Master Apprentice Archive Porn Quick search:

Archiving: M_A please, also at www.angelfire.com/ma3/padders
Category: Humour/Parody. PWP, AU, Fetish/Kink
Pairing: Q/O
Rating: NC-17
Warning: Very graphic sex, with very bad language and really silly porn-talk :)
Disclaimer: George Lucas, we pray that you will never read this. Failing that, we pray your nice-ness is as boundless as your talent and genius. No infringement intended, no money made, we're poor! (But unattached women. Jade's hot in bed. So I heard *wink*)  Jade: What the fuck?  Well, as long as it's a compliment (I think).
Feedback: Yes please, we're brave *g*
Author's Notes:
Boots: Before I'm stoned to death *g* can I lay on the guilt and say how wonderful you all are for putting up with our brain-spasms? Now, this is a slash-story done in the style of gay porn. The idea's Jade's, I just chose the location ;) (Jade:  And some of Qui-Gon's dubious tastes in sex acts...)The is meant to be fun, but if you get sick from reading it, you've been warned here that Jade and I have obviously been to some very naughty places on the net *g* Now on with the show!

Jade:  Yes, this fic is my idea...I had been reading some professionally written porn that even my writing would put to shame, and the thought of writing so badly intrigued me to no end.  Boots wanted in, and well, when she gets started, she's hard to resist :)  It's a nasty little out-of-character piece that I'm a bit ashamed and surprised and scared that we did it.  I didn't know I had so much of the dark side in me, haha!  I'm hoping you all have a sense of humor...

* * * * *
Obi-Wan
I made my way past the stuffy diplomats to the male's room, staggering a bit because I had too much to drink. 'Damn, that wine is making me horny!'  I think to myself as I pushed open the door and stumbled inside.  I sighed in relief at the sight of a long line of urinals that lined one wall.  The room was empty because it was getting late, and the ambassador's conference on Hutt office politics was over.  I chose a urinal close to the middle and pulled my 7-1/2 inch cock out.  I thumbed the thick foreskin back from the purple head and aimed.  A thick, hot stream of yellow liquid poured out endlessly, making me sigh with relief.  When I heard the door of the bathroom open, I turned and saw my hunky, but aloof, master walk in.

"Hullo, Master"  I said in my most alluring voice, wondering if he was up for a shag, cause I was sick of wanking my meat in the room next to him when we could be fucking, for Force's sake.

"Hello, Padawan" he said, his thick, manly voice causing my hungry dick to twitch lively in my hand as I continued pissing.  He walked right up to the urinal next to me and whipped his fat, huge, masterly cock out of his leggings.  My pretty boy eyes bulged when I saw that monster of a cock so close up!  I licked my lips, hoping that my bear of a master would take a liking for my pretty boy ass and mouth.  How large was that thing? I had stopped pissing, but now held my manmeat in my hands, lightly stroking it and staring at his cock as he pissed.

* * * * *
Qui-Gon

The Senate mingle was so boring, so I had a couple of beers as Palpatine talked on and on. Obi-Wan, my slut babe Padawan, just kept handing me the jugs. Moving that pert little bubble butt of his back and forth from the buffet to our seats. He's a good looking kid, natural blond, not that tall, but every inch of that bod was sculptured like a young god. Me, I'm in pretty good shape as well. What with being a Jedi Master and all. I'm 6'5", blue eyed, and don't look a day over thirty-two. I take good care of myself, so that I'll never look like some sad old Master, with a beer-gut hanging over a sorry cock nobody would want to suck. I go to the solarium twice a week to keep up my tan. I even thought of dying my silvering hair once, but Obi-Wan begged me not to, he even told me he found older men sexy!

Watching him waddle his gorgeous ass into the public toilet, I thought oh yeah, that boy is so ripe for the picking his cherries are gonna pop themselves if I don't get my ass on it soon. My cock throbbing in my pants with the excitement of trailing my padawan as well as the need to piss, I followed him into the loo. What I saw made me want to get up and fuck his writhing body against the urinal wall.

By the Force, the boy has grown the most adorable prick this side of the galaxy. Short and stubby, it was wobbling in his hand like a cute little button nose, just made for blowing. He was pissing, sighing deeply as he relieved his bladder. With his legs parted and his pants around his ankles, I felt like getting onto my knees and putting his little guy cock in my mouth. But I played it cool. Sauntering to the urinal next to him, I took out my dick, the whole 10 inches, 12" when I'm hot and ready for it.

Lifting the head of my cock and aiming at the bowl, I looked at Obi-Wan out of the corner of my eyes. He was pink and panting excitedly at my prick like a dog wanting a bone. I grinned smugly to myself and start pumping piss out of my thick, uncut, nobbly prick.

"Oh that feels good," I moan and snuck a hand down the back of Obi-Wan's leggings, caressing the round globe of his butt. "I like pissing, Obi-Wan. And I like it even better when you watch me." His innocent blue eyes got big as dinner plates and his
little cock twitched like it was coming alive.

 * * * * *

Obi-Wan

I felt my big master's hand heating up the firm, tight globes of my luscious ass.  I clenched them a bit and his baby blues lit up with interest.  Oh yeah, big man, you'll be getting *there* soon!  I was so happy that he was groping me that I almost forgot how hard my throbbing meat was becoming!

"And I like watching you, it turns me on."  I said, my voice real low.  I boldly looked at his huge rod.  I watched as he shook off the last drops of urine from his leaking dickhead and then turned to me.  I stopped looking at his lightsaber to see him staring at mine.

"See anything you like, Maaaster?"  I let go of my throbbing prick so he could get a good eyeful.  I stood there, waiting, with my back against the wall, between two urinals.  Like the boyish slut he knew I was.

He licked his luscious, hairy lips and nodded his head. I gasped when he grabbed hold of me and shoved his tongue down my throat.  Eagerly, I kissed him back. Finally, Master was going to be giving me the "training" I so wanted!  I thrust my eager boy body against him, but he stopped the sexy, sloppy kiss to look again at my 9 full inches of hard flesh.  I returned the gaze, staring at his big, meaty rod.  I licked my lips, waiting for him to take control again.

"Oh, Padawan!  I've been wanting to suck you off all night!"  I gasped as he went straight down to his knees.  Finally, we were not only going to follow the will of the force, but the will of our cocks!  I spread my legs as far as I could, giving him access to my little hairy nuts.  I hadn't jerked off all day, so they were full of juice for my master.  Qui-Gon dove his head between my legs and started tonguing my nuts.  He took each one into his mouth, making them wet with his saliva.  He had a talented tongue, I thought as he paid special attention to my balls.  My dick oozed pre-cum as he worked his magick on my nuts. "Oooh, that's it, Master mine, suck those juicy balls!"

Did I say that out loud?  Damn, he's talented if he's got me talking like a two-credit whore.  Evidently hungry for the main course, Qui-Gon released my scrote and starting licking my hungry, throbbing meat.  His lips engulfed my pretty purple head with a loud groan. I moaned real loud as his mouth enveloped my flesh in one sliding motion.

"Yes, Master!  Suck it!"  I cried out as his tongue danced along the underside of my prick.  My meat was so deep inside his throat that his big nose was sniffing my pubes as he worked it.  I stretched out my arms, grabbing onto the urinals for support as Master sucked my cock as if the balance of the Force depended on it. My little balls rose to the occasion, I knew I was going to shoot my load soon.

"Ah, Master!  I'm going to cum!"  I said, "Gonna shoot my load!"  All the jizz that I had been saving for my master began firing out of my fleshy prod.

* * * * *

Qui-Gon

"Oh yes Padawan! Shoot your load, pump your cum all over my face!" I was so hot and desperate for the taste of his sweet man-juice, I shook as I reached down to stroke my own cock. "Right here, on my beard Obi-Wan, oh fuck yessssss. . . "

I lifted my face and fixed my eyes on the his prick hole, parting my pre-cum coated lips and moved my hips back and forth, begging him for it. "Come on Obi-Wan, fucking cum on my face!"

His bright blue eyes opened at the sound of my shouting, his lips were trembling when he looked down at me, his eyebrows twisted together like two entangled bodies.

"Master, OH MASTER!" his neck went all stiff and awkward, his slim hips bucked forward and he caught his own cockhead between his thumb and forefinger.

I gave his ass cheeks a big squeeze with my free hand and urged him forward even more. His back stiffened and Obi-Wan came all over my face, screaming my name like a mantra. I opened my mouth to catch the first spurts, I was mighty thirsty! Then I moved my face around and got it all painted with his glistening white boy cum. Oh fuck, that was the best blow-job I'd ever given in my life. It was real special, you know! Obi-Wan was still screaming 'Fuck, fuck, cumming so hard it hurts, oh
Force, Qui-Gon I can't stop cumming!!'

His balls were drawn up very tight against his cock root and he was truly beautiful when he came. I felt myself falling in love with my slut-padawan, oh yes, he was going to be the fuck of my life!

"I love you!" I told him as he dropped to his knees in front of me. "Let me prove my undying love to you, Obi-Wan, my joy bumkins!"

"Oh Force, Qui-Gon, I love you too!" he sighed breathlessly, sounding as well blown as he was. "Yes, let us prove our eternal devotion to each other! TAKE ME TO THE CUBICLE!"

I was almost crying happiness as I dragged him inside and turned the little sign to "Occupied".

* * * * *
Obi-Wan

I let my hunky master drag me into the cubicle because he had turned my legs to jelly with that mind-blowing cock sucking of his.  I felt like he had jacked my brains out through my nutsack!  Still warm and gushy feeling from his protestations of love, I grabbed the man and kissed him on the lips.  I felt myself grow hard again as he pushed me up against the wall, grinding his
12" inches of hard, throbbing cockmeat into my stomach.

"Oooh, Master, I want you to fuck my little boy ass!"  I cried out desperately.  I have waited too long for him to shove his big fleshy lightsaber deep into my hungry boy pussy.  I took his hands and placed them on my quivering ass melons to drive the point home.  He stopped shoving his tongue hungrily down my throat to look me in the eyes.

"Oh, my little slut Padawan, are you sure about this?"

He had the audacity to ask.  I sure as hell did!

"Oh, Yes Master!  I want you to pop my little boy cherry!"  Just to show how badly I wanted him, I knelt down and started slobbering on his meaty cock, getting it nice and wet.  He let out a long, shuddering groan as I covered his throbbing prick with saliva so he could penetrate me all the more quickly.  His big, hot hands took hold of my head, and made me stay still while he pumped into my eager mouth.  I was going to let him have his way with me, no matter what!  My own prod started filling out again, as sucking off my master was the most exciting thing for me to do.

"Obi-Wan, suck me, Padawan!"  I knew my master was getting close, his nuts were getting high.

* * * * *
Qui-Gon

His fresh pink mouth opened over his pearly clappers and Obi-Wan got down on his knees in front of me. I sat down on the toilet and pulled out my love-rod much to his delight, oh my Padawan sure knew good equipment when he saw it!

"Oh Master!" he lisped has he took hold of the temple-jewels. "For me?"

"Yes, Padawan," I played with my cock-head in front of his nose, squeezing the tip for some dick-sauce to trickle out. "Have a lick at that juice."

"Be still my beating hand!" Obi-Wan's eyes were bright blue suns, they were so big, grinning slyly he said. "You're absolutely filthy Master."

"I've been saving it for you all day, Padawan," I asked as greedily. "Suck my stinking cock Obi-Wan! Lick my dirty crack!"

My talking really did it for him, Obi-Wan eyed my big bad saber so hard, a little vein popped on his forehead, pulsing in time to the thick ones in my cock.

* * * * *
Obi-Wan

So I swallowed my master's prod just like a good little paddlewan and had him moaning in delight.  Just because my ass was virginal, didn't mean my mouth didn't have a ton of experience.  I took his huge piece of meat all the way down my throat.  After I made sure he was sloppy wet, I leapt back to my feet.  Qui-Gon was panting heavily, like he had run a long hard race.  He looked down at me then kissed me, much like I hoped he would fuck me, hard and deep.  I moaned loudly, then broke off the kiss.  Turning my back to him, I leaned over the toilet, placing my hands against the wall.  Shoving my ass towards his throbbing manmeat, I urged him to fuck me.

"Master, Please!  I want you to bust my sweet cherry ass!"

* * * * * *
Qui-Gon

"Don't mind if I do!" I dropped to my hands and knees on the cold wet tiles and sank my teeth into a soft globe of his peachy boy arse. Coughing up some saliva, I pushed my drool into his tight little love-tunnel. My big strong tongue pushing open his pink rosebud and slurping up the bright yellow pollen about the heart of his pretty boy flower.

"Yes, Yes Master!"  Obi-Wan cried out in ecstasy.

"Be a good boy now, Obi-Wan," I take a hard pinch of his left nipple and push his face further into the cubicle wall. "Grab a hold of the water tank will you?"

* * * * *
Obi-Wan

My tool hardened with every swipe of his wonderful tongue  I writhed and begged for him to keep working his magic.  I never knew the beauty of man to man love until I had a real bear working my hot boy ass

"Yes, Master."  I crooned

I only hoped he was going to shove his hot meat up my little boypussy! I had waited too long for this moment, and obeyed my master without a second thought!

* * * * *
Qui-Gon

"Oh yes, slut, I'll show you man to man!" reading his thoughts across the bond I shouted, as I got him to straddle the seat of the toilet, with his hungry arse sticking out and his head resting on the half-flush button.

I ran my hands around his front and copped a good grope of my padawan's hard prick, taking it into my hands I gave it a big squeeze. At the same time, I aimed my big Sith Monster of a cock at his brown hole and started pushing.

"You're so fucking tight, Obi-Wan, loosen up!" I fondled his hairy balls sounding as sexy as can be.

* * * * *
Obi-Wan

"Argh!  It hurts, Master!  Pull it out!"  I screamed, he was too big for my precious ass.  I tried to wriggle away from his huge dick, but he kept plunging into my assguts with abandon!

But it wasn't coming out!  I was getting scared, maybe I wasn't man enough for master!

* * * * *
Qui-Gon

"No no! Qui-Worm wants that warm cave of yours! What's the matter with you?" I tried to steady his movements, only his wriggling got me as hard as ever. And fuck it, all the blood was in my cock, it was getting too hard to try and think. Suddenly, however, a thought struck me.

"Are you a virgin, Obi-Wan?" I asked. "Am I REALLY popping a cherry here?"

"Oh force, yes, I'm a virgin!  Why do you think I keep saying my ass is a cherry?"  he yelled frantically.

"Market appeal?" I hissed, deeply sorry that I had hurt his holy little arse.

* * * * *
Obi-Wan

"Bloody hell, Qui-Gon!"  I cried out...the ache was starting to go down.  Maybe we could do this.

* * * * *
Qui-Gon

"Oh poor Obi-Bunny! Don't think about my big Master prick if it hurts you! Concentrate on my hand! Think about my fingers caressing your gorgeous little dick, feel the friction!"

"Little Dick!  Master!  Not everyone's hung like a Bantha." he moaned. "you to stop calling my dick little"

Then Obi-Wan closed his bright blue eyes and breathed in deeply.

"And I still want you to fuck me Master," he said lowly, in his soft seductive voice. "I don't care if you jab me to death, I need...I want..."

Force, he's begging got me hotter than anything, precum gushed out of my dickhead. And his fighting spirit! Despite his deep guy-moans, I kept swiveling my hips, probing around inside his juicy canal.

"Ow, Qui-Gon!  Could you be a bit more gentle?" was my sorry reward.

But suddenly, I felt a little soft lump with the head of my cock and Obi-Wan suddenly became quiet.

* * * * *
Obi-Wan

My ass was on fire, wasn't he realizing the pain I was in? Suddenly, he hit something in me, just a little spot, but oh force!  It felt wonderful! I started moaning...begging for him to just keep brushing up against it.

"Oh, oh yeah, Qui!"

"You like it now don't you, Obi-Wan?" he pumped his hips hard, going way deep into my butt, slicing me open with good Qui-Gon loving.

It still hurt, but the pain was quickly going away, washed away by the little spot of electricity.  Master chuckled. Soon he started moving in slow, deep thrusts. It felt really good!  That must have been my prostate!

I felt my cum building in my nuts...Qui-Gon grabbed my meat and started jacking me off.

* * * * *
Qui-Gon

I was so fucking pleased with myself, that I pumped Obi-Wan for a good half an hour, we just kept fucking and fucking, his body writhing and bucking on the toilet seat, his his braid dipping into the water bowl then flying about, splattering water to refresh our faces.

At least two people came in to use the facilities during that time, but we didn't care, we just kept screaming for each other to go harder, to take it like a man, to fucking understand at last the Glory of The Force.

"Obi-Wan!" I gasped as I wank his meat. "I've been going for a good while here...you...think...you...could...cum?!"

* * * * *
Obi-Wan

"OOooh, Master!  Master!"  My nuts exploded all over the place, love juices hitting me on the chin, on my stomach, all over Master's hand, and finally my pisshole drooled it's last bit of cum into the toilet.  Sweaty with exertion, my hand slipped on the handle, flushing away my torrential release.  Qui's hand pumped everything out of me.

* * * * *
Qui-Gon

"ARRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHH!" I came too.

It was good.

It was fucking brilliant.

Obi-Wan moaned and moved awkwardly on the toilet seat to allow me to pull out him. As my cock was uncorked, a thick sluice of my white love nectar oozed out of his asshole, dripping down from his anus into the toilet bowl. Grabbing his sated body by his hips, I pulled his ass crack over my mouth and licked up the last few drops of my own cum.

"Mmmmmm..." I say to my slut padawan. "Tell me, was that good for you?"

* * * * *
Obi-Wan

"Um, Master?"  I squirmed uncomfortably.  Did he think I was going to kiss him after he did that?

"I think I need to get to my quarters, now"  I was terribly uncomfortable, I thought.  How do I tell him he's an awful lay?

My ass hurt again, and though I loved Master, he wasn't the fuck of my life...

* * * * *
Qui-Gon

"Shhh, Padawan, is that a knocking on our love cubicle door?" I bent down and peeked out under the door and caught sight of a pair of lovely boots.

 "Oh look it's Valorum!" I yelled with happy surprise and wrenched open the door, gesturing for him to come in. "I've got my Padawan in here, wanna share?"

* * * * *
Obi-Wan

"Oh, force."

I turned and saw the silver-haired supreme chancellor smile wickedly.  He looked like his cock was nice and normal...at least that's all I could tell from the moderate erection in his blue robes.  Alright, maybe Valorum can be the fuck of my life.  I took one look at master, one look at the eager eyed chancellor, then leapt off of the toilet.

"Chancellor!  How lovely it is to see you again!  I have something big I'd love to share with you in my quarters."  I said, grabbing him by the arm and leading him away from Master.

"I live to serve, young Padawan!"  The Chancellor perked up and said.

Maybe HE was the fuck of my life?

* * * * *
Qui-Gon

He'll be back! I thought as I watched the slut Padawan disappear with the horny politician. No one EVER gets a taste of the Living Force and doesn't come back begging for more. It's just a matter of time. I smile smugly. In the meanwhile, I decided to hide myself in the cubicles, someone is bound to come in here soon. And I intend to make a night of it.

The End, Thank the Force :)

Jade:  Yikes...well, I told you all it was a parody, stop glaring at me!  I certainly hope this doesn't change anyone's high opinion of me!  Yeah, right;)

P.S. For clarification purposes of the authorship of the more gruesome passages in this story here is an extract of the AIM conversation we had whilst writing the toilet-fucking scene. All in all it says: Jade is sick, largely because of coercion from Boots.  <Jade:  Well, at least she admits it!>
Jadee555:  um, they're standing, not on the toilet, <grin>
botherboots: NOO!! They've got to do it on the toilet!
Jadee555: ewwwwww!
botherboots: I've got this great joke lined up, when Obi-Wan comes, their thrashing pushes the flush button and the cum gets all flushed down the loo.
Jadee555: but that positions' not bloody possible...But they can flush his cum down if they stand...
botherboots: Yes, it is. *g* You can SO do it like that on toilets!
Jadee555: unless these 2 really have a fetish for toilets, <g>
Jadee555:   okay, show me<g>
botherboots: *giggle* are you insinuating *I* have a toilet fixation?
Jadee555: Hmmmm...I dunno if I want to go there
botherboots: Think of the toilet as a chair.
Jadee555: ::shudder::
botherboots: Obi-Wan is sitting on it, hugging the back, Qui's fucking him up the arse. How normal can you get?
Jadee555: those bathrooms better be clean!
botherboots: LOL!! They're GUYS! they don't care!
Jadee555: I don't think normal applies here.
botherboots: LOL!
botherboots: Come on Jade, when we post it, I'll own up to the toilet fetish.
botherboots: There, that makes you feel better?
Jadee555: bloody fine, then, obi's sitting on a coldporcelain toilet about to get it up the arse. Okay, as long as you own up to it:-)
botherboots: *g* you can have your male preg, I can have my toilets :-)
Jadee555: I don't like male preg, you know that!  LOL!
botherboots: LOL!
botherboots: And I don't like slash *roll eyes*