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Title: Love of the Jedi
Author: Tally
Summary: Sequel to Shadow of the Jedi. Obi-Wan and Qui-Gon complete the soulbond.
Warnings: This is SLASH.
Category: AU, Romance
Archive: Yes.
Rating: R
Note: Where to start? Firstly this started off as an interlude between my rewrite of TPM (Shadow of the Jedi) and AOTC (Warrior of the Jedi), however I had so much interest in the O/Q relationship that my idea for a brief fic turned into another full-length story. This has become the longest fic I have ever written. Enjoy!
Thanks to Mady, my beta, who put up with me constantly changing and re-writing chapter.
Prologue – Shadows of Phantoms
The battle of Naboo was won, its people, all of its people, were victorious. The Council, drawn by the mystery of the Sith, arrived on the planet to hear from Qui-Gon Jinn and Obi-Wan Kenobi their account of the final battle face to face.
The Jedi talked long of this Dark Warrior who had fought them so viciously, and when the Jedi Warrior spoke, the Council listened. The Sith on Naboo was dead, but his master remained, alive somewhere, plotting his revenge.
"Grave this news is, the Sith among us again. Find the master we must, stop him before more harm he does," Yoda told all those present at the gathering.
"How?" Qui-Gon had asked.
"He will look for a new apprentice." All those present turned to the Jedi Warrior, waiting for him to read the signs he saw in the Force. "A Jedi will fall to his will first and then, and then he will seek the boy, bending him to his will also."
"Anakin must be protected," Qui-Gon finished for him.
"Meditated on this we have. Your apprentice Skywalker will be."
Anakin Skywalker was given into Master Jinn's care to be trained as a Jedi. The boy was ecstatic that his dreams were being fulfilled. However, the Warrior still had his fears. Night came and the city celebrated its victory. Yoda found himself alone in one of the palace's great rooms. He was waiting. He knew he would come.
"Come out of the shadows you can, Obi-Wan. Time I think it is."
"Apologies, Master, old habits." Obi-Wan came out of the darkness and knelt before the older Jedi. "You wanted to see me?"
"Hmph, since when has that made you appear? Come to me because speak to me you wish."
"Yes, Master."
"Just like Qui-Gon you are, stubborn and rebellious when you need not be. Your enemy I am not, Obi-Wan." Yoda rarely sounded angry; even so, when he spoke now his voice contained a hard edge.
"Apologies again, Master Yoda. After keeping myself apart from the Jedi for so long, I am finding it difficult to readjust."
"A reason this is, though not yours. Listen I will, Obi-Wan."
"I am going with Qui-Gon and Anakin. I can no longer be dead."
"Abandon your duties you are?"
"No, I will leave them when I must. But Anakin, the Chosen One, is a sign that war is upon us, Master Yoda. One we must all fight. The best way I can think to protect the Jedi is to protect him."
"Sense something you do." It was not a question.
"The danger I sensed to Qui-Gon has passed in the present, but I can still feel it." His voice has dropped to a whisper. "It is all around me, I can feel it everywhere. Darkness and death are surrounding us, although from where I cannot tell."
"Clouded the future is, see it clearly I cannot. Words of comfort I have not for you. Still one thing I will tell you that I told Mace five years ago. Darkness there may be, young one, shining through a bright light does. A soulbond I can see."
"Yes, I see it too. It is more than a comfort. Will it be enough?"
"What is enough? Do our duty is all that we can do. Trust in the Force, Obi-Wan, led us this far it has."
"I must go, Qui-Gon waits."
"May the Force be with you," Yoda said to the shadows. "Jedi Warrior."
And as easily as that Obi-Wan Kenobi was reborn to the Jedi. A message was posted at the Temple of the return of a colleague thought dead in much the same way his death had been reported five years earlier. By the time he set foot on Coruscant, the news of Obi-Wan's return would be old.
Qui-Gon waited for his old padawan at the ramp of the ship headed home. He knew that it was something that would happen often if he tied himself to the younger man. The Jedi Warrior was never sought out, but instead was the one to seek you. So Qui-Gon waited. And waited.
"This may become a habit," a voice said from behind him.
Qui-Gon turned to see Obi-Wan standing three inches from him. He had not heard him approach the ship, nor felt him within the Force. His only sense of his apprentice had been that he was still on the planet. The Jedi knew that this was how it would be from now on, unless Obi-Wan decided otherwise. Either by allowing him past his shields or by creating a void like the last time they had been here. It was more than any other Jedi would get. And still there was the unspoken bond that lay between them that allowed Qui-Gon this unique connection.
"Are you coming then?"
"Yes. You need me and so does Anakin. But if you agree and I do come, this..." he spread his arms to indicate the ship and its lowered ramp. "The waiting may become a habit. I still have a duty to the others, Qui-Gon. Obi-Wan Kenobi may not be dead anymore, but the Jedi Warrior is still not ready to step out from his shadows."
Qui-Gon did not look pleased, not because of the waiting, but because still Obi-Wan could not live his life.
"Do not be saddened, my Master, it is simply not time. Before, I lived between the living. At least now I have half of a life, with you."
"I'd like nothing more than to have you with me, my Obi-Wan, in any way that is possible, and I think you will come one way or another, whether I agree or not."
They both smiled.
"The Chosen One must be protected, Qui-Gon."
"Yes, and he has us both to do it." He moved up the ramp. "Shall we go?"
Obi-Wan followed Qui-Gon up the ramp as Qui-Gon disappeared into the ship. While the danger was still there, lessoned, it was now a dull throbbing in Obi-Wan's mind. No other Jedi needed him now. He turned back to the ship only to glance over his shoulder again when he felt the weight of another's stare. A figure stood behind one of the high windows of the palace, watching the Jedi ship.
Chancellor Palpatine.
Obi-Wan's own gaze lingered on him a moment before strolling up into the ship's belly. As he went he said to no one,
"I have a bad feeling about this."
Deep within the shadows, a light dwells, one almost indiscernible to those who first glance into the Darkness, but the light is strong, if not fulfilled. It lies waiting, ready for the moment when it will flare to life with the brightness the suns of Tatooine would envy. It lies dormant, not yet recognised by the world or spoken of by those wise enough to have seen it.
Darkness pushes in on the worlds of the galaxy, a named foe threatens the peace of a millennia, a phantom waits to strike. For the Jedi, hope yet remains in the form of a young boy and in a love unspoken.
Time has been allowed for the two men who are joined within the Force, time the galaxy could ill afford, time they needed, and in five years of doubt, that love has grown until the song within the Force, that celebrates the existence of the bond, plays forth within their ears and it can no longer be denied or ignored. It will be realised and the tiny spark of light will blossom into a nova that no evil can defeat.
Love will win out and time enough had passed to allow old wounds to heal and for fears to be laid to rest. They come together now as equals, destined to be together, naturally and with no trepidation.
This moment has been long in coming and the two men will treasure it and live within in it because their duty is a dangerous one and fate is fickle. Who knows when they can once again lie in each other's arms? Who knows when the Warrior must return to the shadows? Who knows when wars must be fought and love forfeited for the sake of a galaxy?
The Force is with them always, guiding them, but sometimes it must lead them away and they must follow, ever trusting to its call, for after all, it gave them each other.
Chapter 1
"I feel awkward," Obi-Wan said.
"Why?" Qui-Gon asked his companion, managing to look both amused and affronted.
The two Jedi, Obi-Wan and Qui-Gon, stood in the brightly lit corridor of the ship that would carry them home. It had been generously donated by the Queen in thanks for their aid in the liberation of her planet. It was new and sleek and not at all like the archaic transport vessels the Jedi usually had to gain passage on.
The hull vibrated slightly around them as the magnificently crafted ship took to the air, battling gravity and pushing its way through the atmosphere.
"Five years is a long time," Obi-Wan reminded his old master, leaning back on the smooth bulkhead.
"Is this the place to discuss this?" Qui-Gon gently chided, glancing meaningfully at a crewman who walked passed them, plainly curious as to why two of the ship's honoured passengers were standing, talking in the corridor.
"There is a nine year old boy sitting in your quarters, Qui-Gon, and forgive me but I'd rather a total stranger who we'll likely never see again overhear us than you new padawan." Obi-Wan had not meant to take his frustrations out on his master and immediately apologised, "Qui-Gon, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to..."
"No, you're right, Anakin does not need to hear this." Qui-Gon paused, thinking how best to proceed. "Let's at least find a quiet corner to sit in."
As they walked, Qui-Gon glanced over to Obi-Wan regularly, seeing the changes in the man he had once loved, still loved. The Jedi master was beginning to see just how complicated his life had become.
The two Jedi found one of the crew's break rooms unoccupied. The room was small, but not uncomfortable. Cushioned benches lined the walls with sofas and tables clustered near to create comfortable socialising areas. They helped themselves to the provided tea and settled themselves at one of the corner tables.
They stared at each other.
"Now I feel awkward."
Obi-Wan smiled. It was a look Qui-Gon had not seen for far too long. He smiled too, feeling some of his own anxiety leave him.
"I missed you," Qui-Gon began. "I knew that I would, but when I read of your death I felt a kind of despair I had hoped never to feel again," the Jedi master tried to explain and then cursed himself when he realised what he had just said; he did not want to make Obi-Wan feel guilty.
"I'm sorry."
Qui-Gon cringed a little to hear the remorse in Obi-Wan's voice. Countless times he had imagined this moment and now that it had arrived he found himself messing it up with his ill chosen words.
"It wasn't your fault," Qui-Gon easily reassured him. "You were only doing your duty; I've never been prouder. And the despair, it only lasted a moment."
Hurt flashed across Obi-Wan's face and once again the master cursed himself and his hasty words.
"I knew you weren't dead," he hastened to add; hoping that Obi-Wan would understand and forgive a foolish old man.
"What do we do now?" Obi-Wan asked, still as blunt as he had been when he had still been an apprentice. Qui-Gon remembered that he had despaired at Obi-Wan's diplomatic tact and while the young man had learnt, he had not conformed. Qui-Gon thought his padawan's life now much better suited Obi-Wan's temperament. He did not think that was by accident.
"We are Jedi," he finally answered. "We follow the Force."
"When I was young that never offered me much comfort," Obi-Wan confided quietly as he idly played with granules of sweetener that had been spilt on the table, but had not been cleaned away properly. "After the last five years it means much more than it used to."
"You have changed a great deal," Qui-Gon stated, studying the other man and seeing the difference while seeing all the similarities.
"Yes."
"While staying the same," Qui-Gon added.
"I've missed that." Obi-Wan smiled and looked up from the table top to look his old master in the eyes.
"What?"
"Your cryptic words."
"You had Yoda," Qui-Gon retorted.
"Different sort of cryptic."
"Different sort of... Obi-Wan!"
"Yes, Qui-Gon?" Obi-Wan had not had much practice with his innocent look since leaving his master, but he recreated it perfectly now nonetheless.
"That look hasn't worked since you were fourteen and I caught you with Reef."
Obi-Wan smiled and once again Qui-Gon saw the boy he had known in the man sat before him. The master was again stuck with remorse, but this time for more than ill chosen words.
"I'm sorry, Obi-Wan."
"What for?"
"For pushing you away."
"That was along time ago, and much has happened since." Obi-Wan leant forward and took Qui-Gon's hands in his own, also feeling regret for lost time. "Five years have passed and I still love you. I came back because I was called, but I revealed myself because I hoped that, maybe, you felt the same as I."
Qui-Gon was momentarily unable to speak. They had not said the words aloud to each other until now, not said I love you and mean it the way Obi-Wan meant now. Bitter regret swamped Qui-Gon's mind and he felt Obi-Wan's grasp tighten on his hands as the younger Jedi waited for his response.
"I do." He said the words then too, "I love you, Obi-Wan, more than life."
"That's all I need know, Qui-Gon, the rest can wait until later." He kissed their joined hands. "I pledge myself to you."
"And I myself to you," Qui-Gon answered Obi-Wan's oath with his own.
They were silent as they grasped each other's hands, cherishing this first moment as the first step towards completing their soulbond. And while Qui-Gon would have gladly dwelled in that moment and countless more like it, he knew that they could not and finally he was forced to speak the words that played on his mind.
"How does this affect your duties as the Warrior?"
"Or Anakin?" Obi-Wan asked right back, showing Qui-Gon that he was not the only one with concerns.
"I guess it doesn't," Obi-Wan answered for them both. "You are Anakin's master and I am your..."
"Lover?" Qui-Gon grinned at his companion whose hands he still held.
"Soulmate," Obi-Wan offered.
Qui-Gon's smile did not diminish to hear the shyly spoken word.
"We should speak to Anakin."
"As you say," Obi-Wan said by way of agreement, as he pulled his hands free from Qui-Gon's grip and stood to leave.
Qui-Gon rose also, happy for now with the settlement they had reached. It would not be that simple, he was not deluded into believing it would be so, and he was sure that Obi-Wan, too, knew that there would be more to discuss. But for now they left the break room and went to Qui-Gon and Anakin's cabin, where the young apprentice sat waiting for his master.
Across the galaxy another Jedi sat reading her mail. She had been away on a long, tiring mission to one of the rim worlds. She scanned through much of what awaited for her in her inbox until she came across a general announcement,
To all, It is with great joy that the Council can report that Knight Obi-Wan Kenobi, reported missing five years ago and believed dead, has been found alive and well. Due to security issues, more cannot be made public to all. May the Force be with you. Master Mace Windu.
Knight Bant sat back in her chair, stunned. Her dear friend was alive. She knew that there would be others as surprised and as happy as she at the news. Reef and Garen to name but two. As she thought on those who would celebrate Obi-Wan's return, her musings inevitably turned to Master Jinn. She prayed to the Force that finally her friend and his master would be able to act on their love and bond, she prayed five years was not too long to be apart from someone, and she prayed for a happy ending.
"Anakin?"
"Master Qui-Gon," Anakin said as he sprang to his feet as his new master entered their shared cabin, his enthusiasm, however, was curtailed when he saw the young knight enter the cabin behind Qui-Gon.
"Knight Kenobi," he said formally, still unsure of the knight and how his presence would affect his future as a Jedi or as Master Jinn's apprentice.
"You need not fear me, Padawan Skywalker."
"I don't fear you," Anakin told him boldly. "Jedi don't feel fear."
"Jedi may not, Anakin, but nine year old boys far from home and away from their mothers do."
Anakin studied Obi-Wan Kenobi and for a moment felt his fear bubble up into terror. This man was dangerous, he had seen straight through him to his carefully concealed fears but more than that his was a killer and assassin when needed. Anakin looked at the man dressed as a Jedi knight and remembered he was also a protector of the innocent. His fear abated.
"I don't fear you," he said again, this time with more truth.
"Anakin," Qui-Gon interrupted, "We came to speak with you of your future among the Jedi."
"The Council said I would be an apprentice, your apprentice." Anakin's fear rose again, but it was a different fear, fear and being parted from his dream before he had even had a chance.
"Of course, Anakin," Qui-Gon reassured the distraught boy, "but there is more to discuss."
As Qui-Gon calmed the boy and quieted his natural fears, Obi-Wan studied the child.
Danger, his senses screamed at him. Yes, he saw, this one would be a handful; he did seem too old to train, but must be trained nevertheless. There was arrogance in the boy, and pride, only seeds now, but Obi-Wan wondered about the future and their growth into something more, something bigger and far more dangerous.
'Qui-Gon is a good master; he will help the boy with his flaws.'
Danger, repeated though his mind, drowning out Obi-Wan's reasoned thoughts.
The Chosen One: a tempting target for the Sith.
Danger, echoed in his ears.
And something else, half-formed in the darkness of the future.
"Obi-Wan."
"Yes, Master?" Obi-Wan distractedly answered, not really hearing the voice calling his name. Time spiralled around him, he saw shadows and darkness, he looked at his two companions and saw death.
"Obi-Wan?" the voice calling him was concerned now.
Obi-Wan sucked in air though his mouth, gasping, stunned by the Darkness of the vision and the threatened future.
"No!" It could not be allowed.
"Obi-Wan?" Someone was gripping his arm.
"Forgive me, both of you," the knight managed to wheeze out, anchoring himself to the sensation of Qui-Gon's touch, not daring to look the older Jedi in the eye. "My mind wandered."
"What did you see?"
Obi-Wan did look at his master then and saw his concern and behind him he could see Anakin's curious face. He stared at them a moment, seeing death in their faces again.
"Nothing," he lied, pulling desperately away from the vision and Qui-Gon's touch. "A future prevented." Obi-Wan remembered the vision he had had on Naboo of a world where Qui-Gon and been slain by the Sith and where the Darkness had followed.
"Anakin and I were discussing your future with us." Qui-Gon told him. "I told him you would be a presence in his life, but would leave, on occasion."
"Yes," was all Obi-Wan could manage.
"You may go to Obi-Wan with any problems you have, Anakin." Qui-Gon told the boy, trying to finish the talk they had started, while all the time worrying over what had caused Obi-Wan to become so pale. "I am your Master and he is my Bondmate."
"Master Obi-Wan..."
"Don't call me that," Obi-Wan interrupted harshly, still disorientated by the vision of an alternative universe where he had guided Anakin Skywalker to knighthood. "Forgive me, Anakin. You have caught me at my worst. Please, call me Obi-Wan, all my friends do and I hope you and I will be friends."
"I hope that, too."
Obi-Wan smiled warmly at the boy.
"Qui-Gon, I will leave you now to talk with you apprentice." All Obi-Wan could think of was his need to escape and to distance himself from visions centred on the Chosen One. "I must go; I need to meditate." With those words the knight all but fled the cabin.
"Is he alright?" Anakin asked.
"Yes, I'll explain later. Now though, we have things to talk about. Come, sit with me on the floor and I'll give you your first lesson on meditation."
The cabin was, like the rest of the ship, compact, but comfortable. There was room enough for both Jedi to sit together on the floor. Qui-Gon, mindful of his age, was glad of the plush carpet that cushioned his knees. They sat together, facing each other, in the centre of the cabin.
"Close your eyes," Qui-Gon told Anakin, who obeyed. "The Council has given me permission to initiate a training bond. This may feel a little strange."
Qui-Gon entered the boy's mind smoothly and sought out the memories already joining them; he drew threads from each and weaved them into a single strand. A giggle distracted him from his task.
"I'm sorry, Anakin, I have not done this in a long time," he explained his clumsiness, continuing with constructing the bond, but trying harder not to 'tickle' Anakin's mind with his presence.
"Since Obi-Wan?"
"Hmm?" Qui-Gon beginning the delicate task of joining the two ends of the bond together, had not heard Anakin's question.
"You haven't formed a bond since Obi-Wan?"
"No, our bond formed naturally." Through the partially formed bond, Qui-Gon felt the boy's sudden uncertainty.
"Should our bond have formed like that?" Anakin asked, almost brokenly.
"No," Qui-Gon smiled in memory. "There was nothing about our partnership that was... normal."
It was difficult to explain to another exactly all that lay between himself and Obi-Wan, especially to one who had not even been an outside observer.
"There," he finally said, withdrawing from the boy's mind. "Our bond has begun; in time it will strengthen."
He felt Anakin poke none-too-gently at his end of the new bond.
"Careful, Anakin, it is still fragile."
"Yes, Master." Anakin continued to investigate the bond, but more lightly. "Will you tell me more about how Obi-Wan became your apprentice?"
"I shall, if you wish, but Anakin, there is no reason to fear or compare yourself to him. Each Jedi partnership is as different and individual as the Jedi that make it up. That difference does not make it better or worse." Qui-Gon looked at his new apprentice to make sure he understood.
"Yes, Master."
"Now, do you still want to know more about Obi-Wan's apprenticeship?"
"Maybe later," Anakin relpied. As Qui-Gon had suspected, it was Anakin's fear that prompted him to ask about Obi-Wan. "What about now though?"
"Now?"
"With Obi-Wan?"
"Ah, well at least you will have this much in common with Obi-Wan." The boy looked puzzled. "Both your apprenticeships are unusual."
Qui-Gon paused a moment to collect his thoughts and think on how best to explain to his new padawan the current situation.
"You understand about Obi-Wan's secret?"
A brief nod was his answer.
"And that you must tell no one?"
"I understand."
"I knew you would, as for the rest..." Once again Qui-Gon stopped, unsure how to tell his nine year old apprentice about Obi-Wan. "Obi-Wan and I..."
"You love him."
"Yes." He could not deny it, not anymore.
"And he loves you."
"Yes."
"Seems pretty simple to me," Anakin told him, not seeing why Qui-Gon should have any difficulty explaining.
'Oh, to be young again,' Qui-Gon thought. He envied the simplicity that youthful eyes gave to any circumstances and appreciated Master Yoda's joy at teaching the children at the Temple; the ancient master loved to be reminded of what it was like to see though innocent eyes.
"Yes, Anakin, that part is simple. Obi-Wan has been away five years, he's returned and we hope to reconcile, but this will not interfere with your training."
"Yes, Master." The boy seemed amused.
'You're surprised by that because?' Obi-Wan's voice asked within the privacy of his mind.
'Go away, Obi-Wan.'
Laughter followed, but he felt Obi-Wan withdraw some nonetheless.
"It's time for you to sleep, Anakin," Qui-Gon told his padawan, standing slowly, stretching out stiff muscles and joints.
"Aren't you going after Obi-Wan?" the boy remained on the floor, clearly surprised that his master was not going after the knight.
"He'll come back when he's ready."
Anakin did not appear to like this answer and frowned.
"You do not seek out the Warrior, Anakin."
"Yes, Master, but you do go after the one you love."
That, at least, was mostly true and sometimes the lines between the relationships would blur, but Qui-Gon knew that it had been the Warrior that fled, not his lover.
"Not this time," was all he said as he helped the boy up and hurried him into the fresher to prepare for bed.
Obi-Wan withdrew from Qui-Gon's mind and returned to his wanderings. He felt out of place and constrained. Being a Jedi knight again was going to be difficult, he knew; he had spent so long away, hiding from them while being their Shadow that he was not sure if he would be able to interact with them as a normal Jedi.
Obi-Wan did not sleep that night, nor the next. In fact, he stayed away from the other passengers and crew as much as possible on the journey home. Qui-Gon had a sense of him so he knew that the younger man had not jumped ship, but after their boarding and initial conversation, the Jedi Master did not seen his lost apprentice.
Obi-Wan, for his part, was trying to reconcile the two parts of his personality; Knight and Warrior. Shadows and deceit were no longer his constant companion; they were allies, but sometimes he would be able to step out from them and into the Light of the Jedi and the love of Qui-Gon Jinn.
'This is going to take some getting used to,' Obi-Wan thought as he felt the ship drop out of hyperspace that signalled their arrival. He knew that his time for hiding from his bondmate was over.
Chapter 2
The three Jedi aboard the Naboo cruiser felt the presence of Coruscant before it was visible, which was why all three were present in the control room when the city planet came into view. Each stared at the planet as it grew larger on the view screen, each alone with his thoughts.
For Anakin Skywalker it was only his second time to the Republic's centre. The planet, to him, represented his dreams and this time his dreams were emerging as reality. He could feel the life of the planet buzzing though the Force, energizing him.
Qui-Gon felt his new student's excitement through the new bond and he smiled at the boy's exuberance. To him, the ugly, polluted planet was home, even if the living Force here was dampened, because still the Temple held so many memories and friends. With a new apprentice he would be spending more time there now than he had in the last five years.
Obi-Wan looked at the planet and saw the Dark and Light within, vying for dominance. Coruscant had not been home for a long time and the planet smelt of corruption to him now. The pollution clouded his senses and the dull, lifeless mettle seemed to sap his strength. He gazed upon the city and felt weary.
'This isn't right,' he thought. 'I'm coming home.'
Immersing himself in the Force, he found the feeling only grew worse. He glanced at Qui-Gon and Anakin, both of whom seemed unaware of the inky Darkness suffocating the planet.
Without a word to either of his companions, Obi-Wan slunk away, into the shadows of the control room. He left through one of the smaller side doors and headed to Qui-Gon's cabin. He picked up his pack and then returned to the maintenance corridors where he had spent most of the journey. He found a quiet corner and called the Council.
"Windu."
Despite the situation, Obi-Wan could not resist the opportunity to test the revered council member's patience.
"Mace, my main man. How's it hanging?"
There was a long silence on the other end of the com link. Obi-Wan grinned into the darkness. He remembered what it had felt like to be part of a team with a maverick as master. In many ways it had been fun, but being a rogue was even better.
"Did you need something, Knight Kenobi?" Mace was ignoring his behaviour.
'Spoil sport.'
"I want to know if anything is happening on planet."
"Such as?" the council member asked, confused.
"I don't know, but something's made all my senses go all... wiggy."
There was another pause.
"Wiggy?"
"I can't think of another way of describing it to you. Anakin and Qui-Gon seem oblivious to it and so are you, apparently. Things that only I can sense never bode well, Mace," Obi-Wan reminded his friend and contact on the Council.
A third pause, but this time Mace was taking Obi-Wan's question seriously. He would be a fool not to.
"I'll put a file together of events that happened in the last twenty four hours."
"Better make it the last week."
"Alright. What are you going to do?"
"I'll let you know." As an after thought, Obi-Wan added, "Don't tell Qui-Gon."
"Obi-Wan..."
"I know, I'm sorry." Obi-Wan took a moment to think of why he had said such a thing to Mace. He, of all people, knew the delicacy of Obi-Wan's position. "I'm just finding this double life confusing, and it hasn't even begun yet, not really."
"I bet."
"I need time to work out the boundaries."
"Do you have that time, Obi-Wan?"
"I have to go," Obi-Wan said, not answering Mace's question. "The ship's landing."
"I'll complete the data for you and send it to you the usual way."
The two Jedi signed off, neither of them happy with the conversation they had just had.
Obi-Wan felt the jolt as the ship landed and at the same moment he felt a query come through the bond from Qui-Gon. He ignored it, with no apology. He was doing his duty, he was doing what he must; Qui-Gon would understand.
'I'm not hiding from him,' his guilty mind reasoned as he made his way to the cargo bay doors. 'Nor am I running, I'm following the Force.'
He left the ship without being seen and followed his senses until he was buried in the swirling Darkness. He followed it through walkways of bustling crowds, over busy airways and finally he came to the Senate. Finding corruption here did not surprise Obi-Wan, but the presence of such Darkness amazed him.
When Qui-Gon turned to talk to Obi-Wan and found him gone, he was surprised. Obi-Wan's stealth, with which he had withdrawn both physically and mentally, was astonishing. The Jedi master had felt nothing. When the ship had finally landed and he had reached out to the younger man and received no answer, he understood Obi-Wan's sudden and complete withdrawal.
'I'd hoped for a little more time together,' Qui-Gon thought as he walked with his new apprentice into the Temple. He had known their life together would be difficult, had known it the moment that the full force of the Jedi protector was revealed to him when his old padawan had fought and defeated the Sith Warrior. He had also known that in all likelihood they would spend as much time apart as they did together. That is not to say, however, he enjoyed the time without Obi-Wan by his side, they had spent five years away from each other, surely one night was not too much to ask.
Qui-Gon guided Anakin through the many corridors of the Temple, nodding greetings to other Jedi as he passed them, all the time heading towards his... our... quarters, he corrected himself.
They were not far from their destination when Qui-Gon heard someone calling his name.
"Master Jinn!"
Qui-Gon and Anakin turned in the direction of the speaker. Walking, albeit very quickly, towards them was another Jedi knight.
"Bant, how are you?" Qui-Gon asked when she reached them.
"I am well, Master Jinn," the Calamarian woman answered. "Where is Obi-Wan?"
At Qui-Gon's amused, but surprised look, the knight took a long breath and apologised for her abruptness.
"I'm sorry, Master Jinn, but I've been waiting to see him since I heard the news, is he not with you?"
"Not currently," Qui-Gon said, but added when he saw her disappointment, "I'm sure he'll be back at the Temple soon."
"Will he be staying with you, Master?"
"Knight Bant!"
The young Jedi knight had the grace to blush with embarrassment and found herself apologising for the second time to one of the most respected masters in the Order.
"Apologises again," she said, flustered. "I just wanted to tell him..."
She trailed off and gazed forlornly at the floor. Qui-Gon took pity on her. He reached out and patted her gently on the shoulder. She looked up to find him smiling at her.
"I know the feeling exactly, Bant. I'll tell him you want to see him, as I'm sure he is just as eager to see you as well."
"Thank you, Master Jinn."
"And I'd also like you to meet my new apprentice, Anakin Skywalker. Anakin, this is Knight Bant, she is an old friend of Obi-Wan's."
"It's a pleasure to meet you Knight Bant." Anakin said, not quite hiding his grin at seeing the Jedi getting flustered in front of Master Jinn.
"Same here," Bant said, also smiling. "I look forward to getting to know you better."
"Now, if you will excuse us, Bant, we are heading back to our quarters."
"Forgive me again Master Jinn, for keeping you. It's a pleasure seeing you again Master, you too Anakin."
Bant bowed to the master before hurrying off before she embarrassed herself further.
Qui-Gon watched her go, amused and through the training bond he could sense his apprentice's own amusement and trepidation.
"Something wrong, Ani?"
"She's weird."
Qui-Gon laughed.
"Come Anakin, let's head on."
The Jedi carried on down the corridor and turned a corner and finally they arrived at their quarters.
"I hope you like it here, Anakin," Qui-Gon said as he led the boy through the front door. "There isn't much room, but it has been home to me since I took my first apprentice."
The quarters were clean and tidy, had been since Obi-Wan had vacated them five years earlier. Qui-Gon had never been able to stop the boy from accumulating clutter. He wondered if his quarters would once again turn into a cluttered oasis, although with Anakin's mechanics and Obi-Wan's return he guessed that they would. The Jedi master found he did not mind the idea.
'Maybe it'll feel more like a home again.'
Anakin grinned to see his new home and Qui-Gon left him happily exploring his new room. Qui-Gon checked his messages; amongst them was one from Mace telling him to get Anakin settled before going before the Council in the morning. There was no mention of Obi-Wan.
'Not that there should be.' Qui-Gon tried to quiet the irrational part of his mind. The Jedi's Shadow went where he pleased, following the Force's beacon, not the Council's and certainly not the Senate's.
'And not his old master, either.'
After a quick meditation exercise, Qui-Gon packed Anakin off to bed, knowing the boy was exhausted, even if he would not admit it. Qui-Gon tucked him in, smiling gently when his young apprentice all but fell asleep as soon as his head hit the pillow. Before slumber claimed him completely however, he managed to ask one question, a single question that was easy to ask, but had no simple answer.
"What happened to Obi-Wan?"
"He'll be back," Qui-Gon told him and perhaps luckily for the master, the boy fell asleep before he could ask when.
Qui-Gon returned to the main living space and sat facing the large, east facing picture window. The day had long fled and Coruscant was alight with a million tiny points of light. Qui-Gon closed his eyes, blocking out the beautiful view to turn his thoughts inwards; he meditated, centring himself within the Force.
A great deal had changed with the Naboo mission. He had a new apprentice, his lost apprentice had returned and he finally understood the song within the Force that surrounded himself and Obi-Wan. He chided himself for his foolishness and short-sightedness. The strength and presence of the bond was undeniable. Yet he had tried to, for many years. Now that he knew of its existence he wondered how he could have so easily ignored it.
A fait tingle across the soulbond made him open his eyes. Obi-Wan knelt opposite him, mirroring his position, eyes closed, seemingly in deep meditation. The continued tingle on the bond told Qui-Gon differently.
"I'm glad I amuse you, Obi-Wan."
Obi-Wan immediately gave up the pretence; he opened his eyes and grinned.
"When did you get here?"
"Couple of hours."
Qui-Gon gave a start and for the first time noticed dawn had began to edge its way into the night's sky.
"Perhaps I should have woken you earlier," Obi-Wan suggested, not even attempting to hide the mischief in his eyes.
Part of Qui-Gon was delighted to hear that dry tone once again, as memories stirred of years past when that dry humour had kept them both amused on long missions, however the other part of him just stared at the other Jedi in mild annoyance.
"There is no point in you doing that, Qui-Gon, you can't intimidate me anymore," Obi-Wan informed him, his posture indeed showing his complete lack of dread.
The master gave a dramatic sigh, silently glad that they both now found each other as equals, before turning the conversation to other matters.
"I missed you," and after a moment's thought he added, "Again."
"I know," was all Obi-Wan said in reply.
"You're back now?"
"Yes."
"Do you know for how long?"
"No."
Silence followed Obi-Wan's direct, but honest answer.
"I saw Bant earlier, or rather she chased me down in the corridor," Qui-Gon told his bondmate. "She was looking for you."
Obi-Wan nodded and looked thoughtful.
"I will speak with her tomorrow."
"You don't look too thrilled at the prospect, Obi-Wan."
"I just don't know what to say to her, to any of them," Obi-Wan told his old master, knowing he could be honest with the other man, knowing he would never be judged too harshly for it.
"They're your friends and colleagues, Obi-Wan, they will understand and you will find that your time apart is not such a large barrier after all."
Obi-Wan nodded again, but did not speak further. He trusted in Qui-Gon's words, after all reconnecting with his old master had not been difficult, only a little awkward at times when they found themselves on previously unexplored territory.
"I suppose we should get what little sleep we can before the day is truly upon us." Qui-Gon rose and made towards his sleeping chamber. He turned back when he noticed that his companion was not following. "Are you coming?"
"I did not like to presume," Obi-Wan explained, realising that one of those awkward moments had sneaked up on him. "We haven't really talked about it, properly, and I was... unsure."
"There'll be time tomorrow, but for tonight I am tired and I would like it very much to have your company while I sleep."
Obi-Wan smiled as he stood.
"I'd like that, too."
Qui-Gon returned to his side to take his hand and led him into their bedroom.
They both took their turn in the fresher; stripping down to their under tunics and leggings. Qui-Gon exited the small room to find Obi-Wan standing in the centre of his bedroom, once more looking uncertain.
"Obi-Wan?"
"I'm sorry, Qui-Gon."
"For?" The Jedi master could not think of anything his old padawan should be sorry for.
"I... we... waited years for this and it's not exactly..."
"How you imagined?" Qui-Gon guessed.
"Yes."
"Things long sought after rarely are, Padawan."
"I know, but still I had hoped."
"Still feel awkward?"
"Yes." The lost look on Obi-Wan's face was more than enough to make Qui-Gon reach out to his soulmate.
"Then let me help."
Qui-Gon went to Obi-Wan and took him into his arms. Obi-Wan gratefully sunk into the long dreamt of embrace. The Jedi master knew that his padawan had matured greatly in the five years since their parting and he also had some understanding of the burden of responsibility that lay heavily upon his shoulders, but as the younger man stood in the safety of his embrace he realised that in other ways Obi-Wan was still the shy, unsure boy he had taken as his apprentice at thirteen. Five years living as a Shadow had not enabled Obi-Wan to come out of himself in any way except as an assassin and warrior.
"I love you, Qui-Gon." The voice was slightly muffled because Obi-Wan had buried his face in Qui-Gon's tunics.
"And I you," Qui-Gon replied and smiled into the tawny hair. As smoothly as he could he guided Obi-Wan to the bed. He sat first before pulling Obi-Wan down next to him. Before Obi-Wan could utter any kind of protest, Qui-Gon laid them down, facing the wall size window, which showed the approaching dawn. Obi-Wan lay snug in Qui-Gon's arms, their legs entwined.
"So," Obi-Wan began and Qui-Gon waited patiently for the young Jedi to gather his thoughts. "You prefer the right side of the bed."
That was not what the master had expected, but with Obi-Wan he should have guessed something odd would come out of his mouth.
"It's closer to the fresher," he answered, playing along.
"This is nice," Obi-Wan spoke drowsily, feeling safe in Qui-Gon's arms.
Qui-Gon squeezed Obi-Wan a little closer when he heard the loneliness in his partner's voice.
"How long has it been?"
"Since I felt safe?" Obi-Wan turned over so that he faced his old master. "Since I left you on the landing platform five years ago."
"You have been alone since then?"
"More or less. Alone no; I had Mace, Yoda and the rest of the Council, at least partly, but I was lonely. I had always had the bond, or at least the hope of it. It was my Light in the Darkness."
"It's what kept you going?" Qui-Gon asked, feeling awed and honoured by the depth of Obi-Wan's love.
"Yes and when I needed something tangible, I had a small token to cling to."
Qui-Gon looked puzzled.
"It was a gift to a boy who was angry; it was his centre. Later, it was a reminder of first commitments. Then it was hidden away in my pack to remind me of home and the love left behind there."
"You found it then?" Qui-Gon asked, realising what it was Obi-Wan had clung to in his loneliness.
"Yes."
Qui-Gon was glad that his gift had brought Obi-Wan some comfort both as a boy, when he had first become his apprentice, and then later when he had been knighted.
"And where is it now?"
"In my boot."
"What?" Qui-Gon could not believe his ears. "You kept a stone in your boot?"
"I can't always guarantee I'll have time to grab my pack, and some of the costumes I've worn over the years do not leave much room for pockets. I always had my boots and 'Sabre with me and I couldn't keep it in my 'Sabre," Obi-Wan told his old master his reasoning in keeping the treasured gift in his boot.
"Isn't it uncomfortable?" Qui-Gon sounded anything but convinced by Obi-Wan's explanation.
"It's comforting."
Qui-Gon did not argue further; he was secretly pleased. By this time Qui-Gon lay on his back with Obi-Wan lying half on him, his head pillowed on Qui-Gon's chest. The light from the sun had started to make its lazy way into the bedroom. In a few hours they would have to rise and start the day. Qui-Gon had no need to remind Obi-Wan of this, for when he looked down he found the young man fast asleep.
"I'm glad you are back, my Obi-Wan; and safe," he whispered, before he, too, fell asleep.
Chapter 3
Obi-Wan awoke alone mid-morning. He stretched lazily and was glad that it had not been him to leave Qui-Gon to wake up alone. The morning sun was high in the sky and he relished its warmth as it bathed the bed in light. He snuggled into the blankets, glad of a soft bed and clean sheets.
'Are you ever going to get up?' Qui-Gon's amused voice sounded in his mind.
'I was considering it.'
'I don't know, a perfectly good knight spends five years from his master and he goes soft.'
Obi-Wan snorted and struggled up from the bed. He went to the fresher for a quick shower, grabbing his travel pack as he passed. He had left it by the front door when he had seen Qui-Gon in meditation the night before. His old master must have moved it as he slept. Part of Obi-Wan was pleased to know he felt safe enough to sleep through Qui-Gon's movements, but the Warrior part of him was faintly disturbed by it.
'What are you doing?' he asked through the half-formed bond as he stepped into the shower.
'Showing Anakin around the Temple. Then I have to meet with the Council.' Obi-Wan could sense Qui-Gon desperately trying not to think of Obi-Wan naked, in the shower, alone, as he spoke. 'Do you have plans?'
'I'm going to see Mace and then Bant later and then will probably join you for your session with the Council.'
'Do they know that?'
'No.' Obi-Wan grinned, enjoying being able to share his humour with someone else. 'Don't tell them.'
'Wouldn't dream of it.'
Obi-Wan dressed in his last clean uniform, deliberately catching a glimpse of his naked body in the mirror and allowing Qui-Gon to see it.
'Anakin is calling, I'll speak to you later.' There was regret and relief in Qui-Gon's voice.
Obi-Wan ate a quick, late first meal and then he made a request to stores to send him some new tunics, leggings and other clothing as well as to send up his personal belongs that would have been put into storage upon his 'death'. They would be delivered by evening meal. He then turned to other matters, which included that shadow that still hung low on the planet.
"This everything?" the Shadow asked Mace, glancing through the data pad the councillor had completed of the events on Coruscant within the last week. Mace had been a little surprised when Obi-Wan had come to his office; face-to-face meetings were not their usual way of exchanging information.
"Right down to the times of maintenance repairs."
"Good."
After leaving Qui-Gon's quarters, Obi-Wan had sought Mace out in his office, knowing that the master would have gathered the information he had requested. The office was light and airy, like much of the temple. Mace's window faced westward and Obi-Wan wondered if that was my accident or by default. He knew Mace liked to work from dawn until dusk; was the sight of the sinking sun a sign to the master of a day of hard work done?
"What do you hope to find?" Mace looked at the Jedi that sat before him. To the untrained eye he looked like any other Jedi, but to Mace he was cast both in Darkness and Light; a physical joining of the two side of the Force.
"I don't know... a reason?"
Mace nodded, even though the answer given meant nothing to him. He had learnt quickly, as had the rest of the Council, not to push Obi-Wan. He would speak when he was ready or simply act first and report to the Council after. There were millions of details on the list and Mace hoped amongst them was the something that would aid his friend.
"How's Qui-Gon?" he asked, hoping to catch the knight unawares as he skimmed through the data pad.
"Subtle, Mace, really."
"I wasn't trying for subtle."
"Mind your own business."
The whole time they had been talking, Obi-Wan's mind had been entirely focused on the information he was reading, not on what Mace was saying.
"It is my own business." This, as last, got Obi-Wan's attention. The young man looked at the Council member incredulously.
"How?"
"Two dear friends of mine are hoping to bond, one of them happens to be a maverick field agent and the other is a rogue."
Obi-Wan nodded, conceding the point.
"On top of that," Mace continued, "one of them has recently taken a new padawan who happens to be the Chosen One."
"So, just to clarify," Obi-Wan said, looking at Mace in such a manner that was not designed to put the older Jedi at ease, "Are you asking as a friend or as a member of the Council?"
"Force damn it, Obi-Wan."
Usually Obi-Wan would take great delight at being one of only a few people who could rile the usually unflappable master, but the subject of Qui-Gon and himself and their bond was too serious a matter.
"It's complicated," was all he would admit to.
"Funny, he said exactly the same thing."
Obi-Wan lifted his brows in question.
"I bumped into him and Anakin in the library when I was down there loading your data."
"Oh." Obi-Wan put the pad down and steepled his hands in a mirror image of the other Jedi; a side effect of being connected in such a way to the other Jedi was that he found that he picked up the mannerisms and personality traits of those he was physically close to or in tune with. This, in part, was why he fought so hard to maintain his own dry humour and tormented the Council; he knew these traits were his own and that with their presence he knew his personality was not being swallowed up by the other Jedi. "As a friend then..."
A moment of silence followed as Obi-Wan thought how best to tell Mace.
"The love part, that's easy," he explained. "That part was always easy, but Anakin, myself and the bond are not things that merge very well together."
"How so?"
Obi-Was was lost inside his own mind as he thought out the future he would share with Qui-Gon.
"I worry I will lose myself in Qui-Gon; he's so strong. I worry that I'll get myself killed or won't be there to save him or Anakin. I worry about the cloud that still lingers over the boy."
He paused to think on other fears.
"I am afraid for the Jedi and the Republic. I am afraid that I'll have to choose between duty and love and that I do not know if I am strong enough to choose."
"Are these fears of a man or the Jedi protector?"
"I don't know, and that is what scares me the most."
"That is a lot of fear for one Jedi."
"I know, and mostly I don't notice it. My senses drown out any reservations I may have and I follow the Force's guidance, but when I am alone and have nowhere to go, I am left wondering at what the future will be and my part in it."
Obi-Wan looked into Mace's eyes and for the first time Mace saw the anguish hidden beneath the Jedi's cool veneer.
"What if the bond becomes a hindrance?" Obi-Wan whispered and Mace was instantly reminded of when Obi-Wan had first discovered his destiny and the uncertainty he felt and the assurance he has sought in his master's old friend.
"Do you really believe that it will?"
"I feel," dizziness swept though Obi-Wan's mind. The future of the bond was hidden from him; too much lay between for any real truths to emerge. "I feel joy within it, but I think somewhere there is great sadness; pain worse than death."
"You have no idea what it is?" Mace prompted, hoping to gain further insight into what was burdening his friend's thoughts so severely.
"None."
"Obi-Wan, the Force gave you a gift, you and Qui-Gon both. You trusted the Force all your life, followed the path it lay before you, are you really going to desert it now?"
Obi-Wan looked shocked and insulted.
"No, of course not, I just wonder is all."
He rose from the chair and walked from Mace's office, absent-mindedly scrolling though the data pad once more. Mace watched him go, his feelings of unease growing.
'At least he used the door like normal people,' he thought, although, truth to tell, he would have felt more reassured if the young knight had done his usual appearing and disappearing act.
"Mace?"
"Yes Obi-Wan?" he replied to the knight who had stealthily returned, though he had still used the door.
"I told you as a friend."
"And if I asked as a member of the Council?"
"Then you'd be removing the hilt of your lightsabre from your throat." As he left, Mace was not entirely sure if he was joking, however the meaning was clear: the bond was off limits to the Council. Mace cringed at the thought of the confrontations that were sure to follow.
"Bant."
"Obi-Wan!" Bant shrieked in greeting, throwing her arms around her oldest friend. She had been resting, recuperating from her most recent mission, when her door chimed. She opened it to find a familiar face smiling a little uncertainly at her.
As Obi-Wan felt Bant's arms go around him he automatically returned the embrace. After only an instant he relaxed into his friend's arms and simply held his friend who he had not seen for five years. Qui-Gon had been right, there had been no need to worry, being with Bant was as easy as it had been when they were children.
"Come in, come in."
Obi-Wan followed the other knight into her quarters, glancing around as he did so. They resonated with his friend's life force, and her calming presence was abundant within the apartment's walls.
"I should call the others, let them know you are here."
"No," Obi-Wan quickly objected, not sure if he could managed all his old friends at once. "I am not sure I am ready for Garen and Reef yet."
Bant nodded her understanding, seeing the momentary flash of uncertainty in Obi-Wan's eyes.
"I'm glad you are here," she told him as they sat down. "Where have you been, Obi-Wan?"
Obi-Wan did not want to lie to his crèche mate; they had been through so much together, however he could not tell her the whole truth either. So, instead he settled on telling her nothing at all and hoped she would understand.
"I'm sorry Bant, I can't talk about it and even if I could, I don't think I'm ready to."
"I understand." And the Calamarian Jedi did. A Jedi's life was difficult and at time harsh on those sent out to fight for the innocent in a galaxy that was unforgiving. Instead they spoke of other things, Bant taking pleasure in being able to impart to Obi-Wan five years worth of gossip. When it came time to leave it was Obi-Wan that pulled Bant into his arms.
"Thank you," he whispered into her ear.
"I'm your friend, Obi-Wan."
"I know," Obi-Wan said, thanking the Force for the gift of his friend. "I will see you later."
"Settling in you are, little one?" Yoda asked Anakin.
"Yes, Master Yoda."
This Council session was more to do with procedure that any real need for a debriefing; most of the Council had been on Naboo and the defeat of the Trade Federation and the Sith had all been discussed while still on the planet. As far as Qui-Gon could see, the point of the audience was to check up on him and his new charge. His irritation was moderated by the knowledge that they did it out of concern for him and the boy. The presence of the young man who stood at the back of the Council chamber did not hurt his patience any, either.
Obi-Wan had not spoken since he had entered shortly after the master-apprentice pair. He had not said anything, but his presence was felt nonetheless. He stood, not really focusing on any one thing or person. He glanced at all those gathered, spent some time studying the polished marble floor and staring out the large glass windows that offered a panoramic view of the city's skyline. There was, however, no doubt that he missed nothing.
"We have learnt no more of the mystery of the Sith," Mace told them solemnly.
"Knight Kenobi is certain that it was the apprentice he killed."
"I concur," Qui-Gon said.
"Know nothing of this creature we do, or its interest in the Naboo. Be wary we must."
Qui-Gon felt as though they were going over old ground. He knew Obi-Wan felt the same when a picture popped into his head of the entire Council taking part in the solstice games, which were traditionally used to train padawans to not fret on things that were out of their control. Obi-Wan's version, however, had all twelve members in various compromising positions.
'Bored, Obi-Wan?'
He did not get an answer. He did, however, feel a wave of anger from his bondmate. He tuned back into the Council's conversation and realised they were discussing their relationship; his and Obi-Wan's and their still incomplete bond.
"Padawan Skywalker?" Obi-Wan spoke for the first time. "Please kindly wait outside for your master."
"Yes, Knight Kenobi," the boy dutifully answered and left the mature Jedi alone, unable to help glancing behind him as he left, curious as to what Obi-Wan did not want him to hear.
"Well?" Yarael Poof prompted after his departure.
Qui-Gon was ready to answer their questions; had expected them. The bond not only affected the Jedi's Warrior, but also the master of the newly discovered Chosen One. For a long time the Council had known what Obi-Wan meant to the Order, the implications of Anakin were new.
"Well, what?" Obi-Wan jumped in before Qui-Gon could speak. He turned slightly to find the other Jedi standing next to him; his equal.
"Have you completed the bond?" Poof prodded.
"Which part of 'none of your business' did you have trouble understanding when you asked me earlier?" Obi-Wan's voice was cold and hard and there was no doubt he was furious.
Qui-Gon was amazed. He was known to defy the Council, but Obi-Wan was downright belligerent.
"Obi-Wan," Yoda called. Qui-Gon was further surprised to hear it was not a reprimand for his behaviour. It was a plea for co-operation. It was good to be the Jedi Warrior he decided.
'You may think that now, give it a couple of cycles and I doubt you'll find me deliberately baiting the Council as amusing,' Obi-Wan told him straight to his mind, not ceasing to glare at the Council as he spoke to his bondmate.
'Deliberately?'
"Obi-Wan and I have not discussed it yet ourselves," Qui-Gon said diplomatically.
'Spoil sport.' Obi-Wan told his master, faintly annoyed at Qui-Gon for defusing the situation.
"Discuss it you should, then come speak to us you will."
Obi-Wan opened his mouth to argue, but this time Qui-Gon beat him to it.
"Yes, Master."
"Remember, Obi-Wan, you may be the Jedi Warrior, but in other matters you still answer to us."
Obi-Wan growled at Mundi.
'Careful, Mundi,' Qui-Gon thought to himself. 'Push too hard, try to hold him back in any way and he'll leave us all.' Qui-Gon thought back to when he had first felt the presence back on Tyron and then Naboo; he remembered thinking of it as a shadow. He could not think of a more apt description of what Obi-Wan was. Although he was ablaze with the Light, he was not completely without the Darkness; he is neither and both... a shadow.
'That is always as I have thought of myself,' Obi-Wan said, seeming to be able to have more than one conversation at once.
Obi-Wan bowed to the Council and Qui-Gon followed suit. They turned and left together.
"Of all the insufferable, stuffed up, arrogant..."
"What do you expect if you 'deliberately' bait them?"
"I'm sorry, Qui-Gon." The fight left Obi-Wan as quickly as it had come.
"What's wrong?"
"I don't know," he said truthfully. "I feel shadows all around me and underneath it all I feel an itch as if I should be doing something, but don't know what."
"Come, lets all three of us," Qui-Gon nodded to Anakin who was quietly waiting up the hall. "Go to the training salles. Anakin can watch his new master be beaten into the ground by his predecessor."
"I'd like that."
The three Jedi walked together through the Temple halls and if they noticed the whispers or furtive glances or heard the gossip of the Chosen one, the Sith or Obi-Wan's return from the dead or Qui-Gon's latest resistance to the Council's wishes, they gave no sign.
The Jedi found an empty training room, wanting to escape some of the more obvious stares. Anakin sat quietly, but excitedly on one of the benches that lined the enormous room. The whole Temple was on a scale he had never been able to imagine and even the private training areas boasted vast spaces with high, sawing ceilings so that any Jedi intent on practice and training was not limited by the size of the room.
Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan stood at the room's centre. They had shed their cloaks and ran through a number of warm up exercises, but now they were ready to begin. Qui-Gon studied his opponent, noting the similarities and differences in his stance. He knew that if Obi-Wan fought as the Shadow he could not hope to win and in truth even without his added senses, Obi-Wan was a formidable opponent.
Obi-Wan in turn studied Qui-Gon, happy to be once again indulging in the simple pleasure of sparring with his master. Judging from Qui-Gon's faint smile, Obi-Wan thought that he was not the only one taking pleasure in the anticipation. He gripped the borrowed practice sabre, feeling its weight and balance. He had yet to build a new one to replace the one lost on Naboo, so for now he had to make do with the less powerful training weapon. Answering Qui-Gon's smile with one of his own, Obi-Wan leapt at Qui-Gon, choosing to attack low, instead of using his usual aerial style.
Qui-Gon knew Obi-Wan too well and had expected his old apprentice to try and disconcert him by breaking his usual habits and had Qui-Gon been any less of a swordsman, the ploy may have worked. But even if Qui-Gon was not an equal to the Jedi Warrior, he certainly was a worthy adversary.
The battle raged and Anakin watched its fast turns and lightning kicks almost breathlessly. He had only seen the Jedi fight with their 'sabres a couple of times; once on Tatooine and the second time on Naboo in the hanger. However, both times his viewing had been interrupted. Now he watched the magnificent dance and deep in his mind where he kept his fears he pictured himself, lightsabre in hand, fighting against injustice and freeing the galaxy from tyranny.
The duel ended, Obi-Wan neatly knocking Qui-Gon's weapon from his hand, and both Jedi bowed to each other in respect for each other's abilities.
"Wow," Anakin said to them both as they walked over to him to put their cloaks back on. "That was wizard."
"Thank you, Padawan."
"Will I be able to do that one day?" Anakin asked, treasuring the image he had created in his mind.
"In time, my apprentice. In time."
Chapter 4
Obi-Wan, Qui-Gon and Anakin quickly settled into a routine at the Temple; their first cycle together on Coruscant consisted of Qui-Gon instructing Anakin, who also attended other lessons with the Temple, while also teaching other classes for older padawan learners, and Obi-Wan spent as much of his time with the master and apprentice as he did apart from them. As yet, he and Qui-Gon had still not talked about their soulbond or the future. The bond itself was uncompleted. Obi-Wan was restless and Qui-Gon sensed the turmoil in his young love. The Jedi master was willing to give Obi-Wan the time he needed to reconcile both parts of his duties as a Jedi with each other before further complicating it with a soulbond. Qui-Gon woke many mornings to find Obi-Wan in his arms when they had been empty when he had gone to sleep, the young man succumbing to the call of the bond if only for an hour or so.
He suspected it might seem strange to the Council that they waited so long to join together completely, but Qui-Gon knew Obi-Wan like no other; he felt his restlessness and beneath that he felt something more. A fear, perhaps, or a doubt as to the rightness of the bond and the kind of love they felt for each other. Both Jedi had spent many years alone and were dedicated to their lives as Jedi. Their soulbond was more than true love's presence within the Force; it was a destiny that no one knew the meaning of.
Qui-Gon knew all this and let Obi-Wan distract himself with whatever the perceived threat he had discovered was. He did not know if it was serious nor asked the knight the nature of the shadow. He let it be and the three together became a unit; reconnecting and forging new friendships.
"We should force the issue."
Mace looked around the Council chamber and did not like that more than one member of the Council was nodding their agreement to the suggestion.
"The bond is important to the order," the other Council member continued. "We have a right to know of its progress."
Mace knew that Qui-Gon would be angry if he ever heard about the contents of this meeting, but it was not his old friend's anger that worried him, it was the anger of someone far more dangerous. It seemed, to Mace as he sat and listened to the other Jedi argue back and forth on an issue they had not control over, that since Obi-Wan's return to the living his colleagues had forgotten just who the young man was; without the veil of shadows, Obi-Wan Kenobi was just as vulnerable to the Council's scrutiny as any other young knight.
"We cannot order Obi-Wan," Mace reminded them, hoping to inject some reason into the unreasonable debate.
"In matters concerning his duties as Warrior that is true," Mundi said, sounding like a man who believed he had found a loop-hole to a particularly difficult problem, "but the bond does not fall under that category."
Mace was not sure that the young Jedi Warrior would see it that way and it was becoming apparent to Mace that the Shadow could not separate himself out into parts and he knew that if he was beginning to see this, it would not be long before the Jedi in question realised it also. Trying to get a room full of Jedi masters who could not understand what it meant to be the Jedi protector to grasp this was not going to be easy. He turned to Yoda for help, but the words died in his throat when he saw the smirk on the ancient Jedi's face.
His brows furrowed in confusion.
"And you are in a position to judge that?"
The voice was new, but not unfamiliar. Mace looked to the shadows and saw a figure step from them. In the past, Obi-Wan had pulled this trick on him, and it had irritated him. Watching it happen now to someone else caused him to understand Yoda's smug look and produced one of his own.
"Knight Kenobi," Mundi greeted. "You were not called to this meeting."
"I know," the young man said as he came to stand in the room's centre. "And yet I came anyway."
Obi-Wan's tone was casual and respectful, but Mace detected the underlying threat there. Mundi, however, seemed to be oblivious.
"It is time you learnt your place, boy."
Mace watched the unfolding confrontation with interest and a feeling of dread which was why he saw the exact moment when Obi-Wan ceased to be Knight Kenobi and became the Jedi Warrior. Every line of his body changed; it spoke of a predator in waiting, of constrained power and of death but a hair's breadth away. The room seemed chilled as the mask of indifference fell upon the Warrior's face.
"I know my place," he said, his voice harsh and cold. "It is to protect the Jedi from within as well as from without."
"You question my allegiance?" For the first time Mundi seemed to realise his error.
"No," he replied, which was a relief to every Jedi present. "I answer to the Force; I protect its servants, even from themselves."
There was a brief pause as Obi-Wan made sure his point had been made.
"Since my return, with Qui-Gon, the Council has taken liberties in matters that do not concern it. I am still the Shadow, even when seen by all; you have to trust me to do my duty."
"It is not that we do not trust you..." Adi began, beseeching Obi-Wan to see their side.
"Isn't it?" Obi-Wan demanded back, unwilling to let Adi escape from the issue at hand.
There was an awkward silence.
"I understand that you fear I may turn," Obi-Wan allowed, dropping the harsh edge from his voice. "I am a Shadow in your world of Light." His voice was so lost in that instant that Mace desperately wanted to call to him, tell him he need not plunge into the cold waters of his senses just to appease the Council.
"I face the Darkness and it reaches out to embrace me," Obi-Wan continued, unaware that all the masters where now looking upon him with regret; regret that his path had led him to this place. "I can feel its power as it brushes against my skin and my mind, but I will not turn."
"Because of the bond," Yaddle spoke for the fist time, once more being the voice of the Warrior's heart from within the Council.
"Yes, it binds me to the Light."
"Which is why we are anxious for its fulfilment," Mundi said, relieved to have found a point of understanding. "With the Chosen One in the order, we need you, Obi-Wan."
"I understand." As they had talked, and the Council clearly showed their remorse, Obi-Wan's posture had relaxed, but with his parting words his body was once more rigid with restrained energy. "But if you interfere again I will not be responsible. Remember who I am when you make plans concerning Qui-Gon and myself. You have waited ten years for this, you can wait a little longer."
And then he was gone again, into the living shadows. Yoda had not spoken since the meeting had begun, choosing to let others say what lay within their hearts, but he spoke now.
"Follow the Force Obi-Wan does; know, we cannot, what he sees in its ripples. Allow him time we must, no choice we have. Adjusting he is to being Jedi and Warrior. Time it will take."
The Council broke up then, each master leaving with thoughts of a future not yet revealed to them, until only Mace, Yaddle and Yoda remained.
"I have a feeling you left something unsaid, Master Yoda," Mace said without looking at the ancient Jedi, watching the other Jedi leave.
"Hmph."
"Left unsaid it was, what it is that will take time." But it was not Yoda who answered. It was Yaddle. "Time it will take for Obi-Wan to realise he cannot be both. He is the Warrior, that is all."
"Live in shadows he does, and must," Yoda continued. "Until war is upon us and known to all it must be that Death lives and fights for the Light."
The day that the relationship between the bondmates changed was like many of those before it. Qui-Gon divided his time between his own apprentice and classes for the initiates and other padawans. Obi-Wan had left that morning before he awoke and throughout the day he felt his distraction. Since their return there had been no time for them to reconnect, let alone create a new dimension to their relationship. Qui-Gon willingly allowed his old apprentice all the time he required to grow accustomed to the changes in their lives and in truth he was happy to be patient; Obi-Wan was not the only one to have changed in five years. They had both become accustomed to being alone and now the master found himself with a new apprentice and a potential lover.
They were both unsure how to more forward. The Force may have brought them together but it did not help the transition from long estranged friends into bondmates; that was something they would have to do alone.
Walking side by side, two highly respected Jedi discussed the bondmates, hoping to find a way to help those that they cared for.
"Obi-Wan won't let us interfere."
"Interfering we are not," Yoda told Mace. "Concerned we are, as friends, yes?"
"Yes, but I'm not sure that either of them trust us to be able to separate ourselves from our roles on the Council."
"Some success you have had with Obi-Wan, yes," Yoda reminded Mace. "Talk to him again you should, leave my grand-padawan to me you will."
"Yes, Master," Mace said, not really having any reason to object. In truth he want to speak to Obi-Wan again, as his friend, for he worried for the young Jedi and he wanted to make sure that all was well with him.
Yoda ambled off to find his difficult grand-padawan. Mace watched him go, thinking that he had the easier of the two bondmates; at least Qui-Gon would pretend to be civil. Mace walked slowly to the Blossom garden, knowing that at this time of day Obi-Wan would be sitting by his tree, meditating.
"Master, what can I do for you?" Qui-Gon asked the ancient master, surprised to find him waiting outside his classroom after his lesson had come to an end.
"Speak to you I would, as your master I wish, not as a Council member."
"You want to talk about the bond." Qui-Gon looked at the other master and saw only concern. "Walk with me back to my quarters?"
"I will," Yoda accepted the invitation, knowing it was the best he was going to get.
"Competed the bond you have not?"
"No," was Qui-Gon's short answer.
"Come to me you once did, when problems you had, here for you I am, if needed I am."
"I know that, Master," Qui-Gon said truthfully, glancing down at the other Jedi as they walked. "But in this instance I prefer to find my own way."
"Understand that I do." Yoda stopped walking, forcing Qui-Gon to do likewise. "But ask you to consider this I do; why delay do you? The Force's will is it? You hearts? Or some other reason?"
Qui-Gon nodded, not wanting to answer too hastily; if Yoda was asking these questions then there was more to it that the simple answer.
"Leave you now I will."
Qui-Gon watched Yoda shuffle off down a different corridor. He almost called him back. He almost said that he did not believe that there was not much longer to wait, Obi-Wan grew closer every day. But he did not, respected instead Obi-Wan's request to keep it between them, keeping at least that small part of their lives private.
"Don't say anything." Mace had decided that he would simply say what he had come to the garden to say and then leave, letting Obi-Wan think on his words alone, rather than having another argument that could turn their friendship bitter.
Obi-Wan opened his eyes and studied the Council member with interest. Mace was obviously worked up about something, and it amused Obi-Wan to know he was the cause.
"I can tell by your face that you find my frustration amusing, so I ask you this, Obi-Wan; why do you procrastinate over the bond? Is it really because you are unsure or is it because of some need to show your independence to the Council?" Mace paused only long enough to make sure his audience of one was listening. Obi-Wan was and he looked annoyed.
'Good,' part of Mace whispered.
"If it is the former, than feel reassured with the knowledge that every Jedi in the Order believes you and Qui-Gon belong together. If it is the latter, then don't you think you've punished us and tortured Qui-Gon enough?"
Mace did not wait for a response; he did not wait for the angry words he knew bubbled inside Obi-Wan's mind. Instead he stalked off, back to his office, leaving a slightly dazed Jedi in his wake.
After Mace disappeared from sight, Obi-Wan closed his eyes once more to meditate, however, Mace's words gave him something else to focus on.
Qui-Gon returned home from a day of lessons weary and in anticipation of a long soak in hot bath and then settling down for the evening with a book and a calming cup of tea. However, when he opened the door to his quarters he stopped dead in his tracks; all thoughts of his bath and book left his mind completely.
The lights were off, but the whole apartment was alight with the flame of candles, dozens of them, and the silvery light of the moon, which fell into the living room through the open balcony doors. A light breeze swept through the apartment bringing with it the aroma of roasted fowl. Standing at the balcony doors, as if he had just set foot into the common room from outside, was Obi-Wan, dressed in full Jedi garb: clean, crisp cream tunics and heavy robe.
"It occurred to me," Obi-Wan said, without greeting, "That I was avoiding us for all the wrong reasons."
"The wrong reasons?" Qui-Gon inquired, dimly aware of the door closing behind him, shutting out the extra light from the corridor.
"The Council. I did it to test them and, I am ashamed to say, to irritate them."
"You're only human, Obi-Wan," Qui-Gon reminded, feeling a little surer of himself.
"Nevertheless, I am sorry and I would like very much to have dinner with you tonight while I tell you of my plan." Obi-Wan tilted his head forward in polite invitation. "If you are so inclined."
"I'd be delighted," Qui-Gon answered, removing his cloak and making his way over to his old padawan. "You know what this sounds like to me, Obi-Wan?"
Obi-Wan shook his head, taking Qui-Gon's hand in his own when he was finally within reach.
"A date," Qui-Gon answered softly.
"Yes, I suppose it does, and in so saying, you have guessed my plan." Seeing Qui-Gon's quizzical look he smiled and said, "Come, sit, we shall eat and talk. I have asked Anakin to stay with Master Yoda tonight so that we will not be disturbed."
The two Jedi went to the table and Qui-Gon sat when he was gently pushed into one of the dining chairs. With a grin, Obi-Wan turned and disappeared into the kitchen only to appear a moment later carrying their dinner. They sat and ate together as they once had, speaking of unimportant things and finding comfort in the simple pleasure of each other's company, both coming to realise that despite the years gone by, they were as close as ever. Finally, Obi-Wan turned their conversation to what was lurking in both their minds.
"We have been friends a long time, have we not? We were friends before, weren't we, Qui-Gon, when I was your apprentice?"
"Of course, I've always considered you a dear friend, Obi-Wan."
"Good, and so I begin to think that just because we have known each other for more than a decade that there is no reason why we should not indulge in a little romance." Obi-Wan paused, waiting for Qui-Gon's agreement.
"You know me well, Obi-Wan. I may be an old Jedi who dwells too much on the living Force, but at heart I am also an old romantic." Qui-Gon reached out to touch Obi-Wan's face, turning more serious. "I do not know what to say to you, my own, to make this easier for you, for us both."
"You don't need to make this easier, Qui-Gon, it already is. I love you," Obi-Wan said leaning into Qui-Gon's touch. "I've dreamed of the soulbond since I was eighteen, hoping you'd love me in the same way that I love you."
"I do, Obi-Wan."
"So here is my plan: a romance. I have taken quarters in the Knight's wing, I'll stay there until we wish to move forward in our own time."
"I will not lie and say that I will be pleased to see you go, but I see the merit in your idea. The Council rushed us and I think we rushed ourselves, despite your display of reluctance to annoy the Council." Qui-Gon stopped for a moment just to look at his companion and thought he had never looked so beautiful, basking as he was in the warm glow of candlelight and in his contentment. "I love you."
"And I love you, so really there is little else to worry about."
"Anakin," Qui-Gon said, the single name saying more than any list of problems.
"You are his master, he knows that, Qui-Gon. The only people questioning the bond it would seem is us, and I include you here, Qui-Gon, it is not just me. You go against the Council so often that people expect it, but you have always followed the Force."
"As have you."
"As have I; we are meant to be, Qui-Gon."
Upon hearing Obi-Wan's words, Qui-Gon's heart filled with love and anticipation. He stood and reached out for Obi-Wan. Taking his hand, he pulled him up so that they stood with their bodies pressed up against each other. Obi-Wan's head was tilted back gently so that he could look Qui-Gon in the eye.
"Meant to be?" Qui-Gon whispered, his lips so close to Obi-Wan's that the younger man could feel his breath.
"Yes," he hissed out before Qui-Gon claimed his mouth.
The kiss was electric and arousal spread through them quickly, the bond hungering to be completed. Feelings held back for far too many years rushed forward, reaching outward to its twin in the other man. The soulbond joining them surged to life and became a living thing within the Force, an incandescent light shining from it even in its incomplete state.
Hearing some unheard cue, both men pulled back and smiled at each other.
"I should go," Obi-Wan said quietly.
"I'd like to ask you to stay, but my heart warns me that it is not yet time for that."
"Soon, my love." Obi-Wan pulled free and went to the door. He stopped and turned once more and smiled again at his master. "I will see you tomorrow."
"Yes," Qui-Gon replied, reluctant for the evening to end. "Obi-Wan, would you care to join me for a picnic tomorrow for midmeal?"
"I'd like that very much."
Obi-Wan left and Qui-Gon retired to his room for the night. In the morning Anakin returned to find his master washing the dishes from the night before, but despite the chore, the Jedi was smiling, and so seeing, the Jedi padawan also smiled, pleased that his master and his friend were finally on the right path.
Chapter 5
The Soulbond remained incomplete; it hummed between them like a living thing, but with their decision made and their certainty of direction, the bond settled into patience, its completion growing ever nearer as the two Jedi renewed old friendship and kindled new passions. They said nothing of their plans to the Council, their friends or Anakin, although it was clear to see by those who cared for the pair the growing strength of the bond. Friendship bloomed and it had always been this companionship that had been at the root of their love.
"Obi-Wan."
"Qui-Gon," Obi-Wan greeted in return upon finding Qui-Gon at his door for midday bell, as he had done so for the last cycle.
"I have come to collect you for lunch, I thought today a picnic in one of the gardens," Qui-Gon said, holding up a basket of food for Obi-Wan to see. The younger Jedi smiled.
"Give me two moments."
Obi-Wan disappeared back into his quarters only to return a moment later with his cloak and his own carrier.
"What's in there?" the master asked, trying to see into the basket without much success.
"You'll find out soon enough," Obi-Wan said as he stepped into the corridor allowing the door to his quarters to close. "Shall we go?"
The two Jedi strolled through the temple, occasionally stopping to greet friends that they passed and slowly they made their way to the Harmony Garden; they passed silently beneath the arching trees and over the wild grass that were wrapped in the living Force. They walked a good distance from the path, in a secluded part of the garden that they had come to think of as their spot. In the last cycle the couple had gone there often to eat, meditate or simply be together.
Obi-Wan watched now with some amusement as Qui-Gon spread out a blanket and then started to set out the food.
"Aren't you going to sit, Obi-Wan?" the master asked, glancing up.
"Yes," Obi-Wan replied a little distractedly as he slowly sat, crossing his legs, his faint smile lingering on his face.
It was not until he had finished his task that Qui-Gon noticed the smile.
"Obi-Wan?" he asked. "What makes you smile so?"
"Apologies, Qui-Gon, but I think my brain his having trouble with your romantic side." Qui-Gon looked a little hurt and Obi-Wan's hand shot out in order to take his master's hand in his own before the older man could retreat. "No, no, no, please do not take offence at my words, I did not mean them how they sounded. Force, it seems that my years away have robbed me of my diplomacy."
"The little amount I was able to instil in you perhaps," Qui-Gon teased lightly "How did you mean them, my love?" Qui-Gon asked, willing to listen to his love's explanation. He removed one of his hands from Obi-Wan's grasp and cupped the younger Jedi's face, stroking his thumb along beautifully pouted lips. With the caress, Obi-Wan sighed heavily, relaxing into the touch.
"I did not expect... I don't know." He smiled, somehow managing to look both happy and sad in the same moment. "I am just used to you as my master, I think. I've wanted this so long, Qui-Gon, imagined it for years, but all my memories of you are as my master."
"I know, my own, but I haven't been your master for a long time and you have been your own man for all that time, besides I thought that was the point of our patience," he said with a smile. "To make new memories."
"I know that, but this 'new' us..." Obi-Wan trailed off.
"Yes?" Qui-Gon prompted, allowing his hand to roam into Obi-Wan's thick hair.
"I like it," Obi-Wan whispered, his eyes dark with desire, unsure if he meant the caress or the new relationship.
"Good," Qui-Gon removed his hands, all too aware of his effect on his companion. "Shall we eat?"
Obi-Wan managed to hold in the less than complementary name, but Qui-Gon was sure he caught a whisper of it through the faint tethers of the bond and the look on Obi-Wan's eyes was enough to convince him he had heard right.
"Now, my Shadow"," Qui-Gon ignored the look, choosing to continue to tease his bondmate instead. "You must have patience, we have a plan, remembe?."
Obi-Wan smiled, but Qui-Gon did not see the glint of revenge in the younger man's eye. The picnic progressed and Obi-Wan more than got his own back as the two Jedi flirted, both enjoying every moment of it.
"Are you going to tell me what you brought?" Qui-Gon asked after they had finished their meal and packed the remains away.
"Of course, but first you must lie down." Qui-Gon looked puzzled, but did as he was asked. They moved around so that Qui-Gon lay flat with his head on Obi-Wan's lap, Obi-Wan's hands playing lazily in his master's hair. "Now close your eyes."
There was silence for a moment and Qui-Gon waited patiently for what ever it was Obi-Wan wished to say. When his old apprentice began to speak, his voice was soft and wistful.
"When I was away, living alone in the coldness of shadows and death, I had dreams, or perhaps fantasies. I dreamed of the sun, Qui-Gon, high in the sky, its radiant heat beating down upon me, warming my skin and my heart. I dreamed of the tranquillity of the Force when it is restful and undisturbed by the hatred I pursued. I dreamed of the temple as I remembered it as a child, not as I would see it upon my eventual return with the new eyes of the Shadow. Now, Qui-Gon, I see every Jedi's tenuous link to life, I see the fragility of mortality, but then Qui-Gon, when I was a child, alive with innocence, the temple was so different."
Qui-Gon opened his eyes to look up at Obi-Wan to see that he, too, had closed his eyes. The master took a moment to study his love, seeing the few lines of worry he had acquired in his five year absence, but ultimately the beloved face remained unchanged. Qui-Gon sank further into the moment, soothed by Obi-Wan's voice.
"Close your eyes, Qui-Gon," Obi-Wan whispered with an exhale of breath. Qui-Gon obeyed, being drawn into Obi-Wan's dream, seeing the temple as he had as a youth.
"Do you remember the temple as a child? The walls were alive, Qui-Gon, with possibilities and excitement, with joy, laughter and love. The children of the Jedi lead charmed lives, surrounded by people who care for them greatly. When I was young I felt so safe, so much so that I used to wander off exploring. It used to drive my caretakers to distraction."
Qui-Gon chuckled a little to hear of such an adventurous young Obi-Wan, knowing that the trait had not left the man the boy had grown up to be.
"I was restless, even then it seems.
"It took a very wise and ancient master to find a cure for my roving heart. Master Yoda began to take me with him whenever he visited the gardens. He, like you my love, despaired at my lack with the living Force, so one day he took me to the Garden of Blossoms and far in the back he placed a tiny young sapling in my hands.
'There young one,' he said. 'Plant this you will, care for it, then find a connection to the living Force you might, and this place as well.'
"Dutifully, I obeyed. I poured myself into that tree, Qui-Gon, and it has grown with me and although from thereafter when I wandered from the crèche, the masters knew where to find me. But I found no connection and the tree did not flower.
"On my thirteenth birthday, when I swore my loyalty to a Jedi master who agreed to take me as his padawan learner, the tree blossomed, for I had finally found my link to the Temple and the Order.
"Years passed and although the tree grew and blossomed every year it bore no fruit and it remained so, even as I was knighted five years ago.
"I have found my path, Qui-Gon, I've returned to my home and found the one I love, so this morning I went to my tree and found the ripest berries I have ever seen."
Qui-Gon felt something soft brush against his lips, a drop of juice fell into his slightly parted lips onto his tongue and he instinctively opened his lips further, allowing Obi-Wan to place the berry into his mouth. It was sweet and wonderfully juicy. Qui-Gon savoured every moment of the morsel before opening his eyes to look at Obi-Wan once more, who was smiling down at him.
"It seems that I have found my connection to the living Force, learning how to live in the moment while in the darkest places of the world."
"Indeed you have. I am very proud of you my padawan, and thank you for sharing this with me. I had no idea about the tree."
Obi-Wan smiled wider and bobbed his head in acknowledgment.
"May I have another berry, Obi-Wan?" Qui-Gon asked, drawing them both into the moment, enjoying their time together.
The other Jedi laughed.
"Yes, beloved. You can have as many as you wish."
The day moved on and both men knew they must go their separate ways. As they gathered up their belongings, Qui-Gon wrapped his arms around Obi-Wan's waist and brought him towards him.
"I cannot resist," he said before kissing Obi-Wan, forcing his tongue between pliant lips. He could taste the berries still upon Obi-Wan's lips. The couple had exchanged light kisses throughout the afternoon, but this kiss left them breathless and with passions aflame.
"Qui-Gon, Qui-Gon, wait," Obi-Wan managed to groan out, pushing the older man away. "Slow, we said slowly."
"I know, Obi-Wan, I apologise," Qui-Gon said stepping back, although he looked anything but sorry.
"It would seem neither of us can help ourselves. And we call ourselves Jedi."
They sighed and stepped further away from each other, taking a moment to regain their centres and control of their emotions.
"There is a film on tonight I would like to see. Go with me?" Obi-Wan tentatively asked.
"I would be delighted," Qui-Gon answered, once more the perfect image of a Jedi master. He watched Obi-Wan walk away. "It's only ourselves we are torturing, Obi-Wan," he said to a man no longer close enough to hear. "Only ourselves."
After leaving Qui-Gon, Obi-Wan did not return to his quarters. Instead he left the Temple and wandered out into the city. The day was growing short and he had no destination in mind, strolling instead among the crowds as though he had no care in the world. For a time he allowed himself to be Obi-Wan Kenobi, smiling at the memories of the past cycle and the promise of the evening. It was an indulgence and one he did not allow for long. From one step to the next, Obi-Wan became someone else, his stride became longer, more graceful, almost cat like; the gait of a hunter. From one step to the next he went from being a man in love to a man of shadows. His alternate self consumed him until he was fully immersed into the Force. His random wanderings became a sure path as he followed where the Force led.
"To the Senate again," he said to no one when he reached his apparent destination. Every time he had tried to find the taint within Coruscant's air he had ended up at the Senate building. Once he had tried to follow the trail inside, but had become lost in its echoes that flowed through every corridor. It was inescapable in the building, but with no real source.
"I wish I knew what this meant."
"Found something you have?"
"No," Obi-Wan said, emerging from the shadows that dusk had created in the Council chamber.
"Been waiting for you I have, expected you I did," Yoda said, however he added nothing more.
"Why?" Obi-Wan asked, at once suspicious.
"We have sensed things, Knight Kenobi." Mace Windu stepped forward, also coming out of the concealing shadows.
Both Council members saw their Warrior start at his sudden appearance, apparently surprised by his presence. Briefly, memories of Obi-Wan doing the same to the Council flitted across Mace's mind, before he, like Yoda, became concerned by Obi-Wan's distraction.
"What is it Obi-Wan?" Mace asked. Usually it was Yaddle that spoke for the heart of the Warrior, however she was not there. Mace had always allowed the ancient master to speak to Obi-Wan of personal things within the Council chamber, falling back on his duty and role as a Council member, but the part of him that was Obi-Wan's friend was sad that there was this distance between them now. For the first time it seemed, he was able to be the one to aid his friend.
"I cannot explain. I do not know if it is Qui-Gon that distracts me or the danger I sense." The Warrior looked troubled as he spoke. "I become lost within my own mind and the things that only I can perceive."
"Perhaps it is both these things, Obi-Wan," Mace offered. "This is the first time that you have had to face both your roles at once, finding balance will be difficult."
"Yes." Obi-Wan still seemed distracted as he once again melted into shadow.
"Time is running out."
"Ready he will be, grasp what is needed of him he will. Time for the bond there still is, allow this love to be completed the Force will."
"You look awfully pleased with yourself, what's going on?" Bant asked her friend as he helped her move some of her furniture around. She had decided it was time to take on a padawan learner and needed to clean out the second bedroom. Since he arrived, Obi-Wan had been smiling and humming faintly to himself, his aura glowed with joy and Bant was sure she was not imagining the bounce in his step.
"Nothing, or at least nothing different." After leaving Yoda and Mace to their own worries, Obi-Wan had released his own fears to the Force, thinking on memories of his afternoon with Qui-Gon and the picnic they had shared. By the time he reached Bant's quarters he was abuzz with anticipation for their evening date.
"Uh huh," was all she said, choosing instead to glare at him until he confessed what ever it was that had caused his good mood. Obi-Wan continued to pack away books and other odds and ends, seemingly oblivious to her glare.
"Do you want this?" he waved an ugly vase that some king or other had given her. He did not even look up as he asked.
"Obi-Wan!"
Startled, Obi-Wan looked up, surprise clearly written on his face. Bant could tell his oblivious act was genuine, he really was not fully with her in the here and now. Bant did not bother asking again, she continued to stare at him, knowing now that he could see her displeased look he would quickly talk.
Obi-Wan went back over the brief conversation that he had not really been paying attention to in his mind. The annoyed and expectant look on his friend's face told him he was not going to get away with a vague remark.
"Honestly, Bant, nothing is different. But I guess for the first time I think Qui-Gon and I are doing the right thing."
"For the first time? Honestly, Obi-Wan you both over think things. Get with the program and realise what the rest of the Temple realised years ago." She grinned, taking any sting out of her words. "So, are you going to complete the bond then?"
"Soon," was all Obi-Wan would say.
"Obi-Wan, that was without doubt the worst film I have ever seen," Qui-Gon moaned, good naturedly as he and Obi-Wan made their way back to his quarters. The master was suddenly reminded of earlier times when Obi-Wan had still been his apprentice, but old enough to be more of an equal, when they had become friends and Obi-Wan had become confident enough to argue with his master.
"How can you say that? It was... cool."
Qui-Gon stopped dead in the corridor.
"You've been spending too much time with Anakin."
"Ha ha." Obi-Wan had not stopped when Qui-Gon had and continued down the corridor with obvious amusement. Qui-Gon began walking again, lengthening his stride to catch up with his companion.
"I have enjoyed this evening." The Jedi master's tone was filled with contentment.
"So did I; more and more it feels like old times."
Qui-Gon was unsurprised to hear that Obi-Wan's thoughts matched his own. While they disagreed, often passionately, about many things, they each fit into each other's thoughts and minds with ease.
"Not just like old times," Qui-Gon reminded him, ducking in to give Obi-Wan a brief brush of lips against his cheek.
"No, not quite," Obi-Wan agreed, pleased by his master's playful nature.
They reached the master's door and both stood awkwardly for a moment, but only for a moment.
"Come in for coffee, Obi-Wan."
"Yes," was the answer without pause for hesitant thoughts.
The lights were off in the apartment, but there was enough light streaming though the windows to see by. Qui-Gon reached out to take Obi-Wan's cloak for him, but as he did so their hands brushed. Obi-Wan let out a moan laden with desire. Qui-Gon, hearing the moan, abandoned his own self control and swept up the smaller man into an enflaming kiss, pushing him back until Obi-Wan's back connected with the wall.
"Force, Qui-Gon," Obi-Wan managed to get out before once again his mouth was claimed. "Qui-Gon, please."
"Don't ask me to stop, Obi-Wan, we have been patient enough."
"I had no intention, beloved. I was going to say, take me to bed," Obi-Wan told his soulmate, showing all his hunger within his eyes and cast out along the gossamer threats of the incomplete bond, finding Qui-Gon's matching hunger at the other end. Obi-Wan slid around Qui-Gon's greater frame, he walked backwards, further into the apartment, all the while gazing at his companion, sending waves of desire to him through the bond. Qui-Gon followed so closely that they never lost contact for a moment. They kissed and fumbled their way to the master bedroom.
Once the door was shut between them and the living area there was no hesitation. Control was abandoned, clothes were shed and the two men fell into the bed together, exploring the fully revealed flesh for the first time. Words of love were uttered between kisses and through the growing bond. They could feel it growing within them, gaining strength, insistent for its completion. There was no time for slow and gentle as years of denial spilled over into breathless moans and desperate hands. Qui-Gon climaxed inside Obi-Wan, Obi-Wan following shortly after. The bond snapped into place, fully formed, complete and immovable.
The hum in the Force that had been a song to their ears reached a crescendo before dying down and becoming part of the greater whole of the Force, forever sung within it, but no longer a distraction or an urgent message. The Force rippled out from them as they slept and those powerful and knowledgeable enough to feel it knew what it meant. The Force was celebrating a joining made in love. The Temple slept peacefully that night; most not realising that their contentment was given to them by the Light.
Although night had long since fallen, there remained at the back of the Garden of Blossoms a lone figure, meditating under a tree resplendent with the Living Force and amply bestowed with ripening fruit. In the Temple and in the surrounding city, beings slept, played, fought and love, then quietly at first, a song reached the figure's ears, buried deep with the tides of the Force. It lapped around her, carrying with it the stirring of a Light stronger than any Dark.
Like a star gone nova, the song exploded around the lone Jedi, weaving in and around the living things of the garden. Great joy and contentment eased into all the souls who dwelt within the Temple. As the song faded back to where it had come, the lingering joy did not, it permeated everything as the Force rejoiced at the final conclusion of its intent. Most could not hear the song, even those attuned to the Force, but they did feel its effects. None ever learnt where the blanket of well-being that fell upon them came from, however they all slept peacefully.
Deep within the Garden of Blossoms, Master Yaddle smiled, knowing the heart of the Shadowed Warrior was filled, even if it would only last for the briefest of moments. Duty beckoned, to all Jedi, but she, more than most, understood the turmoil and longing that had dwelt within the Warrior's heart, for it had been nearly a decade since he had discovered the uncompleted bond.
"Pleased you look," a voice said from the darkness.
"Master Yoda," she said by way of greeting.
"Pleased we should all be." Yoda slowly made his way over to the other Council member. "But last it will not."
"No, but longed for this moment Obi-Wan has. Have tonight at least he does."
"Sure of this I am not," Yoda looked at Yaddle's curious face. "Restless he already is."
Elsewhere, away from the tranquillity of the Jedi Temple, another stirred, awoken by the change within the currents of the Force. For the Force was transformed, so minutely that it was almost undetectable, except to those waiting for change. The man awoke and did not know what it was that he felt, but knew one thing, it was of the Light side of the Force; it was his enemy. The Darkness swept around him, but no longer did he feel as safe has he had, for the Light felt stronger. In the chambers of the Chancellor, deep within the most malevolent of hearts, the first stirrings of fear were felt.
Chapter 6
Obi-Wan woke before dawn's light could touch the horizon. He opened his eyes to see the city beyond the window still cloaked in darkness. He gazed into the night and felt oddly comforted by its presence. He drifted in this feeling for a time, enjoying his moment of peace. He sank further into the darkness of night only to brush against another kind of Darkness. Hidden in the folds of the Force, Obi-Wan once again felt the Darkness that persisted in lingering over the capital. He tried to follow it, but it was as a phantom; immaterial and lacking any substance for him to grab hold of.
It was looking for him now though, searching for the source of the change in the currents of the Force.
"Good," he whispered to it. "Know that I am here."
"Obi-Wan?"
The young Jedi turned his head to see Qui-Gon lying on his side, head propped up on one arm, gazing at him through the darkness as he had been gazing out over the cityscape.
"I'm sorry, Qui-Gon, I did not mean to wake you."
"It was not your words that woke me, but your silence here," he tapped his temple. "You disappeared Obi-Wan, retreated from the bond."
"I was distracted by something."
"I understand that you must shield yourself from me at times, my Shadow, but not tonight."
"I'm sorry," Obi-Wan repeated his apology.
"Sh, my love." Qui-Gon leant forward and kissed his soul mate gently. "It matters not now."
Obi-Wan surrendered to the kiss, burying his hands in his lover's thick mane of silver hair, pulling him closer until the larger man lay atop him.
"Qui-Gon, love me please." There was a desperation in his voice and for an instant Qui-Gon felt it too, knowing that their time together was fast running out.
The Jedi Master trailed his fingers over the hard muscle beneath him, his feather light touch causing a groan to escape Obi-Wan's lips. His mouth followed their path, sucking and biting gently as he moved down Obi-Wan's body. He took his time, learning the contours of his lover's body, as he had been unable to earlier in their haste. He noted every mark, every mole and every scar, those from Obi-Wan's apprenticeship mixed in with news ones, all with their own unique story. He lavished attention on the velvety smooth skin and delighted to hear the moans and gasps for breath that he managed to entice from his bond mate.
"You're beautiful, my own," he breathed out between kisses. "More so than I ever imagined."
The Jedi master ignored Obi-Wan's straining erection, carrying on his investigation of the young supple body all they way down to his toes.
"Force, Qui-Gon, what you do to me," Qui-Gon heard above him as he retraced his journey back up one leg. This time when he reached Obi-Wan's penis he did not ignore it. His tongue flicked out causing a startled groan from his lover. He gently blew on the moisture left behind by his tongue and smiled wickedly at feeling Obi-Wan tremble beneath him. He moved forward and this time took Obi-Wan's length into his mouth.
The Jedi savoured the feeling of tasting his lover for the first time, drawing out the moment as long as he was able. He stroked Obi-Wan's thigh with one hand while the other inched beneath the gently writhing man to stroke lightly over his entrance.
"Oh, stars."
There was no doubt about Obi-Wan's tenuous control, he was fast descending towards orgasm, but Qui-Gon was not done with him yet. He once more kissed his way up Obi-Wan chest, forestalling any word of protest from his lover by carefully inserting his finger into Obi-Wan's anus. The loud, desire filled moan that this enticed was almost enough to send Qui-Gon into his own oblivion, however he was not a Master for nothing.
"Obi-Wan," he gasped, allowing that to slip past his control. "Tell me what you want, my love."
"Damn it, Qui-Gon, you know what I want." Obi-Wan rose up slightly from the bed, shifting, trying to impale himself further on Qui-Gon's finger. "Please, don't make me beg."
Qui-Gon did not waste time in pointing out to his lover that he was already begging, however he complied with the demand. He reached out for the oil they had used only hours earlier, coating himself with the sweet smelling fragrance. Obi-Wan was still loose from their earlier activity, but the Jedi master had no desire to hurt his young lover and so took his time in preparing Obi-Wan. Finally, for it seemed a lifetime to the knight, Qui-Gon was happy with his preparations and positioned himself at Obi-Wan's entrance.
"Are you ready, love?"
"More than, please... please...please." Obi-Wan's words dissolved into a mindless stream of nonsense as he at long last got his desire. Qui-Gon pushed into him and both men could not help but gasp and moan with their joining. They moved together, already in perfect sync with each other, body to body, mind to mind and heart to heart. They came together for the second time that night, releasing themselves to the bond that lay between them, binding them.
"It's an insult and disrespectful," insisted Mundi. "They were obliged to inform us if they intended to bond."
Morning had come to the Temple and with it so did politics and duty. The Council met, all knowing the events of the previous evening.
It was Yoda's soft chuckle that drifted over Mundi's angry words and not murmurs of agreement.
"Knew we all did what they intended, blind not to see we would have been."
"Still..." Mundi tried again, not mollified at Yoda's soft rebuke.
"Peace, Councillor," Mace interrupted, not wanting to have another debate on the impetuous nature of a certain Jedi Warrior. The Force had chosen and no argument was going to change who their Shadow was. "They deserve this time to be together without the scrutiny of the Temple bearing down upon them. Both of them have always followed the Force and I trust them both to 'inform' the Council in due time. The Force separated them for five years, and when the Shadow leaves again it could be for another five years. Will you begrudge them this time granted to them?"
Mundi shook his head, silenced finally by compassion for lovers kept apart for too long.
"Difficult road lies ahead of them I see, wise it would be to let them walk it unhurried." Yoda nodded to himself as he saw something only he could see. "Time, time is a treacherous thing; betray you it can by passing too quickly and too slowly. Treasure this time, we all should."
Morning found the lovers in blissful contentment even though both knew it could not stay so for long as both had things they must attend to.
"I am teaching philosophy this morning with the first year apprentices," Qui-Gon told Obi-Wan as he dressed for the day.
'Lucky first years,' Obi-Wan thought, although not quietly enough because the other Jedi heard him through the bond
"Does that mean you want to join us?" he inquired, ignoring the sarcasm that had laced Obi-Wan's mind voice.
Obi-Wan gave Qui-Gon a look that the master interpreted to mean he was not being funny.
'Especially considering the hour of the morning.' Was the thought that closely followed from the other side of the bond.
"We are Jedi, Padawan," Qui-Gon reminded his lover, enjoying the argument, the same argument that they had had for years before Obi-Wan had been knighted. "We can not stay in bed all day."
"I bet I could find a way to convince you to stay." Obi-Wan had the look of the Sith in his eye, the one that told the master his old padawan was up to mischief. He decided to pretend he had not seen it and ignore the comment, another characteristic left from Obi-Wan's apprenticeship.
"Anakin has sabre drills with his class as well."
'Spoil sport,' Obi-Wan thought at him as he too dressed, forced to put on his tunics from the previous night.
"I'm going to go back to my quarters for some clean clothes."
"While you are there you could pack your things and move them back here," Qui-Gon suggested casually, pausing to see Obi-Wan's reaction.
"Of course."
It seemed to be a morning of old behaviour, and Qui-Gon should have known that Obi-Wan would surprise him; it was an annoying habit that also remained.
"Is that all?" he asked, slightly incredulous at Obi-Wan's apparent indifference to the sudden change within their lives.
"We said it was temporary for me to live elsewhere."
"Yes." Qui-Gon could not think of anything else to say.
The knight, who had finished dressing, flashed him a wicked grin.
"You should be kind to your old master."
"I am kind to you, Master." Obi-Wan moved to stand by his bondmate, his hand snaked up over the master's broad chest and up behind his neck so that he could pull the taller man down for a sweet, slow, morning kiss. "Things would soon become boring if I did everything you expected."
"True," the older man conceded, holding Obi-Wan to him for a hug.
"And if it makes you feel any better, your habit of being cryptic still frustrates me." Merriment and the tingle of humour flowed over the bond, which met Qui-Gon's own amusement as he remembered the conversation on the ship from Naboo.
"You said you missed my cryptic words."
"I did, doesn't mean that it isn't annoying."
The Jedi master stared at his young love and was once again struck by the joy he felt at having his apprentice returned to him, back in his life and his mind.
"No more than I."
Qui-Gon looked puzzled at Obi-Wan's apparent non-sequencer words.
"No more joyful than I to be back in your life... and mind, Master."
"And you say I'm cryptic," he said and kissed the source of his joy on the mouth. "I am happy to be with you, Obi-Wan."
Before he could speak further, Qui-Gon was interrupted by a query through a different bond, the training bond he shared with Anakin.
"I must go," he said, having no need to explain further, knowing Obi-Wan had felt the padawan's presence through the soulbond.
"I will see you later, beloved."
"I love you, my own, my Obi-Wan."
Obi-Wan returned to his temporary quarters to change. He packed up his few belongings and had them moved to his master's quarters by a droid. The Warrior was restless with inaction, he had never been one to remain still long, even as a child, and as an adult and defender of the Jedi he had never been idle. The Darkness lurked, it was true, yet the Force was not calling him to it; it remained out of reach of his questioning sense.
He went to his workbench where his two lightsabres rested. He had only just finished the replacement for the one lost on Naboo. He had tested it the previous evening, but had not tried it while fighting. The other sabre, which sat so innocently next to it, was something entirely different. It was longer, sleeker somehow and emanated a sense of history. It was the sabre of the Warrior Jedi and had been carried by countless Jedi before him. He brushed a finger against the cool casing, seeing brief flashes of battles centres old, fought by all those gone before. With this lightsabre he was linked to all those who had carried the burden before him; it was an honour, but it was also daunting.
Obi-Wan had carried the weapon with him since he had clamed it as his own five years ago, but he had never used it. In all his time alone in the galaxy he had never reached for it and its reassuring memories of battle. He had always used his old 'sabre, and now he had built a new one, still not ready to wear the mantle of his responsibility.
'It's one thing to do your duty, another thing entirely to advertise it to everyone.' Which was the other reason why he had yet to fully claim the sword; other than his own personal hesitation, was the quiet whisperings in the Force that counselled discretion and subterfuge. Returning to Coruscant and finding such an obvious taint to the planet, that the other Jedi seemed totally unaware of, only reinforced his conviction that it was not time to claim his right; corruption was everywhere and at times it seemed unclear who could be trusted.
'Except Qui-Gon, he can be trusted.' He was thankful for the whispered voice in his mind, smiling at the memory of the night before and the new feeling of the completed bond.
Obi-Wan reached out for the new lightsabre, feeling its familiar weight in his hand. He smiled. When he had been a padawan at moments like this, moments of barely constrained energy, there was only one place he would go. He grabbed the second sabre, securing it in the pack he rarely left behind, and his cloak and left the empty rooms heading for the great arena and the training halls. The Shadow grinned at the thought, for he knew exactly what he was going to do with his morning, and in truth it had been far too long.
"You look pretty good for a dead guy."
"Siri," Obi-Wan greeted casually, as though his friend had not thought him dead for the last five years. "You are looking well."
"Don't be like that, Obi-Wan." Siri clearly looked angry. "Tell me what happened."
Obi-Wan looked longingly at the training area and sighed, he could see the he would have to wait for a space to open up anyway, so he may as well spend time with an old friend, once more repeating lies that he had the Council had agreed on.
"I was on a mission for the Council on the rim," he explained, "My ship was attacked and I was captured, injured. I escaped, but was stranded and unable to contact the Temple."
"For five years?"
"More or less."
The two young knights stared at each other for a while, neither willing to concede. Obi-Wan knew he would win, he had the advantage of patience taught to him in his time as predator to those who would threaten the Jedi.
"Fine, keep your secrets."
Obi-Wan could see in the vibrant young woman who stood before him that time had done nothing to temper her passion, nor had knighthood it seemed.
"Not all things are the business of others, Siri, and not all things that happen on missions are the business of other Jedi."
Siri seemed to accept this as an explanation. She seemed not to notice Obi-Wan's gentle rebuke and if she did she did not find anything odd about it.
'Perhaps,' Obi-Wan wondered, 'the other Jedi can sense part of what lies within me and respond to it.'
The conversation turned to other matters, including Qui-Gon's new padawan and Siri's desire to take on one of her own, but Obi-Wan did not find it as easy to relax around the other Jedi as he did around his dear friend Bant. She told Obi-Wan some of what had happened in his absence, and Obi-Wan was willing to listen, even if he was fully aware of the Temple goings on in his absence.
After a time a space opened up on the floor and Obi-Wan gratefully bid Siri good day.
"Don't you want to spar?" she teased. "Afraid you are rusty?"
"Another time, perhaps." He smiled at her in fond affection, remembering all the times they had clashed as children and all the times she had been there for him. Obi-Wan had missed Qui-Gon, as he was part of his heart, but it was Bant and Siri that made the young knight realise how much he had missed the other Jedi and how relieved he was to once more stand among them. As he left her side he said over his shoulder, "Congratulations."
"For what?"
"Your knighthood," he replied and then he was gone, joining in the flow of Jedi training and exercising.
He discarded his cloak and outer tunics in order to move more freely and then began some warm ups. He used the time to adjust his senses to the arena, so full of Jedi, each with their own distinctive aura and each connected to Obi-Wan, buried deep beneath the layers of the Force most Jedi could sense. When he was ready in body as well as mind, he ignited the new lightsabre, blue just like the one before. He flew seamlessly through the first forms until he settled on a kata that best suited his mood.
The Night Kata, a kata of flickering shadows and doubt, was a form learnt only by the most skilled swordsman, not for its difficulty, although its dazzling jumps and flips could put the most confident of padawans off, but because of the lost tale it seemed to tell. It was a kata of sorrow, breathtakingly beautiful and both painful and joyous to watch. Few knew the tale that the kata told, for only long hours of reading in the Temple archives would have revealed the mysterious dance's origins. Obi-Wan knew, and he had not needed to go looking, for he had known the moment he saw it, the moment he performed it, the moment he felt it, what the kata was telling its audience.
The Night Kata was the tale of the Shadow Jedi, protectors and warriors, assassins and killers, who it seemed, were all doomed to die as they live; in fierce combat, fighting for those they guarded.
Obi-Wan disappeared into the Force and immersed himself in the feeling of battle he could always sense. He lost his identity to it, becoming a weapon from within. He took some comfort that at least here he could be seen, that he could perform the dance of the dead Warriors for those who never saw them, only ever sensing their quiet passing as they delivered them from death.
The Jedi that were closest to Obi-Wan stopped their own exercises to watch the magnificent display. Masters stopped their apprentices to watch, drawing their attention to the detail with which the form was performed. The other Jedi watched and saw one of their own at one with the Force. They all smiled to see such a display, despite the innate sadness of the performance. They all smiled, except one.
Anakin watched with his class; he saw the sadness and grief in the lines of Obi-Wan's body as he told the silent story of the Night, but he was not awed by what he saw. Once more he was gripped by fear, terror even, of the man who was bonded so intimately with his master. Most of the time he could forget what Obi-Wan was but other times, like now, he saw all too clearly the danger that lay at the heart of the Jedi's Shadow.
The Kata came to an end and Obi-Wan stopped. He was staring straight at Anakin. The young apprentice felt the gaze sweep though him, seeing what he could not fathom. Then the intense regard was gone and Obi-Wan left the training area without looking back.
We must tell the Council tomorrow, Obi-Wan."
"Hmmm," was the only response Qui-Gon received. He looked at his bondmate and saw worry lines around his eyes and a deep frown upon his brow.
"Obi-Wan?"
"Sorry, Qui-Gon, I was light years away."
"We must inform the Council of the bond, Obi-Wan," Qui-Gon repeated himself, choosing not to call Obi-Wan on his distraction just yet, fearing that it was the need of another that drew his lover away from him.
"Yes, of course." Qui-Gon joined Obi-Wan on the large double bed, relishing the ease with which Obi-Wan reoccupied his life. 'Although they'd have to be blind and stupid not to already see it.'
Obi-Wan smirked.
The master caught the fleeting thought that flitted across Obi-Wan's mind.
"They are not stupid, Obi-Wan, they are the wisest of our order," he reminded the young man as he lay down in the bed. Obi-Wan sat up at his side. "Even if they do not always appear so."
That caused Obi-Wan to snort in amusement; he was not the only Jedi to have clashed with the Council and was all too familiar with Qui-Gon's history with the Council. The man had made a career of going against their collective wishes.
"All the same though," Qui-Gon continued. "We must tell them, it is only right."
"I wasn't arguing, Qui-Gon," Obi-Wan pointed out, as he snuggled down into the bed and Qui-Gon's warmth. "I just like messing with their minds."
"Why?" Qui-Gon's hand made lazy circles on Obi-Wan's back as he held the smaller man in his arms.
"Something to do?" Obi-Wan stretched into Qui-Gon's touch. "I think they need someone to make sure they do not become too dissociated from the Jedi in the field. I argue with them for that reason, just as you argue with them for the sake of the Force over their concern with politics."
Both were silent for a time, enjoying their time together.
"That feels nice."
"What, this?" Qui-Gon repeated the caress to Obi-Wan's back and chuckled at the semi-purr he received.
"Is it time for bed now, Master?"
"Soon, but I had plans for you first." So saying, he leant forward to kiss Obi-Wan, only to be met halfway by his very willing bed mate.
After night had long since crept upon them, Qui-Gon lay sleeping in a deep dreamless sleep, however Obi-Wan once again lay awake, staring at the night-time city. His thoughts dwelled on what he had felt at the end of his training session. He had thought of nothing else since; it was what he had been thinking about when Qui-Gon had brought up the bond and the Council, until Qui-Gon had managed to distract him with a few hours of tender love making.
The boy felt fear, that much was obvious, however he had seemed to be terrified of Obi-Wan, terrified beyond all logic or reason. Why then did he stir up such fear in the child?
'Why?'
'Because you are dangerous,' the part of him that was nothing but shadow whispered in his mind. 'The boy is right to fear you, you are vengeance and justice concealed in death.'
'He can see what you are.' The last was almost a taunt.
Obi-Wan did not sleep that night, not a moment did his mind rest, unconvinced that the shadow voice was wholly correct.
Chapter 7
"Masters, we respectfully come to you, to ask your permission to bond."
Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan stood together, side by side, before the Council, ready to publicly acknowledge their bond.
"Finally decided you have?"
"Yes, Master," Qui-Gon answered.
Since their arrival, Obi-Wan had not said a word; he stood beside Qui-Gon, his posture stiff, staring forward. Beyond his initial bow to the Council upon their arrival, he had not acknowledged a single member of the gathered masters, instead looking out past them at a sky busy with ships and transports. He looked, Qui-Gon thought, thoroughly uncomfortable.
"What do you say, Knight Kenobi?"
The question directed specifically to him did break Obi-Wan's silence, however it did nothing to loosen his posture.
"My heart desires that I be bonded to Master Jinn," Obi-Wan answered coolly.
"Troubled your mind is." Yaddle spoke for the Council now. She had always been the voice of the Warrior's heart, and for that the Jedi's protector held her in high regard. "Willingly you do this, gladly, but still reluctant you seem."
Qui-Gon watched, almost feeling like an outside observer, as the Council all looked to Yaddle and then back to Obi-Wan, waiting. Obi-Wan seemed to sag, not under their scrutiny, but under Yaddle's.
"This feels right, Master Yaddle. Indeed both my heart and the Force sings with it."
"Hear it we do, Obi-Wan."
"But this," Obi-Wan gestured about him to the midday sun streaming through the windows and to standing at Qui-Gon's side. "This seems wrong."
"Find answers you will, time it will take."
Obi-Wan gave a little smile of acknowledgment.
"Have you told your apprentice, Qui-Gon?"
Qui-Gon thought of the earlier conversation he had had with his padawan and saw Obi-Wan almost wince beside him as he recalled the memory.
The two Jedi had risen early, together, but not early enough. They had left Qui-Gon's bedroom to find Anakin already up and preparing first meal for all three of them.
"Morning Master, Obi-Wan," he greeted them cheerfully.
'Almost too cheerfully, considering the hour.'
Qui-Gon chuckled at his lover's scowl. He remembered Obi-Wan's suspicion of anyone voluntarily getting up before tenth hour and people who seemed happy about it were undoubtedly Sith born. It seemed five years of hard life, fighting, running and killing had not changed his beloved's mind on the matter.
"Anakin," Qui-Gon greeted and Obi-Wan grumbled and headed straight for the brewing java. Anakin did not seem to take offence to Obi-Wan's unintelligible and less than friendly greeting; the boy was already used to the young knight's strange behaviour.
'Strange?'
'Especially in the mornings, my Obi-Wan.'
Qui-Gon was once again treated to an irritated humph, this time both through the bond and verbally.
"Padawan, we should talk now," he said to his new apprentice. Qui-Gon thought he heard a growl from Obi-Wan over the bond as he spoke to his apprentice.
'So soon?'
"Sure Master, but I have to be at my physics lecture in an hour."
"I do not think this will take that long, Anakin," he went to the dining table and pulled out a chair for Anakin. "Please, sit."
Qui-Gon waited for his second companion to join them at the table. When he did not, he turned to the younger man and said, "Obi-Wan?"
"Yes, Master?" he answered, his voice innocent in its naiveté.
Qui-Gon indicated one of the spare chairs. He did not order Obi-Wan to sit, but was fully prepared to if his bondmate continued to try and avoid the conversation. This time Qui-Gon knew he heard a growl, but Obi-Wan sat down nonetheless.
"Anakin, later today Obi-Wan and I intend to go before the Council and ask their permission to bond."
"A bit late for that, isn't it Master?"
Qui-Gon was sure that if Obi-Wan had been fully awake and in better control he would have been better at controlling his blush; as it was, the knight turned an interesting shade of red. The master was so distracted by the phenomenon he could think of nothing in answer to Anakin's question.
'You're already a bad influence on him, my love, you've already infected him with your sense of humour.'
The blush deepened as Obi-Wan, too, remembered that when Qui-Gon had told him they would go before the Council he had said much the same thing as the boy.
"Master?"
"Obi-Wan's and my bond was created by the Force, but still we need the Council to recognise the bond and stand witness to it. I, we, would have liked you to have been a witness Anakin, but you are too young. We hope you will attend the ceremony though."
"Of course, it'll be cool."
It had been as easy as that for Anakin to accept what Obi-Wan and Qui-Gon had become to each other. Although Qui-Gon suspected that while he was only beginning to realise what he and his old apprentice had always been to each other, others had seen it from the beginning, including a young, gifted slave boy.
"Anakin knows and has given his blessing."
'In his way,' he added silently to his bondmate.
'Whose 'way' would you prefer?' was the immediate reply.
"The Council, too, give you blessings, conduct the ceremony we will, bear witness to your bond we shall."
"Thank you, Masters," the two Jedi said together. They bowed low in unison also and departed from the chamber.
"Worried I am," Yaddle said as they left, her gaze seeming to linger after them, though they had long moved out of sight.
"Why?" Mace asked her, a little puzzled.
"Still not realised, Obi-Wan has, how this bond will change the way he performs his duties."
"What will change?"
"Nothing, which is what he cannot comprehend."
The gardens were beautiful, they always were, but today they blossomed under the joy of the gathered, smiling, laughing Jedi who stood in attendance to witness the bonding of Qui-Gon Jinn and Obi-Wan Kenobi. The ceremony could have been held anywhere the pair wished, and if Obi-Wan was honest, he would have preferred somewhere quiet and secluded with only the minimal of people in attendance. This was not to be.
The young knight looked behind him to the gathered knights and masters and managed to not roll his eyes at their obvious delight. He and his master had gained reputations throughout the Temple and there had always been much speculation on the nature of their relationship.
'I suspect a few people are collecting on some bets today, my Obi-Wan.'
Obi-Wan returned his attention to the man who stood before him. He could not help but smile when he saw the joy that lay deep within sky blue eyes. He remembered, not so long ago, believing he would never be able to fall into them again, let alone stand before the Order and declare his love.
'I'm sorry, Qui-Gon, after so long away from them all, I'm finding their scrutiny a little difficult to adjust to.'
Qui-Gon did not say anything; he just looked at his young lover. Obi-Wan felt his regard, felt the steadiness of it and the unwavering belief in him that lay beyond it. It anchored him more to the moment that any words that Qui-Gon could have spoken.
"Listen and repeat the vows you must, if bonded you wish to be."
Gentle laughter washed over them from the witnesses. Qui-Gon did not hurry him though; Obi-Wan knew that his old master would wait all day and night if that was what he needed.
"I, Obi-Wan Kenobi, pledge myself to you. My life is yours, as is my heart. I join my soul to you in front of witnesses so that all may know that I am yours and you are mine."
Qui-Gon's pleasure grew with every word spoken by his love. He had lost this man to death five years ago and now here they stood. Life had retaken them and love had been allowed to flourish. For a moment the Jedi master allowed the song of the Force to wash over him and fill him. The sound was a constant companion to him now. Before he had known what it was, it had been a distraction; now that he knew what it was, the rejoicing of the Force at such pure love, its presence was wholly a comfort.
"I, Qui-Gon Jinn, pledge myself to you. My life is yours, as is my heart. I join my soul to you in front of witnesses so that all may know that I am yours and you are mine."
The ceremony was simple and brief, but the feelings behind it were anything but. As the two Jedi stood bathed in their love for each other, the gathered Jedi stepped forward to offer their congratulations.
'This reminds me of something,' Obi-Wan whispered though the bond.
'I'm not surprised, although the last time this happened you went on your first mission and ended up dead.'
There was silence at the other end of the bond.
'Obi-Wan?'
'I was just remembering. Hardly seems so long ago and yet I feel as if I have lived a lifetime.'
'Perhaps you have.'
There were a few curious questions about Obi-Wan's disappearance, however the life of a Jedi was a perilous one and few saw or felt any strangeness in the knight's return.
'Where's Anakin?'
'I think Bant took it upon herself to look after him so we could enjoy our bonding properly.'
'Think we should tell her we've already completed the bond?'
"Are you kidding?" Obi-Wan asked aloud, surprising Mace who was in the middle of giving them yet another lecture. "Besides I think she's enjoying being on the other side of playing confuse-a-padawan."
Obi-Wan gave a mischievous grin before asking.
'Do you think anyone would notice if we left now?'
'Yes,' Qui-Gon said smiling at another well-wisher. Obi-Wan pouted beside him. 'That doesn't mean I think we should stay.'
So saying, he pulled Obi-Wan to him in a bruising kiss. He broke off just as quickly as he had struck, leaving the younger man gasping. The master looked at the other Jedi gathered and said, "Excuse us."
He pulled his lover through the crowd, thinking that when Obi-Wan was his apprentice he would have been scandalised by Qui-Gon's behaviour, but now he seemed to be quite enjoying it. Qui-Gon felt a pang for the years lost and the time they would never have again.
"It pays to be a maverick," Obi-Wan said, drawing Qui-Gon back to the present. 'We have lost time, my love, but if we had not, do you believe you would have been ready to admit your love?'
'Possibly not.'
"Then be glad of the time we have, Qui-Gon." Obi-Wan gave his partner a cheeky grin. "What is it you're always telling me?"
"To live in the moment?"
"That's the one." And so saying, Obi-Wan kissed him and dragged him onward to their quarters and their large empty bed.
Obi-Wan once again found himself standing outside the Senate, lost in the Darkness that was so close. He was so close to finding its darkest shadow when the vision invaded his mind, causing him to stagger under its weight. Over the years he had grown accustomed to the sudden arrival of knowledge in his mind of places he must go to or people he must save or kill. This knowledge was not always visual, sometimes he just knew; others he acted upon instinct. This one, however, surrounded him as if reality. Perhaps it was because he was already immersed in his senses of the Warrior, or perhaps the Force was counselling particular urgency. Whatever the reason, the force of death pushed into his mind and saturated his senses. For a moment he lost his own mind and fell into the death Master Jorsa would suffer if he did not reach her in time.
It was pure instinct that pulled his mind from physical death to follow her life instead to where she was now. A tiny planet, Goren, but that was not the place of her murder.
Obi-Wan began striding towards the Temple, pulling out his communicator as he went.
"Windu."
"Mace, when is Jorsa due to leave Goren?"
"Six days."
"Find me a fast ship, I need to be there before she leaves."
He disconnected the line and sped up his pace. All signs of Knight Kenobi had fled the young man's face after the vision had abated; all that was left now was the shadows as Light and Dark flickered to the fore. With each step he took, Obi-Wan knew with more certainty his part, a path he had not dared to believe; he was the Shadow for all Jedi; nothing in the galaxy could alter that, not the Jedi, not the Council, not the Force and not love. He did not have to merge his roles, because there truly was only one, to protect the Jedi.
Dusk had settled by the time Obi-Wan reached the Temple and strode up to the waiting vessel.
"This is how it is going to be, isn't it?" he asked, stopping abruptly on the ship's ramp. He turned to the person he spoke to. Yaddle sat at the bottom of the ramp, looking up at him.
"What does your heart tell you, Shadow?"
"It grieves that I cannot even say goodbye to Qui-Gon."
"Does it?"
"No," Obi-Wan sighed, never able to lie to the one who was the voice of the Shadow's heart on the Council. "It grieves because although I could say goodbye to him through the bond, I will not."
"Why is that?" Yaddle asked, unrelenting in her quest for truth, knowing it was the final hurdle for the Jedi before her in accepting what, no, who, he was.
Great certainty fell upon Obi-Wan's mind then, certainty that both removed a weight from his mind, but added one to his heart.
"Because I protect the Jedi. The bond between us is one of love, love as we are, not as we appear to be. Qui-Gon is a hero and a great Jedi negotiator, within and without."
"And you are the Shadows and Death."
"Yes," Obi-Wan all but sobbed. He could not be a Jedi knight on the outside and a Shadow within, it was not who Qui-Gon loved, it was not what forged the bond.
"Life you also are, Obi-Wan. Serve the Light you do."
"Will you go and see him? Explain?" he asked, desperate to find some comfort for the fate of his relationship with Qui-Gon.
"Understand he already does, finally recognises his love for you he does, but go for you I will."
"Thank you," Obi-Wan said, offering a weak smile, before once again embracing the odd mix of Darkness and Light that was his Force sense as the Warrior.
"Live among the Jedi you can, Shadowed one. You no longer need the cloak of death, know it yet, they may not, but stand amongst us and be part of us you can. Learn this you must, if our protector you stay."
"I'll try."
"There is no try..." Yaddle began, but stopped when she saw, what Mace called 'That Smile' blossom on Obi-Wan's face. It was a smile of mischief, cunning and stubbornness. It was a sign to the elderly Jedi that her words had reached into him and that Obi-Wan was on the right path and with every passing moment understood his role better. It filled him, this knowledge, and before her she thought she saw in the man the growth of power beyond even Yoda's reckoning.
Only Knight Obi-Wan Kenobi, the Shadow of the Jedi and the Protector of the Order, would dare answer back to the Council and smirk at one of Yoda's most prized sayings.
"May the Force be with you, Master Shadow."
He said nothing else, did not even show surprise at the title she used, but turned back to the ship, and with added purpose, left Coruscant.
Yaddle made her way back from the landing platforms, and at the entry to the Temple she found Qui-Gon.
"I felt it," he explained.
"His vision?" she asked, surprised.
"No, the moment he cut me off. I have no sense of him at all. I remembered it from Naboo; I knew what it meant so I came to see him leave."
"Do this every time you cannot," she told him with a faint scowl.
"I am aware of that," he angrily retorted, but his words softened as he continued. "But this time I allowed myself the luxury."
The two masters started to walk back along the Temple corridor, neither with a destination in mind, but both wishing to be surrounded by the comfort of the Force and the other Jedi.
"Fine he will be."
"Of that I have no doubt."
They continued on, deeper into the Temple, silent.
"Understand you do, what Obi-Wan is?"
"I confess that I did not, not until I saw him fight the Sith on Naboo. His whole being was in tune with the Force, all aspects of it as he was completely emerged in the dance of battle; it was an amazing thing to behold."
"Like to see that I would."
"You mean you have not?" Qui-Gon stopped, surprised by Yaddle's confession.
Yaddle patted his shins and led him to one of the many alcoves that littered the Temple's halls. They sat together and the last of the evening sun filtered in through the high windows, bathing them in a warm glow.
"No living Force sensitive has; hide himself from the Jedi he saves, Obi-Wan does. The only ones to see it are those he fights and dead they are. Or incapable of understanding what it was they fought against. He revealed himself to you, Qui-Gon, a gift that is."
"I know, one I cherish for its meaning."
"Good for him, you are," Yaddle nodded approvingly.
"I thought I was a dangerous maverick," Qui-Gon said with some humour.
"A maverick, maybe, dangerous never. Because of your techniques and methods, Master Jinn, have a Jedi Warrior we do who can fight and stand alone. He, like his master, is unconventional. Makes him a good Force Warrior it does."
"How long did they live?"
"Who?" Yaddle asked, momentarily confused.
"The other Warriors, the ones who came before."
"In tune with war they all have been, apt at fighting and skilled with a lightsabre," Yaddle explained, telling Qui-Gon some of what she had learnt upon discovering that their was a Force Warrior amongst them. "But despite this they were all beaten, for they were not invulnerable. Died they all did, fighting for the Jedi."
"You did not answer my question."
"No, and answer it I shall not. Compare their fates to Obi-Wan you should not. Strong he is and live in different time he does."
"Yes, a time when the Sith have risen again." Qui-Gon sounded bitter even to his own ears.
"Yes, returned the Sith are, but coincidence do you think it is that as the same time the first Warrior for generations walks among the Jedi? And a Warrior such as he?"
"Such as he?" Qui-Gon did not understand Yaddle's cryptic words.
"Other Warrior protectors the Jedi have had, Warrior Sith there have been also, but within none of the legends we have found tells of one such as your Obi-Wan. With Light he fights, but within Darkness also. A true Shadow he is."
With that, Yaddle left Qui-Gon alone with his thoughts of fate, destiny and memories of being followed by nothing more than a fleeting shadow within the Force.
Chapter 8
Qui-Gon took the long way back to his quarters, knowing they would be empty. He could no longer feel Obi-Wan in his mind; the bond was silent. He would know if Obi-Wan died, for the bond would shudder with the transition of one half going into the Force, but he could not sense his soulmate; he could have stood right next to him and not been able to sense him within the waves of the Force. Qui-Gon had felt the loneliness Obi-Wan had endured in his exile, but now he fully comprehended his isolation; to be aware of the bond, but unable to communicate with his beloved was a strange kind of torture.
Qui-Gon wandered the Temple, almost mindlessly, until he found himself outside the Garden of Blossoms. He felt drawn in and walked under the flowering trees, making his way to the far corner, wanting to see the tree his love had planted so many years ago. He strolled and wondered why he had hardly ever visited the garden in the past; it was positively alive with the Living Force. The garden was in bloom all year round; as one species rested another sprung forth with its blooms. When he reached the distant corner he did not find what he had expected.
The tree was dead, withered and black, but still somehow beautiful in it haunting image. Fruit, leaves and petals littered the ground in an array of summer colours. The tree was bare and its bark blacker than charcoal. He was stunned.
"Frightening, isn't it?"
Qui-Gon turned to see Mace approaching.
"I don't understand."
"The tree's connection with Obi-Wan has been broken; its path is complete."
Qui-Gon reached out with the Living Force and sensed the tree's history and its purpose. There was no sense of Obi-Wan, his presence erased as though he had never set foot in the garden.
"He is the Shadow, he has finally come to understand this."
"Yes," Mace answered, even though Qui-Gon had not asked him a question. "His relationship with you was the last factor in his identity."
Mace stood at Qui-Gon's side and as he spoke he studied his old friend.
"You look pleased."
"Obi-Wan has found his path, I am prouder of him than I thought possible. He is a far greater Jedi than I."
"Than any of us," Mace acknowledged. "Or at least, different."
The two masters turned and left the garden together, Qui-Gon no longer needing the connection to Obi-Wan that he hoped the tree would offer.
"I admit, I felt fear for Obi-Wan," Qui-Gon confessed as they walked. "He will die a violent death."
"Maybe."
"It does not matter, it's how he'd wish to die; fighting for us. I had not realised that it was not just Obi-Wan that needed to accept his fate, but me also. I love a shadow, Mace; a man not of the Dark side, but not entirely of the Light, either. I've prided myself on following the will of the Force and despaired when I lost my first apprentice to the Dark side, but it would seem my second apprentice will not tread the path of the Light, either."
Mace studied his friend closely, seeing the other Jedi was not grieved by his revelation, but strangely comforted by it.
"The Council has asked me to inform you of a position on the Council, if you so wish."
Qui-Gon looked surprised and stopped in the middle of the corridor, forcing the other Jedi master to stop also.
"Why?"
"Two reasons, really; one, you are master to the Chosen One and two, you are bonded to the Warrior." Mace saw Qui-Gon's expression, which was not one of pleasure. "Wait, before you get angry and start shouting at me for interfering."
"Again."
Mace chose to ignore Qui-Gon's interruption; at least he was listening.
"There are advantages for you also; on the Council you'd have added influence concerning Anakin and you would be able to hear of Obi-Wan's movements without breaking security, or the rules."
"I will consider it," was all Qui-Gon said to the explanation.
"Good." Mace knew when not to push.
They left it at that, Mace going back to his office and Qui-Gon back to his quarters. He expected his home to be empty, but when he got there he found that it was not.
"Anakin, I thought you had a class?" Sensing the boy's agitation he asked in concern and not as an accusation.
"I do, but I felt Obi-Wan go, I felt it when he disappeared."
"What did you feel?"
"It was a sudden lack, as though he wasn't ever really there. He has gone, hasn't he?"
Qui-Gon smiled a little, knowing the two had become friends despite some fears that remained in the boy's heart. Qui-Gon reached out through the bond to his apprentice and opened his arms to give him some comfort.
"Yes, he has gone."
"He didn't even say goodbye."
"No, he didn't, and that's how it will be more often than not. He has his duty and we have our own. Sometimes our paths will cross. He will return, Anakin."
"I know." Anakin snuggled deeper into Qui-Gon's cloak and smothered his senses in the comfort of his master's presence. "Will you miss him?"
With his apprentice's question, Qui-Gon felt his bitterness rise and his loneliness wash over him. With some difficulty he was able to answer Anakin without allowing his negative emotions from affecting his voice.
"I already do, Padawan."
"Me too."
They stayed together, comforting each other from the departure of a loved one, growing used to the empty space where up until only hours before, Obi-Wan's presence had been. However, the longer Qui-Gon was immersed in the bond, the more he became aware of another bond leading to Anakin's mind. It was another training bond, a training bond to Obi-Wan. He did not show his surprise or tell the boy, who seemed unaware of its presence.
'I wonder if Obi-Wan knows...'
He took a moment to think on their times together.
'Yes,' he reluctantly admitted to himself. 'He knows, but what does it mean?'
Qui-Gon tactfully explored the bond, finding it unlike any other bond.
'It is almost like a ghost of a bond.'
Qui-Gon thought he was being gentle and careful, but he realised he had not been when a quite voice sounded in his head.
'Please stop.' The voice was beset with grief.
'Obi-Wan?'
'It is a bond from another time and a painful reminder.' Obi-Wan sounded as if he spoke from a great distance and the master realised that reaching out to talk to him was costing the younger man a great deal of strength.
'Go, Obi-Wan, we will talk later.'
'I love you,' Qui-Gon heard in his mind as he, too, said the words to his lover. Obi-Wan withdrew, but the comfort Qui-Gon had found was broken. The grief in Obi-Wan's mind lingered. Qui-Gon looked down at the boy cradled in his arms and despaired, wondering if any of them would ever find peace.
Life and training continued for the newly forged master-apprentice team. Qui-Gon found Anakin to be a keen and apt pupil; he excelled in many areas of his training and where he lacked he persevered until that too was perfect. It was not long before Qui-Gon told Anakin that it was time he begin work on his first lightsabre.
"Really?" the boy asked, not daring to believe his master's words.
"Yes, Anakin," Qui-Gon said with a smile, remembering when he had begun building his first 'sabre and how excited he had been.
"Can I have a green one like yours, Master?"
"I'm afraid it doesn't work like that, Ani," the Jedi master told the apprentice. "You must choose as guided by the Force, not because you like the colour."
"Oh," the boy sounded a little disappointed.
Through the bond, Qui-Gon could see a faint dream the boy had of one day being a great Jedi like his master, the dream dimmed slightly.
"It still may be green, Anakin," he added, not wanting his apprentice to lose his youthful fantasy so soon. "But remember, you need not be like your old master to be a great Jedi."
Anakin grinned and the vision of the dream once again became sharper.
"Come, my young apprentice, let us go and view some specs on the computer and plan your very own weapon."
At this the boy's eyes went as round as saucers, his love of mechanics and building anything he could think of had not diminished when he left Tatooine, and the news that he could not only build his 'sabre, but design it also left the apprentice speechless.
He leapt up from the dining room table and went to the apartment's computer; Qui-Gon followed a little slower, not spurred on by youthful enthusiasm.
"You ought to be more careful," said a voice by Qui-Gon's ear. "I could have been anyone."
Up until moments before, Qui-Gon Jinn had been alone in Senator Toora's anteroom. He had not heard anyone enter, nor anyone approach him. He did not turn to the owner of the voice, who stood but a whispered breath away; instead he spoke as he looked out at the busy airways of Coruscant.
"If you had been anyone else," he answered neutrally, "it would be you that ought to be more careful."
"True," was the answer followed by a faint breath of laugher.
In an instant, between one heartbeat and the next, Qui-Gon's senses were full of Obi-Wan Kenobi, both through the bond they shared and the Force. As he once again stood safely by his lover's side, Obi-Wan let go of the grip he held on the Force that he had used to weave around himself and cloak his presence, so seamlessly that not even his bondmate could sense him within the Force.
"Master Jinn?"
Both Jedi turned as one to look at the Senator's aide, who had come to escort Qui-Gon into Toora's main office. The two men shared a quick smile, neither had noticed the aide's arrival, both so wrapped up in their own senses of each other. Obi-Wan stepped away from his bondmate without even the smallest hint of embarrassment that he would have felt as a padawan. He gave the older Jedi a slight bow and said,
"I shall wait for you here, Master."
Qui-Gon nodded his assent and then followed the aide into see Toora. He only just managed to resist the temptation of glancing back over his shoulder to catch a last glimpse of his returned lover. He had not noticed any injury on the other Jedi, he seemed unscathed after his most recent mission and appeared relaxed and beautiful in his traditional Jedi robes and tunics, but the bondmate that existed under the Jedi master exterior was anxious to thoroughly check his lover.
Obi-Wan spent an hour in quiet meditation as he waited for Qui-Gon to return. He entered a light trance to seek his calm centre and the balance he required to live his dual-life. He found it easily now, having finally become accustomed to the most recent changes in his life and he spent the remainder of his time enjoying the presence of Qui-Gon in his mind again.
"Shall we go?"
"Have you and the Senator finished?" Obi-Wan asked, without opening his eyes, prolonging the anticipation of seeing Qui-Gon.
"For now."
Obi-Wan opened his eyes and found that Qui-Gon was standing directly in front of him. He had to tilt his head up to look the taller Jedi in the eye. What he saw was the prefect persona of a Jedi master. What he sensed through the bond was entirely different. Desire and concern warred with each other. Obi-Wan stood gracefully and walked with Qui-Gon as they made their way out of the Senate building and onto the busy walkways that surrounded the heart of the Republic.
"Are you here for long?"
"I leave in the morning," Obi-Wan said as he led them away from the Senate and, to Qui-Gon's surprise, they did not head towards the Temple. Obi-Wan could feel Qui-Gon's curiosity through the bond so he explained, "I do not wish to go to the Temple, too many eyes watching. I have somewhere else in mind, if you don't object."
"As you wish."
Qui-Gon followed Obi-Wan through the crowds of people which gradually thinned as they made their way to the lower levels of Coruscant where the sun's light barely reached and where those who did not want to be noticed dwelled. The two Jedi entered a non-descript building and climbed three flights of grubby, dingy stairs. Obi-Wan led his lover down a narrow corridor and finally stopped outside the fifth door on the left. There was nothing about it that made it stand apart from any of the others.
"This is where I stayed," Obi-Wan told Qui-Gon. "When I was away from you."
He keyed the lock and the door swept open and Obi-Wan allowed Qui-Gon to enter first. The master looked around the tiny, one room apartment with interest. It was neat and clean; a small kitchenette was to his left and to his right was a large double bed. In between was an open space with enough room to perhaps perform some simple, open-handed katas. There was a single door that Qui-Gon assumed led to the fresher. The wall directly in front of him was dominated by a large picture window with a view of a wall.
"Not very homely," he commented sadly.
"It was somewhere to sleep," Obi-Wan answered, shrugging. "I did not need it often and honestly in those years I don't think anywhere would have felt like home."
Obi-Wan closed the door and, as he had done in the Senate building, stood behind Qui-Gon. This time, however, he snaked his arms around Qui-Gon's waist and rested his forehead on the nape of his bondmate's neck.
"I missed you," he whispered, a trace of his despair at their parting seeping into his voice. "This time more so than before."
"This time you had more to miss... as did I."
Obi-Wan stepped back a little, but did not break contact with Qui-Gon. His hands stroked up his lover's back and then across his broad shoulders before pulling at the material of the cloak so that it slid off the Jedi master.
"And what else did you miss, my dear Master?"
Qui-Gon turned with a growl.
"Let me demonstrate."
He reached out to Obi-Wan and dragged his lover in close to his body, devouring his mouth in a hungry kiss. His aggression was met and returned full force. He felt the smaller man push him back and back until the backs of his legs hit the bed and he tumbled down onto the mattress.
"Get those clothes off, Qui-Gon. Now!" Qui-Gon moved to obey the command, but his hands stopped half way to his belt as he watched, transfixed, as Obi-Wan removed his clothing. Boots were discarded and layers of tunics and leggings were pulled away to reveal hard, toned muscles. Once naked, Obi-Wan turned back to his lover, who lay motionless on the bed.
"I thought I told you to get undressed," a predatory smiled crossed Obi-Wan's face. "Do you need some assistance, my Master?"
He did not wait for an answer. The Shadow crawled onto the bed and sat, straddling Qui-Gon's hips. He lent forward. Before Qui-Gon's mouth was claimed, the Jedi master saw another flash of his lover's mischievous smile. Obi-Wan claimed Qui-Gon; he buried his hands in thick, silver hair and was only dimly aware of the hands stroking his sides and cupping the cheeks of his arse.
Obi-Wan kissed down Qui-Gon's neck and growled as he encountered his soulmate's tunics. He wrenched the tunics free of the belt Qui-Gon still wore and then bit down on the now exposed collarbone.
Qui-Gon let out a surprised cry and felt his arousal build as his lover kissed and sucked at the bite.
"Obi-Wan," he said, but could say no more.
There was a brief pause and Obi-Wan was gone. Qui-Gon tried to sit up, but a returned Obi-Wan pushed him back flat on the bed. Nimble fingers removed the master's belt and slid his leggings down, over his erection, and around his knees. His boots he still wore, preventing the removal of his leggings, but Obi-Wan seemed not to care. Using the lubricant he had retrieved from the bedside table, Obi-Wan generously coated his lover's erection, enticing another groan from the prone man.
"Are you ready, Qui-Gon?"
"Obi-Wan."
Obi-Wan smiled as the near helpless arousal that pulsed through Qui-Gon's mind through the bond. He once again straddled Qui-Gon and very slowly lowered himself onto his beloved's member.
When the head of Qui-Gon's penis first breached Obi-Wan's entrance, Qui-Gon fought his need to push upwards, desperately seeking the closeness that was moments away. They had not been together for some time and Qui-Gon, even in his lust-induced delirium, recognised the need for patience.
Obi-Wan slowly lowered himself until Qui-Gon filled him completely. He rested there for a moment, catching his breath. He looked down at his bedmate and smiled in satisfaction to see the Jedi master's head tilted back in a silent groan, his eyes shut, hair in disarray. With exaggerated slowness, Obi-Wan lifted up. Qui-Gon's hands stroked up his thighs and came to rest on his hipbones.
Together they set a gentle rhythm that soon faltered in the heat of their desire. Qui-Gon plunged into Obi-Wan deeply. He held onto one hip while his other hand stroked Obi-Wan's erection.
They came together, happy and sated.
Later, cuddled together on the large bed, the two men lay facing each other, legs entangled and arms wrapped around each other.
"What is wrong, my own?" Qui-Gon asked finally, seeing that the concern he had felt for Obi-Wan when he had first seen him was not due to a physical injury, but an internal pain.
"Nothing, beloved."
"You could never lie to me, Obi-Wan." Qui-Gon stroked a piece of hair that had fallen across Obi-Wan's forehead. "How did the mission go?"
"Fine." Obi-Wan took hold of Qui-Gon's hand, preventing him from playing with his hair further. "How is Anakin and his training?"
"He's fine and his training is progressing, he is beginning to work on his lightsabre."
"I hear you have been offered a place on the Council."
"Yes."
"But you hesitate?"
"Yes. I am not sure if I want it or not or if it's the best course of action," Qui-Gon said, relenting to Obi-Wan's blatant attempt to change the subject, even if it was only momentary. "You're avoiding the question, Obi-Wan."
Qui-Gon did not want to pressure Obi-Wan, nevertheless, he knew that they could not avoid the conversation indefinitely.
"No, I'm not."
"Obi-Wan." Qui-Gon did not need to say anything else. The tone he used was one the master had often used when Obi-Wan had been his apprentice. Years of training compelled Obi-Wan answer.
"I am afraid, Qui-Gon," Obi-Wan began reluctantly. "I am afraid that I am failing in my duty."
Obi-Wan rose from the bed and moved to stand before the viewless window. His vision instead was turned inwards, consumed by something only he could see; his memories.
"Something is wrong; I am not as I was before."
The sound of despair in his whisper twisted something deep within Qui-Gon's heart. The Jedi master rose also, donning his cloak before going to his bondmate, placing Obi-Wan's cloak around his shoulders.
"Before the bond?"
His only answer was the tensing of shoulders beneath his hands and a small nod of Obi-Wan's head. Qui-Gon stood behind his lover and wrapped his arms around him. Qui-Gon was relieved when Obi-Wan leaned back into his touch.
"Do you fear that it is the bond?" he asked, half whispering his own fear into the tawny hair.
"Yes."
Qui-Gon's fear had been spoken and he desperately wished he could turn from the conversation, a conversation he had insisted upon.
"Do you regret it?"
Obi-Wan quickly turned in his arms so that they stood facing each other, fearful blue eyes met stormy grey.
"Never."
Qui-Gon let out a relieved breath and Obi-Wan laid his head on his bondmate's chest. They were silent, only for a moment, allowing each other to gather their thoughts.
"I will never regret my love for you, Master. You are what keeps me safe."
"Then trust me now, beloved, to keep you safe from your memories. Tell me what happened that has given you this fear."
And so Obi-Wan told Qui-Gon what had happened while he was gone from his side.
Chapter 9
Obi-Wan did not allow himself to think about the man he was leaving behind as he piloted the small, but fast, ship out of Coruscant's atmosphere. Even after he had set his course and entered hyperspace, his thoughts did not dwell on his beloved left behind. Instead, he read Master Jorsa's mission briefing and the files on the planet Zana'ut. He read them until he was satisfied that they would not offer any more insight into his current mission. And it was only then that he settled himself in the pilot's chair and entered a light meditation.
Within his mind he relived the morning before and bathed in the love he had found with his master. It was during this time that Qui-Gon discovered the training bond he shared with Anakin. Had he not already been immersed in the bond he may not have felt Qui-Gon's curiosity and surprise at his discovery, such was the distance between them.
The brief contact between their minds was enough to cause Obi-Wan's sorrow to surge forward. The Shadow was strong and composed, but the man who lay at his heart grieved for the way their lives must be lived; apart, with the chance of reunions uncertain.
The vessel sped towards Goren and the Shadow of the Jedi was forced to abandon all thoughts of others, except the one life he had been given the opportunity to save.
"Knight Kenobi?"
"What is it, Mace?" Obi-Wan knew that Mace would not contact him without good cause, however he was annoyed at the master's interruption.
"We have just received word from Jorsa. She completed her mission on Goren earlier than expected and she is already on her way to Zana."
"Damn."
"Will you make it in time?"
"I will try."
"There is no try."
"Go away, Mace."
"May the Force be with you."
Obi-Wan changed his course, hoping that he would reach Jorsa in time.
From space, Zana'ut looked peaceful enough. Obi-Wan was not deceived by its appearance, though, he knew war raged upon its surface, scarring the planet and its people. Prepared for his task, Obi-Wan took the ship down, heading to a military base on the northern continent, knowing that was where the threat to Jorsa's life came from and where the other Jedi master had already landed. She had beaten him there, although not by much. Obi-Wan prayed to the Force that he was in time to prevent the fate Zana'ut had in store for Jedi Master Jorsa.
"I don't know why I continue to be surprised by it, Qui-Gon: the callus nature of humans. I've seen it so many times, in countless species," Obi-Wan said, breaking from his story suddenly.
Qui-Gon did not interrupt Obi-Wan's thoughts, knowing these, too, were an important part of the tale.
"The Jedi are no longer respected, but feared, and it seems we are here to be used. The Jedi are called and instead of accepting our aid they use us as scapegoats for crimes we had no part in or, like Jorsa, as an anonymous sacrifice to a war that will not end. They wanted Jorsa, not for her skills as a negotiator and mediator, but for the powerful blood in her veins so that they could shed it in the name of their war god."
"Try not to focus on the negative, beloved," Qui-Gon suggested, not liking the distain he heard in Obi-Wan's words. "Maybe there is a positive side, my own."
"Positive side, Qui-Gon? Positive side to the part of humanity's nature that needs to murder?"
"The Zana government has not stooped to murder their own citizens yet, Obi-Wan," Qui-Gon pointed out, knowing that it was little or no consolation.
Obi-Wan snarled in contempt.
"No, they do not, they slaughter them in battle instead and we get sucked into the middle."
"It is our duty, Obi-Wan, to protect the innocent."
"You need not remind me, Master, I know a Jedi's duty. But it is not my sole duty any longer. I know my duty; I now protect the protectors, as well."
"I understand your frustration, beloved and sometimes share it." Qui-Gon held Obi-Wan tighter. "Tell me the rest."
Obi-Wan thought for a moment and then returned to his narrative.
Obi-Wan had not been in time to prevent Jorsa's capture. He had entered the planet's atmosphere on the dark side of the planet, hoping to avoid detection. Zana'ut was not a primitive world, however their incessant war kept their technology from advancing as it might have. Obi-Wan flew in low, skimming the treetops. Close to the compound where the Jedi master was being held, he landed and continued his journey on foot.
He had reached the stronghold while the sun still shone, so now he knelt, hidden in the foliage, waiting for the night to catch up with him. As he waited, watching the patrolling guards, he reached out with his senses to Master Jorsa. She was safe enough now, but she had been injured when the Zanas had first captured her. Her injuries may slow her down when the opportunity to escape came, he thought. However, Obi-Wan was confident that the chance of life his influence offered would be enough.
Night descended on the fortress and so did a Shadow.
Gaining access to the outer courtyard and training area was particularly easy, the outer wall was low enough and narrow enough that the Shadow Warrior could jump it with a Force assisted jump.
Obi-Wan landed without a sound. He stayed where he had landed, crouched, and waited. He could feel the life presence of two guards. They were close, but moving away from his position. Seconds passed and then he was moving again. Running across the grounds, heading straight for the door he had guessed led to the guards' break room.
He entered without hesitation and immediately came face to face with a surprised guard. Obi-Wan, acting on pure instinct, lashed out with his fist, striking the other man on his larynx, silencing any cry that the guard may have been about to make. With his other hand he grabbed a fistful of hair and rammed the guard's head into the solid stone wall. The other two guards in the room went down just as quickly and just as silently.
Obi-Wan knew he did not have much time before his victims were discovered. He hastened from the room, leaving by the rear door. It led into a long, narrow corridor that ran around the inner circuit of the second wall. He did not pause to look in either direction; instead he leapt at the delicate window directly in front of him. It shattered on impact. The ground on the other side of the second defence wall was considerably lower than the one that was on the outer side and all that lay between the second and third walls was a wide, empty trench, filled with camouflaged pike heads.
What might have been an adequate form of defence against a Zana, was no obstacle for a Jedi. Obi-Wan sprinted though the minefield, sure-footed, trusting the Force not to let him step wrong. He crossed the wide trench at an angle, aiming for the place on the wall where, thirty feet above, was an observation balcony. Just as he had done with the outer wall, Obi-Wan leapt and landed on the viewing platform. Jorsa was held in the keep at the centre of the structure, however what Obi-Wan sought was here, within the third wall.
He found it quickly and easily: the generator; the source of all the hold's power. It was a simple matter to disable. Just as Obi-Wan raised his lightsabre, he felt a ripple in the Force; the guards had been discovered. He plunged the blade down, through metal and circuitry. The 'sabre melted all that it touched and suddenly all was silent and dark. The hum of electricity coursing through wires was deadened. Not waiting to be discovered, Obi-Wan was once again running down corridors, seeking the door that led to the inner courtyard. The loss of power would open the cell doors, the electronic locks would spring open, but Obi-Wan wanted to be as Jorsa's shadow until she had found a way to a ship and off planet.
Obi-Wan's sense of the Jedi master was changing. She was on the move. He would find her and guard her back if necessary. Obi-Wan reached the courtyard, but he had not been prepared for what he found.
The smell of death engulfed him. Old and new blood splattered the ground, creating a carpet of sticky red. An altar sat at the centre of the great square, made of stone, but not one path of stone was visible beneath the blood. Pikes lined the square and upon each was the remains of those sacrificed to the war god of Zana'ut, all manner of species, old, new and all rotting.
Obi-Wan felt the Force rush from him. Here was the place of Jorsa's death. He stood where she was to meet her end, yet other than his horror, the Shadow felt nothing. The vision that was visited upon him only days before on Coruscant, deserted his sight; the feel of battle left his veins and the presence of guards, soldiers and Jedi alike left his mind. Only Obi-Wan Kenobi remained; Jedi knight.
The loss was only momentary and in the instant that Obi-Wan felt his senses desert him, they returned to him. He continued forward, knowing he still had a duty to perform, to protect Jorsa, but now he proceeded with more caution, not knowing if the lapse in his abilities would repeat itself.
He caught up with the other Jedi as she was liberating her confiscated lightsabre. She was bleeding from numerous wounds, however Obi-Wan could sense she had the strength to continue on. He fought at her back, fighting soldiers and guards that would have attacked her from behind. He protected her, unseen, as she made her way deeper into the centre of the fortress. Not towards the freedom of the walls, but to the small landing bay on the roof.
The fighting on the roof was fierce, but brief. Now, free and with an unseen Shadow, Jorsa was unstoppable. She boarded one of the ships standing ready for take off and prepared to leave the planet that was almost her grave.
Obi-Wan watched her as she ran up the ramp into the belly of the ship. He sensed her reach the cockpit and heard the ship's engines power up. He saw the boarding ramp begin to close and prepared to run the small distance to the ship and stow away.
'I hope Mace doesn't mind the loss of my ship.'
He was about to leave his place of shelter when once again the Force around him rippled and contracted, and for the second time he stood bare, without his sense of battle playing in his ears and through his soul.
His loss once again froze him and it was that moment that the ship launched itself into the air, taking with it any chance the Shadow had of escaping with Jorsa.
Obi-Wan watched the ship go, knowing Master Jorsa was aboard, but no longer able to sense her, or any other Jedi, that he could normally find through the web within the Force. Obi-Wan did not know what made him do it, it certainly did not come through a warning within the Force. The Jedi turned and saw an anti-aircraft gun preparing to fire on the rapidly escaping vessel.
Obi-Wan did not think; he acted.
It was not the Shadow that leapt forward or a push from the Force that only the Warrior could feel that caused him to act; it was his training as a Jedi. More than twenty years of training took over Obi-Wan as he jumped onto the gun turret and sank his 'sabre into the firing mechanism. He heard, more than felt, the weapon backfire. He had barely jumped down when the explosion lifted him off his feet and propelled him across the landing platform and over the edge of the keep.
He fell and fell and had he been only a man, the fall would have killed him. However, Obi-Wan was not just a man and even without his added abilities as the Jedi protector, he was still a Jedi knight. Using the Force, he slowed his descent and landed, heavily, on his feet in one of the gardens that, with the sacrifice square, circled the inner keep. His fall had shortened his route out of the stronghold, but he still had the three outer wall defences to get through.
'I just hope that Jorsa's escape will have caused enough disruption that they won't be expecting someone to be trying to escape out the front door.'
Getting through the third and second defences was simple enough; Obi-Wan barely saw any soldiers. He discovered the reason for this when he reached the second wall and the courtyard between it and the outer wall: rows and rows of solders stood, waiting for an attack, the commander of the fort believing their loss of power to be a prelude to an attack by their enemy. Obi-Wan had not sensed them, the Force had not warned him of the danger his chosen escape route possessed. His senses were silent; all he felt were the currents in the Force that all Jedi could feel.
'It's too late now,' Obi-Wan thought, hearing the commotion of guards in the corridor behind him. 'I can only go forward.'
Evan without his Warrior capabilities, Obi-Wan still had one advantage; they were expecting an attack from without, not within. Centring himself, and releasing all concern for his partial loss of the Force, Obi-Wan threw himself into battle. With Force assistance he ran across out into the courtyard. He was a third of the way through when the surprised shout to attack went up.
Immediately, Obi-Wan was surrounded by blasters all aimed at him and all firing.
He did not pause. He ignited his lightsabre, deflected bolts of blaster fire with it, but he did not stop his forward momentum. He was forced to slow his pace, becoming a more tangible target for his foes, however his blade moved constantly and kept him from harm. As he continued forward, Obi-Wan felt something building.
He hoped he knew what it was. He stopped his progression forwards; he waited in the centre of a storm of blaster fire. He deflected only shots that would cause him harm, otherwise he was still. With a deep, calming breath he closed his eyes and allowed whatever it was building within him loose.
The man who opened his eyes was once more the most dangerous man in the galaxy. Every soldier in the square came into his awareness and he fought through them with ease. He jumped and somersaulted over the wall, killing the two sentries that stood on its narrow walkway and as soon as his feet touched the ground he was running into the jungle. The soldiers of Zana'ut tried to give chase, but failed to once again catch sight of the fleeing Shadow.
The Warrior, without pause, boarded his craft and took to the skies, exiting the planet's atmosphere with not another weapon fired.
"Then it is not the mission itself that bothers you, is it, beloved?" Qui-Gon asked when Obi-Wan had finished his tale.
"No, in comparison, Jorsa's fate would not have been the worst I have been witness to," Obi-Wan said, remembering the vision of another's death that had almost destroyed his whole world. "My loss of control frightens me, for I've never felt that before; I've never been that afraid."
If Obi-Wan had been less distracted, his next words may never have been said.
"I did not feel that kind of fear, not even on Naboo when I fought the Sith and saw you die."
Such was Obi-Wan's concern for the Jedi that even after revealing the terrible truth of Naboo, he did not even realise what he had just confessed. Obi-Wan had not admitted to Qui-Gon the contents of his vision. Qui-Gon had suspected, had guessed the extent to which his life had been in peril; the Force had called Obi-Wan to him for a reason, but hearing it now, spoken aloud for the first time, sent chills through the master's body and for a fleeting moment he was sure he felt a searing, burning pain pierce his chest.
But that fate had not been his.
Qui-Gon tried to let go of the threatening vision that clouded his eyes. Later he could meditate on what he now knew for certain, for now he had greater concerns than those of a past that was unchangeable, a concern that affected not only him, but all Jedi.
"You believe it is the bond that had caused this lapse in your skills."
"What else could it be, Qui-Gon? If you can think of an alternative I'd gladly listen. I could not."
Obi-Wan fell silent and Qui-Gon did not break the quiet. Both Jedi became lost in thoughts of the possible consequences of their bonding.
"Qui-Gon," Obi-Wan finally said, his voice more sure now, although it still held a trace of the fear he had felt only moments before as he had told his story. "Even if it is the case and the bond is to blame, it was the will of the Force."
"Is that a comfort to you, Obi-Wan?" Qui-Gon asked quietly, brushing the pad of his thumb along Obi-Wan's cheek in a gentle, comforting caress as the other Jedi looked up at him.
"It relieves my guilt," Obi-Wan admitted. "But not my fear for the Jedi, if they were to lose their protector. I am needed."
"Let's not borrow trouble now, Obi-Wan. Live in the moment," Qui-Gon reminded with some humour.
"I have found the comfort and value of embracing the moment, Master," the younger Jedi told his lover. "But it is my connection to the future that guides me."
Qui-Gon could not argue against that, even if he was a Jedi master, for no one, except the Jedi Warrior truly knew or understood his senses that were unique to him. However, even to the outside observer, it was clear that in order to protect the Jedi, his sense of the Force relied on forewarnings. Qui-Gon felt frustrated with his inability to soothe his bondmate's concerns or to lighten the burden or responsibility.
"You have, Qui-Gon," Obi-Wan said, catching a whisper of his lover's thoughts through the bond.
'Just by being here,' Obi-Wan brushed his own temple as he spoke to Qui-Gon through the bond. 'You have helped.'
"I'm not alone anymore, Qui-Gon."
"I'm glad."
Obi-Wan broke eye contact and once again laid his head on Qui-Gon's chest, hearing the steady beating of his master's heart.
"We have not finished talking yet," Qui-Gon reluctantly said and felt Obi-Wan tense a little in his arms. He stroked small circles on his lover's back. "What I am about to ask may change your mind about my presence being a comfort."
'Nothing could do that, beloved.'
Qui-Gon felt Obi-Wan's fierce love for him as he spoke into his mind.
"Ask your question, Qui-Gon."
Obi-Wan believed he knew what it was that Qui-Gon wanted to ask.
'The explanation will be less difficult now, now that I have told him of his death,' Obi-Wan thought. Qui-Gon now knew he had narrowly escaped death on Naboo, but to share such a painful fate, unfulfilled though it was, 'Is almost unbearable.'
"Why do you have a training bond with Anakin?"
"I don't."
"Obi-Wan..."
"It's not a bond, not really." Obi-Wan tried to explain. "What you felt... there would have been a bond if you had not stopped the Sith apprentice on Naboo."
"Then why did you feel such grief when I discovered the bond." Suddenly, a memory rose up in Qui-Gon's mind, a memory of their journey back from Naboo. "Why will you not let Anakin call you Master?"
"It is complicated."
"Will you tell me what you saw?"
Obi-Wan did not speak, but Qui-Gon felt Obi-Wan's head shift against his chest as he nodded.
Obi-Wan did not look up as he recounted his vision, but instead he stayed safely in Qui-Gon's arms, needing to hear the reassuring beat of a heart that would have stopped beating on a planet lightyears away. With that comforting sound echoing though his mind, Obi-Wan began to speak.
"I can not tell you it all, but I can tell you some of what I felt and what I saw..." Obi-Wan took a breath before plunging into his story. "I was on my way back to Coruscant when I felt the danger to you, there was no vision, no sound, just the feeling that told me that it was you that was in danger and the strand of the web that links me to all Jedi that leads to you was being tugged on. So I changed course and headed to Tyron."
And so saying, Obi-Wan told Qui-Gon his perspective of the mission on the planet Tyron, the master's last mission before he had been sent to Naboo.
Chapter 10
The humidity was the first thing to hit Obi-Wan as he stepped from his ship. The planet Tyron was covered in dense forest and the almost constant sunlight made the air hot and heavy. The Shadow had no idea what his old master's mission was, he had only had time to send a brief transmission to Mace informing him of his new duty, so he had little idea of what to expect. However, he did know that Qui-Gon was already in danger. With his unique senses he could feel the other Jedi; the master was weary, but not exhausted; hungry, but not starving; and not concerned for his situation, just confused. Whatever the situation, it was a mystery to the master, also.
Taking a moment to locate Qui-Gon precisely, the Warrior widened his search within the Force, feeling the presence of others around the older Jedi, all intent on killing their prey. Qui-Gon had already been running for two days. It was time to end the game of cat and mouse by introducing a new kind of predator.
Obi-Wan ran silently into the forest, tracking the Jedi and his pursuers. When he was very close to the group, the forest fell silent.
'Damn, shock grenades,' Obi-Wan thought just as the wave from the grenade flowed through the forest. Qui-Gon had sensed it as easily as Obi-Wan and avoided its incapacitating effects. The Shadow lunged at the nearest bounty hunter. With one slash of Obi-Wan's lightsabre, the attacker on the right, that had been firing at the older Jedi, fell dead at the Warrior's feet. Obi-Wan then sent a nudge towards Qui-Gon through the Force, encouraging the master to begin running again.
Obi-Wan worked his way through the bounty hunters as Qui-Gon ran to his ship. He realised quickly upon joining the battle that it was not a fight that the master had needed any assistance with. The danger was not here on Tyron, but would appear somewhere else. The Shadow played a little with his opponents, not being quite as deadly as he would normally be when someone was threatening the life of a Jedi.
He heard Qui-Gon's ship powering up and the sound of burners engaging. He looked down at the man who he had just felled. He still lived.
"Who hired you?"
There was no answer.
"What was your purpose?"
Still nothing.
With no time for subtlety, Obi-Wan brought the blade of his sabre to within an inch of the man's flesh and with the Force behind his words he said,
"Tell me."
The fear of another and his survival instinct overrode any fear the bounty hunter may have had for the Jedi protector. Obi-Wan sensed his resistance and knew he would not get anything from the bounty hunters. He allowed those that remained to live and let them run to the clearing where Qui-Gon's ship was taking off. He allowed them to go and just as suddenly as he had come, he retreated back to his ship to follow his quarry to Coruscant.
"Did you ever discover who hired the bounty hunters, Obi-Wan?" Qui-Gon asked, bringing the Shadow from his memories.
"Not yet, but I will, I hope."
"So, your first vision of me then, wasn't really a vision."
"No, sometimes it works out like that." Obi-Wan could not explain what he felt through the Force to Qui-Gon, or any one else; it was a sense unique to him.
"I followed you to Coruscant and spoke to the Council, briefly. I told them it was time and that I followed you to Naboo," Obi-Wan continued with his story. "It wasn't until Tatooine and the tattooed warrior that I realised that it was he that was the danger and that it would all end on Naboo."
"What about your vision of the future?"
"That, too, was on Naboo, as I watched you fight the Sith.
"I felt the moment stretch on, but instead of living within its confines as you had always taught me, I looked beyond it, into time where possibilities lie and where the unwritten future can be glanced. I saw the spiralling Darkness and felt the grief of a padawan, who could have been me, as I watched my master die. I felt the heat of a red blade close to my face; I felt it enter you as the phantom future played out before me in its horrifying possibilities.
"I knew that this future could never be; I had discovered my gift. I would not let you die bathed in a blood red light. I would stop what I had been unable to do so in another life, another time, another universe.
"I fought the Sith Warrior with the vision of blood and death in my eyes, and not just your death, but all those that would follow if I could not prevent a single death. I watched you fight him, Qui-Gon; watched as you pushed him back towards rotating shields whose light was the colour of blood.
"I screamed, Qui-Gon, matching the denial of another me, I let it echo through my entire being and I pushed you from the walkway, knowing that you would be able to control your fall." Obi-Wan stopped talking for a moment, caught up in memories both painful and distressing.
"I remember that, Obi-Wan," Qui-Gon said with a calming voice, hoping to keep Obi-Wan with him in the present and not be swallowed by harsh memories. "I remember watching you fight and for the first time truly understanding what you were."
"I fought with fear, Qui-Gon," the younger Jedi confessed. "I could see your death, but I also saw beyond that to my knighting and my first apprentice."
"Anakin."
"Yes, my heart knew that I was not ready for a padawan learner. And if I am not ready, how could the me who had watched his master die and was knighted because of his defeat of a Sith be ready for such a responsibility?"
"You became Anakin's master after my death," Qui-Gon summarised. " But I didn't die, so why then is there a ghost of a bond?"
"I don't know for sure, maybe it's because the future I prevented was a powerful one, a dominant one that was difficult to change."
"But you did," Qui-Gon reminded Obi-Wan, hearing grief creeping back into his lover's voice.
"Maybe." Obi-Wan allowed the word to linger in the air between them, reluctant to explain its meaning, knowing that Qui-Gon would understand that which he left unsaid.
"The danger to me has not passed, that future could still be."
"The danger does not threaten you now, but still it lingers at the back of my mind." Obi-Wan felt frustrated that he could not explain the feeling of danger better. "Your fate is twined with that of the Chosen One. You are vital to his life and training, Qui-Gon, and this puts you in harm's way."
"I have faith in you, Obi-Wan, even when the faith you place in yourself wanes."
Obi-Wan felt relief at the end of the conversation. He now wanted nothing more than to spend the remainder of their time together snuggled in Qui-Gon's arms, sleeping peacefully for the last time before returning to the dangers of the galaxy, which was why when Qui-Gon spoke again, Obi-Wan pushed away from him suddenly; he had not been prepared for Qui-Gon's question.
"It doesn't explain one thing, though, my own. Why do you hate Anakin calling you master so much? It cannot simply be because of my death."
Qui-Gon had not meant to take advantage of Obi-Wan's vulnerability, which was why he was so surprised when Obi-Wan broke from his embrace and when, for the first time that night, tears made their way down Obi-Wan's cheeks.
"Obi-Wan?"
"Because I have seen a future where I am master to the Chosen One, where I failed you, him and the Jedi; that future is a Dark one." Obi-Wan could not continue with words so he spoke to his bondmate's mind instead. 'It is a future I cannot bear to see or allow to exist.'
'What did you see?' Qui-Gon asked, fearing the answer.
'I cannot tell you that, Qui-Gon.'
And for that a small part of the Jedi master was glad.
"Come here, Obi-Wan," Qui-Gon said as he reached out to his bondmate. "I'm sorry my question hurts you so."
Obi-Wan returned to his lover's arms, relieved to be back within their comforting strength.
"Let's get some rest," Qui-Gon suggested and Obi-Wan wordlessly agreed. He shed his cloak and walked back to the bed, lying down amongst the tousled sheets. Sighing and knowing that breaking the silence may make things worse, Qui-Gon, too, returned to the bed.
Obi-Wan did not get the peaceful slumber he had hoped for, instead his dreams were invaded by the vision of a future where Darkness ruled the galaxy and where the Jedi were no more. Qui-Gon tried to guard Obi-Wan's dreams as much as he could, but a part of his lover's mind was forever shielded from him; a place where the Shadow protected all that he had seen, protected all that only he would ever see because of his Force-guided intervention.
The night passed for the two Jedi; morning came and with it the rising sun and the light of day. It also brought with it the saying of farewells.
"Will I see you again, beloved?" Qui-Gon asked, Obi-Wan's troubled night shaking his calm resolve.
"Of course."
Qui-Gon did not ask when and Obi-Wan did not offer any answer to the unasked question. Both knew time for them was a gift granted by the Force only when it could.
"Good bye, Obi-Wan."
Obi-Wan did not say farewell, he only bowed his head to his master and then turned, walking away, melting into the crowd that passed them on the walkway. As Obi-Wan disappeared from the Jedi master's sight, so too did he disappear from his mind.
Qui-Gon returned to the Jedi Temple and his life as a Jedi master. When he reached his quarters he found Anakin there already, preparing first meal.
"Did you have a nice evening with your friends, Padawan?"
"Yes, Master," Anakin answered, continuing to lay the table. "How is Obi-Wan?"
"He is fine."
"He didn't come and see me," the young Jedi said casually.
"He didn't have long."
"I understand." And Anakin did. Qui-Gon could sense through the bond the boy's regret at not seeing his friend, but also his acceptance of the situation.
"A mission we have for you."
Not a week had passed since Obi-Wan's visit when Qui-Gon had received the summons from Mace for him and Anakin to appear before the Council. There they now stood, receiving their first mission briefing as a master-apprentice team. Qui-Gon could feel excitement surge through Anakin as Yoda spoke. He smiled at his youthful enthusiasm. The mission was a simple matter, which was usual for first missions, but this did nothing to curb Qui-Gon's padawan's anticipation. They were to bear witness to a marriage that would join two houses of a planet where the Jedi had brokered a settlement millennia ago.
Qui-Gon listened passively until Mace issued a direct Council order that was unrelated to the current mission.
"Upon your return," the highly respected Jedi began. "We will require your decision on whether you wish to accept our invitation to join the Jedi Council."
Qui-Gon heard Mace's words and was preparing himself to argue their order, as part of him was angry with them for forcing the issue, especially in front of his apprentice. However the rest of him realised he had been procrastinating on making a decision. He let the argument drop before he even began it, admitting at least to himself that he had avoided the decision long enough.
"Yes, Masters," was all he said, and upon seeing the surprised look on half the Council members' faces when he had not argued the issue, he suddenly understood Obi-Wan's perverse pleasure at deliberately baiting the Council.
"May the Force be with you," Mace dismissed them with the usual parting words, but Qui-Gon was sure the other Jedi, behind his scowl, was thinking that the Shadow was having a bad influence on their resident maverick. To be a loose cannon was one thing, but another Jedi like Obi-Wan was another matter entirely. Qui-Gon had not meant to vex the Council on purpose, but decided that borrowing some of Obi-Wan's more irritating habits may be a good idea.
The master-apprentice team walked from the Council chamber and went to prepare for their first official mission together.
"I cannot possibly be in any danger here."
Qui-Gon did not know what caused him to speak out into an empty, silent room, but something had stirred within him and he knew that the Shadow was there to hear his words.
"You're getting better at that, beloved," said a very familiar voice. "Unless I'm..."
Qui-Gon turned to the owner of the voice as he trailed off into doubt. Qui-Gon cursed himself a little for not thinking before he spoke, forgetting momentarily Obi-Wan's fear of his diminishing senses.
"No, Obi-Wan, it was not you," Qui-Gon hoped he was being reassuring as his bondmate still had not dropped the shields he had around his end of the bond. "Part of me just knew you were close."
Obi-Wan smiled a little to hear that and he finally let go of his grasp on the Force, allowing his master to sense his presence properly.
"You are well?" Qui-Gon enquired, as he swept his gaze over his lover who, this time, was not dressed in the usual Jedi garb. Instead he wore tight fitting black leathers with numerous weapons on display. His hair was loose and fell wildly about his shoulders.
"I am well," Obi-Wan confirmed. "And you are right, there is no danger to you here."
"Another quick visit?" Qui-Gon asked hopefully, a feral grin briefly broke out across his face.
"Better that that, beloved." Obi-Wan walked slowly closer, swaying his hips just so, knowing the effect it would have on his bondmate. "I have come to give you and your apprentice a lift home."
"And then?"
"Barring any emergencies, I shall be staying for a while."
Obi-Wan was now close enough for Qui-Gon to touch, however he did not reach out, wanting to draw out the moment, holding off the joyful sensation of touching his lover, until Obi-Wan came to him completely.
There was barely an inch between them when the lavish apartment doors burst open and a very excited Jedi apprentice barrelled in.
"Obi-Wan!" he squealed.
"Anakin," Obi-Wan said, smiling, glad to see the young Jedi well. "How are you?"
"This place is awesome," Anakin told him by way of answer.
Qui-Gon had been right about his initial assessment of the mission. It had been simple and a formality. For Anakin it had been the most thrilling few days of his life.
"Are you here for long?" the boy asked courteously, trying not to get his hopes up.
"I will attend the final banquet with you tonight and then I shall pilot you both back to Coruscant."
"And then?"
"After that we'll just have to trust the Force."
"I can do that." With the formalities out the way, Anakin ran to Obi-Wan and gave him a brief, tight hug. "I'm glad you're here, Obi-Wan. Master misses you when you're gone."
"And I miss him," Obi-Wan told the boy solemnly while trying not to smile at his bondmate.
'He misses you too, Obi-Wan.'
'I can see that, Master.'
'Just making sure you realise how loved you are.'
'I realise.' Obi-Wan finally gave in and let his smile blossom onto his face.
"You have to change," Anakin's abrupt observation brought the bondmates back to the present. "You don't look like a Jedi at all."
"I shall, Anakin. Why don't you work on your lessons while Master Jinn helps me."
Anakin gave both the older Jedi a look that showed them he did not believe them, despite their best innocent faces.
"Okay, but don't be too long."
"Padawan," Qui-Gon's voice held a warning.
"Sorry, Master."
The bondmates watched the apprentice scurry off to his own room before they turned to the second, larger bedroom of the suite that the Jedi had been provided with.
"Wow," Obi-Wan said upon entering the room that Qui-Gon had been using. "How come when I was your apprentice we never stayed in places like this?"
"This is our first mission together, Obi-Wan."
"My first mission consisted of hutts, dragons and corrupt miners."
"That's because you're a trouble magnet."
Obi-Wan decided he could not argue with that. It certainly seemed true when he had been a padawan, and since his knighting, his duty essentially meant he went looking for trouble. Obi-Wan put down the small pack that he had brought from his ship and then proceeded to explore the room and its opulent, private fresher.
Qui-Gon watched him with some amusement.
"You're worse than Anakin."
"Am not," Obi-Wan's disagreement was followed by a squeal which contradicted his statement. "Real water showers."
"Obi-Wan..."
"Join me?" Obi-Wan stood in the doorway between the bedroom and the fresher, undoing the snaps on his leather jacket. As more skin was revealed, Qui-Gon could see that Obi-Wan was wearing nothing beneath it.
"Okay, but we mustn't be long."
Obi-Wan smirked and turned back into the fresher. Qui-Gon followed him in, removing his own tunics as he went.
Qui-Gon stood naked, content for the time being to watch his bondmate under the water spray. Obi-Wan had always been sensual and by the way he was groaning it was clear to the Jedi master that his lover had been without the luxury of a real hot water shower for some time.
The entire image was evocative and finally Qui-Gon could resist no more and stepped forward into the cubical and kissed Obi-Wan passionately, only dimly aware of the warm water cascading about them.
"Mmm, Qui-Gon," Obi-Wan let out another enthusiastic moan that went straight to Qui-Gon's groin. "I love you."
"And I you," Qui-Gon managed to get out between breathy kisses.
Obi-Wan broke from the kiss, giving his lover a hungry look, and then he dropped to his knees.
"Ah, Obi-Wan, we don't have time for..." Qui-Gon did not finish his token resistance as Obi-Wan's mouth engulfed his half erect penis. Obi-Wan's talented mouth quickly awakened it to its full length and it was not long before Qui-Gon was coming loudly into his lover's mouth.
Obi-Wan swallowed quickly and happily. Warm, insistent hands pulled him up from his knees to stand once more under the steamy hot shower spray. He was kissed once more, however this time it was slow and lazy. Gentle hands stoked his body, cleaning away sweat and dirt from long, hard missions and the tension of time spent from his bondmate fell from Obi-Wan's muscles. He allowed the loving touch, the luxury and pampering, knowing that Qui-Gon needed it as much as he did.
'Who knows when I'll have you with me again,' Qui-Gon whispered into his mind as he rinsed the soapsuds from his hair.
Before long both Jedi were clean and could no longer put off stepping from the fresher and back into their roles as Jedi.
"Soon we'll be back at the Temple," Qui-Gon reminded Obi-Wan, sensing his reluctance to dress in his traditional Jedi tunics.
"Will it be better there, do you think?"
"Better? Maybe not, but different and perhaps easier. One day, Obi-Wan, the Order will know their Shadow and then..." Qui-Gon trailed off, unsure how to finish.
"It'll be better," Obi-Wan finished for him. "It's a hope, Qui-Gon, one that is almost tangible. That's how I got through five years of being alone: I held onto simple hopes."
"Like the soulbond?"
"Yes, just like that."
"A different hope then, for a different time, one I can share in."
The Jedi dressed and met Anakin in the living room of the lavish apartment they had been gifted with. The padawan was more than ready to leave for the evening festivities, never realising the struggle that warred in Obi-Wan to be a Jedi in the open nor seeing within his master the hidden fear that Obi-Wan was slowly being pulled apart by the demands placed upon him.
Chapter 11
Obi-Wan was bored. He had forgotten how tedious these types of missions could be. Qui-Gon had introduced him to the hosts of the last celebratory banquet for the royal wedding and he had offered his own congratulations to the very happy couple. Now, he stood at the rear of the great hall, watching the other guests dancing and drinking. He could not entirely shake free of his need to be concealed in shadows, but it was not this that caused his boredom. No, it was the tiresome, political, bureaucratic conversations that filtered over to him. Since his knighting, Obi-Wan had found himself becoming increasingly disillusioned with parts of the Republic, especially the Senate. A number of times one politician or another had tried to draw him into a debate.
He steadfastly refused.
Instead he tried to focus on the dancers and found himself beginning to daydream.
"Would you like to dance?"
"It's funny you should ask that, Qui-Gon, I was just thinking that."
"I know, I could see it also." Qui-Gon took Obi-Wan's hand. "Would you dance with me, beloved?"
"Yes."
Qui-Gon led his partner to the dance floor and gracefully swept them through the already dancing couples. Not long after they had joined the foray, the tempo of the music slowed and the dance became a more intimate melody; soft and beautiful.
The dancers slowed and moved closer. Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan in their midst, fell in sync with the new dance, gladly absorbed in each other, enjoying the dance together, their first since becoming bonded.
"You're very good at this, Qui-Gon."
"Years of experience."
"I'm sure," Obi-Wan teased. "Years of sweeping kings and queens off their feet."
"As I remember it, Obi-Wan you seemed to find equal pleasure in cavorting with the servants in the stables."
Obi-Wan let out a surprised and happy laugh that carried a little over the guests, who smiled to see their Jedi guests so plainly enjoying themselves.
"It was only the once," Obi-Wan defended the happy memory, remembering Qui-Gon's amused face and the king's scandalised one when they had discovered Obi-Wan and the stable hand in the morning when they were preparing for their morning ride. "Will you ever let me live that down?"
Qui-Gon appeared to give this some serious consideration.
"No," he said at last. "I don't think so."
Obi-Wan continued to smile, despite knowing that his master would never let him forget some of the more embarrassing times of his apprenticeship. The moment was perfect, they were in love and for a short time would be together, what could be better?
"Obi-Wan, it's time for bed," Qui-Gon called to his lover from the very large double bed that dominated their guest room.
"I'll be right out."
"Padawan, get out of that shower this instant." Qui-Gon used his lover's old title, suddenly feeling like his master again, remembering the times that the boy seemed to spend what seemed like forever in the fresher.
"Ten more minutes."
"Obi-Wan," Qui-Gon said, using the same warning tone he now used on Anakin.
"Fine," was the sulky compliance and soon after Qui-Gon heard the water shut off.
'My little hedonist.'
'Bite me.'
Qui-Gon rolled onto his side and propped his head up on his arms as he watched his lover come out of the fresher.
"Maybe later."
"Maybe now," Obi-Wan demanded, still pretending to pout over his abruptly ended shower. "You did drag me from my nice warm shower."
"So I did. Well then," Qui-Gon said, smiling gently, "You'd better come here."
Obi-Wan climbed onto the double bed on which his lover reclined, determined to have his own way now that he had been drawn from the fresher.
Early the next morning, the three Jedi said their farewells to their hosts and left the peaceful planet.
"This your ship, Obi-Wan?"
"Yes, Anakin."
Obi-Wan studied the padawan as he in turn studied his ship. The apprentice did not look very impressed.
"It may not look like much, but I promise you, its engines have some phenomenal upgrades."
Anakin continued to look at the ship, now a little sceptical.
"Well, if you feel that way about it, I guess you won't want a turn at the helm."
The knight watched closely, masking his amusement, as the padawan's face morphed through several emotions in rapid succession. Dismay replaced the sceptical, faintly disgusted look which then quickly dissolved into what Obi-Wan had dubbed the 'puppy-dog look'.
"Please, Obi-Wan," the young Jedi begged, drawing out the 'e' in please in his desperation to convince his friend to fly his ship. "It looks wizard. Honest."
Obi-Wan smirked.
"Well, I don't know."
"Please."
'Obi-Wan,' Qui-Gon interrupted his padawan's begging.
'Yes, Qui-Gon?'
'Please resist the urge to play with my padawan's mind,' Qui-Gon asked his bondmate, a little dismayed to discover that no one was safe from Obi-Wan's odd sense of humour or his new, favourite hobby.
"Okay, Anakin, for a short while."
"Yippee!"
'You always ruin my fun,' Obi-Wan accused as he watched the now happy apprentice enter the vessel.
'That's what masters are for.'
Qui-Gon was sure he was going to regret saying that as he saw the look of glee on his bondmate's face.
"I'm going to remember that for next time 'the little troll', oh I'm sorry, I meant Master Yoda, does something you don't like."
Qui-Gon tried not to groan, but unfortunately he did not manage to prevent the mental echo from reaching Obi-Wan. He faintly regretted teasing Obi-Wan about the stable boy when he saw Obi-Wan's glee turn into a smug smile.
'I win.'
'For now,' Qui-Gon threatened darkly.
'Oh, I'm scared.'
'You should be.'
Laughter drifted through the bond and through the air as Obi-Wan left Qui-Gon standing on the landing ramp, wondering why he was fated to raise such head strong, irritating, cheeky, impertinent,
'Don't forget impudent,'
Impudent apprentices with bizarre senses of humour.
'Just lucky I guess.'
As Qui-Gon followed the other two Jedi onto the ship he could not help but agree with Obi-Wan.
'Yes, beloved, I am indeed lucky.'
Love saturated the bond, flowing freely from both its ends, consuming, for the time being, all fears and worries that yet lingered in their minds.
The journey was brief and uneventful. When they reached Coruscant, the master and apprentice went immediately before the Council while Obi-Wan saw to his ship. Qui-Gon waited patiently with his padawan in the Council's anteroom, considering the words his bondmate had said to him before they had landed.
"Have you made your decision?"
Qui-Gon turned from the view screen, which was now dominated by the city planet, to look at his companion. His face showed his obvious confusion.
"About the Council; I know that they are forcing you to decide," Obi-Wan clarified.
Qui-Gon let out a long, weary sigh. He had not wanted this decision; he did not like the options whichever way he chose.
"Qui-Gon?"
"I cannot decide, Obi-Wan," the master confessed. "Every time I think I've settled on a choice, I think of a better reason for the other."
"If that is the case, if there is no way to decide through reason, then why not do as you feel is right?"
"Do what I want, you mean?"
Obi-Wan shrugged. He was not a Jedi bound by the Order's normal principles. He did his duty, as any Jedi should, but beyond that he was free in the galaxy. He had returned to the Temple, come back from the dead and bonded to his old master; these things had all been his dreams, apart from his duty as a Jedi.
"Why not? You serve the Republic, is it not best to do it in a way that best suits you?"
"I'm not you, Obi-Wan."
"Never said you were, and what works for me may not work for you, but for once, Qui-Gon, can you not try and see life my way?"
The doors to the Council chamber opened and Qui-Gon was pulled from his memories to discover that the time to decide had come. He did not know why the choice had become such a great one, but something in the Force was telling him not to take the situation too lightly.
With resignation, he beckoned his padawan to him and together they entered the Council chamber.
Master Yoda watched his grand-padawan and his apprentice leave the chamber, searching though the currents within the Force as to the consequences of Qui-Gon's decision.
"You have something to report?" Yoda heard Mace ask. He looked up to see the emerging figure who stepped from the concealing shadows into full view of the Jedi Council.
"Only to say I have returned."
"No problems you have had?"
Obi-Wan looked at the ancient Jedi; both studied the other intently, searching for something neither could explain. The Shadow instinctively found himself drawing inward, suspicious; something was not right, not a lie, but a concealment of some kind.
"Nothing the Council needs concern themselves with."
The Council watched as the Order's most respected master and its most formidable weapon stared each other down.
"But?"
Obi-Wan did not back down, he had no desire to discuss his failing senses with the Council; instead he returned to another concern that still remained.
"Danger lingers still at the back of my mind."
"For Qui-Gon?"
"Yes."
"Always in motion the future is." Yoda did not finish the thought, knowing that it was unnecessary; the Shadow knew that better than anyone and the Jedi master knew his words offered little comfort. Yoda continued to study the young Jedi, but this time he looked upon the Shadow, not as a Councillor to the Order, but as a fellow Jedi. He clearly saw the burden that rested upon the young shoulders and in his mind Yoda had seen the tension within Qui-Gon as he had told the Council his decision.
"Here you will be staying?" Yoda now asked kindly.
"For now," which was the only commitment the Warrior could give to anyone for anything.
Yoda suddenly felt his eight hundred years. Darkness was spreading, the Light side of the Force seem to be diminishing, although only those finely attuned to it could feel it. Balance was shifting, away from the Light, and the Shadow stood before the Council suspicious of their secrecy. Something had to be done.
"Fluctuations in the Force there has been," Yoda told Obi-Wan, aware of the surprised looks on the other Council members' faces; they had decided to keep the information to themselves for the moment. "The Dark side grows strong."
"And the Jedi's strength is failing," Obi-Wan said.
For a brief moment fear was shown on all the Council's faces.
"You have felt this fluctuation?"
Obi-Wan did not answer Mundi. He bowed to the Council and turned to leave.
"Obi-Wan," Mace called him back, like Yoda, desperate to try and breach the gap that seemed to be widening between them and the Warrior.
Obi-Wan did not turn to him, but spoke over his shoulder.
"Qui-Gon made the right decision," he told them. "You need him out there."
"We need you out there too, Knight Kenobi," Mundi once again spoke.
"And that is where I will be."
Obi-Wan drifted back into shadows and was once more lost to the Council. Yoda watched him go unhappily. The Order was losing their most needed weapon, all because the Council did not trust him. He glanced at Yaddle, who was also thoughtfully looking at the place where the Warrior had disappeared. The bondmates had accepted and understood what their duties meant, but now they were struggling to find a way to live with it. Yoda decided he would speak to Qui-Gon and knew that Yaddle would seek out Obi-Wan or at least would wait for him to come to her; the Shadow was not found, the Council must remember, he went were he would, not where they ordered.
"Master Yoda?" Qui-Gon opened his door to find the ancient master waiting patiently in the hall. "Come in."
Yoda shuffled over the threshold into the apartment. Qui-Gon's home had always been a welcoming place. Only twice had the air become cold and stale as Qui-Gon had tried to run from his hurt. Yoda remembered both those times, when Xanatos had turned to the Dark and when Obi-Wan had died, and saw that despite Qui-Gon's obvious weariness and Obi-Wan's tension, their home was still warm and inviting and for that Yoda was hopeful.
"Returned yet Obi-Wan has?" Yoda asked as he made his way to what he thought of as 'his' chair.
"No," Qui-Gon followed his guest and sat on the sofa opposite his grand-master, waiting for Yoda to say what he had come to say.
"Concerned I am."
"Master Yoda," Qui-Gon interrupted, wanting to prevent Yoda from once again repeating the fears of the Council.
"Interrupt you should not, come to fight I have not, came to listen I did." Yoda's voice began sharp with his initial reprimand, but lost its sharp edge as he continued. "Concerned I am for you, Qui-Gon, and your bondmate."
"We're fine."
"Fine you may be now, fine you will not be."
"We are trying."
"There is no try," Yoda huffed out, irritated.
Qui-Gon held on to his irritated sigh, knowing it would upset the old master still further. He had managed to get Yoda to raise his voice in impatience twice in less than a minute.
"Accepted you both have your roles, but pulling you apart it is."
"I know, I worry for Obi-Wan; he feels so torn."
"Know you the reason you do for this?"
Qui-Gon did not want to admit that he and his lover had not discussed the root of their problems properly, nor did he wish to lie to the powerful master. So he remained silent, hoping that Yoda would respect his wish not to comment.
"Hmmm, difficult you knew it would be," Yoda went on, hearing more in Qui-Gon's silence that the other Jedi had wanted to admit. "Find a balance you both must, or lose you both the Jedi may, lose each other you will."
Within the Blossom Garden, beneath a tree that's life had fled it, another diminutive, ancient Jedi master spoke to another stubborn bondmate.
"Hide from the Council you do."
"They... You lie to me." Obi-Wan was not in the mood for Yaddle's interference. Through the years her counsel had been a source of great comfort to the young Jedi Warrior, but since he had bonded to his master, Obi-Wan found the Council's constant interference, however well meaning, was beginning to wear on his patience.
"Hide from your bondmate you do also."
"It's none of your business," Obi-Wan flung out, for once allowing his anger to colour his words with scorn.
"Your enemy I am not, nor is the Council."
Obi-Wan looked at Yaddle, saw her earnest, honest eyes, her slumped shoulders, and admitted defeat. He could not avoid this conversation, even if it was what he desired more that anything else.
"I feel torn," he said, gazing at the corpse of the tree that had been bonded to him in his youth.
"As bondmate and Shadow?" Yaddle asked, walking to stand at Obi-Wan's side, joining him in his study of the dead tree.
"No, only as the Shadow."
"Understand I do not," Yaddle admitted.
"Danger lingers on for Qui-Gon still, I can feel it constantly, but I can find no source. I feel I should be protecting him and then I get a vision of another and then..."
"Feel torn you do," Yaddle finished for her companion, finally understanding the dilemma that lay in the heart of the Jedi protector. "Told Qui-Gon of this you have?"
"In a manner of speaking."
"Obi-Wan!"
"I've told him I feel danger to him still, but he doesn't know, or at least I haven't told him how divided I feel." Obi-Wan inwardly cringed as he voiced his cowardice. These were not the actions of a great Warrior, or a faithful bondmate.
"Tell him you must."
"I know," he said. And the Shadow did, he had known that from the beginning.
"And tell the Council you should what you are hiding."
"I don't trust the Council."
If Yaddle had hoped to catch Obi-Wan at a vulnerable moment her plan had failed. Despite his problems and fears concerning his relationship with Qui-Gon and his duties as Warrior, the bitter taste of distrust and lies between the Council and himself was not forgotten.
"Trust you we do," Yaddle told him as she turned to leave. She was almost out of earshot when finally she heard words of hope that reconciliation was possible,
"I'll think about it," was all Obi-Wan said. But it was enough.
A cycle passed and once more the bondmates found themselves separated, although this time it was Qui-Gon who was leaving. Obi-Wan watched Qui-Gon and Anakin's transport until it disappeared into the atmosphere. He could still feel his lover in his mind, not closing the link because he was still Knight Kenobi, not yet the Shadow.
Obi-Wan did not go with them, choosing instead to spend some time at the Temple, allowing himself time to become reacquainted with being around other Jedi. Qui-Gon's and Anakin's mission was again not a hard one and their destination was only a day's travel out from Coruscant. Although the distance was too great to be able to talk to Qui-Gon, the bondmates could still sense each other.
Obi-Wan spent a day of quiet relaxation, spending time with Bant and Siri, walking in the gardens and finally seeing Garen and Reef for the first time in five years. It was as he returned to his shared quarters that for the second time in his life he was gifted with a vision that stopped his heart cold.
Danger.
It rang in his hears. The call was not yet a shout, but it was an insistent echo that told of death if he did not act quickly. It was not this that spurred Obi-Wan into action, it was not the ferocity by which the vision took him, but rather the sight of a terrified Anakin Skywalker watching as his master was murdered before him.
Danger.
The Force had barely repeated its summons when Obi-Wan was already on a ship, powering up the light drive, desperate to reach his lover as soon as he was able. In his haste he told no one of his departure and it was not until morning that the Council discovered the absence of Knight Kenobi.
The Shadow answered no attempts to contact him, so all the Council could do was wait on Coruscant and wonder what had been so dire that the Warrior had left so abruptly, with no message left to them at least informing them where he was going or who he was going after.
Privately, Mace thought on his missing friend, but it was not the Shadow he feared for. He stood beneath the bowers of a dead blossom and feared for his old friend, Qui-Gon Jinn.
Chapter 12
The presence of Obi-Wan in Qui-Gon's mind diminished as the ship that carried him and his padawan left Coruscant and entered lightspeed. The Jedi master did not allow his apprentice to see the frustration that he felt for his lover, he did not think that Anakin needed any more confusion and disruption in his life. However, inside his own mind, Qui-Gon privately allowed his irritation to blossom.
The master thought back on the argument he and Obi-Wan had had before the ship was due to depart. It had not occurred to Qui-Gon that Obi-Wan would not be accompanying him on his most recent mission. Obi-Wan himself had said that when his duties permitted he would be by Qui-Gon and Anakin's side. And yet, here he was, heading towards a volatile situation with the Chosen One while his Shadow remained at the Temple.
'Obi-Wan,' he whispered through the bond, knowing his lover would be unable to hear him. 'Why?'
Qui-Gon already knew the answer, he had been told firmly the evening before when Obi-Wan had told him he was staying behind. However no matter how much his head understood, his heart did not.
'And in truth,' Qui-Gon admitted only to himself. 'My head doesn't understand either.'
The master knelt in his quarters trying desperately to find his centre and not think on Obi-Wan and what was keeping him from his bondmate's side. Qui-Gon did not think it was because Obi-Wan wanted to become reacquainted with the other Jedi, nor did he really believe it was Obi-Wan's fear, although the other Jedi did feel fear, keenly so. No, Qui-Gon believed that it was Obi-Wan's way of dealing with his feelings of being torn between two duties.
'And in typical Obi-Wan fashion, he is choosing to rebel against his own feelings.'
Qui-Gon loved his old apprentice, dearly and passionately, but at times the other man made his head spin with his bloody mindedness.
'And I am just as bad,' Qui-Gon allowed, resigned to the fact that he and Obi-Wan were destined to clash for the rest of their lives.
"Master?"
Qui-Gon was glad of Anakin's interruption, although he did not show it, he had found some peace with Obi-Wan's decision and now wished to focus on something else, Anakin's presence gave him that focus.
"Yes, Padawan?" he asked the boy as he opened his eyes to find the apprentice knelt before him.
"Where are we going?"
"A planet named Hydra, we have been requested to represent the Republic at the marriage of the heir to the throne and her betrothed."
"Again?"
Qui-Gon chuckled at Anakin's whine.
"A Jedi's life is not all excitement, my young apprentice and soon you will wish for such a 'boring' mission." Qui-Gon could tell that Anakin did not think he would ever wish for a boring mission, but the boy seemed content, at least for now.
"Hydra is still a monarchy," Qui-Gon continued. "A peaceful one at that, but it wasn't always so. About one hundred and fifty years ago the planet was almost torn apart by civil war; the people felt that the ruling class was not serving them well."
"So why didn't they get rid of them?"
"Many worlds have, but the Hydra are a traditional, conservative people. It was decided that the royal line would be allowed to continue, but only if the ruler married a commoner. And so it has been and while their solution is not a common one, it is one that works well for them."
"So, we'll be there as witnesses?"
"The Jedi traditionally do more than that," Qui-Gon explained, pleased that his padawan was taking an interest without being forced to. "We will be escorting Blyne, the Princess's intended, to the Palace from his home."
"Will there be any problems?"
"None that I or the planet's security has foreseen."
And so the master-apprentice team made themselves ready for the mission that lay ahead, not realising that soon their peaceful mission would become deadly.
"Honoured Jedi, welcome to Hydra."
The man who greeted Qui-Gon and his apprentice as they walked down the boarding ramp was short and large, he was gruff and his clothes ragged, however his welcome was genuine enough.
"Greetings," Qui-Gon said. "I'm Master Qui-Gon Jinn and this is my apprentice, Padawan Skywalker."
The man, whose name was Dylon and was the father of the groom, led the Jedi away from the ship. Once they were a safe distance away, the vessel took off and headed for the Palace where the pilot would wait for them until the wedding was complete and they were ready to return home.
"Please forgive my appearance," Dylon said as he ushered the two Jedi towards his home. "But we are so busy preparing for the wedding that I scarcely have time to eat let alone dress in my formal robes every time a new guest arrives. All those sashes and tunics take so long to get into."
Anakin found that he liked Dylon; he was jolly and friendly and although his words could have been taken as an insult, his manner was such that you could not take offence.
"Quit understandable," Qui-Gon reassured their host, smiling warmly at the shorter man. "I expect that your entire household his preparing for tomorrow."
"The household?" Dylon gave a chuckle. "Try the entire village."
It was then that Anakin noticed that most of the people in the street were either hurrying towards or away from a single house, the same house they were also headed towards.
Dylon and his son Blyne lived in a quiet rural village situated on the edge of the royal hunting forest. Most in the village were employed in some way by the royal house, which was how Blyne and the princess had met. It had been love at first sight and although the couple were a little younger than normal for the heir and chosen to get married, neither side saw any reason to delay a marriage so obviously coveted by the two involved.
In the morning, Blyne and his Jedi escort, followed by family and other villagers, would make their way to the Palace where Princess Fi awaited her husband.
"Come, come," Dylon hurried the Jedi inside his home. "Come meet Blyne."
All had been going as planned when the explosion struck. Qui-Gon, Anakin, Blyne, Dylon and two other family members were seated in a speeder making their way through the forest, followed by dozens of other speeders, when from the ground a missile was launched and struck their left side.
"Brace yourselves," cried the driver. "We're going to crash."
The driver managed to keep control of the vehicle long enough to direct the speeder into a clearing, however he inevitably lost control and the occupants were thrown side to side as the speeder span and finally stopped with a jolt as it crashed into a tree.
"Is every one unharmed?" Qui-Gon asked, seeking out his apprentice with his eyes, to make sure the boy was unhurt. His question was met with shaky nods of heads and grunts of affirmation.
"What happened?" Blyne asked, sitting up, trying to see out the cracked front windscreen.
"Someone fired on us," the driver told him, unsympathetically.
"Why?" Blyne demanded, this time of his father, "No one objected to Fi and my joining."
"It would seem that someone did," Qui-Gon told him. "We had better get out of here before whoever attacked us decides to show up and make sure we're all dead."
The speeder's occupants cautiously left the crashed vehicle and headed for the cover of the trees.
"What about the others?" Dylon asked. "The other guests that were following?"
"We span pretty wildly as we went down," the driver told them all. "We are a long way off course, it'll take them time to find us."
"Far longer than it'll take our attackers to find us," Qui-Gon said. "We must head towards the Palace, hope that we run into the rescue party before we run into whoever it was that attacked the speeder."
The Jedi master looked at those gathered around the groom; not one face did not show fear.
"I am here to protect you," he reminded them. "I will not allow harm to come to you."
The five Hydra and two Jedi set off into the forest, heading towards the safety of the Palace, knowing that somewhere out there someone was trying to kill them.
Obi-Wan was annoyed, no he was angry, angry with himself.
'I should have gone with him,' he cursed himself. 'I let my fear get in the way.'
Obi-Wan piloted his ship down into the Hydra atmosphere.
'Now, you're punishing me aren't you,' Obi-Wan spoke to the Force, knowing he would get no answer. 'Punishing me for not listening.'
In his mind, the Shadow saw the Speeder that carried his bondmate as it was shot down and hurtle towards the ground.
'Damn it,' he swore. He knew that the crash was not what ended Qui-Gon's life but he had hoped to get to his lover before the bounty hunters.
'Now, I'm going to have to hurry along and I hate that.'
Obi-Wan landed the small, compact ship. He opened the cockpit and jumped from the fighter and landed soundlessly, lightsabre in hand. There before him was the twisted remains of the speeder. Qui-Gon was ahead of him, but not far, he could catch him; but could he catch him before the hunters that even as he stood in the clearing were closing in on his bondmate did? That was the question. Sparing no more thought for the crash site, Obi-Wan gathered the Force and ran into the forest, becoming a blur as the Force surged through him, carrying him faster than any human could move.
Qui-Gon stretched his senses to their maximum, trying to get some sense of their pursuers. He felt nothing and then he felt... something.
"Anakin?" he asked, halting immediately. "Do you sense that?"
"Sense what, Master?" The boy was clearly puzzled by his master's behaviour.
Qui-Gon concentrated and finally recognised what he felt. He felt a void within the Force; where the Force should be there was nothing, no trace of Light or Dark.
'Obi-Wan?' he asked into the silent bond, but received no answer.
"Wait here," he told his companions. "I will return soon."
Qui-Gon left the six confused survivors and moved off, heading back the way they had come, back towards Obi-Wan.
The Jedi master had not been walking long when he saw movement up ahead. He paused, unsure if it was Obi-Wan or a more dangerous pursuer. He crouched low, trying to see whatever it was more clearly. He knew that Obi-Wan, the void within the Force, was close, but now that he was almost on top of the presence he could not pin point its location.
He saw movement up ahead once more, which was why he did not see the bounty hunter spring from the trees to his left. The would be killer held a blaster pointed directly at Qui-Gon's head and his shot would have found its mark if not for the blue blade of a lightsabre that intercepted it seemingly from nowhere. The bounty hunter had enough time to show fear on his face before the same blade plunged through his chest and pierced his heart.
"Obi-Wan," Qui-Gon said in a breathless greeting.
"You idiot," Obi-Wan shouted, angry beyond words. He had been angry with himself as he had made his way to his beloved, but now he was furious with Qui-Gon. "What were you thinking?"
"I sensed you, or at least the space where you should be," Qui-Gon explained, not understanding why Obi-Wan was so angry.
"Qui-Gon, I'm the Shadow; if I'm here and still hiding myself from you what do you think that means?"
Qui-Gon immediately saw his error. He had not thought that Obi-Wan's presence was in response to a threat to him or Anakin. It had not occurred to him that it was the Shadow that was on Hydra not his lover.
"I'm sorry, Obi-Wan, I didn't think."
"Good," Obi-Wan grunted out. "Call Anakin, tell him to come here, we're leaving."
"Obi-Wan," Qui-Gon objected, not sure if Obi-Wan was being serious. "The others from the crash..."
"Are not in any danger," Obi-Wan interrupted.
"But they were attacked."
"No, Qui-Gon, you were attacked. You remember the bounty hunters from Tyron? Well, these are their replacements." Obi-Wan started walking towards where he sensed Anakin was waiting with the Hydras.
"Obi-Wan," Qui-Gon tried again, not quite believing Obi-Wan's words.
"For Force sake, Qui-Gon," Obi-Wan was incredulous. "I am the Jedi Protector and I'm telling you they are after you."
"Obi-Wan," Qui-Gon said once more, however this time his voice held something else, something that forced Obi-Wan to stop and turn to look at the other Jedi. "It doesn't matter, I can not abandon those I am sworn to protect."
Obi-Wan studied his lover and saw the stubborn look in his eyes. He could not fault the Jedi master, not really. It was his devotion to his duty that Obi-Wan loved about Qui-Gon the most. He had been honoured to call Qui-Gon his master, respected the older Jedi even when he disagreed with him. He knew that he could not now force the master to leave Hydra when there were still people to protect.
"You are the target, Qui-Gon, if you travel with them you'll make them a target, also."
"I know," Qui-Gon said. "Which is why you and I are going to go find the other bounty hunters before we rejoin them."
"Fine," Obi-Wan relented. "But you can tell them."
"Anakin?"
"Yes, Master?" Anakin answered his communicator hurriedly, surprised, but relieved to hear his master's voice.
"I need to speak to Dylon, can you give him your communicator?"
"Yes, Master," Anakin said again, obediently passing his communicator over to the groom's father.
"Master Jinn? What's happening? Where are you?"
"I've found one of the men tracing us, I'm going to attempt to find the others who attacked the speeder."
"But, what about us? You can't just leave us."
"You won't be in any danger as long as you stay together and stay where you are."
"Master Jinn," Dylon began to object, but Qui-Gon cut him off.
"You have to trust me, Dylon, I will explain everything when I can, but for now I need you to stay there and please make sure my apprentice does not try and do something... foolish."
"I will keep an eye on your apprentice, Master Jinn, but I expect a full explanation when you return."
"You'll have it. Thank you."
Dylon broke the connection and turned to see five anxious faces looking at him, waiting for guidance.
"Master Jinn says to wait," he told them simply.
"There," Qui-Gon said to Obi-Wan as he put away his communicator. "All done."
"I see you neatly side-stepped the issue of who it was that was being attacked," Obi-Wan observed, failing to conceal his amusement.
"It was the speeder that was attacked," Qui-Gon defended. "Shall we go?"
The two Jedi began to make their way through the trees, keeping alert for the bounty hunters.
"How long do you think it'll be before Anakin comes into the forest after us?" Obi-Wan asked his old master, scanning the trees up ahead, hoping to see one of their targets.
"Unlike my last apprentice, Anakin does as he is told."
Obi-Wan stopped searching the trees and turned to his companion.
"You don't really believe that, do you?"
"While he maybe reckless and tries to find loopholes in rules and orders, he does not blatantly disregard them."
"Am I suppose to find some hidden meaning in that?" Obi-Wan asked, trying to look innocent. He was not successful, Qui-Gon knew him far to well.
"Why don't you tell me about the bounty hunters? For example, why can't I sense them within the Force."
"They have injected nanites into their blood stream. I'm not sure how the technology works, but it's a bit like a Force collar, but instead of suppressing Force abilities, it cloaks a person's presence."
"A little like you do when you conceal your presence?"
"Yes, like that, but you don't need to be Force sensitive to be able to do it."
"Good," Qui-Gon said firmly.
"Good?" Obi-Wan did not see the up side to their situation.
"If it is like the way you cloak yourself, then we should be able to track them?"
"How?"
"It's easy, you just have to know what to look for," Qui-Gon explained, closing his eyes so that he could concentrate better. "When I first sensed your presence on Naboo, it wasn't you that I sensed but a void."
"I remember, I have since compensated."
"I know, but they cannot."
Obi-Wan smiled, finally seeing their advantage.
"Tracking them will be difficult," Qui-Gon went on. He stretched out his senses as far as he was able, and he could feel the void of six cloaked bounty hunters, for the presence was fleeting and hard to maintain a grip on. "I'm not sure if we can find them and fight them."
"Don't worry about that," Obi-Wan said.
Qui-Gon opened his eyes in time to see a predatory grin spread across Obi-Wan's face, while he pulled his lightsabre from his belt.
"You track them, I'll kill them."
Part of Qui-Gon was shocked by the ease with which his lover spoke of killing living creatures. He looked at his partner and remembered the vision he had of him on Naboo when he had fought the Sith Warrior. The young Jedi had been ablaze with the Force; Light and Dark sweeping around him in swirling competition. He looked like that again now, but this time Qui-Gon was close enough to see the death in Obi-Wan's eyes. He studied his bondmate for an instant before nodding.
"I will show you where they are through the bond."
"See you soon," Obi-Wan said cockily, before immersing himself completely into the Shadow. He loped off into the Forest, disappearing into the Force and out of Qui-Gon's sight.
'Obi-Wan?' Qui-Gon asked.
'I am still here, beloved.'
Qui-Gon knelt on the forest floor, and closing his eyes, he reached deep within his sense of the Force so that he could find those who intended to do him and his padawan harm. He spoke no words to Obi-Wan, but through the bond he led the Warrior to his enemies, leading shadowed death directly to the living. Qui-Gon kept his guilt at bay, knowing that he was giving each of the beings in the forest a death sentence; he wondered how Obi-Wan did it, mission after mission, being the bearer of death.
'It took me along time to accept it,' Obi-Wan's voice told him in his mind as the Shadow removed his blade from the corpse of one of the bounty hunters. 'It was Master Yaddle that reminded me that while I was death, I was life, too.'
Only one remained now, one soul who remained alive, seeking them, wanting to destroy them. With a shock, Qui-Gon realised that the bounty hunter was standing before him.
"No!" someone screamed.
Qui-Gon opened his eyes to see the final hunter ready to kill him where he knelt, while behind him his apprentice, Anakin, stood, frozen in horror as he watched his master be murdered. It happened so quickly, quicker than the Jedi master thought was even possible. A blur rushed from the trees, a voice whispered his own denial in his mind and then the bounty hunter lay dead; his neck snapped. Qui-Gon looked up into the stormy green eyes of the man's killer.
Obi-Wan stood over his final victim, panting, but he did not see Qui-Gon nor Anakin, instead he once more saw the vision he had witnessed on Coruscant, when he had seen his beloved master murdered as Anakin watched. It had been that vision and that vision alone that had made the Shadow flee back towards where he had left the man he was supposed to be protecting.
"Obi-Wan?" Qui-Gon tentatively asked, seeing in his mind also, Obi-Wan's vision, understanding how Obi-Wan came to be with him when he had not called to him to tell the Warrior where the final killer was. "That was the last."
"I know," Obi-Wan said, still unable to catch his breath. "You must go, you have a mission to complete."
"I can't leave you, Obi-Wan," Qui-Gon stood and started towards his bondmate. Obi-Wan seemed lost and in a haze and Qui-Gon had no intention of leaving his lover alone.
It was Qui-Gon moving towards him that shook Obi-Wan from his stupor. He saw his soulmate coming towards him and knew that for the present he could not stand to be touched by him; it had been too close. He needed time to find his centre.
"You will," he commanded as forcefully as he was able. He took one last look at Qui-Gon before gathering the Force to himself and running, running as far and as fast as he could.
Qui-Gon felt the stirring in the Force a moment before Obi-Wan disappeared from sight. The denial was on his lips, but never had a chance to be heard as Obi-Wan fled from him.
"Master?" Anakin asked, unsure of what had just happened.
"Come, Anakin, we have a mission to finish," Qui-Gon answered the boy's open question. He mentally pulled himself together before heading back towards those he and his apprentice had been charged to protect and escort to a wedding.
Chapter 13
"So, we returned to Dylon, Blyne and the other wedding guests and escorted them to the Palace. I explained as best as I could to the Hydra what had happened. After the ceremony we did not stay for the festivities; I felt we had worn out our welcome by that point."
"And with that the Council has to agree," Mundi said with a level of understanding that surprised Qui-Gon.
"The Queen contacted us," Mace explained. "Demanding a full explanation."
Qui-Gon nodded, not really surprised that the princess' mother had felt the need to contact the Order.
"Seen Obi-Wan since have you?" Yaddle's gently spoken question broke Qui-Gon from his thoughts and for a moment he was uncertain how to answer.
"No," was all he could say.
"Return he will," the ancient master reassured him, sensing that much had been left unsaid and that it concerned the Shadow and his most recent disappearing act.
"The Council sees no wrong doing for your part, Qui-Gon," Mundi began wrapping up the meeting, realising that for once it had not been Qui-Gon's rebellious nature that had been the cause of tension and confrontation on an easy mission. "You may return to your duties here at the Temple until you are assigned another mission."
"Thank you," Qui-Gon bowed to all the masters gathered and then left the Council chamber.
The Jedi who sat still, waited patiently and silently, expecting something more to happen, expecting a figure to step from concealing shadows. After a time they realised that the shadows remained undisturbed and that they would not receive an uninvited visitor to their meeting.
"Return he will," Yaddle repeated, this time reassuring the Council of the Jedi, not the lover of Obi-Wan Kenobi, that the Shadow had not deserted them. None of the other Jedi could tell how sure she was of her statement and truth be told, in her own heart, Yaddle was not sure how far she trusted her own words.
Qui-Gon collected Anakin from where he waited outside the Council chamber. The boy had not attended the meeting, Qui-Gon feeling that he did not need to hear some of the details of what had happened while Qui-Gon was with Obi-Wan. Anakin stood obediently and followed behind Qui-Gon, like a good padawan, all the way back to their quarters.
"Go to sleep Anakin," an exhausted Qui-Gon instructed. "We can discuss the mission tomorrow."
"Yes, Master," Anakin agreed and went happily enough to his room. The master was relieved to see that their mission had not worn on the boy as it had him or his bondmate. Mercifully, Anakin had been spared the worst of Hydra and the bounty hunters. He wondered though, what would happen when Obi-Wan returned; would they be as they were before?
Taking his own advice, Qui-Gon prepared for bed and settled himself in his and Obi-Wan's large empty bed, fully expecting to spend a long, restless night gazing at the ceiling, which was why it was a surprise when he awoke early the next morning feeling refreshed and alert. The reason for his restful slumber became apparent when he rolled over and came face to face with his bondmate who was sill nestled in the arms of sweet dreams.
Qui-Gon watched his lover for a time, seeing the lines of worry that remained even in sleep. He saw the lines of years past and while Obi-Wan was by no means old, he was older with a heavy responsibility.
'Obi-Wan?' he enquired along the bond, wanting the comfort of his soulmate's presence in his mind.
'Hmmm?' was the sleepy reply.
"Obi-Wan," Qui-Gon repeated, this time aloud. "Wake up."
"No."
Qui-Gon grinned, glad to see Obi-Wan had not been as adversely affected by the mission as he had feared. The grin turned into a wicked smile. Carefully, so as not to disturb Obi-Wan and alert the other Jedi as to his intentions, he reached out to take hold of a lock of Obi-Wan hair and then, ever so gently, stroked the end down his bedmate's nose.
Obi-Wan's nose twitched, but the Jedi showed no other signs of life.
Enjoying the teasing far more than he thought he really should, Qui-Gon repeated the action.
Obi-Wan's nose twitched again and then was followed by sniff.
Feeling a little more adventurous, Qui-Gon brushed the hair along an exposed ear lobe.
"Do you have a death wish?" a very perturbed voice asked and yet the speaker still refused to open his eyes.
"No, why do you ask?"
Qui-Gon then received what he had hoped to entice from his lover. Obi-Wan growled.
"Obi-Wan?"
"Yes, Qui-Gon?" Obi-Wan relented and finally opened his eyes. What the master saw in them filled his heart with relief. There was no pain, no sorrow and no fear and most importantly, there was no death; there was simply Obi-Was gazing back at him. Part of Qui-Gon was ashamed that he had feared what would lie in his lover's eyes, ashamed that he had half expected shadows to dance in stormy green eyes.
"I wanted to make sure that you were alright."
"Wanted to? As in don't anymore?"
"I can see that you are fine," Qui-Gon clarified.
"And us, Qui-Gon, are we fine?"
"More than fine." Qui-Gon at last leant forward and kissed his lover. He had wanted to do it the moment he had seen Obi-Wan in their bed, but had been unsure how welcome he would have been.
"He has returned," Yaddle told her companion, seeing her own relief reflected back at her in warm, brown eyes. "Where he should be he is."
"With Qui-Gon?" Mace asked, almost needlessly.
"With his bondmate," Yaddle confirmed. She looked up at dead, contorted branches of a blossom tree. "Soon he will realise that follow his heart he can, that part of being the Jedi protector this also is."
Mace did not entirely understand his companion's words, but he trusted them nonetheless. Yaddle knew the heart and mind of the Warrior second only to Qui-Gon. Mace may have been Obi-Wan's friend, but even he deferred to the diminutive master in matters concerning the fate of the Jedi's most necessary weapon.
"Soon," the ancient master repeated happily to herself, leaving the sight of the dead tree behind her as she returned to her quarters. Content for now that the Shadow's path was sure and that although distrust still lay between him and the Council, she was certain it had not become and would not become a breach so wide neither side would be able to repair the damage.
Barely a week had passed when once more Qui-Gon and Anakin were sent away, this time to a war torn world whose people were finally ready to discuss peace. Once more Obi-Wan stayed behind. Once again he could have gone with his master and quieted the voice in his mind that whispered threats, but he feared he was giving in to his heart rather than listening to his head. He feared that the danger that had threatened Qui-Gon on Hydra still lingered in his mind and he was allowing the past vision to cloud his future.
Alone and desolate, Obi-Wan once again tried to pick up the trail of the Darkness that infected Coruscant. Obi-Wan stood outside the Temple and waited for the taint to enter his senses. But nothing happened. For a moment Obi-Wan feared that once again his senses had deserted him, that his abilities as the Shadow had fled in the face of unknown causes, however he did not allow his panic or fear to override his better judgment. No, his senses had not diminished; he could still sense all the other Jedi, could trace all their Force signatures through the web of the Force. Something else then had changed.
Obi-Wan was not naïve or foolish enough to believe that the Darkness had utterly gone, that it had some how been unknowingly defeated, instead he knew that it was hiding. It still polluted the Republic centre, but now it was more careful of its presence, as if it knew something or someone was close to finding its source.
'Yes,' Obi-Wan whispered into the Force. 'You should fear me, I am coming for you.'
Obi-Wan knew that he was making it personal, that his hunt for the Sith was not solely for the benefit of all Jedi. When he left Qui-Gon on Hydra he had not abandoned the planet straight away, instead he had gone searching for the answer to the mystery of the bounty hunters that had targeted his old master not once, but twice now.
It was the Darkness that had sent the bounty hunters after Qui-Gon, of that Obi-Wan was now sure. The use of Force cloaks certainly showed someone familiar with the ways of the Force, but more than that, the Shadow in Obi-Wan's heart could sense the taint that surrounded the killers, a taint that was more than just that of a lifetime spent in the pursuit of death for money.
The Sith, it seemed, had also had a vision of a dark future just as Obi-Wan had, and he, too, had seen that for such a future Qui-Gon Jinn could not live. Before Naboo, the Sith master had not known why Qui-Gon was so important, but now, with the Chosen One among them, the Jedi master's role was all too apparent. As the Jedi Warrior fought to save Qui-Gon's life, the Sith master toiled and plotted to end it.
Obi-Wan spent a cold, restless night alone in his and Qui-Gon's bed. Dreams and misty visions of the future haunted his sleep and although the knight had gone to bed sure of his decision, come morning something had changed and the Shadow arose to sunlight and a new purpose.
"I felt the fluctuations in the Force," Obi-Wan confessed to the full Jedi Council without any preamble. "Twice I have been left without my extra senses."
"Grave this news is."
"Why have you suddenly decided to come to us with this information?" Mundi demanded.
"Dark times lay ahead, we cannot be divided." Obi-Wan bowed his head. "I apologise for my distrust, I allowed the future to taint my present."
"We trust you, Obi-Wan," Mace said, echoing the earlier words of Master Yaddle.
"I know," Obi-Wan said with a faint smile, sending a quick wink to Yaddle.
"Where are you going?" Yaddle asked in response to his playfulness.
"What makes you thing I am leaving?"
"Knight Kenobi!"
Obi-Wan smiled to hear that tone in Mace's voice again. He had missed this, missed this closeness and wondered why he had waited so long before making his confession.
"I'm going after Qui-Gon."
"Is that a good idea?"
"When my head can't decide, perhaps it's better to listen to my heart," Obi-Wan answered. Only Yaddle understood his cryptic words and once again the two Jedi shared a smile. "I am going to be with my bondmate, there is no reason why I should not be."
"May the Force be with you, Knight Kenobi."
"And with you, also."
Obi-Wan left the Council chamber and headed straight for the landing platform where his ship sat ready to take him anywhere he desired to go. If he hurried, he could catch up to Qui-Gon and Anakin and meet up with them as they alighted from their transport.
'I'm coming,' the young Jedi whispered along the Soulbond, and although Qui-Gon was too far away to hear his words, the master felt Obi-Wan's intent and sent his own wave of love back to Obi-Wan. The bondmates had been given five years, no more time would be allowed them to adjust, but Obi-Wan was confident they could work through it as they went. They had been the best Jedi pairing when he had been an apprentice and Obi-Wan could see no reason why their pairing would not be just as successful the second time around. Doubts and dangers lingered in the Shadow's mind, but the inner part of the man, the part of him that was bondmate to Qui-Gon Jinn, knew that their love at least would survive the gathering Dark.
Obi-Wan Kenobi left Coruscant and went to be with his bondmate.
Epilogue – Shadows of Attack and Revenge
Anakin Skywalker sat quietly on the floor of his darkened cabin. He was very still, or at least he was trying to be. It took all his concentration to just stop from fidgeting as much as usual. He simply did not or could not understand it; no matter how hard he tried, he just could not meditate as his master had instructed.
"Maybe that is the problem," Qui-Gon had said when he had asked his master why he failed at what the apprentice considered the easiest of tasks and skills the Jedi used. "You're trying too hard."
Anakin had gone away and tried again, but he did not understand how he could try without trying too hard. As he sat pondering Qui-Gon's words, so another's words also came to him.
"There is no try,' he remembered Master Yoda telling him, but to the young boy this made even less sense than Qui-Gon's advice. So, he continued to sit in the dark aboard a ship headed towards a planet in dire need of the Jedi's aid. Anakin was excited, although he knew he should not be, but finally, a real mission. He had had dreams of being a Jedi, of walking into danger, into war zones and becoming a hero to desperate people. At last, it seemed that the life of a Jedi, what he imagined it to be, was becoming reality. It was this excitement as much as anything that prevented him from reaching a meditative state at that moment, but it did not explain his failure to meditate every time beforehand.
Anakin was so distracted by his excitement that at first he did not feel the change within the Force; the disturbance went unnoticed until it seemed to reach out and touch him. Anakin paused in mid-thought, his mind finally silent, his body utterly still as he listened and waited. Within himself, the Chosen One felt it again, a disturbance so deep within the Force that only the most powerful of Force users could have sensed it and even then only if they had been looking for it. Anakin did not know what it was, but he reached out to touch it nonetheless. It danced before him, tantalisingly close and beautiful in its mystery.
Hours later Anakin opened his eyes. He was surprised at how much time had passed. Finally, he realised, he had reached a meditative trance and it had been the presence within the Force that had led him down within himself into it. He closed his eyes again, briefly, making sure he could still sense whatever it was that lurked. He could, faintly, so subtle and deeply buried he doubted anyone else could find it. The feeling made him feel special and powerful. He had found a path into meditation and it was with a focus no one else could have.
Anakin was not the only one trying to meditate. In a ship, in pursuit of the master-apprentice team, was another Jedi. Obi-Wan sat in the cockpit of the fighter, bitterly regretting that he had been unable to obtain a larger ship. The journey would not be a long one, but Obi-Wan would have appreciated the space to meditate properly in and maybe perform some open handed forms to calm his overactive mind, because despite his resolve, the young knight's thoughts were still in disarray.
Troubles lingered in his mind still, troubles that were not cured by his decision to be with his bondmate come what may. He still worried that he would lose himself in Qui-Gon's powerful personality; that he would gradually slide away until all that was left was the great Jedi master, Qui-Gon Jinn.
But this was not his only concern, nor in truth his greatest. The distrust that lay between himself and the Council disturbed him deeply. Both sides had tried to bridge the seemingly ever-growing gap, but still he felt isolated from them, more so than when he had been alone in the Darkness. And he knew this feeling would only grow with time, not diminish.
The Chosen One, Anakin, weighed heavily on his mind also. The boy was in danger, constantly so, as he was a tantalising target for the Sith lord who remained free. A dark and desperate future lay before them all and Obi-Wan knew that he must protect the Chosen One in order to protect them all. His worry for Anakin only increased when he thought on the fluctuations within the Force and his abrupt loss of senses. Protecting Anakin and preventing the Sith from reaching his goal would be nigh on impossible without the Jedi's advantage of the Force Warrior.
On reflection it seemed that his troubles had magnified with his return, the only hurdle he felt had been conquered were his feelings of being torn in two, or having to chose between love and duty; he had chosen and in doing so realised there had really been no choice at all.
Obi-Wan tried to quieten all his worries in the cramped cockpit, trying to meditate and find at least some semblance of calm. It was while he drifted on the soothing currents of the Force that he felt it, and just as Anakin was fascinated by it, Obi-Wan was horrified. The change was so small, so seemingly insignificant, but so important and so imbued with the Dark that the Shadow could not escape from it.
The Warrior remembered his words to the Council after Naboo, 'A Jedi will fall to his will first.' That time had come, it seemed. Deep within Obi-Wan's mind, hidden from all, even his beloved, Obi-Wan saw and felt the Darkness spread to another. He saw a hooded and clocked figure reach out to a kneeling man.
Obi-Wan strained to see the face of either man, but his vision died and bled away back into the Force.
"If only I'd seen their faces," he told the Force angrily. "Following the right path would be easier."
The Shadow believed this completely, but the young boy in Obi-Wan Kenobi who's only dream had been to become a Jedi knight, who had been raised in the Jedi Temple, shuddered at the thought.
'The right path?' he quietly asked the man he had become, 'If you saw them you'd hunt them and destroy them. Killing is not the way of the Jedi, it is not they way of the Light.'
Obi-Wan did think on the voice's words, but another, stronger part of him spoke up.
'I act for the Jedi,' it said. 'I sacrifice my Light so that they need not. Yes, the right path for me, the path that would prevent my vision from becoming true.'
The boy, which was all that was left of Obi-Wan's old Jedi training, was silenced in the face is such conviction.
"I am Shadow," said Obi-Wan Kenobi, unrepentant for what he did, and what he was willing to do, for those of the Light.
"Count Dooku?" a gravelly voice asked, dark and threatening, charming and commanding.
Dooku looked up into the eyes of his tormenter and said,
"Yes, Master?"
The End.