A Living Work of Art

by Heavysaber



Archive: Yes to M_A, all others just drop me a note

Fandom: Star Wars - The Phantom Menace

Rating: PG, I guess

Spoiler: slightly for TPM

Category: Poem, drama

Feedback: Yes, pretty please

Disclaimer: Not mine, Big George owns everything, I'm just another one of his little lab rats...

Author's Notes: Picture this: You wake up at 3 a.m. after a horrible nightmare. Something about monster, neatly sorted in rows which eat Qui-Gon alive. So go figure... :-)

WARNING: Implied violance, implied slash, this thing is dark!

A Living Work of Art
by Heavysaber

A living work of art
That's what I am
That's what you made out of me, my Master
Deliberately? I don't know
But you did all the same

You told me when to eat
You trained me what to say
You taught me whom to fight
You drilled me how to be polite
You formed my body 
And you sculptured my mind

And I have always been willing to learn,
Haven't I?

I absorbed all the knowledge you gave
Took in all the wisdom you shared
Memorized all advises you offered
You schooled my mind to think like a Jedi
You trained every single muscle in my body

Haven't I always done what you wanted me to?

Oh, certainly, there were times 
You've had your hands full with me, weren't there?

How many hours did I spend meditating?
My knees bleeding from the rough surface you made me kneel on
Because I made "bad choices" as you liked to put it
Because I hadn't tried hard enough

How many times did you let me feel 
The bittersweet kiss of your cane?
Because I disobeyed you
I hated this cane
I loved this cane
Because all was forgiven when it was over
Because you were my anchor in an ocean of pain
Maybe once or twice I disobeyed you intentionally 

I would have killed for you, Master
I would have died for you, Master
If you would have just given me the chance to do so
And now? Now you forced me to live for you

Sometimes I think you did it on purpose
That you had planned it right from the start
Because I wouldn't have gone on without you
You knew this
And now, I have this boy on my hands
A boy I don't even like
But nonetheless I will go on now
I will train the boy
Try to love the boy
For this is what you want me to do
For this is what you made me to do
A part of me wants to hate you for this

I won't disappoint you, my Master
Not after all you've done for me
Not after all you've been for me
I will train the boy
If not for him or for me
Than for you
Because when I think of it
That is what I've always done
Doing it for you, my Master
Before I even knew you

You were my world, Master
You were there when I woke up
You were there when I fell asleep
Even If not physically 
Then always in my mind and in my heart
You were the first one I saw when I came to after an injury
You were the one who held my hand when it would hurt
You were the first one I kissed
You were the first one who made love to me
You were my world
And now the world as I knew it has disappeared with you

The bond we shared was unique
Even light-years away from each other
we were never truly alone
You sent reassurance when I was afraid
You sent calmness when I was nervous
You sent strength when I had none left
Oh, how I will miss all this?

How dare you to die?
How dare you to leave me alone like this?
To betray me like this?
Couldn't you have just waited?
You knew this would happen, didn't you?
It's just another one of your lessons
Like you taught me to swim
Did you really think this boy could replace you?

I'm a living work of art
Your living work of art
And if nothing else
I want to be your masterpiece

Do you know how much I loved you, Master?

 - end -