Master Apprentice  Archive Golden Anniversary |
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Archive: MA, any others just ask, I probably won't say no
My Home Page: http://www.jediphiles.com/~mali
Category: 1st time; PWP; romance
Rating: NC17
Pairing: Q/O
Summary: Fifty years after they became lovers, Qui-Gon, while waiting for Obi-Wan to come home, remembers back to the beginning and then plans a special homecoming surprise for their Golden Anniversary.
Disclaimer: These beautiful boys aren't mine, they belong to George. I'm just playing with them for a bit. I promise to put them back when I'm done. Don't sue - I've got no money. I've spent it all on seeing TPM way too many times and buying SW toys and feeding my Liam obsession.
Feedback: Oh yes, please. Good, bad or indifferent
Notes: First of all, to all my friends in MIRC who continually nag . . . er . . . encouraged me to work on this, I thank you all. L-Hawk, Sage, Sheltie, Kris, Gaia, Sa, Bant, Bastet, Obi-Ki, Catnip and I sure hope I didn't forget anyone. If I did, I'm sorry. To L-Hawk, who played countless games of Literati with me while I wrote, thank you. And to my wise and wonderful Master, for her most excellent beta, I bow in humble gratitude to her greatness, even if I didn't actually take ALL of her suggestions. In the end, of course, all mistakes are still mine.
Additionally: -[. . .]- denotes flashback scenes.
Qui-Gon pressed the RECORD button on the side of his digilog, and began to speak. [[Obi-Wan will be home tomorrow. I find I miss him more and more each time he is gone.]]
He released the button and sat staring out at the quiet lake, the darkness broken only by the lights from the stars twinkling in the sky high above him. With at least four hours to go before dawn, Qui-Gon had chosen to enjoy the peace and serenity of the small lake instead of spending any more time tossing and turning in his lonely bed.
[[No, that's not true,]] he said, after depressing the RECORD button again. [[I have always missed him terribly whenever we spend more than just a few days apart. From the very beginning it has been this way.]] He moved his finger from the RECORD button to the READENTRY button, and quickly paged back through decades of entries until he came to the one he was looking for. Though he could recite the passage word for word from memory, he preferred hearing it from his digilog, and did so often. It was recorded a few hours after he and Obi-Wan made love for the first time, and listening to his words from that night so long ago always brought him joy.
[[The Force has given me my deepest desire, and I cannot imagine ever being happier than I am in this moment.]] Qui-Gon allowed the familiar memories to fill his mind and his heart. [[My Padawan lies sleeping in my bed, where just a few hours ago, we made love for the first time. It was difficult for me to leave him, but I knew I could not rest until I recorded my thoughts and feelings.]]
Qui-Gon looked up from the words on the tiny screen and stared, unseeing, out over the lake. Time shifted, and he was back in the Temple on Coruscant, sitting on the floor of his bedroom, his back against the far wall. He didn't want to wake Obi-Wan, so he was speaking quietly into his digilog, his eyes never leaving the sleeping form of the young man in his bed.
[[It seems I've spent my entire life waiting for this night, even though I could not put into words what I was waiting for until a few years ago. When I finally admitted to myself I was in love with Obi-Wan.]]
[[I remember the hours spent on my knees, as I looked to the Force for guidance. He was my Padawan, first and foremost, and I would do nothing that would in any way adversely affect his training. And I remember the way I felt when I had my answer from the Force. We would be together, in time. I took that to mean it was not to happen until after he was Knighted.]]
Qui-Gon smiled to himself, as he always did when he remembered this part. Obi-Wan had soon set him straight about that.
[[Not long after his twentieth name day, we spoke about our feelings for one another, and I told him why I thought we should wait. I knew he was disappointed, but I assumed he understood the reasons for my decision and would respect those reasons.]]
[[It came as quite a shock, therefore, when he came to me a few weeks ago, and told me he was no longer willing to wait. This occurred the day before he was to spend a fortnight off planet with a group of other Senior Padawans, their first mission sans Masters.]]
[[Our discussion quickly disintegrated into a quarrel. Or as much of a quarrel as I would permit at the time, under the circumstances. ]]
The years slipped away, and Qui-Gon was once again transported back to that time so long ago.
-[. . .]-"I love you, Qui-Gon Jinn. And I know you love me. I'm well on my way to Knighthood, you've made sure of that, and I just don't understand why you think we need to wait."
"Obi-Wan," Qui-Gon said, trying to remain calm and in control, "as long as I am your Master . . ."
Obi-Wan's cheeks were flushed with emotion. "This is not about you being my Master," he interrupted hotly. "This is about the two of us as men, not Jedi. It's about two adults in love, doing what two people in love do together."
"No, that's where you're wrong." Qui-Gon spoke softly, determined not to get angry. "We can't just stop being Jedi when it's convenient. Nor can I stop being your Master in order to be your lover."
"You know that's not what I'm saying. For a man with such a brilliant mind, you can be incredibly obtuse at times."
Qui-Gon could tell the younger man was struggling to keep his frustration in check.
"I see no reason to re-hash this discussion," Qui-Gon said firmly. "We made a decision based on what I believe is best for us."
"You made the decision!"
"Based on what I believed was best for you. For us." Qui-Gon could feel his own anger begin to rise. He was seated at his desk with his chair swiveled around so he could look at Obi-Wan, who sat on the edge of Qui-Gon's bed. "Do you think I'd do anything to risk your Knighthood?"
"Do you think I would?" he shot back. "Qui-Gon, I've spent my entire life training to be a Jedi. And yet you are going to sit there and tell me you think I would do anything to risk my Knighthood? That I'm not capable at this point in my life to decide whether or not I can handle a relationship with you?" -[. . .]-
Qui-Gon pressed the PAUSE button, a soft smile on his face. Obi-Wan was always passionate about the things he believed in. About the things he wanted. Qui-Gon's smile grew a bit wider. And there were definite advantages to being in love with a man of such fiery passions.
With a quiet chuckle, he released the PAUSE button, easily slipping back into his memories. [[I reminded him of his duty. It was a reprimand, of sorts, and he finally backed down. But I couldn't leave well enough alone.]]
-[. . .]-"Do you think this is the best use of your time, Obi-Wan, considering you will be going on a mission in less than twelve hours?"
Obi-Wan stared at his Master a long moment, and then with a resigned sigh, he dropped his eyes to the floor. "Always the Master," he mumbled despairingly, his shoulders sagging slightly.
His disappointment weighed heavily in the air between them, and before Qui-Gon realized what he was doing, he'd left his chair and dropped to his knees in front of the younger man. "Just a while longer," Qui-Gon whispered softly. He took Obi-Wan's face in his hands and forced him to look into his eyes. "I know it's hard to wait for something you want, especially if you aren't sure you agree with the reason for waiting."
Obi-Wan looked at Qui-Gon, his face filled with emotions that tugged at the older man's heart. "It would be easier if I even understood the reason we must wait," he said softly, all the fight gone from his voice. "You've always said 'live in the moment' and 'feel, don't think' and my favorite, 'your focus determines your reality' and yet none of that seems to matter when it comes to you and me. Do you not believe your own teachings?"
"Above all else, I believe in following the will of the Force, Obi-Wan. Regardless of what I want, or what I think I need. Live in the moment, yes. But only after you are well-seated in the Force. Feel, don't think, refers to allowing the Force to guide you without question. And your focus determines your reality, but only as long as you are first and foremost focused on the Force."
Another tired sigh. "I know, Qui-Gon. I was just . . ." He closed his eyes and tried to pull his head from Qui-Gon's hands. "You're right, I've got plenty of things to do before I leave tomorrow."
"Look at me, Obi-Wan." -[. . .]-
[[I couldn't bear to see him so defeated. Before I could stop myself I leaned forward and pressed my lips gently against his. It was right. This was right. Obi-Wan made a strangled sounding groan, and then his hands were on either side of my face and his mouth was opening under mine. Our first kiss, and it was beyond anything I'd imagined. Soft and sweet with just a hint of the underlying passion both of us managed to keep at bay. At least for now. I allowed myself just a taste of him, nothing more than that, because I knew if I didn't stop us, I would soon be lost. ]]
-[. . .]-One final brush of his lips against Obi-Wan's, and Qui-Gon pulled away. "I love you, Obi-Wan," Qui-Gon whispered huskily.
Obi-Wan swallowed hard and slowly opened his eyes. He was lovely, and Qui-Gon wanted to devour him. And one thing more . . . Qui-Gon was beginning to suspect he'd misunderstood the Force on how long they were supposed to wait.
"What was that all about?" Obi-Wan asked somewhat breathlessly.
"Live in the moment, my young Padawan," Qui-Gon chuckled. "Feel, don't think. Remember those?"
"Qui-Gon?" He was looking at his Master as if the older man had lost his mind. Perhaps he had. Being this close to Obi-Wan, feeling the way the Force moved around them when they kissed, was making Qui-Gon a bit lightheaded. He needed some time to sort out what he was feeling. What he thought the Force was telling him.
"Go prepare for your mission, my Padawan," Qui-Gon said, rising to his feet. "We'll speak more of this upon your return."
"Qui-Gon?" he said again, staring, wide-eyed.
Qui-Gon couldn't help but smile at the confused expression Obi-Wan wore. "Perhaps we can meditate on this together, when you return to Coruscant," he said, going back to his desk. "Perhaps between the two of us, we can get a better sense of what the Force wills for us regarding our relationship." He sat down and picked up the datapad he'd been reading earlier. "But for now," he added, turning to face the younger man once more. "I suggest you concentrate on your upcoming mission and how you might best see to its successful fruition. The other members of your team will be counting on you to be mentally prepared and totally focused on your duties." Qui-Gon turned back to his datapad and began reading. Or pretending to.
They'd been together long enough for Obi-Wan to know when to press and when to retreat, much to Qui-Gon's relief. He sat on the edge of Qui-Gon's bed a moment or two longer and then stood and walked to his master's side. He placed a hand on Qui-Gon's shoulder and gave it a gentle squeeze. Qui-Gon looked up at him expectantly.
"That's one meditation I truly look forward to, Master," he said with a smile. And he turned and walked out of the room.
Qui-Gon knew Obi-Wan was confused by his rather cryptic comments, but he wanted to make certain, before he said anything to the younger man. Deep in his heart, however, he was sure. It was time to take their relationship to a deeper level. But, with Obi-Wan leaving in the morning on his first mission without his Master, Qui-Gon knew that night was not the night. Nor would it have been fair to even say anything to Obi-Wan. He needed all of his attention to be on the mission and not on what waited for him upon his return. It would be enough that one of them would be thinking of that and little else during the next fortnight.
Qui-Gon spent the better portion of their time apart in deep meditation. He opened himself fully to the Force, allowing its truth and serenity to fill him for days at a time. He spent long hours in the more secluded gardens of the Temple, in deep communion with the Living Force. He ate little and slept even less, not needing, for a time at least, even the most basic of sustenance and respite. It had been many years since he'd had the opportunity, or, even more importantly, a reason to immerse himself so fully in the Force, and the experience was indescribable.
With five days left before Obi-Wan's return, Qui-Gon finally had the answers he sought. The assurances he needed. His love for Obi-Wan was strong and true, and any doubts he had about being able to find a balance between being Obi-Wan's Master and being his lover were gone. As Obi-Wan was a Senior Padawan and well past the age of majority for his race, getting the Council's consent wasn't necessary. However, out of respect for his Master, and in difference to the Council, Qui-Gon nevertheless put in a formal request for their approval of his intentions to begin a sexual relationship with Obi-Wan. His request was approved without reservation, giving him one more affirmation of the rightness of his decision.
The last few days of waiting were difficult, to say the least. As Obi-Wan's Master, Qui-Gon was anxious to hear how he was faring on his mission, even though he knew he would be getting the evaluator's report several days after his return. And Qui-Gon missed Obi-Wan. This was the first time they'd been apart for longer than a day or three since Obi-Wan had become Qui-Gon's Padawan, and he hadn't realized how much he'd grown used to the younger man being by his side. Obi-Wan had become so much more than just Qui-Gon's apprentice. He'd become a fine companion and a true friend. And soon he would become Qui-Gon's lover. -[. . .]-
[[I knew through our bond, even muted as it was for the duration of his mission, the moment he entered Coruscant air space. It would still be several hours before he would make it back to our quarters, so I busied myself with various Council reports and even managed a bit of meditating. Shortly before third meal, the door of our rooms opened with a soft swish, and he was home.]]
-[. . .]-"Master," Obi-Wan said, giving a slight bow. "It's good to be home."
He hung his robe on the rack near the door, and set his pack on the floor. He looked good, and Qui-Gon could tell by his body language the mission must have gone well. "I've missed you," Obi-Wan said, somewhat shyly. He moved towards Qui-Gon, a small smile playing about his lips.
"I've missed you, too, Obi-Wan." Qui-Gon pulled him into his arms and hugged him tightly. "Both by my side and . . ." Qui-Gon hesitated, and Obi-Wan pulled back to look up at him, "and in my thoughts," Qui-Gon continued.
He grinned, the smile easily lighting up his eyes. "Isn't there something you can do about that, Master?"
They were talking about the mandatory dampening of their bond which was required during Obi-Wan's mission. "I'll be glad to," Qui-Gon said, still holding the young in his arms. Obi-Wan didn't seem anxious to move away, which was perfectly fine with Qui-Gon. The Master closed his eyes and focused on their bond, and with a bit of mental manipulation, was able to reopen their connection.
Obi-Wan sighed softly and rested his head on Qui-Gon's chest. "Much better," he said, as their bond brightened and filled between them.
Qui-Gon held him close, enjoying his nearness, enjoying even more the feel of their bond coming alive. He was glad of the comfort level between them that allowed them to embrace so easily, glad he'd made it a point to hug him often during their years together.
"So," Qui-Gon said, finally pulling away from Obi-Wan. They both had much to talk about, but the things Qui-Gon wanted to say needed to wait till later. "Why don't you put your things away while I prepare something for third meal. Then you can tell me all about your mission." -[. . .]-
Qui-Gon had no need to actually see or hear the rest of the entry from that night. The words scrolled past, his voice droned on, both unneeded as Qui-Gon reveled in the memory of sight, sound, touch, smell and taste that no journal entry could express.
-[. . .]-After stowing his gear and taking a quick shower, Obi-Wan joined his Master at the table for third meal. And they talked. Or, Obi-Wan talked and Qui-Gon listened. The mission had gone extremely well, as Qui-Gon would learn when the evaluator released his report.
Throughout the meal Qui-Gon found himself staring at Obi-Wan, and having to remind himself to listen to what his Padawan was saying. All he really wanted to do was kiss him. Hard. Already the balance between being his Master and being his lover was being defined. When they'd finished eating, they carried the few dishes into the kitchen, and with an ease born of long practice, worked together to put the small room to rights for the evening.
"Obi-Wan," Qui-Gon said, as the last dish was put away. "Would you join me for evening meditation?"
Obi-Wan turned to look at Qui-Gon. "I know I haven't been gone that long," he said, grinning. "Have you forgotten that we always meditate together in the evenings?"
"We meditate at the same time, in the same room, for about the same length of time," Qui-Gon said, softly. "I am asking you to meditate with me tonight."
Obi-Wan stood there in the small kitchen, staring up at Qui-Gon, who merely stood and stared back. Waiting. And then it happened. Obi-Wan's features changed as understanding began to dawn. He took one hesitant step towards Qui-Gon, and then stopped. "Qui-Gon?"
"I've done a lot of thinking about us, while you were gone, Obi-Wan. And I've spent a good many hours in meditation, seeking answers from the Force."
"And?" Obi-Wan prompted.
"And if you are still willing," Qui-Gon said, suddenly feeling very nervous, "I would like it very much if you would allow me the privilege of becoming your lover this night."
"If I am still willing?" Obi-Wan said, a little breathlessly. He took another step towards his Master, one more and they would be toe to toe. "Well, wonder no more, my Master," his whispered, huskily. "For I am indeed," he took the final step. "Very," he reached up and slid his arms around Qui-Gon's neck. "Willing." He leaned up and touched his lips to Qui-Gon's, and with a soft sigh, Qui-Gon wrapped his arms around the younger man. -[. . .]-
[[At last, we kissed.]]
[[His lips were soft and pliable under mine, parting easily when I slid my tongue over them. I accepted the invitation, and slipped my tongue inside his mouth, tasting, savoring, filling my senses with everything that was Obi-Wan. ]]
[[I could have stood there and kissed him forever, it was that good.]]
-[. . .]-Finally the need to draw a full breath outweighed Qui-Gon's desire to lose himself forever in their kiss. He pulled back and looked at Obi-Wan. "Will you join me in meditation, Obi-Wan?" he asked, staring down into eyes that seemed to hold the answers to all of life's mysteries.
Obi-Wan grinned up at his Master. "I've never heard it referred to as meditation before," he teased. "But I'll be happy to join you."
Qui-Gon didn't return his smile. "I am asking you to join me in meditation first," he said, softly. "The joining of our minds before the joining of our bodies."
Obi-Wan didn't speak, but just continued to look up at Qui-Gon, the questions evident on his face.
"I do not take on the role of your lover lightly, Obi-Wan. I want this to be as perfect an experience as possible."
"I want that too, but I don't understand. . ." Obi-Wan began.
"With a true shared meditation," Qui-Gon continued, interrupting him, "our bond can adapt into more than just a training bond. If you are willing, that is."
"A soul bond?" Obi-Wan asked, his voice filled with wonder.
"No, no. Not a soul bond," Qui-Gon said quickly. "More like a pair bond, but better, because we already share such a strong connection."
Obi-Wan leaned up and planted a soft, sweet kiss on Qui-Gon's lips. -[. . .]-
[[I will forever remember the words he spoke so beautifully to me then. "I would be willing to soul bond with you, Qui-Gon." It was all I could do not to take him up on his offer right then and there.]
-[. . .]-Qui-Gon closed his eyes and swallowed back the surge of emotions that suddenly threatened to overwhelm him. "You honor me, Obi-Wan," he said, when he trusted himself to speak. "But you are much to young to even consider such a thing with me."
"Are you planning on falling out of love with me? Or do you think I will one day decide I don't love you?"
"Obi-Wan, . . . I . . . "
"I may be young, Qui-Gon, but I know my heart. And I know my mind. I love you, and I want to spend the rest of my life with you. That's not going to change."
He was so serious that Qui-Gon couldn't help but smile at him. "If that is the case, then we will have plenty of time to discuss forming a soul bond. But today, all I'm asking you is to allow me to expand our training bond to a pair bond."
"Just tell me what to do, Master," he said, smiling again. -[. . .]-
[[Though I'd never actually changed a training bond into a pair bond before, I understood the mechanics of it. It wasn't difficult at all, but I think that was because we were truly following the will of the Force. I doubt it would have gone so smoothly had we not.]]
[[We came out of our meditation together, kneeling across from each other, hands clasped and knees touching. I was instantly aware of him on a much deeper level than I'd even imagined, and judging from his expression, it was fairly intense for him as well. Where the training bond allowed us to get a sense of what the other was feeling, especially if the emotion was strong, the pair bond allowed us a more powerful awareness of each other. We couldn't communicate, per se, but we certainly could get a very good idea of what the other was thinking.]]
-[. . .]-"You are so beautiful," Obi-Wan said, as they opened their eyes. Qui-Gon understood what he meant, for he was thinking the very same thing. He was seeing more of Obi-Wan's heart, more of Obi-Wan's conscious mind, more of what made him Obi-Wan, and it was truly remarkable. Obi-Wan was truly remarkable.
"Let's go to bed, Obi-Wan," Qui-Gon said, softly.
They stood by Qui-Gon's bed, facing each other. No words were spoken, as none were necessary. Everything Qui-Gon needed to know was coming through their bond. Obi-Wan loved him, Obi-Wan desired him, Obi-Wan thought he was magnificent. Inside as well as out.
They took their time, slowly undressing each other, enjoying their time of discovery. They'd seen each other nude before, many times, but this was the first time they looked at one another as lovers.
Only when they were in bed together did they begin to kiss and touch and go about the business of making love. They lay on their sides, facing each other, holding each other, moving together, and it was perfect.
Qui-Gon discovered Obi-Wan's sensitive spots, and Obi-Wan found Qui-Gon's. Qui-Gon kissed Obi-Wan softly and drank from him hungrily, and everything they did was so much better because of their bond. Qui-Gon wanted their first time to last forever, so each time their passion brought them close to the edge, he backed off. He wanted to taste every part of Obi-Wan, commit the young man's smell and his flavor to memory, and he wanted Obi-Wan to want him just as badly as he wanted Obi-Wan. He rolled them over, so that Obi-Wan was underneath him, and kissed him, hard. Obi-Wan's hands were on Qui-Gon's back and in his hair, holding on, while his soft moans urged Qui-Gon on.
Qui-Gon kissed Obi-Wan's lips and sucked on his tongue, licked his ear and nipped at his throat. Obi-Wan writhed sensually beneath him, all the while making noises that nearly drove Qui-Gon mad with desire. Qui-Gon moved lower, leaving a passion mark on Obi-Wan's collar bone, before finding his nipples. His lovely nipples that quickly pebbled and hardened as Qui-Gon licked and sucked first one and then the other.
Qui-Gon moved lower still, tracing the outline of Obi-Wan's abdomen with his tongue, while he continued to flick and pinch Obi-Wan's nipples with his hands. His navel called Qui-Gon next, and the master spent a long time kissing and licking it. He could smell Obi-Wan's arousal growing stronger by the minute, and his mouth practically watered at the thought of his first taste of Obi-Wan's shaft. Of his seed. But still he took his time.
Obi-Wan was whimpering softly, as he tried to arch his hips upwards. Qui-Gon had been carefully avoiding all contact with the young man's shaft, and he didn't need the stronger bond to know Obi-Wan was becoming desperate.
Qui-Gon slid his hands down Obi-Wan's chest, down his stomach, and over to his hips. Holding him still, the master slipped down Obi-Wan's body just a bit more, until he was in the perfect position to worship the young man's cock in the way he'd dreamt of for so many nights.
Wanting to watch Obi-Wan's face as Qui-Gon tasted him for the first time, he looked up, and his breath caught in his throat. Obi-Wan's head was thrown back, exposing his long neck. His face was flushed, his eyes were closed, his lips were slightly bruised and swollen, and he was truly the most exquisite creature Qui-Gon had ever had the good fortune to look upon.
"Obi-Wan," Qui-Gon whispered, desperate to see the young man's eyes. Reddish eyelashes fluttered open, and Obi-Wan was staring down at his master. "Force, Obi-Wan, but you are so beautiful." And before Obi-Wan could say anything, Qui-Gon slipped out his tongue and licked the head of the thick shaft.
Obi-Wan groaned deeply and fell back against the pillows. Qui-Gon licked again, allowing the musky taste of his lover to permeate his senses. He held Obi-Wan's hips firmly, opened his mouth, and swallowed him to the root. The sound Obi-Wan made was unlike anything Qui-Gon had ever heard, and all he could think of was how to get his young lover to make that sound over and over again.
Obi-Wan was so close, and this time, Qui-Gon didn't stop him. He barely had all of Obi-Wan's length in his mouth, scarcely had time to swallow around his girth before Obi-Wan grabbed Qui-Gon's head, let out another one of those amazing groans, and found his release. The taste of his seed exploded in Qui-Gon's mouth and he swallowed greedily, not wanting to lose a single drop.
"Come here," Obi-Wan gasped, tugging at Qui-Gon's hair. "Kiss me. I want to know what I taste like on your tongue." His words sent bolts of desire straight to Qui-Gon's aching cock.
Qui-Gon allowed Obi-Wan to tug him up, and with a feral growl, the young man kissed his master, long and hard. Obi-Wan held Qui-Gon's head firmly in place while he did his best to try and kiss him senseless. His tongue was everywhere at once, demanding entrance to Qui-Gon's mouth, lapping at his palate, sliding over and around his tongue, and it was beyond anything Qui-Gon had ever dreamed it could be.
Obi-Wan rolled them, as he kissed Qui-Gon, ending up on top of his master, and the feel of their bodies sliding against each other was almost more than Qui-Gon could stand. Qui-Gon wanted him. More than he'd ever wanted anything in his life. He grabbed Obi-Wan's hips and tried to hold him still, tried to make him understand what he wanted, what he needed, all without speaking, for Obi-Wan still held Qui-Gon's lips hostage with his own. Qui-Gon tried to roll them again, to take control, but Obi-Wan would have none of it.
"Mine!" he growled hungrily, when Qui-Gon finally had to break for air. And Qui-Gon was his, of this he had no doubt. Obi-Wan raised up just enough to be able to look down at Qui-Gon. "Mine to love," he said, his voice going soft and deep. "Mine to make love to. Mine to make love to me. Mine for tonight. Mine for all time!" He stared down at his master, daring the other man to dispute his claims. As if Qui-Gon could even if he wanted to.
Qui-Gon stared back up at him, and without a moment's hesitation, allowed everything he was feeling to fill their bond. All of his love for the young man, all of his desire, his trust, everything he was feeling, Qui-Gon gladly shared with Obi-Wan. He held nothing back, knowing that in this role, as his lover, he never would again.
Obi-Wan gasped softly as their bond was flooded with emotion, and then he was kissing Qui-Gon once more. He was hard again, Qui-Gon could feel the young man's shaft pressed against the inside of his thigh, burning him like a brand. And suddenly Qui-Gon wanted to be branded by Obi-Wan. He wanted to have Obi-Wan inside himself, and that wasn't something he'd wanted in a long, long time.
Qui-Gon reached blindly towards the table next to his bed, and somehow managed to find the small tube of lubricant he'd put there earlier. He flipped off the cap, squeezed a small bit of the cool gel into his palm, and tossed the tube in the general direction of the table. He slid his hand between their bodies, found Obi-Wan's turgid shaft, and quickly spread the lubricant over his hardness.
As soon as Qui-Gon's hand touched Obi-Wan's shaft, the young man hissed sharply and jerked his head back, so that he could look down at his master. "Take what is yours, Obi-Wan," Qui-Gon said, softly. Obi-Wan's eyes widened as understanding dawned, and then he leaned down and pressed a gentle kiss against Qui-Gon's lips. "I'm honored by your trust, Qui-Gon," he murmured.
Qui-Gon reached down and grabbed his thighs, pulling his legs up and back. Obi-Wan pushed himself up on his knees, between Qui-Gon's spread legs, and placed his hands over Qui-Gon's. He was staring at Qui-Gon, and Qui-Gon wanted to lose himself in the love he saw in Obi-Wan's eyes.
"I want you inside of me, Obi-Wan."
Obi-Wan leaned towards the other man, and Qui-Gon felt the head of Obi-Wan's shaft press against the opening of his body. It was going to hurt, he knew that, as it had been many, many years since he'd allowed another man to take him in such a way. But Qui-Gon wanted to experience it all. He wanted Obi-Wan to bring him from the pain of being taken unprepared to the pleasure he knew would follow. If Obi-Wan was going to own Qui-Gon, he would own all of him.
Obi-Wan pressed forward, and Qui-Gon could tell he was trying to be careful. Trying not to cause his lover any more pain than he had to. His hands squeezed Qui-Gon's, and Qui-Gon was glad Obi-Wan was squeezing his hands and not his thighs. The young man held his bottom lip between his teeth as he focused on what he was doing.
"Do it," Qui-Gon ground out. It did hurt, but he was anxious to get past the pain. With a grunt of effort, Obi-Wan pushed harder, and the head of his shaft slipped inside Qui-Gon. Obi-Wan hesitated, trying to gauge how much pain his master was in, but Qui-Gon shook his head. "Keep going," he groaned harshly.
Obi-Wan groaned once and shuddered, and then pushed himself deeper. It burned. Force, it burned. Qui-Gon was gritting his teeth in an effort not to call out, to tell him to stop. And then Obi-Wan was all the way in, and the burning sensation changed to real pain along with a sense of fullness. Qui-Gon fought the urge to push Obi-Wan out and forced himself to relax.
Obi-Wan waited, watching Qui-Gon.
Qui-Gon closed his eyes, took a deep breath, and willed himself to get past the pain. He felt Obi-Wan move slightly, and then Obi-Wan kissed the inside of the older man's knee. Another slight movement, and he kissed the inside of Qui-Gon's other knee. Qui-Gon opened his eyes and looked up at Obi-Wan, and fell in love with him all over again. And all at once the pain seemed to fade, the burning sensation subsided, and all that was left was the fullness of having Obi-Wan buried deep within his body.
"I'm ready," Qui-Gon said.
"You sure?"
"Yes." Qui-Gon reached down and began to stroke his now flaccid cock.
Obi-Wan pulled slowly out of Qui-Gon's body, almost all the way, and then pushed back in. The burning sensation flared, but quickly faded, and Qui-Gon's shaft began to take a renewed interest. Obi-Wan pulled almost all the way out again, and slid back in, a little harder this time, and the only thing Qui-Gon felt was good. And he wanted more.
"Sweet Force!" Obi-Wan gasped, "I never dreamed . . ." He moved in and out, slowly at first, still watching Qui-Gon. "So . . . so good, Qui-Gon!"
And Force help him, it was good. Obi-Wan began to quicken his pace, which made his thrusts harder, and his strokes shorter. And then he shifted, just a touch, but it was enough. He found Qui-Gon's prostate with his next thrust, and it was Qui-Gon's turn to gasp.
"Again!" Qui-Gon demanded. "Harder!"
Obi-Wan was thrusting in and out of Qui-Gon, harder and faster, and Qui-Gon matched his rhythm with his fist around his cock. Qui-Gon was getting close, so close, and it was marvelous. The most wonderful torture imaginable. "Yes," he groaned loudly. "Force, yes!"
Obi-Wan was grunting with each thrust into Qui-Gon's body, and Qui-Gon grunted each time the younger man slammed into him, and the room was filled with the sounds of their bodies slapping together, their grunts being forced from their throats and their breaths becoming ragged and harsh.
Qui-Gon tried to keep his eyes open as long as he could, because he wanted to remember every thing about Obi-Wan. The way the cords stood out on his neck, the way the blush of passion spread over his chest and up his neck, the way the sweat ran down the sides of his face with his exertion. He was exquisite. He was so exquisite. And he belonged to Qui-Gon!
Obi-Wan made that sound again, as if his very soul was being ripped from deep inside of his body, and Qui-Gon was lost. He squeezed his cock harder, faster, and Obi-Wan was there, right there with Qui-Gon, and it was so good, and that sound, oh Force, that sound Obi-Wan made and then it was enough, and Qui-Gon cried out, and it was Obi-Wan's name that spilled from his lips even as his seed began to spurt from his shaft. And Obi-Wan followed Qui-Gon, right to the edge and over, and when the younger man's knees and arms gave out, Qui-Gon was there to catch him, because he would always be there to catch the other half of his soul. And they held each other tightly, and nothing, nothing could have prepared Qui-Gon for the experience of making love to his Obi-Wan for the very first time. -[. . .]-
[[And now he lies sleeping in my bed. My bed. My Padawan is now my lover, and my lover lies sleeping in my bed. While I sit here on the cold floor talking into a recording device. As yet I haven't had the privilege of learning what if feels like to fall asleep with my lover in my arms. It is time to rectify that.]]
Qui-Gon returned to the present, a distant look in his eyes. It was hard to imagine he and Obi-Wan had been lovers for fifty years, but it was true. According to his digilog, tomorrow would be fifty years to the day since that most wondrous of nights when he'd given Obi-Wan not only his body, but his heart and soul as well.
A mug of tea, now gone cold, sat forgotten in the grass next to Qui-Gon. He was so glad Obi-Wan would be coming home tomorrow. This should be the last time the younger man would be called away for awhile, or so the Council promised. Qui-Gon thought it was a good thing Obi-Wan had officially "retired from active duty" with the Order some ten years ago, or he might never be able to spend any time with his mate.
He knew he shouldn't complain though. The Order had been good to both of them over the years, and if the Council needed Obi-Wan to come back to Coruscant now and again, who was Qui-Gon to say them nay? He certainly never minded when he was the one being called back. Ah, but that was the problem, of course. Qui-Gon wasn't the one being called back. Hadn't been, in fact, for some ten or twelve years now. And Qui-Gon didn't need to spend any time on his knees to figure that one out.
Some days he felt even older than his one hundred and five years. Days like today, when he was alone, again, and had been for several tens. When his lover was still active with the Jedi, despite his "retirement" some ten years before. When it was an effort to get on his knees to meditate, and even more of an effort to rise again afterwards.
Only with Obi-Wan by his side was Qui-Gon able to forget that he was more than a century old. Obi-Wan made him feel young. Always had. Obi-Wan made him feel needed and loved. Cherished. With Obi-Wan, Qui-Gon felt valued and valued life. Alone he felt old, worn out and empty. He hated those feelings. Knew they were unbecoming a Jedi, and he did his best to release them into the Force whenever he felt them beginning to take over.
He had a good life, with much to be thankful for. It was important for him to focus on that and not allow himself to dwell on things he had no control over. He reminded himself that Obi-Wan would be home soon. And that alone was enough to lift his spirits again.
Anniversaries, as a rule, were not something either of them thought much of. Living the type of lives they lived, being sent on one mission or another and only occasionally partnered together, it was hard enough to find the time to celebrate each other's name day. Especially in the early years, when both of them were in constant demand. Even when the time between missions grew longer, and they actually had more time together, they didn't observe it in any special way.
Other than their tenth anniversary, they had celebrated only one other time. On their twenty-fifth anniversary, Obi-Wan took it upon imself to request some downtime and had arranged a very special three day trip for the two of them. It was a simple matter to allow Qui-Gon to believe they were being sent to Goordon on a regular mission. It wasn't until Obi-Wan led him into the cabin they were supposedly being billeted in during their stay that Qui-Gon realized this was no ordinary assignment. Obi-Wan had gone to great lengths to make their stay as special as possible.
After three days with Obi-Wan, in what could only be considered paradise, Qui-Gon knew he'd found the place he wanted to retire to. With Obi-Wan in total agreement, Qui-Gon made arrangements with the Temple to purchase the cabin if it were to ever come available. Two years later, the Temple on Coruscant became the owners of the cabin and surrounding property, including the lake Qui-Gon was currently sitting next to.
The Order takes care of its own, and along with a decent monthly stipend for the retired Jedi, they were given the cabin in which to live out the remainder of their lives. The purchase agreement between the Coruscant Temple and the Goordon rulers specified that a Jedi would hold a permanent position overseeing the Goordon government. Qui-Gon, after long heated discussions with the Council, officially retired from active duty the same year the cabin was purchased, and had, until ten years ago, fulfilled the role of administrator for the planet.
His duties had been fairly easy, compared to his life as a Jedi Master. He made the two hour trip into the capitol city of Phopah by land speeder once or twice per sevenday. Once there, he would go over the reports presented to him by the various managing departments, iron out any major differences of opinion, and help guide the burgeoning government in the direction necessary for the good of all those living on the planet. Four or five hours after arriving, he would be on his way back to the cabin.
The rest of his free time he spent in the neighboring townships, teaching a variety of classes to the youngest of the villagers. It was a life he loved.
Obi-Wan spent as much time as his duties allowed with Qui-Gon, though in the beginning it was not nearly as often as either of them would have liked. It was, however, the life they had chosen willingly, and no matter how much they might miss each other while apart, they were fiercely dedicated to the Order, and never would have considered doing anything else. Instead, they made the most of whatever time together they were allowed.
After Obi-Wan's retirement from active duty, and by mutual agreement, Obi-Wan began to take over Qui-Gon's duties with the Goordon government. Before long, Obi-Wan was teaching many of the classes Qui-Gon had had to give up. And it was Obi-Wan who, more often than not, was the one being called back to Coruscant for consultations with the Council.
It wasn't that Qui-Gon was jealous of Obi-Wan. Not at all. He was thrilled to have Obi-Wan home most of the time. He was glad to know Obi-Wan was finding his work with the Goordon government just as fulfilling as Qui-Gon had. And he loved watching Obi-Wan teach, for the younger man seemed to enjoy it every bit as much as Qui-Gon did. No, he wasn't jealous of Obi-Wan. He just didn't like the way his body was betraying him. He didn't like growing old.
He forced his thoughts back to Obi-Wan. More specifically, to Obi-Wan's homecoming tomorrow on their fiftieth anniversary of being lovers. He had more than enough time to prepare something special, to surprise his lover and lifemate. Fifty years was something certainly worth celebrating.
By now the sun was coming up, and deciding he'd sat around doing nothing long enough, Qui-Gon slowly rose to his feet. He winced as muscles held too long in one place complained and old bones creaked loudly. If Obi-Wan were here, he would fuss at Qui-Gon for sitting too long outside in the damp morning air. Of course if Obi-Wan were here, Qui-Gon wouldn't have felt the need to sit for hours in the damp morning air. He would have been perfectly content to lie in bed holding Obi-Wan as he slept. And perhaps wondering if the two of them would be up to a little love-making when Obi-Wan awoke.
He smiled at the thought as he headed back toward the cabin. It wasn't that long ago when he didn't have to wonder whether or not they would make love in the mornings. If they were together, and had the time, making love in the morning was almost a given. Qui-Gon missed those days.
They still made love, just not as often as before. When they were younger.
Qui-Gon shook his head, determined to get past feeling pitiful about his age. He was very fortunate, compared to many humanoid species. Including Obi-Wan's, for that matter. Though thirty-five years separated them, their bodies were much closer in age. If he were of the same species as Obi-Wan, he would be lucky if he were still alive, much less able to live on his own and take care of himself.
After a quick look through their stored dry goods, Qui-Gon grabbed his well-worn poncho, threw a bag over his shoulder and headed for the small village a few miles from their cabin. His mind on the preparations needed for his surprise celebration, he barely noticed the aches and pains that usually accompanied him whenever he walked more than a short distance. He felt good, in fact. Better than he had in a long time. He felt young and vibrant, and anyone seeing him as he made his way through the village shops would be hard pressed to believe he was as old as he was.
The villagers knew him well, and many went out of their way to visit with the old Jedi. He'd become a valued member of their community over the years, having spent many hours with them. He'd taught them much about the world beyond their own, and they, in turn, had helped him learn the ways of their world. The children especially were drawn to him, as he'd become their favorite story teller over the years.
It was late in the afternoon by the time he finished shopping and visiting with his many friends. The temperature dropped quickly as the sun went down, and Qui-Gon was glad he'd brought along his poncho to ward off the cool night air. His bag might have been with his many purchases, but his heart was light and his spirit content as he made his way slowly back to the cabin.
The next morning found him up long before the sun broke through the night sky. He had much to do before his love returned, and he wanted everything perfect. Not that Obi-Wan would care if it weren't. But it made Qui-Gon feel good to do this for his lifemate. He worked tirelessly through the morning, kneading dough for the homemade bread Obi-Wan enjoyed, filleting the fresh fish into thick steaks which were then wrapped in fat slomel leaves and left to marinate in the plant's juices. A variety of vegetables were scrubbed and peeled and set aside for later and a salad of mixed fruits was soon chilling in the cold unit. As a special surprise, Qui-Gon had parted with a goodly sum while in the village to purchase a handful of chagra beans that would be crushed and then simmered with fresh milk to make the thick cafa Obi-Wan so dearly loved.
Qui-Gon knew the moment Obi-Wan's ship came out of hyperspace, for suddenly their bond thrummed with life. Though always connected, their bond became muted the further apart they were, and hyperspace always made things worse. It was like a breath of fresh air to feel his lover's presence fully, to feel their connection solidify in his mind. He stood in the middle of the kitchen for a long moment, everything forgotten as he savored the strength of their bond. His Obi-Wan was almost home.
Although certain Obi-Wan would fuss at him for doing so, Qui-Gon decided to make the trek up to the landing site to meet Obi-Wan's ship. It would be worth both the "dressing-down" he would get from his lover and the pain in his knees and hips he would no doubt suffer on the morrow after making such a hike. Unlike the trip to the village yesterday, the landing site was located at the top of a hill several miles from the cabin, and with each passing year, it had become more difficult for Qui-Gon to navigate comfortably. But he could not sit by and wait. If the price for having Obi-Wan in his arms a few hours sooner was sore knees and aching hips, Qui-Gon felt it was a very small price to pay.
His only concession was not to finish the meal preparations before he left. This would give him nearly an hour to rest once he'd made it to the top of the hill. An hour to meditate, and with any luck, release some of his aches and pains into the Force. Besides, he and Obi-Wan worked well together, and it would be good to have his lover by his side, helping him ready the meal they would share in honor of their anniversary. With that thought in mind, Qui-Gon took a last look around the small cabin, and then headed towards the landing site.
When Qui-Gon reached the top of the hill, he was pleased to note the trip hadn't been nearly as tough on his joints as he'd feared. Through their bond he could feel Obi-Wan drawing closer, and it was like a soothing balm to his soul. Only when they were together did Qui-Gon feel complete, and the knowledge that he would soon be able to hold his lifemate in his arms made him giddy with excitement. He felt younger and more alive than he had in a long time.
Finding a soft patch of grass a short distance from the landing pad, Qui-Gon slipped to his knees. It would be good to spend some time in meditation, to give thanks to the Force for allowing him to know such happiness, and for once again bringing his Obi-Wan safely home to him.
An hour or so later, sensing the ship's nearness, Qui-Gon slowly opened his eyes. He immediately saw the tiny speck far off in the distance, that quickly grew larger as he watched. Obi-Wan easily brought the small craft in for a perfect landing, and only when the engines died did Qui-Gon get to his feet. A moment later, the ramp slid down and the hatch slid open, and from the shadows of the ship, a lone figure emerged.
"What are you doing here, you old fool!" Obi-Wan groused good naturedly as he strode down the ramp. "You should have waited for me at the cabin."
And then he was in Qui-Gon's arms, and whatever else he might have said was forgotten as his mouth was claimed in a fierce kiss. Almost of their own accord, his arms went about Qui-Gon's neck and he returned the kiss with equal fervor.
When finally the need for air forced them apart, they continued to hold each other tightly. They needed this time of closeness, as it allowed their bond to realign itself, and their souls to once again become one.
"Force, but I missed you," Qui-Gon murmured softly. Eyes closed, he allowed everything that was Obi-Wan to permeate his senses. Nothing else mattered but the man he held in his arms.
"It's good to be home," Obi-Wan said. "But you should have waited at the cabin for me."
Ignoring the comment for the second time, Qui-Gon stepped back and smiled at his lover. "You look tired, Obi-Wan. Are you well?"
"Well enough for an old man," Obi-Wan grinned. "And not too tired to take you to task for wearing yourself out before I've had a chance to."
Qui-Gon laughed out loud. "Oh, no worries there, Obi-Wan," he said, taking the other man's hand in his own. "I assure you you'll have your chance." He pulled Obi-Wan close for a quick kiss. "Let's go home, love. We'll worry about unloading the ship later."
Obi-Wan glanced at the ship behind him. "There's not much there of any importance anyway. Nothing that can't wait for tomorrow."
During their trip back, Obi-Wan spoke of his mission, shared temple gossip, and passed on greetings from their friends on Coruscant. It was a pleasant walk down to the cabin, and though Qui-Gon was beginning to grow weary, he still felt far better than he had in a long time. Since before Obi-Wan left the last time, anyway.
It was late afternoon when they reached the cabin, and both men were quite happy to see it. "Are you hungry," Qui-Gon asked, as they climbed the steps.
"I could eat something," Obi-Wan said. "Why don't you sit out here and I'll fix us a light meal."
"Or you could help me finish preparing the meal I planned for your homecoming."
The entered the cabin and Obi-Wan took a quick look around. "What have you been up to, old man?" he asked, grinning at Qui-Gon.
Qui-Gon chuckled and moved toward the kitchen. "Just a simple meal to celebrate fifty years with my lifemate."
There was silence for a moment, and then a surprised sound from Obi-Wan. "I didn't realize . . ." he began, and then laughed. "Well, so it has been!" He joined Qui-Gon in the kitchen. "I think at least another kiss is in order."
"You'll get no arguments from me," Qui-Gon said, turning around to face Obi-Wan.
Obi-Wan easily moved into the larger man's arms. "I do love you, Qui-Gon Jinn," he said, gazing up into Qui-Gon's eyes. "Even if you are an old fool for doing all of this and making the trip up to meet my ship."
"I'm fine, Obi-Wan." Qui-Gon soothed softly. "I'm here now, and you're here now, and kissing you sounds far more enjoyable then debating what I should and shouldn't be doing."
"As always, the Master is right," Obi-Wan said with a smile. He leaned up, closed his eyes, and offered his mouth to Qui-Gon.
Their kiss was much slower, much softer, than the one they'd shared earlier. Lips opened and tongues moved languidly back and forth, as both men allowed all of their love for one another to flow through the bond they shared.
Qui-Gon moaned softly as his heart and soul was filled with Obi-Wan's love. Even after all this time, it never failed to take him aback each time he felt the intensity of his lifemate's love. And he never failed to let Obi-Wan know, through their bond or in words, how humbled he felt at being given such a gift.
It was Obi-Wan who pulled back first. He opened his eyes and smiled up at Qui-Gon. "I missed you, old man. And I'm going to make love to you all night long tonight."
Qui-Gon grinned. "Nothing would please me more than to spend the night making love with you, Obi-Wan."
"Then I suppose we should eat something, to keep up our strength, don't you think?"
"There's a bit of a problem with that," Qui-Gon said, trying, and failing to sound serious.
"And what would that problem be, my Master?"
"I'm not sure I can let you go long enough to finish preparing the food."
Obi-Wan chuckled. "Well, that could certainly be a problem. And what do you suggest we do about that?" He shifted his hips slightly, making sure Qui-Gon could feel his half-hard erection between them. "Of course I have some ideas . . ."
Grinning happily, Qui-Gon leaned down and planted a kiss on the tip of Obi-Wan's nose. "As irrepressible as ever, aren't you? I thought a man of your advanced age would be long past such things."
"May I never grow so old as to not be affected by just being near you," Obi-Wan said, growing serious. "For what then would be the purpose in continuing to draw breath?"
Qui-Gon swallowed the large lump that formed in his throat at Obi-Wan's words. "I don't know what I did to deserve being loved by one such as you, Obi-Wan. And while I've long since given up questioning the gift of your heart, I shall, until I draw my final breath, be exceedingly grateful for it."
"Such a romantic man I'm bonded to," Obi-Wan smiled softly.
Qui-Gon chuckled and let his arms slip from around Obi-Wan. "A few minutes and I'll have the fish in the oven, and then perhaps a walk to the lake while it cooks?"
"Only if you let me help you," Obi-Wan said.
They set to work, moving easily around each other, and before long the bread and fish were baking in the oven, the vegetables were simmering over a low flame and the wine was being chilled.
They walked outside and stood on the porch. "About that walk?" Qui-Gon asked.
Obi-Wan turned to look at his companion. "A walk with you is always nice, Qui-Gon. But I think I'd rather sit here with you on the porch, and watch the sun set."
"I thought you might be interested in seeing how much the gendagra nestlings had grown since you last saw them," Qui-Gon said.
Obi-Wan shrugged his shoulders. "They'll be there tomorrow, I suspect."
Qui-Gon sighed. "I know what you are up to, Obi-Wan, and while I appreciate your concern, I promise it's not necessary. I told you, I'm fine."
"Is it wrong of me to want you that way all of the time?"
"Obi-Wan . . ." Qui-Gon began, but Obi-Wan interrupted him.
"You walked to the village and back yesterday, and today it was up to the landing site and back. I know how much your hips have been bothering you lately, and it's only exacerbated by spending too much time on your feet. With all the walking you've done of late, I'm surprised you aren't in agony. I appreciate everything you've done for me, Qui-Gon, I truly do. But if it causes you pain to do so, even if that pain doesn't come until the next day, then it causes me pain as well."
Qui-Gon looked away, his emotions warring between embarrassment and anger. "Would you have me in a hoverchair now?" he asked, a bit more sharply then he'd intended.
"You know that's not what I want," Obi-Wan said. This was a subject they'd been dancing around for the past year or so, and Obi-Wan seemed to be finding it more a more difficult to remain patient in the face of Qui-Gon's attitude regarding his age. "I just want you to feel as good as possible, as much of the time as possible.
"I don't recall complaining to you of my infirmities recently," Qui-Gon said, sarcastically. "But in the future I shall do my best to be even more vigilant when it comes to my aches and pains."
Obi-Wan bit back the sharp retort that weighed heavily on his tongue. "How am I supposed to feel, when tomorrow morning, just getting out of bed will cause you pain? Knowing that I am the cause of that pain? What am I supposed to do? Can't very well expect you to want to make love, and even if you said you wanted to, I wouldn't because I'd know you were in pain. And later on, if I wanted to spend some time working in the garden, I'd feel guilty, knowing you would want to come and it would pain you to do so, so I wouldn't even suggest it. And because I want to be near you, to spend time with you after being away so long, we'd end up sitting around here, playing sabbac or some other boring board game. And all the while we would both know why I was doing it, but neither of us would broach the subject."
"Since when have I ever asked you to sit with me instead of doing whatever it is you would rather be doing?"
Obi-Wan released an exasperated sigh. "Damn your hard-headedness, Qui-Gon Jinn. You are one hundred and five years old, for Force sake, and you can't do the same things you did fifty years ago. And no, you thickheaded son of a frozen Hoth-whore, you have never asked me to stay with you. I would do it because I love you, though sometimes I wonder why. Because I want to be around you, no matter the circumstances. Why do you insist on making this so difficult?"
Qui-Gon was angry, but understood it was not Obi-Wan he was angry with. Past experience told him Obi-Wan knew this as well. That didn't make things any better, nor did it make it any easier for Qui-Gon to accept his limitations gracefully. He didn't want to argue with Obi-Wan, didn't want to hurt the man he loved with every fiber of his being, but there were times when his frustration at his advancing age became almost too much to bear. When that happened, the only thing to do was put some distance between him and Obi-Wan, until he was better able to manage his temper.
"Perhaps you should walk down to the lake on your own this evening," Qui-Gon said, the anger evident in his voice. "I'll sit here and wait for you to come back."
Obi-Wan stared at Qui-Gon a long moment, and then with a brief nod, turned and walked away.
Qui-Gon watched as Obi-Wan slowly walked towards the lake. He could tell by the slump of Obi-Wan's shoulders he'd once again hurt his lifemate. This was certainly not the way he'd planned on spending their first night together after being apart for so long. But he was still too angry to do very much about it, save continue to sulk and feel sorry for himself. He needed some time to process his feelings, and then to release them to the Force. He knew Obi-Wan understood, which was why the younger man had so easily been convinced to take the walk down to the lake alone. With a tired sigh, Qui-Gon sat down on a wooden chair and closed his eyes. He hated feeling sorry for himself, knew it was unhealthy and counterproductive, yet there were times when he felt nearly incapable of feeling anything else.
He needed to force himself to focus on what he was able to still do, as opposed to what he could no longer do. But most of all, he needed to finally admit to himself what was at the root of his anger. And that was his intense fear that Obi-Wan would begin to feel resentment at attaching himself, all those many years ago, to a man who was 35 years his senior.
Intellectually Qui-Gon knew his fears were groundless. Obi-Wan had never been the kind of person that wasted even a moment considering such things. And if Qui-Gon truly had any doubts, all he had to do was concentrate on their bond to feel the enormous love Obi-Wan had for him. It frustrated Qui-Gon to know that at this point in his life he was being plagued by these feelings. He'd spent his entire life learning how to find serenity in the midst of chaos, find peace in the midst of turmoil. He was a man famous for his connection with the Living Force, who was suddenly finding it more and more difficult to live in the moment. To trust in the Force to continue to guide him, as it had done perfectly for so many years.
He sighed again and rubbed his eyes, feeling the beginnings of a headache trying to take hold. He knew what he needed to do, and putting it off would only make things worse. He needed to do some serious meditation on his attitude, and he needed to do it quickly. Obi-Wan deserved so much better than to spend his fiftieth anniversary with a lifemate as pathetic and self-pitying as Qui-Gon had been.
Obi-Wan would be back about the time their meal would be ready, which gave Qui-Gon about two-thirds of an hour to meditate. More than enough time to address the reason for his anger, face it honestly, see it for what it was, and then release it into the Force. More than enough time to find his center, his serenity and whatever common sense he had left. With a mental nod to Obi-Wan, Qui-Gon leaned forward, put his elbows on his knees, and his head in his hands. He would rather have gone to his knees, in classic meditation position, but this would have to do. He closed his eyes and easily slid into a deep meditation, his only goal to make things better for his Obi-Wan.
It was a much calmer Qui-Gon who watched the love of his life make his way slowly from the lake. He liked watching Obi-Wan walk, always had, in fact. Even at seventy years of age, he moved with a kind of sensual grace that still turned heads, both male and female, both young and old. And the floor-length tunic he'd taken to wearing only accentuated his sexy gait. Obi-Wan had aged very nicely, Qui-Gon thought. He wore his nearly white hair close cropped, and sported a trim, neat beard and mustache. Qui-Gon thought it made him look rather elegant and quite dignified.
"Feeling better?" Obi-Wan asked as he reached the porch. Even his accent had become more cultured over the years.
"Yes," Qui-Gon answered, rising to his feet. "And I must ask your forgiveness for my self-pitying attitude."
Obi-Wan climbed the steps and stood in front of Qui-Gon. "No need to apologize, love, for there's no harm done."
"I've been acting like a fool, again, Obi-Wan. I let my pride blind me to what is most important in my life, and I hurt you. I'm sorry."
Obi-Wan leaned up and pressed a soft kiss to Qui-Gon's mouth. "I love you, Qui-Gon Jinn," he said, softly. "I've loved you for most of my life, and I know you better than you know yourself."
"Obi-Wan . . . ," Qui-Gon started, but Obi-Wan gently shushed him.
"You've apologized, my Master, and I accept your apology. Can we not just get on with the business of being together?"
Qui-Gon smiled down at his lover. "Such a wise man I'm bonded to."
"And a hungry man," Obi-Wan laughed, pressing another quick kiss to Qui-Gon's lips. "And once we've eaten the meal you've prepared for us, I have a feeling I'll have quite an appetite of a different kind."
It was Qui-Gon's turn to laugh out loud. "Of that I have no doubt, Obi-Wan. You've always had a rather voracious appetite when it comes to that."
"I never got any complaints from my lover," Obi-Wan grinned.
"That's because your lover was quite happy to do his best to satiate that incredible appetite of yours."
"My lover has always done a fine job of doing just that," Obi-Wan practically purred. "And I'm certain tonight will be no different."
Deciding the sunset was too beautiful to waste, they ate their meal at the small wooden table on the porch. Along with the food, they shared an easy camaraderie born of many loving years together.
"All of my favorites," Obi-Wan said, happily. "You spoil me, Qui-Gon."
"Whenever I can, my love, though that's never often enough."
Finished with his meal, Obi-Wan leaned back in the chair. "Fifty years," he chuckled. "Almost doesn't seem possible."
"Any regrets?"
"Not a one," Obi-Wan answered immediately. "Other than not enough time with my lover."
"That would be my only one, as well. Never enough time with you, my love."
Obi-Wan rose from his seat and walked around the table to stand behind Qui-Gon's side. He slipped his arms around Qui-Gon's neck, and leaned down to whisper in his ear. "We're together now, my Master," he said, his voice soft and husky. "I'd like to put our time together to good use."
Qui-Gon leaned back into Obi-Wan's embrace. "Why don't you go and get ready, while I clean up here?" he asked, feeling his pulse quicken at Obi-Wan's closeness.
"Why don't we leave the clean up for tomorrow," Obi-Wan whispered suggestively, his lips brushing Qui-Gon's ear.
Qui-Gon closed his eyes and shivered slightly. It never ceased to amaze him how quickly his body responded to Obi-Wan. Even after all this time. Especially after all this time. "I definitely like your suggestion better," he said, reaching up to caress Obi-Wan's cheek.
Obi-Wan turned his head and kissed Qui-Gon's palm, causing the other man to shiver again. "Let's go to bed, Qui-Gon," he said, as he straightened. "I'll race you to the fresher!"
Qui-Gon chuckled and stood up. "You go ahead. I like watching you walk away almost as much as I like watching you walk towards me."
"Dirty old man!" Obi-Wan laughed and turned away. Knowing Qui-Gon would indeed be watching, he exaggerated the sway of his already too sexy walk.
Qui-Gon followed the younger man back into the cabin and down the hall. When Obi-Wan turned into the fresher, Qui-Gon kept going into their bedroom and readied the bed. He heard the sonic shower, and grinned to himself, knowing Obi-Wan had opted for sonic instead of water because it was quicker.
A few minutes later, Obi-Wan sauntered into their bedroom wearing just a towel. "Your turn, lover," he said, sliding his hand over Qui-Gon's chest as he walked past him. "But don't take too long!"
He didn't take very long at all.
When he entered their bedroom a short time later, also clad only in a towel, the sight that greeted him nearly caused him to stop breathing. His Obi-Wan was on their bed, his towel on the floor, and he was lazily sliding his fist up and down a rather impressive erection. Qui-Gon swallowed, suddenly dry-mouthed, and wondered if he would feel much pain from the heart attack he was surely about to suffer.
"Come and make love to me Qui-Gon. It's been far too long since I've had you buried inside of me."
Somehow Qui-Gon managed to make his legs move forward, and he supposed he was the one who pulled off his towel, because it was no longer wrapped around his waist when he reached the bed.
"Force, Qui-Gon, I've missed you," Obi-Wan said, his eyes roaming slowly up and down Qui-Gon's body. "I've missed looking at you. I've missed being with you. I've missed kissing you. And sweet Force, but I've missed being taken by you."
Qui-Gon stood at the side of the bed and stared down at Obi-Wan, and at the hungry expression on the younger man's face. Through their bond Qui-Gon could feel the strength of Obi-Wan's desire, and he nearly staggered under the weight of it. And he was achingly hard, but had no memory of becoming that way.
Obi-Wan licked his lips as he stared at Qui-Gon's shaft. "Come here, lover," he growled hungrily. "Or you'll have to stand there while I suck your cock, and I'm not sure your knees could take it." He moved over and patted the bed next to him.
"Obi-Wan," Qui-Gon groaned, as he moved onto the bed. "You will surely kill me this night."
Obi-Wan laughed as he rose up on one elbow. "I shall do my best, my Master," he said, practically leering at the older man. "I shall surely do my best!" He moved into Qui-Gon's arms and leaned in for a kiss. "I want you," he mumbled against the older man's lips.
Qui-Gon wrapped his arms around his lover and opened his mouth, an invitation he knew Obi-Wan could not refuse, and was rewarded by suddenly having a mouthful of Obi-Wan's tongue. As with everything Obi-Wan had ever done, he was a passionate lover. He kissed Qui-Gon with just as much ardor as he'd done the very first time they'd made love. Qui-Gon held on tightly, trying to give back as good as he was getting, but knew, when it was all said and done, he was merely along for the ride. Obi-Wan was the aggressor when it came to their physical relationship, had been almost from the very beginning. And much to Qui-Gon's surprise, it had been exactly what he needed, what he'd wanted from his lover.
Obi-Wan rolled on top of Qui-Gon, but even in his passion, was careful not to rest all of his weight on the older man. Knees straddling Qui-Gon's hips and resting on his elbows, Obi-Wan was in the perfect position to take full advantage of the man lying under him. Which is exactly what he did. He kissed Qui-Gon until they were nearly breathless, and then began to kiss and lick his way over as much of Qui-Gon's face as he could easily reach.
"Missed you, Master," Obi-Wan murmured as he slid his lips over Qui-Gon's cheek. "Missed your taste." He licked at Qui-Gon's ear. "Missed your smell." He buried his nose in Qui-Gon's hair and inhaled deeply. "Love your hair," he groaned softly. "Have always loved your hair."
"Obi-Wan," Qui-Gon groaned, but anything else he might have said was suddenly sucked from his mind as licked the inside of his ear.
"Missed those sounds, lover," Obi-Wan whispered into Qui-Gon's ear, sending chills down the older man's spine. "I want to hear you, Qui-Gon." He softly nibbled at Qui-Gon's earlobe. "I need to hear your pleasure."
Obi-Wan's voice, so deep and husky, seemed to flow over Qui-Gon in thick silky waves, sending electrical shocks through his body and straight to his groin. Once, many years ago, Qui-Gon had come just from Obi-Wan talking about what he wanted to do to his Master.
"I want you, Qui-Gon." His lips were at Qui-Gon's throat, his hands in Qui-Gon's hair as he held the elder man. "I want to suck your cock till you scream, and then I want you to shove it into me. Over and over, hard and fast!"
Qui-Gon made a strangled sound, a sound that would have been an amused chuckle if Obi-Wan hadn't picked that very moment to latch on to Qui-Gon's nipple with his hot, talented mouth. "You forget I'm a very old man," Qui-Gon managed to choke out.
Obi-Wan was busily sucking and licking both of Qui-Gon's nipples, moving back and forth from one to the other. He paused long enough to look up into Qui-Gon's face. He smiled, a slow, dangerous smile. "You forget, old man, that I always get what I want!" Not waiting for Qui-Gon's response, he went back to his self-appointed task of anointing as much of Qui-Gon's body with his tongue and lips as possible without driving the older man completely insane.
"Force help me," Qui-Gon moaned. "You are intent on killing me tonight."
Obi-Wan's chuckle was muffled as he moved lower. He traced Qui-Gon's rib cage with his tongue, kissed a trail of fire down the middle of Qui-Gon's chest, and left a large passion mark on the left side of Qui-Gon's abdomen. With experience born of years of practice, he knew just how to keep Qui-Gon's lower body movements to a minimum so as not to cause his mate any undue pain in his hips.
But Obi-Wan was not a young man either, and Qui-Gon knew his lifemate couldn't remain crouched on his knees much longer. Obi-Wan had been using his thighs, in part, to hold Qui-Gon still beneath him, and even through his fog of pleasure, Qui-Gon could sense Obi-Wan's growing discomfort in his hips and knees.
"Obi-Wan," Qui-Gon ground out between clenched teeth. He reached down and gently tugged at Obi-Wan's head. "Stop . . . come here to me."
And surprisingly, Obi-Wan did not argue, but merely moved up his Master's body, till he could once again claim Qui-Gon's lips with his own. "Love you, old man," he murmured huskily.
Qui-Gon slipped his arms around Obi-Wan and held him close as their mouths met in a kiss that spoke volumes. Love and desire, respect and trust, friendship and admiration. Their bond pulsed with life and the Force sang with the rightness of their union. As it always had. As it always would. Each time they came together, the Force was there, strong and beautiful, filling their hearts and minds and souls with its light.
With a soft moan, Obi-Wan finally broke their kiss. He opened his eyes and looked down at Qui-Gon, a small smile on his lips. "So, why did you stop me?"
Qui-Gon gazed up at Obi-Wan, for a moment all else forgotten save the man he held in his arms. It took him a minute to process what Obi-Wan just said, and then he grinned as he remembered. "Because I want to share the pleasure with you," he answered. "Like we used to, when both of us could come more than once a night."
"I have a better idea," Obi-Wan whispered softly. "I've waited long enough to have you inside of me. I don't want to wait any longer."
Qui-Gon groaned as Obi-Wan's words fueled his arousal. "I like the way you think."
Obi-Wan moved away from Qui-Gon, and slid off the bed. With a grunt, Qui-Gon sat up, swung his legs over the side and stood up. There was a chair next to the small bedside table, and Obi-Wan stood waiting beside it. The armless chair was tall with a high back, and had proven quite useful as the two Jedi aged. Qui-Gon sat down and Obi-Wan straddled the older man's thighs, facing his Master. It was a comfortable position for both of them, and one that allowed for long, slow love-making.
Obi-Wan wrapped his arms around Qui-Gon's neck. "You get the oil," he said, his voice once again soft and deep. "I want to watch you put it on your cock."
Qui-Gon groaned and closed his eyes for a moment. "Even after all these years, you still have such power over me," he said huskily, reaching for the vial of oil on the table.
"Only the power you chose to give me, old man."
Qui-Gon, using only one hand, deftly unloosed the lid of the vial and upended it, allowing the thick, amber liquid to pool in his hand. He dropped the vial, unmindful of any mess it might make, his eyes glued to those of his lover as he reached between them and wrapped his hand around his turgid shaft. "Is this what you want, Obi-Wan?" he groaned deeply.
"More than I wish to breathe," Obi-Wan answered huskily. He stood up and slowly lowered himself, knowing Qui-Gon was holding his cock steady.
Qui-Gon groaned again, the sensation of having his lover impale himself on his erection was almost too much to bear. He bit his lip, hard enough to draw blood, in an effort not to surge up, to fully sheath himself in the tight heat of Obi-Wan's body. He grabbed Obi-Wan's hips and held on.
Obi-Wan hissed as Qui-Gon's cock breached his body. "Oh, Force!" he gasped, his eyes still locked with Qui-Gon's. "Force, yes!" And then it was done, his bottom pressed against Qui-Gon's thighs, and all of Qui-Gon's cock was inside of him.
"So good, Qui-Gon!" Obi-Wan moaned. "Missed this!"
"Kiss me," Qui-Gon growled hungrily. "I want to taste you, smell you, feel you!"
Obi-Wan leaned forward, his mouth opening wide and tongue sliding out even before their lips touched. And he began to move. Slowly at first, up and down, back and forth. Moans were greedily swallowed, as they drank from each other's mouths. It was good, like this, and both of them fed their pleasure to each other through their bond. Their passion spiraled up and out, coloring the air around with swirls of light and love.
In years past it would have been hard and fast, with Qui-Gon pounding into Obi-Wan, his cock battering Obi-Wan's prostate with each thrust, and when they achieved orgasm, it would be hard and loud. Age made that impossible, but neither man missed it, as their orgasms were still as intense as ever. As this one was.
With a sharp gasp, Obi-Wan broke their kiss and arched backwards. Cords stood out on his neck and arms and he began to shudder. Qui-Gon groaned loudly as he desperately tried to keep his eyes open. He wanted to watch Obi-Wan come, see the waves of pleasure wash over his face, but he couldn't do it. He felt the hot splash of Obi-Wan's seed on his stomach, and with a final groan, he followed his lover over the edge.
Obi-Wan sagged against Qui-Gon, resting his head on the older man's shoulder. They simply held each other, both gasping for breath as their hearts raced. "I love you, Obi-Wan," Qui-Gon whispered, pressing his lips to Obi-Wan's brow.
"With all that I am, my Master," Obi-Wan answered.
Eventually they separated, but just long enough to clean up the remnants of their lovemaking and get in their bed. There they easily moved into each other's arms and for the first time since Obi-Wan left him, Qui-Gon slept soundly, not even waking when the sun broke the nighttime sky.
It was mid-morning before Qui-Gon finally awoke, feeling better than he had in a long time. He and Obi-Wan were lying face to face, wrapped in each other's arms, their bodies aligned so that their hearts were pressed together, beating as one. Obi-Wan was still asleep, and Qui-Gon was perfectly happy to stay where he was and hold his lifemate close.
That is until he realized he had a morning erection. As did Obi-Wan. The Force was certainly being generous, Qui-Gon thought with a grin, and since he'd never been one to turn down a gift from the Force, he decided to take full advantage of the situation. Carefully extricating one arm from around Obi-Wan, Qui-Gon, used the Force to call the open vial of oil they'd used last night to his hand. Though some of the thick liquid had spilled when he'd carelessly dropped it to the floor last night, more than enough remained for his needs. He stuck his index finger into the neck of the vial and turned it upside down, allowing the oil to coat his finger and run down into his palm. Removing his finger, he once again tossed the vial to the floor.
Reaching behind him, he easily found what he was looking for, and with a soft sigh, pushed his well-oiled finger past the tight ring of muscles and into his body. He felt Obi-Wan stir in his sleep, and knew his lover was feeling Qui-Gon's arousal through their bond. He moved his finger in and out of his body several times, just enough to slick his passage, and then he was more than ready to accept Obi-Wan into his body.
He could feel Obi-Wan's hot erection pressed between their stomachs, could feel it twitch with interest as more and more of Qui-Gon's arousal seeped through their bond. Obi-Wan moaned softly in his sleep, and pressed himself closer to Qui-Gon. He was dreaming, and while Qui-Gon would never intrude so much as to actually observe Obi-Wan's dream, he knew it was of an erotic nature. Brought on by Qui-Gon's own arousal, no doubt.
Moving slowly, Qui-Gon managed to slip his hand between their bodies and lightly grasped Obi-Wan's shaft. Another moan, this one a bit louder, a bit deeper, as Obi-Wan pushed up into Qui-Gon's palm. After a moment, Qui-Gon very carefully turned over, so that he was facing away from Obi-Wan. Even in sleep, Obi-Wan immediately moved closer to Qui-Gon, wrapping his body around that of the older man, pressing close, ensuring as much of their bodies came into contact as possible.
Qui-Gon reached back and slid his hand down Obi-Wan's flank, enjoying the feel of hard muscle covered by warm, silky skin. He closed his eyes and pictured his hand moving slowly up and down Obi-Wan's thigh, and his shaft, which had waned slightly in the interim, was once again fully aroused.
Behind him, Obi-Wan was beginning awaken. Qui-Gon could sense the remnants of Obi-Wan's dream slipping away, but could definitely feel the results of it pressed against his lower back. Qui-Gon brought his leg up and rested it on a pillow, and Obi-Wan, still more asleep than awake, shifted his hips forward, as he tried to mold his body to that of his lover.
Qui-Gon did nothing to dampen his arousal, letting Obi-Wan feel the strength of his desire through their bond. Obi-Wan moaned and pushed his hips forward again, pressing his heated flesh into the crack of Qui-Gon's bottom. Qui-Gon gently rocked backward, his hand on Obi-Wan's thigh encouraging Obi-Wan to press forward, and with the help of the oil Qui-Gon had used earlier, their rocking motions allowed Obi-Wan's erection to finally slip down and slide against Qui-Gon's perineum.
A ragged gasp followed by a throaty chuckle from behind him, told Qui-Gon that Obi-Wan was now fully awake.
"Oh, this is nice," Obi-Wan murmured huskily as he slowly pumped his hips back and forth. "I like this!"
"Want you," Qui-Gon groaned softly, as he stilled Obi-Wan's movements with his hand. He released Obi-Wan's hip and grasped the back of his own thigh, holding himself open further. He felt Obi-Wan's hand slide between them, felt Obi-Wan's finger at the entrance to his body, and then felt his lover shudder at the realization that Qui-Gon had already prepared himself. Had already prepared both of them.
"Oh Force, Qui-Gon!" Obi-Wan exhaled harshly. "If I come even before I get my cock inside you, it will be your own fault!"
And then Qui-Gon felt the head of Obi-Wan's shaft pressing against the entrance to his body, heard Obi-Wan's grunt of effort as he pushed past the first ring of muscle, sensed Obi-Wan's struggle to force himself to go slower, and not shove himself hard into his Master's body.
"Oh, Force!" Obi-Wan panted raggedly, as he slid the rest of the way in. "So good!"
Qui-Gon groaned deeply, the sound coming from somewhere deep in his belly. He felt Obi-Wan shudder behind him and knew the younger man was trying not to move, trying to give Qui-Gon time to adjust to his girth, trying to make sure he was not hurting Qui-Gon.
But Qui-Gon didn't want Obi-Wan to take him carefully. Didn't want the younger man to worry about old hips or sore knees. He wanted to feel Obi-Wan's passion in the strength of his strokes, see stars each time Obi-Wan shoved his cock into Qui-Gon's body. And he wanted this more than he'd wanted anything in a long, long time.
"Do it!" Qui-Gon growled. "Like you want to. Like you used to."
Obi-Wan groaned as his whole body shuddered. "No!" he gasped. "I'll hurt you!"
Qui-Gon could feel Obi-Wan's control slipping, as the younger man's body warred with his mind. Qui-Gon had to make it right. He had to make Obi-Wan understand that this was what they both needed. This was right. "Need this. Need you." His said, his voice breaking. "Please, Obi-Wan! Oh, Force, please!"
Obi-Wan cried out harshly, almost as if in agony, yet he finally began to move. He slowly pulled out of Qui-Gon's body, almost all of the way, and then once again paused. "Love you, Master!" he ground out between clenched teeth.
Qui-Gon flooded their bond with his love and desire for his lifemate. "Now!" he pleaded. "I'm ready for you." And with a click that was almost audible, he could feel Obi-Wan's sudden understanding of the gift they'd been given this morning.
"Yes!" Obi-Wan hissed as he grabbed Qui-Gon's waist and thrust forward. "Oh, Force, yes!"
Qui-Gon gasped as Obi-Wan's hard cock made contact with his prostate. "Again!" he moaned.
And Obi-Wan did. Again and again he pulled himself almost all the way out and then shoved back into Qui-Gon's willing body. Over and over. Faster and harder. And the sounds of their pleasure filled the small room. Obi-Wan held onto Qui-Gon's waist, used it as leverage in order to deepen his strokes. It was the perfect angle and Qui-Gon cried out each time Obi-Wan's shaft slammed against his sweet spot.
The pleasure was excruciating in its intensity, and nothing that good could last for long. Qui-Gon was the first to fall from that high cliff, Obi-Wan's name spilling from his lips even as his seed began to spill from his shaft. Behind him, Obi-Wan bucked and thrust into his Master's body, his voice hoarse from use and with a final, ragged cry, he followed Qui-Gon over the edge.
When Qui-Gon next awoke a short time later, he knew immediately he was alone. Not only did he miss the warmth of Obi-Wan wrapped around him from behind, but he could feel the younger man's energy through their bond, and knew Obi-Wan was exercising. For a long moment, Qui-Gon lay where he was, basking in the nearness of his lifemate. He felt at peace, his soul content, his heart filled with a quiet joy. Eventually, however, he could no longer ignore his insistent bladder. He rose from the bed, his hips and knees complaining loudly, and made his way into the fresher.
He was sore, but not in agony, thank the Force. Under normal circumstances, after the physical work-out he'd given his body over the past couple of days, Qui-Gon knew the pain would have been so great he doubted he would have even been able to leave his bed.
Still sticky from this morning's lovemaking, Qui-Gon allowed himself the luxury of a long, hot bath. A quick check through their bond, and Qui-Gon knew Obi-Wan was doing a series of meditation katas down by the lake. For a brief moment, Qui-Gon considered joining him, as it had been a long time since they'd done these particular katas together, and it was something they both truly enjoyed. With a wistful sigh, Qui-Gon leaned back into the large tub, knowing such thoughts were futile, as they only helped remind him of his age. He would not dwell on such things, he promised himself. Not today. Not with his lover just home from a mission that should have lasted no longer than a few tens, but had ended up lasting nearly three months. And especially not after his pathetic attitude from the day before.
Having made such a mess of things yesterday, Qui-Gon decided to make this day Obi-Wan's day. Which meant, Qui-Gon knew, acting his age and not wasting a moment feeling sorry for himself. It was the least he could do for the most important person in his life.
As he was drying himself off, Qui-Gon remembered the small bag of chagra beans he'd purchased at the village. In the excitement of having Obi-Wan home, he'd completely forgotten about them.
Through their bond, Qui-Gon knew Obi-Wan was making his way back from the lake, which gave him just enough time to prepare the chagra. He quickly donned his usual garb of old, comfortable leggings, and a well-worn, pullover tunic, ran a comb through his long hair to remove the worst of the tangles, and was soon happily grinding up the beans and warming the milk.
Carrying two large mugs of the steaming, thick cafa, he walked out onto the porch and sat down on the top step. His timing was perfect. Obi-Wan had just come into view, and Qui-Gon smiled as he watched his lover walk towards him.
"Good morning, old man," Obi-Wan grinned as he neared the porch. "I was beginning to think you'd gone into hibernation."
Qui-Gon chuckled and accepted the kiss Obi-Wan offered. "Haven't slept so well in ages," he said, as Obi-Wan sat down beside him. Qui-Gon handed over one of the mugs. "Here, this is for you."
"Thanks, love," Obi-Wan said, taking the mug from Qui-Gon. He was just about to take a drink, when the smell of the thick drink hit him full in the face. "Cafa?" he asked, his surprise and pleasure evident in his voice. "Master, do you know how long it's been since I've had this?"
"You're welcome, my Padawan," Qui-Gon smiled happily.
Obi-Wan closed his eyes and inhaled deeply. "Force, it smells so good," he sighed. He took a small sip and sighed again. "Perfect. Absolutely perfect." He looked over at Qui-Gon. "You are too good to me, old man."
Qui-Gon wrapped his arm around Obi-Wan's shoulder, and then leaned over and kissed the younger man's temple. "Making you happy is my greatest joy, Obi-Wan," he said softly.
Obi-Wan rested his hand on Qui-Gon's knee and leaned back, allowing his lifemate to hold him close. "I am happy, Qui-Gon."
They sat together, enjoying the fresh air, the cafa and each other's company for a good while. So much so, that they remained that way long after their mugs were empty.
Eventually, Obi-Wan stretched and stood up. "I think I'm going to go up to the landing pad and get my things," he told Qui-Gon. "And then when I get back, if you feel like it, maybe we can take our noon meal down by the lake."
Qui-Gon smiled up at his lifemate. "I look forward to it," he said softly.
Obi-Wan leaned down for a quick kiss, and then turned and walked away. Qui-Gon watched till he was out of sight, and then spent a few minutes gathering up the mugs and the dishes from their meal of the night before. He thought about getting a few things together to take to the lake, but decided he would rest a bit first. He was determined to take things easy, so as not to tire himself out. And, he discovered, it was much easier now that he'd gotten his priorities in order.
With a fresh cup of hot tea and his digilog, he settled himself comfortably on the porch to await Obi-Wan's return. [[It occurred to me this morning,]] he said into the digilog's microphone [[that I've wasted an enormous amount of time feeling sorry for myself of late. Life is too short, even if one is on the other side of a century in age.]] He talked for awhile, recording his memories of the past two days, and his thoughts and feelings overall.
When Obi-Wan returned, it was to find Qui-Gon napping, the digilog still running, recording the sound of his lover's soft snores.
End