled, confused impressions of injections, pointless interrogations, and his captors' humiliating laughter at his panic-stricken, illogical reactions to his hallucinations.

He had somewhat clearer memories of his terrifying withdrawal and the mental and physical anguish which accompanied it. He felt he would have died had Qui-Gon not been with him. He had wanted to die - had wished for it. Thankfully, the symptoms had eased and, exhausted, he had fallen into a deep but troubled sleep.

He woke to a whole new kind of captivity. Qui-Gon was there, smiling at him, welcoming him back, squeezing Obi-Wan's hand in reassurance. Obi-Wan wanted to respond, to smile back at his master, to thank him for saving him and taking care of him. But he could not. It was as if his mind existed somewhere besides this body on the bed. Obi-Wan could think, he could feel, he desperately wanted to respond to his master, but he could not. He watched as Qui-Gon's expression changed from joyous relief to sudden anxiety.

In the days since his awakening Obi-Wan's own fear and anxiety had grown. The frustration was nearly unbearable. Certain things were automatic - breathing, blinking, swallowing. But deliberate movement and speech were beyond him. Obi-Wan could access his training bond - could sense his master's unshielded thoughts and emotions, but could not send a message of any kind. He listened as Qui-Gon spoke endlessly with him on matters both trivial and significant. He formulated answers to his master's questions, generated clear, logical points for philosophical debate, and thought up his usual sarcastic comments and bad jokes designed to make Qui-Gon grimace, but was utterly unable to communicate them.

Tonight his master had given him his usual workout, slowly bending and flexing arms, legs, and neck muscles. What Obi-Wan wouldn't give to pick up his saber and spar with his master instead of ... instead of this.

Qui-Gon had fed him, bathed him, washed his hair, reworked his braid, and reminisced about their early missions together. His master eventually fell silent, gently smoothed his damp hair, and smiled. Obi-Wan wanted so desperately to smile back. "Obi-Wan, come back to me. I miss you."

Obi-Wan wanted to scream, wanted to cry, wanted to throw himself into his master's arms and sob with frustration. He slowly blinked his eyes and felt tears escape and roll down his cheeks. It was a start.

Qui-Gon drew in a quick breath. "O- Obi-Wan, are you with me? Can you understand me?" He swallowed hard and stared into his student's eyes. He reached up and brushed away the few tears, wishing for more. They would be a sign that Obi-Wan was there, somewhere, trying to get out.

After a few moments he sighed and carried Obi-Wan carefully to bed, settling him into a comfortable position and drawing up the cover. "Sleep now, Obi-Wan. I will see you again in the morning."

Obi-Wan woke to see his friend Bant. She was sitting next to his bed, absently stroking his arm as she read from a data pad. It had been nearly a year since they had been at the Temple together. He felt a surge of happiness. They had a year's worth of missions to share, so much to talk about. Then, along with complete consciousness came the crushing memory of his condition.

She looked up and smiled at him. "You're awake, Obi-Wan. Master Qui-Gon asked me to sit with you while he met with the healers. He thinks you may have made some progress tonight. I was hoping you would wake before I left." She continued to gaze at him, searching, and he saw her smile begin to fade. Her large silver eyes held infinite sadness. "Oh, Obi. Where are you? I wish you could hear me."

'I can!' Obi-Wan silently cried. 'I do hear you. I've missed you, and I have so much to tell you.' The look on her face was killing him. 'Master, why?' he thought, as his best friend's anguish washed over him. 'Why did you let her see me like this?'

The weariness and helplessness he felt were overwhelming him. Involuntarily, his eyes closed. Obi-Wan heard the door and could sense his master's return. As if from far away, he heard Bant's despairing whisper. "I have to go now. Your master is back. My master and I leave tonight, but we will return soon." She paused. "You won't even know I was here, will you." Obi-Wan felt her light kiss brush his forehead. "My dear friend you are, Obi-Wan Kenobi," she said, the odd syntax a childhood tradition between them. "Get better, you will." Her voice was fading. It was so very hard to stay awake now. "May the Force be with you," she murmured, and she left.

Obi-Wan was having nightmares again - indistinct, shadowed impressions of threat and menace. He was being chased, but his running was slowing, stopping. He willed his legs to keep going, but they refused. He lay helplessly as the shadows overtook him, surrounded him, and swallowed him up.

He woke with a start. His eyes opened. It was still night, and Qui-Gon was here. His master's arms were folded on the bed, his head resting on them. He was asleep.

Obi-Wan fought to settle himself, to rid himself of the fear of his dream. He longed to reach out to Qui-Gon, wake him up, and feel those strong arms comforting and protecting him.

Obi-Wan closed his eyes and decided to try something. He would wake Qui-Gon. If he could, it would be a sign that he was regaining some control over his body and mind.

Obi-Wan's arms were resting at his sides. One hand was so close to his master's head. He struggled with all his might to focus on that hand and gathered all his strength of will. Obi-Wan accessed his training bond and found his master's presence. Qui-Gon was deeply asleep. Obi-Wan could sense his exhaustion and was nearly overwhelmed by its depths. 'Sorry, Master,' he thought. 'You need the sleep, but I'm going to wake you up.'

With one giant effort, Obi-Wan sent all of his energy into this one tiny movement and focused his thoughts on one word, /Master/.

Qui-Gon's head shot up from his arms just in time to be smacked in the face by Obi-Wan's hand, which had been aiming to rest on his master's head. Obi-Wan wanted to laugh with relief as Qui-Gon captured his hand and kissed it. "Obi-Wan, I heard you! You reached me!"

'I hit you,' Obi-Wan laughed to himself. 'That's a memorable first move.' He felt great, almost giddy from the effort and its success.

Nearly overwhelmed with relief and excitement, Qui-Gon studied his apprentice's blank face, his own face lit with joy. Though Obi-Wan remained expressionless, his eyes seemed brighter, more responsive. "Obi-Wan, can you squeeze my hand?" he asked eagerly. He waited. Nothing happened. "Please. Try your best, Obi-Wan. You can do it."

Obi-Wan was nearly weeping with effort. He knew he was close, but his mind was too scattered. He closed his eyes and calmed his raging nerves. With a tremendous burst of concentrated effort, he managed a weak grasp of his master's hand, then exhaled forcefully. He had been holding his breath.

He wanted to hold on to Qui-Gon and never let go, but he was too weak and exhausted. His hand relaxed. 'Master, don't let go,' he thought, and was amazed when Qui-Gon responded.

"I won't, Obi-Wan. I won't let go. I'm so proud of you. Now sleep, Padawan. We'll work some more in the morning."

Obi-Wan felt waves of peace and calm as his master's gentle hand smoothed the lines of concentration from his brow, then slid back to rest in his hair. Qui-Gon leaned forward and touched his forehead to Obi-Wan's. "Sleep now," he repeated. "I'm so proud."

As the days passed Obi-Wan continued to make small improvements. He couldn't always reach his master through their bond. Sometimes it seemed as though his errant thoughts were heard more often than the messages he concentrated so hard to send. He continually fought his frustration, trying to appreciate each small advance, but becoming desperate for more improvement.

For his part, Qui-Gon was the perfect coach, encouraging Obi-Wan, praising his successes and calming him after failures. Obi-Wan knew his master could sense the depths of his frustration, and he also knew Qui-Gon was shielding him from his own. His master wanted him back as badly as he wanted to return.

Qui-Gon was leading Obi-Wan through a series of simple commands. Obi-Wan had succeeded with some of them, but not others. He had made small movements of hands and feet and had nearly managed to lift one arm and reach for Qui-Gon's hand, but his arm dropped into his lap before contact was made. Obi-Wan was beginning to feel angry with himself. "Okay, Padawan, that was a very good try. Now... smile for me."

That was a new one. Obi-Wan didn't particularly feel like smiling, and he suspected that was why Qui-Gon had asked. His master knew his spirits were dropping. "Come, Obi-Wan." Qui-Gon was smiling genuinely at him. "I need to see your smile again. It's been far too long. Smack me in the face again, if it will help."

That did it. Obi-Wan felt his face break into a weak grin, and his eyes lit with delight at this small victory. With concentration, he managed to lift his arm from his lap and slowly swing it in the direction of his master's face. Qui-Gon laughed and caught his hand before it connected, as Obi-Wan knew he would. "Padawan, you wouldn't dare." Obi-Wan's smile grew wider, and a little mischievous. "I think you're plotting something, Obi-Wan."

/I am,/ Obi-Wan sent, his brow creasing with the effort.

His master's face turned serious. "Padawan, concentrate. Try to send me a longer message. Tell me what you're thinking."

Obi-Wan took a deep breath and let it out slowly. He focused on an image of himself and his master dueling and attempted to send it to Qui-Gon. He was gratified when Qui-Gon responded. "I see us training with sabers, Obi-Wan. Good. Now add words. Tell me what you're thinking," he repeated.

/I'm ...asking.../ He winced. That wasn't the right word. He concentrated harder, and began again. /I'm... planning ...new moves. I want... to surprise you./

Qui-Gon chuckled. "You mean to surprise me, eh? I'm definitely going to have to watch you." He smiled warmly and added,"Obi-Wan, you've come so far today. You've done so well. You do realize that, don't you, Padawan?"

Obi-Wan gave a slight nod. Qui-Gon laid a hand on the side of his student's face and stroked his cheek with a thumb. Obi-Wan leaned his head into his master's hand. He was so grateful to Qui-Gon for helping him through this. He swallowed nervously and took a deep breath. With the last of his strength for the day he focused on what he wanted to accomplish. "Thank you," he whispered.

"Padawan, I thought we would visit the gardens today. You've been in these rooms too long." Qui-Gon reached out and was startled when Obi-Wan caught his wrist in a weak grasp.

/No!/ Obi-Wan was desperate. This was the last thing he wanted to do.

"Obi-Wan..."

The grip on Qui-Gon's wrist tightened. "No," Obi-Wan whispered.

"Padawan, you can't hide in here forever."

'It won't be forever,' Obi-Wan thought fervently to himself. 'It can't be.' /I am... not ...hiding,/ he sent. He resented the implications of the word, yet he had to admit to himself that it was at least partially accurate.

His master sighed. "Padawan, try to talk. Tell me why you won't go."

Obi-Wan took a deep breath. He was so tired. Tired of feeling frustrated, tired of being taken care of, and tired of trying. He hated it when Qui-Gon asked him to talk. Something kept happening to the messages as his mouth formed the words. He almost never ended up saying what he meant to. He usually had more success communicating through their bond, though that was difficult as well.

"I won't... watch... people." That was not quite what he had intended, though as he thought about the words they did make an odd kind of sense. He didn't want to watch his friends look at him with pity. Obi-Wan closed his eyes, concentrated, and tried to continue. "You please keep me out." He looked miserably up at Qui-Gon. "Please."

Qui-Gon felt helpless. Obi-Wan's face had become much more expressive in the past few days, which was wonderful. But it was difficult for him to see his apprentice's pain and frustration so clearly reflected there. He truly thought a change of environment would be good for Obi-Wan, but he wouldn't push it.

"All right, Padawan. We won't go out today. Would you like it if Bant came to see you? She's been-"

"No!"

"Obi-Wan-"

"No! No! No!" Obi-Wan was nearly glaring at him. Qui-Gon nodded, slowly. Obi-Wan's head dropped and he closed his eyes in relief.

Qui-Gon squeezed his padawan's shoulder and gave him a little shake. "Obi-Wan." His student looked up obediently, and Qui-Gon continued. "Obi-Wan, you have nothing to be embarrassed about or ashamed of. Your friends care about you. They miss you and they want to see you, they don't pity you." Obi-Wan didn't look away, but Qui-Gon knew he hadn't reached him. He would drop the subject for now.

"Good morning, Obi-Wan. How are you feeling today?"

/I'm fine,/ Obi-Wan lied.

"Use words, Padawan. Don't be lazy."

Lazy? That hurt. Obi-Wan was exhausted. His muscles ached from the progressively tougher workouts, and his mind ached from how much thought even the most minor tasks required. He had already spent two hours with the healers, and the day had just begun. He knew he wasn't working on speech as much as Qui-Gon would like, but he didn't feel lazy. He concentrated hard to get each word right. "I... am... not... lazy."

"Good, Obi-Wan. Are you ready to get to work?"

Qui-Gon had been more demanding of Obi-Wan recently, requiring more from him mentally and physically and not accepting half-hearted attempts. He knew how strong his padawan was; it was time Obi-Wan remembered as well. Sometimes it hurt him to be tough with Obi-Wan, but the last thing his apprentice needed was weakness and sympathy.

Qui-Gon sat in a chair across from his padawan and held his arms straight out, hands curled into fists. "Obi-Wan, I want you to hold on to my fists and push my arms together. I'm going to resist you, so you're going to have to work hard."

Obi-Wan was immediately able to reach for and grasp his master's hands. This in itself was a good start, and Qui-Gon smiled his encouragement. Obi-Wan grinned back and began to push.

"This is good, Obi-Wan, but you're stronger than that Work."

Beads of sweat were breaking out on Obi-Wan's forehead. The pressure on Qui-Gon's hands became fractionally harder. Qui-Gon resisted. "Keep going, Padawan, you're doing well." The pressure increased. Qui-Gon resisted. "Come on, Obi-Wan. You can do better. Push." The pressure increased yet again. Obi-Wan's arms were trembling with exertion. "More, Obi-Wan."

/I can't./

"Speak, Padawan! Use words!" The pressure suddenly lifted as Obi-Wan's head dropped into his hands. His whole body was shaking. "Obi-Wan, I want to hear you!"

Obi-Wan was furious. He was furious at himself for his weakness, and he was furious with Qui-Gon for ordering him around like a trained animal. He looked at Qui-Gon defiantly. "Don't... speak... to me... like that!" he ground out slowly, carefully. "I hate you!"

Oh, gods. Obi-Wan felt sick. It! I hate it! Not you. Instantly his eyes welled with tears. He would never say that to his master! "I'm sorry!" he gasped. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry."

Qui-Gon thought his heart would break. He pulled his padawan into a fierce hug. "Shh. Obi-Wan, no."

"I'm sorry. I'm sorry," Obi-Wan stammered into his shoulder.

Qui-Gon rocked back and forth, comforting his apprentice. "Obi-Wan, it's all right. It's all right. Forget it." But Qui-Gon knew it would be difficult to take his own advice. He knew he wouldn't soon forget those words, spoken so quietly in Obi-Wan's beautiful voice. It wasn't what Obi-Wan had meant to say, but it was horrible to hear, nonetheless.

Obi-Wan sat in the common room alone following his afternoon session with the healers. His morning with Qui-Gon had ended so badly. He was desperate to make up for it. In private, he had practiced out loud what he wanted to say. It made him feel like an idiot, but that was nothing new these days. As soon as Qui-Gon returned from teaching his saber class Obi-Wan would talk with him. Really talk.

Qui-Gon walked back to his rooms slowly. He had found it very difficult to focus on teaching this afternoon. He knew he should be able to manage a quick meditation and release his anxieties to the Force. Somehow that didn't seem so easy today.

He paused outside his door and took a deep breath. He cared so deeply for Obi-Wan. He wanted nothing more than to help him recover completely, but he was beginning to feel at a loss as to how to do that. Did he really know what was best for Obi-Wan? Or was he pushing too hard and actually hindering his padawan's progress? Maybe he wasn't pushing hard enough. Qui-Gon sighed. One thing he did know, he wasn't accomplishing anything just standing here.

/Master?/

The message took Qui-Gon by surprise. He hoped Obi-Wan had not sensed his thoughts as well as his approach. He took another deep breath, palmed open the door, and smiled. "Hello, Obi-Wan. How was your session with the healers?"

/Fine, Master./

Obi-Wan seemed distracted, and Qui-Gon could detect a deep sense of unease. It worried him. "What's wrong, Padawan?" he asked anxiously. "Did the healers give you some bad news?"

Obi-Wan shook his head slightly. Qui-Gon could tell he was concentrating very hard. "I ...want ...to talk ...to you, Master."

Qui-Gon remained silent. He knew Obi-Wan wasn't finished, and he did not want to rush him.

"I said a... mistake. I would... never... hate... you, Master." Qui-Gon's heart turned over at the look on Obi-Wan's face and at the energy and effort his padawan was expending to tell him this. He moved closer, knelt by Obi-Wan's chair, and allowed him to continue uninterrupted. "Master... you always are teaching me. ...I want you proud. You are... so respected. I will work at talking."

Obi-Wan heaved a sigh of relief. It hadn't come out quite as he had rehearsed, but he thought he'd made his point. He searched Qui-Gon's face, hoping for understanding. His master's eyes were very bright, and he seemed at a loss for words. "Master?" he questioned.

Qui-Gon cleared his throat. "Obi-Wan," he said. "Obi-Wan, I am always proud of you. I have always been proud of you. Your strength amazes me and inspires me. Padawan, you also are respected."

Obi-Wan didn't know what to say, and wasn't sure he was physically able to speak at the moment, anyway. So he smiled. He felt as if a huge weight had been lifted from him. His relief and Qui-Gon's heartfelt words made him... happy. Truly happy - for the first time since this ordeal began. Obi-Wan reached out for Qui-Gon's hand.

"Master, can we... meditate today?" Privately in the past few days, Obi-Wan had tried, without success, to spend some time meditating. He missed the serenity and peace it always brought him. He certainly had not felt attuned to the Force for weeks. Not since before his kidnapping. He and Qui-Gon spent most of their time working on basic skills, and his Jedi training was taking a backseat to relearning such 'minor' talents as walking and talking. It was driving him mad.

Obi-Wan wanted to feel like a Jedi Padawan again, not an invalid. So he had decided to swallow his pride and risk showing his master how far his skills had deteriorated. His master was there to help and teach him - he wouldn't judge or belittle him. Still, Obi-Wan was feeling a little sick and very nervous. Not a good beginning. "I need your help, Master. ...I try. I can't... work in it alone." That sounded odd. Whatever. He knew Qui-Gon understood and he knew his speech was improving. He was learning to be patient with himself.

Qui-Gon had been waiting for this. He knew Obi-Wan had been trying to meditate recently. Sometimes Obi-Wan was accidentally projecting his thoughts to his master. Qui-Gon had actually 'heard' his padawan's most recent attempt from beginning to end. It had happened while Qui-Gon was teaching and had startled him enough that the padawan he was sparring with had nearly gotten the upper hand. It had taken an enormous amount of focus for Qui-Gon to continue the lesson while 'listening' to Obi-Wan's frustrated and futile efforts. He knew Obi-Wan was unaware of this, and he felt a bit deceitful not telling him, but he did not want Obi-Wan to concentrate on shielding while he was still working so hard on centering.

"Obi-Wan, meditation is an excellent idea. I think if we went to the meditation room or one of the gardens..."

"No!"

"...it would be easier." Qui-Gon continued as if Obi-Wan hadn't interrupted him. "You have seen nothing but these walls for weeks. It's no wonder you have had trouble centering yourself. If you will-"

"No, Master. ...I will not go. I..." Obi-Wan stopped to think for a bit. He had so much to say, and it was so hard. "I can not... get there. Too far. Too many watching. ...When I am strong, I-"

Qui-Gon interrupted Obi-Wan for the first time. "Obi-Wan, you are so much stronger than you think. Don't be afraid. Fear leads to-"

"Anger! Yes! I know!"

"Are you angry, Padawan?" Qui-Gon asked quietly.

"...Yes. I... have anger." Obi-Wan managed to sound contrite and defiant at the same time.

"What makes you angry, Obi-Wan? We need to discuss it, deal with it, and release it."

Obi-Wan sighed. This was going to take a while, and it would require a lot of talking. He knew his master would demand this conversation for his own good. There would be no backing out of it.

"I had a ...dream," he began. Obi-Wan winced, reaching for a difficult word. "...Remembering ...my ...time." Gods, this was hard. "What did I do wrong? I... think ...it was ...easy for them. Am I... Jedi?"

"Padawan, what happened was not your fault. It had nothing to do with your skill as a Jedi. They were well trained, well informed, and well prepared. Even if-"

Qui-Gon was looking and sounding sympathetic, and it made Obi-Wan angrier. "Never would you... lose. I lost. I am angry to so many... things." Force. He sounded like such a fool. Obi-Wan's new-found patience with himself was gone. Completely. He looked his master in the eye. "I know what I was. Easy then. Now... pathetic," he spat. "Anger is at me. At them. And...." He stopped.

"And?" Qui-Gon prompted. "Go ahead, Padawan. Say what you feel. Don't be afraid."

"And... you." His master nodded, but did not speak. Obi-Wan knew he was expected to continue, but his own thoughts on the matter were so confused he didn't know quite what to say. "Angry why? There are no... good reasons. You help me. When I feel that way, I feel it also at me more." There. Figure that out. Obi-Wan wasn't even totally sure what he meant.

"Obi-Wan, don't be angry with yourself for being angry with me."

'Unbelievable,' thought Obi-Wan. 'He understands me.'

"I've been angry with myself, too, Padawan. I should have been able to find you sooner. They had taken you off-planet, and it took me -"

/No!/ In his horror, Obi-Wan forgot his promise to speak out loud. /No! You saved me! That's not what I meant!/

"Padawan. It is perfectly reasonable to feel that way. I feel it myself."

/No! That is not what I meant. I'm angry because.../ Obi-Wan stopped, unsure of what came next. /Because... you would never have... been taken. You're... powerful. More than I will ever be. And now, the way I am, ...you are farther away than ever./ Obi-Wan had a sudden realization. He looked up at Qui-Gon. /I'm not angry with you, ...I'm envious/

Qui-Gon sighed. "Obi-Wan," he said, "I'm a Master. You are a Padawan. An exceptional Padawan. But you can't leap past years of training and experience just by wishing for it. You have no cause to feel inferior. You are inferior to no one."

/I should have been able to- /

"Padawan... please."

"...I'm sorry. ...I should have... been able to... resist." Obi-Wan took a deep breath. This was going to be hard to admit to his master. He wanted to say it correctly. "I became... I needed that drug. By the end... I remember... they waited. Longer. To see me... to see if I would... beg." He looked intensely at his master, wanting Qui-Gon to see the truth in his eyes. "I didn't," he said fiercely. "I wouldn't." He dropped his eyes and became quiet. "...But I wanted to. That," he said, and looked back up at his master,"That makes me angry."

They meditated, then, hands on each other's shoulders, heads bent, and foreheads touching. Qui-Gon guided the way, and Obi-Wan finally, vicariously, experienced the peace he had so missed. Together he and his master examined his feelings of anger and Obi-Wan was able to release much of it. There were some details of his captivity he still could not remember and didn't want to face. He didn't even try to reach for these missing memories. It was enough, this time, to share this calm serenity with his master. He did not want to spoil it.

Qui-Gon had been walking with Obi-Wan for nearly an hour, and they were both getting frustrated. Practicing this in their quarters was senseless. There was no where to go - no goal to reach. The constant turning and maneuvering was hindering any real progress. They needed a larger space. He stopped moving and turned to look at his apprentice. "Obi-Wan, this is useless. We're not getting anywhere. We're not going anywhere."

The look on Obi-Wan's face spoke eloquently of his mounting impatience. He began to drop his arm from Qui-Gon's waist. "I'm ready to stop."

Qui-Gon caught his arm and replaced it. His own arm tightened around Obi-Wan. "No, Padawan. We've just begun. We are not stopping. We will make progress today, but it won't happen if we stay here." He began to head for the door.

"Master. Stop. I don't- "

"You can come with me this way, Padawan, or I can carry you. Your choice." He looked Obi-Wan in the eyes, challenging him.

Obi-Wan looked startled, angry, defiant, and determined all at once. He set his jaw tightly. "Fine," he said through gritted teeth. "I choose to walk."

Obi-Wan was really angry. He knew Qui-Gon would use his superior strength to essentially force him to go along. He really had no choice. He certainly wasn't going to let his master carry him through the halls.

"Gardens or courtyard?" Qui-Gon asked curtly, locking eyes with his padawan.

"Gardens." Obi-Wan's teeth were still clenched.

"Fountains or lake?"

"Fountains."

"Good choice. Let's go."

Most everyone would be in class this time of day, a fact for which Obi-Wan was supremely grateful. They made it the short distance down the hall to the lift without seeing anyone. Qui-Gon looked at his apprentice as they rode the lift down. "That wasn't so bad, was it?" he asked pleasantly. Obi-Wan just glared at him. They rode the rest of the way in silence.

Qui-Gon was secretly a little amused by his padawan's glare. He wasn't sure why. At least his apprentice wasn't being verbally disrespectful. That he wouldn't tolerate. Qui-Gon knew this public outing would be tough on Obi-Wan, so he would cut him a little slack. And, he decided, he would be as cheerful as possible. Even if it killed him. Although he suspected his padawan would like to keep that honor for himself.

When they reached the gardens, Qui-Gon chose a path which led to some of the more secluded areas. He wanted to make this as easy on Obi-Wan as possible. They walked slowly. Obi-Wan's main difficulty, besides weak muscles, was that he seemed to have forgotten the rhythm of walking. He frequently stumbled and got tripped up on his own feet.

Obi-Wan stayed resolutely silent. But Qui-Gon could tell he was admiring his surroundings and was breathing deeply of the perfumed air. "It is beautiful, isn't it, Obi-Wan? I've not been down this path for a very long time." Obi-Wan only nodded, but his eyes were no longer angry.

They continued down the path in easy silence, Qui-Gon supporting Obi-Wan lightly, tightening his grip when his padawan stumbled now and then. He hoped Obi-Wan was beginning to enjoy this outing. He certainly was. ...Until they rounded a curve in the path and came upon a large group of children from the creche. The children were sitting quietly, listening to instructions before being allowed on their own to play. Obi-Wan would kill him for certain, now.

'Force, it looks like the entire creche is here!' Obi-Wan thought. And then they were surrounded by laughing children running in every direction.

Qui-Gon looked at him apologetically, and Obi-Wan shrugged. There was nothing to be done, and they were, by and large, being ignored. "It's okay. ...Let's keep going," he said, and smiled a little. He could tell his master was relieved.

As they walked, Qui-Gon became aware of Obi-Wan leaning more and more heavily on him. His padawan was exhausted, but obviously was not going to admit it. He led the way toward a bench. "Let's rest a while, Obi-Wan," he suggested. Before they could take a seat, a young boy came barreling around the bushes and ran headlong into Obi-Wan. It was all Qui-Gon could do to keep the three of them from tumbling into the grass.

"Oh! Padawan Kenobi! Master Jinn! I'm so sorry!" he gasped, his brown eyes wide. "I guess I wasn't watching where I was going." The child was clearly mortified.

"It's...all right, Ari," Obi-Wan said as he and Qui-Gon sat. He smiled reassuringly at the boy. "No one got hurt. Just... remember ...to be mindful of your sur- ...surroundings."

Qui-Gon couldn't help but smile. He remembered saying that so often to a certain active thirteen-year-old.

"You remember my name?" The boy was dazzled.

"Of course. ...I ...spoke to your ...group ...about...."

Qui-Gon drew in a breath. Obi-Wan obviously could not remember the word. But the child just seemed to think he was being prompted.

"Astronomy!" he cried. "You do remember! That's my favorite class, and you were my favorite speaker. You told the best stories about the constellations. And you made us laugh!"

Obi-Wan smiled again. "Thank you, Ari. That is... good... of you to say."

"Um, Padawan Kenobi? Can I ask you something?" Obi-Wan nodded. "Are you okay? You look really tired, and you don't... sound... like I remember."

Qui-Gon winced, but Obi-Wan showed no outward sign of discomfort. "Yes, Ari. ...I'm fine. Just... tired."

"I thought so." Ari apparently accepted this without question and moved on to another topic. "Hey! My friend Ry told me you spoke to his group and did a demonstration with your lightsaber. I was really jealous. Could you do that for my group? Please?"

"I... would like that," Obi-Wan said gently.

"Come soon. That would be so great. Can you come soon?"

Obi-Wan swallowed. "I'll try, Ari."

Ari leaned closer to Obi-Wan. He sneaked a look at Qui-Gon and whispered with awe, "Can you bring your master, too? He's really good."

Obi-Wan grinned, and whispered back conspiratorially, "Yes, he is. I'll ...ask him. He's... usually... pretty good about ... stuff like that."

"Great! Thanks!" Ari exclaimed. He pushed a lock of dark hair from his eyes and smiled. "I'd better get back. Sorry I ran into you. Goodbye, sirs!" And he was off like a shot.

Qui-Gon didn't know what to say. He had always known Obi-Wan was good with children, but he was amazed at his apprentice's kindness and grace under these circumstances. Obi-Wan was staring off in the direction the boy had run. He seemed far away. Qui-Gon rubbed a hand on his padawan's back for a moment, then gave his braid a tug. "Obi-Wan..."

Obi-Wan shook himself back to the moment and looked at his master. "I... rested enough. ...Let's keep walking."

Obi-Wan was alone in the common room. Qui-Gon was teaching, and Obi-Wan used the time to do some light weightlifting. He was fully aware that his master would be upset with him for working out alone; would say it was too dangerous and he needed a spotter. But Obi-Wan didn't care. His conversation with Ari was weighing on him.

He concentrated on the weights in his hands. They should feel so light to him. But the few repetitions he had done left his muscles quivering and his body bathed in sweat. Obi-Wan was feeling disgusted by his own weakness, and his temper was rapidly rising.

As he struggled to lift the weights just once more, the door chimed. The sound startled him, and the weight in his left hand suddenly dropped to the floor, landing neatly on his bare foot. He gritted his teeth against the pain, and muttering curses in every language he knew, he limped his way toward the door. "Well, come in," he growled between oaths.

The door slid open, and Obi-Wan was surprised to see Bant. He hadn't even thought to wonder who might be there. She looked very uncomfortable. Over the years he had learned to read her expressions, which many people found difficult to do with Calamarians. She seemed hesitant to enter, and he realized the look on his face probably wasn't helping.

"Bant," he managed, "Please ...come in." Why was she here? He wasn't ready to see her. He wasn't ready to talk to any of his friends.

She took a tentative step forward. "Obi-Wan, I... I know you don't want to see me. I've been asking Master Jinn for weeks. But I..." Her face broke into a smile. "I'm so glad to see you up and around. I've been so worried."

He grinned back. He really was happy to see her, despite the situation. "Why did... you come here?" Well, that sounded rude. But he was confused. And his foot hurt. He started to limp toward a chair, and Bant grabbed his arm to support him.

"Obi-Wan, you hurt yourself lifting weights, didn't you." Her voice was accusing as well as concerned. She sat him down, and he looked up at her, a surprised expression on his face.

"How did... you know?"

"Your master contacted me. He interrupted his class to do it. He knows exactly what you're doing, Obi-Wan." She grinned. "In trouble you are. Very angry he is."

Obi-Wan silently resumed his litany of curses. When would he get his shielding figured out again? He never knew when he was broadcasting to Qui-Gon anymore. It was unnerving. He sighed. "Know him I do. Kill me... he will not."

"I think he'd like to, from the sound of his voice," Bant replied. "Except he's obviously not interested in taking any chances with you. We just got you back."

Obi-Wan frowned a little. "I am not... back. I'm... not myself. Everything is so... hard, Bant. I didn't want you to... see this in me."

"Obi-Wan, I came to sit with you once shortly after Master Jinn brought you back to the Temple. You woke up once, but I don't think you had any idea I was there. I've been worried about you for weeks. When your master asked me not to visit, it upset me. So to see you like this doesn't bother me, Obi-Wan. It's wonderful. You've come so far."

"I did see you, Bant. I... knew you were there. I couldn't... talk... or move. I felt... bad for you."

"Obi-Wan." She gave him a sudden hug. "I'm so glad you knew I was there. I never wanted you to feel alone, or that your friends didn't care."

Obi-Wan smiled at his gentle friend. She had always been the caretaker of their little group. A flicker of apprehension abruptly crossed his face, but the smile held. "Coming, my master is. Go you must. See this... you should not."

Bant stood up and took his hand. "Take care, Obi-Wan. See me again, you shall." It was both a promise and a demand. She looked him solemnly in the eyes for a moment, then left.

Well. Qui-Gon was coming. And Obi-Wan could sense his mood. It wasn't pleasant. Obi-Wan looked up when the door opened and met his master's eyes.

Qui-Gon crossed the room in a few long strides and stood before Obi-Wan, his hands on his hips. "I know you're hurt, Obi-Wan. What happened?" His voice was a reprimand in itself.

"Nothing terrible happened, Master. ...I was ...startled by the door." He looked down. "Dropped a weight on my foot," he muttered, a little embarrassed. "You needn't have sent a ...guard to watch over me."

That last part didn't appear to help his master's mood any. Qui-Gon's face tightened. "You would not need a 'guard', Padawan, if you had some sense. You should not be working out alone. Not yet. You know this, Obi-Wan."

A wave of the bitterness Obi-Wan had been struggling with for weeks crested in him. "I was not... careless. The weights were...pathetically light. I..." He knew the next word was strong and dangerous, but it was what he felt. "... hate my weakness."

Qui-Gon gave him a warning look. "Be vigilant with these feelings, Padawan. Do not take them lightly."

"Yes, Master."

"Your weakness is a part of you for now. Accept it. It is temporary. Until your strength returns sufficiently, you will train only with supervision. Understood?"

There was no arguing with that tone. "Yes, Master." Obi-Wan sighed. "I am getting very... tired... of this. I want to be better now. Sometimes I just want to... kick something."

Qui-Gon dropped wearily into the chair next to Obi-Wan's. "Your own ass would be a good place to start."

Obi-Wan raised an eyebrow at his master, startled by the uncharacteristic response. He saw the irritated expression on his master's face, and for some reason it made him laugh. Hard.

Qui-Gon's eyes narrowed. "You are determined to test me today, Padawan."

"I'm sorry, Master." Obi-Wan tried to pull himself together, but ended up with a rather disrespectful-looking smirk on his face.

Qui-Gon shook his head and gave a small laugh. "I'm serious, Padawan. You don't want to upset me like that again. Trust me."

"Yes, Master." Obi-Wan knew it to be true.

/Master! Please... Help me!/ Qui-Gon woke with a start. Obi-Wan was calling him, sounding desperate and frightened. He leaped from bed and ran to his Padawan's room.

Obi-Wan was asleep. He was restless, moaning, struggling against something unseen.

Qui-Gon sat next to him on the bed and took hold of his shoulders. "Obi-Wan. Obi-Wan. Wake up. I'm here. You're safe."

Obi-Wan's eyes shot open. He stopped struggling and lay very still, breathing heavily. His eyes finally focused on his master and he took a few deep breaths, bringing his racing heart under control. Qui-Gon kept the eye contact, grounding him, calming him.

Finally, simultaneously, they both nodded. Qui-Gon let go of Obi-Wan and sat up straight. Obi-Wan scooted back and sat up as well, leaning against the wall.

Qui-Gon waited. Obi-Wan rubbed at his temples with both hands and took a few more slow, deep breaths. "I was running," he began. "They were... chasing me. I think I was... escaping. But... they weren't... angry. They were... having fun." He looked up at his master. "Why? What... were they?"

Qui-Gon sighed. He had wondered when Obi-Wan would begin asking these questions. "They were hunters, Obi-Wan. They hunted other humans for pleasure... for sport. Usually they took solitary individuals. People no one would miss. But they decided to go for bigger game. The ultimate challenge." He let Obi-Wan begin to absorb this, then continued. "They took you off-planet, as I said. They had a compound - a resort." He paused and looked at his apprentice. Obi-Wan nodded for him to continue. "Members could... pay... for the privilege of...."

"Of hunting me." Obi-Wan looked very pale in the moonlight. "I remember the running... being chased... but... why did..." He looked up at Qui-Gon in horror. "I asked them... once... why... why the drug. They said... they knew I would come back... on my own... for more. I... I think-" He stopped, miserable, unable to finish.

Qui-Gon reached out and took his hand. "Obi-Wan. When I finally found you the compound was deserted. They knew we were coming. They disappeared and left you behind. They are being hunted themselves, now. But, Obi-Wan, they were not members of the Republic, and some of them are so wealthy, powerful, well-connected...."

"They may never be found," Obi-Wan finished. "And if they are, they may walk." He was quiet for a long moment. " ...Master, I am..."

"Feeling the same inappropriate emotions I have been dealing with since before I found you. Anger, hatred, revenge -- we must not let these emotions consume us. I have spent many hours in meditation, Padawan. I have been able to release my anger and accept the will of the Force." Qui-Gon closed his eyes. 'What a liar you are,' he admonished himself.

"Master," Obi-Wan whispered. "I need your help."

Qui-Gon gathered his apprentice in his arms. They sat that way in silence for a long while. Then, together, they meditated.

"Hello, Obi-Wan. Studying?"

Startled, Obi-Wan looked up from his datapad. He had been concentrating so hard that he hadn't even noticed his master come in. "I'm trying to catch up. I've missed quite a lot."

"You're a very quick study, Obi-Wan. I'm not worried at all about the work you've missed." Obi-Wan grinned, pleased with the compliment. Qui-Gon sat down across from his apprentice and leaned forward, elbows resting on his knees. "Obi-Wan, I've just been to see your healers."

"Without me?" Obi-Wan frowned. He did not like the idea of being excluded from any discussion of his recovery.

"Yes, Padawan. I had some questions concerning your training and I felt it best to go alone." Obi-Wan knew not to challenge his master's authority, and kept quiet. After a pause, and a nod of satisfaction, Qui-Gon continued. "I feel, and the healers agree, that you are able to begin training with your saber." He looked at Obi-Wan, inviting comment.

Obi-Wan felt a wave of conflicting emotions wash over him. He had been waiting for this day, dreaming of it. He was thrilled with the prospect of working with his lightsaber once again. However, his master's choice of words, 'begin training', bothered him. Force, he was twenty years old! He had been training for well over a decade, and he knew he was unusually accomplished for one his age. Did Qui-Gon believe he would be starting with the skills of an initiate?

"Master, I'm pleased you feel I'm ready," he began, rather formally. "I have been unwilling to ask about it. I... did not want to be refused."

"Then why do you sound so... unenthusiastic?" Qui-Gon asked with a bit of a confused smile.

Obi-Wan sighed. "I'm sorry. I am more than ready. I just don't want to disappoint you."

"Disappoint me?" Where had that come from? Qui-Gon always felt a seemingly boundless pride in his apprentice. He had every confidence in Obi-Wan, and was uncertain of the reasons behind his hesitant attitude. "Padawan, what's bothering you? Tell me. You know you can trust me, Obi-Wan."

"I know. ...I do." But Obi-Wan wasn't sure what else to say. The more he thought about it, the more he realized he was actually worried about disappointing himself. Qui-Gon had been nothing but supportive, encouraging, and optimistic during his recovery. Obi-Wan knew his master would help him through anything, but what if his skills had deteriorated beyond repair? What if there was no getting back what he had lost? He shook his head. When had he developed a defeatist attitude? Enough already. He looked up at Qui-Gon. "Can we start right away?"

They stood in the center of the training room Qui-Gon had already reserved. He wanted to begin Obi-Wan's training in private, so his padawan could concentrate fully. Although they had made more frequent trips out of their rooms, and Obi-Wan had hidden his discomfort with grace and dignity, Qui-Gon knew his apprentice was still self-conscious. If this lesson turned out to be a difficult one....

Obi-Wan ignited his lightsaber and powered it down to training strength. Just holding his weapon, feeling its power, its perfect weight and balance in his hand, was invigorating. He felt an energy he had not felt since beginning his recuperation. He smiled.

"How do you feel, Padawan?" Qui-Gon asked, already knowing the answer.

"Wonderful."

"Ready?"

"Ready."

"Then let's begin. Warm up with the first kata." Qui-Gon watched carefully, looking for signs of fatigue or distress. He would not allow the workout to continue if it became unsafe. As he watched, his feelings of apprehension began loosening their hold. Obi-Wan was not working at his usual speed, but his grace was unmistakable. None of the difficulty his padawan had experienced in regaining control of his muscles was apparent here. Not for the first time, the Master felt amazement at his apprentice's abilities in this discipline. He was fortunate to have such a skillful student. It made teaching unbelievably rewarding.

Obi-Wan finished and looked up at Qui-Gon, his eyes shining. He was breathing hard. "How was that, Master? It felt... good."

"Excellent, my padawan." Qui-Gon struggled to keep his tone professional. "Begin number two."

"I think I'm ready for number five."

"Number two, Padawan."

Again, the kata went smoothly. Qui-Gon was less concerned with speed than with accuracy and fluency. And his padawan definitely had both. At the end of the routine, he tossed Obi-Wan a towel. The boy looked exhausted. "Take a break, Obi-Wan. I'll be back in a moment." Qui-Gon had neglected to fill their water bottle. He was not about to let his apprentice get dehydrated.

Obi-Wan was exhilarated. He felt happier than he had in weeks. And relieved. And confident. And so in touch with the Force. He decided not to interrupt his flow. He tossed away the towel and launched into the fifth kata, one of his favorites. It required strength and dexterity, and contained interesting combinations of movements which he found almost poetic.

Qui-Gon reentered the room. He saw Obi-Wan and stopped, transfixed. Belatedly, he realized that his padawan had obviously blatantly disregarded his directions. It was not yet time for the fifth. But it was being so beautifully done....

Suddenly, Obi-Wan stumbled and lost concentration. His lightsaber, which he had been raising, struck him on the shoulder as it fell. He pitched forward, hard, his hands grabbing for his knee.

"Obi-Wan!" Qui-Gon ran to his side and knelt down. Obi-Wan was rocking back and forth, clutching his right knee. He was biting his lip to keep from crying out. Qui-Gon gently pulled his padawan's hands out of the way. He took hold of the injured leg and closed his eyes, using the Force to determine the extent of the damage. He breathed a sigh of relief. The sprain was not a serious injury, just a painful one. His intense worry was quickly replaced by anger. "Damn it, Obi-Wan, what were you doing? You deliberately disobeyed me."

"I apologize, Master," the young man said, his teeth clenched in pain. "I meant no disrespect. I got carried away."

"You're not ready for the fifth!" Qui-Gon ground out. He was furious.

"Obviously," Obi-Wan replied, his voice strained. He managed a weak, self-deprecating smile for his master. "It was great while it lasted, though, wasn't it?"

"You're not going to charm your way out of this, Obi-Wan. I need to be able to trust you. I need to know you're not going to do something idiotic when my back is turned." He glared at his pale, exhausted apprentice. "Do you understand me, Padawan?"

"Yes, Master. I'm sorry I was an idiot."

"Cut it out, Obi-Wan. I am furious with you, do you understand that? ...Let me see your shoulder."

Obi-Wan winced as Qui-Gon examined the burn. "Obi-Wan, you're lucky it didn't turn out worse than this. You know you've just set back your own training by several days? And I am not bringing you back here until you promise to follow my instructions to the letter. I'm not trying to hold you back, Padawan. We need to proceed at a safe pace. You have to trust me. The last thing I want is for you to get hurt." He searched his apprentice's eyes for understanding. Satisfied, he held out his hand. "Are you ready to try standing?"

Obi-Wan nodded, and his master easily lifted him upright. He leaned heavily on Qui-Gon. His knee was a giant knot of burning pain, and his shoulder ached fiercely, but a part of him was still exuberant at his success with the first two exercises. Obi-Wan knew now, without a doubt, that he would be able to regain the ability he had lost. It was tremendously comforting.

"It's closer to our quarters, Padawan. We'll go back there and make the healers come to us. They're going to be furious with both of us, you know."

They started the slow walk back, Obi-Wan grimacing with pain and taking quick, shallow breaths. He felt the need to explain himself to his master, to make him understand his impulsive behavior. "I apologize for my disobedience, Master. It felt so good to be training again, and I knew it was going well."

"Yes, it was," Qui-Gon murmured. "Keep your weight off your leg."

"I was so worried that I would fail. ...I thought there was a chance that I would never- ow! recover my skills. You know how important this is to me."

"I know, Obi-Wan, but do not sabotage your own recovery with your impatience. Deep breaths, Padawan."

"Yes, Master."

Qui-Gon finished setting the table for the evening meal, then went to fetch his padawan. He stopped in Obi-Wan's open door and frowned. "I thought you were resting."

Obi-Wan looked up. "I am resting. I'm also reading."

"You're working, Obi-Wan. I sent you in here to lie down."

Obi-Wan grimaced at his master's reproving tone. "Master, I need to catch up."

Qui-Gon looked exasperated. "Padawan, you just injured yourself trying to catch up too quickly. What did the healers say to you?"

"That I need rest."

"Exactly. How much rest?"

Obi-Wan rolled his eyes. "A lot of rest."

"Very good. They also told you that you need to...." He looked at Obi-Wan, prompting him.

Obi-Wan sighed. "That I need to listen to my master and do as he says or I will have to stay in the healing wing until my knee is completely healed," he recited.

"Good." Qui-Gon crossed the room and sat on the bed. He looked seriously at his padawan, a hint of warning in his eyes. "Obi-Wan, I want you here. With me. But I will not hesitate to send you to the healers if I feel it is necessary."

Obi-Wan's eyes narrowed. "That's a threat, isn't it."

"Absolutely." Point made, Qui-Gon moved on, expecting a very well-behaved apprentice. "It's time to eat, Padawan."

Obi-Wan grinned. "Yes, Master. Whatever you say."

"Right." Qui-Gon stood and offered a hand. "No weight on your leg, Obi-Wan. The sooner it's healed, the sooner we can get back to training."

"Yes, Master." Obi-Wan allowed Qui-Gon to help him to the table. He looked at the feast spread before him. Qui-Gon had prepared all of his favorites. "Look at this. What's the occasion? I thought you were furious with me."

"I was, but that's no reason to let you starve." Obi-Wan just raised his eyebrows. Qui-Gon shrugged. "I thought after today's lesson it would be good to have a nice meal ready."

Obi-Wan peered at his master suspiciously. "To celebrate? Or to cheer me up?"

Qui-Gon smiled. "Whichever."

Obi-Wan became serious. "Master, did you think it would go badly?"

Qui-Gon shook his head. "No, Obi-Wan, I never thought that. My only concern was that I might be pushing you too fast. Turns out you took care of that on your own."

Obi-Wan sighed. "And now you're back to helping me walk, again." He smiled. "Thank you for this, Master."

"You are welcome, Obi-Wan."

Obi-Wan closed his eyes. He felt overwhelmed. He thought back to his master helping him relearn how to walk, to talk, to meditate.... Too many emotions, too many memories, too many frustrations and successes, too many words unspoken. All seemed to be welling up inside him. Abruptly, he realized he was unbelievably tired and he had a desperate headache. But he was going to be all right, and there was only one reason why. He blew out the breath he hadn't realized he was holding, and reached up with both hands to rub at his eyes.

Qui-Gon glanced up from serving the food, concern plainly visible. "Obi-Wan, what is it? Is something wrong?"

Obi-Wan looked at his master, an odd expression of amazement on his face. He began shaking his head. "There is no possible way I could have gone through this without you, Master. I... Here I am, thanking you for dinner, when I owe you everything."

"Obi-Wan-"

"No. I... I'm serious. I can't even comprehend what I would have done without you. You did everything for me. I... I..." He stopped, still shaking his head. He was utterly at a loss for words. He felt as he had when he was first trying to talk again. When the words would not come, no matter how hard he reached for them.

"Padawan, I am your master. I wanted to help you. I needed to have my apprentice returned to me. But your recovery is due to you. To your strength."

"You taught me how to be strong, Master."

Qui-Gon smiled.

The opponents faced each other, weapons drawn and bladed. With a sudden forceful lunge they came together, sabers clashing. The speed and grace of the duel was amazing, and the children's faces lit with excitement and admiration. Ari watched the Jedi with pride. Padawan Kenobi had kept his promise. And he had brought his master, as well. Ari felt lucky to have run into them in the gardens that day. Well, he would maybe change the actual running into them part, but the result was more than he could have hoped for. The rest of the creche were in awe of him for arranging this, and Ari couldn't help feeling a little self-satisfied. He quickly damped down the emotion, not wanting to seem at all inappropriate before his heroes.

Ari watched the end of the demonstration with appreciation, and before anyone could stop him, he ran onto the floor, snatching two towels on his way. To his embarrassment, he barely stopped himself before repeating his humiliating collision from the garden. With a smile, Padawan Kenobi reached out a hand to steady him before he fell at their feet. "Remember, Ari. Be mindful of your surroundings."

Ari grinned back, his face reddening slightly. "I'll remember. I guess I got too excited." He handed Obi-Wan and Qui-Gon the towels he'd brought them, and they nodded their thanks. "I didn't think you would remember me, Padawan Kenobi. Not the first time, from astronomy class, and not even the second time, from the garden. Thank you for coming." Ari took in their cool, relaxed appearance. Amazing, considering the workout they'd just had. He leaned toward them and whispered confidentially, "I think it went really well."

"I think so, too, little one," Master Jinn said kindly. Then he looked at his apprentice with approval. "Very well, indeed. You had a few surprises for me, Padawan."

Obi-Wan smiled at his master, then turned to the boy. "I would like to thank you, Ari," he said sincerely. "I'm very glad we met in the garden that day. You were a help to me."

Ari felt proud, but confused. "Well, ...you're welcome! You seem... better, Padawan Kenobi."

"I am. Thank you."

"We all really had fun today," Ari said. He hesitated, not wanting to push his luck. "I was wondering. Do you think you could do this again sometime? Sometime soon?" He gave the Jedi a hopeful grin.

Obi-Wan reached out to ruffle the boy's dark hair. "Yes, Ari. I can." He looked up at his master with a confident smile. "I'm sure I can."

END