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Nothing in the Dark - continued

(continued from part 5)

Mekall lay across Obi-Wan, trying to summon enough energy and sense of self to move. His brain and his body were in no mood to cooperate. Feeling it across their bond, Obi-Wan chuckled low in his belly, causing an erotic ripple to pass through Mekall.

"Don't bother," Obi-Wan said lazily.

Good thinking, Mekall sent back blearily in his mental voice before he slipped into sleep.

When Mekall awoke, Obi-Wan was propped up on one elbow watching him, his eyes hooded and a smile playing over his lips.

"Morning," the Jedi purred.

"Morning," Mekall replied. "You all right?"

Obi-Wan's smile grew mischevious. Mekall could not help responding in kind. He leaned over and kissed Obi-Wan deeply.

If bonding was going to feel this good, the rest of the galaxy and everything in it could go to the hells. In the midst of this thought, Obi-Wan's stomach rumbled loudly. Their kiss disintegrated as Obi-Wan succumbed to laughter.

"Hungry?" Mekall inquired, perfectly straight faced.

Obi-Wan gave him a quick nip.

As they left the bed, Obi-Wan's nose wrinkled a bit. "How long have we been in here?"

Mekall grabbed two bathing robes, both his, from the closet. They were clean and since both men were far from it, they headed, still undressed, to the 'fresher. They showered separately - in the interest of finishing before they had to start again - donned the robes and went downstairs.

Yls and Lure were in the galley. Lure, betrayal in his eyes, said something unintelligible and left the room. Mekall, too content to be bothered by the Niadan's disgruntlement, wrapped Obi-Wan's arm around his shoulder and took him to the icebox. They began foraging through it together.

Yls got up and walked to the entryway. He waited to see if Mekall would look up. When he did not, the healer said, "Mekall, I need to talk to you. "

"So talk," Mekall said, ready for but feeling immune to a rebuke. He emerged from the icebox with a piece of fruit between his teeth, holding a food container he had picked up from the shelf. He placed it atop a small pile of foodstuffs they had heaped into Obi-Wan's arm.

Taking a bite from the pa'al in his mouth, Mekall angled around Obi-Wan to go to the food lockers. Obi-Wan moved to the table to unload their haul. It was then that he noticed the healer's expression. He went to Mekall and spoke close to his ear. Mekall straightened up, handed over some bread rolls he had found, grazed his lips over Obi-Wan's mouth and turned to the healer.

"If you're going to start in on me again -" Mekall began.

"I'm not. It's not that. It. Not that . . . way. I -"

"Oh, spit it out, Yls," Mekall cut him off.

Yls, unable to think of any way to cushion what he had to say, blurted, "Hilty."

Mekall looked as if he had struck him. Gods, he had completely forgotten about Hilty.

"He's overdue, Mekall. Three days. I've tried to com him. Lure has too, but . . . no one's seen or heard from him. For days."

Mekall paled visibly and took a seat. Obi-Wan went to him.

"Three days," Mekall repeated thinly.

"Where is he coming from?" Obi-Wan asked.

"A work shift," Yls answered.

"Is he generally on time?"

"You can set your chrono by him," Mekall said flatly.

Obi-Wan took his hand. Mekall slid his hand out of Obi-Wan's and looked at him, bereft. "Three days, Obi-Wan. Three days and I never . . . "

"Mekall," Obi-Wan implored him, "don't do this to yourself. It's not your fault."

"Whose fault is it then?" Mekall asked, the harsh mask that had been missing for the past days coming back over his features.

"It's no one's fault. Things are as they are."

"Sounds good, Obi-Wan, but it doesn't work like that out here," Mekall said, standing and crossing to Yls. "I have to go," Mekall told him.

"Of course," Obi-Wan responded, "We'll find him."

Mekall gave him a sharp look. Obi-Wan met the look evenly.

"No," Mekall refuted.

"Why?" Obi-Wan asked.

"Because you can't go where I'm going, where I have to go."

"Dharuje," Obi-Wan picked the name from his thoughts.

"Yes," Mekall confirmed.

"I want to go," Obi-Wan insisted.

"No."

"I need to. I need to see -"

"No," Mekall repeated firmly. "I won't let you."

"What are you prepared to do to stop me?" Obi-Wan challenged, his eyes flashing.

Mekall met Obi-Wan's eyes briefly. He had no time for this. He wanted to and could protect the Jedi but if he was determined to be a fool, Mekall was not going to waste time bickering with him about it.

Obi-Wan thought Mekall was going to argue. Instead Mekall said, "Fine," as though it was a curse and left. Obi-Wan watched him go down the hall to the workshop, then went upstairs to dress.

As Mekall walked into the shop, he encountered a wave of resentment. Lure might well be hating his guts, but the Niadan would walk through fire for Hilty and that would be enough, for now.

Mekall and Lure exchanged terse words. While Lure prepped the ship, Mekall dressed then checked their weaponry. When he and Lure were ready, Obi-Wan appeared as if on cue.

It seemed to Mekall that Obi-Wan looked almost remade: strong, determined, sure of himself. He could not help wondering how much of it was facade. The backbone that took struck a chord and Mekall approached him.

"You don't have to do this."

"Yes," Obi-Wan responded with absolute certainty. "I do."

Lure came in from the hangar bearing three sets of outdoor gear. They put on the breathers, but Mekall remembered Yls, pulled his breather down from his face and headed back into the house.

Yls was in the study listening to the 'net, which he had tuned to the newsfeed.

"Not likely to be on the broadcast," Mekall said, widely missing the jesting tone he was aiming for.

Yls looked at him, his pain evident. "I didn't know what to do. You and Obi-Wan had to . . . had to finish . . . "

"Not your fault," Mekall stated. "We're . . ." he made a going gesture. "As soon as we find out . . ." That thought trailed off and he walked out of the room.

"Not your fault either," Yls told his disappearing back, though he knew Mekall most likely did not hear him.

The trip to Dharuje's was short but fraught with tension. Mekall's sense of impending danger increased exponentially as they got closer to the Ecenian's dwelling. He knew Obi-Wan must be feeling it too, though one could not tell from looking at him.

The foreboding was borne out as the house came into view. All the doors had been left open allowing its atmosphere to escape. Mekall could discern nothing alive in the vicinity.

Lure's military training kicked in. He got out of the hovercraft first, scoped out the area, then gave the others the signal for all clear. Mekall got out next, making sure Obi-Wan ended up between himself and Lure. Long used to working side by side in action, Lure assumed a stance back to the other two men, covering the rear.

They entered through Dharuje's showroom, where Mekall had first seen Obi-Wan. Mekall went ahead, made sure it was safe and waved the others in. Although Obi-Wan did not remember being there, he hesitated at the entrance. The darkness inside was palpable to him.

Half the suite was dominated by the large table at which Mekall had played the Ecenian. It was now upended. Gaming sets and wager chips were scattered over the floor, afloat in a layer of watery grey-brown muck.

After giving the room a once over, Lure tipped a sign to Mekall and moved out to check the house's interior.

Mekall initiated a closer inspection of the rest of the showroom, which was filled with a tumble of storage cubes, boxes, cages and containers that held Dharuje's stock. All of it had been broken into and left tipped every which way in what Mekall read as a bad attempt to make this destruction look like a robbery. Too much of value had been destroyed or left behind for it to have truly been one.

Several qordn lay broken across the remains of a crumpled habitat, killed by the loss of their native atmospheric mix. A kest was dead on the floor, its bright, trailing tail plumage arrayed in discordant splendor over the debris scattered around it.

How easily treasure turns to garbage, Mekall thought, as he surveyed the wreckage, sifting through here and there with the tip of his rifle. Dharuje had the wealth to buy almost anything. Here, at last, was a price he could not afford to pay.

Across the room, Obi-Wan's hard-won composure was beginning to unravel. The aura of decay, waste and abuse was pervasive. It seemed to be seeping under his skin. He had thought coming here would help him begin to deal with what had happened. Instead, he felt the room was closing in on him.

He had to get out of there. He took a rash step toward the exit and his boot toe lodged in something on the floor. Glancing down, he found a bloated, speckled creature, very large, very round and very dead.

Obi-Wan's abrupt standstill brought Mekall to him. He came up behind him and stopped in his tracks.

"It's Dharuje," Mekall said.

Dharuje.

That took a few seconds to sink in, as though Obi-Wan's brain had received it but did not want to process it. Dharuje. This was, had been . . .

Obi-Wan began to tremble as fear and loathing battled for dominance. He wanted to run until his lungs and his legs gave out. He wanted to set on the thing and pummel its corpse into a bloody pile of rotting flesh. He wanted to cry or scream, or both. He could only stand there in impotent despair.

Qui-Gon's image came into his mind. He had not been seeking it, but having found it, Obi-Wan felt the familiar comfort of it like a balm. Don't lose yourself in fighting the emotion, padawan. Allow yourself to feel it. Your pain is real, but also do not lose yourself to it. Acknowledge, accept and cope. Don't sow seed where nothing can grow. Release your feelings to the Force. It will guide your way.

This, the attack, this dead body, this was not his life, Obi-Wan reminded himself. There was life before and there is life after. But there is only light if you allow yourself to come out of the darkness. With a stranglehold on his reason, he made himself catalog Dharuje into his memory. This had to be faced. There would be no second chance.

Mekall moved next to Obi-Wan to get a clearer view. Was this how he too would have ended up? As much as he had been hating Dharuje these past days, it had not always been so. They had been business rivals, occasional coconspirators, hells, even friends. He had spent half his life expecting to die much like this. Until Hilty . . .

The two men stood staring at the grey mottled body, both striving to make the past meet and reconcile with the present.

"The rest of the house is clear, but I don't think we should stick around," Lure's voice crackled from the comlink hanging off Mekall's belt.

That brought Mekall out of his thoughts. "Obi-Wan?" he faced the Jedi.

It took the younger man a few more seconds to pull himself together. "I'm all right," he said quietly, not taking his eyes off the corpse.

Lure came up behind them.

"It's not safe here." Mekall turned Obi-Wan away from the corpse. Not that Obi-Wan did not know that, but it seemed to need saying. The group moved to the door. Lure went out first, checked the path back to the ship, then gestured to the others.

Without needing to ask, Lure piloted the ship into Qasch.

Dharuje would have been the quick, dirty road to information. He had known pretty much everyone and everything worth knowing on Larral. If he did not personally know or have what you needed, he knew someone who did. It was, no doubt, what had gotten him killed. Now they would have to take the slow, dirtier path. Lure and Mekall each trolled one side of the city's main drag for any word or trace of Hilty's whereabouts. Obi-Wan stayed with Mekall, keeping up well in Mekall's estimation, given what he had been through and the short time he had been back on his feet. In truth, Obi-Wan was near the end of his rope, but knowing time was of the essence, he gravely held his own.

Hours later they had not turned up anyone who could give them a lead. That, in and of itself, made Mekall more edgy than he had already been. The trip home was grimly silent.

Back at Mekall's, Lure secured the speeder. Obi-Wan preceded Mekall into the house, stopping him just inside the door between the hangar and the workshop.

Mekall was ready to wave him off, but their eyes met and the hardness in his dissipated.

"It's not your fault," Obi-Wan repeated his earlier claim. "I know," Mekall admitted this time.

Obi-Wan leaned in and pressed his lips between Mekall's. Despite his self-loathing, Mekall was badly in need of the contact. He met the kiss, remaining cheek to cheek afterward for a minute, then led the way into the house.

Yls was waiting for them outside the study door. The look on his face plunged Mekall back into self-castigation. Obi-Wan's brow furrowed at the mental reverberation.

"What is it?" Mekall asked, as he and Obi-Wan trailed Yls into the study.

Yls walked over to the com unit and activated the playback. Hilty's likeness coalesced on screen. He was bound to a chair, bruised and bloody. One of his eyes was swollen shut. He quickly cast the other downward.

"Look up," an off-screen voice ordered in the local street parlance.

Hilty looked up. Lure came into the room as Mekall stared paralytically at the screen for the endless seconds before Hilty's picture was replaced by static. "Came this morning," Yls said, picking up a reader. Mekall grabbed it from him callously.

It read: You have something I want. Now I have something you want. A prompt exchange will insure that your property is returned to you in a salvageable condition. I await your reply. ~Tallo

Having read it, Mekall threw the reader on the table and stalked out of the room. Obi-Wan picked it up and read it. After trading a look with Yls, he went to find Mekall.

"I wouldn't," Lure cautioned as he departed.

Mekall, Obi-Wan opened their mental link. There was no answer.

"Mekall," Obi-Wan called out as he got to the top of the stairs. Still getting no response, Obi-Wan tracked the sound of movement to the workout room. Mekall was standing beside the heavybag, hands raised halfway between striking and withdrawing. On the wall in front of him there was dirt, blood smudges and a hole where Mekall had punched right through the top-layer.

"Mekall," Obi-Wan said again. When Mekall still did not answer, Obi-Wan approached and touched the back of his arm. Mekall swung around with a feral look in his eyes, breathing hard.

Obi-Wan did not flinch. "Mekall, stop it. Stop and think."

"I've done too much thinking. Don't you see where thinking's got me?" Mekall sneered, stepping closer. Obi-Wan stood his ground, meeting the flinty anger with steely resolve. Mekall backed off and left the room.

Obi-Wan pursued him into his bedroom. "We'll find him," he said, closing the distance between them. Mekall's back was to him. He placed a hand on Mekall's shoulder.

"We'll save him," Obi-Wan reiterated. He turned Mekall with a gentle touch and was surprised to see Mekall's face looked stricken rather than angry. His eyes were closed. Hurt and confusion knotted his brow.

Obi-Wan took him into his arms. Mekall bent to rest his head against Obi-Wan's shoulder but remained stiff, as if resisting his inclination. Obi-Wan held him but dare not tighten his grip, so certain was he that Mekall would flee. Instead he experimentally tried to impart comfort through their bond, not yet sure what was within its latitude and what was not.

Mekall's breathing evened out at last and he let himself relax. After a few minutes, he took a deep breath, straightened up and looked into Obi-Wan's face, his expression a mix of amazement, gratitude and guilt.

"Who is he?" Obi-Wan asked.

"Tallo Thaan?" Mekall replied. "Just another local sportsman. Scion of a powerful family. He's high up in the planetary echelon."

"You know him."

"I used to work for him."

"Then you know where he is."

"I know where he lives but I haven't been there in . . . years. I don't know the set up anymore, his security -"

"I do," Lure piped up from the doorway, startling them both. Their preoccupation had muted their awareness.

Mekall, disturbed by Lure having seen him in what he perceived as weakness, went into the corner to compose himself.

"My wife's brother did some work up there last cycle," Lure volunteered, unaffected by Mekall's reaction. "Nothing's changed much. It's still wrapped up tighter than Tarsharren's Gate. But he's guarding against an invasion, not two -"

Obi-Wan shot him a look.

"Three," Lure grudgingly corrected, "guys with side arms. We can get in there."

Mekall faced him, still looking unusally rattled.

Lure knew how to motivate him. "Tallo doesn't think you'll fight, y'know. He thinks you'll sit here hiding in the dark and crawl up there and hand over the Jedi when he says to. He thinks you've gone coward."

Mekall appeared ready to charge the Niadan, but saw Lure was only being truthful and direct. His words held no animosity.

"He's waiting," Lure went on, "for a message back, for submission. He thinks he's runnin' the show. He won't expect action."

Mekall looked from Obi-Wan to Lure and back, finding his confidence regenerating from theirs. "Maybe we could get in there," he thought aloud. He began to walk. The Jedi and the Niadan watched him lap the wall three times. He stopped within arm's reach of Obi-Wan, but addressed Lure. "Fast and light. In and out. If we do this right, we'll be gone before they know we were there. Is the ship ready?"

"What do you think?" Lure half smiled and left to make it so.

Obi-Wan went to Mekall. He lifted his hand to run his thumb across Mekall's cheek. Mekall caught it and entwined their fingers. Obi-Wan rubbed his fingers lightly over Mekall's bloodied knuckles, concentrating healing into the pass.

Mekall smiled sadly, "I'm -"

Obi-Wan shook his head. An apology was unnecessary, thanks went without saying and anything else would have sounded too much like an explanation Obi-Wan did not want or need.

"We're going to get him," Mekall told Yls. He had sent Obi-Wan ahead to the hangar while he stopped in the study. Mekall crossed to the wall safe and keyed in its combination.

"Mm," Yls responded knowingly.

Mekall went to a cabinet, pulled out a case, walked back over to the safe and began to fill the bag. There was hard currency and some gems, several backup storage drives, a few small mementos.

"Afterward, I'll have to leave," he spoke while he worked. "You should, but I know you won't. Hilty can be hidden. Lure will take care of him. If I'm off planet, there's no incentive for Tallo to retaliate. He's petty and vindictive, but he has much more to lose than to he would have to gain. He thought this was a win-win, humiliate me and the Jedi, bonus points for profit to be made, but pursuing it would be folly and he's not stupid."

"No," Yls agreed.

"We need to go, now,"" Mekall told him. "There are a few things from the house Hilty will want."

"I can do that."

Mekall finished emptying the safe. "Where should we meet?" he asked.

"Do you remember Sarasgahl's?"

"Yeah, that'll do," Mekall replied with a small shake of his head at the recollection. He closed the bag and walked over to the terminal, booting it up and punching in a series of commands. In a matter of minutes, Mekall finished wiping the system clean.

He turned to Yls, holding out the case. "If we don't get back, this is yours."

Yls took the case, looking abashed. Mekall walked away.

"We'll get back," Mekall informed him from the doorway with something akin to a smile.

Obi-Wan was waiting in the workshop. Mekall went to the system in there and booted it up. He typed in the commands which prompted its memory to erase itself, then walked over to a stud in the wall on the other side of the room. It activated a hidden panel which opened to reveal a second safe.

"You know how to use a blaster?" Mekall asked as he rummaged inside. "Of course you know how to use a blaster," he answered himself as he transferred some of the contents of the safe into his case.

"Never mind," he said as he withdrew a long, slim, silvery metallic cylinder which he handed to Obi-Wan.

"Is that your -"

"No," Mekall replied. "Built this one a couple of years ago. To see if I still could."

Obi-Wan hefted the hilt, testing its weight and balance. It was not his, but it was not a bad fit. He reversed it back to front and extended it to Mekall.

"You," Mekall said.

Obi-Wan took stock of Mekall's face, then stepped into the clear space by the worktable and ignited the lightsaber. It glowed to life with the familiar snap-hiss, the translucent white blade tinted a metallic gold cast. It felt good to hold it, right in a way little had of late.

Lure heard the sound of the lightsaber deploying as he came back to the workshop. He didn't know what the sound was for sure, but he knew a weapon when he heard one. How had someone penetrated their defenses? He hesitated for only an instant's preparation, then drew his blaster and bolted around the corner, poised to fire.

Mekall and Obi-Wan both started as Lure barreled through the door. Only finely honed reflexes kept him from firing. He stopped short and stood frowning his remonstration. Collecting himself, he clicked his safety on, scowled, said, "Ready," and turned to go back out to the hangar. "You oughta be more careful with that thing," he grumbled as he left.

Obi-Wan doused the blade with a chagrined look. Mekall smiled. Even in the midst of this madness, there were moments that you just had to. He wondered how the hells he had gotten into this.

Obi-Wan clipped the lightsaber to his belt and followed Lure into the hangar.

Mekall went back to the computer, flipped a final switch and the machine whirred into stillness. There was business to be done. Payback to be doled out. There might be a lot about the present situation that was beyond Mekall's control, but retribution was not.

Mekall left his house all but completely intact. He wanted it to look like they were there or they would be back soon, should anyone be watching or come looking. Night was falling as Lure piloted the speeder out of the compound. In his head, Mekall put that in the 'things in their favor' column, along with the element of surprise and the fact that Tallo Thaan did not understand the concept of a moral decision, much less that Mekall's getting out of the business had been one. They discussed the plan en route. As Mekall had expected, Lure was quick to agree to sheltering Hilty.

Lure took them to the security perimeter of Tallo Thaan's estate. The two men debarked wordlessly. Mekall led to an overgrown path, up a slope and around to a side entrance. There he intentionally triggered a sensor alarm. When two guards came out to search for the intruder, he and Obi-Wan stole inside.

Mekall and Obi-Wan sprinted down twisting corridors until they came upon a rectangle of light spilling out into the hallway ahead. Mekall indicated that was where Hilty was being held. The door to the room was protected by two forcefields. These allowed entry while keeping the cell oxygenated for the captive. They did not want Hilty dead, not yet. A large Larralar stood watch on either side of the door. They were enjoying the last of a joke one had told the other. Popular music was playing over the feed.

Mekall gave Obi-Wan time to center, taking the opportunity to do the same himself. Although Obi-Wan was shielding, Mekall could sense the Jedi was bothered. Obi-Wan found the hold uncomfortably similar to the place where he had first been held prisoner.

When Mekall was ready, he banked a lungful of air, pulled down his breathing gear and stepped out before Obi-Wan could stop him.

"There's no hostile here," Mekall intoned in Larrai. "It's time for you to take a break." The guards holstered their weapons and walked away. Reckless, Obi-Wan thought. Nevertheless, he had to admire Mekall's nerve, and his skill.

Mekall slid his breather back over his nose and mouth, deactivated the first forcefield and went in. Obi-Wan hung back, prepared to rescue Mekall if need be. His decision to stay out of the cell wavered as time passed and Mekall and Hilty did not come out.

Obi-Wan checked the passage. It was empty. He crossed, catching sight of Hilty, bloody and barely conscious, hanging from wrist chains. Doing his best to disregard a potentially immobilizing flashback, Obi-Wan stepped up to the doorway. His personal demons vanished as he saw Mekall standing over a third guard. The guard was kneeling on the floor, his eyes glazed over, his weapon primed and pressed firmly to his chest ready to blast his own heart out at Mekall's command.

Obi-Wan deactivated the first forcefield, stepped between the two, reset the first and turned off the second. Touching Mekall's thoughts, although he was sure Mekall knew he was there, he passed through the second field. He reactivated it and went directly to Hilty's side, drawing the saber and setting it to low to cut Hilty down. Mekall's eyes met his, hard and cold as any he had ever seen, but Mekall did not move. He still held the guard in thrall.

"In and out, quick and quiet, Mekall," Obi-Wan said, allowing himself a modicum of empowering annoyance. There was no leeway here for wounded pride or misplaced indignation."Your words."

The right chain broke and Hilty half swung to rest against him. He started on the left side.

"If you feel it's essential to commit suicide," Obi-Wan continued as the left chain gave way and he caught Hilty as he slumped forward, "after we get Hilty to safety you could always come back."

Feeling as small as Obi-Wan had intended him to, Mekall settled for striking the guard over the head with the butt of his blaster. The guard fell to the floor.

Mekall went to Obi-Wan's side to take Hilty as he began to come to. Mekall put his hand across Hilty's lips to keep him quiet. He took the extra breather from his pack, putting it over Hilty's nose and mouth. Hilty looked at him with wounded, doleful eyes while Mekall pulled his breather back on.

Obi-Wan put his breathing gear on, went to the doorway, turned off the force fields and checked that the path was clear for their retreat. They reached the exit without being challenged. Obi-Wan went out first. He surveyed the area, then signaled Mekall who brought Hilty out. They headed toward the ship, where Lure was waiting.

Suddenly, a guard appeared out of the woods. Obi-Wan flew into action, igniting his lightsaber, coming up behind Hilty and Mekall, deflecting the guard's shots back at him with deadly accuracy until the pair disappeared into the trees. Obi-Wan retraced their steps and did the same.

Lights and alarms began going off all over the compound within seconds, but they were in the speeder and out of the area before effective counter measures could be mounted.

Content to have Hilty back with them, Lure concentrated on flying. Next to him, Obi-Wan was trying to stay out of Mekall's head and keep from plummeting into a morass of evoked memory. He latched onto the reassurance that the focus and adrenaline of being in action, even briefly, had provided. In the back, Mekall was unsuccessfully trying to minister, in what slight ways he could while in transit, to an unnervingly resistant Hilty.

They flew to the safehouse Yls had secured. The healer was waiting for them outside. As Hilty limped toward the house without accepting Mekall's help, Lure got to work placing warning sensors around the area. Obi-Wan remained outside to give Mekall and Hilty some time.

When the security arrangements were complete, Lure parked the speeder in the hangar next to Yls' vehicle and readied it for its next flight. If everything went according to plan, they would be out of there by dawn. Squinting back out through the hangar doors at Obi-Wan, Lure thought he looked kind of lost standing by himself. He had not been liking the Jedi much of late, but could not help feeling a little sorry for him.

The trip in was arduous. Hilty almost fell twice before he grudgingly let Mekall put his arm around him. Yls went ahead to show Hilty the way. When they made it to the bedroom at last, Hilty broke away from Mekall and sat on the bed with a grimace.

"Jedi's still here," he said.

"Hil -" Startled, Mekall looked at him in dismay.

"Of all the times you had to pick to get involved," Hilty said. "How could you? With one of them? After everything you told me they did to you -" Needing to stop to breathe, Hilty looked at Mekall reproachfully with the eye that would open. "You knew."

"No," Mekall refuted.

"You knew," Hilty repeated acidly.

"I told you -"

"You never."

Yls stepped between them, blocking Mekall from Hilty's view. "Lie down and shut up, okay," he said, provocatively gruff to diffuse the tension. "Let me see what parts of you I'm going to have to sew back on."

Hilty complied, letting Yls help him onto the bed. Yls got Hilty out of his clothes so that he could examine him. As he began to clean and bandage Hilty's wounds, he spoke softly to him, too softly for Mekall, who had moved from the bedside into the room's low-ceilinged corner to hear.

Mekall strove to gather his thoughts to explain, to reason with Hilty. Before he could, Yls succeeded in talking Hilty to sleep. While the healer collected up the debris from his first aid, Mekall stood absentmindedly knocking his boot heel against the molding.

"Mekall, you need to do what you need to do," the healer advised.

"That would be?" Mekall retorted.

"Are you kidding?"

Mekall shrugged at him.

"Look," Yls said, "you're about the last person I ever thought I'd say these words to, but listen to your heart."

Mekall would have been no more astounded if a gaping crater had opened up in front of him. Unable to connect any of his rapidly multiplying slivers of thought together into a sentence, he pushed off from the wall and left the room. The next obstacle was waiting for him in the hallway.

"Maybe you should let it be," Lure confronted him.

"What part of you thinks I could do that?" Mekall asked, knowing Lure only meant to spare Hilty any additional pain.

Lure looked at him disdainfully and turned to leave.

"Don't go," Mekall pleaded.

"Why?" Lure ground out, stopping several steps away to turn around to face Mekall.

"I want to thank you, for what you're doing," Mekall said.

"I ain't doing it for you," Lure assured him.

"I know."

"Is that it?"

"No."

"Then what? What do you want? What do you want from me?" the Niadan shouted, advancing on Mekall.

"Lure, I . . . I'm trying to apologize," Mekall said.

Lure's frown deepened.

"I don't why I didn't know," Mekall explained. "I don't think I could've stopped it if I did know. If I got to choose -"

"You did choose," Lure argued.

"Yes. I chose," Mekall responded, equally emphatic. "I chose you. I chose Hilty. What we made. How we made it. That was what I wanted. When we decided we didn't want it anymore, we got out. We made the choice and made it work. For him, for you and your family, for ourselves. To live. To . . . live. Why does this negate all of that?"

"I'd think that'd be pretty obvious."

"That simple for you, is it?"

Lure stared him down. "Look what I see is you and that kid . . . and Hilty's - he ends up half . . . You can't tell me you didn't know what you were doing -"

"I wouldn't -"

"Then what do you expect, after everything. After watchin' you for the past two weeks. You're like a stranger. A stranger who's f -" Lure stopped before he said something that would add to their regrets of their years together ending this way.

"I can't - I won't accept what -" Lure continued. "Look, Mekall. When there's you and there's Hilty and that's not the same thing . . . I don't know whose side I'm on."

"I don't know how you could, Lu. I don't even know whose side I'm on," Mekall confided.

Lure's anger lost its immediacy in the face of Mekall's unexpected honesty.

"But I do know," Mekall added, "I never meant to betray Hilty. I ran an errand for him, so I could get laid before he went back to work. That's all. You know how he is. He couldn't get his mind off the boy. I never . . . I . . . never . . ."

Mekall looked so tired and forlorn. Lure sighed and shook his head.

"I wouldn't have made it without you, Lu," Mekall said. "Likewise, " Lure replied. He reached down to clasp Mekall's forearm in the planet's demimonde version of a handshake. Mekall grasped the Niadan's forearm hard in return. It was as close to an apology as Lure was going to give and as close to accepting one from Mekall as he was going to get.

"If we want to make it any farther," Lure offered, "I'd better finish up with the ship." He took a last look at Mekall and walked off.

Mekall found Obi-Wan in a room down the hall. He was sitting on the bed in the midst of trying to remove his borrowed boots.

Obi-Wan looked up, embarrassed. "They're a little -"

"Small?" Mekall finished as he joined Obi-Wan on the bed.

Obi-Wan smiled. "How is he?"

"They worked him over pretty good," Mekall replied, "but I don't think there's any long term damage. He fell asleep. Yls is with him."

"And you?"

"I have no idea."

Mekall got up and went to the window, but looked at the floor rather than outside.

Obi-Wan went to him.

"I have to take you back," Mekall said after a silence.

"Back?" Obi-Wan asked, disconcerted.

"You weren't planning on going back?"

"Well, yes, I was . . ."

"Obi-Wan, why haven't you tried to contact Coruscant?"

Obi-Wan did not answer for long enough that Mekall thought he might not.

"I can't. I don't want . . . I can't."

"You can't?"

"I, I can. I don't want t - I feel . . . all this . . . turmoil I haven't been able to . . . control. I'm not - If I can't control myself . . . I don't - I didn't, don't, want him, them, to know what I've been - " Obi-Wan stopped, feeling ludicrous.

"You ought to listen to your own advice," Mekall said.

Obi-Wan looked at him blankly.

"About blame. It wasn't your fault."

"Easy to give advice," Obi-Wan said, "harder to take it."

"Especially your own," Mekall agreed.

Obi-Wan smiled shyly.

"I should know," Mekall went on, "I'm standing here, with you with my guts hanging out. In the next room there's a man I thought I . . . He might've died."

Obi-Wan put his hand on Mekall's shoulder. Mekall turned to him. Obi-Wan ran his palm over Mekall's cheek. They joined in a kiss which Mekall initiated then broke from as if he had been scalded.

"Don't," Mekall objected, turning back to the window. "I thought . . . I thought I loved Hilty. I made changes to find a life that could be something other than brutal, profitable and short. I wanted what he had, what we had, how I was when I was with him. This, with you, what I feel with you . . ."

Mekall faced Obi-Wan. "He made me able to feel safe. For the first time in so many years that I didn't know what the feeling was at first and I rejected it. With you, it's like walking into fire. Fire I've already been burned by. I know the danger that lies that way and it doesn't matter. What I feel for you makes everything else irrelevant. It burns with a passion I thought existed only in bad holovids and antiquated fic -"

Obi-Wan cut Mekall off with an all-consuming kiss. The doubt within Mekall gave way to a wave of need and desire.

Still connected, they sank to the floor, struggling to unclothe one another quickly enough. When they were nude, Mekall pulled Obi-Wan to him ungently. They dove into heated lovemaking as if ardor and will could expel what would drive them apart if the world went back to making sense. The connection between them was not to be denied.

Mekall caressed Obi-Wan's cock and balls with his mouth feeling as though he was evaporating beneath the heat of the hands on his back. He brought Obi-Wan to completion, taking all of his seed hungrily. At the last, he let some of the semen spill into his hand. He spread Obi-Wan's legs apart and began applying firm, wet pressure to his anus with his tongue, skirting the entrance, then following with coated fingers, turning Obi-Wan's fevered moan to a sharp intake of breath.

Before Obi-Wan had the chance to recover, Mekall slid up and entered him, driving almost desperately into the tight, hot channel. Obi-Wan gasped, but Mekall did not need to hesitate this time as the younger man's concupiscence sang through their bond.

Obi-Wan wrapped his arms around Mekall as tightly as he could, physically willing away any space between them. Mekall laughed lightly and pushed back, raising himself to look at Obi-Wan's face. Their eyes locked as they glided into a shared stream of pleasure. Mekall began stroking in and out of Obi-Wan, finding his prostate again and again. Sparks fired behind Obi-Wan's eyes and the amplified circle of arousal encompassed both men until their mutual climax whited out all thought and vision.

Obi-Wan woke alone on the bed with a blanket over him. Looking around, he found that Mekall had cleaned up the floor and left his clothes neatly folded at the bottom of the bed. He dressed and went to locate the others.

Mekall was sitting at Hilty's bedside, practically lulled to sleep by the quiet, familiar regularity of Hilty's soft snoring.

Obi-Wan crouched down in front of the chair, watching Mekall. Looking at him helped assuage the remorse Obi-Wan was feeling about not trying to contact Qui-Gon. It had all been moving so fast, but he knew he was only using that as an excuse. He did not want his Master to know what had happened to him. He did not want anyone else to know.

Logically, he understood that it was not his fault, but he could not get past the idea that who he was as much as what he was had been responsible for the what had befallen him. After all, it was he they had abducted, not his master. It was he who had been collared, cuffed and mounted like a trophy beast.

In a way it had been better before he remembered what he was. Less painful. But, no, that was not true either. Not being able to remember had left him at wit's end. It seemed in all this the only saving grace was Mekall.

All that had happened between the two of them might be madness, but he thought not. Surely the Force had brought them together. The fact that it was not a path either of them would have envisioned in their wildest imaginings did not mean it was the wrong one. Hearts and minds had been rended and redeemed. That was not to be taken lightly. He might have died, might have gone insane, might never have come back to himself, if not for the chances Mekall had taken time and again since freeing him.

What of Mekall? It had been a long journey for him. So much darkness on this world; in his life. Yet he had not succumbed, he had not gone over. Had instead fought to come back to the light, conquering his fears and the tenets they had taught him to live by.

Mekall opened his eyes. Seeing Obi-Wan, he looked away. Obi-Wan touched his knee, drawing Mekall's eyes to his own, holding his gaze with the strength of what he now felt was love.

Mekall looked at him in awe as the feeling spread to him as well. Obi-Wan knelt there, the lamp glow turning his skin to gold and burning copper highlights into his almost-red hair. For him to feel this, Mekall thought, to know with such certainty, after all he's been through . . .

Hilty groaned quietly in his sleep. Mekall's eyes shifted to the bed. How could a thing feel so good and so bad at the same time? he wondered.

Obi-Wan turned as he heard Yls come to the door.

"Lure's ready," the healer said.

"Tell him to come up," Mekall acknowledged. Yls left to do so.

Outside the thin light of a Larral morning was beginning to creep over the horizon. Mekall carded his hand through Obi-Wan's hair. This was no time to vacillate. Bad enough he had to break Hilty's heart, the least he could do was break it quickly.

Obi-Wan stood. The compassion in the Jedi's face gave Mekall the resolve he needed. Obi-Wan nodded tightly and left the two alone.

Mekall moved forward in his chair. "Hilty," he nudged his companion to wake him. Hilty opened his eyes somnolently, started to smile at seeing his lover, then remembered. He wanted to turn away. Mekall did not let him.

"Tell me what you know," Mekall ordered.

"Tallo Thaan said you had a Jedi. I denied it, of course. You only had that boy. Surely he wasn't a Jedi. You'd have told me. But why would you keep him around? You wouldn't. There wouldn't be any reason to."

Mekall did not shy from his accusatory look.

"They were saying terrible things, horrible, disgusting things about you. Things I knew weren't true. Couldn't be . . . but . . . you did," Hilty said. "He was brutalized. They betrayed you and cast you into the abyss. How could you?"

"He was . . . you saw, Dharuje nearly killed him. I only cleaned him up and had Yls look at him," Mekall said. "I wanted to get him on his feet, to get rid of him. But he didn't wake up. So I tried to heal him. Somehow, in doing that, unbeknownst to me, a bond formed between us."

"A bond? A _bond_ bond?"

Mekall nodded, looking down at his hands. He brought his right hand to his mouth where he began to chew at the edge of a cuticle.

Hilty's hand emerged from beneath the blankets. He drew Mekall's hand away from his gnawing teeth, as he had so many times in the past.

"Don't," he chided, his affection for Mekall winning out over his heartache. Mekall looked up, face awash with confusion. Hilty was astonished at the openness of his expression.

"You bonded with him," Hilty repeated, disbelief coloring his voice.

"I never meant," Mekall offered, "I never would have . . . hurt you. I don't want to hurt you. I can't . . . " Mekall lowered his lips to kiss Hilty's hand where it covered his. Hilty leaned forward, gently bringing his forehead to rest against Mekall's.

"I love you," Mekall said very softly, his voice strained from emotion.

"I love you," Hilty responded. His thoughts were racing. Mekall was . . . bonded, to a Jedi. They remained head to head, both feeling the finality, neither quite ready for the moment to end. After a time, Lure cleared his throat from the doorway.

"How's it going, Lure?" Hilty asked so casually Lure smiled and a laugh escaped Mekall. He rose and helped Hilty prop himself up.

"Now what?" Hilty inquired.

Mekall found his center before answering, victim of a decidedly unwelcome, and heretofore unknown, maudlin streak that wanted to deter him from what he knew had to be done. He looked into Hilty's eyes and said, "Now Lure's going to take you where you'll be safe and I'm going to take Obi-Wan to Coruscant."

"What?" Hilty stammered, shocked.

"I'm leaving. I have to take him back."

"You're leaving."

"Yeah."

"You're . . ." Hilty's brain would not let him form a whole thought. This could not be. "Coruscant?" he said, trying to find a way to process what he had heard. "You're going to Coruscant?"

"Yeah," Mekall smiled. "Imagine."

"Couldn't've. I . . . I'd like to meet him," Hilty proposed, stalling for time.

"Well - "

"Please."

Mekall cringed inwardly. It was the one thing he had hoped to avoid, but he should have known Hilty would want to face this travail head on. He would not deny him that. Mekall sent Lure to get Obi-Wan.

"You'll be safe at Lure's," Mekall remarked while they waited.

"'Course," Hilty agreed. "Obi-Wan," he thought aloud, "funny name."

Silence hung between them at once easy and awkward.

Lure came through the door with Obi-Wan in front of him. Obi-Wan hesitated, then put aside his reticence and approached the bed. Duty above all else, perhaps, Mekall thought, but poise and composure in all things ran a close second.

"I'm Obi-Wan Kenobi," the tawny-haired man introduced himself.

"I've heard," Hilty snubbed him curtly.

"Hilty," Mekall cautioned.

"I'm sorry. Where are my manners? I'm Hiltin CaddamMar. I saved your life."

"Mekall told me," Obi-Wan replied. "Thank you."

"Oh, don't thank me -" Hilty sneered.

"Hilty," Mekall warned again.

"Right. Sorry, Mekall. Am I being inopportune? I'm not sure how to be when my entire life is torn out from under me like a flimsy rug in the space of a day and a night and a gorgeous Jedi stands in front of me thanking me for handing it to him on a platter."

"Hilty!" from Mekall and "I'm sorry," from Obi-Wan overlapped one another.

"Yes," Hilty addressed Obi-Wan, "I think we can agree that we're all sorry, Jedi. Mekall's sorry, you're sorry, I'm -" his voice broke then.

Mekall took a reflexive step toward Hilty. Obi-Wan thought it the better part of valor to leave.

"Obi-Wan, please," Hilty tried again. "Please don't go. I . . . I am sorry. I'm not - I thought I could handle this." Hilty found something fascinating to stare at on the blanket. "I don't want to leave it like this," he said without looking up, "but I don't . . . I . . . Don't let him get hurt. The Jedi . . . well, you know what they did. No offense," he added quickly, looking up to read Obi-Wan's eyes.

"None taken," Obi-Wan assured him.

"Be careful," Hilty carried on. "You'll have my whole life in your hands," he said, eyes moving to meet Mekall's.

"I will," Obi-Wan vowed.

As the former lovers looked at each other, Obi-Wan left the room. Mekall sat down next to Hilty.

"Are you coming back?" Hilty asked simply.

"I don't expect to," Mekall answered as honestly as he could.

Hilty looked at him imploringly for a few seconds, then opened his mouth to speak, but did not.

"It's time," Mekall said as he got off the bed.

Hilty pulled the blankets aside and stiffly started to get up. He let Mekall help him. Lure took out clean clothes from the things Yls had brought.

When Hilty was dressed, the three of them walked to the entrance. They exchanged simple good-byes. There was too much to be said and no time for saying it. All three donned breathers and Mekall and Hilty walked side by side to where Lure had brought out Yls' speeder.

They could not speak with their outdoor gear on. Mekall was guiltily glad of it. Hilty, tough, tender, endlessly understanding Hilty, looked at him with infinite sadness, his gold eyes latching onto Mekall's as if they would never let go. He touched his fingers to his chest over his heart and brought them to the breather over Mekall's lips. They came together in a brief but intense embrace, then Mekall helped him into the rear seat of the speeder.

Mekall turned, coming face to chest with Lure. He looked up. The Niadan's expression was ambivalent. Take care of him, Mekall thought. Both men nodded, then Lure climbed into the hovercraft.

Mekall returned to the house without a backward glance. Yls met him at the door.

"I guess this is it," the healer said, for want of being able to put all he would have liked to say into a few words.

"Yeah," Mekall replied, equally lacking, all the more so due to his most verbal of friends being speechless.

"No, ah, need to . . . " was all Yls could manage.

"No," Mekall seconded with half a smile.

Yls turned around to pick up his med bag and his breather. When he turned back, he gave in to impulse and grabbed Mekall in a hug. Mekall was too taken aback to return it. Yls released his grip in a matter of seconds, put on his breathing gear and left.

Mekall watched through the window as Yls darted out to the speeder. He got into the front passenger seat, the canopy closed over them and Lure fired up the engines. Hilty looked out the back window toward the house as they flew into the rising sun.

Obi-Wan came forward from where he had been keeping himself out of the way carrying a small case Yls had brought for him. He had packed the clothes Obi-Wan had ended up claiming as his over the past weeks.

"What now?" he asked.

"Now?" Mekall answered. "Now, we go." He turned and walked toward the bedroom. "They'll be safe," Mekall spoke as he walked. "Tallo Thaan is a political animal. Once you and I are off planet, there's nothing for him to gain. But even if he gets stupid, Hilty'll be protected at Lure's."

Obi-Wan felt Mekall was right, even if he was saying it to convince himself as much as anything.

Mekall came back with the large case slung over his shoulder by a strap, the small case under one arm and a refuse bag in his other hand. He put his cases down and went to toss the bag into the reclamator. He walked back up the hall to check the house one more time. Satisfied they had left no evidence of their stopover, he rejoined Obi-Wan.

The long night had begun to catch up with the Jedi and he was leaning against the table. When Mekall approached, Obi-Wan straightened up and visibly stiffened.

"You don't need to do that for me," Mekall informed him.

"No," Obi-Wan said wanly but with conviction, "I need to do it for me."

Mekall picked up a breather and handed it to him. Obi-Wan reached for it, relaxing a bit and touching his hand for longer than strictly necessary, wanting to touch his thoughts as well. Mekall's shields were solidly in place. He repelled Obi-Wan's inquiry with a studied blankness.

Obi-Wan straightened his back once again, accepted the breather and put it on.

Mekall extended his arm toward the door, ushering him out.

(continued in part 7)