Summary: Qui-Gon checks out Master Yoda's meditation class.
Obi-Wan walked into the quarters he shared with his master and
stopped. Qui-Gon was sitting in his favorite chair and there
was a small white kitten curled in his lap. The look of utter
contentment on the Jedi master's face made his young apprentice
smile. It was not often he saw his master looking so relaxed.
"Are you going to stand there all day, Padawan?" Qui-Gon asked,
continuing to pet the small purring creature.
"You looked so relaxed, Master," Obi-Wan said sheepishly as he
came to sit on the couch. "I did not want to disturb you."
"I must admit, I have always gotten great enjoyment from cats,"
he smiled.
Things were going well between master and padawan and Qui-Gon
was grateful. All the awkward questions seemed to be behind
them. Thank the Force for that. Qui-Gon was beginning to think
he would never feel at ease around his padawan again.
"So what are your plans for today, Obi-Wan?" the master asked
"I have meditation class with Master Yoda today," the boy said
excitedly. Qui-Gon quirked his eyebrow at the boy's obvious
happiness. Most padawans, as well as quite a few masters, hated
Yoda's classes with a passion.
"Ah," he said after a moment. "This is the class all of your
friends are in, isn't it?"
"Yes, Master," Obi-Wan grinned.
For the life of him, Obi-Wan could not understand why everyone
else seemed to hate Master Yoda's classes. He told them
wonderful stories of when all their own masters used to be
padawans. He sang them songs and even taught them a few, like
the one he taught Bant about the virgins. Somehow, Obi-Wan got
the impression that Master Yoda did not handle his class that
way for everyone.
"Well, you best be off then," Qui-Gon said and smiled again as
the boy bowed quickly and raced from the room.
Something about the boy's enthusiasm troubled him. He could
clearly remember Yoda's classes all throughout his
apprenticeship and beyond. Never did they inspire such glee. In
anyone. Maybe he should pay a little visit to class today and
see just what really went on.
Qui-Gon stood outside the small classroom and listened. He
could hear Yoda's voice as he instructed the apprentices on
relaxation techniques. All of a sudden, Obi-Wan's voice piped
up, interrupting the master. Qui-Gon winced as he thought about
Yoda's stick colliding with his padawan's shin for
interrupting. He was shocked when Yoda actually laughed.
"Master Yoda, please finish the joke you were telling us,"
Obi-Wan pleaded.
The ancient master laughed before nodding his head. The
padawans all quieted down, waiting for the master to speak.
Qui-Gon strained to hear, too. He wanted to know just what king
of joke Yoda could be telling a bunch of 13-year-olds.
"So, last couple come to Council and say sorry they are, but
help themselves they could not. Mate they did," Yoda said
causing the children to giggle.
"So Council replied sorry they are, but to Temple they can no
longer come," he continued. "Then couple say, alright that is.
No longer can we go to market either."
The children burst out laughing along with Master Yoda. Qui-Gon
stood in the hallway, completely dumbstruck. How could he tell
that joke? How could a 700 year old Jedi master tell a dirty
joke to a group of 13 year olds, especially one that contained
his own padawan? Qui-Gon was going to have a very long talk
with his master.
"Now children," Yoda began once they had stopped laughing.
"Share you will ways in which to relax you have discovered."
"My master writes poetry," Bant piped up first. "She claims
it's not very good poetry but writing it helps to relax her."
"Excellent method, that is," Yoda said.
"My master breaks dishes," young Brekka said. "At least when he
needs to relax after a Council meeting, he does."
Yoda laughed, as did the rest of the children. He could well
understand Master Krieg's desire to break something after a
Council meeting.
"My master reads stories that some friends of hers write,"
Tyldak said. "I tried to get her to let me read them, but she
just blushes whenever I ask and says I wouldn't like them."
Yoda nodded sagely at this and made a note to speak to Tyldak's
master.
"And you Obi-Wan?" Yoda asked when no one else spoke up. "How
does Master Qui-Gon relax?"
"Oh, Master says he gets the greatest enjoyment from stroking a
pussy," Obi-Wan replied.
Outside in the hallway, Qui-Gon cringed, his face turning
bright red.
"Did he just say what I think he said?" he heard Mace's voice
ring out from behind him. On the other side of the door, he
could hear his master laugh.
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