Hell to Get Along With

by Nightsister (sop2nd@yahoo.com )

Archive: M/A
Category: AU, Non Q/O (Q/X)
Rating: PG to NC-17
Disclaimer: All recognizable characters are the property of Lucasfilm or Scholastic Paperbacks. The author makes no money from this.
Summary: Xanatos and Qui-Gon make it official.
Feedback: sop2nd@yahoo.com
Warning: none
Notes: Need to make one thing clear: certain scenes were written in the interest of occasional realism, but however far from perfect this Universe is, the horrifying and devastating disease known as AIDS is not a factor here.
Thanks: to the Comtesse, and to Elektra, for the Branding information/inspiration

Two months before Xanatos's Knighthood -

Qui-Gon and Xanatos were lying together in Qui-Gon's bed.

Unfortunately, neither man was naked: Qui-Gon was on his side, his head propped up on his hand, and Xanatos was using him as a pillow as they watched a holodrama together. It was one of Qui-Gon's favorites, a trashy mystery filled with buxom damsels in distress, loyal sidekicks, and the spacer with the heart of gold who stumbles onto a dastardly smuggling operation. There were Hutts, and droids, an evil prince, and following a huge spacefight and the deaths of the prince and the Hutts, everyone lived happily ever after. Even the droids.

None of it made any sense to Xanatos. "If the planet had called the Jedi in, everything could have been peacefully taken care of in a day or two," he complained.

Qui-Gon sighed and rolled his eyes -- this was an oft-repeated argument. "There are no Jedi in this universe. And where would the fun be if we took care of everything?" he asked. Xanatos was so serious sometimes, no sense of imagination or fantasy... well, not entirely true, he recalled guiltily, remembering some pretty erotic fantasies detailed in his padrin's journal...

He continued to lie on his bed, enjoying the feel of the other man's head on his stomach, until Xanatos turned over to face him. "Qui-Gon?"

"Hmm?"

"Can I ask you something?"

"You just did," Qui-Gon replied smugly. "You- oof!"

Xanatos had raised his head, and had forcefully slammed it back down onto his padrin's stomach. "I'm serious."

"All right, all right. What is it?"

"Will we be bonded mates?"

Qui-Gon sat up, prodding Xanatos to do the same. "Would you like to be?"

Xanatos sat facing him, legs crossed. "Will you answer my question, but not with another question?"

Qui-Gon laughed, embarrassed. "I will ask you to be my bonded mate, yes." He gave what he hoped was an understanding smile. "But you don't have to accept, there's no pressure. I understand that you're young, and you'll be away on missions, and you might even want-"

Xanatos abruptly leaned forward, cutting off his padrin's words with a kiss. Without easing up, he uncrossed his legs and pushed Qui-Gon slowly onto his back, settling over him like a warm, soft, living blanket. Only when the older man was completely prone did Xanatos break off the contact.

"I accept," he said slowly, staring into his lover's eyes.

Qui-Gon frowned. "But?"

Xanatos moved away and scratched his ear. "Will you accept a proposal from me, as well?"

Qui-Gon struggled to sit up again. "What is it?" he asked suspiciously.

The other man shrugged. "It's not any big deal- "

"What?"

Xanatos gave a shy grin. "I would like for us to be Branded."

Qui-Gon felt the chill run down his spine. Branding was an ancient Jedi custom, supposedly marking the two halves of one soul. Brands were obviously for life, and excruciatingly painful, besides.

"Why a brand?" he asked, trying to keep his tone light, so as to mask the surprising hurt the younger man's words caused. "Isn't my public declaration of commitment good enough for you?"

"Oh, it's not that," Xanatos said quickly. He merely shrugged, but Qui-Gon could tell his padrin was disturbed by the apparent reluctance. "Not too many people have it done. A pairbonding ceremony is public, true, but a Branding is forever. Every time you see me, you'll know that I carry our mark. And I'll know the same of you."

Qui-Gon tugged at his beard thoughtfully, trying to remember anyone who'd had it done. He couldn't think of one person -- no wait, that wasn't true. Master Illira, the head of the padawan daycare center, and her mate had been branded, but Master Rrroko had returned to the Force over twenty years ago. She had subsequently allowed the hair to grow back completely over her brand.

She had said once that the Ceremony had been surprisingly painfree. Then again, the threshold of pain for Wookiees was probably much higher than that of humans. He gazed down at his anxiously waiting mate.

"You're sure you want this? I mean really, really want this?"

"Oh, yes. I already spoke to Mace Windu about it, and he introduced me to the Branding Master, Master D'Mer."

"I see. Mace did this for you, did he?" Qui-Gon was going to have a little chat with the man.

Xanatos slapped his padrin lightly on the thigh. "He is in charge of Rites and Ceremonies," he reminded him. "And besides, he and Councilor Billaba were considering a brand once. He said they even had some preliminary tests done, but found out they couldn't do it. Something about skin sensitivity."

The other man rolled his eyes. "Sensitivity. I bet."

"So would you do it?"

Qui-Gon stared at his lover, his future mate. Was this something he was willing to do -- to put himself through terrible pain, to mark his body permanently, for this exasperating, irresistible man he loved more than life?

"It's not something I'd like to rush into, Xan." Qui-Gon chose his words carefully. "I'd need to think about it."

Xanatos frowned, but nodded understandingly. "Take all the time you need." He grinned. "You have two months."

One month before Knighthood -

Xanatos hurried to the High Council Chamber, taking deep breaths to clamp down his growing feeling of nausea. He was receiving the details of his Final Padawan Mission today, the one he would take with his master before the start of his Knighthood Trial.

The Outsider Guard ushered him in as soon as he arrived, and Xanatos mumbled his thanks. As the door clanged shut behind him, he was startled to see he wasn't alone with the High Council. Qui-Gon was standing in the middle of the room, looking at him expectantly.

"Ah, Padawan Kenobi. Just in time," Mace Windu said. He gestured him to come closer.

Xanatos stepped to the middle of the room and reached up to pull down his cowl- to find it already down. To his horror, he realized that he had left it down as he rushed to the Chamber, and in his preoccupied haste, forgot to raise it before walking in. ~Where's your calm?!~ He automatically reached up to play with his braid, a mechanism to combat nervousness, and had to forcefully bring his hand down. He mentally kicked himself. ~Stupid, stupid, stupid!~

Mace took pity on the poor boy. "Relax, padawan," he said, not unkindly. "We're not here to judge you on your appearance." He became sterner as he added, "Although we can argue that a Knight in the field must strive to act and look in a manner befitting the Order, despite outside distractions."

"The more nervous you are, the more nervous you must not look," intoned Oppo Rancisis.

"Yes, Masters," Xanatos answered, bowing respectfully, hoping his face wasn't as red as he felt. He was mortified his padrin had been a witness to the offense with the cowl, although Qui-Gon hadn't said a word the entire time. Xanatos was dying to find out what in Arca's name he was doing there.

His master broke into his thoughts with a smile. "Ready, are you, to receive your mission assignment?" Yoda asked.

Xanatos gave another small bow. "I am ready, my master."

Mace actually gave him a small, apologetic smile of his own. "We've had to make an exception on your part, Padawan Kenobi," he said. "Normally a padawan is accompanied by his or her master on the Final Mission, but the situation in Sluis Van has intensified. The system governor has specifically requested both Masters Yoda and Yaddle, and they are obligated to go. "He grimaced a bit, then continued. "Your padrin has agreed to go with you in their place."

Xanatos gulped and gave Qui-Gon a sideways glance. The other man smiled reassuringly, but otherwise remained silent.

"Do you accept Master Jinn as your master in this Final Mission?" Mace asked.

What could Xanatos do? The Council knew that they were intended bondmates. If they thought nothing could go wrong...

"I accept," he said quickly.

"Excellent," Mace said solemnly, nodding. Then he got down to business. "Doruuma has finally established a democratic, three party government after decades of civil unrest. The despotic autocracy has been driven out, and the new leadership has requested the presence of Jedi to ensure a smooth transition to the new administration. Your mission is twofold: They need a seasoned negotiator/arbitrator to help draft their constitution, and they also need a complete assessment of their treasury." Mace smiled, looking around at his fellow councilors. "This particular team is actually the best choice to send to Doruuma. The Force is with us."

Xanatos relaxed, and bowed. "Thank you, masters." He agreed with Councilor Windu's opinion. Treasury assessments he could do, and his padrin was more than capable of dealing with the difficult task of uniting the three parties.

He and Qui-Gon left the Chamber together, after a few more remarks about the serious nature of their task. "My Final Mission sounds too good to be true," the young padawan said, grinning up at the other man. They were almost at the elevators now, and they stopped to wait for a car.

"Do not underestimate the difficulty of your task," Qui-Gon replied, already slipping into 'Jedi Master' mode.

"Yes, you're right. I'm sorry," Xanatos said, suddenly chagrined.

His padrin smiled. "I look forward to working with you," he said. He bent down to capture his future mate's lips. "And Happy Birthday, Xani."

"It's not fair," Ghani Shri'ket said, idly picking up a long, thin, blue vegetable and sniffing it delicately. "Why do you get to go on your Final Mission with Qui-Gon?" He chomped off the leafy top and grimaced. "Ugh, I knew it. Chale."

"I could've told you it was chale," Xanatos remarked, smiling. "Give it to me." He reached for the partially eaten vegetable and put it on his own plate. "Master Yoda got called away on an emergency mission and there wasn't anything I could do to help him." He filled the rest of his plate and took a glass of chav from the rotating tray, stepping away from the crowded line of fellow Jedi. "And it's not as if Qui-Gon and I would do anything -- the mission comes first."

Walking away from the service station, the two young men went into the lively main dining hall. As it was the busiest hour for midmeal, the voices of the various masters, knights, and padawans filled the room with a subdued roar.

Ghani made his way around the noisy tables, smiling and nodding at acquaintances as he looked around for his future mate. He was so preoccupied that his friend's words did not immediately sink in.

But then he abruptly stopped, causing Xanatos to bump into him. "It's not as if you would do anything?" he hissed excitedly, whipping around to confront his friend. "What does that mean?"

~Oh, Sith. Me and my big mouth~ "Huh?" Xanatos frantically tried to think of a way out and came up empty. He sighed and grinned sheepishly. "Qui-Gon and I- that is, we're- "

Ghani let out a whoop, ignoring the amused, and not so amused, glances of the diners nearby. "Yes! We knew it! Xani, we knew you could do it! When? How?"

Xanatos, more than a bit embarrassed by his friend's outburst, quickly started walking away, but Ghani would not be ignored. "Come on, give! What happened?" He smiled and lowered his voice to a dramatic whisper. "And will we be getting an invitation to your Bonding Ceremony soon?"

"No- " Xanatos slowed and turned back to his friend, grinning. "Not just a Bonding Ceremony. We decided to get Branded."

He laughed as Ghani's jaw dropped. "A... Branding Ceremony?" The other man's voice was hushed in awe. "Great Arca, Xan... are you serious?"

"Absolutely. Right after our Knighting, since everyone should still be on planet."

Ghani sighed dreamily. "When you do something, Kenobi, you go all out," he said, smiling. Then he frowned, remembering. "Wait- but then it's really unfair! You get to go on your Final Mission with your future mate!" He huffed and returned to the task of looking for Ketrin Stoa, his own future mate. "He gets to share a bed with his lover," Ghani muttered to himself, "Off on some distant planet, away from the nosy High Council- "

"Share a room," Xanatos interjected. It always made him uncomfortable when anyone criticized Master Yoda and the other High Councilors. For some reason, he took it personally. "We're not sleeping together." He sighed wistfully. "Not until after the Branding, anyway."

"You're probably better off -- you don't even know what you're missing," Ghani pointed out, stopping as he scanned the crowd more closely. "But what about me? Ket and I had been having sex for almost two years, and suddenly we have to stop for a year because one of us is a knight? Isn't that the dumbest rule?"

"But it is the rule," Xanatos said, facing his friend to look over his shoulder. Where were they? "It's there for a reason." He shrugged. "Arca alone knows why."

Ghani stepped in front of the distracted man, forcing Xanatos to look at him squarely in the face. From past experience, he instinctively distrusted the sudden, wicked gleam in those eyes...

"We're both in the same, rotten situation -- padawans with knights as lovers. We're both in the same situation," Ghani stressed. "But padawans can have sex with other padawans. I'm so horny I could explode. Come over tonight, Xani."

"W-what?" Xanatos fought back the initial urge to burst out laughing.

"Do I have to spell it out? S-E-X? Something we're both not getting?"

Xanatos looked shocked. "Sex- with you?" Then he suddenly didn't look quite so shocked. "I don't know- "

"Okay, so I'm not as tall and strong as Qui-Gon." Ghani halted, smiling to himself. "I don't have his big hands, or his long legs, or-"

"Stop," Xanatos pleaded, fearing his knees would give out. "I'm sorry, Ghani. I want Qui-Gon to be my first."

"First?" Ghani stopped his fantasizing to stare at his friend. "You mean you've never-"

"No," Xanatos said, a bit shyly. "You're the only one, and we didn't do very much, remember?"

Ghani gave a small shrug. "That wasn't my fault," he said gently. "You said you weren't ready... " he trailed off, the realization hitting him. "You were ready, just not for me," he said, his charming smile reappearing, like sunlight from behind a cloud. "Did you know even back then?"

Xanatos shook his head. "It was only a dream back then, but I was hoping..."

"Then here's to your dreams coming true, Xan." Ghani leaned forward and gave his friend a light, soft kiss on the lips. Suddenly-

"There they are!"

"There he is!" Ghani exclaimed at the same time.

Both men laughed as they realized that their respective dining partners were across the room, away from each other.

"I'll see you when you get back," Ghani said, with a mischievous wink.

Xanatos smiled and nodded. "May the Force be with you."

Qui-Gon was in a rather heated discussion with Jonas Fel'Kona when Xanatos walked up to the table.

"We can't fight people's wars for them," Qui-Gon said, spearing a piece of chale with his utensil.

Jonas looked unconvinced. "If we don't help them, who will?"

Lanius, Jonas's padawan, piped up. "But isn't it our duty to make sure that people learn how to help themselves?" he asked.

"Whose side are you on?" his master grumbled good-naturedly, as Qui-Gon finally looked up and saw his padrin.

"Xanatos," he said, smiling. He moved to make room as Xanatos slipped in. "I was worried you wouldn't show up."

"I had a hell of a time finding you," Xanatos said smiling, as he nodded a greeting to Master Fel'Kona and his padawan. He leaned across Qui-Gon to give a special greeting to the little girl sitting on the other side.

"Mara, my baby, why are you so quiet?" he asked, tickling her cheek. All this time she had been silent, listening attentively, as she chewed on a large piece of chale.

"They're serving her favorite vegetable today," Qui-Gon answered, looking down fondly at his padawan. "I warned her that she'll turn blue if she eats too much."

Mara frowned and shook her head, swallowing her food. "See my tongue?" she asked, sticking it out.

Xanatos laughed. It was indeed a light shade of blue. He leaned over Qui-Gon again, supporting himself on the other man's thigh, as he made a show of grabbing Mara's tongue.

Qui-Gon tried not to fidget as Xanatos's supporting hand "slipped" and moved up between his legs. As the younger man leaned back, laughing with the rest of the table, Qui-Gon could swear he was actually smirking.

Well, two could play that game. And against a Jedi master, Xanatos didn't stand a chance.

The other padawan at the table, fifteen year-old Lanius Qel-Bertuk, gazed at Xanatos with something close to awe. "Congratulations on getting your Final Mission assignment, Padawan Kenobi," he said bashfully. "When are you leaving?"

"Thank you, Padawan Qel-Bertuk. Qui-Gon and I are leaving tonight," Xanatos replied, smiling. "You're almost ready yourself, right?"

"Three more years," Jonas said proudly.

Lanius frowned thoughtfully. "What I don't understand is, why did you get your assignment so late? Isn't the Knighting Ceremony scheduled to take place next month?"

"Knighting Ceremonies usually take place twice a year- once during the middle of the year, and once at the end," Qui-Gon told the young man, as Xanatos tackled his food. "Final Missions are more difficult because they must be undertaken alone, but on the whole, they can be finished in a few weeks. If Xanatos completes his Final Mission satisfactorily, then he'll be Knighted next month. If not, then he has another 6 months to try again."

"Now, what does 'satisfactorily' mean? Do you have to be satisfied with my... performance?" Xanatos asked the question seemingly innocently, but the slight pause was there. Turning to his padrin/temporary surrogate master with wide, dark blue eyes, Xanatos saw Qui-Gon's hungry look -- similar to the one he had seen earlier in Ghani -- and gave a small, furtive smile.

Let the games begin.

Jonas chimed in, oblivious to Xanatos's and Qui-Gon's subtle flirting. "Yes. Your master, or in this case, your padrin, determines whether your performance is worthy of Knighthood," he said. "If he decides that you've fulfilled your duties, then he writes his report, and you're Knighted."

"Oh, that's fair," Xanatos pouted. "My padrin gets to determine whether my performance is worthy of Knighthood?"

"Would you rather have Master Yoda make that determination?" Lanius asked. Then, "Are you all right, Master Qui-Gon?"

Xanatos and even Mara thumped Qui-Gon on the back as the man covered his laughter with coughs. "I'm fine, thank you," Qui-Gon said, wiping the tears from his eyes.

Xanatos fumed as he reached for one of the ubiquitous pitchers of water placed on every table. It wasn't that funny. "No, I mean it," he said as he handed Qui-Gon the glass of water, trying to get back to the real order of business. "What if you're inexplicably dissatisfied with me?"

"Thank you. I would never, as you put it, be 'inexplicably dissatisfied' with you," Qui-Gon said, taking a sip. The underlying desire was evident to Xanatos's ears, and the young man squashed the urge not to blush. "I would give you a very good reason if your performance was... faulty."

~Hey!~ Xanatos didn't bother to hide his glare as Jonas and his padawan rose from the table.

"Well, we're off to Goroth Prime -- hopefully when we return, we will greet you as Knight Kenobi," Jonas said, smiling.

"Thank you, Master Fel'Kona," Xanatos said, smiling in reply. "Have a good trip, Lanius."

Mara even smiled, giving a shy, "Bye," before she went back to deal with her final stick of chale.

"Force be with you, Jonas, Lanius," Qui-Gon said casually as the two walked away. He turned back to stare at his future mate. "You're worried that I won't be satisfied with your performance? We were talking about your Mission, right?"

Xanatos shrugged elegantly, the palms of his slender hands turned up. "Sure."

Qui-Gon huffed in exasperation and rose, helping Mara with her tray. "I'm going to walk Mara to her writing class," he told the other man. "Do you want to spar with me in an hour? I wanted to get in some practice time before we leave."

"I'd love to," Xanatos said nonchalantly. Qui-Gon would soon realize the error of his invitation.

Qui-Gon stood with his feet shoulder-length apart, his unlit lightsaber at his side. Bowing to his opponent, he activated his weapon and went to his usual side-ready position. He felt hot and sweaty, his hair sticking to the back of his neck, and loved every minute of this particular sparring session.

With an exuberant whoop, Xanatos immediately launched himself at his padrin, his red blade igniting in mid-stride. He swung down and to the right, just as he had been taught, but the taller man employed the sai -- a jump straight up into the air, his legs tucked under him. Xanatos's saber sliced into nothingness.

Qui-Gon used the momentum of his leap to try to kick the smaller Jedi in the back of the head, but Xanatos saw the foot coming and ducked quickly.

"Not standard tama!" the padawan huffed, lunging forward to strike.

"No," Qui-Gon admitted as he landed, grinning through his exertion. "Just came to me... went with the moment." He blocked his padrin's strike and as he shifted to his right, noticed the opening. He spun back to his left and sliced upward, aiming for Xanatos's side. The younger man saw the move, almost too late, and barely escaped as he jumped out of the way. He spun sideways and moved himself out of reach.

Dancing around his opponent, Xanatos looked for an opportunity, any opportunity. "Your powers are weak, old man," he teased, grinning.

Qui-Gon barked out a short laugh. "Taunting won't help you, pup." He spun around again, this time low, at his opponent's knees. Xanatos blocked the strike, but the movement exposed his right flank for a split second. Qui-Gon took that second and kicked the younger man sharply on the right side of his ass, sending him sprawling toward the mat.

Xanatos rolled with the momentum and jumped up to face his opponent. "Try that again," he huffed, glaring as he rubbed the offended muscle.

"Calm yourself, Xani," his padrin instructed. "And take your tunic off if you're too hot. I'll wait."

Xanatos was breathing heavily now, sweat pooling under his arms and down his back. He put his hand out for a minute, quickly shrugged out of his practice tunic, and gracefully threw it aside. "Yes, much better," he declared. He gave a wicked grin and made a beckoning motion with his free hand. "Come on, give it to me."

Force, Xanatos was a mess: hair so carefully braided back had somehow gotten loose and now stuck out in crazy angles, sweat darkened the waistband of leggings hanging on slender hips and glistened off his smooth chest, making the pale pink of his nipples stand out, just begging to be licked...

Qui-Gon felt his heart skip a beat. Taking a deep breath, he faced his padrin and powered down his weapon.

Xanatos, confused, did the same. "Are we done?" he asked.

"I'm sorry- I just remembered- I have to go. I have to get Mara." Without even waiting for Xanatos's return bow, Qui-Gon hastily bent at the waist, picked up his towel, and left. "I'll see you tonight. Love you."

As Xanatos bowed to an empty room, he realized that Mara was still in class, and would be for another two hours. Qui-Gon's manner was very peculiar...

Grinning wickedly, he sauntered out the door.

This was going to be too much fun.

Two weeks later --

Xanatos tried hard not to fidget.

His role on Doruuma had been easier than either men had anticipated -- he thrived on working with numbers and figures, and ran the audit of the treasury as if he had been doing it for years.

Unfortunately, that left him with plenty of downtime, while Qui-Gon had the undeniably harder task of reconciling the three diverse political parties as they struggled with the framing of their constitution. The complex mission of an accurate reserves audit was nothing compared to dealing with the irrationality of human emotion.

This meant that Xanatos often sat in on the framing meetings with his 'Master Qui-Gon,' observing the older knight as he brokered deals and cajoled stubborn senators into entering allowances for peaceful assembly and free speech. And the padawan, who had no desire to learn politics or diplomacy, sat bored out of his mind.

A lonely, horny young man who was also strong in the Force was not a good thing.

He was now in the main room of the capital building, staring longingly at his padrin while the knight mediated a particularly sticky border dispute between formerly warring tribes. Qui-Gon was not a much-sought-after Jedi for nothing, the young man decided. The serene but firm manner in which he handled the hotheaded senators was wondrous to behold. He was also incredibly sexy. Incredibly, breathtakingly, stupendously sexy...

And irritating, all at the same time.

Xanatos stifled a sigh that threatened to turn into a yawn. He had thought it fun at first -- walking around shirtless through the common areas of their transport, stretching (reaching out) to his padrin whenever he could, walking around naked in his berth and not caring when Qui-Gon walked in, or conveniently 'forgetting' to warn the man in advance-

But his padrin's thoughts seemed firmly affixed to their mission. "You're going to succeed the first time, even if it kills me," he had said.

Xanatos had only rolled his eyes. As far as he was concerned, the Final Mission had sounded far easier than previous missions he had been on with Master Yoda.

Qui-Gon spent most of the travel time in the common room, acquainting himself with the names and backgrounds of the main players of Doruuma, or on the comm, talking with Mara. Xanatos also occasionally spoke to the little girl, but felt his mission wasn't something that could be prepared for in advance. He instead spent a lot of his travel time in his room, naked.

Xanatos usually admired Qui-Gon's dedication to his work and to his padawan -- it was sexy -- but he thought it grossly unfair that his future bondmate didn't even seem tempted. Xanatos masturbated in his room every chance he could, fantasizing about their bonding night.

One month seemed so far away...

Suddenly aware of his growing erection, Xanatos looked around the room, embarrassed and certain that everyone could see him. To his relief, he found that half of the senators present were engrossed in the political debate, while the other half looked to be dozing. The man on the dais was droning on about water rights, while Qui-Gon, off to his left on the makeshift stage, was trying hard not to nod off.

Hiding another yawn, Xanatos stretched discreetly. As he slowly worked out the kinks in his neck, he caught sight of one of the senatorial aides giving him a funny look. It took a few minutes for the Jedi to recognize that look for what it was, finally understanding that the young man was staring at him with open interest. The Doruumai weren't aware of Qui-Gon's true relationship to his 'padawan,' and Xanatos suddenly realized that this secret could work to his advantage.

He gave back what he hoped was his most winning smile -- one implying shyness, but still packed with promise.

The break in the talks couldn't come quickly enough. Qui-Gon stood up, wincing as joints cracked, and looked for his padrin. He had seen Xanatos fidgeting earlier and had almost felt sorry for the younger man, but he had to learn that not every mission would be as challenging or as... exciting as some of his previous missions with his master. Yoda always preached that Jedi craved neither excitement nor adventure, but it seemed like all of the ones requiring the head of the High Council were full of exactly that.

Their master had spoiled Xanatos, Qui-Gon had thought to himself; now it was up to him to make sure that his padrin understood the true nature of their duty to the galaxy. Far too accustomed to getting his own way, Xanatos needed to be taken down a few notches, and it would start with the journey to Doruuma.

Almost as soon as they boarded their transport, Qui-Gon had tried to set an example of asceticism, especially chastity. Missions deserved nothing less; even when he and Tahl had gone on missions together, they had refrained from any sort of lovemaking until they had returned home. It had made their homecomings more special, and had accorded their work the proper reverence.

But Xanatos was unable -- or unwilling -- to accept this concept. Qui-Gon had tried to explain his self-imposed rule, but the younger man had just grunted and wandered off.

So Qui-Gon had set the example, studying his mission notes and checking on the backgrounds of all of the people he had anticipated he would meet. Xanatos had a very different sort of mission, and therefore spent most of his time in his room. Qui-Gon was thankful at first for this removal of temptation, until he heard the soft cries and other unmistakable sounds of self-pleasuring. It took all of his willpower not to break down the door and force himself on his younger padrin, the Jedi Code be damned.

Strangely, or perhaps not so strangely, Qui-Gon was able to control himself when on missions with Tahl, but Xanatos seemed to foment all sorts of curious and disturbing emotions in him...

The sudden high laughter sounded familiar and oddly out of place in these serious, almost grim, surroundings. Qui-Gon turned his head, his considerable height affording him some visible space above the shorter Doruumai, and spied Xanatos walking out arm in arm with another young man.

Hours later --

Qui-Gon knew he had once half-jokingly suggested that Xanatos take some time before they bonded in order to become acquainted with other young men, but he hadn't really meant it -- and Xanatos surely would have known that.

Xanatos should have known that. Xanatos knew that.

Didn't he?

By the time Xanatos finally strolled into their shared suite, looking very satisfied with himself, Qui-Gon had almost worn a path on the rug. He'd been fuming and pacing on it for over an hour, waiting for the younger man to return. He'd been able to handle Xanatos's playful-bordering-on-malicious teasing with a dignified patience that would have been the admiration of any Jedi, but his padrin had gone too far this time.

"Where have you been!?" he exploded, without preamble. "The talks were over hours ago! Xanatos, you must keep your focus on the task at hand-"

"Oh please," Xanatos replied indolently, flopping onto the long couch, one long leg draping gracefully over the side. He undid the buckle to his utility belt and carefully placed his lightsaber next to him. Lazily rubbing his stomach he said, "My work here is done -- everything is accounted for, and the treasury is in good shape for the new government-"

"I don't care what you think," Qui-Gon cut in angrily. "I decide when the work is done on this mission, not you."

Xanatos frowned. He had expected some sort of reprimand, even looked forward to some sort of passionate argument -- he'd have never gone off with the aide otherwise -- but this unbridled anger was something else entirely. Perhaps this wasn't the right way to force someone's hand...

"Be reasonable, Qui-Gon," he said, trying to soothe the other man. "Cam and I just went for a walk." He couldn't resist adding, "I thought you wouldn't care."

"And why would you think that?" Qui-Gon said, trying not to shout. "Do you really think it's appropriate to go off with a complete stranger?" He left the rest of the sentence go unsaid, but the implication was clear: Xanatos had not only left the proceedings with another man, but in full view of his intended mate. And now, he was in trouble.

Xanatos fought the urge to gape in astonishment. If he didn't know better, he'd swear that Qui-Gon was... jealous? "I'm sorry," he said quickly, "But I honestly thought you wouldn't mind." He covered his smile with a sigh. "It's just been so boring these past few days. I'm not doing anything except watching you work." He pouted as prettily as he could, his voice consciously taking on a wheedling tone. "We sleep in separate rooms, I never see you. I only wanted to have a little fun. Cam was showing me around the gardens-"

"Cam," Qui-Gon said, through partially gritted teeth. "Is that his name?"

"Yes," Xanatos replied, grinning again. "He's my age, and he's an aide to Senator Chiako. You'd like him, he has a really good head for politics-"

"And what else is he really good at?"

With stunning clarity, Xanatos suddenly realized that Qui-Gon was jealous, and that this was no laughing matter. "N-nothing," he finally stammered, sitting up. "We didn't do anything, I swear, I-"

But Qui-Gon waved him off. "I don't want to hear any of your excuses," he growled, slowly walking toward his padrin. "I've tried to maintain some semblance of order and peace on this mission -- all of the Doruumai deserve 100 percent our concentration and effort, not just one boy."

"Boy?" His pride mortally wounded, Xanatos was angry now; damn Qui-Gon for making him feel guilty merely for wanting some release from the tedium. "I told you he's my age -- actually, he's a bit older than me. Do you think I'm a boy too, Qui-Gon?" He tried to stand, but Qui-Gon had reached the couch and was now looming over him. "Is that why you won't even acknowledge me on this trip?" Xanatos continued bravely, hotly indignant. "Do you plan on simply ignoring me until my Knighting?"

Xanatos made an impulsive jab, wanting Qui-Gon to feel at least some of the same hurt he felt. "Do you think that knighthood will finally make me a man? You didn't think so before. We had some nice times before this trip. I-I thought you loved me."

Qui-Gon visibly flinched, but Xanatos was relentlessly continued. "Will my Knighting finally make you want me? Is that what it takes?" he taunted, blithely ignoring the warning signs on his padrin's face, his body language. "But what if I died on the way home? You'd never know what it feels to have me, to have this." Xanatos ran his hands over his leanly muscled body. "Yes, you'd never have this, and you'd feel sad, wouldn't you? Oh, but wait," he sneered, "You think I'm just a boy. Am I not man enough for you? Or is it that I'm not woman enough?!"

Xanatos was glad he was sitting down as he was starting to shake; he knew he wasn't making sense, but the tension of working so closely with his intended mate and not being able to relieve it had finally taken its toll on him. "I don't know if I even want to be bonded to such a cold, unfeeling, indifferent person," he said, with a slow, dramatic shake of his head. "I thought I understood the part in the Code about there being no passion, but I never thought-"

He never finished his sentence, as Qui-Gon erupted without warning. Grabbing Xanatos by his tunic, he picked him up and slammed him back down against the couch. "You will not make light of the Code," he spat, leaning over the now prone smaller man, just centimeters from his face. "When you're wrong, you insolent little demon, you are so very wrong. You want passion? You want me to want you? To fuck you? Of course you do, you've been begging for it for months. Very well, you'll have it. See how you like it."

Xanatos's head hit the hard edge of the back of couch with a loud crack as Qui-Gon savagely covered his mouth with his own. Still seeing stars, he couldn't even protest as the larger man started ripping away the ties to his tunics. His leggings were next, shoved down past his knees as Qui-Gon again lifted him off the couch, this time holding both arms painfully behind his back.

"Wha-" Xanatos's blood rushed to his head as Qui-Gon hurled him over the back of the couch facedown; he suddenly felt blunt fingers invade the tender cleft of his ass. "Qui-Gon-" he gasped in disbelief, and even with a touch of fear. His padrin would never-

"No. You wanted this." Qui-Gon's breath was hot in his ear. "You've been teasing me this entire mission... before this mission. You can't play with fire and not expect to get burned."

He held the smaller man hard against the couch with one hand as he undid his leggings with the other. "Isn't this what you wanted? Not what I'd hoped our first time to be, I admit, but let it never be said that Xanatos Kenobi didn't get everything he asked for-"

Qui-Gon freed his rock-hard erection from his leggings, by now far beyond caring how much this might hurt his padrin. Force, he had tried so hard, for so long, to keep his intended mate at arm's-length, to prevent either of them from breaking their promise to their master, to wait until all barriers were removed...

No longer...

Xanatos felt the hard, thick fingers painfully probing his tight entrance, and started struggling frantically. "Stop, Qui-Gon, please! Not like this! You're hurting me!" But his desperate cries went unheeded; gasping in fright, he felt something warm and slightly slick trying to forcibly enter him. ~Force help me, no...~

With a mighty effort, he twisted back around to face the other man, desperately heaving him off and down to the ground while calling his weapon to his hand, powering it on in mid-air. He sprang to his feet and shakily assumed a defensive position over his padrin, shock and disbelief marring the delicate features on his face.

"Don't touch me," he hissed, as fear, black and venomous, bubbled up from his bowels. "Or I'll kill you..."

Qui-Gon scrabbled to get away, eyes wide with fright. "Wise Arca," he whispered, stunned. "What have I-"

Without another sound, he lurched to his feet and fled to his bedroom, slamming the door behind him.

Xanatos sat on the floor of his darkened bedroom, leggings still only partially fastened, propped up against the door. He struggled to regain his composure while his heart still pounded madly against his chest and threatened to burst through his ribcage.

Good Arca, what had he done?

The bump on the back of his head hurt from where it had connected with the hard edge of the couch, and he had a cut on his lip. The thought that Qui-Gon, the man he loved above all others, had done this to him made him sick, but the niggling suspicion that he had somehow brought this upon himself made him feel even worse.

He sat leaned up against the door for what seemed like hours, or minutes -- he could no longer tell. He finally heard a door open somewhere in the suite, and it wasn't long until:

"Xan." A quiet voice from the other side of the door, subdued and defeated. "Please, I'm so sorry. We need to talk."

But the idea of facing Qui-Gon, of facing the man he had treated so terribly, made Xanatos shudder. He couldn't do it. Not yet.

"Go away," he whispered, more to himself than to the other man. "I don't want to hurt you again."

As if he'd heard, Qui-Gon walked away. A few seconds later, Xanatos heard the heavy wooden outside doors quietly, sadly, slam shut.

Xanatos was alone.

Qui-Gon walked blindly through the dark corridors of the Main House -- the new and "improved" egalitarian name of the former Royal Palace -- until he came upon the start of the labyrinthine forest garden. Constructed centuries ago, the ancient rows of evergreens had grown until they towered over all who dare to venture down its path. Dense and forbidding, the garden was daunting even in daylight. At night, it seemed all the more sinister.

Taking a deep breath, Qui-Gon entered the garden and started running.

Appropriately enough, tonight the stars and Doruuma's two satellites were obscured by clouds -- Qui-Gon was compelled to use the Force more than once to keep from running into a tree. First, the long entry lane, then winding through the black alleys; he was sure he had even doubled back a few times. Continuing on until he felt he was sufficiently lost in the maze, Qui-Gon finally ran out of steam and simply sank to his knees where he'd stopped, taking in great lungfuls of air.

Audibly gasping for breath, Qui-Gon steadied his nerves and sought the power that had always sustained him in times of turmoil, as he slowly lost himself in the Force...

He thought he had known what he had to do. The High Council had depended on him to be the responsible one, to be the one who wouldn't yield to temptation. Qui-Gon was the Jedi master. Xanatos had depended on him...

Thinking about Xanatos made Qui-Gon's heart clench. The very thought of what could have happened, of what had happened, shamed him to his very core. Once again, he was reminded that he had never experienced that sort of mad rage and jealousy with anyone else-

Jealousy.

Qui-Gon turned that hateful and destructive word over in his mind. Had he been jealous? Of whom? Some stranger? Someone he and Xanatos will probably never see again? Sighing, he realized that as much as he loathed to admit it, he was jealous. That emotion scared and sickened him; he would have to work hard to release it.

As Qui-Gon's breathing slowed further, he felt the soothing flow of the Living Force around him, coming at him through the trees and from the very ground beneath. Everything would work out. He would make it. And after Xanatos's Knighting, they would be together-

Qui-Gon forced himself to consider the very real possibility that Xanatos might now decide to break off their upcoming Bonding Ceremony, and who could blame him if he did? But he refused to dwell on 'what ifs.' Always in motion, the future is, their master often reminded them. He could almost see the little green Jedi sitting solemnly, reproachfully, before him...

Feeling a stronger sense of resolve, he came to a decision. Xanatos's mission was over, and it had been a success: he would become a knight.

And Qui-Gon would face the consequences of his actions afterward. Arca only knew if Xanatos would ever forgive him.

Xanatos awoke to the sounds of birds singing. Vaguely wondering how he'd managed to get into his bed, he turned over with a groan and glanced at the bedside chrono.

Midmorning already?

"Oh, Sith." It was midmorning, which meant that Qui-Gon-

Where was Qui-Gon?

Jumping out of bed, Xanatos realized he still had on his clothes from the night before. He also felt the aches from the night before, aches he shouldn't have-

Aches he deserved, nonetheless.

Ignoring the pain, Xanatos threw open the door to his room, expecting/wanting to see Qui-Gon in the common area where he usually spent his mornings these past few weeks, before he left for the day.

The common area was empty.

His anxiety mounting, Xanatos spied a datapad on the low table next to the couch where-

Shaking off the memories of the night before, he forced himself to sit on the couch and pick up the 'pad.

Xanatos (it read), I cannot express in words my horror at what I did to you last night -- I can only hope you will one day find it in your heart to forgive me. I've already written my report on your accomplishments during your Final Mission, and feel that you are more than ready for Knighthood. The High Council should have received it by now, so you are free to leave Doruuma. There's a transport leaving for Coruscant this afternoon.
This sounds grossly ridiculous after what happened, but know that I love you. I always will. Goodbye.

Xanatos threw the datapad to the floor. "Bastard. He's not getting away with this."

Quickly loosening his leggings and tunics, he pulled fresh clothes from a drawer and put them on. He was still tying on fasteners when he left the suite. He had to catch Qui-Gon and make him listen.

Qui-Gon was politely listening to the tribal representative from the Highland of Doruu when he spied a certain angry young Jedi stalking toward him.

"Please excuse me, Senator." Slipping away from his group, Qui-Gon walked fast to head off his padrin. Hopefully, Xanatos would know not to cause a scene here-

"Xanatos," he said cautiously as the younger man approached. "I take it you read my note?"

To his credit, Xanatos was calm, although Qui-Gon could feel the anger bubbling just underneath the seemingly placid exterior. "I read it," Xanatos replied. "And I want to know just what the hell you think you're doing."

Drawing Qui-Gon away from the others, he herded him toward an open balcony. "Do you think you can just throw me away and be done with it? I'm not even finished with the audit, I-"

Qui-Gon sighed, fighting the urge to take his padrin into his arms. "You gave the Doruumai an excellent foundation to finish the audit by themselves," he said soberly. "The point of your mission was not to do the inventory for them, it was to show them how to do it, and to supervise its creation. That you did, and did well. You need to go so you can make it to your Knighting in time."

"And what about the other part?" Xanatos demanded. "It's very convenient that you think I'm ready to leave now, isn't it? Don't you think we should talk about... what happened?"

"I can apologize for the rest of my life and it still wouldn't suffice," Qui-Gon said quietly. "I'm surprised you're here; I thought you'd never want to see me again."

To Qui-Gon's great shame, Xanatos slowly took both his hands and held them tightly to his chest, over his heart. "But it was my fault," he insisted. "I never should have-"

"No," Qui-Gon said angrily, pulling away from the younger man. "Don't ever say that, don't even think that. Nothing I did last night was because of you. I acted reprehensibly, and I accept all of the blame."

"Oh, that's so like you," Xanatos retorted, his own anger surfacing. "So unwilling to burden me with my fair share of the guilt. Don't you know how incredibly patronizing that is? I led you on, you stupid man, why can't you see that?"

Qui-Gon's eyes narrowed -- Xanatos was very good at pushing his buttons. "I accept responsibility for my own actions," he repeated, crossing his arms imperiously. "You assume that you have some stronger hold over me. You assume too much."

Xanatos blinked once, then again. "I only 'assumed' you loved me. You even said so," he said softly, his voice full of pain.

"I do," Qui-Gon replied wearily, turning away. He realized that they were starting to argue in circles, and he still had a mission to see through to successful completion. He turned back. "We have to talk about this later, I have to go. They need me inside."

~What about me?!~ Xanatos wanted to shout. But he only said, "I understand. Duty comes first. I'll see you on Coruscant."

As he turned to leave, he thought he heard Qui-Gon softly say, "I'll be there for your Knighting, I promise."

Xanatos made no reply, and only went back to his room to pack. He was on the transport headed for home before he realized that Qui-Gon had never once mentioned their Branding.

Some days later --

Mace Windu regarded the young man evenly. "Master Jinn has made his recommendations regarding your application for Knighthood," the Councilor said. "He also referenced in his report some" -- he waved his hand -- "extenuating circumstances... which compelled him to believe that you faced Darkness and fought it successfully."

Mace chose his words cautiously, watching Xanatos's face the entire time. The young man remained impassive, revealing nothing. Admirable, really, in other circumstances, but not here, not now. He continued solemnly. "After careful consideration, the High Council agrees with Master Jinn's assessment of your actions, and we hereby confer upon you the title of Knight of the Jedi Order." Still nothing -- interesting. Was the boy in shock? He glanced to his right and received a tiny answering nod. "Have you anything you wish to add?"

Xanatos took a slow, deep breath. "I don't deserve it."

"What?" Eeth Koth gave him a searching look. "Are you assuming you have the power to dictate to the High Council, Padawan?"

Xanatos grated on that word. "I'm not assuming anything, Masters," he replied coolly. "But it is an empty honor. It is... unacceptable."

Eeth moved to speak again, but the head of the Council cut him off with a look. "Trust my judgment, you do?" Yoda asked sharply.

Xanatos tried not to fidget. "Yes, Master, but-"

Yoda cocked his head. "But nothing. Knight, you are now. Accept it with grace, you will." He thumped his gimer stick firmly on the floor for emphasis, causing Xanatos to flinch slightly. He muttered to himself, "Qui-Gon's influence this is, hmph. Always so obstinate. Always questioning."

Xanatos fell silent, and finally Mace sighed. "It is done, then," he announced, as eleven heads quietly nodded in agreement. "Padawan Kenobi, in four days you will take your place with your agemates and rise to the rank of Knight. You may go." He looked around at his fellow Councilors. "I move we recess at this time, and reconvene in one hour."

"I second the motion," Even Piell called out.

"Any objections?" Yoda asked. "Very well. Motion granted."

Muted voices filled the room as the High Council rose to leave. Xanatos turned, still wanting to argue the decision, when a hand touched his sleeve.

"Padawan?" Ki-Adi-Mundi loomed over him, concern showing on his face. "Will you follow me, please?"

Xanatos followed the Cerean out of the Council Chamber, an inexplicable feeling of dread building with every step.

Ki-Adi-Mundi led the way to a tiny, cramped office adjacent to the larger room. "This way -- make yourself comfortable, if you can." Ki smiled to himself at his little joke and went to his desk. "Please, Xan, sit down."

Xanatos sat down on the edge of the chair, looking simultaneously defiant and utterly miserable, and all the younger for it.

Ki shook his head. "Xanatos, I'm not going to hurt you." He berated himself inwardly as the young man winced. ~Good choice of words, Councilor.~

He tried again. "I called you here because I wanted to get your version of the events on Doruuma."

Xanatos slid deeper into his chair, as if he were trying to put as much distance as possible between himself and the Councilor. But still he remained silent, and Ki finally sighed aloud, exasperated. "For Arca's sake, Xanatos! Qui-Gon may be expelled from the Order because of this! He mentioned some sort of sexual assault -- please, tell me what happened."

That did the trick. Xanatos bolted upright in his seat. "No! He didn't! I asked for it- I led him on, I wanted it, I-"

Ki waved him off. "Your involvement in this incident remains to be seen," he said. "Tell me what happened."

So Xanatos did, every embarrassing, painful moment, starting from before they left to his thoughts on the transport going home. "He hates me now," he ended sadly. "He sent me home as if I meant nothing to him -- like I was some... padawan he could order around."

Ki tried hard not to roll his eyes. Force save him from the unrelenting angst of youth. "You were a padawan he could order around -- Qui-Gon was essentially your master in this mission," he reminded the younger man. "And he did recommend your application for Knighthood, remember? Doesn't that count for anything?"

Xanatos shrugged glumly. "That's different. I completed my mission successfully. He had to recommend me." He paused. "But that doesn't exempt me from taking the general Trials," he continued, doggedly returning to his previous point of contention. "I don't want this to be my Trial. I become a Knight solely because I fought off Qui-Gon? That's ridiculous."

"Xanatos," Ki knew he needed to proceed cautiously here, but there was no way around this. They had to know. "You could have easily called the Darkness to you when you fought Qui-Gon. You could have killed him. But you didn't. You said yourself that you felt fear and anger, yet you kept it in check. You controlled that part of you, and you beat it. That is what the Trials require -- the hardest part, anyway."

He quickly punched up Xanatos's records on his desktop datapad. "You have done well in your formal schooling, and you have high marks in your field work. You still have your final exams in your classes, don't forget; it's not as if we're simply handing you a Knighthood." Turning away from the screen, Ki added quietly, "You've never faced the Dark Side in that manner before, am I correct?

Xanatos shook his head emphatically. "No. Never, I-" He stopped and stared at the Councilor. "I've never faced the Dark Side in that manner..." he repeated slowly, as the realization finally hit him.

Ki had to stop himself from smiling, as the younger man neatly stepped into his trap. "There you have it," he said solemnly, as he leaned back and steepled his fingers. "Learning how to fight the Darkness from a textbook is quite different from applying that knowledge to a real life situation, is it not?"

Xanatos paused thoughtfully, but still looked dubious. "What about Qui-Gon?"

"What about him?"

"Will he be punished?"

Ki smiled thinly. "For what? Are you going to press charges against your padrin?"

"No," Xanatos replied, tight-lipped, his eyes narrowed to slits. "I will not."

The Councilor shrugged. "Xanatos, this is a serious charge against Qui-Gon. His confession may mitigate his sentence somewhat, but if what he said is true-"

"I am responsible," Xanatos insisted, adding, "for whatever he says he did."

Ki sighed audibly and sat back further, careful not to tilt his well-worn chair -- it would not do to fall over in front of a subordinate. "Then there's no reason for further discussion. But tell me," he asked, as Xanatos rose to leave. "Why are you so unwilling to press charges against him?" He paused, then added softly, "You're safe here, Xan -- this will stay between us."

Xanatos was at the door before he finally stopped. "I love him," he said simply, without turning around. He sighed, his shoulders slumping in despair. "I'm hoping we can still work things out. If it's not too late. If he still wants me." He left, quietly shutting the door behind him.

Ki stared at the door for a minute, then when he was sure the younger man had gone, punched in a direct commlink command. A small hologram of Qui-Gon Jinn popped up on the raised comm station platform a few seconds later.

"Jinn here."

"Qui-Gon, it's Ki." He could almost see his friend steadying himself for bad news.

"Well?" Qui-Gon demanded, hands on hips. "When are you expecting Xanatos?"

Ki shook his head. This man was something else. "I told you I would not allow you to listen in on my conversation with Xanatos-" he began.

"Don't give me that," the tiny figure of Qui-Gon snapped. "I told you I wanted to hear Xanatos's side of the story. He denied my version of what happened, didn't he?"

"He said he takes full responsibility for whatever you said you did." Ki paused strategically, then sank in the knife. "He also thinks you hate him, and seriously doubts your desire to be with him anymore. He seems quite troubled-"

"What?!" Qui-Gon thundered. "Why in Arca's name would Xan think I didn't still love him? Force, Ki, why does he think I sent him home without me? I had to get home where he'd be safe. Not love him..." The Jedi master shook his head in utter amazement at his padrin's apparent total lack of anything remotely resembling intelligence.

Ki shrugged, unfazed by the outburst. "You tell me." He sighed dramatically. "Honestly, Qui-Gon, this is a complete waste of my time. It's obvious he still loves you, and he'll defend you to the death, if necessary. You need to stop playing these games-"

"This is no game," Qui-Gon replied testily. "The fault is entirely mine. There's no reason he should- "

"But there is a reason," Ki cut in. "I told you, you gundark. He loves you." He made a show of examining the datacards on his desk. "It's neither my place nor my job to arbitrate this little lovers' quarrel," he added, the authoritative mask of Councilorship slipping over his face. "But I don't think I have to remind you that the longer you stay away, the more you're reinforcing Xanatos's feeling that, in fact, you don't return his love for you."

"You son of a Sith," Qui-Gon glared. "I want you to comm Xanatos right now and-"

"I think our transmission is breaking up," Ki said, as he fiddled with his comm controls. "Just come home and tell him yourself."

The staticky image of Qui-Gon Jinn started waving his arms. "Don't you dare-"

"I'm sorry, Qui-Gon. I can't hear you. Mundi out."

Four days went by quickly, and Xanatos smoothly moved through his final, formal exams. He even went so far as to obtain his cargo transport pilot's license a year ahead of schedule, although the usual high of achievement felt strangely flat.

The morning of a momentous event should have been celebratory, and for most of the people in the room -- Mara chattering cheerfully with Yaddle, and Yoda going over the notes of his congratulatory speech, mumbling to himself and occasionally changing a word or two -- the excitement was palpable. At the heart of this bustling padras, however, Xanatos sat in his customary place at the dining table, glumly staring at a bowl of steamed grains topped with blicci compote, his favorite fruit.

"-Xani!"

Xanatos looked up, startled. "Hmm?"

"I said, could you please pass the zurber juice?" Mara stared at him curiously. "Is something wrong?" She turned to Yaddle. "There's something wrong with Master Xani."

"Many things on his mind, dear one," Yaddle said gently, glancing over at the young man.

"It's zu-RE-ber juice," Xanatos corrected automatically, making listless circles in his bowl. "Three syllables."

Mara made a face. "Whatever."

"Yeah. Whatever." Xanatos suddenly stood, taking his bowl with him. "I have to change for the ceremony," he announced to no one in particular. "Excuse me."

Yaddle watched as Xanatos went into the kitchen to clean his bowl, then turned back to her mate, covering his datapad with a clawed hand. "Do something, you must," she said. "Hurting, he is. Help him."

Yoda sighed and put down his pad. "No part of this quarrel, I want," he said firmly. "Solve their problems together, Qui-Gon and Xanatos must. Alone."

"What's wrong with Master Xani and Master Qui-Gon?" Mara asked, suddenly solemn.

"Nothing, little one." Yaddle sighed, slowly easing to her feet. "Take care of it, I will."

"Best if you-" Yoda began, but Yaddle kept walking.

"Work on your speech, you should," she only said.

She found Xanatos in his room, staring at the clothes he would be wearing for the ceremony -- clothes that would mark him as a Knight of the Order, and no longer a mere padawan.

"Color is wrong," she said, qualifying her statement with a tilt of her head. "Suit you, brown does not."

Xanatos turned. "Should I have gotten the darker-" he started to ask, then shook his head with a snort. "Outward appearances aren't things a Jedi should be concerned with -- who cares what I look like?"

"Qui-Gon cares," Yaddle replied gently. "Beautiful in his eyes, you are. Always." She paused, then added softly, "Loves you, he does."

Xanatos looked away, fighting the burning sensation in his chest. After blinking once, then twice, he said, "Then he should be here. He said he would be here today. He said he would be at my Knighting. He- he promised, Master. Even after... " His voice trailed off.

Yaddle felt her heart break as Xanatos looked at her sadly. "He's not here yet," he continued. "If he's not here in the next four hours, he'll miss-"

"Mindful of the moment, you must be," Yaddle chided gently. "Joyous occasion, a Knighting is; a rite of passage. No gloom on Knighting Day."

But Xanatos could not be placated. "What if he-"

Yaddle shushed him with a wave of her hand. "Look in your heart," she said with a smile. "What does it tell you?"

Xanatos stilled for a moment and closed his eyes. When he opened them again, he was smiling. "He'll be here."

As far as Knighting Ceremonies went, this one was neither exceptionally good nor bad, not too large a group of Knight-candidates, nor too small. In short, just like almost every other rank-progression Ceremony in historic memory.

All except for Xanatos, however. He had the unique, if rather dubious, honor of not having his Final Mission master at his side.

A few rare Knight-candidates' masters were missing because they had joined the Force before the Ceremony, but even these padawans still had their Final Mission surrogate masters with them. Xanatos was the only one whose primary master was present, but not the Jedi who had supervised his Final Mission. He knew this because he had surreptitiously checked among his agemates before the start of the Ceremony. He was the only freak.

Again.

So where was Qui-Gon? Xanatos turned the possibilities over in his mind, while his stomach continued to do flip-flops. Qui-Gon had promised to be here -- but Qui-Gon was angry with him. Qui-Gon was his intended bondmate -- but that was a tenuous intention at best. Qui-Gon was duty-bound to be present at his padrin's Knighting, if only to stand with him as a sign that Xanatos had successfully completed his Final Mission -- but something could have happened to him...

With a sinking feeling, Xanatos remembered his stupid words from that awful night: ~But what if I died on the way home? You'd never know what it feels like to have me...~

Shaking his head, Xanatos concentrated on Mace Windu's words, as the Councilor droned on about responsibility and honor. Yoda, who had made his way over to his padawan after his own speech, frowned and glanced over reprovingly.

Returning the glance with a tiny, sheepish grin, Xanatos caught Mace's final words and said them aloud, along with the rest of his agemates:

"... That into whatsoever house I shall enter, it shall be for the good of the people. To the utmost of my powers, I hold myself far aloof from vice, from corruption, and from the Dark. I will lead my life and practice my art in and for the Light, in the names of peace and justice... And now, I will be true to this, my oath. May honor and good repute be ever mine; the opposite, if I prove myself foresworn."

"May the Force be with you," Mace said, smiling.

"What the hell did all that stuff mean anyway?" Ghani complained. "A good reputation isn't something I'm worried about. And I'm not going into other people's houses, I-"

Xanatos stood quietly, sipping yet another tumbler of 200 year-old Corellian Reserve, a celebratory drink designed to get him good and drunk. He was somewhat scandalized by his friend's attitude, but Ghani's master only laughed and gave her padawan -- her former padawan -- a good-natured swat on the hip

"Knight or not, you're not too big that I can't still turn you over my knee," Gillan DeLeot warned with a wag of a finger, while her dark eyes twinkled with amusement. "I thought I trained you to respect tradition. What will Knight Kenobi think of me, that I raised such a brat?"

Xanatos started at Master DeLeot's words. ~Knight Kenobi. And Qui-Gon wasn't here to see it.~ To conceal the continually burning sensation in his chest, he smiled quickly and said, "He's not a brat... much..."

"Careful, Master Gill. Ghani thinks spanking is foreplay, you know." Ketrin Stoa walked up to the little group, a wide grin playing on his handsome face. As usual when at a party, he also had a glass in his hand.

"Agh, Ket -- you tell me things a master should not know about her padawan," Gillan said, fending him off as he advanced toward her.

"What do you think, Ghani? Would Master Gill want to join us one night?" Ketrin winked at Xanatos as he sidled up to the woman and slipped an arm around her. "A woman would be a first for me, but you'll be gentle, won't you?"

"Stop!" she laughed, shoving him away. "You're making my ears bleed! I'm not listening to this. I'll see you later, Padawan." Gillan turned to walk away, but Ketrin was close on her heels, blowing his lover a kiss as he followed her through the crowd. "Master Gill, I'm serious-"

"Get away from me, Ketrin Stoa, or you'll look like the snout of an Issori blowfish. I mean it-"

"Please, Master Gill, I apologize. Here, let me get you a drink-"

"You will not get me drunk! I'm still trying to live down that weekend in Drepplin!"

Ketrin and Gillan were still laughing as they disappeared into the throng of people attending the party. The reception following a Knighting Ceremony was open to the general population, since virtually all of the Jedi on Coruscant knew someone who was being Knighted in any given year. This was also a good time for padras members to get together, reestablish bonds, and catch up on each other's lives.

Xanatos prayed that he wouldn't run into another of Yoda's or Yaddle's former padawans. They all knew about his upcoming bonding, and he loathed the thought of having to explain why it wasn't going to happen.

But first there was Ghani. During the teasing exchange between Ketrin and Gillan, the young man had stood by, watching his lover with an indulgent look on his face. When the other two had gone, he turned to Xanatos, smiling. "Sometimes I wonder if it's such a good idea for them to be friends."

"It's good that they're friends," Xanatos said. "Imagine if your master didn't approve of your relationship-"

"I'm a grown man. I can make my own decisions," Ghani retorted. He sighed, suddenly serious. "I have other things to worry about."

Xanatos paused, surprised at the sudden change in his friend. Ghani never worried about anything. "What's wrong?"

The other man shrugged. "It's nothing," he said dismissively, but after a surreptitious glance around, he leaned in and said softly, "Ket wants me to move in with him, as soon as possible. Like tonight."

"And that's bad?" Xanatos asked. If he only had such problems...

Ghani smiled ruefully. "I just don't want to move from my master's suite immediately into Ket's," he said. "I want to be on my own for a while, like an adult." He stopped, embarrassed. "Not that you're not an adult, you can do anything you want, what's right for me isn't necessarily right for you-"

Xanatos laughed then, but it sounded bitter even to his ears. "Do you see Qui-Gon here? I'm moving into a single suite after tonight, too. Maybe we can share a place."

Ghani stared at his friend, dumbfounded. "What? Xan, what happened? I thought Qui-Gon was detained, that he was finishing his mission. I didn't want to pry-"

"Xani! Here's the golden boy!"

Xanatos groaned silently as three older women came up to the pair. Ghani gave him a small smile in support as one of the women, a Twilek, said, "We're so proud of you, our little padrin! Master Yoda's final padawan, and such a splendid one at that."

"Thank you, Prelora. Hello Rigga, Celas." Xanatos smiled and made the introductions. "Ghani, these are my padrils: Master Prelora D'lhuna, Master Rigga Eng, and Knight Celas Zalter. This is my friend, Ghani Shri'ket."

"Hello, Ghani. I believe congratulations are in order for you as well." Prelora grinned and turned to her padrils. "Remember the last Knighting Ceremony where we all met like this? A certain little boy wouldn't leave his newly Knighted padrin's side for even a second. Now that little boy is a Knight himself, and who would've guessed that Xani and Qui-Gon will bond in a few days-"

Xanatos's eyes clouded over in pain. How was he supposed to explain to the others that the bonding was probably not going to take place? That Qui-Gon was deliberately not even on planet on this, his future bondmate's Knighting Day?

Ghani winced in sympathy, and made a show of looking at his empty glass. "Xan, would you like another drink? I can-"

"Knight Kenobi?"

~What now?!~ All five Jedi turned as a young padawan walked up to the group bearing a small, ornate box.

"Yes, I'm Knight Kenobi." The words sounded false to Xanatos's ears.

"A package just came for you. From Telos."

A largish crowd had gathered around him by this time, including -- oh, no -- Knight Tahl, Qui-Gon's former lover. She had seemingly just wandered over, but Xanatos knew better. Jedi were extraordinarily (and characteristically) adept at looking disinterested when in reality they were observing eagerly, and more than one pair of curious eyes followed him as he took the box. It was made out of real wood, dark and heavy, and was encrusted with precious stones. Xanatos opened the latch with trepidation, dreading what he would find inside.

"What is it?" Ghani asked, impatient. "I- oohh, are those what I think they are?"

The stones on the outside of the box were nothing compared to the treasures inside it. There must have been dozens of crystals -- clear, blue, red, stones of all sizes and colors -- and more than one resonated with the Force. Xanatos was holding a fortune in his hands.

"It's from my... parents," Xanatos said quietly, wishing for a hole that he could fall into. "There's a note." He held up the holocube, not wanting to turn it on with an audience present, but as soon as he held it flat on his palm, the projector started. A tiny image of Crion Kenobi popped up on his hand and began to speak.

"Xanatos, my son, Crown Prince of Telos," he announced loudly, drawing more curious onlookers around the already large group. "It is our wish that you have a percentage of the Royal Treasury on the advent of your majority. It is your heritage, and your responsibility. You will claim the rest of the Crown Jewels upon your arrival. We look forward to embracing you as the heir."

Xanatos gripped the holocube tightly in his hands, as his padrils and Ghani fell into an awkward silence. Somewhere in the middle of the gathered crowd, a man laughed.

"Wow, all of that for you?" Ghani asked, in an attempt to lighten the mood. "You could build your own Temple with those-"

"Let us take this back to Master Yoda's for safekeeping," Celas offered, reaching for the box. What she meant was, "Let me get rid of it; Master Yoda will know what to do," for which Xanatos was entirely grateful. He gave her the box, nodded, and silently turned to walk away. He wanted to be as far from that wretched present as possible.

In his haste, he blindly fumbled his way through the crowd, with Ghani following closely behind. "Hey, Xan, wait-"

Ghani suddenly bumped into his friend; Xanatos had become very still, his face blank with shock.

"Did you see those stones?" Someone was saying with a loud laugh, somewhere to Ghani's left. He craned his head and saw the back Aden Pura's head.

He should've known.

"That stupid poonch'll probably give them back," Aden continued, much to the amusement of the cronies gathered around him.

"But he's Jedi," a woman replied, as she slipped her arm around his waist. "And if he didn't give them back, surely Qui-Gon Jinn would-"

Aden gave another braying laugh. "And that's another weird thing! Imagine raising a child to become your mate? And he chose a boy over Knight Tahl! That's disgusting and downright creepy."

"Well, at least this way Jinn's assured he'd have someone to fuck whenever he wanted," a man's voice piped up. "He probably trained Xani to spread his legs at the first provocation-"

The crowd around Aden joined in the laughter, albeit a bit uneasily, as Xanatos very calmly resumed walking. Feeling as if Knight Pura and his friends had physically punched him in the stomach, he ignored Ghani's outstretched hand and steadily wound his way to the exits.

He needed air. The insults he could take, had taken for years now. But apparently other people thought that there was something abnormal with his relationship with Qui-Gon, or worse, that Qui-Gon was some sort of sexual predator. Why did some people feel the need to twist something so beautiful as his love for his padrin into something sordid and ugly?

And ironically, Xanatos wasn't sure if they even still had a relationship, but he wasn't going to stay and enlighten Aden Pura and his associates...

By the time Ghani had whipped back around to his friend, it was too late. Xanatos was already headed toward the exit doors. "Sith," he muttered. He quickly followed the other man, but was stopped by a very tall and imposing body.

"Knight Shri'ket, leaving so soon?" Ki-Adi-Mundi asked.

Ghani gulped. "Councilor Mundi, I was just- I mean, I was following-"

"Let him go. He'll be all right," Ki said, as he watched Xanatos slip out of the room. Then he straightened and gathered himself to his full height, his imposing face darkening. "But I see that some Jedi need a refresher on diplomacy and tolerance. Did you see which way Knight Pura went?"

Ghani smiled. "I think he went this way."

The urge to throw up was strong, but Xanatos kept swallowing air until he finally stumbled into Dhalbreth Square, the little ground level park just outside the Jedi Temple.

He wandered blindly around the park, still feeling the effects of the four-five (six?) drinks he had sucked down at the party, not to mention the clearly deliberately hurtful words of Aden Pura. He stared at the pond, staring at it but not seeing it, half-wishing he could jump into it and drown, then wishing he was a glowfish -- "no worries, just swim and eat all day" -- and eventually made it to the fountain in the middle of the park.

It was an imposing piece of sculpture. Xanatos sat down around the rim of the fountain and looked up. In the glow of the city and the two Coruscanti moons, he could see the young Taung's face, frozen in fear and Atravis marble, as the hawk-bat swooped down for the kill. In that typical sense of strange Coruscanti humor, the water for the fountain poured out of the creature's open beak onto the young man's head.

"I know how you feel," Xanatos said aloud to the unfortunate man in the statue. Now that he was sitting down, he could feel the world spinning around him. "Oh, Sith-"

Leaning over the side, he threw up into the water, and nearly fell in himself. ~Maybe I drank a bit too much.~

Xanatos shakily stood up, completely feeling the effects of the alcohol. Wanting to get back to the Temple, but not wanting to go home and face the disappointment of his masters for his drunkenness, he fretted for a few minutes, unsure of where he could go, when suddenly it hit him.

Qui-Gon's suite. He wasn't home, and wouldn't be for a while. Xanatos could sober up there, and join his masters and the rest of his extended padras in an hour or so.

Xanatos very carefully walked back to an aircar stop, ignoring the scant few who shared the transport with him. At this time of night, one had to be vigilant in a public car. He fought the urge to touch his 'saber, and simply glared at the man nearest him. ~Don't mess with me...~

He made it back to the Temple without incident and reached Qui-Gon's suite without seeing anyone he knew, although he thought he recognized his old Organic Chemistry instructor. She even opened her mouth as if to speak, but then shook her head and kept going.

Miraculously, his handprint still opened Qui-Gon's suite. Awkwardly kicking off his boots, which he threw aside into a corner, Xanatos shrugged out of his brand new robe and threw that on top as well. Xanatos stumbled into Qui-Gon's room, where a faint, unpleasant smell finally assaulted his nose.

~What the- ~ Xanatos entered the 'fresher and turned on the lights. Blinking against the harsh glare, he opened his eyes wide and gasped in dismay.

He had thrown up on himself.

Cursing, Xanatos rushed back to the main room. He had been walking around the Temple like that? Ashamed and apprehensive, he checked his new robe. There were some spots of liquid, but it wasn't too bad.

Why hadn't he realized that his tunics were soiled? He groaned loudly. What an auspicious way to begin his Knighthood. ~The clothes were brand new...~

Well, it couldn't be helped. Xanatos fumbled out of his clothes, rolled everything, including his robe, into a big ball, and made his way back to Qui-Gon's room. In a way, it was a good thing he had come here, instead of back home. Master Yoda would never have let him live this down.

After throwing his clothes down the laundry chute, Xanatos stepped into the shower, tensing as the water, cold from disuse, hit his skin. Great Arca, he wanted to throw up again...

He opened his mouth to rinse it out thoroughly and vigorously scrubbed himself pink, not willing to wait for the water to warm up. Stepping out of the stall, shivering with cold and emotion, Xanatos reached for a towel while looking around for his clothes-

"Sith!" He was drunk. He hadn't brought any clothes here yet. He had wanted to wait until his Knighting before formally moving in.

"Damn it!" To make matters worse, the room wouldn't stop spinning. Damp and chilled to the bone, Xanatos grabbed the first robe he could find, the one hanging invitingly on the peg in the 'fresher. It smelled of Qui-Gon, and Xanatos inhaled deeply, wrapping the comforting material around him.

Speaking of inviting...

Qui-Gon's bed, large to accommodate a large body, sat in the middle of the room, beckoning. Xanatos resisted at first, then realized that 1. he had no clothes, and 2. the room was still spinning. Just a few minutes to pull himself together couldn't hurt.

Cursing at his ridiculous predicament, Xanatos curled up into a ball and closed his eyes.

The hot tears came soon after.

Selin Madakor leaned back in her chair and swiveled around to brave a cheeky grin at her lone passenger. "So, were we fast enough for you, Master Jedi?" she asked.

Qui-Gon gave her a relieved smile in return, despite the worry he felt. She and her crew had gotten him back to Coruscant in record time, the Radiant VII's three sublight engines literally screaming in protest all the way. There were advantages to being a diplomat, especially on a diplomatic vessel...

"Yes, thank you, Captain," Qui-Gon answered sincerely. "You will dock near the Temple?"

"Yes, sir." Selin nodded to her pilot. "Lieutenant Williams, take us in."

"Coruscant Control, this is the CEC Republic Cruiser Radiant VII, requesting permission to land. Do you copy? Over."

After a totally typical (or 'typically perfect,' as Captain Madakor put it) landing, Qui-Gon strode through the darkened docking station, watching the shadowed gates of the Temple loom higher and higher in front of him. As he passed by the brilliantly lit guardhouse, he absently nodded to the Public Security Knight seated comfortably on a high chair, half-reading a newspad, half-watching the foot traffic go by.

"Master Jinn!"

Qui-Gon stopped and turned as the young guard scrambled to her feet. He could almost place her name-

"Knight Rozess," he said finally, after a few seconds. He gave her a pleasant smile. "I haven't seen you in ages. How is your padril?"

"Orora's fine. She had the baby last week," Jude Rozess said, beaming. "We were just talking about you the other day -- she received your Bonding invitation." The young knight paused, frowning. "Um, wait -- wasn't Xanatos's Knighting Ceremony today?"

Qui-Gon sighed and slowly inched away from the PSK. He had to find Xanatos now. "Yes, I went to acquire the- I went to Atrisia, and then my transport malfunctioned," he said, walking backward. "So I'm late, and I really must be going-"

Jude waved him off. "Good luck! If you hurry, the party should still be going on."

Not bothering to stop at his suite first, Qui-Gon instead walked swiftly through the main corridor leading to the large meeting space named after one of the greatest Jedi Knights of antiquity -- Ood Bnar Hall was the traditional reception area for Knighting Ceremony after-parties, and everyone would be there.

He felt like kicking himself with every step. How was he ever going to live this down? He had left the message, so technically he should be off the hook. The fact remained, however -- he had missed his padrin's Knighting Ceremony. The biggest day yet in Xanatos's young life, and Qui-Gon wasn't there to see it.

And after he had specifically promised he'd be there, too.

Thankfully, the party was still going strong when Qui-Gon stepped inside the large double doors. Revelers of all shapes, ages, and sizes were chatting, laughing, or simply enjoying each other's company. This was one of the few times a year where most of the work stopped. It was a time of celebration.

But Xanatos was nowhere to be found, as Qui-Gon quickly discovered. He turned around many a tall dark-haired man, and even came perilously close to kissing Knight Efti, before he realized that his padrin simply was not there.

But where could he have gone? As Qui-Gon began to seriously worry, he bumped into Mace Windu. Even the Councilor had a drink in his hand, and was relaxed and smiling.

"Qui-Gon! When did you get back?" Mace glanced at the travel bag. "You haven't been home yet?"

"I need to find Xanatos," Qui-Gon replied tersely. "Have you seen him? Or my masters?"

"Masters Yoda and Yaddle just left, but Xanatos should still be here," he said., puzzled. "Wait-" he waved to a fellow Councilor who was quickly passing by. "Ki! Have you seen Pad- I mean, Knight Kenobi?"

Ki-Adi-Mundi stopped and walked over, looking suspiciously apprehensive. "I saw him leave a few hours ago," he replied. "Good to see you back on planet, Qui-Gon."

But Qui-Gon was in no mood for small talk. "Where? Which way did he go?" he asked, impatience creeping into his voice.

"I didn't see which direction he went," Ki said, looking into his empty glass. "I think he-"

"I have to go find him," Qui-Gon broke in. "Could you two spread the word that I'm looking for him?"

The Councilor nodded. "Of course. I-"

Qui-Gon had already turned and was walking away. "Thank you," he called out.

Ki-Adi-Mundi turned to his colleague as Qui-Gon left. "I have a feeling this will be a very interesting few days," he said, with a knowing smile.

Mace shook his head. "As long as the High Council isn't involved," he simply said. Sighing, he emptied the last few drops of his Abrax cognac. "Public speaking always makes me thirsty," he complained good-naturedly. "Let's get another drink. Master Eng!" he called out, spying the diminutive woman with her padrils. "Have you seen Knight Kenobi? Master Jinn is looking for him!"

Qui-Gon made his way through the darkened halls, trying to formulate a plan. Where could his padrin be? Where would he go, if he were Xanatos? Sighing, he decided to put his travel pack away first, and headed toward his suite.

He spied the boots in the corner as soon as he palmed open his door, and almost shouted in relief and joy. Xanatos was here. Xanatos was here. Waiting for him. Of course. Why had he worried?

Smiling giddily, Qui-Gon walked down the short hallway to his room, the events of the past few weeks now a distant memory, gratefully forgotten. Xanatos was here, and all would be well. "Xani," he said softly, "I'm home."

As Qui-Gon entered his bedroom, his breath caught in his throat. His apparently exhausted padrin was fast asleep on his, soon to be their, bed. The blinds that usually shrouded the room in darkness had been left open, allowing the cityglow of the restless planet to shine into the space, creating the illusion of a lovely, silver-toned young man. Xanatos, adorably overwrapped in what looked to be Qui-Gon's own worn nightrobe, was curled up on his side, his head pillowed on one arm. The single sheet was pooled by his feet.

Qui-Gon crept in carefully, so as not to disturb his padrin's slumber, then noticed Xanatos's hair. ~The braid's gone,~ he thought with a pang. The padawan was now a vested knight, and Qui-Gon hadn't been there to witness it.

"I'm so sorry," Qui-Gon whispered. Then he remembered. A knight. Xanatos was now a knight. Free to bond.

Free to make love...

Grinning wickedly, Qui-Gon quickly undressed, not caring where his boots or his clothes fell, although he did place his lightsaber reverently in its drawer in the bedside stand, smiling as he noticed Xanatos's weapon already there. He knelt on the bed behind his padrin and carefully pulled the robe up, slowly uncovering the other man's body, starting from the still rather thin legs up toward a pale, compact ass...

Force, Xanatos was beautiful. And now, finally, he was all his.

Qui-Gon moved up the bed, ghosting large hands over the soft, slightly downy skin of his lover's calves and thighs. He tried to remember to breathe as he placed his palms over the younger man's smooth ass, spreading him apart ever so gently. Qui-Gon exhaled quickly as he took in the sight of Xanatos' tight opening. How in Arca's name could he enter that small space? How exactly did men do this together? He'd never been with a man before, and the thought of finally being able to find out just how they would fit together made him weak, his cock twitching in response.

He impulsively stroked Xanatos's opening with a rough, callused thumb, and was rewarded with a muted whimper. The younger man shifted slightly and brought one knee closer to his chest, effectively exposing more of himself to his eager lover.

"Yesss... Qui-Gon, ohh..."

Qui-Gon looked up, surprised. He hadn't thought that his padrin was awake. But upon closer inspection, the unguarded statement and relaxed half-smile indicated that he was, indeed, still asleep. Was Xanatos dreaming about him, then? The very idea made all of Qui-Gon's blood rush to his groin.

"Xani, so beautiful." Qui-Gon quickly spread Xanatos open again, but this time he leaned down and ran his tongue where his thumb had been. He remained absorbed in his pleasurable task until Xanatos whimpered again, more loudly this time, and reflexively rolled over onto his back.

Qui-Gon paused until he was sure Xanatos had settled down, then remained still to simply take in the vision of his dazzling lover. The robe was unfastened and now lay open, casually framing the erection nestled almost proudly between two strong thighs. Tantalizing him, inviting him, daring him to taste.

Qui-Gon surrendered whatever willpower he had left. Tamping down his apprehension, he managed to gently lick the pearl of precum off the tip of his lover's cock. The taste, while vastly different from a woman, was by no means unpleasant. In fact, Qui-Gon thought that he could learn to love it...

Emboldened, he eased Xanatos's legs apart and leaned down to tease the young man's foreskin with his lips, gently pulling at it, nipping and licking his way up and down the slightly curved shaft. Rewarded by a long, drawn-out shudder from the younger man, Qui-Gon finally opened his mouth as far as he could, and tried to take his lover in whole.

~No gag reflex!~ Qui-Gon grinned madly around his lover's cock at the implication, but soon sobered and resumed his fervent attentions. Swirling his tongue lovingly up and around Xanatos' hot shaft, Qui-Gon remembered some of his own pleasure points, and gently fondled the other man's heavy, dark balls.

"Ahh..." Xanatos was thrusting involuntarily now, panting soft cries in time to his movements.

Qui-Gon lifted his head to better watch his lover's reactions; at the same time, Xanatos shook himself awake. His eyes, still dark and heavy with sleep, grew wider as they focused, then locked on the man between his legs.

"... Qui-? Ohhh!" Gasping, Xanatos arched as he came helplessly into his lover's waiting mouth. Yes, semen was something of an acquired taste, but in a few minutes, Qui-Gon had acquired it. He could definitely become addicted to his lover's flavor.

Still licking his lips, Qui-Gon moved up the bed and held a shaking Xanatos, until the young man abruptly pushed him away and sat up. "No," he muttered, rubbing his eyes. "This isn't real. You're dead."

Qui-Gon laughed in spite of himself. "What? No, Xan, I'm not dead. Really." He leaned forward, intending to take his new lover in his arms again. "I'm sorry about not being able to contact you. We lost the life support systems- "

"Where the hell were you?" Xanatos hissed, unexpectedly cross, as he self-consciously pulled the nightrobe around him. "You missed my Knighting! I thought I would never see you again! Tahl was there, people thought you had doubts about me, I already told Ghani that we broke up, my parents sent this horrible box of jewels right to the party and people were laughing, I was so angry I threw up in the fountain after the Ceremony-"

"What?" Qui-Gon was stunned. "Wait, wait- you thought we had broken up?" Frantically trying to suppress a bout of chuckling, since Xanatos wouldn't understand and was obviously not in any kind of joking mood, he reached over and gently caressed his padrin's face, wincing inwardly as the other man visibly flinched. "I'm so sorry about missing your Knighting," he soothed. "My transport's life support systems failed, and we had to make an emergency landing on Ord Radama. It took me half the day to find another transport, and I comm'ed Coruscant Control, but your Ceremony had just finished. Didn't you get my message that I was on my way? I sent it to your suite."

To Qui-Gon's surprise, Xanatos gave a rueful laugh. "I never went home," he said. We went straight from the Ceremony to the party. I- waited for you, then when I couldn't stand it anymore, I left-" He shook his head. "I left the Temple and walked around Dhalbreth Square for a while- looked at the glowfish, and then I came here." He looked away, painfully young in his embarrassment. "That's where I threw up. In the fountain at Dhalbreth Square."

Sighing, he let his shoulders rise and fall. "I'm sorry. I should've known that you would try to contact me. But- no, wait," he added, frowning, as he again scooted away from Qui-Gon's reach. He took a deep breath and continued. "Do you think you can just walk in here and hand me some story about detours, and expect me to welcome you back with open arms?" he asked evenly, an uncharacteristically hard, almost dangerous look in his glittering midnight eyes.

This was definitely not the welcome Qui-Gon had been expecting. "But I was getting-"

Xanatos shook his head hard, then immediately bit the side of his cheek as the room swayed a bit. "No-o. Don't interrupt. We don't go on until we talk about what happened on Doruuma."

Seeing Qui-Gon's face darken in protest, Xanatos held up a hand, noting with some small pleasure that it wasn't shaking. "I know that what happened wasn't my fault, and it still angers me to think how you almost destroyed everything we both worked so hard for-"

Qui-Gon placed his hands flat on the bed and lowered his head. "I can't apologize enough," he said humbly. "It was reprehensible, not to mention extremely embarrassing. I'll make it up to you; please forgive me, I-"

"I'm not asking for reparations!" Xanatos huffed. "And I do forgive you, have forgiven you. Long ago."

"Ki said you blamed yourself," Qui-Gon went on quietly, still speaking into the mattress. "You shouldn't have."

"They could've thrown you out of the Order. I couldn't let that happen," Xanatos said flatly. "Especially not since at least part of it was my fault. Yes," he added, as Qui-Gon quickly sat up, "It was. Not the- not what might have happened, but the time before. I acted like an idiot." He paused, then added quietly, "And I can't fully forgive you until you forgive me."

Xanatos leaned in, his tone and the expression on his face now earnest and clear. "I'm a knight of the Order now, Qui-Gon. Maybe not exactly your equal in the Order's eyes, but more equal than I was before. And I cannot, will not, be with you until you can accept that." He paused, tilting his head, dreading the answer to his next words. "Now... do you forgive me?"

"There's nothing-" Qui-Gon reiterated stubbornly, but stopped when he saw the look of anger -- and disappointment? -- on Xanatos's face. The younger man apparently wasn't going to budge on this point. Qui-Gon surprisingly found himself biting back a smile. When had Xanatos grown such a durasteel spine? Despite all of the hardship and sorrow they'd been through recently, he was growing ever more exceedingly proud of his padrin, his intended bondmate-

And Xanatos would be his, if he played his hand just right.

"I forgive you," he said after a while. "You acted like a child, and I reacted badly to it. I can't believe you would think that I would back out of our Branding, though."

"Well, it wasn't so much me as-" Xanatos stopped. "Did you say Branding?"

~Got you.~ Qui-Gon smiled. "I'll be right back."

Jumping up off the bed and out the door, he soon returned with an object wrapped in nerfhide. He proudly unrolled the hide to reveal two long, thin, black sticks made of metal, both with a delicate loop on one end and a symbol on the other. Giving an almost shy smile, Qui-Gon asked softly, "Will you do me the honor of bonding with me, Knight Kenobi?"

He passed one stick over to a dumbstruck Xanatos, who turned it over in his hand. The symbol, a stylized 'J' and 'K,' was clean and striking in its lines and in its simplicity of design. The two letters were connected, sharing the same line in the middle. The irons were gorgeous, even more beautiful than he had imagined when he had wistfully doodled a rough design en route to Doruuma, hoping that Qui-Gon would come around to his way of thinking in time.

"Yes," Xanatos whispered with a smile, leaning back on his pillow. Suddenly he frowned, remembering something. "You missed my Knighting to get these?"

"Where do you think I was all this time?" Qui-Gon asked, smiling back. "I had to go to Atrisia to purchase them. They're exactly what you designed," he added, pulling out the wrinkled sketch that was rolled in the nerfhide. "Atrisia is where Master D'Mer would have ordered them from, anyway. But I know that's still no excuse-"

Xanatos cut him off with a rough kiss; he was radiant as they came apart. "I love them," he sighed happily. "But the invitations -- the Branding Ceremony-"

"Well, we still have a few friends around, and at least some of our padras are still on planet for your Knighting, surely. And Mara, definitely," Qui-Gon said, smiling in reply. "But as long as we're together, I don't care if no one shows up." Carefully placing the irons back in the case, he deposited them in the bedside drawer next to the lightsabers.

When he turned back around, his padrin was still grinning, but the smile had somehow changed-

"What is it?" he asked warily

"Oh, nothing," Xanatos said calmly, slowly straightening his legs. "But I am a knight now, and I owe you for waking me up."

Qui-Gon grinned back, finally understanding. "You owe me nothing," he said. "That was for waking me up three months ago. However," he added, leaning in, "I still have to give you your Knighting present."

Xanatos's smile faltered slightly. "But you got the irons-"

But Qui-Gon was firm. "Just shut up and lean back," he said. Wise and noble Arca -- he was nearly done in by the depth of love and trust in his padrin's eyes, as the younger man unquestioningly did as directed.

"What are you planning to do?" Xanatos murmured teasingly.

"I plan to make love to you," was the heartfelt answer. "That is... if you want me to."

The grin was positively dazzling. "Oh, I think that would be acceptable," Xanatos said, satisfied, as he scooted lower down the bed and made himself comfortable.

Qui-Gon chuckled softly. "When did you become such a brat?"

Xanatos laughed in delight. "Wait, don't you mean 'insolent little demon'?" The laughter died as Qui-Gon frowned, then started to pull away.

"Xan, I'm sorry about what I said-"

But Xanatos shook his head. "Forget it," he said, pulling his lover back toward him. "Besides, I kind of like it now. 'Little demon,'" he repeated with a lazy smile, letting the phrase roll around on his tongue. "No one's ever called me that before. I think I like the idea of being your personal, private demon. It could be your secret name for me."

Qui-Gon sighed and leaned forward, stretching out alongside the other man. "Believe me, I can think of plenty of names for you," he rumbled, dipping his head to nuzzle the tender spot where Xanatos's neck met his shoulder.

Xanatos meant to come back with a sharp retort, but all coherent thought fled as his padrin leisurely moved down his smooth chest and latched onto a pale pink nipple. He'd never taken a narcotic in his life, but feeling Qui-Gon's soft tongue on his skin and watching the other man's obvious delight as he bent to his task made his head swim. Then Qui-Gon was lying on top of him, giving him more pleasure than he'd ever thought legal-

He sucked in his breath, reflexively digging strong fingers into the mattress, as Qui-Gon moved further down his body. Puffs of hot air hovered over his already heated skin as lips and teeth and tongue traveled across a tight stomach, down to the wiry hairs surrounding his-

"Oh, yesss-"

The sensation of liquid heat surrounding his cock was causing Xanatos's nerve endings to overload, but it was the view that threatened to send him right over the edge. Even in his most vivid wet dreams, he had never dared to visualize Qui-Gon settled between his thighs, cock between smiling lips, fairly humming with pleasure.

If he wasn't extra careful, he could ruin this entire night by coming too quickly. He screwed his eyes tightly shut, concentrating on viewing what his padrin was doing to him as a purely academic exercise, or as if it were happening in front of him to someone else. He also earnestly tried not to cry out too loudly, as it seemed so unsophisticated -- Qui-Gon had had many lovers and surely expected more refined lovemaking, not this crude virgin boy just discovering sex.

But it was so difficult, and it felt so good...

Qui-Gon had been with many women, loved the soft feel of them, the curve of their bodies, but being with Xanatos was marvelous in its very dissimilarity. The boy he had treasured above all others was now the man he loved and desired -- it was incredible to feel that hard, rangy body moving sinuously beneath him, to hear moans emanating deep from within a flat, masculine chest.

Lovemaking was a serious art to him -- every soft whimper and faint twitch of muscle was an indication of what was pleasurable and what wasn't. Xanatos seemed to revel in the joy of being desired: every touch, every kiss, every caress with fingers or tongue brought exclamations of delight from the younger man. Before long he was writhing against the headboard of their bed, face flushed, his breath coming out in shallow gasps, grabbing the sheets as if he would fly off the bed if he didn't hold on tight.

"Ahh... Qui-Gon..."

Qui-Gon paused and looked up, carefully letting Xanatos's cock slip from his mouth, wondering if he had caused his lover pain.

And that's when it really hit him, with stunning clarity. He was with Xanatos. His padrin.

The younger man was beautiful in his honest passion, and for a brief moment Qui-Gon had the admittedly self-satisfied thought that apparently nothing in Xanatos's eighteen years had trained him for this night: no amount of sweaty, clumsy groping with Ghani had prepared him for the joy of being loved (and so expertly) by his padrin.

But who was more overwhelmed? Qui-Gon remained silent, leaning on his elbows, in awe of the man before him. Years ago he had made a personal promise never to compare lovers, but this was so much more than anything he'd ever had with anyone else, even Tahl, his only lover for last three years. Even after prolonged missions, their coming together after a long abstinence had felt nothing like this.

Qui-Gon prided himself on being both considerate and communicative in bed; more than one woman had joked about how much he loved to talk during sex. But now he found himself strangely mute, greedily drinking in subtle changes in Xanatos's breathing -- every half-hitched moan and helpless cry was a gratifying testimony to his sexual prowess.

"...Qui-Gon?"

Xanatos, having slowly come back to reality, realized that something had changed. Opening his lust-darkened blue eyes, he regarded his smiling lover with a puzzled frown.

"What's wrong?" he asked, confused. "Don't stop, Qui-Gon, it feels so good-"

He blushed, embarrassed at his outspokenness, at his demands on his new lover. After so many years of helpless, wretched longing, it was damn near impossible to think he could impose his own directives on his powerful, older, perfect padrin.

But Qui-Gon merely chuckled indulgently. "Do you have any idea how ravishing you are, right now, this very moment?" he asked, as he gently, almost reverently, stroked the smooth skin of one slim hip. "Have you any idea how mad I am for you, like this? How much you make me want to-"

Xanatos looked away, discomfited and confused -- Qui-Gon actually liked it when he acted like a smitten fool? It made him somehow feel... powerful, not naive and stupid as he would have thought. Interesting.

As if reading his young lover's tangled thoughts, Qui-Gon moved up the bed and took Xanatos in his arms. Holding him close, face pressed into the side of the short but silky hair, he inhaled the fragrance of his lover's body, sweet with the scent of sweat and passion.

Xanatos struggled as he leaned back to look into Qui-Gon's eyes, his voice shaky with concern and lingering need. "Tell me what you want -- anything. Please, Qui-Gon." He shyly reached up to touch his lover's bearded jaw, unable to voice what he really wanted say: ~Make me yours.~

But his young, newly sexually awakened body knew what it wanted, and was eager for completion. Hormones raging, he instinctively ground against Qui-Gon's equally naked and aroused body, wordlessly seeking, demanding more, even as he embraced the his padrin and held him tight, mouth held fast against the older man's ear.

Qui-Gon closed his eyes and surrendered to his desire as Xanatos's breath, hot and gasping, betrayed his approaching orgasm. Unerringly reading the signs, he slipped one hand down between them and grasped the younger man's weeping erection, firmly stroking it, deliberately ignoring his own need, wanting to prolong that final release, while granting the unspoken demand in the raw, hungry gaze.

The power he held over his beautiful young knight was mind-boggling. Qui-Gon felt utterly invincible in this sublime moment as Xanatos's ecstatic pants and moans sounded in his ear. Anything, everything, seemed possible, even fighting and defeating the Sith single-handedly without his 'saber or use of the Force-

Suddenly Xanatos cried out, blunt fingernails digging into Qui-Gon's shoulders, convulsing in his lover's arms as his release spilled into and through the other man's fingers. In spite of himself, Qui-Gon followed him quickly, just from the sight and feel of his lover's climax.

Oh noble Arca, it felt so good to finally have this young man in his bed.

Panting heavily and sagging into each other's arms, Qui-Gon slowly brought his semen-covered fingers to his lips, caught and held Xanatos's dazed eyes, and deliberately licked one finger, eyes closing in sensuous delight at the flavor. He felt his lover's odd involuntary shiver and, amused, did it again, trying to provoke a further reaction.

"That's disgusting!" Xanatos exclaimed, as he struggled to sit up against the pillows. "Qui-Gon, stop! that's... eewww. Oh, gross..."

Qui-Gon laughed indulgently. "It's not disgusting at all, Xani," he said. "It's a part of you, a wonderful part. You taste positively delicious. Here, try it." He extended his finger, but Xanatos quickly shook his head, scowling.

"No, thanks. It's... me, for Arca's sake. Yuck." He swiped a finger along a shiny, wet spot on his stomach. "But this is you," he said, placing his finger in his mouth, smiling as he slowly sucked on the digit.

"You don't mind tasting me," Qui-Gon replied, mesmerized by Xanatos's little show. "In fact, you, uh, seem to enjoy it. What's the difference?"

Xanatos pulled the finger out of his mouth with a light pop. "It just is, that's all. This is you. That's... me. Myself. Gross."

Qui-Gon merely grinned, wondering how Xanatos could be so sure just whose fluids were whose, and contemplated his lover's disgruntled features as he placed his fingers in his mouth again. After licking them clean, he reached over and gathered his own release from his lover's stomach.

"Hungry?" Xanatos teased.

Qui-Gon shook his head slowly. "Just getting ready."

"For what?"

"You'll see." Qui-Gon grinned and moved back over the younger man, sitting up and once more positioning himself between Xanatos's legs. Smearing his semen on the head of his rapidly rehardening cock, he took himself in hand and moved gently across his lover's opening, drawing out a feathery gasp.

Xanatos looked up, eyes shining and full of love. "Oh, yes." Smiling, he spread his bent legs and raised them higher toward his chest. "Like this?"

Qui-Gon went weak at the sight of his lover, so trusting and oh so willing, opened up for him. For him. He held out a large, callused finger, which Xanatos eagerly took into his mouth, moistening it with a swirl of his tongue. After several hypnotic minutes, Qui-Gon reluctantly pulled his hand away and reached down to cup the velvety sac as he slowly inserted the wet finger into the younger man's opening.

Sweet Arca, but Xanatos was tight. For one surreal second, Qui-Gon wondered how he was going to fit, but then his young lover arched back with a low mewl and squirmed against his finger, muscles clenching around it, and he was lost.

"Wait." Qui-Gon rose up off the bed feeling a strange sense of loss, and felt along the floor for his travel bag. "Ah-"

Reaching into the bag, he pulled out his prize: a small tube of lubricant, bought during an excursion into the Lower Levels of Coruscant, bought for this one night. Holding it up with a flourish, Qui-Gon was surprised when Xanatos burst out laughing. "What?"

The other man shook his head. "Frixion?" he asked, still chuckling. "Did you by any chance get it at the 'Muzzlian Squills'?"

Qui-Gon frowned slightly. "How did you know?"

"Because I have the same tube in my bag," was Xanatos's reply. He tilted his head, smiling. "I went with Ghani one night to get it. You must have gone in right before me, because the shopkeeper asked me if there was something going on in the Temple she should stock up for." He laughed again. "We puzzled over what she said for an hour, wondering what she meant."

Now it was Qui-Gon's turn to chuckle. "She'll get to know us soon enough, I think." Opening the tube, he squeezed a generous dollop onto his fingers and started to slick himself. Still unsure of how they were going to pull this off, he lightly fingered Xanatos's tight opening, making it as wet as possible.

"Qui-Gon!" Xanatos gasped, his earlier merriment forgotten. He pushed himself closer to the other man. "Do it. Do it now."

But Qui-Gon wouldn't be rushed. Positioning himself carefully in front of his lover, he slowly pressed into Xanatos, elated when he felt the head of his cock break through the ring of muscle.

"Ahh-" Xanatos grimaced, feeling the burn, initially wanting to push the invader out of his body. No matter that he was where he wanted -- needed -- to be, having Qui-Gon inside him hurt.

Qui-Gon stilled at his lover's pained expression as he held onto Xanatos's shins with shaking hands. "Force, Xan, you're so tight..." He tried to move again, inching his way deeper into the younger man's body, but stopped when Xanatos tensed, brows furrowed in pained concentration.

"No, stop. Please," Xanatos panted, hands pushing against Qui-Gon's chest. "Wait. Just give me a minute- ten minutes..."

Qui-Gon waited patiently as Xanatos tried to relax his screaming muscles. Finally-

"Okay, try again. But go slow."

Qui-Gon pressed forward, ever so gently, but the tension and the crease between Xanatos's brows wouldn't go away. Finally, he was ready to give up -- he was doing something wrong, he knew it, and nothing was worth seeing that look on his lover's face. Leaning back, he was dismayed to see that Xanatos's earlier proud erection had completely deflated; he was now quite flaccid. "I'm hurting you," he said soberly. "We can try again later-"

"No!" Xanatos replied, his voice tight. "Keep going. Please." He could endure this, had to endure this. Ghani had said it would hurt at first, although he had never mentioned it would hurt this much. He was determined to keep going -- if they stopped now, Qui-Gon would never want to do this again. All they had to do was take it easy, and move more slowly-

"Don't pull out," Xanatos pleaded again, adding in a small, apologetic voice, "I've just never done this before."

Qui-Gon was momentarily perplexed. "But- Ghani-"

"We never went this far." Xanatos whispered. "I wanted to wait... for you." He turned his head, his pale cheeks pink with embarrassment.

"All right," Qui-Gon soothed, awed and more than a bit surprised at his lover's admission. Xanatos had been a quiet, almost shy, padawan, but he also could have had almost anyone in the Temple had he tried hard enough. That he had saved himself was beyond humbling; Qui-Gon was more determined than ever to ensure that this night exceeded all of his padrin's expectations, especially after what they had gone through to get here. "It'll be all right. We'll wait."

Qui-Gon remained half-buried in his lover for what seemed hours, although it was probably closer to a few minutes. Murmuring words of love and encouragement, he lovingly stroked his padrin's legs, his feet, anywhere he could touch, until he at last felt a bit of Xanatos's tension drain away.

"I love you," he said softly. "I never wanted to hurt you. That you would do this for me is an incredible honor."

Xanatos managed a small smile. "The payoff is supposed to be worth it," he answered, visibly relaxing even more.

But as Qui-Gon pushed deeper into his lover, the distressed look on Xanatos's face returned, although the younger man turned his head to hide his expression.

That was enough. "No, it's too much. I hate this." Qui-Gon swiftly pulled out of Xanatos's body and sat on his haunches, sadly contemplating the other man. "I can't do it."

The stricken look on Xanatos's face spoke volumes. "No- I'm sorry! I promise I'll relax-"

"Xani, stop." Qui-Gon lay next to his lover and wrapped his arms around the smaller man, wishing he could simply wave his hand and Force the pain away. Xanatos struggled in his arms, trying to throw him off, but he remained firm. "Just rest awhile. We can try again in a couple of hours, really."

Qui-Gon had always been a sensual man, and the past few months with his formerly untouchable padrin had been frustratingly long. And now, when they finally had every opportunity, every right, to make love...

He started stroking the jet black hair, loving the softness, feeling the abject misery emanating in waves from his padrin. Jedi were trained almost from infancy to endure suffering, but this bordered on sheer insanity. Even worse, one young man's fragile self-confidence would be shattered this night if they couldn't make it work.

It was a ridiculous situation, but no matter how he felt it hideously unfair, he had to consider Xanatos first.

They lay together quietly, Qui-Gon continuing to lazily stroke one angular, smooth hip as the younger man snuggled disconsolately into his arms. The feel of Xanatos's skin on his own was intensely pleasing and remarkably soporific; he was soon floating on that nebulous plane between slumber and wakefulness, eyelids growing heavier, breathing slower, caresses finally ceasing altogether.

Gradually, however, he felt his body responding to light pressures in his groin, as warm, long fingers, still supple with youth and recent padawanhood, delicately touched him, tentative and almost shy.

"Xan," he murmured in a low, mild voice, "Try to rest -- we have the rest of our lives to make love. Don't worry about it."

Xanatos pulled away and sat up, the cityglow shining through the window intensifying his anxiety, the blatant need on his face. "No. Make love to me now, tonight," he insisted. "If we have the Branding tomorrow, it'll be weeks before we feel up to trying again." He lowered his head and peered at his padrin from behind long, dark lashes. "Please?"

But something in Qui-Gon's face had changed with the word "Branding." Xanatos stared at the other man, finally recognizing what that look meant.

Fear. Qui-Gon was afraid.

"You don't want the Branding," Xanatos said quietly, remaining calm only with some effort. He didn't want to sound accusatory or hurt, no matter how he felt. "You don't want to go through with it."

"No! No," Qui-Gon replied hastily, too hastily, as he rubbed his padrin's thigh. "I do. I did get the irons-"

Xanatos looked at him sideways. "But do you really want this for yourself, or are you doing this just for me?" He tried not to slump as the other man remained silent.

"I would do it if you wanted me to," Qui-Gon finally admitted. "But no, it's not something I would think to do on my own." He paused, searching for just the right words, then decided that the truth was best, after all. "It's a huge step, emotionally and... physically. We'd be deliberately burning ourselves, Xan."

He rubbed his weary eyes -- his idea of their first night together was not progressing the way it should. He did not want this conversation now, but he supposed it couldn't be helped. "And did you know that we'd have to take a concoction that supposedly opens us to the Force?" he asked cryptically, curious for Xanatos's reaction. "That sounds awfully close to death to me."

In that moment, something snapped into place for Xanatos. He was no longer the younger man adoring his older mate -- not in his eyes, anyway. Qui-Gon was actually afraid, and that knowledge was fantastic in itself. And what he was really afraid of, Xanatos wasn't entirely certain. "We don't have to do it, then," he answered, trying to assuage the other man's fears. "I would never want to force you into doing something you didn't want to do."

But oddly, Qui-Gon became stubborn. "No. Now that you said that, I want to do it," he said, much to Xanatos's exasperation. He returned the other man's stare with a level look of his own. "Really. I can take it if you can. I'll even do it alone if I have to."

Xanatos gave an aggravated sigh in spite of himself. Really, Qui-Gon was impossible sometimes. "That's stupid! You can't Brand with yourself!"

Qui-Gon smiled. "Well, if we don't so it, there'd be no real reason we have to make love tonight," he reminded his padrin. "We can wait until tomorrow-"

"No!" Xanatos lowered his head on Qui-Gon's stomach, cradling it in one arm. He gave his best pout as he casually tangled the fingers of his free hand in the dark hairs on his padrin's chest, deliberately avoiding the sensitive nipples. "Please, Qui-Gon," he pleaded. "Please make love to me tonight. We can discuss the Branding later." Then, "You do still want me, don't you?"

Great Force -- even though he knew his padrin was manipulating him, Qui-Gon was done for.

He gave in to his lover's appeals with a sigh; he could never deny Xanatos anything when they were younger, he certainly wasn't going to deny him in this. But he had to lay down some ground rules. He would not hurt him. Not after Doruuma.

"All right. We'll try one more time," he said, shaking his head at the younger man's grinning audacity. "But if it hurts, you have to tell me." An idea struck him. "And it might be easier if you were on top. That way you could-"

But Xanatos had already caught on and was moving to straddle his lover. His comfortable weight was a welcome one as he settled onto Qui-Gon's crotch with a smile and a small sigh. "This feels better already," he said bravely.

Qui-Gon smiled, then gasped as Xanatos wriggled against his cock. "Lubricant-" he managed to grate out. Reaching blindly next to him on the bed, he grabbed the small tube and held it out to the younger man. "Here. Take it."

Xanatos, grinning, squeezed a good amount onto his hand and scooted downward until he was sitting on Qui-Gon's thighs. With nervous hands, he slowly slicked his lover's cock and watched, fascinated, as it became harder and larger. He gulped. He'd seen his padrin naked many times before but had never thought much about it. Even that night long ago, when he had "surprised" Qui-Gon with oral sex, he'd never once considered how much having that hard length inside him would hurt. And boyish games with Ghani had never prepared him for this-

"...Xan?"

"Hmm?"

Qui-Gon was staring at him with an amused but worried look on his face. "I said, now you."

"Huh? Oh." Xanatos looked at his fingers, wet with lubricant. He was supposed to prepare himself? He couldn't stick his own fingers inside his body -- was Qui-Gon kidding?

An odd sense of modesty won out. A bit embarrassed, he gave the tube back to the other man. "Would you do it?"

If Qui-Gon thought the request strange he didn't show it, but only applied lubricant to the two longest fingers of his right hand. "Come here," he said, his voice rumbling in that sexy, special way that always made Xanatos weak. "Sit on my hand."

Qui-Gon bit back a moan. The image of Xanatos kneeling over the two extended fingers, then carefully guiding them to his opening, was almost enough to send him over the edge right then. He hungered for his padrin so badly he could taste it.

"At least we know I can take this much," Xanatos joked, chuckling gamely. Then his lover's fingers were firmly embedded in his body, and those clever digits were moving perfectly, slicking his insides, slowly stretching him, making him beg for more.

"Now," he hissed, throwing his head back. "Nownownow-"

"Careful-" Qui-Gon began, but Xanatos had raised himself off of Qui-Gon's hand and had moved back toward his cock. He gave one last stroke, drawing a shudder from his lover.

With a mutter that sounded suspiciously like, "You can do this," Xanatos slowly reached behind him, took Qui-Gon's cock in hand, and held it still as he slowly sank down, impaling himself on his padrin.

"Ohhh..."

Xanatos felt the electricity pass through his body and shoot out from his arms; visibly shivering, he gulped great amounts of air as he forced himself as far down as he could stand it.

But it wasn't quite far enough.

"Xan," Qui-Gon said, concerned. "Wait-"

"No-ohh." Trembling with effort, Xanatos literally forced himself lower onto Qui-Gon's cock, not wanting to stop until he was fully coupled. To his credit, Qui-Gon merely held on, caressing and fondling anywhere he could lay his hands, murmuring what encouragement he could, even the sight and feel of his lover above him steadily turned him into jelly.

After the first few minutes, Xanatos's muscles apparently became accustomed to his lover's size and the pain gradually receded. A few minutes more and he was able to sit, relaxed, and grin weakly at the older man, who grinned back.

"See? No problem." He gave an experimental wiggle and an even wider smile when Qui-Gon groaned.

"Xan-" With great difficulty he tried to remain still for his lover's sake. But the urge to drive up into that tight warmth was too much-

Xanatos carefully rocked against his padrin, his inexperience tempered by his eagerness and healthy doses of youthful lust and resilience. So this is why Ghani hated his separation from Ket so much, why Qui-Gon remained celibate on missions.

Great Arca, but Qui-Gon was big. And hard.

Just the idea that a part of his padrin was currently buried inside his body made Xanatos groan, the tip of his cock glistening and red. He threw his head back, lips parted, and welcomed the coming orgasm...

The heat and grip around his cock drove Qui-Gon mad. He tried to hold on, to prolong the pleasure, but the need to move, to thrust, overwhelmed him. Holding the younger man's hips he drove upward, into the heat...

Xanatos gasped as his lover grazed that spot, the spot that Ghani had told him all about, the spot that felt so unbearably wonderful-

Xanatos screamed. And came for the third time that night.

Qui-Gon gave a hoarse grunt as Xanatos cried out, the younger man's body clenching around his cock. His plan of a nice, long and relaxed lovemaking was instantly shot to hell -- he came, hard, just as his padrin did.

Silently berating himself for his lack of control, he lay back, panting, as Xanatos collapsed on top of him. Ignoring the sticky mess on his chest and abdomen, he gently put an arm around his lover and found to his amazement that the younger man was shaking. "Xan-"

Listening closer, he was also making odd, whimpering noises...

"Xan?!"

Xanatos rolled off his mate and onto his back, weak with laughter. "Phew! Sorry," he said after a while, rubbing his eyes. He leaned against his mate, and using the other man's chest as a pillow, gave a contented sigh.

"Are you done?" Qui-Gon asked, hiding the hurt in his voice.

"I hope not!" was the enthusiastic answer. "Qui-Gon-- that was wonderful! I mean, Ghani said it would feel good, but not like- I mean, it was- Force!"

Qui-Gon chuckled in relief, finally understanding. "I was almost afraid it wasn't what you were expecting-"

"But it wasn't!" Xanatos rose up on one elbow to gape at his mate. "Even my wildest dreams never came close to this!" Abruptly he turned away. "I know you've been with other people- with women," he said, looking at a spot on his hand. "But I'll be better next time. I'm sorry I came so quickly, I wanted-"

"No, Xan." Qui-Gon gently turned the younger man by the chin to face him. "There's no one else in the galaxy I'd want to be with. You were perfect."

At this, Xanatos grunted and rolled his eyes. "No one is perfect, Qui-Gon." He paused, then added as casually as he could, "So, can we do this every night?"

Beneficent Arca, Qui-Gon's friends had joked that having a much younger lover would be the death of him. He smiled and placed a delicate kiss on a smooth shoulder. "We'll do it whenever we can," he murmured, smiling again as Xanatos shivered. "But right now, I'm exhausted. Maybe in the morning-"

"Or in a few hours," Xanatos answered sleepily, fatigue setting in at last. He curled up against the larger man, but not before a halfhearted, "You're messy. You should get cleaned up."

"Now you're messy," Qui-Gon replied with a low snicker, as he gathered his padrin close. "We can clean up tomorrow. Go to bed."

Xanatos would have protested, had he been awake. Qui-Gon smiled into his young lover's hair. "Love you," he whispered.

The door buzzed insistently in the dark, rousing a somnolent Qui-Gon from perhaps the best sleep he'd had in a long time.

"All right, all right, I'm coming," he muttered, as he attempted to rise off the bed.

But a warm, unfamiliar weight on his chest held him down, and it took a few confused seconds before he realized that Xanatos was sprawled on top of him, long arms and legs flung out in a manner suggesting a deep, sated sleep.

Qui-Gon couldn't help but smile fondly as he tried to move the dead weight of his young lover without waking him. ~Maybe I dreamed it...~ he thought muzzily, as he enjoyed the feel of the warm silky skin against his own.

The buzzer sounded again, strident in the peaceful silence.

"Yes, yes. All right already."

Beside him, Xanatos mumbled sleepily and rolled over to the opposite side of the large bed, burying himself under the covers. Qui-Gon leaned over and kissed him softly on the temple, whispering, "Stay here. I'll be right back."

Fortunately, he found his leggings on the floor with only a minimal amount of blind fumbling, and made it to the door before it could chime again and wake Xanatos.

Throwing on the kitchen light, he palmed the lock and the door slid open with a sibilant hiss-

"Yes?"

A small female human pushed her way inside. "Qui-Gon! Thank Arca you're up!" She barely glanced at her padrin's dazed, sleepy countenance before going on. "Mace Windu told me Xan was missing! We saw him earlier -- I mean, me, Lora, and Las -- but we don't know where he went, and Master Yaddle said you were on planet, but I didn't see you at the party, but Ki-Adi-Mundi said you'd stopped by, and Xan received a box, and-

"Wait, wait -- Rigga, relax," Qui-Gon soothed, shutting the door behind the woman as he sought to process her rapid delivery. He stifled a huge yawn. "Xan's fine. He's here, with me." He frowned. "He received a box? What kind of box?" He had a vague memory of Xan also mentioning something about a box last night...

Rigga suddenly blushed, as she focused on a spot behind Qui-Gon. "Ask him," she said, smiling. Leaning with her head, she added, "Good morning, Xani."

Qui-Gon turned to find his lover standing in the hallway, clearly not awake, eyes barely slitted against the dim light of the kitchen. He had managed to wrap Qui-Gon's nightrobe around his otherwise nude body, but it was inside out and the sash was missing. It was also hanging askew, one side longer than the other. He hadn't even noticed.

"Rigga? Wha-"

"Ah, Rigga, if you'll excuse us, Xan's had a very long day," Qui-Gon said, staring at her with as much silent meaning as possible. "Please let Master Yaddle know he's with me, and he's fine-"

"Fine," Xanatos echoed, a bemused smile on his face. He moved closer to Qui-Gon, prompting the older man to wrap a protective arm around him. He snuggled into the welcome embrace and whispered, with a touch of pride, "We had sex-"

"Xan." Qui-Gon sighed and hugged his lover tight against his chest, hoping Xanatos was too out of it to remember any of this in the morning. "See?" he said, turning to his padril. "Nothing to worry about."

Rigga blinked once, but otherwise gave no sign at what she had heard. "So I assume the Bonding is still on?" she asked, eyes suddenly twinkling.

Qui-Gon nodded as nonchalantly as he could, as Xanatos blinked owlishly in his arms. "Absolutely. I-" His face fell. "But Mace doesn't know -- you said he still thinks I'm looking for Xan-"

"I think I can take care of Mace Windu for you," Rigga replied. "Just make sure you and your new mate are ready tomorrow- I mean today." She yawned and turned to leave. "We'll be coming for you before you know it, so get some rest, you two. Good night."

Xanatos, still practically asleep on his feet, mumbled incoherently as Qui-Gon smiled in relief. No matter how big he had become, nor how accomplished a Jedi, he was still Rigga's baby padrin.

"Good night, and thank you, padril. Come on, Xan, back to bed."

After the woman had gone. Qui-Gon gently steered his barely-awake lover back to the bedroom. Xanatos opened the nightrobe to absently scratch his stomach. "Itches-"

Small bits of dried semen flaked off the younger man's skin, and Qui-Gon was grateful that Rigga had already left. Arca knew they both would never live it down if she had seen the mess.

They crawled back into bed, fully exhausted, although Xanatos was not so tired that he couldn't make the journey across the bed to be spooned against the larger man.

"Love you," the young man whispered, burrowing under the covers.

"Me, too. Are you all right?"

"S'fine. Little sore," Xanatos mumbled, groping for Qui-Gon's hand and bringing it around to his face for a sleepy, rather sloppy kiss.

Qui-Gon gently smoothed the black hair from his lover's eyes and kissed his temple one last time. "I'm sorry you hurt, baby."

Xanatos grunted. "Not a baby," he groused.

Qui-Gon simply smiled and waited until Xanatos fell asleep. Then, putting his thumb to the younger man's lips, he sighed as Xanatos reacted, seemingly automatically, and took the large digit in his mouth.

It worked, just as Qui-Gon had hoped.

He snuggled down deeper into the bed as Xanatos started sucking lightly. It seemed it still comforted them both.

Qui-Gon awoke again several hours later, with his lover still in his arms.

In fact, the young man seemed to be fast asleep, curled up in a tight ball, away from the bright sunlight streaming through the transparisteel window.

"Xan?" he said gently. "Time to wake up. We have a long day ahead of us." When the other man failed to respond, he shook him slightly on the shoulder. "Xan?"

But Xanatos was awake. "Stop -- don't touch me," he complained. "Head hurts." Turning over on his back, he closed his eyes and let out a low moan. "I felt fine last night. You must have done something to me."

To the younger man's annoyance, Qui-Gon chuckled and shook his head. "Or maybe you just drank a bit too much?" he suggested. "You said you threw up in Dhalbreth Square, remember? Just what did you drink last night? And how many did you have?

"Corellian Reserve. Never had a problem with it before," Xanatos grumbled. "Only had a couple-"

"A couple times three, you mean," Qui-Gon said, still smiling. He got out of bed. "Wait here, I'll be right back. You need some liquids. You're dehydrated."

He left the room, not bothering to put on any clothes, as Xanatos turned over again and felt sorry for himself. Of all the days to be sick...

When Qui-Gon got back, he had two glasses in his hand. "Here, drink this first." Sitting on the bed, he waited patiently until Xanatos decided to sit up.

"What is it?" the young man asked suspiciously.

"It's the hair of the rancor that bit you," Qui-Gon said. "Drink up."

Xanatos took the glass with a shaky hand and took a sip. It was a diluted amount of Corellian whisky. "Ugh." He paused, realizing what his lover had just said. "That's a stupid saying," he said, blearily eyeing the other man through eyes that felt full of jagged glass. "Rancors don't have hair."

Qui-Gon grinned. "Yes, they do. You just have to know where to look."

"Oh. OH. Ewww." Xanatos finished the glass in one gulp and gave it back to the other man with a grimace. "It's not helping."

"Give it time," Qui-Gon replied. He handed the other glass to his lover. "This one is water. I'll get you another one if you want it, or I can make you some caf."

Xanatos was starting to feel better, but it was all the more reason to be irritable. "Why are you doing this?" he asked in a huff. "Why are you being so nice to me?"

Qui-Gon gave him a peculiar look. "Because I love you, you idiot," he said, though not unkindly. "You're hurting, and we made love, and we're Bonding today, and-"

"And what about the Branding?" Xanatos cut in, testily. "Are we still on for that?"

Qui-Gon tried not to show his growing impatience. A cranky Xanatos was not what he was expecting this morning, of all mornings. "Yes, I want it," he said, as soothingly as he could. "And I want you, cranky or not."

"Not cranky," Xanatos said. He smiled sheepishly. "Well, maybe a little-"

"That's quite all right," Qui-Gon replied, braving a quick peck on his lover's forehead. "If you feel up to it, why don't you take your shower first?" He gestured to the bed. "I'll start cleaning up."

"You don't want to take one with me?" Xanatos asked, with his best pout. He laughed, ruining his own moment. "Ah, I guess we wouldn't make it out of the suite if we showered together-"

Qui-Gon took his lover's slender hands in his own larger ones. "There are so many things I want to do to you," he said, his voice low and intense. "But we really don't have the time right now-"

Xanatos smiled, suddenly feeling better than he'd felt in a long while. "I can't believe it's finally happening. Pinch me." He yelped as Qui-Gon reached for him. "Don't! I'm not feeling well!"

"Get in the shower-" Qui-Gon jumped off the bed, laughing, and chased the younger man into the 'fresher. "And don't come out until you're clean!"

The sound of running water accompanied Xanatos as he sang an Alderaanian folk song in his typical, slightly off-key, fashion. Qui-Gon bustled around the room in high spirits, checking messages on his comm and straightening up. After making a mental note that members of his padras and Mace Windu were stopping by later, he pulled the comforter off the bed, then reached for the sheets-

Frowning thoughtfully at the rather suggestive stains, Qui-Gon almost missed the other spots, for they were so small. But the dark little stains, more like dots, stood out, even against the other telltale signs of their lovemaking. Frowning, Qui-Gon pulled the sheet off the bed and closer to his eyes.

Blood. The dark red color was unmistakable.

At that moment Xanatos walked out of the 'fresher, still visibly damp, a towel wrapped around his hips. "Chilly in here," he remarked, running his fingers through his short hair. "Can you adjust-" He stopped, noticing his lover's expression. "What's wrong?"

"Xan. Come here." Qui-Gon hid the sheet behind him and pulled the younger man close, turning him around. "Let me see something."

Xanatos gave a tiny gasp as Qui-Gon whipped off his towel. "Do we have time- what are you doing?!"

Qui-Gon had spread Xanatos open and was carefully examining the tender entrance. "You said last night you were sore-"

"What of it?" Xanatos pulled away and turned on his padrin. "I'm still sore. So what?"

"Xani, I'm so sorry." Qui-Gon stood up, holding the stained sheet in front of him, as if in defense.

Xanatos stared at the spots. "Is that- blood?" He looked up at Qui-Gon, amazed. "Where did that come from?" When the other man remained silent, he forced a laugh. "From me?"

"Whose else would it be?" Qui-Gon asked, visibly shaken. He sank back down on the bed. "Xan, I didn't know, I'm so sorry-"

But Xanatos merely frowned and waved the apology away. "I never felt like I was bleeding," he said. "It doesn't hurt that much. I'm only a little sore."

He sat down next to Qui-Gon, making an effort to act casually. He was in a lot more pain than he let on, and not just due to the now passing hangover, but the other man must never know. Gently smoothing his lover's forehead, he added, "I never felt it. Really. As far as I'm concerned, you can't even prove it's mine." He paused, then continued, "It felt good, Qui-Gon. And I'd like to do it again, please -- as often as possible."

Qui-Gon chuckled in spite of his anxiety over hurting his padrin. "Well it's not me," he said, deliberately checking his hands and arms for any inadvertent scratches. "See?" He sighed. "I just hate the idea of you in pain-"

"Well what else would you expect, seeing as how you're hung like a bantha?" Xanatos said, his good humor wearing thin. "It was my first time, and you're huge, and-"

"All right! I get your point!" Qui-Gon looked fondly at the younger man, his dark mood finally lifting. He even acquired a gleam in his eyes when he said, " Really, you know, the more I think about it, it might be a good thing that we have bloodstains. I believe it's Telosian royal custom where the couple presents their sheets as proof of the bride's virginity, and that they'd consummated their union. And since you did deliberately wait until we could be together, well, I just assumed-"

"Cut it out! I don't believe you!" Xanatos exclaimed, gaping at his lover. "Really?" He folded his arms. "Hmph. Virgin bride, my-"

"Really," Qui-Gon nodded in earnest, holding back a smile. "You can go check if you don't believe me."

Xanatos remained unconvinced, but Qui-Gon looked so... sincere. "No. You're lying." When the older man's expression remained unchanged. Xanatos got off the bed. "I'm borrowing some clothes and going back to my suite," he announced. "I'll be back later."

"Wait. Rigga and the others-"

"I have to get my clothes," Xanatos explained, rooting through Qui-Gon's drawers for suitable covering. "We have a long day ahead of us. It should take me about an hour." He gave his lover a quick kiss on the lips and a warning look. "You wouldn't lie to me, would you? About the sheets."

"Oh, no." Qui-Gon tried to look hurt. "I would never-"

Xanatos still looked unconvinced, but let it go for now. "Well, I'll see you later, then."

Qui-Gon could only wait a minute after Xanatos left, before breaking down in laughter.

Qui-Gon had just finished tying his hair back when the doorbell chimed.

"Coming!"

But Mace Windu had already stepped into the suite and was placing his robe on a peg near the door. A good-sized basket, filled with various colored packages, stood at his feet.

"Good morning, Mace," Qui-Gon stared curiously at the basket.

"It's not from me," Mace said, picking it up. "I, ah, found it outside your door."

"Oh? I wonder why Xan didn't bring it inside when he left," Qui-Gon mused. That reminded him. Checking his chrono -- Xanatos had been gone over an hour -- he asked, "Did Master Eng comm you about the Bonding?"

Mace nodded. "Already taken care of," he said. "Although I wish you could've confirmed it a bit earlier-"

"I know, I know, and I'm sorry." Qui-Gon shrugged, contrite. "But these past few months have been hectic-"

"That's an understatement," Mace replied, although he was smiling. "So Bonding today, then Branding tonight." He shook his head. "It's a good thing my schedule is lighter than normal, what with the recent Knighting Ceremony." He pointed a finger at his friend. "But you owe me."

"Absolutely." Qui-Gon checked his chrono again. Where was Xanatos?

"By the way -- you never told me about your mission to Doruuma," Mace reminded the other man. "I mean, the unofficial account."

"What's there to say? The Doruumai were very-" Qui-Gon broke off as Xanatos finally walked into the suite, looking very smug. "Where have you been?"

Xanatos pointedly ignored his intended mate as he greeted the Councilor. "Good morning, Master Windu. Thank you for arranging the invitations for us on such short notice. I was afraid no one would be able to attend."

Mace smiled wryly. "Your padras has been anticipating this event for months, Xanatos," he replied. He glanced up as Qui-Gon crossed his arms.

"Well?" The older man demanded.

Xanatos shrugged. "I went to check on some facts," he said.

"And?"

"Sheets," Xanatos answered cryptically. "Telosians don't have that custom.

To Mace's great confusion, Qui-Gon laughed. "You actually looked it up?"

"I like being thorough. I knew they didn't display- ah, you know, sheets." Xanatos grinned. "I also like being right."

Qui-Gon laughed again. "All the time, I might add." He threw up his hands. "That'll teach me never to try and fool a tenacious researcher."

As Xanatos grinned in reply, Mace cut in, as though embarrassed that he was intruding on an intimate moment. "I missed something, but don't tell me," he said. He took out a small datapad and got down to the business at hand. "It's 1100 hours now. I scheduled the Bonding to take place at 1400 hours. Everyone should be assembled at the Hall of Saleeh a half-hour before, and you two will make your entrance right on the hour. Is that satisfactory?"

Qui-Gon smiled as Xanatos nodded excitedly. The younger man now fully realized what was about to happen. "And the Branding?"

"That will take place around 2200 hours. Master D'Mer needs the time to heat up the fire to the correct temperature." He paused, as Qui-Gon suddenly looked green. "Is that satisfactory?"

But Qui-Gon nodded and looked at his future mate. "That's fine. We'll be there."

The rest of the day leading up to the Bonding ceremony was a dizzying whirlwind of preparation. Rigga and her padrils finally showed up -- "You know how Celas gets- she was late to her own Bonding!" -- and whisked Xanatos away, while another padras member, Master Kai Khan, arrived to help Qui-Gon get ready.

Qui-Gon, already feeling a bit uncomfortable as he hadn't seen Kai in years, grumbled as the Cha'a carefully undressed him and put him into a tub filled with warm water.

"I already showered-"

"Not for physical cleansing, young one," his padrin said gently, snuffling in laughter. "This is ritual."

He bore the bath in good-natured silence. His padrin, being over 100 years old, was still unaccountably smitten with him -- he doted on him, much as Xanatos adored Mara -- and he would begrudge him this one small event. He tried to draw the line, however, when the older man insisted on shaving the fuzzy skin from the small of his back.

"But I don't have hair there-"

Kai snuffled again. "Humans have hair all over. Smell of burning hair is unpleasant."

"What about burning flesh?" Qui-Gon asked petulantly.

His padrin kept snuffling, his merriment evident as he got out a straight razor. "Hold still-"

After being carefully towel-dried from head to toe, Qui-Gon was dressed not in the regular brown and beige Jedi uniform, but in the centuries-old traditional clothing reserved for couples about to undergo a Branding. He stepped into loose, cream-colored drawstring leggings, then raised his arms, allowing his padrin slip the special tunic over his head. The tunic, the same color as the leggings, was slit up the back and tied together in three places, for easier access to the area of skin that would take the Branding later.

"The leggings are too loose for boots," he observed, moving a leg back and forth to show Kai how the material flowed across his foot.

"Boots won't do tonight," Kai replied, eyeing him critically. He reached up to adjust a straying lock of hair. "I brought sandals."

Qui-Gon made a face, unafraid to act like a child in front of his padrin -- the ancient Cha'a liked to indulge him, and he knew it. "But I don't like sandals."

The older man held up the large shoe and swatted him on the behind. "You'll understand later," he said mysteriously.

Qui-Gon put on the sandals without further complaint as his padrin watched with subdued amusement. After his masters, Kai Khan and Oppo Rancisis were the only ones in his extended padras whom he regarded with real reverence -- and mostly because of their age, certainly not because one occupied a High Council seat.

Qui-Gon went into the 'fresher to check himself in the mirror. It wasn't full-length, but he looked good, if he did say so himself. He could ignore the graying hairs for now. He still had it where it counted.

Smiling at his image, he turned to his padrin.

"Shall we go?"

Simultaneously struggling against the alternating feelings of nausea and hysteria, Xanatos paced the corridor outside the Hall of Saleeh, trying hard to fight his growing panic.

"Come on, Kenobi. Get a grip," he muttered in self-disgust, as he walked from one end of the hallway to the other.

He should not be feeling this way today, of all days. This should be the happiest day of his life -- finally with the man he loved, linked together not only in the traditional bonds of commitment but later in the far more significant Jedi custom of Branding. After tonight, he and Qui-Gon would be together always. Forever. The rest of their existence, and possibly beyond, in the Force...

Xanatos swallowed back the sour/bitter bile as it rose to his throat, threatening to choke him.

"I will not throw up- I will not throw up-"

"Xan?" Xanatos jumped as Qui-Gon approached with their padrin, Kai Khan, trailing behind. Qui-Gon wore the same light-colored outfit, which looked wonderful on him. Xanatos was sure he looked like an escapee from the Merisee Medical Facility.

The other man motioned to Kai, who slipped away unobtrusively into the Hall. "Are you all right?"

"Yes, I- no. I feel sick." Xanatos wiped his clammy brow, half-hoping he actually was coming down with something. He couldn't feel his feet, and he started to sway-

"Xan!" Instantly Qui-Gon was at the younger man's side, holding him with large, strong hands, enveloping him in warmth. Xanatos sank into his future mate's arms and let out a small sigh. Qui-Gon was here. He would banish the fear away. He would make everything better.

"I'm fine now, really," Xanatos said, feeling more than a bit foolish. Honestly, he was acting like a newfound padawan, not a newly commissioned knight. "I think I'm still feeling hungover-"

But Qui-Gon saw the clear distress in the other man's eyes. "You don't have to be brave for me, Xan," he said gently. "I'm feeling a bit apprehensive, too." ~Truth be told, I'm absolutely terrified, but I'm not about to tell you that, not now.~

"But we're doing the right thing," Xanatos whispered back, more as reassurance for himself than an actual question. ~Are we? He looks scared to death, even though he's trying so hard not to show it. It's not just me, then...~

"What does the Force tell you?" Qui-Gon asked, staring intently into his padrin's eyes.

Xanatos took a deep breath and, closing his eyes, reached out to the Force. While it wasn't a sentient being, the Jedi and other sensitives regarded the Force as imposing certain destinies. Some Jedi were trained to 'read' patterns in the Living Force, while others were trained to see along a Force-path, and in effect, look into the future. But Xanatos didn't need the Force to tell him what to do. As soon as Qui-Gon was within reach, and especially when they touched, Xanatos knew it was right. The level of intimacy and trust they shared was already deep, almost as deep and as stable as a master/padawan training bond, the strongest bond known to the Order.

And somehow, it had always been this way, despite certain recent events.

Xanatos opened his eyes and found Qui-Gon peering back at him, a small worry line marking his forehead.

"We belong together," he said smiling, as he reached up to smooth away the line from his lover's face. "And I always knew that." He shrugged and buried himself deeper into Qui-Gon arms, tilting his head back to face his padrin squarely. "But change-"

"Is intimidating," Qui-Gon agreed. He continued to stare, the half-smile playing across his handsome features.

"Yes... Why are you looking at me like that?" Xanatos asked softly, amused at the other man's intense, faraway look.

Qui-Gon continued to gaze affectionately at his mate, finally bringing himself out of his thoughts with a small shake of his head. "You had the cutest, roundest little belly when you were a baby," he said suddenly, smiling. "You would come running up to me when I would walk through the door, and I would be so afraid that you would crash into something -- your chubby little legs were so unsteady."

Xanatos couldn't help it -- he barked out a laugh. "Now where did that come from?!"

Qui-Gon laughed with him. "I was just remembering," he replied. "And you used to be afraid to take a bath, all because of that one time when I let you stay up to watch that holovid-"

"'It Came From the Sewers,'" Xanatos cut in, laughing again. The previous fears of their upcoming Ceremonies dissipated as he recalled his childhood. It was amazing how a sewer monster could change your perspective on what was really scary. "I remember that vid. It gave me the creeps for days." He grinned wickedly. "I still might need you to take a bath with me, sometimes."

"I never could have imagined that we would be together like this, as mates," Qui-Gon said solemnly. "But somehow, even when I was younger, I always wanted us to stay close. I couldn't see my life without you in it -- and I mean really in it, a real part of it." He wrapped his arms tightly around the younger man. "Remember how you used to love to run around the suite naked?" He paused, remembering. "And Orora came over that day, right after your bath-"

"I don't remember that," Xanatos weakly protested against Qui-Gon's broad chest, still smiling. "And if I don't remember doing it, then it doesn't count against me."

Qui-Gon pulled back just enough to lift Xanatos's chin, and planted a soft, lingering kiss on the lips. "Well, I remember," he replied, eyes twinkling. "Orora was wearing a new shimmersilk dress -- she had saved up for weeks to buy it, and it was blue. She said it matched my eyes."

Xanatos rolled his own sapphire eyes, but said nothing.

"She came over to show it off," Qui-Gon continued. "And here you came, streaking out of the bathtub, stark naked and soaking wet, bubbles trailing behind you, and you ran right into her! Ruined her dress completely."

"Served her right. 'Matched your eyes,' hah."

Qui-Gon chuckled and held his mate again, breathing in Xanatos's wonderful, clean scent. "But then you said, 'There's something wrong with your dress!' Just like that. She was so angry, she pushed you away from her, knocking you right down onto the floor. And you just stared up at her, and your little lower lip started to quiver-" He paused, remembering. "That's when I became angry."

Xanatos sighed and laid his head on Qui-Gon's shoulder. "Big padrin to the rescue," he teased. "Always looking out for little Xanatos." He looked up at the other man. "Isn't she here today? I thought I saw her name in the guest book."

"Yes, Master Tor and her mate are here, with their padawans," Qui-Gon said. "Why do you ask?"

"Because I think I owe her a dress," Xanatos replied, smiling.

Qui-Gon grinned in return. "So are you ready?"

"Ready as I'll ever be," Xanatos said. He pulled away, but held out his hand. "Let's go."

The bustling hall, filled with their loved ones, halted in hushed, expectant silence as Xanatos and Qui-Gon entered. They slowly made their way through the crowd, smiling in recognition at friends and padras members. Ghani and Ketrin gave especially broad, knowing grins, and Qui-Gon remembered the basket Mace had found. He wondered if they'd had a hand in it, and exactly just what was inside those little boxes...

The crowd had parted for the two men and they quickly reached the front of the room, where a cupola had been erected, decorated simply with bright, white flowers from one of the gardens. Mace, resplendent and dignified even in his rough, everyday uniform, stood silently next to a beaming Mara. Beside her stood the two proud masters, Yoda and Yaddle, looking as though they could almost burst with happiness. All of their hard work had come to fruition on this day.

"My padawan. Masters, Councilor Windu." Qui-Gon took the lead, as he gently led Xanatos to his place next to him. He gave the little girl a quick wink, making her giggle.

"Mara, sweetheart. My masters. Councilor Windu." Xanatos nodded solemnly to each as he spoke, still looking a bit apprehensive. There was no turning back now without causing an uproar, but he conducted himself with a steely calm that would have been the envy of many a Jedi master.

Mace gave a warm smile in understanding and held out his hand. In it was a smallish cube. A Jedi holocron.

"Qui-Gon Jinn, Xanatos Kenobi, please face each other," he said. Addressing the crowd beyond, he began. "As a member of the High Council, duty often dictates that I often oversee some of the more unhappy and difficult aspects of Jedi life. But, in balance, occasionally I have the privilege of also overseeing some of life's more joyous moments as well. So it is with great pleasure that I stand before you -- fellow members of the Great Padras of the Order -- to help usher in a new stage of life for two of our own." He looked to the men in front of him. "It is an honor they have bestowed upon all of us, that we may witness their union today."

Holding the holocron up to the assembled Jedi, Mace continued. "As the Master of Rites and Ceremonies, I now call upon Master Divina Adner, gatekeeper of one of the most cherished holocrons of our Order -- the one which tells of whence we came, so that we may know where we are headed."

Stepping next to Qui-Gon, Mace closed his eyes and lightly squeezed the cube in his hand, summoning the gatekeeper through the Force. A small hologram of the long dead Jedi master appeared, seemingly floating serenely above the ground.

*Mace Windu, why have you summoned me?* she asked in a languorous, creaky voice.

"Origin, Master Adner, if you please," Mace simply said.

The hologram paused, as if accessing the information. Finally, she began to speak:

*Long ago, when the Republic was still very new, there lived a people on a planet whose name has long since been lost to the ages. It was a peaceful world, an agrarian culture, living in villages along the great bend of an even greater river.

*Their lives were hard, but they set aside one time, during the night when the planet's moon shone the brightest, to gather under the grand trees that grew along the river banks. These times were special, usually celebrations of birth, or of a life well lived, or of a coming together of two souls. And these trees were special, for the people could sense them, could feel them grow, and die, and the people knew when the trees were happy, and when they were sad.

*These trees, the ming'pa trees, had large, beautiful white flowers that glowed under the moonlight. Of course, the blossoms glowed the brightest when the moon was full, and provided ample light for the people as they danced and sang and celebrated their lives.

*After a time, the agrarian society changed and grew due to the invention of new technologies. But a few remained in the original villages and still followed the ways of their ancestors, coming together every time their moon was full, to commune under the trees and wonder the ways of the Light produced by the ming'pa flowers.

*These people eventually learned the secrets of the ming'pa, and could communicate directly to the trees, thereby acquiring more knowledge. The others, the ones who left the villages, held these learned few in high esteem, and called them the Pa'Dao, or the ones who followed the Way of the Light.

*When others from the galaxy finally reached this unnamed planet, they were also amazed at the wonders of the ming'pa trees, and wanted to follow the Way as well. The Pa'Dao grew in number, until their Light and their learning touched the entire galaxy.

*Sometimes, when the Dark threatens us, we look to our strength and our courage; our intelligence and power in the Force will guide us, we say. But truly, we need only to rely on the Light that has always been there before us, and will be there forever after. Trust in the Light, padawans, and learn.*

The hologram smiled, slowly turned to bow to Mace Windu, and disappeared.

Mace, who had been silently following the narrative -- he knew the words by heart now -- lowered his hand and placed the holocron in a concealed pocket in his robe.

"Walking together in the Padao means embracing the four indestructibles," Mace continued solemnly. "Awareness, Meaning, Love, and the Force. Awareness of each other's moods, desires, emotions; the willingness to understand and accept the other's meaning in this crude life; the love you have for each other and the love you share with those around you; and lastly, your lives in the Force, that which sustains us in all matters.

He turned to the two men before him. "Qui-Gon Jinn. Xanatos Kenobi. Are you prepared to pledge yourself to each other in the manner of the four indestructibles, before those who have gathered to witness this Bonding?"

Qui-Gon and Xanatos, who had kept their eyes on each other during both the gatekeeper's recitation and Mace's speech, simultaneously turned to the Councilor and replied, "We do."

"Then in front of all present, seal your covenant to each other."

This was it. Xanatos drew a deep breath and looked into his new mate's remarkable eyes. "I love you," he whispered, leaning forward.

"As I love you, my mate," Qui-Gon replied softly, smiling. He stepped into the younger man's offered embrace, as their mouths met...

There could have been a quickly shushed whoop from somewhere in the middle of Saleeh Hall, but neither Qui-Gon nor Xanatos were aware of it. Indeed, it wasn't until Mace cleared his throat a second time that the newly Bonded pair finally separated.

Mace was grinning in amusement. "Xanatos Kenobi. Qui-Gon Jinn. Walk in the Light together. And may the Force be with you. Always."

The gathering erupted into joyful noise, and this time, no one was shushed.

Ghani and Ketrin cornered Xanatos, sitting alone on a couch, while Qui-Gon was swept away by Kai Khan and some other padrins.

"So. Feeling sore?"

Xanatos, still drifting from the euphoria of the recent ceremony, neatly walked into the trap. "Oh, not much now-" Mentally he slapped himself. Of all the people to confess to being sore-

But Ghani only smirked. "Pay up," he said, holding a hand out to his lover.

Ketrin smiled good-naturedly after draining his glass. "Bite me."

"What?" Xanatos should have known better than to carry on the conversation, but Ghani was up to something. "Pay up for what?"

"Ket bet me that you and Qui-Gon would wait until after your Branding before having sex," Ghani replied matter-of-factly. "But I know you, Kenobi. You wanted it so bad-"

"Ghani!" Xanatos felt his face turning red as he quickly looked away from his friend. "It's none of your business-"

"Oh, come on, Xan," Ghani cut in. "You asked me enough questions about sex to make it my business." He leaned across Ketrin, his hands on the other man's thighs. "So give. How was it?"

Xanatos sighed, as if in resignation, but all three men knew better. He was dying to share his first time experience, and who better than with his two closest friends -- specifically, the one friend who gave him false information?

"It hurt," he said. "A lot. And there was blood."

Ghani's eyes were wide. "Force, Xan! Are you all right? Didn't you use the lubricant?"

"Of course we did!" Xanatos said hotly. "But we almost didn't need it at all. It certainly didn't happen the way you said it would."

Ketrin pressed a smile against his glass as Ghani sputtered, indignant. "I told you it would hurt! But if Qui-Gon had been careful-"

"He was careful," Xanatos said. "But we had to stop a couple of times. We finally ended up with me on top."

Now Ketrin spoke up. "On top?" he asked. "You mean you didn't try it with him taking you from behind? That's the easiest way for first-timers-"

Xanatos blushed again, but not in embarrassment. The vision of Qui-Gon behind him... large hands on holding him down... fucking him... He suppressed a shiver. "We didn't think of it," he said lamely, his mouth dry. Where was Qui-Gon?

"Xan, you idiot!" Ghani laughed. "Wouldn't it occur to you that-" he paused, still chuckling. "Well, no, I guess it wouldn't. It's not like I ever got that far with you to show you..." There was a sudden glint in his bright blue eyes. "But I bet the pain wasn't only because it was your first time, was it?" he said, grinning evilly now. "I bet that everything is proportioned very nicely on Qui-Gon, huh? Such a huge man-"

Ketrin laughed as Xanatos turned a lovely shade of red. Jokes at his expense he could handle. Qui-Gon's body parts were nobody else's business.

When the two men continued to wait in expectant mirth, Xanatos managed to stammer, "Yes. Yes it is." He regained enough of his composure to add, "He's much bigger than what I was used to previously." He trained an eloquent gaze on Ghani as Ketrin broke down completely.

"What's so funny!?"

"Yes, what's so funny?" Qui-Gon had sauntered up to the three men and plopped down on the couch, next to his new bondmate. Nuzzling Xanatos's temple, he murmured, smiling, "Are they bothering you, baby? Shall I take care of them for you?"

Xanatos rolled his eyes, although he was also smiling. Leaning in to his lover's touch, he replied, "I already took care of it." He turned to Ketrin, who seemed mesmerized by Qui-Gon's lap. "Don't you need a new drink?" he asked pointedly, one elegant eyebrow raised.

Ketrin looked up and grinned at getting caught in the act. "I guess I do. Want one?" When the other man shook his head, he jumped off the couch and held out his free hand. "Come on, Ghani Let's leave the lovers alone."

"But I wanted-"

"Now, Ghani." He nodded at his friends. "We'll see you at the Branding."

Ghani humphed but got off the couch. "Did you at least check out the basket? When we heard that Qui-Gon was back, we figured-" he stopped, as his lover made a show at looking at his empty glass. "Ket and I spent weeks finding just the right presents for you." He tilted his head. "And just where were you two last night, anyway? We rang the door but no one answered. We had to leave it in the hallway-"

That reminded Qui-Gon. "Last night?" he asked. "Not this morning?"

Ghani shook his head as Ketrin looked puzzled. "No, it was last night, just a few hours after Xan left the Knighting Party. Why?"

Qui-Gon shrugged. "Oh, nothing."

"What was that about?" Xanatos asked, when his friends had gone. "What basket?"

"We'll talk to Mace about it later," was the cryptic reply.

Ki-Adi-Mundi looked out over the sea of people, finally spying the guests of honor, plus one, walking toward him. Smiling, he commented, "They look happy."

Mace popped another chooca bean in his mouth. "They'd better be," he grumbled. "With all they've put us through-"

"Quiet," Depa chided. "Here they come." She beamed. " Qui-Gon, Xanatos. Congratulations." She bent down, adding, "This must be an exciting day for you as well, little one."

"Thank you, Depa," Qui-Gon replied, smiling indulgently as his padawan blushed and hid behind Xanatos's leg. He turned to her mate. "It was a beautiful ceremony, Mace, thank you. But tell me the truth, aren't you a bit relieved that this is finally over?"

Mace Windu smiled, looking strangely uncomfortable as he avoided Xanatos's gaze. "May you and Xanatos love as hard as you fight," he said solemnly, raising his glass. Ki started, then burst out laughing.

Qui-Gon opened his mouth to protest, but Xanatos just joined in the laughter and took hold of his mate's hand, keeping hold of Mara's hand with the other. He was enjoying the day far too much to let the amiable gibes bother him. He even found himself regretting more than once today that Aden Pura had declined his invitation to attend...

"Any words of wisdom on how to stay happily bonded, Master Windu?" he asked, eyes sparkling with mirth.

Depa laughed, a cheerful, lyrical tone. "Oh, don't ask him -- he has to work hard at it, sometimes," she said, winking. Mace turned to his colleague for help, but Ki was busy staring into his drink.

"You can field this one alone, Councilor," the Cerean said.

"Living with this wonderful woman requires no work at all," he declared, giving Depa an 'I'm so smooth' smirk as she rolled her eyes.

"That's not what you said last night-"

Qui-Gon cut in as Xanatos made a move to cover Mara's ears. "Speaking of last night," he said. "Knights Stoa and Shri'ket gave us the basket in honor of our Bonding, and they said they left it outside our door. But my padril didn't say anything about it when she came over early this morning -- and I didn't see it, either. Where was it when you found it?"

Mace quickly turned away; when he looked back, he was as serene as if he were running a Council session. But Qui-Gon knew better. "Was it out in the hallway?" he pressed, as the group grew quiet, suddenly interested.

"It was," Mace replied calmly. "I walked by your suite earlier last night, and saw it there. I took it home with me, intending to bring it to you later this morning-"

Depa frowned, confused, but said nothing. Xanatos, who still hadn't caught on, said, "But what's so important about where the basket was? What are you talking about?"

Qui-Gon only shook his head. "Thank you for being so considerate," he said, smiling knowingly. He turned to his new padras. "Shall we go find Master Yaddle and Master Yoda? Excuse us, please."

As they walked away, Ki rounded on his friend. "Would you like to tell us what in Arca's good name that was all about?"

"He thinks he knows everything," Mace muttered darkly.

Depa laughed again, now understanding. "Does this have anything to do with why you looked so disturbed when you came home last night?"

As her mate continued glowering in silence, she gleefully cried, "I'm right! And that's why you weren't surprised when Master Eng showed up at our door this morning, saying that her padrins would be Bonding after all-"

"You knew?" Ki interrupted, a puzzled look on his face. "But how- Wait. You went in Qui-Gon's suite, didn't you!" He burst into laughter. "Of course you did. You're keyed for his home, as I am. What did you do, interrupt them, Councilor? Offer suggestions? Or did you merely want to watch?"

Mace gave a heavy sigh, knowing that this wouldn't remain with his mate and his friend for long -- he was already dreading the next High Council session. "No! But I... heard them," he grated, through clenched teeth. "And let me tell you, that Xanatos is loud..."

The people around them abruptly fell silent in stunned amazement, as two members of the venerated High Council collapsed into laughter.

Xanatos floated through his Bonding reception in excellent humor. Qui-Gon never left his side -- one padril remarked how they seemed to 'invade each other's space so naturally' now -- and Mara spent her time either on his lap or in Qui-Gon's arms, quietly enduring pinched cheeks and gentle tugs on her padawan braid.

And all too quickly, it was time to slip away from their guests to leave for the Branding Hall. Unlike their Bonding, the Branding Ceremony would be done with only a handful of people present: Branding Master D'Mer, her apprentice, Mace Windu, and Yoda.

"But why can't we go with them?" Mara asked Master Yaddle, who also remained behind.

"Your training bond," Yaddle explained. "Strong, it is. Feel more of his pain, you would, my darling one."

Mara's eyes grew wide. "P-pain?"

Yaddle smiled reassuringly. "The Branding requires it. But never fear," she added. "Feel it, you would not. Many powerful friends you have, many powerful friends."

Mara frowned, her small face attesting her attempt to understand what was happening to her beloved master and his mate. "But can't my friends help them?"

Oppo Rancisis, who was floating nearby, came up and tousled her hair. "The pain is theirs to bear," he said kindly. "We are here to ensure that it will not escape into the general populace-" he paused as a bell, somewhere above in one of the spires of the Temple, began its somber toll. "Shhh -- it's about to begin. Do not fret, little one. This will be over quickly."

Depa moved to the front of the room. "It is time," she announced. She nodded to Ki standing next to her, who closed his eyes. The rest soon followed.

Master Yaddle reached for Mara's hand and squeezed it tightly. "Close your eyes, sweetheart," she said.

The guests in the hall took a collective breath and reached out into the Force.

"If this hurts, I'm going to kill him," Ghani muttered to his lover.

"Quiet," Ketrin hissed. "It's starting."

The ripple through the Force was barely discernible at first -- just a glimpse of something bigger and more wonderful than oneself. Several people shuddered as the wave increased and finally flowed over the congregated guests like the morning fog over the Minnerai mountains.

"They have drunk the elixir," Depa called out. "The essence of effrikim potion is diluted, but some of you will feel the effects of it, regardless. Be on your guard."

Ghani opened his eyes and looked over at Ketrin, who sensed his lover's movement and raised his head. "Induces endorphins and helps them connect to each other," he whispered, his eyes still closed. "Now get back into the Force."

Ghani lowered his head, sensing his midichlorians reach for that unknowable area of himself.

Suddenly, he could swear that he could hear the hiss of red-hot metal on skin, smell the searing flesh that made his stomach rumble in disturbing ways.

And then he could feel them, his friends, could almost see it happening: Xanatos and Qui-Gon standing on the Branding platform, hands flat on the weathered stone between them, their heads hanging between their shoulders. Xanatos was swaying a bit as all aspects of the Force communicated with all of his midichlorians, all at once.

Ghani thought he heard singing.

The pain of Branding, dampened as it was by Mace Windu and Yoda in the Branding Hall, was still shocking in its intensity. More tightly focused than even a 'saber burn, it shot through the Force with needle-like precision, much as the residual effects of the effrikim potion had gracefully blanketed it earlier.

Several gasps were heard throughout the hall as some were caught off guard. Ghani's hands flashed numb, then a buzzing, more felt than heard, lightly skipped up his spine and embedded itself in the base of his skull. He clenched his jaws to prevent them from chattering.

But Yoda was the most powerful Jedi the Order had seen in a millennia, and as quickly as the pain hit, it dissipated, leaving only echoes of discomfort, only mildly irritating.

The hall stirred, subdued voices rumbling as people broke into consciousness and started cataloging the various aches and pains. Brandings affected each person differently, and some not at all.

"That wasn't as bad as I thought it would be."

"When do you think we can visit them?"

"Mara, come home with me, you shall."

"Is Master all right, Master Yaddle?"

"Mace slept soundly for hours after his last Branding. It completely wore him out."

"This is my third, but it's his fifth. We once went to a Branding on Chandrila where we didn't even know the couple. I'm quite immune to any pain by now."

Ketrin shook his head, coming out of his meditation, and saw his lover collapse/sit on the floor with a heavy whump. "Ghani -- are you all right?"

Ghani rubbed the back of his neck absently. "I'm going to have a headache all week," he complained. "And I almost broke a tooth."

Ketrin shook his head, smiling fondly at the young knight. "Just think of what Xanatos and Qui-Gon are feeling right now," he said. He rolled back his shoulders -- he had felt a sharp twinge between his shoulder blades at the moment of Branding, and now it was itching like mad. He held out his hand. "Come on. Let's go home. I need a long back scratch."

Xanatos lay face-down on his bed, in more pain than he'd ever felt in his life. Even breaking his ankle as a child was nothing compared to this. The Branding had been bearable while he was flying on the effrikim essence, but now, with only a hypospray of mild bacta for his burn, he was miserable.

"Time for another shot," he said weakly, out of one side of his mouth.

Qui-Gon, in the 'fresher applying his own dose of bacta, carefully walked over to the bed and spritzed a light mist of the medicinal liquid over the small of Xanatos's back. The stylized "JK," which had looked so elegant crafted in metal, was a red, angry wound on the skin, more terrifying for its deliberate infliction.

"You'll feel better once the bacta kicks in again," he said, with knowing sympathy. "But we can't use too much of this, in case the burn heals too well and leaves only a light scar. You wouldn't want to go through the Branding again, would you?"

His own back felt as if it were on fire, but years of Jedi training had taught him stoic endurance. It was also a small, but welcome, consolation to know that someone else was sharing this pain, and that countless others had suffered the same fate. This was part of something grander than the two of them.

Xanatos grunted and turned his head to face his new mate. "Whose bright idea was this again?" he grumbled.

Qui-Gon chuckled in spite of himself. "Close your eyes and try to sleep," he suggested. He looked at the chrono next to the bed. "We've had a very long day." Reaching down, he softly added a small Force suggestion to his words, hoping at least to ease his mate's discomfort a bit, so he could rest. After all, Xanatos had not only had to deal with the Bonding/Branding Ceremonies, but also his own Knighting and the events leading up to it. Not to mention the night before...

"But we haven't gone through Ghani and Ket's present," Xanatos said, voice already slurring with sleep. "And how long do we have before we have to go back out on missions? I haven't seen the assignment roster yet. Where's Mara? Will she be here tomorrow?"

"Shhh, Xan, sleep," Qui-Gon said, reaching over slowly to caress the dark head. "We have a whole week to recover -- we'll get everything straightened out by then." Holding up his arm, he gathered enough strength to call the remote sensor to the holovid projector into his hand. Usually he couldn't abide such crass laziness, but felt justified tonight.

Sitting up to keep his back off the bed, Qui-Gon placed a large hand on Xanatos's head and continued to caress it gently. Soon, the light snoring indicated that, despite the pain, the younger man had indeed fallen asleep.

But Qui-Gon couldn't afford to, not yet. Clicking on the holovid player, he smiled as a familiar, much beloved figure marched across the screen in his new uniform, no longer in the creams of a padawan but in the darker hues of a full-fledged Knight of the Order. He watched as Master Yoda, master to them both, proudly snipped off the black padawan braid and handed it to his now former apprentice. He caught a glimpse of Master Yaddle with Mara, looking on proudly. It was she who had ensured that Qui-Gon would get this holovid tonight. Just another item on a long list of things he owed her for.

Mace's rich voice filled the room, forcing Qui-Gon to turn down the volume. "As there is a beginning to every end, so the Knighting Ceremony signifies the end of your days as padawan learners, and the start of a new life as Jedi knights..."

The flickering blue of the holovid played on Qui-Gon face as he watched the man he loved take his rightful place as a full member of the Order. The same man who now shared his bed, and his life.

END