Master Apprentice Archive Obi-Wan's Magical Mystery Cure Quick search:

Summary: Qui-Gon isn't feeling well, so Obi-Wan resolves to make him better. Whether Qui-Gon likes it or not.

Humour/Parody, Hurt/Comfort, Plot-What-Plot

Rated... R. For sex and for health reasons.

I only warn for violence and/or sexual abuse and/or under-18 participants. This contains none of that. I will say it contains some stuff that make people in chat go "ewwww!"

This isn't exactly Dostoevsky, but I love feedback. It isn't exactly Lucasfilm, either. My apologies to George.

Thanks to Fox, who insisted that I write her a story and then whined until it went further; Sheltie, who ran screaming; Kimdy, who lapped it all up; lion, who provided the squirrel and everyone else who passed through #bic that day. Biggest thanks to Master Ruth, for prodding the lumps and stroking the rest.

Obi-Wan knocked gently on the door. "Qui-Gon? Are you well?" He waited, but there was no response, the sound of shuffling, moving cloth. "Qui-Gon? If you don't answer, I'm coming in." Obi-Wan tried the lock.

"Padawan, if you open that door, I'm going to resign as your master." The voice was hoarse, cracked slightly with pain.

That did it for Obi-Wan. He shoved the door open, and pushed into the toilet-cubicle.

And paused, eyes watering at the smell. Qui-Gon had obviously been in here a while.

Qui-Gon was huddled miserably on the toilet, hair messed, trousers around his ankles, too weary to muster a decent glare. He shook his head. "I'd really just rather be alone."

"Nonsense," Obi-Wan replied, trying not to inhale in case he cracked his cheerful facade. He moved closer, to feel Qui-Gon's forehead, burning. "Are you throwing up, as well?"

A reluctant grunt, that Obi-Wan took as an affirmative.

"You should have called me sooner." He tapped an admonishing finger on Qui-Gon's nose. "Get yourself cleaned up. I'll prepare something - I know a recipe that will take care of this."

Qui-Gon's eyes widened, sudden animation as he shook his head, quickly, and then clutched it and winced. "No, Obi-Wan, I'll be fine, I don't need one of your cures-"

"Nonsense. I'm just going to pop down to stores, and see if they've got the ingredients. They should have biygan moths for the Wookies... I'm not sure about Terkir juice, but I could probably substitute alekrnatbd blood..."

And with that, Obi-Wan wandered out, composing his shopping list.

Qui-Gon moaned, low in his throat, as his stomach cramped worse than before.

By the time Obi-Wan returned, an hour later, Qui-Gon had found the energy to drag himself back to his bed, and curl up in a miserable ball.

Obi-Wan settled beside him, and rubbed his hip, gently. "No better?"

Qui-Gon whimpered.

"I got everything I need, I just need to mix it up and heat it, and then I'll make it all better."

"No..."

"Shh." Obi-Wan leaned over to lay a gentle kiss on Qui-Gon's sweaty neck.

"Please, Obi-Wan, I'll be fine. Don't make me drink anything."

"You're not fine."

"It's not so bad. Just give me a few minutes, and I'll be fine. I don't need your cure."

Obi-Wan sighed. "Stop being such a baby. I'll be back soon, and then we'll get this all over with."

He left Qui-Gon alone on the bed, with nothing to do but clutch his stomach and pity himself, and listen to the ominous rattle of pans from the kitchen.

Qui-Gon struggled to harness all his Jedi healing techniques, to calm the nausea and ease his bowels and release the throbbing of his head, but it didn't really do anything, and he much preferred the idea of curling tighter, and crying.

He sniffled, and then quickly suppressed it. If Obi-Wan caught him mewling, he would be unbearable.

Eventually, Obi-Wan returned, with a bowl of something steaming, his arrival heralded with a stench that made Qui-Gon's stomach attempt to throw itself out both ends. Ever since his healing rotation on Cordus III, Obi-Wan had been fascinated by home remedies, strange concoctions supported by rumour, rather than healers. They were invariably worse than whatever it was they were trying to cure.

And anything worse than what Qui-Gon had right now could only be fatal.

Obi-Wan set the bowl aside, and pushed Qui-Gon about until he was propped up against the pillows, waited while Qui-Gon's stomach rolled like a tower building in high wind.

And then he brought the bowl closer, stirred a spoon through the dark green mass. Oh, worse. It wasn't even a drink that Qui-Gon could toss down quickly. Why Obi-Wan couldn't have picked up a few more of his home cures on planets filled with sugar and honey, Qui-Gon wasn't sure.

Obi-Wan dipped the spoon in once more, took a generous pile of the... sludge, and offered it up. "Taste it, master; it's not so bad."

"Obi-Wan, it's moving."

"It's supposed to."

A closer look at the writhing spoon, and Qui-Gon shrank back, begged with his eyes. "Obi-Wan, please don't make me eat anything that's moving."

Obi-Wan shoved the spoon closer, impatient. "They're grub worms. You have to eat them before they drown."

"But I'm a vegetarian."

"And you know what I think of that. Plants got you into this mess; Ektarian Grub Worms will get you out."

Qui-Gon stared at the rolling green stew, suddenly taken with the similarities to the current feeling in his belly.

He opened his mouth to make another objection, but quick as light, Obi-Wan had moved and Qui-Gon had a mouthful of thick, salty, wiggling green.

His belly surged but Obi-Wan clapped a hand over his mouth, eyebrows raised as though to dare him, and Qui-Gon forced a swallow, and another, and another, until it was all gone but the aftertaste and he was shuddering.

And he was quite sure they were shuddering in his belly.

But Obi-Wan was forcing another spoonful on him, and the actual taste couldn't be worse than the aftertaste, but his mouth was filled again with squirming soup, and there was a particularly big grub in this mouthful, and much as he tried to pretend it was part of the mass he could feel it bumping against his tongue.

He swallowed, desperately, but it twisted about and wouldn't go down, only the liquid and the suspicious smaller lumps, until he couldn't ignore that there was one unmistakable worm in his mouth. Alive.

And wriggling.

He opened his mouth to spit it out, but Obi-Wan bumped up his chin, knocking his jaw shut.

And there was a squish.

and liquid flowed from between his teeth.

and he gagged

and his eyes watered

and he tried to push it back to his throat without touching it with his tongue, desperate to swallow it if only to get it out of his mouth.

He had to swallow, over and over, before he finally felt it sliding slowly down his throat to sit in his chest.

And then he shuddered, with his whole body, even his toes.

"Please, Obi-Wan. No more."

Obi-Wan petted his hair, gently, willing to be sympathetic now that Qui-Gon had accepted his concoction.

"Master, just a few more spoons."

"I can't."

"You can. Look, your mind's off the diarrhea already, isn't it?"

"It's well and truly focused on the desire to throw up."

Obi-Wan smiled, as though Qui-Gon had made some sort of joke, and caught the drips of the next spoonful on the edge of the bowl.

"Close your eyes. Pretend they're tarb beans."

Qui-Gon stared at Obi-Wan.

"Pretend they're especially robust tarb beans."

Qui-Gon shook his head and took the spoon out of Obi-Wan's hand, closed his eyes and began throwing the soup back, dropping it as far back in his throat as he could.

Sooner in, sooner swallowed.

And if it seemed to wriggle on the back of his tongue, it may just have been his imagination.

When he finally paused for breath, Obi-wan was watching approvingly. "See, not so bad, was it?"

Qui-Gon snatched the glass of water from Obi-Wan's hand and poured it down his throat.

Obi-Wan accepted the empty glass, and pushed Qui-Gon to lie down again. "Now, you might have a few unpleasant minutes while it takes effect, but trust me, then it will all be over."

Qui-Gon blanched. "That wasn't the unpleasant part?"

Obi-Wan chuckled. "Don't be such a dramatist. I'll just warm a pillow and get some more blankets."

Minutes after Obi-Wan left - taking the bowl with him, at least - Qui-Gon turned cold.

His stomach turned to ice, and then it spread through his body like a wave, freezing his lungs and his head and his fingers and toes. He began to shake, the tremors making their way out from his belly, where the grubs seemed like tumbling ice cubes.

He moaned, and gasped as cold spiked through his bones, and he was shivering uncontrollably when Obi-Wan hurried back in.

A deliciously warm pillow pressed to his body and he curled around it gratefully, barely noticing the blankets piled around him.

He was frozen and miserable and fuzzy, and Obi-Wan was pushing at his mind with soothing, healing strength, until the fuzziness got bigger, and bigger, and there wasn't so much cold...

Qui-Gon woke, blearily, some time later.

He felt... actually, not so bad.

He ached a little.

but the nausea was gone.

and the stomach cramps were gone.

and his head was fine.

and he had a large, hard, irresistible erection.

"See, master? All over." Obi-Wan inched forward on the bed, settled his hand on the bulge in Qui-Gon's pants. "And now we can get back to business."

"Obi-Wan..." Qui-Gon tried to resist the urge to just press into that hand. He was sweaty, and smelly, and he'd been too sick to care about showering or cleaning his teeth or changing his clothes for days. Enthusiastic as his cock was, the rest of his body wanted to climb into a bath and scrub. "Obi-Wan, I'm disgusting."

"Shh." Obi-Wan pulled at Qui-Gon's damp trousers, then stripped off while Qui-Gon removed his shirt, half-reluctantly.

Naked now, he flicked his golden braid behind his shoulder and buried his face in Qui-Gon's balls and breathed, kissing with gentle lips. "You smell like you."

Lips skirting over his hard cock, pulling gently at the tender skin of his sac, touches of tongue, Obi-Wan's chest swelling as he inhaled, over and over.

And then he took his cock keep in his mouth, his hot wet mouth, and he sucked, hard, tripping nerves with his tongue and pushing Qui-Gon's thighs wider with his hands.

Qui-Gon gasped, clutched at the blankets, wailed, and came.

Obi-Wan drank, moaning his pleasure as Qui-Gon pulsed inside him, swallowing over and over until his mouth gentled, sucking lightly as Qui-Gon softened in his mouth, finally released him with a few last licks.

A warm smile.

"Roll over."

Qui-Gon blinked. "Obi-Wan, I haven't-"

"Roll over."

So he rolled over, and settled into the pillows, waiting for the familiar touch of slick fingers, stopped breathing when he felt a long, wet lick up the crack of his ass.

"Obi-Wan, I haven't-" choked off as Obi-Wan's tongue pushed at his overly-tender entrance.

And if Obi-Wan didn't care, it wasn't Qui-Gon's job to care, so he shut up, or at least stopped talking, and pushed against the caring mouth.

Long, wet caresses, that amazing tongue tickling at his entrance and pressing deep inside and withdrawing to tease once more; Qui-Gon looked back to see Obi-Wan stroking himself as he worked, hand sweeping the length of him and thumb sliding over the glistening head. Qui-Gon could close his eyes and see it, Obi-Wan's thick cock straining to be where he tasted. Endless perfect pleasure, until Qui-Gon felt Obi-Wan crawling up his body, to whisper thickly in his ear. "I'm going to fill you, and then I'm going to taste you again."

And now Qui-Gon felt the slick fingers, a short preparation before Obi-Wan's hard shaft was filling his tender passage, not quite the comfortable fit it usually was but good all the same, and it didn't take terribly long before Obi-Wan was frozen inside him, pulsing inside him, panting his release.

Barely done and he was pushing Qui-Gon forward, to kneel upright with his hands splayed against the wall, and Obi-Wan was on his back, head between Qui-Gon's legs, tongue pushing up to taste himself in Qui-Gon's body, to catch his come as it leaked away, grasping Qui-Gon's buttocks to pull him closer, to manoeuvre him as though Qui-Gon's pleasure was only a side-benefit to Obi-Wan's own, to his need to taste and take.

And Qui-Gon was hard again, harder, perhaps, and it would only take a twist of his hips to push his cock into Obi-Wan's mouth, but that would be stealing something from Obi-Wan, the something that had Obi-Wan devouring him, desperately, needfully.

Qui-Gon wanted to share it, wanted to know, wanted this, finally lost his patience and reached down to grasp Obi-Wan's shoulders, pulling him forward until he could take the taste from Obi-Wan's mouth, Obi-Wan's mouth that was thick with come and something darker, his cheeks wet with saliva, and Obi-Wan kissed back with that same passion, finding more to devour on Qui-Gon's own tongue.

Desperately, teeth and noses bumping, fingers grasping, Qui-Gon wanted more, was pressing Obi-Wan hard to the wall as he took and was taken but it wasn't enough, so he pushed Obi-Wan down flat again, and pushed his heavy cock between those lips and pushed inside, completely controlling as Obi-Wan gagged at the angle but reached for more.

Qui-Gon paused, drew out and purred as Obi-Wan arched his neck to capture the dark head, reaching for the thick sex that was just out of reach.

"You want this, Padawan? Want me to fuck your mouth? Want me to shove inside and come down your throat? Tell me what you want. Tell me why you want it."

"I want to taste you. I want to taste what-" desperate words, as he kept reaching for the elusive cock, "The grubs... weren't... not part of the medicine." He managed to swipe his tongue across the head, making Qui-Gon hiss. "Ektarian grubs make you hard, make your come taste sweet. You taste so good, now, master, want to drink you, want to taste you."

Qui-Gon stopped, hips back, well away from Obi-Wan's mouth.

"You made me eat grubs to make my come taste better."

"So good, master, you don't know, I'll show you how you taste, come in my mouth."

"You made me eat grubs."

Obi-Wan blinked, his desperation wavering under his master's glare. "Yes." A moment, waiting for Qui-Gon to resume. Which he didn't. "For Force's sake, Qui-Gon, it was a few grubs, it's not like you're not enjoying the side effects, so get over it, come closer."

Qui-Gon had a hundred retorts, but none of them would get his cock sucked, which seemed to be more important than any argument right now, so he pushed back into Obi-Wan's mouth, pressing deep to Obi-Wan's throat and taking pleasure as Obi-Wan gagged, slightly, but never stopped.

Obi-Wan worked him like a professional, driving for that final pleasure, moaning like a whore, until Qui-Gon's balls drew high, and he could feel the pleasure gather like electricity, wild sparks, and with that first throb be pulled back, shooting over Obi-Wan's chest and neck, long white threads of come over his peaked red nipples and trailing braid, and pleasure above all in the shocked horror in Obi-Wan's eyes and gaping, empty mouth.

With a cruel smile, Qui-Gon moved back to examine his work, considering for a moment before selecting a thread that ran from Obi-Wan's left nipple, up and over his collar bone to the tender place where neck met jaw.

And slowly, he put his tongue to follow the path, one long, wet lick.

Oh, it did taste good. Sweet, but not overly, an edge of honey.

He ran his tongue around his mouth, trying to store it, to taste it more completely, and Obi-Wan whimpered.

Another thread across Obi-Wan's neck, where he could feel his pulse, tiny licks this time, savouring every inch. And slowly he moved over the rest, drinking himself from Obi-Wan's warm skin, revelling in the shivers of pleasure and moans of distress.

When there was nothing more to taste, Qui-Gon offered Obi-Wan a kiss, a dry brush of lips that tasted of nothing more than what was on his breath.

"I suppose, Padawan, if you want more, you will have to make me come again. And hope that I'm pleased enough to forget where I'm aiming when I do."

~Dr Squidlove smiles sweetly, and points to drsquidlove@virginqueen.com~ Remind me that I should be working on nice fic, with nice sex and emotional exploration. And shut up about the assignments. Semester hasn't started, yet. /g/

More Squidfic can be found at
The Lecherous Tentacles of Dr Squidlove
http://members.iinet.net.au/~tentacles/squidfic.html