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*My* Jedi Apprentice novel #6

Written as an emotional response to the Jedi Apprentice novel #5, "Defenders of the Dead"

PLEASE READ THE NOTES!

CATEGORY: H/C, Angst

RATING: PG

SPOILERS: HUGE spoilers for Scholastic's Jedi Apprentice books, especially #5, "Defenders of the Dead", spoilers in the last section for the Tales of the Jedi series by Dark Horse Comics, notably "The Fall of the Sith Empire" and "Redemption".

NOTE #1: This is written for all those who, like me, screamed in mock or otherwise rage at what happened in "Defenders of the Dead" between Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan. I know well that "An Uncertain Path", Jude Watson's JA #6 book, is coming out in January. I could NOT wait to see how Jude undoes/fixes their relationship. I do not expect to like the actual #6 book, but it doesn't matter - I've written MINE, and I'm hoping you will like how I've restored what was and hopefully made their relationship better.

NOTE #2: While I am primarily a slash writer, I did NOT intend to slash Master Qui-Gon Jinn with the thirteen-year-old Obi-Wan Kenobi in this story!! What I've built between them MAY lead to something "more", but that may be far in the future when Obi-Wan is an adult. I intended only to get them closer to what Jude Watson describes in "Defenders of the Dead" as the "mind-communion" between Master and Padawan and the idea that they must "merge body and soul" with one another. Any slash potential is the only reason why I'm posting this to Master_Apprentice as well as the Jedi Apprentice list.

NOTE #3: If you have not read "Defenders of the Dead", you can still read this - I think you'll pick up enough of the gist as to what went "wrong" between them.

DISCLAIMER: They belong to George, yadda yadda...

WARNING: Mush alert!

ARCHIVE: Jedi Apprentice list archives, Master_Apprentice list archives only

SUMMARY: Thirteen-year-old Jedi Padawan Obi-Wan Kenobi has made some really bad decisions. Jedi Master Qui-Gon Jinn has fallen prey to some old fears. It's all uphill from there!

After delivering Knight Tahl to the Healers, a tall, lone, dark-robed figure strode through the halls of the Jedi Temple toward the tower of the Jedi High Council. Those who saw his passing wondered - where was his Padawan? For this particular Jedi Master to come home alone was viewed by all who knew him as a terrible tragedy. He who had now - apparently - lost not one, but two padawan learners...

Yoda was frankly alarmed to see the mental state his former padawan was in, though Qui-Gon Jinn delivered his mission report - alone - with his usual calm. Still, Yoda knew Qui-Gon too well, and the cool impassivity was transparent to the ancient Jedi Master. Qui-Gon was suffering acutely.

The news of Obi-Wan's betrayal was very unwelcome, and came as a shock to the entire Council, though no one complained when Yoda cut the report short and ordered Master Jinn to come aside with him privately. Qui-Gon looked relieved, though his misery was not lessened one whit by this reprieve. "My master," he murmured when alone at last with his old teacher.

Yoda peered up at the tall Jedi, then tapped at the floor with his gimer stick. "Sit with me, Qui-Gon Jinn," he asked quietly. When the big man had folded himself cross-legged on the floor, the tiny master touched his former student's cheek gently with his pudgy claw. "Hurt you deeply, this has..."

"I should have made a more active effort to bond with him on a personal level," Qui-Gon murmured, pain in every line on his face, and in the stoop of his shoulders. "He didn't feel enough of a bond with us to keep to his commitment, Master Yoda. When a cause came along to reach into his heart more deeply, he abandoned all his training, our life, *us*... me. This is my fault, clearly."

"Not true, Qui-Gon," Yoda tried to reassure him, but there was no reassuring to be achieved this day.

"I should have welcomed him into his new relationship with me as my padawan without reserve," Qui-Gon continued, his voice low and riddled with pain. "Instead I made him pay for my fears because of Xanatos. I held back my heart when he needed it the most. We still had far to go to develop the mind-communion we need." He paused, his throat tight with emotion. [How could I have lost yet another student, Master?] he continued to the other's mind. [I will never teach again...]

Yoda patted Qui-Gon's shoulder, though he was deeply worried. He'd been the one to see, many years ago, how the bright and energetic Obi-Wan Kenobi, so strong with the Force, would be a perfect match for Qui-Gon Jinn as padawan... and more. Each to heal the other, one bright with potential, the other with the power to form that potential well... both to become a team of beauty and harmony, perhaps the finest of the Order. Obviously there were a few rough edges in each to be smoothed before the melding could take place. Now Qui-Gon wanted to abandon teaching altogether... and there might never be a true healing for this in him. [Lost him you have not, Qui-Gon,] Yoda replied in same, his mental voice firm though compassionate. [Go back to Melida/Daan, you will. Open your heart to him finally, hmmm?]

Qui-Gon flinched at the idea. How could he face Obi-Wan again? How could he bear to look upon that closed expression, the determination in the boy's eyes to join with the children of that planet in their struggle to stop the warring? Qui-Gon himself had done everything he could to convince all parties to stop the fighting, but it hadn't made any difference... to the Melida, the Daan, the Young... or to Obi-Wan. Go back there?

"Master..." Qui-Gon tried to speak, but couldn't. [Master, please...]

Yoda closed his eyes for a moment, pausing to read the Force. For so long it had spoken to him clearly about these two... now he noted it was not so clear... but, yes, it was still there. Obi-Wan and Qui-Gon were destined to be together. [Trust in the Force, my Padawan,] Yoda replied gently. [Obi-Wan *is* your Padawan Learner. Open your heart to him, you must.]

[Yes... my Master,] Qui-Gon replied brokenly, though he could not fathom how he could possibly do that to any effect.

Within the hour, he was on a transport back to Melida/Daan.

Qui-Gon landed the starfighter exactly where he and Obi-Wan had first hidden it a scant two weeks ago. The thing that spoke the loudest to him was that all was quiet. There were no sounds and all was still. He had been neither challenged nor hailed. This suited him fine. After checking his supplies, the Jedi Master paused to do that which he'd been dreading - attempt to sense his Padawan through the Force. What he did sense startled him.

Pain, anguish, fear... all rolling through the Force from a single individual. Qui-Gon hastily shouldered his field pack and left the starfighter. Casting a quick glance around, he saw no one, but what he'd sensed still radiated strongly less than twenty meters away. He set out into the war-ruined landscape. What he sought was huddled under a rocky escarpment.

It was Obi-Wan, his left leg stretched out to one side, though at an odd angle - broken. His clothes were ragged and torn, his bare arms and face filthy and scratched up. A few of the scratches appeared red and swollen, probably infected. Immediately Qui-Gon knelt beside him, pulling the pack around in front of him to retrieve his medical kit.

The boy pulled away violently at first, fearing an enemy, but when he saw who was with him, fear of another kind flashed through him. But the usually stern and impassive face of his former master was changed dramatically. What he saw there was... pain and dread. Was the Master injured, too? Obi-Wan, confused and in pain, did not understand at first. "You..." he breathed, frowning, wondering how the Jedi Master could even be here.

Qui-Gon did not yet meet his eyes, but deftly worked to attend to the boy's injuries. "Yes, me, Obi-Wan," he murmured, the boy's chin held firmly in his hand as he cleaned his face with an antiseptic wipe. Obi-Wan as yet held still, though the anxiety still rolled off him, making the elder feel sick. There were terrible things going on here, he was sure. "Where are the Young? What has been happening here? Can you tell me, Padawan?"

The title came automatically. Both flinched. What had been between them was deeply damaged, and not easily recoverable. A wave of agony lanced through Obi-Wan's mind at the reminder of what he'd lost. "Dead, all dead or taken to detention camps," the boy gasped, blinking back tears. "Cerasi, Nield dead, most of the others... the Melida left me to die, telling me I wasn't to go to the camps because... because I'm neither Melida nor Daan... I don't belong." The bitterness sheeted off him in waves, making them both feel ill. "These aren't my people and I've betrayed what people I could once have claimed. I belong nowhere and do not deserve to pledge myself to anyone. Least of all... you." The last word was choked out.

Anger at himself again threatened to overwhelm Qui-Gon but he knew that if there was any way to repair what had been done, he must initiate it. Though his heart had broken, he must forgive and take his padawan back, work with him on starting over. "I will argue with you about that later, Obi-Wan," Qui-Gon murmured, rapidly checking the boy over for other injuries. Except for scratches and the bone that badly needed setting, Obi-Wan was physically fine, though he likely hadn't eaten for a long time and looked exhausted. "Right now, we're leaving the planet. Will you come with me now?" He kept his voice neutral and quiet.

The boy's expression settled into quiet resignation. "I have to answer to the Council, I know. Yes, I will come. There is nothing here for me, no cause left for which to fight, for the elders have killed their own children by the thousands and there is no hope left. I have seen..." He flinched at a particularly painful memory. "I have seen suicide on all sides, Melida and Daan, old and young. The last hope here has died. There is no one left, I believe, with whom to negotiate, and whoever may remain is still locked onto destroying the other side. That much has not changed."

Qui-Gon felt the sick hollowness that had infected the once-exuberant padawan, and his heart clenched in momentary fear that too much damage had been done, not just to their relationship, but to Obi-Wan himself, having had to face so much death and loss alone. "Come, let's go home," he murmured, carefully collecting the boy into his arms, mindful of the broken leg.

Obi-Wan's mind was tightly shielded against him still, he noted with a sigh as he carried the boy to the starfighter. In moments, the little transport had lifted off, leaving the Melida/Daan system for Coruscant.

After seeing the ship safely into hyperspace, Qui-Gon returned to the solitary bunkroom where he'd laid Obi-Wan. The boy, he noted with continued dismay, was staring stonily into space, though his face was still pinched with pain. At least Obi-Wan had consumed the packet of food Qui-Gon had left earlier, he noticed, seeing the empty container. Qui-Gon pulled over a chair and sat next to the bed. "Obi-Wan," he said gently, touching the boy's arm through the coverlet he'd drawn over him, "I need to tell you some things, if I may. Please."

Obi-Wan closed his eyes briefly. He deserved to be chastised, so why not get it over with? He'd been a foolish child, chasing off after the first noble cause that attracted him on a personal level. He'd been with the Jedi nearly his whole life, and they'd cared for him, taught him, raised him in the ancient, noble Jedi Order. Guardians for peace and justice in the whole Republic. He'd thrown away that for... what? The chance to make a difference on one single planet... maybe. A slim chance to help a group of children in a one-time desperate hope for peace. Weighing that single gift... no matter how great the need had seemed at the time... against a lifetime of helping countless planetary governments achieve greater harmony within themselves and with others... had caused Obi-Wan to have a rude awakening. No one could be of greater help in the Republic on a large scale like a Jedi Knight. He'd have been throwing away the greater good that he'd have been able to achieve with his gifts, his life. Besides, in the end he wasn't wanted anyway because he was not of the planet as it was. If there ever was hope for the Melida and Daan, it could only come from within.

Glancing reluctantly at his former master, Obi-Wan steeled himself for the tirade to come. It would be nothing compared to the brutal taste of reality he'd already had to taste. "Yes, of course," he answered the Jedi Master. "And I have more to say myself... beginning with an apology, if I will be allowed to make one."

Qui-Gon drew out the boy's hand and fitted his fingers into the other's. "I have been dreadfully remiss in my duties to my padawan, Obi-Wan. And the first apology must be mine."

A frown crossed the boy's face as he glanced at their clasped hands in confusion. "It was my decision," Obi-Wan murmured, wincing at the ache in his heart. [Don't treat me nicely, I do not deserve it,] he thought to himself.

The elder squeezed his hand, commanding his attention. "Listen to me, Padawan..."

"Do not call me that, I don't deserve it," Obi-Wan muttered, pulling his hand loose. He turned his head away. "I threw that away..."

Qui-Gon applied a flick of the Force, drawing the boy's attention back to him. "You must let me finish, Obi-Wan," he said a little more firmly. [Headstrong and stubborn, my Obi-Wan,] he thought, his heart sinking. [And way too much like his master.] "I am the elder here, I will apologize first. This all started before Phindar and Gala, and you know it. The root of what has happened here is in my initial refusal to take you on as Padawan..."

"Master..."

"You will let me finish," Qui-Gon added, his eyes begging, his hand touching the boy's shoulder again. "I let my irrational fears wound a fine young man who does not possess the false heart of a betrayer like Xanatos. It caused me to hold back with you, Obi-Wan, keep from you what I as your master needed to share with you. Though our training bond began even before I'd accepted you, I did not follow through once I had in order to ensure that our mental communion would develop as it should. If I had not held back my heart from you, Obi-Wan... you would not have been so quick to throw away our relationship. It might have been enough to trust me, trust my counsel. Without the proper Master-Padawan relationship, we might as well be only traveling companions. And I know I failed you, for that is what I treated you like."

When Obi-Wan wanted to interrupt, Qui-Gon held up his hand. He was not finished. "Yoda told me that the Force was drawing us together, but I did not want to believe it. This was my folly, Obi-Wan, for I now believe - at last and I hope not too late - that the Force indeed has thrown us together and that we must follow its will for us. To be Master and Padawan for real."

"I betrayed you!" Obi-Wan gasped, his eyes filling with tears. [He cannot mean to take me back!]

"And I betrayed you by refusing you what was rightfully yours," Qui-Gon insisted, reaching a hand to touch fingertips to the boy's cheek. "As my Padawan Learner, you have the first right to my heart and my love. As your Master, I have the first right to yours. If they did not teach you this in the Temple... they should have. And I should have spoken to you of this and many other things, Obi-Wan." Bitterness darkened his expression. "I am the one who has not been deserving of his title."

Qui-Gon's words made Obi-Wan shiver. [I... I have first right to his... his heart?] he thought, shocked. "I... I don't know what to say," he said finally, gulping. "Except that Xanatos told me that... that... you'd held back your heart from him, too. I thought..." He paused, not knowing what words to use to express what he was feeling.

"You thought I was doing the same with you," Qui-Gon finished for him bitterly. "I suppose I was. Now I learn of my folly, but not before I've nearly lost you, Obi-Wan."

Obi-Wan *was* shivering, powerful emotions pulling at him from all sides. "The Council will send me away when they learn what I've done..." Then a stab of pain again as he realized something. "But they already know, don't they? They've sent you to retrieve me so that I may be punished..."

"No..." Qui-Gon bit out abruptly. "There will be no punishment."

"Then to send me away... home, what there is of it," Obi-Wan considered, calming. "I left the Order when I did not come with you."

"No!" the Jedi Master repeated, both hands moving to clasp the boy by the shoulders as he neared. "Obi-Wan, I want to start all over with you. I want to begin again, to heal what we've done to one another and then to work on developing the kind of relationship that we should have built together in the first place. If only you can trust this broken shell of a Jedi Master to do it right this time..."

Belatedly, Obi-Wan realized his face was wet with tears. He swiped at them, then laid his hands along Qui-Gon's forearms, holding him there. "Oh, Master, how can you trust *me*?"

"We both have a long way to go, but we'll get help, Obi-Wan," Qui-Gon insisted, pulling the boy into his arms, his own eyes moist. "We will be stronger for this, and never again will either of us take the other for granted. Master Yoda will help us, and others. We will soon be Master and Padawan as we should be. I long for that, Obi-Wan."

Something in Obi-Wan's heart had eased, and he could not speak, so relieved and overcome was he. So he merely held tightly onto his Master's back - *his* *Master* - and buried his face in his shoulder.

Moments later, the pain still swirling around the boy's mind could no longer be ignored. "Let me help with that, Padawan," Qui-Gon murmured, kissing his forehead. "And there is your leg to be set."

Obi-Wan shivered, his mind still trying to process the change in his master, welcome as it was. [He really *does* want me as his Padawan,] he thought in wonder, then grimaced as another wave of pain hit him. "Yes... Master." The title was emitted half in a sob. [Oh, to call him that again - I never thought I would even see him, do not deserve to... and now...]

The tall body rocked gently for a moment, holding him tighter. "Shhh, Padawan, let me..."

Unable to hold back a whimper, Obi-Wan released a ragged breath and loosened enough of his tight shielding to allow the Jedi Master to attend to his pain, which admittedly he had been having increasing trouble doing on his own. Never before had he had to manage pain of this magnitude for this long. He'd broken his leg two days ago.

Delicately, the Master insinuated his controls into the boy's mind, dampening the throbbing pain effectively. [Now, your leg,] he whispered into Obi-Wan's mind gently with careful warmth. [Shhh...]

Obi-Wan tensed as his Master spoke to his mind for the first time ever, then relaxed as he felt the ebbing of pain. "Thank you, Master," he gulped, releasing him reluctantly as he was bidden to lay back. "You... you can heal my leg, Master?"

Qui-Gon smiled, patting the boy's chest. "No, Padawan, but I can set the bone. Then perhaps together we can use a healing trance to get you on the way to healing." His expression sobering, he glanced at some of the redder scratches. "That will help fight infection, too, though we may need the healers to work on that for us, and your leg, of course."

"Why are you being so good to me?" Obi-Wan sighed.

[Shhhh... none of that, Padawan,] Qui-Gon gently admonished him. [Can you feel our bond, Obi-Wan?]

The boy stilled, going inward. There wasn't much of a bond to feel, not yet. Still, the young Force-sensitive could feel the fragile tendrils of their connection... and the ragged ends of those tendrils he'd managed to sever when he'd rejected the Jedi in favor of the Young of the Melida/Daan. Seeing what he'd done, he whimpered again, wanting to turn away from it.

[It's all right, Padawan,] Qui-Gon whispered gently, taking up the boy's hand again. [We will put those back together as they should be. Would you like that?]

"Yes, Master," Obi-Wan sighed, squeezing the hand in his gratefully. Then he blurted out, "You never spoke in my mind before, Master Qui-Gon, not like this. Is this... is this how it's supposed to be? Will I be able to speak to your mind?"

Qui-Gon smiled, returning the squeeze lightly, then sobered again. "No... this isn't usual, Padawan... but it will be for us. I'm afraid this is something else Master Yoda had told me... and that I'd denied."

Obi-Wan gasped, understanding abruptly. "You're a telepath... not just Force-sensitive," he said, awed. "Then I am also? I will be able to speak like that?"

The Jedi Master froze for a moment, then nodded. [I have to share even this with him,] he told himself sternly. [That is why I failed - I did not include him enough. He has a right to know his potential...] Aloud he murmured, "Obi-Wan, about one-fourth of all Jedi have some telepathic potential as well as our Force-sensitivity. For those who do not, the Master-Padawan bond never goes past the ability to sense the other and alert the other of danger through the Force. We had already developed that for the most part. Much of the rest is out of their control - the communication with words... and the rest." Qui-Gon's glance slid away; "the rest" was not something to discuss with a thirteen-year-old. "You and I... yes, we're in that twenty-five percent who have true telepathic capabilities. What do they tell you in the Temple about the bond?"

The boy swallowed hard, the information daunting... as were the implications. "We are told of the 'mind-communion' between Master and Padawan, the melding of one mind and body to the other... I never really understood what that meant. No one would go into more detail, not even Master Yoda."

Qui-Gon nodded. "They spoke of the subconscious part of the bond. Someday you and I will move as one, think as one mind, though of course we each have our opinions. But we will feel a harmony through the Force that is remarkable. You've seen the annual demonstrations..." He referred to the gatherings at the Temple each year where Padawans, Knights, and Masters demonstrated their physical skills and lightsaber forms. They were not competitions, though to be invited to demonstrate was a prized privilege, awarded by the Council. Qui-Gon, when his schedule permitted, was usually asked to participate.

"Yes..." The boy's eyes were wide. "I remember seeing you once, with..."

The Master's eyes closed. "Then you saw. I thought I had that perfect blending with Xanatos once. He was a master at shielding, for I never suspected he was not as he appeared... or as he felt."

Obi-Wan patted his master's hand. "One day that will be us... and it will be true, Master Qui-Gon," he said softly. "I promise."

The dark blue eyes flew open. "As do I, Padawan," Qui-Gon whispered, sighing. "We will talk of this more when you are well, Obi-Wan. Now, your leg... I must first determine where the break is. If I may..." When Obi-Wan nodded, Qui-Gon drew the coverlet off the boy, who was clad only in the thin leggings Qui-Gon had found him in. Taking a knife from his pouch on his belt, the Jedi Master cut the cloth away from the boy's left leg, revealing the odd bulge below the knee. "Good, it's not a compound fracture," he murmured, noting that there was no break in the skin.

"Can you set it?" the boy asked worriedly, frowning at the twisted angle of his leg.

"Of course I can," Qui-Gon replied quietly. Then he laid a hand on Obi-Wan's ankle and closed his eyes.

For long minutes, it appeared that nothing was happening, then Obi-Wan began to feel a growing surge of power within the Force, concentrated in the Jedi Master. His Force-sense seemed to "see" a bright aura swirling with greens and golds around Qui-Gon, like living tendrils of the Living Force. It was a display of Force-power that the young Jedi had never seen before. Then he felt a heat enter his leg, the touch of Force. He gaped as his bones moved within his leg, the two broken bones of his lower leg slowly aligning and fitting together into place. The heat entered his muscles as well, ligaments reattached where they had been torn loose. There was no pain.

Finally the aura faded and the Jedi Master slumped forward a little, then hastily straightened as Obi-Wan gasped in surprise. "Master?"

Qui-Gon took a couple of deep, gulping breaths, his head swimming. "I'll be fine, Padawan. One more thing, then I think we both need to sleep." He rose from where he was sitting on the edge of the bed, immediately putting out a hand to steady himself. He waved off the boy's worry, then went to get a small force-generator that would provide support for Obi-Wan's healing leg. He laid the device on the bed, adjusted the fields to incorporate the wounded limb closely, and then activated it. There would be no moving of the leg until they reached Coruscant in about six hours. Or...

"Do you have a need to relieve yourself, Padawan?" Qui-Gon asked, fiddling with the controls on the force-field generator. "You're going to need help."

"Ah..." Obi-Wan hedged, unwilling to ask for help when the Jedi Master was so obviously drained, but then Qui-Gon looked up and fixed him with a glare. "Yes, thank you, Master."

"Don't worry, I'm not of the opinion that you need me to hold it for you," Qui-Gon said with an ironic snort as he set the disk-like generator in the boy's hands, then slid his arms underneath his padawan's shoulders and knees to lift him off the bed. Because of the force-field encasing the left leg, it stuck out awkwardly, providing only a solid surface with a bit of a buzz where Qui-Gon came into contact with it. "I think you can stand on one foot, yes?"

"Yes, Master," Obi-Wan murmured, hiding his embarrassment against the dark robe.

After the short trip to the refresher, Qui-Gon laid Obi-Wan back on the bed again, then touched his cheek gently. "Good rest, Padawan."

The overwhelming emotions were already threatening to surge back. Obi-Wan blinked back tears and nodded tightly. "Good rest, Master."

At the small Jedi spaceport at the Temple on Coruscant, Master and Padawan were met by Yoda and a healer. "I want to stay with you," Obi-Wan murmured to Qui-Gon hastily as he was placed in a hovering medical carrier that had accompanied the healer.

"See Master Jinn soon, you will," Yoda murmured, giving the boy a noncommittal look. "Heal first, then report to the Council you shall." He gestured to the tall Master. "Come with me, Master Qui-Gon."

[I'll see you soon, Padawan,] Qui-Gon hastily sent to him, giving him a last long look before turning on his heel to accompany Master Yoda.

Grinding his teeth on the ignominy of being carried through the Temple, Obi-Wan hoped none of his friends were here right now... or any who knew of his betrayal, for that matter. He felt like it was written in his blood across his forehead: "abandoned the Order..." But the halls were blessedly empty this mid-afternoon. [I wonder what Master Yoda is asking Qui-Gon, what they are talking about?] His sense of their bond, as before, was still woefully weak, sending another rush of unwanted remorse through him.

Just as they entered the Hall of Healing, Obi-Wan felt a tingle from the bond - Qui-Gon, sending him reassurance. Though it was but a whisper, relief flooded through him.

Yoda had steered his former padawan directly to the Council chamber, much to Qui-Gon's chagrin. He'd hoped he and Obi-Wan could face the Jedi High Council together. Hopefully they still could. While Yoda stalked to his little round chair, Qui-Gon bowed to the assembled Council, their eyes all on him.

"Masters," he began gravely. "I have returned from Melida/Daan with Obi-Wan Kenobi." He felt relief in some, wariness in others. "He is with the healers right now, as he has sustained a broken leg and some deep scratches which have become infected."

"What of the planet?" Master Windu asked coolly.

Qui-Gon bit back a retort. Surely the return of one of their own meant more than a troubled planet. "Melida/Daan is in chaos, the children's army dispersed, killed, or captured. The two warring sides of Elders are in no better shape, and there are no longer any efforts to negotiate for peace."

Master Piell spoke up. "Was Obi-Wan still with others of the Young, as you say they call themselves? Did he come with you willingly?"

"No, he was alone. I saw no others. Obi-Wan said those who were not killed were mostly put into detention camps... but he was rejected because he was not of that world. Or perhaps - though they would not say this to him, of course - they feared to hold him in case the Jedi would retaliate. He was apparently trying to make it back to the place where we'd originally hidden our transport, in the hopes of being rescued, though he did not seem to hold that hope still when I found him." Qui-Gon cleared his throat to finish. "He came with me willingly and is willing to start afresh with me as my Padawan. As I am prepared to begin anew as well."

Master Gallia spoke up, frowning. "Your padawan disobeyed you repeatedly, has questioned your decisions time and time again, and betrayed you... and you want to start over with him? I doubt it will be that simple, Master Jinn. You have an angry, willful boy there... what if the children's army had succeeded? Would he still have wanted to return? I do not believe you're facing the deeper issues here."

Stung, Qui-Gon took a deep breath. "I hold myself to blame for Obi-Wan's attitude. I failed to bond with him on a personal level..."

"You've only been together a couple months," Ki-Adi-Mundi countered firmly. "The fault is in the boy. Of course he wants to come back now. Would he have if the Melida or Daan had not rejected him?"

Qui-Gon closed his eyes briefly, considering. Obi-Wan had been swept up in the moment, he was sure of it. And he was just thirteen, a difficult age. "I believe so, yes," he replied, looking back at her solemnly. "His heart was in the right place. Indeed, if the need to return to Coruscant with Knight Tahl had not been so critical, I would not have left the planet myself."

[That wasn't something the Council wanted to hear,] he noted, scanning the scowls around the room soberly. [And they're not saying so yet, but I'm in every bit as much trouble as Obi-Wan.]

Master Mace Windu spoke up. "Master Qui-Gon, your mission and Obi-Wan's was to bring Tahl home. Obi-Wan deliberately went against the mission objectives. How can you excuse your padawan so casually? If I remember, you did not want to accept him as padawan originally because of his anger and willfulness."

Qui-Gon turned to face Windu, his expression chilly. "If I once mistook ardor for anger, I have since learned better of him, Master Windu. Obi-Wan Kenobi is powerfully strong in the Force, though he needs the perspective only time and experience will give. He's very young to have faced a decision of the magnitude of what was asked of him on Melida/Daan. His commitment to the Light and to the Jedi mandate to be guardians of peace and justice is complete. He more than deserves the chance to make up for his unfortunate decision."

"Opened your heart to him finally, you have?" Yoda spoke up suddenly, peering narrowly at the tall human.

"Yes, my Master," Qui-Gon replied quietly. "I believe we have already started to connect personally. I should have seen how he needed that."

"Obi-Wan's offenses warrant dismissal," Ki-Adi-Mundi spoke up again. "Yours, if indeed you resisted the formation of the Master-Padawan bond as it seems like you have, warrants censure. At the least, even if you do continue to train Kenobi, we will need to evaluate the two of you closely, perhaps even monthly. Are you willing to be so evaluated?"

That stung also, but Qui-Gon knew he deserved it. Never mind that he'd successfully trained one Padawan to Knighthood and very nearly another. No Jedi Master ever received this kind of scrutiny. "I am willing to be evaluated by Master Yoda, yes."

That drew a couple smoldering looks. Qui-Gon's continual insolence to the Council was a thorn in their side. If he weren't so effective in the field...

"Acceptable, this is," Yoda said quickly before anyone else could respond. He'd allowed the others to vent, but the bottom line was that Qui-Gon Jinn must train Obi-Wan Kenobi. "Discuss this with you later, we shall, Master Qui-Gon. Obi-Wan needs you now... when better he is, bring him before the Council you shall."

"Thank you, my Master," Qui-Gon breathed out, relief flooding into him.

When Qui-Gon had departed for the Hall of Healing, the Council chamber erupted into noisy discussion. Most of the twelve Council members were furious with Yoda for dismissing Jinn so casually. "The man has no respect for us!" Adi Gallia declared loudly.

"Respect, always earned, it is," Yoda murmured, tapping his stick on the floor.

"This isn't about the Council," Windu countered with a frown. "Master Yoda, the man constantly defies us... and now is saddled with a padawan who could turn out to be worse in that same area! We cannot allow such defiance to breed more defiance! The Jedi Order must maintain *some* discipline in the ranks!"

"And listen to new ideas, fresh perspectives we must, hmmm?" Yoda challenged back. "Who guides the Jedi Order? The Jedi High Council... or the Force? Strong in the Living Force, Qui-Gon Jinn is. Deeply in communion with it, he is. Perhaps what we perceive as defiance... something else is."

"Unorthodox, Jinn is," Master Yaddle offered thoughtfully. "Unconventional, brilliant, innovative... the great geniuses of the galaxy throughout history, these things have been. Guide an entity such as this, we must, not force him to conform. If Kenobi has the potential to be these things also... allow him to be shaped by his own kind, we must."

Windu sighed deeply. "What is their telepathic potential? Midichlorian counts?"

They glanced at Master Yarael Poof, whose specific task it was to evaluate the mental prowess of all Jedi. The long-necked master responded, "Master Jinn, because of his connection to the Living Force, would have been an exceptional healer had he not chosen to become a diplomat. His empathy rating is 19 out of 20, his telepathy rating 15. The only other Jedi with such an empathy rating are Master Healer T'nennu and Master Healer Vitukki."

Some of the Council hadn't heard the specifics before, and there was more than one gasp. Master Poof, known to be the most powerful telepath of the Council, was rated at 17. No one else among them was higher than Qui-Gon Jinn.

Poof continued. "Kenobi, I believe, has a potential rated somewhere around 14-15 also. Jinn's midichlorian count is 12,310. Kenobi's is 12,250."

More gasps. Of the Council members, only Yoda had a count over 10,000. Yoda's was, it was believed, somewhere over 16,000.

"Rare and special Jedi, these two are," Yoda said gravely. "Handle them with care, we must."

Ki-Adi-Mundi was staring at the diminutive master with open consternation. "You've known all this all along, haven't you, Yoda?"

Yoda closed his eyes, sensing the Force's currents. "Yes. Together, they must be. Jedi Knight, Obi-Wan Kenobi must become."

Eeth Koth leaned forward, gazing at the tiny master. "You see something, don't you, Master Yoda? Something about these two."

"Difficult times coming," Yoda replied cryptically. "The Council matters not. Destiny lies heavy upon their shoulders. Close they must become or lost we all shall be." He opened his eyes and peered around the room. "Learned a hard lesson, Obi-Wan has. Faced his fears, Qui-Gon Jinn has. Forge their bond, they must. Nothing else can interfere with this. Critical, it will be."

There was absolutely nothing anyone could say on the matter after that. The Force was in Master Yoda's voice.

Qui-Gon walked with his usual distance-gulping strides, his mind still whirling from the Council confrontation. [They'll let me train him,] he told himself for the fifth time. [They must. Yoda sees something about us, I'm sure of it. Oh, why didn't I believe before? What if it's too late?] But the Jedi Master would not allow himself to think about that. He and Obi-Wan *would* bond together.

When he reached the Hall of Healing, he was intercepted by Master Healer Buvvo, a Rodian. "Master Jinn," the green-skinned man greeted him with a bow, his large saucer-like red eyes glowing faintly. "Your padawan is in the bacta tank right now. He'll be there for just a couple more hours. Thanks to you, he is healing very well. I'm impressed with your setting of his bones."

"Thank you, Master Buvvo," Qui-Gon replied, returning the bow. "May I see him?"

"Certainly, though he is unconscious."

The Rodian healer led him to the surgical ward where the bacta tanks were located. A pang went through Qui-Gon as he saw his padawan floating in the tank, unconscious and breathing through the life support tubing. [Padawan,] he sent into the boy's mind, reaching deep through the layers of his mind to touch the submerged awareness.

From somewhere deep within emerged a pain-filled moan. Master?

[I am here, Padawan,] Qui-Gon sent, extending a tendril of Force to aid the boy's healing. [I will not leave you.]

Obi-Wan was not otherwise able to speak to his master. A tiny whimper of emotion was all he was able to return.

Qui-Gon leaned against the tank, his large hands splayed over its surface, his eyes closed. His thoughts continued though he did not send any more. [I cannot lose this one, I cannot lose another Padawan. Oh, Force, there is something about this one that draws me... and I must not lose my head like I did over Xanatos. But Obi-Wan is different, I feel it... everything in the Force tells me to plunge headlong into this relationship, give my heart to him. Why wouldn't I see it before?]

A half hour later, Qui-Gon was abruptly shaken out of his trance by the startled exclamation of Buvvo at his elbow. "Mercy of the Force, Qui-Gon, what did you do?"

Straightening, Qui-Gon frowned but immediately looked toward the floating boy in the tank. "Obi-Wan..." he breathed, wondering.

Buvvo was summoning the med-droids. "No use keeping him in here any longer," he muttered, gesturing for the droids to deactivate the bacta tank and get Obi-Wan out. "If you ever get tired of talking peace, Qui-Gon, I've got a job for you..."

Qui-Gon gaped at the tank as he, too, sensed what Buvvo had. Obi-Wan was completely healed, his skin flawless, his bones knit. "I didn't expect..."

"Well, it's done," Buvvo said, steering the tall human out of the droids' way. "Obi-Wan will need a lot of rest, and you might keep him mostly off that leg for another day or so. Then he'll just be weak, but I don't need to be telling you about coming back from injuries. And he'll need a month yet to get his strength back..." He looked up at Qui-Gon, then chuckled. "Okay, let's call it two weeks. Do let us know how he's doing?"

Within ten minutes, Obi-Wan was clean of the bacta solution, dressed in a plain white tunic. He was sitting up, but very groggy, supported by his master. "Where...?" he mumbled.

"We're leaving the Hall of Healing in a few minutes, Padawan," Qui-Gon murmured, bending over to his ear, an arm around his shoulders. "I've sent for clothes for you and for a droid to move your things to my quarters. We haven't been on Coruscant long enough for that, have we?"

"T...thank you," Obi-Wan managed to say, then frowned. "But I have to face the Council... what if they send me away?" Again the remorse surged back.

Through the rudimentary bond they shared, Qui-Gon felt the return of the boy's mental anguish. "They will not send you away," he retorted, his voice a little sharp. "We are to be evaluated frequently."

"'S my fault..."

"Enough," the Jedi Master admonished the boy quietly. "You are still in no condition to judge, my Padawan. And this decision is not yours or mine to make. What's done is done. All we can do is move forward."

Obi-Wan felt miserable. "Yes, Master," he replied dully.

When the clothes arrived, a spare set of tunics from his old room in the students' sector and a new robe, Obi-Wan stood stiffly and got dressed, numbly accepting his master's help. He felt strange putting his Jedi uniform on. [I wasn't supposed to ever wear this again,] he thought with a pang. [This isn't right...] He opened his mouth to complain but got a glimpse of the Jedi Master's face. He closed his mouth again at the sight of Qui-Gon's tension and new exhaustion. [Shut up, Obi, you're already in hot water. No need to make your master - if I still get to call him that - any more furious with you that he is already, despite what he said...]

"Can you walk?" Qui-Gon asked him, a hand to his elbow.

[Calm, Obi... use your mind for once...] "I feel very weak, Master," Obi-Wan replied honestly... and reluctantly. But he knew honesty was the only thing that was going to help them recover their bond. "I don't think I can make it alone... but I would rather not use the carrier..."

When Qui-Gon smiled kindly at him, he sagged with relief. "All right, Padawan," Qui-Gon replied, helping him stand. "I will assist you... though it might be better if I carried you."

"Master..." Obi-Wan murmured quietly, wanting to complain. He was thirteen! He didn't need to be carried like a little boy...

"Your leg was broken," Qui-Gon reminded him, not needing telepathy in this case to follow his padawan's thought. "There is no shame in taking care of your body, Obi-Wan. The bones are but newly knit." He paused, noting that the boy had lost weight through his ordeal this past week. "Let's do this... I'll help you to walk as far as you can, then carry you the rest of the way."

"Thank you, Master," Obi-Wan sighed. As Qui-Gon supported his left side, Obi-Wan slung his arm around the tall man's waist and took a first, careful step. There was little pain; Qui-Gon had taken up the boy's management of that again. Encouraged, Obi-Wan walked on, his master close at his side.

He made it about a third of the way to the tower where the Master-Padawan pairs had their quarters. Obi-Wan, despite Qui-Gon's attention, collapsed suddenly, his legs feeling abruptly like gelatin. Immediately the Master collected him up in his long arms, holding him close against his chest at first, for the boy was trembling. [Shh, Padawan, you did very well,] Qui-Gon was quick to reassure him when the youth clung to his neck. [We'll be there soon, then you can rest.]

Qui-Gon reached the lift for their tower, but when inside, after his floor was keyed into the controls, the master sagged also, leaning heavily against the inside wall of the lift. His mind swam with dizziness, even after he closed his eyes momentarily. He took a deep breath, then another, reaching out as best he could with the Force to clear his mind. Fortunately, his quarters - *their* quarters, now - were only a few steps from the door of the lift. Obi-Wan was already asleep in his arms... and heavier than he'd first seemed.

Once inside, Qui-Gon set Obi-Wan down carefully on the bed in the padawan's room. He arranged the boy's robe more neatly around him, then drew a cover over him, intending to leave him to sleep. But as he straightened to leave, a hand closed around his wrist.

"Master," a sleepy Obi-Wan murmured. "Thank you. I know... I know you're hurting, too."

Qui-Gon looked into the face of the youth who'd so stubbornly refused to leave Melida/Daan with him just a week ago. "In time of need, either the Master or the Padawan must make sacrifices for the other." He spoke gently as he settled onto the edge of the bed beside him. He took the hand in his, then smiled. "I think we have much to learn about the Master-Padawan relationship, Obi-Wan. I look forward to exploring it with you."

Obi-Wan looked into the calm blue eyes, his own bright with hope. "So do I, Master, if the Council will allow it."

He was amazed when a glint of steel came into those deep eyes. "They will not separate us, Obi-Wan. The Force wills it, I am sure now. Yoda was right. We were destined to come together."

The boy squeezed the large hand in his. "Master, I will never betray you like that again, I promise. I think... I think I need to make my vows to you again. If I'm allowed."

Qui-Gon's eyes widened, but he smiled. A Master and a Padawan made vows to each other similar to their Jedi vows of service. Their vows involved obedience and a dedication to training on the part of the Padawan, and protection and commitment to his student's training on the part of the Master. Because he and Obi-Wan had been unusually busy in their first month together, they'd made no ceremony of it, and frankly they'd been rushed. Qui-Gon had intended to take time to re-do the ritual with his padawan as soon as their schedule had allowed.

"Padawan," Qui-Gon replied, returning the squeeze, "I will never betray our vows by holding back that which you need from me as my Padawan. And I think it is a very good idea to hold the ritual again... and restate our vows."

Obi-Wan smiled then, for the first time in a week.

In the morning, they were summoned to the Council chamber. As before, Obi-Wan walked a short way, then, swallowing his pride, he allowed Master Qui-Gon to carry him the rest of the way. But he insisted on walking into the Council chamber on his own power, a stride and to the right behind his Master.

There was a stir in the Council and murmurs. No one expected the boy to be able to stand on his own feet - or was the field generator that well hidden?

"Obi-Wan Kenobi," Mace Windu addressed him, his voice a little sharp. "We were led to believe that you had broken your leg. Was this information in error? Was Master Qui-Gon misled in this?"

[Padawan,] Qui-Gon told his apprentice hastily, [they're going to be hard on you. Remember that I accept and forgive you... and that you *will* be my Padawan Learner. No matter what they say to you or to me.]

Obi-Wan took a deep breath. "No, Master Windu, the information was not in error and Master Qui-Gon was not misled. My master set the bones himself on Melida/Daan, and yesterday, while I was in the bacta tank... he healed them."

Silence met this amazing statement. Twelve pairs of eyes glanced at the tall Master Jinn, who did not meet any of the glances, his expression as usual serene and impassive. After what Yoda had told them about Jinn yesterday... this met with no surprise.

Windu continued finally. "So you are able to stand before the Council, Obi-Wan Kenobi?"

He had not yet been addressed as "padawan", Obi-Wan noted, biting his lip nervously. "Yes..."

Qui-Gon broke in abruptly. "But he is as yet weak, for he is still recovering from the ordeal. I would like him to be allowed to sit."

Obi-Wan opened his mouth in protest, but closed it immediately. He must obey.

"Very well," Windu sighed, gesturing.

Qui-Gon retrieved a chair from near the entrance of the room and set it behind Obi-Wan. "Sit down, Padawan," he directed him softly.

[This is NOT the time to argue this,] Obi-Wan told himself sternly, though he felt fine and wanted to stand to face his judgment. "Yes, Master," he murmured softly and sat gracefully in the chair.

"Now," Windu went on as Qui-Gon stood beside the chair, his fingertips just grazing the boy's shoulder. "We have some serious charges against you, Obi-Wan Kenobi. Serious enough to warrant dismissal."

Obi-Wan felt the sudden tension in his Master. [Here it comes,] he noted, his own heart pounding. Despite everything that Qui-Gon had promised, the Council was going to send Obi-Wan away after all. And this time, if Qui-Gon persisted in teaching him, it would jeopardize his own status in the Order... or cause him to leave. Above all, Obi-Wan did not want his master to sacrifice his career, his lifelong commitment just because his padawan had been incredibly stupid.

"Deliberate disobedience..." Windu had started his list. "Taking transport without permission, defiance of your master's wishes, siding with unknown forces, endangering the rescue of a wounded Jedi... and refusing to return to the Temple with your master." He paused to gauge the boy's reaction. Obi-Wan was still, his face as impassive as his master's. "Master Jinn has already spoken in your defense. Because you were a Jedi Padawan, you must answer these charges before we can make any decisions about your future. Are you prepared to answer these accusations?"

"Yes, Master Windu," Obi-Wan said firmly, trying not to think about what was surely his immanent departure.

"First, the charge of disobedience."

Obi-Wan nodded. "Yes, I was disobedient to Master Qui-Gon. I did things without his permission, even when I knew he would disapprove. I erroneously accused him of 'adjusting' mission parameters to suit what he thought should happen on a mission, and then claimed that I could do the same as I saw fit. I was wrong to assume this. I... I do not have Master Jinn's experience or sensitivity to the Force."

"To what 'adjustment' do you refer, Obi-Wan?" Master Depa Billaba asked.

He wanted badly to look at Qui-Gon, apologize for bringing this up. But he couldn't, not here. "The mission on Gala, Master Billaba. Qui-Gon left me to observe the preparations for the elections at the palace alone while he went to talk to Elan of the hill people... who turned out to be the true heir. I confess I did not understand his reasoning at all at the time, and... and I resented it. But I was wrong to do so."

Windu nodded and repeated the second charge. "Taking transport without permission."

Obi-Wan took a deep breath. "Master, I was carried away by what I thought was a chance for peace on Melida/Daan, namely the efforts of the Young to stop their elders from the petty warring. The starfighter would give them an edge that they badly needed."

"Did you take it without permission?"

"Yes." Obi-Wan swallowed hard. "Yes, I took it."

"You knew that if something had damaged it, you not only would have left yourself and Master Jinn stranded on the planet, but Knight Tahl might have died because you could not have returned her to Jedi healers here on Coruscant."

Obi-Wan felt dizzy momentarily. It sounded like he'd tried to kill Tahl, the way Windu said it. "Y...yes, I realized that. And... I took it anyway."

"You sided with a force unknown to the Council on the planet, potentially assisting the worsening of the conditions there."

"I... I thought I was helping..."

"Admit it or not!" Windu was cold in his efforts to get Obi-Wan to confess completely. "You took sides with a force unknown to the Council."

"Yes," Obi-Wan admitted miserably. "I followed my heart..."

"And the Force was telling you what?" Master Mundi broke in.

[Nothing. I did not consult the Force. And that was my gravest error,] Obi-Wan thought, his fear growing. He cleared his throat and replied, "I... did not consult the Force. I... could not feel it, tap into it. There was too much emotion pulling at me. I allowed myself to be carried along."

"You refused to return with your master," Windu prompted him coolly.

Obi-Wan froze. [I violated my vows and his trust... all for a cause I thought was right.] Closing his eyes momentarily, he saw again how he himself had been betrayed by the Young. How they showed they were no better than their elders, seeking the path of violence. [I don't have the experience to make the decisions I made,] he realized, now understanding his true offense.

Arrogance.

"Answer the charge, Padawan," Qui-Gon whispered softly, his voice compassionate. [I understand...]

Obi-Wan straightened. "Yes, I refused to return with my master because I was too arrogant to trust him. I made decisions based on emotion rather than reason, and I refused to trust the experience and wisdom of my master."

The open and frank admission caused a stir among the Council members who were as much impressed with Obi-Wan's maturity as they were appalled by his actions. Qui-Gon looked down at the patterns on the Council chamber floor, unable to meet anyone's glance. He was still lightly touching his apprentice's back in silent support, though he was as shaken as any of them.

Windu held up a hand for quiet after a bit, turning again to the miserable youth. "It has been suggested that had you and Master Jinn bonded more closely, that you would not have rejected his counsel so thoroughly. Do you have anything to say about that, Obi-Wan?"

Obi-Wan wet his lips, glancing up sidelong at his master briefly before nodding to Master Windu. "Yes, sir... honestly I do not know how much of a difference it would have made. My decision to leave Master Jinn was a difficult one, for I owe him a great deal and he'd saved my life. Maybe it would have mattered. I hardened my heart against him because I was so convinced that I was doing what I had to do. I... I deeply regret the hurt I've caused him. I regret all of it."

A large hand fell fully on his shoulder. Obi-Wan swallowed a sob that threatened to get loose as a wave of forgiveness and concern washed through his mind from his master. "I am so sorry, Master," he murmured. "I swear I will never betray you again."

Qui-Gon glanced at Windu, seeking to speak to the boy. When the senior Council member nodded, Qui-Gon turned and knelt beside Obi-Wan's chair, facing him. "I am sorry, too, Padawan," he said gravely, taking the boy's hand in his. "I am sorry you had to face such a decision with the bond between us so weak. I have admitted to you my fault in that. I hope we can recover what we had and build on it."

Mace Windu cleared his throat. "We are not through here, Master Jinn," he reminded him sternly. "Obi-Wan's fate is yet to be determined. The Council will decide whether he may return to the Order, and even whether he is to train under you again."

Qui-Gon stood abruptly and faced Windu, hands on his hips in a challenging posture. [We have already begun to re-bond, Windu. He is contrite. You surely can't mean to send him away now!]

The tension in the room rose dramatically. Obi-Wan gulped, feeling it through the Force, but not understanding what was going on, except that his master was evidently confronting Windu.

Windu looked back at the maverick Jedi Master, his face stony. [That is for us to decide, Jinn.]

On the verge of calling a Council Member an 'arrogant bastard', Qui-Gon subsided, nodding his reluctant acquiescence. He glanced at Yoda who was watching Obi-Wan, then relaxed his posture and returned to stand beside the boy's chair.

"Are there any other issues, questions?" Windu asked of his colleagues.

There were none. "Master Jinn, Obi-Wan, please wait in the anteroom until you are called."

In the anteroom, Obi-Wan sank into a chair and bent over, his face in his hands. He just wished the whole thing was over so he could disappear into the galaxy and not hurt anyone again.

"Obi-Wan," Qui-Gon said softly, going down on one knee beside the chair. "I will train you, I promise. I know you won't betray me again."

Obi-Wan straightened with a frown. "No, Master, that isn't right... you should not defy the Council. I deserve to be dismissed. I couldn't bear it if you..."

"Shhh..." Qui-Gon touched the boy's cheek gently. "We must trust in the Force, my young Padawan. And trust that the Force will guide the Council. We are already growing closer... I feel it."

Obi-Wan smiled shyly. "I feel it as well, Master." Then the smile dissolved to a look of horror as he remembered... "Master, I..." He remembered - he'd drawn his lightsaber against his master! And the Council had not called him on it! That alone earned his dismissal.

The Jedi Master laid his fingertips over the boy's lips, preventing him from speaking. [They do not know of that. That will remain between us.] He glanced around meaningfully. The room had listening devices.

"But..." Obi-Wan frowned, bewildered, then subsided, grateful that his master could overlook so grave an action. "Yes, Master."

The door opened suddenly. [Already?] both thought. The brevity of the session was either a very good sign or a very bad one. Master Piell peeked through. "Please come back in, Master Jinn, Padawan Kenobi."

A wild hope arose within Obi-Wan to hear his former title. Did that mean...? [Do not assume anything,] he told himself sternly, preceding his master back into the Council Chamber.

This time Obi-Wan remained standing to face his sentence. But to his relief and gratitude, Qui-Gon stood behind him, both hands on his shoulders, clearly showing his support.

Windu glanced at Yoda. The most ancient of the Jedi, Master Yoda could be very persuasive... and in fact, most of the arguments had already been made, which is why the private session had been so short. Sighing, Windu looked back at the pair in the center of the chamber. "The Council has decided to place Padawan Kenobi on one year probation, with monthly evaluations. Failing any evaluation will mean immediate dismissal. He is also required to take a refresher course in Jedi philosophy. He will not be allowed to take part in any Jedi competitions or demonstrations during this year, and privileges to leave the Temple for recreation while on Coruscant are summarily revoked."

[I'm not being sent away! And I'll be able to continue my training,] Obi-Wan thought with glad relief as he bowed to the Council in acceptance. [Though being on probation means all my friends will know finally... but I deserve that.]

The senior Jedi Master was continuing. "Master Jinn is censured for a period of six months for his omissions to his padawan. The two of you will be evaluated monthly by Master Yoda for the period of Obi-Wan's probation. Any failure of an evaluation will mean your separation."

Qui-Gon bowed his acceptance, Obi-Wan bowing again with him. [I will not fail you again, my Padawan,] the Master thought warmly into his student's mind.

"One more thing there is," Yoda spoke up suddenly... for the first time today. "Bond together, you must. Master Poof and myself will assist if necessary. One month, remain at the Temple you will. Bond, form the mind-communion... work to develop Obi-Wan's potential. Before return to the field you will be allowed."

Qui-Gon stilled, surprised. One month out of the field! Well, he supposed it was folly to try to achieve the bond they needed while on a mission.

Obi-Wan, however, gaped at the diminutive master. [Potential?] He would have to ask Master Qui-Gon when they got out of here.

Then they were bowing together again to Master Yoda, signifying their acceptance. "We will comply, my Master," Qui-Gon responded for them both.

Yoda waved them back to the anteroom... following them. Once in the room, he tapped his stick on the floor, gesturing for them to come down to his level. Together they knelt, then Qui-Gon sat back on his heels, hands relaxed on his thighs. Obi-Wan copied the position hastily. Then Yoda peered at the boy, studying him, leaning on his stick.

"Master Yoda," Obi-Wan said after a couple very long minutes, "what potential?" He glanced abruptly at Qui-Gon. "Master... is this that telepathic thing you were telling me about?"

Yoda and Qui-Gon exchanged glances. "Yes, Padawan," Qui-Gon replied.

"Powerful telepath, your master is," Yoda responded gravely, then gently tapped at the boy's leg. "Extraordinary to heal like that. Close to the Living Force he is, Padawan."

Obi-Wan was still adjusting to the fact he was not being dismissed from the order, but his quick mind was also racing ahead to explore this new facet of himself. "Will I... am I going to be like that? I mean, if you develop my telepathic potential?"

Qui-Gon looked down at the boy, smiling a little. "Yes, Obi-Wan. I'm grateful that the Council is giving us this time to work on that... and especially on our bond." He turned to Yoda. "Master, Obi-Wan and I wish to repeat our vows to one another again. I would be honored if you would witness them."

"Well, this is," Yoda replied, nodding. "Mean them this time, you shall."

Obi-Wan had collapsed from exhaustion upon their return to their quarters, for he'd insisted that he could walk back from the Council chambers. Qui-Gon had gently scolded him, then wrapped his arms around the boy, holding him close, at last mentally sharing the relief and joy that they'd been given a second chance. Obi-Wan, too, as far as his weakness would allow, hugged his huge Master back tightly.

[Our bond is already re-forming,] Qui-Gon murmured to him, smiling. [Look...] He showed the boy what he could see in their link.

"I'll never take this for granted again, Master," Obi-Wan vowed fervently, blinking back tears as he looked within to what Qui-Gon was showing him. "I will devote myself to being a Jedi Padawan in the fullest sense of what that is."

"Tonight, in Master Yoda's presence, you'll repeat these promises, Padawan," Qui-Gon said quietly. "We will make our vows together, then in this next month we'll work on developing our mind-communion. When we're allowed to return to the field, we'll be the team we should be."

"Yes, Master," Obi-Wan replied happily.

The rest of the day passed calmly in their quarters. Qui-Gon would not let Obi-Wan do anything physical other than put his things away and arrange his room to his liking. And that was only after a long nap. The Master himself took a short nap, then settled down at the table in their common room to respond to the pile-up of mail on his datapad.

That was stressful; besides messages from his own acquaintances, there were messages to him from Obi-Wan's friends, former teachers... and a few busy-bodies who really should have minded their own business. [So, word has gone around after all. Very well.] Qui-Gon waded into the messages, responding succinctly and without emotion. In every reply, he stressed that the Master-Padawan bond between him and his apprentice was going to be reworked, strengthened. And made it clear neither of them held any resentment against the other for the past.

It took the rest of the afternoon. After clearing all but a handful of messages to Obi-Wan's friends - for he wanted to do those with his padawan - Qui-Gon closed down his datapad, his eyes burning from the long, close work. Obi-Wan had gone back to sleep again a couple hours ago after working in his room.

Rising from the table, Qui-Gon went into the boy's room. He sat carefully on the edge of the bed, then, smiling at the peaceful young face, reached to touch Obi-Wan's new padawan braid, the light brown hair soft and fine. [Rest well, my fierce one,] he whispered into the youth's mind, slipping him deeper into sleep. He paused as a last, stubborn twinge of anguish pushed its way to the front. He would have to guard his pride closely so it would not blind him to the boy's faults... or needs. [Obi-Wan is nothing like Xanatos,] he told himself for the hundredth time. [In fact, rather than feigning care, he cares deeply...]

Qui-Gon recalled when he'd confronted his padawan about what he was throwing away, and Obi-Wan had thrown back, "I don't care." The Jedi Master didn't believe that then, and certainly could not believe it now. Obi-Wan Kenobi was Jedi to the core. He'd reacted in passion, unable to discern the Force because of the powerful emotions buffeting him from all directions. Now, together, they would learn how to guard against that, to focus Obi-Wan's being on the Force first.

"Master," came a sigh from the bed as the boy stirred. "Is everything all right, Master?" He sleepily opened his eyes to peer up at the tall Jedi.

"Yes, and you should be getting up, Padawan," Qui-Gon smiled. "Or else you'll be wide awake in the middle of the night. There are some messages I'd like you to help me respond to... and we need to make up a schedule for you for the coming week." He slapped the boy affectionately on his good leg and stood up.

Just then Obi-Wan's stomach growled. The Master chuckled and added, "And it sounds like dinner needs to be the first order of business. I had some supplies sent up; I'll see about preparing a meal."

"Sounds good to me, Master," Obi-Wan sighed, gingerly swinging his legs over the side of the bed.

Qui-Gon watched him from the doorway, concerned. "Any pain or dizziness?"

"No, sir," Obi-Wan answered honestly, but he stood up slowly anyway. "I feel fine... just hungry."

While Qui-Gon bustled around the tiny kitchen, Obi-Wan dressed in his tunics and pants, then arranged his tabard and put on the sash and belt. He pulled on his boots, noting that he'd have to spend time polishing them before going out again, then turned around, thinking that something was missing. The new robe... no, that was hanging up.

Then he knew, and all the blood drained from his face. His lightsaber. [I suppose I'll have time to make a new one,] he thought ruefully.

Feeling strange, he emerged from his new room just as the door chime sounded. When he touched the controls to open the door, he saw Yoda on the other side. "Come in, Master Yoda," he said with a quick bow, relieved to see the little master.

"Looking better, you are, Padawan," Yoda murmured, shuffling in. "How feel you, hmmm?"

Obi-Wan smiled, relaxing. "Much better, Master, thank you. Master Jinn is fixing us some dinner."

Qui-Gon appeared at the kitchen doorway abruptly, a rare smirk on his face. "Master Yoda is staying for dinner, I assume. He loves my cooking." He winked at the miniature Jedi, then ducked back into the kitchen.

"Get so big eating my cooking, he did not," Yoda snorted, climbing up into a chair at the table.

In minutes, Qui-Gon laid the food out after clearing off the table of its usual clutter. Yoda did not wait for an invitation, helping himself to the simple fare of steamed vegetables, cheese, and bread. Obi-Wan pulled over a third chair. As they ate, the boy thought about the reason why Yoda had come - the vows he and his Master would make to each other tonight.

[I didn't really think about it much before,] Obi-Wan noted soberly. [Just like I never made time to do my birthday meditation. I was too puffed up with *what* I was, and took no time to truly *be* Qui-Gon's padawan. And we've been so busy...]

His thoughts trailed off as something distracted him. Of course the physical differences between Qui-Gon Jinn and his former master were huge, but here was yet another difference: how the two men ate. Yoda was fairly stuffing his face, humming to himself and making little comments about seasonings. Qui-Gon, on the other hand, was eating slowly as if thinking about every bite, oblivious to the tiny master's commentary. From what Obi-Wan knew of his master, Qui-Gon was as intense and intent upon eating like on everything else he did and everything that surrounded him. It was a peculiar contrast. Yet Obi-Wan knew that despite their differences, these two Jedi had shared a close training bond and Yoda still considered Qui-Gon a favorite, even if he was a maverick. [Qui-Gon and I are a lot more alike,] he noted, hoping that was a good thing.

Qui-Gon was silently musing on much the same thing. [When I was a padawan learner, I was quite a handful for Yoda myself.] He almost smiled, remembering the tall, lanky youth he'd been, wielding his lightsaber with extraordinary force, doing everything with large, encompassing motions until he'd learned grace and efficiency of movement. But he and his master had seemed an odd pair... until one happened across them meditating together in the Temple gardens, an aura of Light fairly radiating around them, the plants literally growing before one's eyes. It was Master Yoda who had honed the deeply empathic Qui-Gon Jinn's sense of the Living Force. [Broke quite a few lightsaber handles, I did,] he mused.

"Tonight," Yoda offered suddenly, breaking into their thoughts, "make your vows you will not."

Both human Jedi looked up in astonishment. The Jedi Master recovered first. "Yoda is right; we're not ready, Obi-Wan. I need... *we* need to meditate for a good while beforehand to prepare." Qui-Gon sighed, looking over apologetically to the boy. "And I think it would be good for us to have more witnesses... friends, those close to us."

"Agree with Qui-Gon, I do," Yoda explained to Obi-Wan who had paled with this unexpected decision. "Ready tomorrow night you will be. Meditate, Padawan. Connect first to the Force, then each other."

"You're right," Obi-Wan agreed reluctantly. "I do need to be more centered. I... I have not meditated much in a while."

"You will have extended time for that this month," Qui-Gon said quietly. "In fact, when we're on missions, unless the situation is an emergency, I am going to insist on regular meditation for both of us. It is all too easy to get caught up in things without pausing to allow the Force to guide you." He met his padawan's abruptly guilty look, his own gaze compassionate and not accusatory. "I'm afraid, Padawan, that I tend to rely on my intuition far too much. It proves so accurate so often that I can get lost in the Force myself, not pausing to realign myself with the world around me... and you. Meditation pulls one back to a fuller awareness of one's being, their environment, and the movements of the Force in both. Without our repeated re-focusing, we Jedi can drift into areas of danger. I cannot allow myself to be at one with the mission at the expense of my student, for example."

"Yes, Master," Obi-Wan replied solemnly. "And I cannot allow myself to focus on small issues at the expense of the whole. Or you. I understand, Master."

"Let the Force guide you, always," Yoda murmured.

When the ancient master had gone, Obi-Wan rose a bit stiffly to collect the dinner things, waving off Qui-Gon's questioning look with a smile. "I can resume my duties for you, at least," he murmured, going into the kitchen. When he came back out a few minutes later, Qui-Gon had the datapad activated. "The messages, Master?"

Qui-Gon gave him an ironic sigh. "Your Temple friends are quite besides themselves with concern, so we should clear these first."

Obi-Wan gratefully slid back down onto a chair. "Bant," he sighed, naming his closest friend, a salmon-skinned Mon Calamarian girl a year younger than he. "Let me guess, Yoda warned everyone off showing up here, right? Otherwise Bant would have been here long ago. What does she say?"

The Master handed over the datapad. Obi-Wan queued the message up. Immediately the tiny screen filled with the girl's face, her huge silver eyes blinking rapidly to reveal her distress. "Master Jinn, we heard... is Obi back? Is he all right? Please forgive me for contacting you, Master, but no one is telling us anything. Garen, Reeft and I are worried... and others. Can you please just let us know something? Thank you, Master Jinn. Bant, out."

Obi-Wan looked up and met Qui-Gon's glance. "May I respond to her, Master?"

"Yes, of course, Padawan." Qui-Gon leaned back in his chair, relaxing.

The boy called his best friend on the datapad. Immediately the screen filled again with the face of the Mon Calamarian. "Obi!!" she exclaimed excitedly. "Are you all right? Where are you?"

Obi-Wan smiled. "I'm with Master Qui-Gon in our quarters, Bant. Yes, I'm all right..."

"We heard you'd left the Order," she interrupted abruptly with a gasp.

Quickly the boy glanced at his teacher. [This is between you, me, and the Council,] Qui-Gon sent back silently. [Unless you want this known. I will accept your decision.]

Obi-Wan nodded to Qui-Gon, then answered, "Let's just say, Bant, that there have been a lot of emotion and misunderstandings. I have made some big mistakes, and as a result, I am on probation for a year. Which I deserve..."

"Oh, Obi!" the girl exclaimed with distress. "You cannot talk about it?"

The boy sighed. "Please, Bant, I need to put this behind me. The details are no good to anyone but Master Qui-Gon and myself. I'm not very proud of myself right now and..."

Qui-Gon spoke up abruptly, coming around behind Obi-Wan's shoulder so the girl could see him on her screen. "And Obi-Wan is still recovering from his ordeal, Bant," he said gently. "Someday I'm sure he will feel more like sharing the experience with you. The important thing is that he is all right."

The Mon Calamarian gulped again, nodding. "When can I see you, Obi-Wan?"

Obi-Wan looked to his master. "Tomorrow?"

Qui-Gon smiled, laying a hand on the boy's shoulder. "Bant, why don't you join us for midmeal tomorrow? Garen and Reeft too, of course."

Both human Jedi were adept at reading Mon Calamarian. When her wide slash of a mouth untensed, they knew she was relieved. "Oh, thank you, Master Jinn!"

"You will have to come up here," Qui-Gon added with a smile. "Obi-Wan is recovering from a broken leg and is unable to get around much."

"I can walk," Obi-Wan broke in hastily. "But I get tired easily," he admitted.

"We have others to contact, Bant," Qui-Gon said gently. "We will see you tomorrow, then."

"Yes, of course. Thank you, Master Jinn. Obi, it's so good to see that you're all right."

"Thanks, Bant," Obi-Wan grinned at his friend.

Between the two of them, the rest of the messages were quickly handled, as were the waiting messages on Obi-Wan's own datapad. When they were finished, the boy was exhausted again. Qui-Gon took the datapad from him, then helped him stand.

"Master," the boy sighed, "may I ask you a question?"

"Of course, Padawan," Qui-Gon murmured, a hand to the boy's back as he took a couple careful steps.

"May we hold our vow ceremony in the gardens?"

One large hand came up to touch the root of the boy's padawan braid as a stab of emotion went through the Jedi Master. "Yes, Padawan, I would like that," he replied quietly.

The following morning was spent in quiet meditation, both Jedi settled onto meditation mats on the floor of their common room, facing one another. Once in a while, Obi-Wan opened an eye to steal a glance at his master, noting with his usual awe at the calm serenity on Qui-Gon's noble features. Obi-Wan, too, felt peaceful, then belatedly realized that a good bit of that peace was in fact bleeding over to him from his new link with Qui-Gon.

For several long minutes, Obi-Wan just rested in the gentle peace exuding from his master. Then, subconsciously or otherwise, he opened his mind more to their bond, wanting more of that calm. Smiling, he felt a pulse of happiness as more surged across to him.

[Padawan?] the voice of his master whispered into his mind. Pleased, the Jedi Master focused on their fledgling bond, stabilizing the widened connection. [This is very good, Obi-Wan, you are learning to open to me.]

[Master...] But as yet the boy could not send thought across the bond. "Master," he whispered aloud, "I like this..."

Unexpectedly a thread of remorse wafted across to him. [We should have worked on this from the very beginning, Padawan,] Qui-Gon returned, revealing his anguish. [I was afraid to...]

"Master?" Obi-Wan opened his eyes to see Qui-Gon watching him, the pain evident in his eyes.

"Yes, Obi-Wan," Qui-Gon murmured. "We ran into Xanatos almost immediately, you remember. An unwelcome reminder of what happened the last time I opened my mind and heart to someone. I foolishly told myself to wait until you'd proven that I could trust you."

[Oh, no, and then I proved I couldn't be trusted,] Obi-Wan thought with a hard pang. He opened his mouth to say something, but the elder Jedi was already continuing, looking away.

"That was a critical mistake. I held myself back from you. Without that personal connection, you did not trust me... and so began to question my actions." Qui-Gon closed his eyes briefly, dispelling the pain in his heart. When he opened them, a measure of the calm had returned. "It is my belief, as well as my hope, that if we become closer on a personal level, that we will be able to achieve the mind-communion that we need. I was so blinded by my fears that I denied this, though I knew it well. I am deeply sorry for that, Obi-Wan."

"I know, and I am, too, for all of my part in it," Obi-Wan said softly. "We are starting over, Master. I know it will work this time."

The corner of Qui-Gon's mouth quirked up into a smile. "Well, there is something good that has come out of all this, Padawan. You now know without a shadow of doubt that a Jedi Master is just another sentient being."

"No, Master," the boy said quickly, grinning. "Not just another. I had respect for you then - though I did act without respect - and I do have it now. You are not just another being. You are a Jedi Master... you are Qui-Gon Jinn."

"And what does that mean?" Qui-Gon shrugged.

Obi-Wan sobered. "You are wise in the ways of the Force, especially the Living Force. You're a great warrior..."

Qui-Gon snorted with self-derision. "A Jedi great in the ways of war is not a great Jedi, Padawan. We do not make war, and fighting is always a last resort. I am a man of peace, or so I like to think I am." He sighed. "We are entering difficult times, Obi-Wan. There are currents in the Force that did not used to be there. My strength is in the moment, not reading the future, but even I can feel this."

"I have so much to learn," Obi-Wan sighed. "I know I have many years ahead of me before I will become - Force willing - a Jedi Knight."

"It will be hard." Qui-Gon had sobered, knowing all too well the path the boy had ahead of him. "Often answers to your questions will not come easily. Or decisions. That is why we learn to read the currents of the Force, to become attentive to its will. We quiet our minds to hear it whispering to us. Strong emotions too often cloud that hearing. It is not that we do not come to care about what is happening around us, Padawan, but that we balance the caring with the wisdom of experience and the fluctuations in the Force. To be Jedi means we leave behind the ways of most men, the aggressiveness that brings power. Our power is in becoming a feather in the wind of the Force."

Obi-Wan nodded, realizing with joy that Qui-Gon Jinn had much to teach him and that learning under his mentorship would be a rare treasure. Eyes shining, he bowed. "Yes, Master. I will remember."

When time came for the midday meal, only Obi-Wan's three closest friends came to join him and his master, although Obi-Wan got the impression from Bant that she'd warned off curious others, at least for this meeting.

Bant hugged him hard, then pulled the other two boys over to at least shake hands with Obi-Wan as neither of them were very demonstrative. The greeting over, they bowed to Master Jinn who smiled at them, then went back into the kitchenette to finish the meal preparations.

"So, how's the leg?" Garen, a tall lanky boy, asked as they sat down at the common table.

"Healed," Obi-Wan murmured, gnawing on a piece of bread. "I just have to get my energy back, recover my strength."

Bant and Garen exchanged worried glances. Reeft looked up belatedly, a jam-laden piece of bread already crammed into his mouth.

Obi-Wan continued quickly, hoping to forestall the interrogation. "Master Qui-Gon and I had been too busy on our first missions to hold a proper vow ceremony, so we're planning to have a real one this evening to repeat our Master-Padawan vows." He smiled around at them, apparently serene. "It will be held in the gardens, and you're invited to attend."

Just then Qui-Gon came out with a tray of food, which he placed in the center of the table. He, too, smiled. "Yes, please do come," he said quietly, then sat down beside Obi-Wan.

"We'd love to," Bant replied, looking from one to the other, a few extra wrinkles in the salmon-colored, spotted skin of her forehead revealing her wariness. Something did not seem quite right between Obi-Wan and his master. Repeat their vows?

"Sure," Garen responded, then nudged Reeft, who was busy assembling a stack of cold meats, cheese, and bread on his plate. "Yes, happy to come," Reeft hastily added.

"Master Qui-Gon and I will be here at the Temple for the next month," Obi-Wan informed them, starting to make a similar stack on his plate.

"Why?" Bant blurted out. Both Master and Padawan gave her a sharp look suddenly. "I mean, ah, so you can get your strength back, right?"

Obi-Wan glanced over at his master, who glanced back. [If it would help to tell your friends, you may, of course,] Qui-Gon murmured into his mind.

The boy studied his master's eyes for a moment longer, then looked back at his friends. Bant was his closest friend, and the other two boys had been loyal to him for years. While he wasn't eager to have the whole Temple privy to his shortcomings - and his master's - his friends deserved to know. "Yes, I need to get my strength back," Obi-Wan said slowly with a sigh. "But it's more than that. My master and I have need to work on developing our Master-Padawan bond. Due to our recent missions, it's been... damaged."

"We heard you'd left the Order," Garen murmured, speaking for them all what they'd been loathe to verify.

Obi-Wan shot him a glance. "In a manner of speaking, yes," he replied. As he admitted it, he felt Qui-Gon's hand settle on his shoulder in quiet support. The light pressure strengthened him. "I refused to return to Coruscant with my master in order to aid a group of children on a planet, a group which was in effect a third and unknown political force on the planet which the Council did not know about."

"You're here now," Bant said softly, her silver eyes glistening.

Sighing, Obi-Wan nodded. "I am under probation for a year," he admitted.

"And I am under censure for six months," Qui-Gon added, to Obi-Wan's shock. "So, you see, we have some work to do to get Obi-Wan's training back on track." He spoke calmly, confident in his padawan's decision to tell of their failure to his friends.

"We'll be fine," Obi-Wan hastily added, "In fact, we've already started to work on our bond. That's the important part."

None of the other children were padawans yet. But they knew that a Padawan Learner must develop a close mental bond with his or her Master in order to both aid their training and help them on missions. Evidently Obi-Wan hadn't been able to bond enough with Qui-Gon Jinn... yet.

Bant looked from one to the other, then back to the Jedi Master. "Master Jinn, we're just... concerned. We want Obi-Wan to be happy, is all."

Qui-Gon smiled at the Mon Calamarian. "Then we all have the same goal, do we not? I assure you that I want that as much as you do. He's a fine Padawan."

"Who has been far too cocky and arrogant," Obi-Wan admitted ruefully. "You know me, I always have to learn things the hard way."

"Oh, Obi..."

"May I have some cake?" Reeft suddenly inquired.

The rest of the midday meal went rather more quietly.

Qui-Gon rose to clear the table when they were done. "I should be doing that," Obi-Wan said suddenly, jumping up. But he was waved back down.

"Stay and visit with your friends, Padawan," Qui-Gon said quietly. "I need to reserve a practice room and do a few more things around the Temple." [I will see you later this afternoon, perhaps for a final meditation together? Then we will go to the gardens.]

Obi-Wan nodded, sighing. "Yes, Master."

When Qui-Gon had left, Bant rounded on Obi-Wan. "Obi, tell us about Master Jinn - we know he'd lost his last padawan. What happened between you two?"

"Or didn't happen," Garen added.

Obi-Wan held up his hands. "Hey, if you don't mind, *some* of this is private, between myself and Qui-Gon only."

"What's he like?" Reeft asked.

"Yeah..." Garen wanted to know, too.

Obi-Wan sighed. "All right - Master Qui-Gon is a very powerful Jedi... but he's still hurting a great deal from the betrayal of his last padawan. As a result, he hasn't exactly welcomed me with open arms, and I guess he resisted the development of our bond. Which, by the way, was already working before he'd even accepted me as Padawan. He's a very private man, and probably wasn't ready to accept another Padawan..." He folded his arms in front of him, looking intently from one friend to the others. "Nevertheless, I believe we're right for each other. The Force wills it. We're going to have to accept help for a while, and we're to be evaluated monthly, but I believe that we'll come out of this stronger. He does, too."

"You seem pretty confident of that, Obi," Bant murmured.

"I am," Obi-Wan responded quietly. "This whole last mission I think cut us both down to size... me, especially. And I needed it. I'm grateful to get this fresh start over with him. The Council *could* have dismissed me, but I have another chance." He took a deep breath. "I won't mess it up, not now."

"Why?" Reeft spoke up suddenly. "Why did you defy your master?"

It was the question they all needed the answer to... why their close friend, who had grown up in the Jedi creche at the Temple with them since babyhood, who had wanted so badly to be a Padawan Learner... why had he thrown it all away?

Obi-Wan closed his eyes, reluctantly remembering. "I thought I'd found a cause worth dying for. It turned out that same cause did not want me, only the advantage I could give them. I wasn't one of THEM. Qui-Gon came back to rescue me, even though I'd rejected his advice and help. I... I was too caught up in emotion to read the Force properly, and so I made some very poor decisions." He stopped short of telling them he'd actually drawn his lightsaber against his master. The very thought of that made him feel sick again.

"Master Jinn was within his rights to make you leave against your will," Bant reminded him gently. She laid a hand on his arm. "Sorry if I'm having trouble understanding this, Obi, but I still just have a very hard time believing that when you left here you wanted nothing more than to be a Padawan... and a few weeks later you wanted to..."

"I know," Obi-Wan said firmly and a little loudly. "I can't explain it. I goofed. I was stupid, all right? I'm not proud of it, believe me."

"All right, Obi," Bant demurred hastily. "We just want to make sure you're all right. And that Master Jinn isn't, ah..."

"Isn't what?" Obi-Wan asked hotly.

Garen rolled his eyes at Bant, then answered for her. "Isn't treating you like a piece of furniture, or his personal servant - you know some Masters do that."

"He isn't like that," Obi-Wan insisted, though there was a ring of truth in what they'd feared. But since rescuing him from Melida/Daan, Qui-Gon had been solicitous and caring. "Just because he has some emotional issues to deal with - which he *is* - doesn't mean he isn't a good Master. I am very lucky to have Qui-Gon Jinn as my master."

The others added the thought that Obi-Wan was lucky to have a master at all, indeed, it sounded like Obi-Wan was lucky to even be a Jedi after that last mission. "I hope so," Bant murmured. "We care about you, Obi."

"As does he."

Garen sighed and elbowed Bant. "We've got a class... I guess we'll see you tonight, Obi?"

Obi-Wan nodded, relaxing. He didn't want to argue with his friends, and he believed that Qui-Gon and himself would bond as they should now. "Yes, it would mean a lot to me if you are all there. It will be in the Thon Meditation Garden." This was a special segment of the garden named after a famous Jedi Master from millennia ago.

Bant hugged him good-bye, and to his surprise, so did Garen and Reeft. "We're in this with you, Obi," Garen murmured, giving him a sideways grin. "You're trouble and you need us to watch out for you."

"Yeah, right," Obi-Wan snorted, then laughed with them.

Qui-Gon called him on the comlink a short while later. "Padawan, I'm in the seventh floor practice room here in the Masters' tower. Would you like to join me? Do not worry, I will not require much from you. But there are a few easy strengthening exercises I can show you for your leg."

A flush of joy went through the youth. "Certainly, Master. I would like that. I'll be there in a couple minutes."

Hastily he changed to a practice tunic. Then, just as he was about to rush out the door, a wave of dizziness hit him, causing him to stumble and collapse to the floor unexpectedly. A stab of pain shot through his healing leg. For a moment he'd just sat there on the floor while he regained his orientation, then he struggled to his feet. By the time he stood shakily on his feet again, a strong hand was under his arm, steadying him.

"Padawan?"

It was his master. Sagging against him, still dizzy, Obi-Wan wondered how long he was actually sitting on the floor. "Master, sorry, I got dizzy when I tried to rush."

"Then no exercises for you today, Obi-Wan," Qui-Gon replied with concern. "Perhaps we should postpone tonight's ceremony..."

"NO!" Obi-Wan said rather more harshly than he'd intended. "No, please, Master. I do not want to wait. I want... I want to make my vows to you..."

Unexpectedly his emotions surged up and Obi-Wan was abruptly sobbing into the front of his master's tunic, holding onto his tabard with both fists. It was something he hadn't done since he was a small boy, crying into the creche master's chest after a visit with his family.

Long arms wrapped around the youth, and a large hand lifted to press his head against the hard chest. [Let it out, Padawan,] Qui-Gon sent into his mind, adding a subtle wave of comfort. [Come, sit down with me.] Slowly he steered the sobbing boy over to the couch and got him seated beside him. For long minutes they sat there, Obi-Wan giving himself over to the catharsis, Qui-Gon holding him, his arms wrapped around the boy's shoulders.

Then, still snuffling, Obi-Wan got a hold of his emotional outburst, embarrassment settling in due to losing control so badly in front of his master. "Sorry," he muttered, turning his face away. "I don't know where that came from."

"Of course you do," Qui-Gon whispered. Then he hesitated, releasing the boy as Obi-Wan straightened, wiping his eyes. "Are you sure about tonight, Padawan?"

Obi-Wan looked up at his master finally, his wide, blue eyes serious. "Yes, Master," he whispered back fervently. "I want to be your Padawan Learner. I want you to train me to be a Jedi Knight. No other."

Qui-Gon sat back, regarding his padawan with wonder. "Your fervor honors you, Obi-Wan," he replied quietly. "Hold onto that." He reached and touched a finger to the boy's cheek for a moment. "I will train you and see you to your Knighthood. I promise."

It didn't need to be said; the "promise" would only hold if either of them managed to stay alive through the years of missions together, some of which were bound to be dangerous. But Obi-Wan understood what his master meant anyway.

After Obi-Wan took an otherwise unscheduled nap, he rose to find a note from his master:

Obi-Wan, Spend an hour in meditation. Do not eat anything; we should fast until the ceremony. I will come for you soon to help you to the gardens. Until then, my Padawan. Master Qui-Gon

Something about the note made the boy's heart ache. Perhaps it was the simple "my Padawan". [He's truly accepted me at last,] Obi-Wan thought, hugging the datapad to his chest. [Now we can bond. How could I ever have left him?]

Unbidden, an image came to mind. Cerasi. The Melidan girl had screamed at him when he had held back from joining her and Nield in the killing of their elders. What had started as a freedom ploy for all Melida and Daan, had degraded into a systematic elimination of the other age group. The elders sought to destroy their own children, and the Young themselves ended up killing their elders, considering them too entrenched in their racism to change. It was a madness Obi-Wan had never seen before, and it had come from such a noble cause.

But he could not have joined in their killing. He had watched in horror as Cerasi was struck down, then froze when the Daan who'd killed her had turned to him... then turned away. Obi-Wan had been bewildered to be spared, until, in the detention camp, he'd been turned out with the words, "You are not Melida, you're not even Daan... you are nothing, boy. Go die somewhere else."

Obi-Wan arranged his tabard on his shoulders, then wound his sash around his waist. He put on his belt over the sash, then put the meditation mat into place. Sinking to his knees, he noted with relief that his leg gave him only a twinge. He settled back on his heels and closed his eyes.

He wasn't "nothing". He was Jedi. All the more now that he knew what he'd nearly thrown away.

Taking slower, deeper breaths, Obi-Wan eased into a meditative trance. He let his senses be filled with the presence of the Force surrounding him. [I am Jedi, a Jedi Padawan,] he thought with a quiet joy. [The Force is my guide and my strength, and I will use it to bring peace and justice where I can.]

[Except on Melida/Daan.] The unwanted thought caused a tiny ripple in the Force. Frowning, Obi-Wan worked on settling deeper into his trance. [What could we have done differently? We had to bring Knight Tahl back to Coruscant...]

Then it occurred to him that his own intervention with the Young had tipped the balance, made the Young dangerous enough for the elders to consider the need to eliminate them. [Oh, Force, no...] A choked sob f ound its way out, then Obi-Wan was completely out of the trance, shaking with the effort to keep from going back into his earlier hysterics. [I didn't know, I couldn't have known,] he tried to console himself, but all he could see was the faces of the dead Young and those they themselves had killed. Too many dead faces...

Slowly, as he took a few gulping breaths to steady himself, Obi-Wan became aware of a calming influence in his mind. With a rush, he realized it was his master simply touching their link lightly, just a subtle reminder: [I am here. You are not alone. No one condemns you.] He realized that Qui-Gon could feel his dismay.

[He's not rushing to my side,] Obi-Wan thought, and was relieved. [Good, I need to come to peace on this in my own way. I have done something terrible and I must learn to live with it.] Despite how calm his thoughts were, he was trembling. Resolute, he returned to his meditative trance with difficulty. It took him the better part of twenty minutes to calm himself down and slip into the trance.

When the hour was up, Obi-Wan felt considerably calmer, a measure of Jedi serenity returned to him. [I cannot undo what I have done,] he thought, accepting. [I can only ensure I do not act like that again. With all the power at my command, Force willing.]

Abruptly he felt a slight shift in the Force, and smiled. His master was home. [Home, this is *my* home now,] he thought, glancing around his room. Gingerly he got to his feet and went out into the common room. "Good afternoon, Master," he murmured, looking up at the tall Jedi Master.

Qui-Gon smiled. "Good afternoon. How are you feeling, Padawan?"

Obi-Wan put his weight on one foot and flexed the leg that had been broken. "Much better, Master. It doesn't hurt at all, well, hardly at all." He grinned up at his teacher. "No running for me, I know."

"How is your head?" Qui-Gon asked, lifting his hand to the boy's forehead. He ran a large thumb across Obi-Wan's temple, looking intently into his wide, blue eyes. "Any dizziness?"

"No, Master," Obi-Wan replied, holding still for the inspection. "Master... thank you."

The hand fell to the boy's shoulder. "For what, Padawan?"

"I could sense you during my meditation," Obi-Wan whispered, ducking his head shyly. "You helped me when I got upset again. I could feel your presence."

Qui-Gon felt a twinge, knowing all too well what the boy had been through. "I am glad I could help, Obi-Wan. Someday you will help me like that, too. We shall become a source of strength for one another. I look forward to that."

Obi-Wan nodded, feeling too much to speak. Then a little gasp escaped him as Qui-Gon touched the short brushy end of his padawan braid. There was something wonderful in that little touch, something... loving. He recalled Qui-Gon's words on Melida/Daan - "As my Padawan, you have first rights to my heart... and my love." Could it be true?

"There's an old tradition regarding padawan braids," Qui-Gon murmured, fingering the soft, light brown hair between his fingers. "Frequently a padawan's master would braid strands of his own hair into the new apprentice's braid. With your permission, I would like to follow that tradition, Obi-Wan."

"I... I would like that," Obi-Wan stammered. The eyes he lifted to his master were glistening.

"Come, sit down, Padawan," Qui-Gon said, holding out a chair for him. Then he went to get the little knife he used to trim his beard. He sat in a chair that he moved close to Obi-Wan's. As the boy watched in wonder, Qui-Gon reached behind his neck, underneath the great fall of hair, and cut loose a strand of his long, dark brown hair.

"Sometimes this is done as part of the vow ritual," Qui-Gon murmured. He laid the strand over his thigh, then reached to undo Obi-Wan's braid. "But I like doing this privately. Actually, this is the first time I've done this."

"Really?" Obi-Wan asked, amazed. "Why?"

Qui-Gon shrugged as he separated out the three strands of Obi-Wan's braid. "My hair wasn't long enough to do this with my first padawan, as I was too recently Knighted... and I'd suspected Xanatos would think it silly. So I never mentioned it to him." His voice was soft, relaxed. "Thank you for this honor, Obi-Wan."

"The honor is mine, Master," Obi-Wan breathed, trying not to fidget.

The Jedi Master began by laying his strand of hair along one of Obi-Wan's three to be braided, close to his head. Then he began the braid, folding each of the three strands over the others in turn. When the braid reached the boy's chin, Qui-Gon slipped a yellow bead into two strands to work it into the pattern.

"What's that for?" Obi-Wan asked curiously, feeling it with his fingers.

Qui-Gon met the boy's eyes briefly, then glanced back down at the braid, his fingers stilled. "I should have asked you. This is a vow bead. Yoda wove it into my own padawan braid when I made my vows to him. Would you like to wear it, Padawan?"

Obi-Wan felt a flush of pride. "Yes, Master, very much!"

Smiling, Qui-Gon finished the braid with the yellow bead in the middle. With the longer strand, the braid trailed down to just past the boy's collarbone. "There, now *that's* a proper padawan braid!" He grinned at Obi-Wan as he stood up.

The youth touched his braid in awe, then went into his room to look at it in the mirror. His braid before was just a short brushy thing that barely touched his shoulder, but now this - he liked the interweaving of the dark hairs with his much lighter brown hair. And the vow bead... "Thank you, Master," he murmured, returning to the common room.

Qui-Gon replied, "You're welcome, Padawan. Shall we go?" He gestured toward the door.

Obi-Wan settled his robe around his shoulders. "Yes, Master." He felt a note of pride that his master hadn't asked him if he could walk. [I'll make it all the way this time...]

He made it three-fourths of the way to the Temple gardens. Turning a corner, he reached to grab his master's dark brown sleeve before he fell, fighting a wave of dizziness again. Immediately Qui-Gon halted, his arm around him to support him. "We'll rest here, Padawan," he murmured as Obi-Wan sagged gratefully against him. "You'll make it."

"Thank you, Master," Obi-Wan whispered, taking a deep breath to clear his senses. "I...I'm all right."

"Your body is resisting activity because it's working on healing," Qui-Gon explained quietly. "When our Master-Padawan bond becomes more developed, we'll be able to share energy. If I'm weakened, you'll strengthen me, and when you're weak, I'll do the same for you. As yet, we do not have the balance to do that."

"Balance?" the youth asked, disappointed.

"I can speak to your mind, Obi-Wan," the Jedi Master continued, "Or send an emotion through our link. That is all. Our mental energies are not yet aligned well enough to do more. That is one of the things we will need to work on."

"Alignment? You mean like lightsaber crystals, Master?"

Qui-Gon smiled. "Yes, Padawan. Very much so."

Obi-Wan took a few more deep breaths, then straightened. "I think I can continue now," he said with a smile.

Waiting for them in the Thon Meditation Garden were five of Obi-Wan's friends, Master Yoda, Master Depa Billaba of the Council, and a couple other Masters that Obi-Wan didn't know, but surmised were friends of Qui-Gon. His master introduced him to them with the widest, most comfortable grin he'd seen on his master's usually solemn visage yet.

"Obi-Wan, this is Master Raen Gi," Qui-Gon said, indicating a slim woman with long black hair tied back away from her face with an intricate fall of tails and braids. "Raen, my apprentice, Obi-Wan Kenobi."

The woman smiled warmly at the boy. "SO pleased to meet you at last, Obi-Wan," she said in a light, musical voice.

A look that puzzled the youth passed between the two masters, then Qui-Gon was moving on to the other master waiting patiently. "And this is Master Jil-Ba Rendovar. He and Master Gi have been, ah, good friends of mine for years."

The man who also had long, sandy-brown hair tied back much like Qui-Gon's and bright blue eyes in a tanned, weathered face, grinned at the padawan. "Qui-Gon needs looking after, Obi-Wan. Think you can handle the job?"

Obi-Wan grinned back, liking the man already. "I think I can handle it, Master Rendovar."

"We're sorry to hear about Melida/Daan," Master Gi spoke up, touching his arm with compassion. "I hope you can be the stronger for what you've had to endure there."

Obi-Wan felt the soothing comfort of his master's touch in his mind. "Thank you, Master Gi," he responded gravely. "I believe it has taught me a great deal. Especially about myself."

His friends pulled him away just as the two master friends pulled Qui-Gon aside to talk to him briefly. "Qui," Raen Gi whispered, her expression serious, "are you sure about this one? You've had a nasty start with him. There are plenty of others..."

"Rae," Qui-Gon said firmly, slipping an arm around her. "This is definitely the one, which is why we're going to such pains to start over like this." Then his expression softened as he looked down at her. "Obviously Yoda hasn't talked to you. Obi-Wan... is special."

"We will not let you do to yourself what you did the last time, Qui-Gon," Jil-Ba said, his hand on Qui-Gon's arm. "This one is arrogant, too..."

"He's learning..." Qui-Gon blew his breath out in exasperation. "I think he's learned his lesson, Jil. Already I've seen a change in him since I've opened up to him. We'll be fine."

"We love you, Qui," Raen murmured, still worried. "We know how fragile your heart is... and Yoda knows. The boy does not."

A few meters away, Bant was speaking quietly to Obi-Wan, who was curious about the other masters. "Obi, what's wrong?"

"I didn't realize Masters Gi and Rendovar were friends with Qui-Gon, is all," Obi-Wan murmured, glancing over to where the masters in question were discussing something grave with Qui-Gon, from the look on their faces. "I mean, close friends."

"Why shouldn't he have friends?" Garen asked, puzzled.

"I always thought he was such a loner..." Obi-Wan shrugged. "It doesn't matter. But at least that's something more we have in common. When we're on missions, I'll be missing my friends..." and he winked at Bant, "and he'll be missing his. Maybe I can be a friend to him."

Finally the two groups turned back to the waiting Council members. "Qui-Gon," Master Billaba spoke up, "Master Yoda has asked me to deliver the instruction for Master and Padawan, as part of your ritual. Is that all right?"

The party moved into the garden proper, where a couple rows of low benches had been arranged in a clearing, and two cushions placed on the ground. "We are honored, Master Billaba," Qui-Gon replied, bowing to the deeply spiritual Council Member. Gesturing to his padawan, he knelt on one of the cushions, then settled back on his heels. Obi-Wan did the same, facing his master on the opposite cushion.

The others sat on the benches, although Master Yoda took up a position behind Qui-Gon, ostentiably as his former master. Master Billaba stood on the far side of the pair, her arms folded in her robe sleeves as she prepared to address them.

The garden grew hushed, as a moment of centering allowed Master and Padawan to prepare themselves mentally to hear the "instruction". Then Master Billaba made a graceful gesture, indicating she would speak. "A Jedi Master," she began in her low, rich voice, "has tremendous responsibilities upon his shoulders. Because he has raised one of our own to Knighthood, he must continue thereon to embody the Jedi Code for the Order, the citizens of the Republic with whom he may come into contact, and especially any who may come to be his Padawan Learner. A Jedi Master, to maintain his level of communion with the Force, must have the highest commitment and devotion to the Light."

Obi-Wan looked at his master as the Council member spoke. Qui-Gon had given him an encouraging smile as he'd knelt, but now his eyes had drifted closed in order to absorb the words. Never had he seen such serenity... and it gave the youth serious pause to note how this man, this Jedi Master, for all that he'd been through, including this most recent heartache caused by yet another padawan, could achieve such peace of heart. It was humbling for Obi-Wan, seeing how very far he had to go. And more than anything else now, he wanted to go there at this man's side.

"Taking on a Padawan Learner is one of the most important functions of a Master... and potentially the most fulfilling," Depa Billaba was continuing. "To take a young mind, body, and soul and create a Jedi Knight... is our finest achievement, as great as negotiating peace between two peoples. A Knight or Master must become many things to his Padawan Learner. At first, he is father and teacher to the child; later as the Padawan matures, he may be friend, brother, partner, or more. Whatever he is to the Padawan, he must ensure that they create the mind-communion between them that is critical both for the Padawan's safety, and his training. Without it, the Padawan cannot become a Jedi Knight, cannot truly learn to blend himself with the Force as his ally. The Master guides the development of that bond.

"The Jedi Master also must serve as guardian of the Padawan Learner until he is an adult, and protector until his student's skills become sufficiently advanced. While away from the Temple, the Master is the Padawan's only family and link to the Order. They must develop a personal commitment to one another, as well as a joint commitment to the Padawan's training. This can only take place when both develop the proper respect for and trust in the other."

Qui-Gon opened his eyes to see his apprentice watching him avidly. [I have been in the field too long,] he thought, looking over the child's youthful features. [I have been too focused on our missions. This one wants to function as a Knight NOW, but he must not, must hold back and concentrate on learning. How I have failed him - failed to make that personal connection. Such a bright promise in this boy! But more than that - there is an ache in this one for that connection, to belong. I saw it in him when he was trying to get my attention to get me to choose him, both here and on Bandomeer. And I saw it again on Melida/Daan when he ached to give himself to the cause of the Young. I must... or lose him again... I must take him into my heart, hold him close. Obi-Wan Kenobi will belong, be connected... to me.]

Depa had paused before taking up the instruction for the padawan. She observed as the pair gazed at one another. [Dear Qui-Gon,] she thought to herself, almost smiling. [He loves too hard, this one. No one breathes the Living Force as he does... so his heart is vulnerable. Yet he has done so much, given so much. Xanatos was a terrible tragedy. If Qui-Gon weren't so stubborn... hopefully he can keep his balance with this one, although the betrayal was a brutal shock for him. Is this a mistake? Yoda believes in them, so...]

She began the second part of the instructions. "A Padawan Learner also has a great responsibility, and not just to his own training, though that becomes his primary goal. His primary commitment, however, is to the Order and his Master. As he obeys and serves his Master, so he bonds himself to the entire Order. It is the duty of the Padawan to obey his Master without question, to give him his respect and trust. His training will be fulfilled only under those circumstances. A Padawan who cannot respect his teacher is not worthy of being a Jedi."

Obi-Wan shifted position minutely, uncomfortable with the words. [What if the Master is not worthy of the respect?] he wondered, then realized that no one unworthy of a Padawan's respect would be allowed to take an apprentice in the first place. [Qui-Gon was always worthy of my respect,] he mused, disheartened. [I just did not give it.]

"Obedience is therefore a Padawan Learner's first vow," Master Billaba was saying. "He must yield himself to the will of the Force, and the primary voice of that will is his Master's. A Padawan must accept his Master every bit as much as the Master accepts him, for he is to be son, student, and eventually brother, friend, partner... or more... to his Master."

[More, what is this 'more' stuff?] Obi-Wan wondered, then sighed. Something else he wasn't old enough to know about. [Partner, brother... oh, yes, if I could be that some day to him...]

Obi-Wan had to admire Qui-Gon Jinn. Who could not? Qui-Gon was an excellent negotiator and diplomat, a peaceful man though a skilled and effective warrior, and his commitment to the Order was complete. Moreover, his connection to the Force was truly awe-inspiring. [To serve beside this man... I am indeed lucky, and completely stupid for not trusting him on Melida/Daan.]

"In accepting his Master, a Padawan Learner takes on responsibilities that he did not have as a student in the Jedi Temple. Any Jedi who enters into any sort of partnership with another Jedi must accept these responsibilities, but they are a special privilege for a Padawan Learner. He must help his Master wherever he can, whether it is taking over domestic tasks so that the Master may have more time to concentrate on a mission or on needed meditation, or assisting the Master in his work as the Master requires, or backing his Master up in times of danger. This partnership functions best when Master and Padawan can achieve a personal and mental bond between them. This is the Jedi 'training bond', which will draw them into a beautiful harmony that is needed to mold the Padawan into a Jedi Knight."

Master Depa Billaba smiled then, and raised her hands over them as she gazed out at the witnesses. "Master Qui-Gon Jinn and Padawan Obi-Wan Kenobi have chosen each other. They desire to make their vows to one another in this public way so that you, their loved ones, may assist and support them where you can. Let Master and Padawan bond together in this beautiful task, the creation of a Jedi Knight."

She bowed, then, and stood back, while Yoda came to stand in her spot, leaning on his stick. "Stand for this, you will," Yoda murmured. "Put hands together, then make your vows you will."

Qui-Gon rose to his full height and held up his large hands, palms out. More slowly, Obi-Wan got up from the cushion, straightened, and raised his hands as well, laying his palms lightly against those of his master. Their eyes met, deep blue pools of calm to light blue pools of hope.

The Jedi Master began, his deep voice imbued with warmth. "I, Qui-Gon Jinn, Jedi Master, take you, Obi-Wan Kenobi, as my Padawan Learner. I vow to guide you and to protect you. I vow to teach you the ways of the Code and the Force, until you become a Jedi Knight." He paused briefly. [It isn't enough.] Then he continued, holding Obi-Wan's gaze. "As your Master, I give you my trust, my respect, my support... and my heart. May the Force be with us both."

A tear spilled from Obi-Wan's eye, of which he was completely unaware. He had not expected Qui-Gon to say the last, and it shook him to the core. Could he ever forgive himself for betraying that trust? And to have that trust given back to him... [Oh, Force,] he thought quickly, knowing he was expected to speak his vows now. [What can I possibly give him in return? I have nothing, and he has no reason to trust that I will keep my vows this time...]

Then he felt the Force blow through him like a powerful wind, and Obi-Wan yielded to it, feeling a sudden, strong conviction. Gracefully, he lowered his hand and went to one knee before his master. There were murmurs of surprise from the watchers, but Obi-Wan did not hear them. He reached as Qui-Gon did, taking his master's hand in both of his. "I, Obi-Wan Kenobi, Jedi Padawan," the boy began, his voice only shaking minutely from the pulse of strong emotions within him, "take you, Qui-Gon Jinn, as my Master. I vow obedience to you, and I vow my commitment to you as my teacher and my dedication to my training. I will learn the ways of the Code and the Force from your hand and by your side, until I am Knighted." He paused, still holding onto Qui-Gon's hand, but now he laid his other one over his heart. "As your Padawan Learner, I give you my trust, my respect, my support... and my heart. May the Force be with us both."

"Rise, Padawan," Qui-Gon whispered, awed that this headstrong and willful boy should kneel to him. It underscored that Obi-Wan truly repented for his actions on Melida/Daan, and sincerely desired to put that behind them. Relief spread through the Master, and he vowed to himself again to do his part to make their Master-Padawan relationship succeed. He smiled at Obi-Wan then, the triumph and hope he felt showing in his eyes. As the boy stood, Qui-Gon kept Obi-Wan's hand in his as they faced the two Council members.

"So be it," Master Yoda intoned, looking as pleased as they'd ever seen him. "May the Force give you both strength, and keep you close."

Obi-Wan smiled, bowing with his Master to the two Council members. Then he glanced back up at Qui-Gon, who turned back to him in the same moment. To his shock and delight, his master drew something out of his robe and handed it to him.

Obi-Wan's lightsaber. "This is still yours, Padawan."

The boy took it and put it on his belt, unable to keep back a grin. "Thank you, Master."

[My Padawan, welcome home,] Qui-Gon whispered into the boy's mind and opened his arms to him.

Wordlessly, his eyes shining, Obi-Wan went into his master's embrace, hugging him hard.

By the next morning, Padawan Obi-Wan Kenobi realized that he still had a long way to go just in getting to know his enigmatic Master. While Qui-Gon was several degrees warmer toward him personally, he was still something of a mystery. Obi-Wan was curious about his master's relationship with Masters Rendovar and Gi, but he did not want to pry into Qui-Gon's personal life. Also, it seemed that he would continue to say odd little things that Obi-Wan could not figure out at all.

It would seem he was also going to prove to be a strict taskmaster, as the padawan learned upon sitting down with his master that morning to discuss his training schedule for the month. The flurry of missions they'd started out with had interrupted Obi-Wan's studies, and Qui-Gon was evidently bent on getting those back on track, for he heaped on the reading material for his padawan to go through. With the exception for the Jedi philosophy course that Obi-Wan was required to repeat, he had no classes to go to, realizing with amazement that he would only follow the course of study his master had laid out... and be tested personally by his master on all of it.

Though he was still subject to momentary bouts of dizziness, Obi-Wan was directed to walk in the gardens for exercise, as well as join his master for short periods in one of the practice rooms in their tower. The boy was already in complete awe of his master's physical skills, even without a lightsaber, marveling how the large man moved with such economy of movement and grace. It was one of the first things he'd learned about Qui-Gon Jinn. Next to him, Obi-Wan felt like a Talosian yark, an aquatic bird with legs that did not fit its streamlined body, walking awkwardly on land.

The following night after the night of their vows found them settled into a mutual silence as Qui-Gon worked on something on his datapad at the table, and Obi-Wan lay sprawled on the floor reading one of his assignments. [So, this is how it's going to be,] the boy wondered idly, glancing over at his master. [Exercise, study, meditate... when not on mission, that's the life of a Jedi, I guess...]

The Jedi Master sighed audibly, then shifted position as he closed down his datapad. Obi-Wan looked away hastily, but his master was now looking his way. "Padawan, I think you might benefit from a break, correct?" He smiled, glancing meaningfully at the boy's datapad.

"Yes, sir," Obi-Wan replied with relief, sitting up. He'd been studying for a good two hours past nightmeal, he realized. It had been a very long day, for it felt like his first day as a Padawan. "I'm not sleepy, Master, but if you think it's time to go to bed..."

Qui-Gon chuckled. "No, actually I don't. I meant that it's time to do something else. Like work on our bond."

"Oh!" Obi-Wan straightened in surprise, a rush of excitement going through him. "Yes, Master, I'd like that!"

Qui-Gon waved at Obi-Wan to remain where he was, and to the boy's amazement, his very tall master sat on the floor with him, folding his long legs beneath him. Together they cleared the study materials to the side.

Their eyes met; the Jedi Master smiled warmly while his padawan's smile was rather more shy. "I'd like to make this a regular practice for our evenings, Obi-Wan," Qui-Gon began, folding his arms in the long sleeves of his robe. "This, after all, is the chief reason why we're stuck here for a month."

Obi-Wan grinned. "Yes, Master!"

"Now, if you are comfortable, we can proceed." Qui-Gon said, closing his eyes.

"Um..."

The Master opened his eyes again. "Yes, Padawan?"

Obi-Wan wrinkled his nose. "Don't we have to be touching or something? You know, like holding hands?"

Qui-Gon smiled, amused. "Not that I know of, at least not until we know we need it. Sometimes a physical connection will aid the process, but we cannot know that already. I will let you know."

"Yes, Master," the boy replied, a bit disappointed. He closed his eyes and tried to calm, settle into meditative trance.

"Not like that, Padawan," Qui-Gon murmured quietly. "No trance. Just relax."

Obi-Wan took a deep breath, trying to relax.

"Let yourself feel the Force flowing through you first," Qui-Gon continued, his voice dropped to a soft whisper. "Then focus on the bond we already have, the bond which connected us before I ever accepted you as Padawan."

The Force blew gently through the boy's being, and he smiled a little to feel its comforting weight around him, in his mind. He stayed there a couple minutes, then looked for the mental connection that existed between his mind and that of Qui-Gon Jinn. It had changed since the last time he'd truly looked at it, he was relieved to note. The existing tendrils of connection had strengthened, and a few more that had unraveled showed signs of knitting back together. They were very close to what they'd had before Melida/Daan.

[Can you hear me, Obi-Wan?] the Jedi Master said from within the boy's mind.

"Yes, Master," Obi-Wan breathed softly. He liked the sensation. It was warm and comforting, like a soft, downy blanket.

[Focus on our bond, Obi-Wan. See if you can touch it.]

For a minute, the boy tried to do just that. But it seemed to slide away each time, as if it was something slippery. "I cannot, Master."

[Again. Take your time, Padawan. Slowly.]

But it still slipped away from him. "Master, will they send me away if this doesn't work?" he asked uncertainly.

The eyes of the Master flew open. "Obi-Wan... why are you worried about being sent away? The Council..."

"They're evaluating me at the end of the month," Obi-Wan persisted worriedly. "If we cannot achieve the proper Master-Padawan bond, they'll send me away."

Qui-Gon leaned over to hold the boy by the arms, looking him intently in the eye. "Padawan, that will NOT happen... do you doubt yourself so much? Do you doubt *me*?"

The boy's blue eyes were wide. "Oh, no, Master Qui-Gon, I don't doubt *you*, never that! It's me - I cannot even touch our bond..."

"Padawan, we have only just STARTED this process," Qui-Gon countered, trying to keep the exasperation out of his voice. "You do not have immediate success so you are ready to give up? If that is how you feel, Obi-Wan Kenobi, we have a long, arduous journey ahead of us. But I'm afraid that *you* are going nowhere, especially out of this Order."

Obi-Wan was abashed. "No, Master, I don't want to give up... I'm NOT giving up, but... cannot the Council still send me away? If I don't pass those evaluations..."

"Then we will see that you do not fail," Qui-Gon said firmly, releasing him and sitting back. "You are going to have to trust me... but most importantly, trust yourself. I am asking of you nothing that you cannot do, believe me."

"Y...yes, Master." To himself, he thought, [Great, Kenobi, one day after you make your vows to him AGAIN, and already you're screwing up.]

Qui-Gon, still concerned, leaned forward again and grasped the boy's chin gently in his hand, bidding him to look up at him again. "You will not fail, Padawan," he said quietly, looking into the boy's eyes. "Believe in yourself. Believe in *us*." To himself, the Master thought, [He was so full of confidence before Melida/Daan... although I cannot miss the cockiness, I want his confidence back...]

Obi-Wan gazed into his master's eyes, reading his care and concern, and began to relax. [He does care about me... and he's right.] "I will, Master," he replied, his voice a little stronger.

"You're not afraid of hard work, are you?" Qui-Gon released his chin and eased back, giving him a smile again.

"No, Master," Obi-Wan answered. "I like to work hard. This mental stuff... is just so different."

"Ah, you're used to everything coming to you easily, aren't you?" Qui-Gon said, nodding with a smile. "You're very intelligent, my Padawan, and a swift learner. But they do not teach many mental skills in the Temple to the younger students. Yet you are strong in the Force, and are already advanced in some areas. Have patience." He patted his student's shoulder in reassurance. "It will come, Obi-Wan. And then you will blaze through the rest like lightning."

His master's frank praise and assessment of his abilities embarrassed Obi-Wan, who ducked his head, blushing. "Master, I..." He gulped, his throat tightening. "Master, I will try again. I *will* do this."

"That's my Obi-Wan," Qui-Gon smiled, relaxing. "Now, we'll try again, all right?"

Obi-Wan sighed, but he felt better. "Yes, Master."

On the second try, it did not go much better.

"Perhaps a physical connection would help after all, Padawan?" Qui-Gon asked his apprentice gently as they opened their eyes again.

Obi-Wan was disheartened, but was growing more determined. "Yes, Master, I would like that," he replied firmly.

Smiling, Qui-Gon opened his arms to him, but the boy was as yet unsure. "I'm not a baby to be held," Obi-Wan muttered.

"Very well," Qui-Gon said, folding his arms again and leaning back, closing his eyes yet again.

[Oh, Sithhell,] Obi-Wan thought, scolding himself. [You need this, Kenobi. Get over it.] "On the other hand..." he said aloud, laying his hand on Qui-Gon's arm. "Please tell me one never gets too old to be held..."

Qui-Gon chuckled as he made room for the boy to sit before him. "One never gets too old to be held, Padawan, true. Even Jedi Masters need it. Simple comforts like this are very healing, and we both have had much from which to be healed."

"Yes," Obi-Wan murmured. He sat down before him, sideways, drawing his knees up to his chest, and allowed himself to be caged by the older man's body, Qui-Gon circling him with long arms and legs. Sighing, Obi-Wan leaned over into the solidity of his master's chest. Qui-Gon drew him close, laying a broad hand against the side of his head to hold him against his heart. Immediately the padawan felt calmer, more centered. [Amazing...]

[Now, Padawan mine,] Qui-Gon whispered quietly into his thoughts, [Again...]

It was as if a barrier that had been there was suddenly melted away. Shy but thrilled, Obi-Wan easily touched their mental bond. "I...I did it..."

Enjoying the sweet relief of their breakthrough, Qui-Gon hugged his padawan, smiling. [Indeed, Padawan, you certainly did... now, try this with me...] Mentally he showed his apprentice the next step. [Touch with me... here...]

As Obi-Wan internally watched in wonder, the broken tendril of bond that they touched seemed to come together and reconnect. "Oh!" Astonished, Obi-Wan turned against Qui-Gon and slipped his arms around to his master's back underneath the robe in order to hug him. "Oh, Master..." he murmured into the hard chest.

[Yes, my Obi-Wan,] Qui-Gon replied, holding his padawan just as tightly... his eyes just as moist.

For thirty nights Master and Padawan attended to their task, always huddled together on the floor in the close contact the task seemed to require. Their bond was made anew, strengthened, and allowed to grow. Obi-Wan learned to lower his personal shields for his master, and to gain full control over them so that he could relax or stiffen them at need. Eventually, around the third week, Obi-Wan was finally able to mentally speak to his master, and both knew great joy in developing this intimate communication together.

Outside of what they now called "bond-time", Obi-Wan studied hard, meditated easily, and regained his physical strength and agility. As their bond strengthened, he and Master Qui-Gon began to work on several new exercise forms, what Jedi called "jemna", which they would do in tandem, allowing their new mental unity to manifest itself in a physical way. The jemna involved intricate movements with or without lightsabers that could not be performed with anyone other than one's Master or Padawan, or at least with whom one was mentally intimate.

The shadows of Melida/Daan diminished for them both, though neither wanted to forget the hard-won lessons learned on that mission. For Obi-Wan, his fears of rejection and isolation faded as his bond with his Master grew. For Qui-Gon, the fact that working with Obi-Wan on the bond, his studies, and the jemna routines felt so qualitatively different from anything he'd ever experienced with Xanatos began to set his own fears of betrayal aside, and heal the wound that had been reopened when Obi-Wan had left him. The trust between them grew day by day.

On the thirty-first day, Master Yoda called them to the Council chamber anteroom to meet with him and two other of the Jedi High Council, Masters Billaba and Poof. Master and Padawan strode in and smoothly bowed together before the other masters.

"My master," Qui-Gon murmured, acknowledging his own former master. "Master Billaba, Master Poof... my padawan learner and myself present ourselves for evaluation."

Yoda looked keenly at his former apprentice. "Master Jinn, satisfied with your apprentice's progress are you?"

Relaxed, Qui-Gon smiled and felt Obi-Wan's relief beside him. "Yes, my Master. I am indeed satisfied with *our* progress. I invite you to examine our bond."

"Hmmmm, yes..." The tiny, ancient master regarded them thoughtfully. He continued in the silence to Qui-Gon alone. [Needed the physical connection, he has, yes?]

[Yes, Master,] Qui-Gon replied. [As you foresaw. He is proving to be a remarkable mental adept.]

[Close you have become, hmmm?]

[Yes, my Master.]

[I sense uncertainty in you, Qui-Gon...]

[Not in the boy. Why are there two other masters present?]

Yoda made a sound like a snort, causing Obi-Wan to wonder mightily what he and Master Qui-Gon were evidently discussing in private. [Biased, they believe me to be.] Yoda replied. [They only wish to witness the jemna.]

[Oh, is that all?] Qui-Gon smiled at his former master. [Curious, are they?]

Yoda snorted again, and gestured at Obi-Wan with his stick. "What say you, young Kenobi?"

Obi-Wan straightened abruptly. In his mind he could feel his master's reassurance, which put him at ease. "Master Yoda, I feel confident and I'm happy with what Master Qui-Gon and I have accomplished this past month. I thank the Council for the opportunity."

"About Master Qui-Gon - how do you feel?"

They turned to one another, and Obi-Wan glanced up at his Master in wonder. "He's my Master..." Obi-Wan began uncertainly.

"Not what he is, how do you feel, Padawan?"

"Yes, sir..." Obi-Wan met Qui-Gon's serene gaze. "I'm very proud to be Master Qui-Gon's Padawan, Master Yoda. He's... he's been very good to me... and I like him." He smiled shyly. "I think we're good for each other."

"And I cannot ask for a better Padawan," Qui-Gon murmured warmly, smiling as well. "Obi-Wan has been a devoted student and companion. He excels at his studies, and once he regained his strength, has worked hard on the jemna, showing remarkable capability for his age."

Obi-Wan glowed under his master's praise, feeling a surge of rightness and belonging within him. [I belong with him, I am Jedi now and always,] he thought to himself happily, wanting to dance and shout all at once.

"Master Qui-Gon," a soft voice interrupted. They turned to look over at Master Billaba who had spoken. "The final part of your evaluation requires that you and your Padawan perform the Shia-Ghree jemna."

"Shia-Ghree" meant simply "two birds" in an ancient language called Arkanian. It was, according to Jedi legend, a lightsaber form developed by a Master Arca for two of his students who were very close brothers - Ulic and Cay Qel-Droma, the former of which had once been lost to the Dark Side but returned to the Light shortly before his death. That part of the history was unimportant; what was important was that the jemna depended on a bond between the two participants. If the mental connection between the two was not sufficiently developed, they would be in grave danger of injuring one another.

Expecting this, Qui-Gon had taught the Shia-Ghree to Obi-Wan as one of several jemnas that could potentially have been requested as part of their evaluation. Only in the past week did they try it with lightsabers, after determining that their Master-Padawan bond was where it needed to be.

Qui-Gon bowed to the Council masters, then removed his long robe, Obi-Wan doing the same. They laid their robes aside and moved to the center of the room. This chamber, while not as cavernous as the Council chamber itself, nevertheless had just enough room in the middle for such a demonstration.

Together Master and Padawan removed their lightsabers from their belts and activated them after dialing the blade intensity down to training levels. They stepped nearer into the opening position, close enough that they could hear each other's breathing, the blue and green glow of the saberlight garish on their faces. Qui-Gon looked down into his apprentice's face, centering on their bond through the Force. Obi-Wan looked up at his tall Master, letting their bond flow strong with the Force.

Then they began. The Shia-Ghree was swift and deadly, for the two had to move without separating by as much as a foot. In their case, the height differences had had to be compensated for; Qui-Gon, as they'd expected, had developed a variation to suit them, also adjusted for Obi-Wan's level of expertise with the lightsaber. The blue blade and the green blade flew rapidly around each other in a dance of light, never touching, humming loudly but never making the crackle of discordant energies intersecting.

On the other hand, while their saber blades did not touch, they most emphatically did, each using the other effectively as an extension of their body. In a sense, the jemna forced them to become a single physical entity with two lightsabers! And interestingly enough, their height differences actually had been made to work to their advantage, as Qui-Gon could well reach above his padawan, and Obi-Wan could move quicker, reaching around his master below.

Yoda's bulbous green eyes widened, studying the bond between Master and Padawan as they wove their jemna. What he had foreseen was coming true - these two, together, had the potential for great and good power, a team of Jedi Knights that could, Force willing, blaze brightly across the galaxy, champions for peace and justice indeed. They'd managed, despite the terrible start they'd made together, to forge a solid foundation for the future, learning from their mistakes and building a relationship between them to last.

When they finished, they stood with backs together and touching, lightsabers held together over the taller Jedi's shoulder, blades less than an inch apart. They held the position for a moment, then rose together to face the Council members, powering their weapons off. Solemnly they bowed.

"Passed this evaluation, have you," Yoda murmured... a bit smugly, the other masters noted. "Ready to return to the field, you are."

Qui-Gon, flushed with their success, grinned as he bowed again. "Thank you, my Master!"

"Thank you, Master Yoda!" Obi-Wan added from beside him, beaming and still bouncing with energy.

[Our Qui-Gon's back,] Depa Billaba thought privately to the other two Council members with relief.

The following morning, awaiting their transport at the Jedi spaceport, Master and Padawan stood together watching the swarming air traffic overhead, the coming day casting gold and pink glows over buildings and vehicles. "This mission should prove a challenge, Padawan," Qui-Gon murmured, glancing down at his young apprentice, who also stood with arms folded in robe sleeves, as serene as he himself felt.

"Yes, Master," Obi-Wan replied, calm though he felt the underlying happiness still.

"Excited?" Qui-Gon smiled, watching him. He touched their bond; his padawan touched it and him mentally as well, a kind of mental hug they could now enjoy. Their mind-communion fairly sang between them.

[No, well, yes, Master," Obi-Wan continued in his mind. [I'm excited to be going on a mission again, but I know the mission will be tricky.] He glanced up, grinning. [I think they only send you on the tricky ones.]

[I fear that may be true, Padawan,] Qui-Gon answered in the same manner. [That will only benefit your training, of course.]

Their eyes met; joy and peace went between their lightly linked minds. [We're finally ready now, Master,] Obi-Wan said, sobering. [Ready for each other... ready to be a team. We need this.]

Qui-Gon let out a long breath, relaxing. He trusted Obi-Wan completely now; he knew the boy trusted him. They had repaired what had been lost, built what had not yet been built. Obi-Wan was young and certainly had a long way to go in his Jedi training, but the Master-Padawan bond that had to be there for that to happen... was emphatically there now.

Now... they were on their way. [Yes, Padawan, we need this,] Qui-Gon returned to his apprentice, looking out again over the glimmering Coruscant sunrise.

The End