Master Apprentice Archive Force Transcending Quick search:

Force Transcending

by obi-ki

Archive: MA, anyone else please ask.

Pairing: Qui-Gon/Obi-Wan

Catagory: Qui/Obi, Angst, Alternate Universe. POV

Rating: NC-17

Warnings: emotional angst, m/m sex.

Spoilers: Immediately post TPM so if anyone hasn't seen the movie by now... Qui-Gon survives.

Summary: Obi-Wan struggles coming to terms with the changes in his life after Naboo.

Disclaimers: Everything Star Wars belongs to George Lucas and Lucasfilms. I am just playing in his world, borrowing the boyz and their accomplices and will return them all when I'm through. No money is being made from this, it is all done for entertainment only.

Author's notes: This story has been almost a year in the making--what started as a short romantic piece ended up basically taking over my life. Massive Qui-Gon hugs to my marvelous beta/editor, Monalee. Without her constant support and her ability to check for consistency and characterization, repeatedly insert commas, correct grammar and always finding just the right word to get the thought across this would not have been written. Also thanks to Artemis and Sybil, for reading through 100 pages to check for flow and consistency. I couldn't have done it without them. As always, I can't resist making a few final tweaks, so all mistakes are mine. Hope you enjoy the story. *denotes mind speech*

Feedback: Please, it's the only way a writer knows what works. Onlist or off at kiowkqgj@yahoo.com

As Bant moved around the kitchen trying to put together a meal from the meager supplies in my cooler, I thought back over the last five tens since the day the unspeakable had almost happened. By using every trick I knew to pour healing energy into my injured Master, I had managed, just barely, to keep Qui-Gon alive long enough for the Naboo medics to reach him and transport him to the healing facility. Within less than an hour, Qui-Gon was nestled in a bacta tank, beginning the long and tedious process of healing from those near fatal wounds.

The process was slow and painstaking and for the first five days, I spent almost every minute by his side, sleeping in a chair near the bacta tank. The anguish of seeing him so severely injured was alleviated slightly by being able to remain close to him and observing his recovery first hand. Removal from the tank put Qui-Gon into a bed but I still stayed with him as much as I was allowed and continued sleeping in the chair. Another five days had him stable enough to be moved and the ship that had brought the healers to treat him, took him back to the Temple. Anakin and I accompanied him on that ship and in three more days we were back on Coruscant.

The healing Masters in Temple were not as accommodating as those sent to Naboo. I was no longer allowed to sleep in a chair by my unconscious Master's bed and the time they allowed me to spend in his room was stringently restricted. The anguish I felt at his injuries mutated into a physical ache at being separated from him. Even after he finally regained consciousness, I was only allowed to visit him for short periods at a time so as not to tire him out and set back his recovery. That was even worse somehow as now Qui-Gon knew I was there and was able to speak to me but before we could lose ourselves in the comfort of being together I was always forced to leave him.

The ache and anguish at being kept away from him spiraled within me until I had trouble thinking of anything else. I lectured myself at length over this failure and wondered what the Council would think if they knew their newly elected Knight was so reliant. As I berated myself for being so needy and childish, I tried to stem this dependence by focusing all my attention on my duties and Anakin but no matter how hard I tried, this ache within me overshadowed everything.

These last two tens, as his waking times were taken up more with treatments and therapy, I was permitted to see Qui-Gon for an hour at a time, three times a day, and not for a moment more. The anguish within me was almost unbearable so I had cajoled, begged and pleaded to have those brief intervals extended and when that failed I had tried sneaking in for extra visits. After the last time an apprentice found me asleep with my head on Qui-Gon's arm at 0300, the Master in charge of Healer's Hall had chided me for my lack of self-control and finally threatened to have me banned completely unless I complied with the visitation schedule, a decision that Master Windu told me later the Council fully endorsed.

So I had spent every moment not dedicated to my duties or to Anakin examining this overwhelming need within me. Food held no appeal and sleep had become something that I found tenuous at best so I spent hours on my knees or ensconced in Qui-Gon's beat-up old conforming chair dissecting my needs and fears.

"It's not much but you have to eat something," Bant ordered, her voice pulling me from my thoughts. She handed me a plate with some raw vegetables, cubes of cheese and bread while placing a cup of tea beside me. "I'm surprised you haven't ended up in Healer's Hall right along side Qui-Gon with the way you have neglected both eating and sleeping since he was injured."

I sat on the couch while Bant lectured me, picking at the food and trying to find something to say that would make her go back to her quarters and leave me in peace. "I'm fine, Bant, and it's only one more night. Qui-Gon will finally be coming home tomorrow."

But in classic Bant fashion, she was unwilling to let it go at that. "It was irresponsible of you, Obi-Wan. What kind of example are you setting for Anakin?"

That comment made me angry and it was more than evident in my tone of voice when I replied. "I have seen to all of Anakin's needs, both personal and in regards to his training, Bant. He has not suffered by my 'neglect', as you call it."

"Except to be worrying about both you and Master Qui-Gon," she retorted. "Is that the way to train an apprentice - do as I say, not as I do?" Her tone softened a bit as she added, "I don't think you have eaten a real meal or gotten a full night's sleep since it happened. I could understand it when the healers weren't sure your Master would recover but once he was out of danger..."

"Bant, I know that you are concerned for me but you just don't understand," I replied, trying to use a different tactic. Before I could say anything else, she interrupted.

"Well, explain it to me."

I thought about trying to put the feelings of anguish and loneliness into words but knew that I couldn't do it without the need and fear I was keeping so closely guarded being revealed. "It's a moot point now, Bant. Tomorrow everything will be as it should be."

I grabbed a few more pieces from the plate then rose from the couch. "If it will make you feel better, I'll even let you put me to sleep." When she smiled and nodded, I added, "just let me check on Anakin first."

As I headed into my old room to check on the boy, I thought back to the other nights Bant had used a sleep suggestion to try to get me to rest. The longest any of those had held was a few hours before I would awaken from a nightmare or more often just from the aching emptiness and sense of wrongness surrounding me. Here in the safety of the Temple, our quarters and our bed, we were supposed to be together, I needed us to be together, sleeping in each other's arms not half a complex apart. But trying to explain that illogical need to someone, even Bant - I can't sleep because Qui-Gon's not beside me - was more than I wanted to deal with. Anakin was sleeping soundly and, after pulling the covers that he had kicked off back over him, I went back into the common room.

Bant had collected my plate and mug, dropped them into the kitchen sink and was waiting by the door to the other bedroom when I emerged. "Not giving me a chance to change my mind, I see."

"Not on your life," she chuckled, as she opened the door and gestured me inside.

I had taken my boots off in the common room so it took me only a minute to strip the rest of the way down to my leggings. After a quick trip to the refresher, I was slipping under the covers of the bed under her watchful eye. With a gentle caress across my forehead, she placed her webbed hands on either side of my head and I felt the strong Force suggestion she sent into my mind. I felt myself tumbling into the depths of slumber even as she spoke softly, "sleep, Obi-Wan."

I came awake three hours later as my arm hit the cold sheets beside me when I rolled. I buried my face in Qui-Gon's pillow for a moment, breathing in the faint scent that had been synonymous with comfort for me for more than twelve years before rising from the bed. I knew that sleep would not return for me this night so I decided to spend the remaining hours until morning as I had almost every night since our return, in meditation. I had many issues still unresolved from the whole Naboo debacle and once we were together continually, Qui-Gon would easily pick up on my unease unless I did a better job of dealing with them.

So grabbing my Master's cloak from the wardrobe, I wrapped myself in it and moved out onto the small balcony off the bedroom. Pulling the deep hood fully over my head, I dropped to my knees. Using the faint presence ingrained in the cloth and the knowledge that this ordeal would soon be over to pull me to my meditative center, I settled into the flow of the Force and allowed my mind to float freely among my disruptive emotions.

When I came out of my deep trance, the sky was just beginning to lighten with the advent of morning and I was feeling much more in control. I had finally been able to purge the residual hurt and pain over my reaction to Anakin and to Qui-Gon's words in the Council Chamber. My own insecurities had played into those reactions and my meditation had helped me to see that. It had also shown me that I had to find some way to get past this sudden need for Qui-Gon beside me to feel safe, although I expected that this would take some time to do, especially in light of my behavior over the last few tens. Our training bond had always been unusually strong and since we had become lovers, it had only deepened. But duty had separated us many times and I had never before felt this overwhelming ache when we were apart. Even though we had planned to remain together after my Knighthood, our duties would not allow us to always be in the same place. Once Qui-Gon's recovery was complete, he would be training Anakin and I would be sent on various missions in my new role as a full Jedi Knight. Was it fear causing me to react this way; this need exploding because of how close I had come to losing him?

As I rose to my feet and reentered the bedroom, I decided that would have to be a topic for additional meditations at a later time. With Qui-Gon being released from the healers this afternoon, I had a ton of things to do. After hanging his cloak back in the wardrobe, I tossed a clean uniform on the bed and headed to the refresher. My shower and other ablutions were finished quickly and I dressed, retrieved my boots from the common room and began a quiet but organized once over of our quarters.

By the time Anakin emerged, bleary-eyed from his room, I had changed the linens, cleaned up, and was now ordering the things we needed to restock the kitchen from stores. "Morning Anakin. If you shower and dress quickly, we can share first-meal in the dining hall and have time to drop in on Master Qui-Gon before your first class."

"I'll be back in five minutes," he said with a smile, before disappearing back into his room. The water started in seconds and true to his word he was in the common room, the picture of a perfect Jedi apprentice, as I logged off the comm unit five minutes later.

The dining hall was just beginning to get busy but we managed to get through the line and find a table without too much difficulty. We ate quickly and I thought I had made a clean getaway, without anyone fussing over me, when I saw Bant and Master Windu approaching. "Busted," Anakin said under his breath and I wondered how many nights he had been awake and listening during one of their lectures.

"Obi-Wan, Anakin," Mace greeted. "You are up and about early this morning. I would have expected you would be slaving away in your quarters getting everything ready for your Master's homecoming."

"Especially since I thought you were planning on sleeping late this morning," Bant added sarcastically.

Anakin started to say something but the glare I gave him changed his mind. "First you complain because I'm not eating and now you complain when I do," I scoffed as I rose from the table and picked up my tray. "Anakin and I were having an early first-meal so he could see Qui-Gon before Anakin's first class. Now if you'll excuse me." I started to move from the table but Mace's hand on my arm stopped my progress.

"I would like to meet with you this afternoon before Qui-Gon is released," he said firmly, the option described in his choice of words belied by his stern tone of voice. "Say, after your class, 1530 in my office."

I thought about arguing, decided it was useless and just agreed. "I will see you then, Master Windu. Bant," I added as I left the table, Qui-Gon's next apprentice trailing behind me.

Anakin must have sensed my frustration because he walked the distance to Healer's Hall beside me without saying one word. We arrived just as Qui-Gon was being assisted into a chair for his first-meal and the boy went readily to his side. "Master Qui-Gon, you are looking much better this morning."

"Thank you, Ani, I am feeling better," my Master replied. "Must be the knowledge that I am finally being released from this infernal place," he added, glaring at the healer helping him. He beckoned me with his hand once the woman was finished adjusting the table in front of him.

"Good morning, Qui-Gon," I said as I placed a soft kiss on his cheek before dropping to my knees beside his chair.

"Good morning, my Obi-Wan," he replied, his eyes full of love, before turning his attention back to Anakin. He asked the boy about his classes and the floodgates were opened.

The two talked for about twenty minutes while Qui-Gon ate his meal before Anakin leaned in and hugged him gently. "I need to leave for class. I will see you tonight for late-meal and I'm glad you're finally coming home, Master Qui-Gon."

"As am I, Ani. Have a good day," Qui-Gon replied as the blond boy bounced out of the room. The hand that had been resting on mine on the arm of the chair reached up and cupped my cheek as he studied me intently. "You look even more tired than you did yesterday, Obi-Wan. When was the last time you had a full night's sleep?"

Leaning in for a real kiss now that we were alone, I thought about evading the question, even lying in answer, but the love and concern in those beautiful blue eyes stopped me. "Honestly. The night before we left for Naboo." I could see his shock at my answer so I quickly sought to reassure him. "Now that you'll be home, sleep should come much easier."

"Obi-Wan, you must take care of yourself," my Master cautioned.

"I have received this lecture more times than I care to admit in the past tens and expect to get it again this afternoon from Master Windu," I admitted. "Could we please discuss something else?"

"Seems like you haven't been listening," he admonished with a slight smile. "Why are you planning to see Mace?"

"My presence was requested when I ran into him in the dining hall this morning," I replied petulantly. "He did not tell me why."

Before either of us could say anything else, the healer from earlier returned. "Time for your respiratory therapy, Master Jinn," she said politely.

I rose up from my place beside his chair and leaned in to kiss him while the healer removed his meal tray to the hallway. "Guess I should leave now before they throw me out." Another quick kiss and I spoke softly against his lips. "Only a few more hours and you will be out of this place and back home where you belong, Qui-Gon."

"Not a moment too soon," he answered as the healer returned.

"I will try to come back before my class this afternoon," I said as I reached the door. With a wave of love coming back to me over our bond in reply, I left Qui-Gon to his therapy.

I spent a good portion of the three hours Anakin was in classes picking up the supplies I had ordered from Temple stores and getting them put away in our quarters. After that was done, I did the necessary preparation for the afternoon class I was teaching then went to the salles to meet Anakin. Not having been raised in Temple had put him way behind in the basic kata training that all initiates underwent so we had spent an hour each day working on this since our first week back at Temple. Anakin had flourished under the personal attention, improving a little each day, and we had gotten to know each other much better.

We shared mid-meal in the dining hall and when Anakin left for his afternoon classes, I headed back to Healer's Hall. Qui-Gon was asleep when I opened the door to his room, so after watching him from the doorway for a few minutes, I slowly backed out. The knowledge that he would be home in a few hours made it easier to give up spending this time with him. I made my way to my classroom through the gardens, taking time to really enjoy the plants and flowers growing there for the first time since I had returned to Coruscant. I walked slowly, stopping to talk to a few people along the way, relaxing for the first time in five tens.

By the time I reached my classroom, I was actually looking forward to seeing my students. Class was very productive and I was still feeling calm and composed when I reached Mace's office. His aide directed me in immediately and I took a seat across from him. "You wanted to see me, Master Windu," I said without preamble.

He studied me for a few moments in silence before finally speaking. "I am concerned about you, Obi-Wan. The last few tens have not been easy for you and caring for Qui-Gon while overseeing Anakin's training and your other duties will only add to your stress level."

"You are incorrect there, Master Windu," I contradicted with a slight smile. "Having Qui-Gon home will pretty much alleviate all of my stress."

He looked intently at me again and I could see true concern there. "I don't think you fully appreciate the challenges you will face in this. It will be quite a while before Qui-Gon is back to full strength and I expect he will be less than his cheerful, charming self while he is under these limitations." His expression turned more serious as he continued. "Obi-Wan, you have barely just been Knighted. You deserve the freedom of a few cycles of solo missions and the autonomy to go out and live a little as you complete them. You shouldn't be saddled with the responsibility of caring for your recovering Master and training a surrogate padawan."

A combination of anger and resentment built within me as Mace spoke and it took an almost extraordinary effort on my part to keep from rising from my chair and stalking from the room. I just stared at him as I contemplated his words, enraged that he would insinuate that anything I could do for Qui-Gon would be done out of obligation rather than love. But maybe this was our own fault. We had gotten the requisite approval from the Council before becoming lovers two years ago but we had never shared the depth of our feelings with anyone but each other, not even our closest friends, preferring to wait until the oaths of my apprenticeship were fulfilled. So although Mace knew that Qui-Gon and I were lovers, he could not know the strength of my commitment to him and that there was nowhere I wanted to be except at Qui-Gon's side.

"I truly appreciate your concern for my welfare, Master Windu, but there really is no need," I finally said respectfully. "I would not feel comfortable with anyone else seeing to Qui-Gon or Anakin's needs until my Master has fully recovered from his injuries. So as long as the Council is not ordering me on these missions and the choice to accept or decline is mine, I prefer to be assigned duties at Temple while I oversee Qui-Gon's recuperation."

Mace closed his eyes for a moment, steepling his fingers in his familiar sign of deep thought. When he opened his eyes, he looked at me with a feeble smile. "For the time being we will comply with your request, Knight Kenobi. But should you find that this is becoming too overwhelming for you, we will understand if you choose to reconsider."

"I don't expect that will happen but thank you for your thoughtfulness," I replied as I rose from my seat. "Now if there is nothing else, Master Windu, I'm sure Qui-Gon is anxious to leave Healer's Hall."

Mace rose from his seat as well and came over to where I was now standing. "You are a good man, Obi-Wan Kenobi. An asset to the Jedi Order and a credit to your Master's teaching."

"Thank you," I blurted out after a moment, surprised at this outpouring of praise.

"Give my regards to Qui-Gon and tell him that I will stop by to see him in the next day or so," Mace said as he opened the door for me.

"I will," I said and with that I left Mace's office and made my way quickly to Healer's Hall.

As I reached the door of the room, the sound of loud voices came spilling out into the hallway. "I am capable of getting back to my quarters without an escort, Master Jufa" Qui-Gon maintained in a firm tone.

"Unless you want to spend a few more days in these luxurious accommodations, you will agree to having me accompany you and insuring that you make the transfer without any ill affects," Meniet Jufa declared in the same tone.

"You must be feeling much better this afternoon, Master, if you have the spare energy to argue with Master Jufa," I teased in an attempt to lighten the mood.

"Ah, Knight Kenobi. Maybe you can get Master Jinn to see reason. I don't have all day to go around on this point," he said before turning back to glare at Qui-Gon. "You are way too stubborn to admit it but you were as close to dead as anyone I have ever seen recover. Although you have made significant progress, your injuries are far from completely healed. I will be back in five minutes. If by that time you haven't reconsidered, you will remain here until I am one hundred percent sure that you can make the transfer without ill affects, which could be days away." With that ultimatum laid down, he turned and disappeared in a flourished whirl of dark blue cloak.

Still smiling, I moved beside the chair where Qui-Gon sat and leaned in to place a gentle kiss on his lips. "Must be our day for lectures, my Master," I said as I pulled back. "We seem to draw the attention of well meaning people intent on protecting us from ourselves." He quirked an eyebrow at the comment but I took his hand in mine and quickly redirected the conversation. "But for now, you will agree to whatever Master Jufa says since I have no intention of spending even one more night alone."

He looked at me with a wry smile before saying, "Do you have any other orders for me, Master?"

I could feel my face heating at his teasing comment. "Umm, maybe I shouldn't have worded that quite that way. My apologies, Master, but I stand firm with the concept behind the words. Being apart from you these past tens has been unbearable."

"For me as well, my own," Qui-Gon whispered as he squeezed my hand. "I will agree to anything so long as I can return home."

I had helped Qui-Gon slowly to his feet by the time Master Jufa returned to the room. "Whenever you are ready, Master Jufa," Qui-Gon said and without a word the healer retrieved a repulsor chair from the hallway.

It took only a few moments for us to get my Master settled into the chair with a bag containing the few personal belongings that I had brought to him. The trip back to our quarters took longer than I would have liked, numerous people stopping to give well wishes and support. When we finally reached the door, I could see the signs of fatigue on Qui-Gon's face. As we made our way into the common room, worry filled me and I turned to him. "Maybe we should get you settled directly in the bedroom, Master, so you can rest before late-meal?"

"No, I would like to remain out here," he said adamantly. "I have spent the last five tens in the confines of the infirmary. I do not intend to spend my first hours home isolated in the bedroom."

Master Jufa positioned the repulsor chair right beside Qui-Gon's worn conforming chair and bent over him to check him. I stood a meter away, watching intently as the Master Healer used a combination of a medical scanner and the Force to ascertain his patient's current condition. After a few moments of silence, he spoke. "You seem to have made the transition without too much strain. Your breathing is a bit shallower and your heart rate is slightly elevated but nothing that an hour of total relaxation in your chair won't relieve."

He motioned to me and together we helped Qui-Gon shift from the repulsor chair to his old one, settling him gingerly against the worn cushions. Noticing a slight shiver in the large body, I pulled the frayed blanket from the back of the sofa and placed it loosely over him. "Thank you, Padawan," he said with a smile before looking intently at the Master Healer. "I know I have not been the most cooperative patient, Meniet, but I do appreciate all you and the entire staff of Healer's Hall have done to aid my recovery. Thank you."

"You're welcome. You have made remarkable progress, Qui-Gon, but you still have a long road ahead of you," Jufa declared. "Listen to me and to your own body. Don't try to rush your recovery or you will again find yourself as a guest in my humble establishment," he added with a smile.

"Don't worry, I will take care," Qui-Gon chuckled. "No offense but if I never return to your little section of the Temple it will be too soon."

"I will ensure that he follows all of your directives to the letter, Master Jufa," I assured him as the healer started to the door.

"I will be back to check on you tomorrow, Qui-Gon," Jufa said as he walked. "If either of you have any questions or concerns, do not hesitate to call me."

"We won't," I replied. I palmed open the door and as he walked through it, I added resolutely. "I'll watch him like a hawkbat, Master." With a nod and a slight smile, he started down the hallway in the direction of Healer's Hall.

I allowed the door to slide closed behind me, placed the empty repulsor chair in the corner of the room then moved back to Qui-Gon. "Is there anything you want or need, my Master?" I asked as I looked down at him.

"Just your company, my Padawan or should I say, my Knight," he said softly.

I dropped onto my knees beside his chair, laying my head down on his covered thighs. "There is no place I would rather be," I whispered.

We sat in silence, just basking in the ability to be together without any restrictions or constraints. Nothing existed at that moment but our love and need to be together. I have no idea how much time had gone by when I heard the door sliding open and Anakin came flying into the room.

"Master Qui-Gon, you're home," he cried as he came to a stop at the side of the chair.

"And very happy to be here, Ani," he replied as he opened his arms to the young boy.

I raised my head from Qui-Gon's legs, sliding back a bit to allow Anakin room to accept the gentle hug and was surprised and very pleased to find that I did not feel even a twinge of jealousy towards the boy's place in my Master's life and heart.

As Anakin stepped back, I smiled at him. "Why don't you keep Master Qui-Gon company while I get late-meal started?"

With a broad smile, the boy shifted to kneel in the spot I was rising from and began to animatedly relay the details of his day to our Master. Warmth washed through me as my mind actually formed that thought - our Master, for that is who he truly was. While he would always be my Master, as he had been for two others before me, he would now also be Anakin's Master and I was comfortable with that notion. That more than all my hours of meditation told me that I had finally banished my feelings of resentment towards my successor and was secure with my own place in Qui-Gon's life and heart.

Heading into the kitchen, I gathered the things I needed to make our meal to the sounds of their voices. I focused a wisp of my attention on Qui-Gon's condition but otherwise allowed the two this personal time. I cut and prepared the ingredients for one of my Master's favorite dishes, glad to be able to spoil him a bit after those tens of infirmary food. The voices faded off after a little while and Anakin came into the kitchen a few minutes after I felt Qui-Gon drift off to sleep.

"Need any help, Obi-Wan?" he asked as he reached my side.

"Sure," I replied, pushing the cutting board towards him.

We worked together comfortably, the past tens of interaction helping us to begin to develop a camaraderie. It didn't take long for us to get everything prepared and after it started cooking, Anakin turned to me. "I have some questions from my ethics class. Master Qui-Gon said he would review them with me but he fell asleep. Could you help me with it?"

"Certainly," I replied, directing him back into the common room after checking the pots.

Anakin retrieved his datapads from the backpack he had dropped coming in while I took a moment to drape another blanket over Qui-Gon's sleeping form. Together, we settled down on the couch and began reviewing his work, taking care to keep our voices low so as to not disturb our Master.

Qui-Gon woke from his short nap just as Anakin and I finished his review. "Perfect timing, Master. Late-meal is just about ready. If you want to stay in your chair, I can prepare a plate for you?"

"I would like to come to the table. I want to get back to some semblance of a normal life even if it only occurs at mealtime," he replied, tossing aside the blankets I had covered him with.

"Okay. After we have everything set up, I'll come and assist you."

Anakin rose from the couch with me and we worked quickly to set the table and bring out all the food. I moved back into the common room as Anakin was pouring tea into our mugs and blue milk into his glass.

"Ready, Master?" When he nodded, I helped him to his feet, placing my arm securely around his waist as we walked to the table.

"Aldorian chucata and lonatie greens. Smells wonderful. You will spoil me, Obi-Wan," Qui-Gon said as settled into his chair.

"As long and as often as I can," I vowed as I sat down. I spooned a portion of each item onto his plate and passed it back to Qui-Gon then served Anakin and myself.

We enjoyed an unhurried, relaxing meal, sharing pleasant conversation as we ate. Time passed without notice and by the time I went back into the kitchen to get the chocobari mousse I had made for dessert, over an hour had passed. I could see that Qui-Gon was tiring from sitting in the straight-backed chair so I suggested, "Let's have dessert in the common room," as I deposited the dessert tray on the small table beside the couch. I went back to the table to assist him to his conforming chair then dropped onto the couch beside Anakin.

By the time we had finished dessert, exhaustion was radiating from Qui-Gon and I could see he had pushed himself as far as he ought to. "Anakin, would you mind cleaning up while I help Master Qui-Gon prepare for bed?"

"Sure," he replied, getting up and stacking the dessert dishes onto the tray.

"Thank you," I said as I helped my Master to his feet.

"Please come in to say goodnight when you are finished, Ani," Qui-Gon requested as we started towards the bedroom.

"I will, Master," he assured as he headed into the kitchen.

We moved slowly into the bedroom, my arm and the Force helping to keep my fatigued Master standing. When we reached the bed, I helped him sit down and began to remove his boots. "I was going to suggest a shower but I don't think you are up for it."

"No, I don't think I could manage it as inviting as it sounds," he agreed.

I tossed the boots aside and began to unwrap his sash. "Well, I'll just have to try my hand at being a healer and give you a sponge bath," I said with a smirk. He quirked an eyebrow but said nothing so I continued to help him undress. When he was down to just his leggings, I assisted him to the refresher then back to the bed. I pulled back the covers, took a moment to peel off his leggings, and then helped him to lie back on the bed. "I'll be right back."

It took me just a couple of minutes to gather a small basin filled with warm, soapy water, a soft washcloth and a towel and bring it back into the bedroom. Qui-Gon was lying back with his eyes closed as I wrung out the washcloth and began passing it over his arms and chest. He started a little when the warm fabric first made contact with his skin but quickly relaxed into the comforting touches. It didn't take long before I had wiped down his entire body and dried his skin with the soft towel. I propped a pillow against the headboard and helped him to sit up so that I could brush his hair. In a couple of minutes, I had all the tangles smoothed out and had plaited the heavy mass into a loose braid.

As I removed the pillow and helped him slide down to stretch out fully, I dropped a quick kiss to his lips. "Comfortable?" I asked as I pulled the soft bedding over his naked body.

"Very," he said with a small sigh. "You have no idea how good it feels to be lying in my own bed." He reached out to take my hand and added, "Though it would be much better if you were lying in it with me."

"As soon as I have Anakin settled into his bed for the night, I will do just that," I agreed enthusiastically. "Let me go and help him finish cleaning up and I'll return in a few minutes."

When Qui-Gon nodded, I headed into the kitchen. Anakin had made a good dent in the cleanup and I set about to help him. We were putting away the last few items when I caught him glancing at me with a confused look. "Do you have a question about something, Anakin?"

"Yes, sort of, but it's probably none of my business," the boy blurted out after a moment of silence.

If the normally forthright Anakin was being this timid about something it had to be important so I directed him back into the common room as I spoke. "Anakin, I want you to feel you can speak freely to me about anything. There may be times when I will be unable to answer your questions for a variety of reasons but you should never feel that you cannot ask me or Master Qui-Gon anything."

"Okay. Since you gave me your bedroom and Master Qui-Gon is now home and sleeping in his, where will you sleep?" he asked with much concern.

Of all the questions this nine year old before me could have asked that was the last one I expected, though realistically I shouldn't have been surprised. Now to find a way to explain this to him without going into too much detail.

"Well, you see Anakin, Master Qui-Gon and I have a different relationship than most Masters and Padawans." I stopped to think for a minute then started again. "Master Qui-Gon and I love each other." I stopped again and I could feel embarrassment beginning to color my cheeks. "Not that this happens often or is expected in any way but we are more to each other." Letting the words fade out again, I almost laughed at my distress. I could negotiate with heads of state but couldn't find the words to tell this child about Qui-Gon and I. Finally I decided that there was no easy way to do this so I just blurted it out. "Master Qui-Gon and I are lovers, Anakin. We have been for almost two years."

"So you'll be sleeping with him in his room?" When I nodded, blushing again, an extremely relieved look crossed his face as he said. "Oh good. I was feeling guilty that because you gave me your room when I came to live here, you were going to have to sleep on the couch or the floor."

I chortled at my own discomfiture, reading into Anakin's question and making this discussion much more complicated then it needed to be. But since he had brought it up, I figured I might as well use the opportunity to tackle the subject. "Anakin, do you have any other questions about this?"

"Not really," he said with a smile. "It's plain to see that you and Master Qui-Gon love each other."

"Yes, we do, Anakin," I declared. "Though not too many people know about this aspect of our relationship. Master Qui-Gon and I are private people."

"I understand, Obi-Wan," he replied softly.

"Let's go see if Master Qui-Gon is still awake," I suggested as I rose from the couch.

As we moved through the doorway, he turned to look at us. "Thought you two had forgotten about me," he teased.

Anakin moved quickly to sit on the edge of the bed. "I just came in to say goodnight. I have some reading to do for class in the morning." He leaned forward and kissed Qui-Gon on the cheek. "I am so glad you're finally home, Master Qui-Gon."

"Me too, Ani," Qui-Gon replied as wrapped the boy in a loose hug. "I will see you at first-meal, Padawan."

Anakin's face lit up at the use of his new title and I could feel the contentment coming from him as he rose. "Maybe Obi-Wan will be able to get some sleep now that you're home." He was still smiling when he came up and hugged me. "Night, Obi-Wan. I will be in bed within the hour so don't worry about me."

"Good night, Anakin," I said, thinking as I returned his hug that he was much too observant by half. When I released him, he headed straight for his own room and I moved to sit in the place he had vacated on the bed. "Anakin was concerned that I would have to sleep on the floor since I gave him my room so I explained things to him."

"Not in too much detail, I hope," Qui-Gon teased as he reached for my hand. "He is only nine."

"No, but he did have me floundering a bit as I tried to explain that I would be sleeping with you," I chuckled. "He took it all in stride, said he could see that we loved each other."

"Smart boy. Now unless you have a better offer, how about if you get into this bed with me," he ordered as he tugged weakly on my hand.

I leaned in for a kiss before bending down to removed my boots. "As if I could possibly have a better offer," I said as I stood up. I quickly stripped out of my clothes and, after a brief trip to the refresher, I maneuvered myself carefully to lie down beside him. "Are you sure that I won't hurt you laying with you?"

He leaned in and kissed me, a gentle kiss, full of the promise of the love he felt for me. "I'm sure. Since the day I regained consciousness, I have dreamt of once again sleeping with you wrapped in my arms, my own. Not even my battered body will keep me from that." After another kiss, he rolled onto his side, held out his arms and whispered, "Come to me, love."

Emotion swelled within me as I looked into his love-filled gaze. After a moment, I rolled onto my side, sliding backwards very carefully until my back rested against his front. I failed to stifle the sob that welled up within me as my skin finally came into contact with Qui-Gon's. The feel of his chest against my back, his arm draping over my chest, his flaccid penis resting in the crack of my ass surged through me, permeating every cell of my being with the loving comfort of his presence and banishing the emptiness that had saturated me since Naboo. As I relished the feeling of his skin against mine, a series of soft sobs escaped from me and I couldn't stop the tears that began to flow.

"Obi-Wan, what is it?" Qui-Gon asked, as his hand reached up to trail through the wetness dripping down my cheeks.

My emotions were so jumbled that I wasn't sure I could put what I was feeling into words but the concern in his voice was so compelling I had to try. "I missed you so much, Qui-Gon. I would lie here at night unable to sleep, craving the slightest touch of your skin against mine. Sometimes, I would dream that I was wrapped in your arms and when I awoke to the empty bed, the feeling of loneliness was suffocating."

"I am so sorry, love," he began, continuing to wipe tears from my cheek but I stopped him.

"No," I cried out, shamed to think that my admission was causing Qui-Gon to worry about me. "You were the one suffering, the one who still is enduring all this pain and debility. I am just being weak and selfish, allowing my own failings to rule me."

"You have failed no one, least of all me," he insisted. "You saved me, Padawan, and then gave yourself wholeheartedly to Anakin even in your pain for the way I treated you in the Council Chamber. There is nothing weak or selfish in that behavior."

Although I didn't fully believe him, having Qui-Gon speak those reassuring words filled me with warmth and tenderness. I lay silent for a few moments and when he spoke again, I knew that he had picked up on my disbelief. "How do I convince you?" he asked, exhaustion causing his voice to tremble slightly.

"It doesn't matter, now. All that matters now is that you're home, on your way to a full recovery and we're together," I reassured. "You need to sleep; I can feel your fatigue."

I felt his sigh of resignation even before he spoke. "Yes I do and you are weary as well but this conversation is not concluded - just postponed." Bring his hand back down from my face, he clasped it over mine, tightened his hold around me and kissed the top on my head. "Let us sleep now and protect each other's dreams."

Snuggling back as closely as I could without causing discomfort, I relaxed into the large body behind me. "Sleep well, my Master. I love you." I could feel his breathing slowing down, not quite the easy pace of sleep I had been accustomed to hearing but much less labored than in the infirmary. I concentrated on the sound as well as the feel of his breath against my neck as he exhaled, letting that and his skin against mine, provide the comfort I needed to drift off into sleep myself.

I was surprised to find the room beginning to lighten when I opened my eyes. It had been shortly after 2100 hours when Qui-Gon and I had given up conversation for sleep and the chrono now read 0549, which meant that I had actually slept for over eight hours. Qui-Gon was still sleeping lightly. Neither of us had shifted more than a few centimeters during the night and his arm was still draped possessively over my chest.

Taking extra care when I moved so as not to wake him, I turned in his embrace so that I could look upon him. Gently pushing away a few strands of his now disheveled hair, I studied the beloved visage before me. Caught in a restful sleep, the lines and dark circles that had sprouted up around his eyes from pain and lack of sleep were much less pronounced. His face was a bit more drawn, thinner, no doubt because of the substantial amount of weight he had lost battling his injuries. The chestnut hair seemed duller and with substantially more silver streaking it and his beard was scruffier, lacking the precise trim lines Qui-Gon was so methodical with.

As I scrutinized him, my heart ached for all he had undergone is the past tens and our conversation from the night before echoed within me. I ran the ends of his hair through my fingertips as I contemplated. Although he may not feel that I failed him, I was certain that I had and never with more dire consequences than on Naboo. I may have kept him alive but I should have been able to prevent him from being injured in the first place.

I had spent hundreds of hours reliving the battle since that fateful day, trying to figure out how things had gone so wrong. Getting knocked off the catwalk and then taking so long to get my breath back and rejoin the battle were the two things that always came to the fore during these reviews. That coupled with my insecurity and childish arguing during the mission and the overwhelming need and dependence I had been feeling since our return to Temple made me wonder at the Council's wisdom of considering me ready for Knighthood. I may have killed our Sith opponent but my inability to control my thoughts and emotions spoke volumes towards my self doubt.

I could see Qui-Gon beginning to stir so I pushed all those maudlin thoughts deep behind my shields and waited for his eyes to open. As those lids lifted slowly to reveal his blue eyes, I smiled. "Good morning, Master. Did you sleep well?" Without waiting for a reply, I leaned in for a kiss.

"Very well. I woke up briefly a couple of times but was able to go back to sleep easily," he explained. "Must be the combination of my own bed and my bedmate," he chuckled as he kissed me in return.

"For me it's definitely my bedmate. I actually slept the entire night as well," I quipped as I wrapped my arms around him. We lay like that for a few minutes but soon I felt my body's basic needs demanding my attention so I pulled out of his embrace. "I'll be back in a minute," I said as I rolled to my feet and headed into the refresher. After relieving myself, I went back to help Qui-Gon to the facilities to do the same.

When he finished, he looked up at me with a smile. "Is that offer for a shower still open, Padawan, because if it is I would love to take you up on it?"

"Definitely," I answered as I directly him into the stall.

A scowl formed on his face when he noticed the plastene chair that was placed against the wall. "What is that for? I'm sure that I can stand for the duration of a shower, Padawan."

I had expected this reaction so I had my reply all prepared. "I'm sure you can, Master. But until you can do so without it tiring you out, I would prefer you save your energy for more important things, like spending time with Anakin and me." He grumbled a bit more then acquiesced and sat down when I placed the chair under the warm spray.

The shower was wonderful. After his initial arguments faded, he allowed me to wash him. I ran the soft, soapy cloth over him from head to toe, taking extra care around the area of his healing wounds. As I worked we chatted about everything and nothing, light conversation about the goings on of the Temple and our friends. I took my time as I lathered the heavy mass of hair, luxuriating in feeling the familiar silken weight in my hands after all this time. When I finished, I left him sitting in the comfort of the warm spray while I cleaned myself.

Once done, I helped him to his feet, pushed the seat back out of the way and stood under the spray with him to rinse the remaining lather from our bodies. Reluctantly, I turned off the water and slid open the door to grab towels. After wrapping his dripping hair into one, I used the other to dry him from shoulders to feet then wrapped the towel around his hips. I took a moment to dry myself then led him back to the chair in our bedroom.

"I didn't think you'd want to spend your days dressed only in your robe and worn sleep pants and full uniforms and boots aren't very comfortable to rest in, so I got you a couple new sets of lounging clothes at stores, " I said as I walked to the dresser. I pulled out the soft blue velour tunic and leggings plus underclothing and a pair of thick treaded socks and went back over to show him. "I hope you don't mind."

"That was very thoughtful, love," he said as he reached out to touch the soft fabric. "Though after a couple of tens dressed in those, I may never want to put on my uniform and boots again," he added with a smile.

"I can't see that happening, Master," I scoffed. "It's more likely that I'll have to sit on you to keep you from trying to head to the salles by the end of the ten."

I helped him dress, got into my own uniform then we headed slowly into the common room. I scarcely had him settled into his chair when a barely awake Anakin barreled towards the refresher. "When Ani returns, he can keep you company while I prepare first-meal."

"I don't need a keeper, Obi-Wan," my Master replied a bit petulantly.

I kissed him before I winked and said. "I'm not so sure about that. Seriously, I think Anakin would enjoy spending some time with you before he has to leave for class. He has missed you as well, Master."

After another kiss, I headed into the kitchen to prepare first-meal. Qui-Gon's presence in our quarters seemed to create a calmness in me that I hadn't felt in way too long and I basked in the feeling. I took my time preparing the meal, giving Ani some one on one time to spend with our Master. I went in once, bringing them each a glass of fresh juice, and then went back to my task. We had risen early enough that Anakin would have plenty of time to shower and dress after first- meal so I let them visit until I had brought everything to the table.

When the preparation was done, I returned to the common room and addressed them. "Come you two, first-meal awaits." As I helped Qui-Gon to his feet, I noticed that he rose from the chair a bit easier than he had last night and I wondered how much of that was just the comfort of being home. If so, perhaps his recovery rate would increase as well.

First-meal was much like late-meal the night before, pleasant and highly enjoyable, and I even found that my appetite was returning. As I took a second helping of fried yoegs and tubers, Anakin piped up. "I'll have to tell Bant you're eating again, Obi-Wan, so she'll stop lecturing you."

I tossed a glare at him as I saw Qui-Gon react to his comment but the damage had already been done. "Why haven't you been eating, Obi-Wan?" he asked with concern.

"I have been eating, a little less than normal maybe, but it's not like I've been starving myself," I tried to explain, unable to keep all the annoyance from my voice. "I just haven't been very hungry." I could see by Qui-Gon's look that he wasn't quite convinced but he let the subject drop.

During the rest of the meal, our conversation went back to more mundane matters and I began to relax again. The last thing I wanted was to have Qui-Gon worrying about me; he needed to put all his energy into his recovery.

Anakin offered to clean up but I sent him off to get ready for class. I would have plenty of time to do it later. After Qui-Gon was settled into his conforming chair, I poured us each another mug of tea. I went into the common room to join him, handing him his mug then dropping to kneel beside his chair. It was so good to just be in each other's company that we settled back, sipping our tea but not saying anything.

The silence was only broken when Anakin came into the room and gathered up his datapads. "Kata practice before mid-meal, Obi-Wan?" he asked as he stuffed them into his backpack.

I looked between the boy and my Master, trying to decide what I should do, but Qui-Gon saw through my dilemma and said, "Obi-Wan, you need to continue with your normal schedule. I'll be fine on my own for a few hours."

I thought about arguing but could see by Qui-Gon's expression that it would be a waste of time. "Salle eighteen, normal time, Anakin. I'll see you then," I acquiesced.

Draping his backpack over his shoulder, he gave both his Master and me a hug then strode out the door with a "see you both later."

I started to get up but a hand on my arm prevented me from rising. "First you tell me you haven't been sleeping and now I find out you haven't been eating well either. That is not like you, Obi-Wan."

Part of me fought the thought of having this conversation, but I knew that even if I could postpone it, I couldn't avert it forever so I decided to just get it over with. "It wasn't a conscious thing, Qui-Gon. I would go to sleep but wake after a couple hours and not be able to get back to sleep. And food just had no appeal. I would force myself to eat enough for sustenance but it was much less than I normally eat."

"And why do you think that was?" he asked, concern and anxiety evident in his blue eyes.

"I spent hours meditating on it, trying to find a reason for my lack of control over my own body, but couldn't come up with a cause for my failure," I said sadly.

"Not a failure, love, just a hindrance and one I am sure you'll find a solution for," he encouraged.

His love and devotion washed through me as he spoke and I found it giving me the strength to open up more. "We have been apart for long periods numerous times but I have never felt like this before. It was almost as if my body was rebelling at our separation, like an addict's body craving a drug." I reached for his hand and clasped it tightly. "The longer I was apart from you, the greater the ache became."

Qui-Gon was looking at me intently, contemplating my statements but before he could say anything the door chime rang. I opened it to find Master Yoda waiting outside it and ordering in his normal grumble, "Invite me in. Visit my Padawan, I will."

I moved aside as I greeted him, glad for the reprieve in that emotional conversation. "Good morning, Master Yoda. Please come in." When the elderly Master had reached the couch, I asked, "Would you like some tea?"

"Tea, yes. Nice that would be," he replied, so I left him to maneuver into the Yoda sized chair that had always graced these quarters, picked up our mugs and headed into the kitchen.

After I set a fresh pot of tea to steep, I collected the dishes from the table and began cleaning up from first-meal. I ignored the conversation in the common room, deep in thought over the revelation I had shared with my Master. I had spoken from my heart and my mind was now wondering at the descriptions I had used. Even as I said the words to him, the Force surged within me, seeming to agree with my assessment of the situation. But what could have caused such a reliance in me where one had not existed previously? Before I could think more on it, the aroma of brewed tea pulled me from my pondering.

I prepared a mug for each of them, knowing from years of experience exactly how they both liked it, and took the cups into the common room. I was heading back to finish my clean up when Yoda's voice stopped me. "Tired you look, Obi-Wan. Taking care of yourself you are not."

The last thing I needed at this moment was another lecture but I managed to keep from rolling my eyes while I replied politely. "Now that my Master is home, I will rest more easily."

He stared up at me intently and I could feel the wave of the Force he used to appraise my physical state. As quickly as it began it ended, a tiny drooping of his ears and a low "hmm" his only comment to his scan before he changed the subject. "How fares young Skywalker's training?"

I dropped into the seat across from him as I replied, "He seems to be adjusting well to Temple life. I have received good reports from his teachers and he is making steady progress learning the katas." I smiled at my Master and added, "Once he is under the guiding hand of Master Qui-Gon, I'm certain his progress will soar."

Qui-Gon shot me a scolding look but Yoda spoke before he could speak. "Established a bond with him, have you?"

"No, Master," I replied, looking at him with confusion. Although back in the reactor room on Theed Qui-Gon had made me promise that I would train the boy, once my Master's recovery was assured, I had considered myself absolved of that pledge. "It is not my place to do so. I am only working with him until Master Qui-Gon can assume his place with the boy."

Those all-seeing eyes studied me further and only years of training kept me from fidgeting under the intense stare. Finally, he looked up at Qui-Gon, rose from his seat and placed a bony hand on his knee. "Go now I must. Visit you again soon, I will, my Padawan."

"Goodbye, my Master. Thank you for coming," Qui-Gon responded as he covered the hand on his knee with one of his own.

I accompanied Master Yoda to the door and, after my own goodbye, closed the door and moved back to my seat on the couch. "What was that all about?"

Qui-Gon's shoulders lifted in an uncharacteristic shrug. "Your guess is as good as mine. Being his padawan never made me privy to how his mind works." He reached for my hand and squeezed it gently. "But he will share his thoughts with us when he is ready and not a moment before, so my suggestion is just to forget about it."

"Easier said than done, Master," I said with a smile before changing the subject. "So how would you like to spend your first morning home? Reading, a holovid, perhaps beginning a game of dejarik?"

A haughty smile bloomed on his face as he replied. "Dejarik, Padawan? Are you certain you want to undertake another game? Your track record against me has not been very good."

I rose from my seat as I answered. "Well, maybe I'm hoping I can take advantage of your weakened state." Without giving him a chance for a retort, I said, "Let me finish cleaning up from first-meal and I'll set up the board."

It took me only a few minutes to finish cleaning up, refill our mugs and place the game board on the repositioned table between his chair and the couch. Pieces were quickly arranged on the board and the game began.

It was a wonderful way to spend an hour, the slow pace of the strategic game allowing us plenty of time for light conversation. This type of activity was something we had time for too seldom and we both enjoyed it immensely. All too soon, I noticed that it was almost time for me to meet Anakin. I made my current move, set the board and table aside then rose from my seat. "I am due to meet Anakin so we'll have to stop for the time being."

"Just as well, Padawan," he maintained. "I'm finding myself tiring a bit and I wouldn't want you to take advantage of my fatigue."

I chuckled as I helped him to his feet and led him into our bedroom. I was relieved to see that even after sitting up all this time, he was walking a bit steadier. A quick stop in the refresher and I was tucking him under the covers and kissing him goodbye. "I will get mid-meal from the dining hall on my way back. Any preferences?"

"Surprise me," he replied with a smile.

After another kiss, I clipped my saber to my belt and headed out of our quarters in the direction of the salles.

Anakin was just beginning his stretches when I arrived and, after his brief inquiry after Qui-Gon, we got right to work. Things really went well during our practice session, Anakin taking all my instructions precisely and effectively mastering the new movements. As I stood back and watched him flawlessly complete another repetition of the routine, a small part of me wondered if my own disquiet had been seeping into him and affecting his lessons. Another topic to add to my list of things to meditate upon.

I tossed him a towel from his bag and wrapped an arm around his shoulder. "You did really well today, Ani. Your focus and concentration were excellent."

"Thanks, Obi-Wan," he said, his delight at the compliment evident. "Everything you have shown me in the past few days just seemed to come together today."

"You definitely have mastered that kata," I assured him.

"Maybe we can start on the next level tomorrow?" he asked hopefully, then smiled. "I can't wait to tell Master Qui-Gon."

"Well, let's head into the dining hall to grab some food and you can tell him over mid-meal," I replied as I directed the boy to grab his bag and follow me.

The dining hall was very busy when we arrived so I sidestepped the serving line and went straight to the staff with my requests. News that Qui-Gon had been released from the infirmary had spread quickly and they were more than happy to pack up everything I wanted. A few people came up to talk to us while we waited, some to ask about my Master, others friends of mine checking up on me. I was just accepting the bag of containers when an all too familiar voice called out to me.

"Just feeding Anakin and your Master or did you get something for yourself as well?" Bant asked with a touch of sarcasm.

As I glared at her, Anakin moved closer to her and whispered, "You don't have to worry anymore, Bant. He even had seconds at first-meal."

"Anakin," I warned and the boy came quickly back to my side. I handed him the bag then moved directly in front of my friend. "Bant, you're like my kid sister," I said softly as I placed an arm around her shoulders. "I know that you worry about me but if you don't stop hounding me I'm going to forget my training and beat you up like just like a big brother." My attempt at a menacing scowl failed miserably because she just started to laugh.

"Okay, I'll lay off for now," Bant replied between chuckles. "But I'll still be watching and if I see you revert, I'll pay a visit to Master Jinn and share my concerns with him."

Without deigning to reply, I motioned to Anakin and we headed from the dining hall, Bant's chuckles still echoing softly in the background.

When we reached our quarters, I started a pot of tea and left Anakin to set the food and utensils on the table after his shower as I went into the bedroom. I watched Qui-Gon stretch carefully as his eyes came open to look up at me. "Enjoy your nap?" I asked before leaning in to greet him properly.

As the gentle, lingering kiss ended he smiled. "Enjoyed being woken up more." I reached down to help him into a seated position but he waved me off. "Let me try to do it on my own."

So I moved back one step, far enough to give him room but close enough to help him if needed and watched. He tossed the covers aside and rolled onto his side. As he shifted on the bed in tiny increments, determination and concentration were evident in his face. To see this normally graceful and fluid man struggling with such a basic thing as rising from the bed made my heart ache. I fought my overprotective desire to reach down and pull him into my arms as he struggled, giving in to it only briefly by using a tendril of the Force to keep him from toppling when he finally maneuvered himself to sit on the edge of the bed.

He looked at me wryly, though evidently pleased with himself, when I sat down on the bed beside him. "Wonder if I can use that as my exercise for the day and get out of my afternoon therapy session?"

I couldn't help but laugh as I wrapped my arm around his shoulder and leaned into him. "If you can get Master Jufa to agree to that, you are a much stronger negotiator that anyone ever gave you credit for."

"I hold no such aspirations, Padawan," he declared, nodding at me to show he was ready to continue. I supported his arm as he rose slowly to his feet, swaying precariously but managing to stand with minimal assistance.

He glared at me as I put my arm around his waist but I held firm. "One thing at a time, my Master. Plus you need to save some strength for Master Jufa's torment, I mean therapy." Before he could comment, I led him in a slow pace into the kitchen. I helped him into his chair then retrieved the pot of tea to fill our mugs before dropping into my own.

The meal went much like the others had. We shared comfortable conversation with Anakin telling our Master about his morning classes and our practice. He talked very excitedly about the kata he had mastered, getting a promise from our Master to watch a workout as soon as he felt strong enough. Qui-Gon quizzed him a bit about his ethics class and before we knew it, it was time for Anakin's afternoon classes.

After he left, I assisted Qui-Gon to his comfy chair in the common room. I handed him a datapad containing the text of an ancient history tome he had been reading and went back to clean up. When everything was scrubbed and stored away, I gathered the texts for my afternoon class and settled on the couch to prepare as he read. We had often spent hours like this but usually I had been studying for my classes and he had been reviewing mission reports or doing research. In those days, I had taken the quiet, companionable times for granted not realizing what a treasure they were. But today I was fully aware of how quickly everything could be ripped away so I basked in the comfort of our togetherness. A few times I stopped working to just look at him, bliss filling me from the joy inherent in having him beside me. But ever attentive to my presence, I never got to look for more than a few moments before he felt my attention and looked over at me with a smile.

I was just gathering up my materials for class, when the door chime rang. When I palmed it open, I was not surprised to see Master Jufa standing in the hallway since we had prearranged for Qui-Gon's therapy to occur during my class period. "Good afternoon, Master Jufa. Please come in."

"Good day, Knight Kenobi. Has your patient been behaving for you?" he asked with a slight smile.

"Mostly," I replied in a mock whisper as Qui-Gon glared at us from his chair. As the healer came into the room, I tossed my datapads into my backpack and turned to them, saying cheerfully, "I'm off to my class. Enjoy your visit, Masters." Shouldering my backpack, I left our quarters to my Master's mental voice echoing in my head. I am keeping track of all these little jabs, my own, so once I have recovered you had best be on your guard.

I look forward to it, I sent back as I made my way to my classroom.

Class went well, though taking a little longer than usual, as three of my students needed a bit of extra assistance. I was surprised to find Master Jufa sitting on the couch waiting for me when I entered our common room and it must have showed in my expression because he spoke before I could.

"Nothing is wrong, Obi-Wan," he reassured. "Qui-Gon is resting after his therapy and I just wanted to talk to you for a few minutes."

I relaxed at his reassurance, sat on the couch beside him and waited for him to speak.

"Coming home has done wonders for Qui-Gon," he said. "He is more contented and optimistic and is attacking his therapy with a new vigor." He glanced back at the door to the bedroom then looked at me intently. "But therein lies my worry. I fear he may push himself too hard and cause a setback or worse."

"I plan on keeping a close eye on him, Master Jufa, and will not allow him to drive himself too intensely," I declared. I could see his confusion at my choice of words.

"I know that you and Qui-Gon have a much stronger bond than most Master/Padawan pairs but you can't be that attuned to his physical state," he said resolutely.

I closed my eyes and concentrated, knowing no other way to explain to him. "He is worn out from his session, the left side of his chest and left arm are very achy and he is just dozing off," I asserted as I opened my eyes.

"How?" he queried incredulously, but before we could begin to discuss it his comlink beeped. After talking for a moment into the unit, he returned his attention to me. "I am needed in Healer's Hall but I must know. Have you always been able to read him like that through your bond?"

I couldn't understand why he was so flustered. We had always been in tune with one another. "Since the earliest days of our bond, I have been able to sense his general well being and strongest emotions and as the years passed our attunement with one another grew." Seeing his disbelieving look deepen, I asked, "Is that unusual?"

"To the level you just displayed, definitely," he asserted, his expression one of deep thought. "I would like to discuss this further with both of you but for now duty calls."

I escorted him to the door, thanking him for his concern and assuring him that I would monitor Qui-Gon and he left to attend to his other duties.

After a quick check on Qui-Gon, I set to preparing our evening meal. Anakin came in soon after, speaking eagerly of his afternoon classes and reflection on my conversation with Master Jufa dissolved under his excitement. Happiness flowed from him as he told of an initiate who had befriended him and the pattern of our next couple of tens began.

The order of the days was almost identical and the three of us lost ourselves in the comfort of this regimented schedule. The next afternoon found a different healer attending to Qui-Gon's therapy as Master Jufa had been called off planet so the conversation about our bond never materialized. Qui-Gon soon could walk short distances without support and although I was satisfied with his progress, he was frustrated that things were going so slowly.

As much as I had grown to care for Anakin and was thrilled to see how he had flourished since Qui-Gon's return home, I found myself cherishing the private times Qui-Gon and I shared. We would spend a short time just after waking up sharing kisses and light caresses all from the comfort of each other's arms. Then it would be off to the refresher and a joint shower amid the rest of our morning ablutions. The shower chair was disposed of rather emphatically after a few days but Qui-Gon still allowed me the luxury of helping him wash. We would dress and Qui-Gon would move to his chair, usually to find Anakin waiting for him, still dressed in sleep pants but with glasses of juice in wait on the small table.

They would share some private time until first-meal was ready, then the three of us would settle in together, discussing a multitude of topics while we ate. Anakin would head off for class after helping me clean up and Qui-Gon and I would move to the common room. On a few of those mornings we played dejarik but most days one or another of his friends would come to visit. Depending on the time of their arrival, sometimes I would excuse myself to complete some chore but more often I would leave our quarters, heading down to the salles early to get in a workout of my own. The first couple times, I ran through katas alone, but as my routine was established others would show up and become my sparing partners.

I set up a routine with the dining hall and my commed order would be ready when Anakin and I came by after his practice. Afternoons were spent reading and doing class preparation before Qui-Gon's therapy. Return from class usually found him napping, so I would read, check the comm or just do chores until it was time to begin late-meal preparations. Anakin would join me when he came in from class, helping me until our Master emerged from the bedroom then gravitating to his side. This meal was just like the others - a time for pleasant conversation - and after clean up was completed the period until bedtime was a time for the three of us to share.

But bedtime was definitely my favorite time of the day. Qui-Gon would settle into bed and once Anakin had come in to say goodnight, I would strip and join him. We would lie facing each other, sharing kisses and light caresses until I could feel his fatigue overtaking him. Then I would turn in his arms and shift to lie against him, back to front as we had on his first night home. As it had that night, the feel of his breath against my neck, his heartbeat vibrating against my back and his skin against mine, offered me a depth of security that filled all the empty places within me. Unlike that first night, I kept my emotions in check, deflecting any return to that conversation about my need and worthiness. The comfort of his presence would make sleep come readily.

Only in the early hours of the mornings would any thought of my inner turmoil return. After the first few days of sleeping together, I began waking up aroused, which had not happened very often in recent tens. Since that horrendous day on Naboo, my own arousal had only resulted in spite of myself, during a couple of vivid dreams of erotic moments with Qui-Gon. Having Qui-Gon home with me now had allowed me to relax some and our kissing, caressing and touching was having the expected affect on me while his weakened state and the medications he was taking kept him from reacting likewise. Though it was becoming increasingly more difficult to quell those reactions, I refused to give in to my body's demands. Even the touch of my own hand felt wrong somehow, as if I was taking something that by pledge and love belonged only to Qui-Gon. My body would just have to be patient, for until Qui-Gon was ready it would remain without release.

This morning, I had been struggling to will my hardened flesh back to its non-aroused state when Qui-Gon began to wake. As he wrapped me more tightly against him, his arm slid down until his hand brushed over my erection and I groaned at the pleasurable touch. I tried to shift away from his touch but he was awakening quickly and wrapped his hand loosely around my erect penis and nuzzled my neck.

"Morning, love," he mumbled against my skin. "Happy to see me, I see," he added as his fingers teased over my taut flesh.

Embarrassment at my lack of control flooded into me and I pulled from his embrace. My erection deflated a bit in my discomfort as I turned to face him and I kissed him gently. "Good morning, yourself. How are you feeling this morning?" I added, trying to shift his attention from my physical state.

He kissed me, deeper and more passionately than I had kissed him, while reaching down between our bodies. When I pulled away again, he broke the kiss and looked at me with a distressed expression. "Obi-Wan?" he asked, his question easily conveyed with nothing more than my name.

Allowing all the love I felt for him to spill over the bond, I strengthened my shields so he couldn't feel my longing and tried to divert the topic by making light of it. "Don't worry, it will go away. It always does, eventually."

My words seemed to have the opposite effect and as his brow furrowed in concern, I wondered that my extra shielding may have come too late. "What do you mean, it always does? Though it has been a while, as I recall there is usually some action involved in abating an erection," he said flatly. When I didn't reply, he reached up and tilted my chin so our eyes locked and asked pointedly, "When is the last time you achieved sexual release, Obi-Wan?"

The hand on my chin and the distress in those beautiful blue eyes gave me no option but speaking the truth. "On the Queen's ship when we were coming back from Tatooine."

"That was over seven tens ago, almost two full cycles, for Sith's sake," he exclaimed in disbelief. "Why would you put yourself through that type of abjuration, Obi-Wan? And with no real reason. You know that there is no shame or taint in exercising self-pleasure."

"I know, but it just felt wrong somehow when I touched myself," I tried to explain. "And it wasn't like it would be forever - just until you're recovered."

"Oh, Obi-Wan," he admonished. "Your dedication to our love honors me but there was no need for you to do this and definitely no need for it to continue. I may not be physically able for us to make love but I am definitely recovered enough to do something about this."

With that said, he suited action to words and reached down to take my now semi-erect penis into his palm. I tried to pull back, to show him that I had control, but the touch of that longed for calloused hand on me was more than I could bear. I moaned softly as my newly awakened flesh leapt into his hand, hungry for the touch it had been denied for so long. He covered my mouth with his and I was lost; need, desire and longing washing over me in waves intertwined with the love I felt for him. In a matter of seconds, my climax exploded from me, my semen pulsing over his fist as he swallowed my cry of release.

He released my spent flesh and wrapped his arms around me. I tangled my hands into his hair and we kissed gently for a few moments while my heart rate and breathing returned to normal. With a playful nip at my lower lip, Qui-Gon released my mouth and gave me a wry smile. "I don't expect to find you denying yourself again, my Obi-Wan. Is that understood?"

Pushing back a twinge of guilt at my need for him, I felt my cheeks heat at his teasing order. "Yes, Master," I replied, as I buried my face against his neck. The movement made me more aware of the stickiness coating both our chests and I slid back with a chuckle. "Looks like our shower is definitely the next thing on the agenda."

He ran a finger through the fluid on my chest and sucked it into his mouth with a smirk. "Yes, I wouldn't want to have to explain the unique scent to our inquisitive padawan."

I couldn't stop the laugh that erupted from me at that thought and heartily agreed. "And this time it would be your turn, since I already had to discuss our sexual relationship with the boy."

Reluctantly, I rolled from his embrace, rose from the warmth of our bed and held out a hand to him. "Well, I guess it's time to start our day."

Our morning routine went much as it had since Qui-Gon came home, except that his lounging clothes were replaced with a full uniform and our normal leisure time after breakfast was replaced with a slow walk to Healer's Hall. Except for a few trips to the gardens in the hoverchair, this was Qui-Gon's first excursion from our quarters since coming home and he received friendly greetings from everyone we passed. I could feel his happiness at being back in the 'land of the living' as he would call it and I was relieved to find the veil of despondence that had shrouded him during his recovery thinning noticeably.

My own heart felt lighter than it had since the day we had been assigned the Naboo mission. As I waited while Qui-Gon stopped to speak with Master Koon, I wondered if our brief intimacy that morning was the reason for my newfound harmony. That thought both thrilled and appalled me - delight in the fact that Qui-Gon's touch and love could so easily center me and anguish in the knowledge that I needed him so desperately. The second thought overrode the first and I was again filled with despair that eventually someone would recognize this engulfing need and my failure would be complete. My inability to function as a full Knight of the Order would be revealed and I would disgrace my Master's teachings. Qui-Gon's mental voice pulled me from my disparaging thoughts. Obi-Wan, Plo is speaking to you.

I was filled with remorse at my lack of attention and bowed deeply to the two Masters. "My apologies, Master Koon, my Master. I should not have allowed my attention to wander. Please forgive me," I said sincerely, embarrassment coloring my cheeks.

"It's totally understandable, Obi-Wan. Two old men reminiscing does not make for a very enthralling conversation," Plo Koon remarked, amusement evident in his voice even through his breathing mask. "I was asking on young Skywalker. How is his training progressing?"

Thankful that I had not offended the powerful Master, I answered his question with a smile. "Anakin is adapting to life at the Temple and his studies very well." I gave Qui-Gon a wink and added. "If my Master is not too fatigued after his check up, he'll be watching our morning training session. He should be able to give you a more thorough evaluation of Anakin's progress after that."

"I'm certain Obi-Wan's appraisal of Anakin is accurate, though I must admit I look forward to seeing the results of his teaching talents first hand," Qui-Gon declared, his praise filling me with warmth. "If you're free, please join me and you can see for yourself," he added and I knew that the words were spoken mainly because of the Council's original decision not to train the boy.

With that comment, we left Master Koon and continued to Healer's Hall. A few more people stopped us to talk to Qui-Gon but we kept these conversations short as he was tiring. Finally, we arrived at the infirmary and were directed right into an examination room. The Padawan Healer tried to direct me to the waiting area but a look of disapproval from Qui-Gon had him leaving without another word.

Knowing that this examination would be comprehensive, Qui-Gon began to disrobe immediately. I helped him to remove his boots then folded each piece of clothing and set it aside as he handed it to me. After he had stripped to only his linens, he climbed carefully onto the table. I had just covered him with a thin blanket so he wouldn't become chilled when Master Jufa entered the room.

Seeing my Master already disrobed and awaiting his arrival, he chuckled. "Good morning, Qui-Gon, Obi-Wan. Your frequent visits to the infirmary have left you fully versed on our protocol, I see."

"It's just that this way, I can get out of here more quickly," Qui-Gon smirked. "No offense, Meniet, but the less time I can spend in this section of the Temple, the happier I'll be."

"But Qui-Gon, without you and your various apprentices, I would have to downsize my staff," Master Jufa shot back as he walked to the exam table.

As much as I hated to admit it, both of us had spent much more time than the average in these humble halls so I kept my silence at the Master Healer's teasing and watched as he began his silent examination of my Master. He tested everything - breathing rate, lung capacity, heart rate, reflexes, range of motion, muscle strength, skin elasticity, scar formation, and a bunch of other tests I had never seen done before.

It took almost a half hour before all the tests were completed and Master Jufa broke the silence. "You have made remarkable progress in the two tens since I last examined you, Qui-Gon. Your lung capacity has risen to ninety percent and your range of motion has improved almost as much." He glanced over at me then back at Qui-Gon and added. "It appears that sending you home under Obi-Wan's watchful eye was the best medicine we could have prescribed."

"Yes, Obi-Wan has always been very good at sensing exactly what I need," Qui-Gon replied, proudly.

I could see that my Master's choice of words had struck a chord with the Master Healer and he pulled up a stool and sat down at the head of the exam table. "That brings me back to a conversation I had with Obi-Wan before I was called off planet," he began, motioning me over to their side. "The connection that the two of you share is extremely strong, much deeper than the average Master/Padawan bond. I am curious as to how long it has been this way?"

Qui-Gon reached out to take my hand then directed his answer to Master Jufa. "Our original bond formed without any conscious effort on either of our parts and has continued to grow quite readily but I never considered its depth to be that unique. It is very potent but my own bond with Yoda was deep as were my bonds with my two previous apprentices," he added with a slight quiver and I knew his thoughts were dwelling on Xanatos.

"That may be so, but I feel that the depth of your bond far exceeds the average and I would like to examine your connection more fully if you would give your consent," the Healer replied.

"To what purpose?" Qui-Gon asked.

"Just a theory at this point," he answered vaguely, "but I will explain more after I inspect it. If you are willing, I would like to set up a time to do the assessment."

"What would that entail?" I inquired with a hint of trepidation.

"Nothing invasive, Obi-Wan," he assured. "It would be similar to the process a Master/Padawan pair undergoes when their bond is verified by the Council."

Qui-Gon turned and sent a wave of love and support over the bond as his eyes locked with mine. "It is your call, Obi-Wan. I'll abide by whatever you decide."

Part of me resented the Master Healer's interest in our bond but mostly I was intrigued that the connection that was the center of my life could be something exceptional even among the Order. "I'll agree to the appraisal for now, Master Jufa, but I would like to discuss it more with my Master before we set up a time."

"Just let me know when you decide, Obi-Wan," he said with a smile. "Now back to you, Qui-Gon. You have progressed to the point that I feel we can discontinue your daily therapy sessions." I looked between the Healer and my Master almost incredulously as he spoke, surprised that he would make such a sweeping statement. "I think your recovery will be best served at this point by allowing you back into the salles to work on some basic katas." Master Jufa looked at me and winked. "Under supervision of course, to ensure that you don't overexert yourself."

"I don't need a babysitter, Meniet," Qui-Gon retorted sarcastically.

"Don't worry, Master Jufa. I'll make sure that he doesn't overdo," I replied with a smile as if my Master hadn't even spoken while I tightened my fingers around the hand holding mine.

"Excellent," he answered. "Now I have other patients to see. Set up a time with the desk to come back in four days so I can recheck you." With that he disappeared through the door, leaving us alone again.

As I watched him redress, I voiced the concerns still floating in my mind. "Why do you think Master Jufa has such an interest in our bond, Master? Could there be some problem with it?"

He reached out and touched my arm. "If that were the case, he would have had another Healer check the bond when you two first spoke," he reassured. "Now, help me with my boots. Anakin should be arriving at the salles soon."

"Yes, and we want to get there before he does since he doesn't know that you're coming," I said.

Qui-Gon redressed and we made our way from Healer's Hall to the training area with a few minutes to spare. We moved into the salle that I had reserved, hanging our cloaks on the hooks by the door as we entered. The room had a small observation alcove at one end with comfortable chairs instead of the normal wooden bench and Qui-Gon and I had just reached it when the door opened again behind us.

Anakin came bounding into the room and stopped dead in the center when he saw Qui-Gon beside me. "Master Qui-Gon. What are you doing here?"

"If I recall correctly, you invited me to come and watch you a short time ago," Qui-Gon answered. "Have you rescinded that invitation?"

The words seemed to break his frozen stupor and he ran into our Master's outstretched arms. "No, I was just surprised to see you." He wrapped his short arms as far as they would go around the large frame and rested his head against Qui-Gon's tunic. "I'm so glad you're here," he whispered.

Qui-Gon ruffled the short blond locks in a gesture so familiar that for a split second my heart ached to see it directed to another. But I knew that nothing could affect what Qui-Gon and I shared and I had grown to care about Anakin a great deal during these past two cycles so I quickly dispelled the fear.

"As am I, Anakin," Qui-Gon said softly before stepping back out of the boy's embrace. "Now will you show me the Linead kata that you recently mastered?"

The smile that erupted on the boy's face could have lit a room. After running back to the door to hang his robe with ours, he moved back into the center of the room and bowed formally in our direction. He stood with his eyes closed for a moment and I could feel him drawing on the Force. When he was ready, he opened his eyes and began. His movements were fluid and controlled and he moved through the positions of the kata with more confidence than I had ever seen in him. He held the last pose for almost ten seconds then bowed formally to us once again.

"Well done, Padawan," Qui-Gon said as he walked slowly to where Anakin stood. "You must have put in many hours of practice to perform that kata so flawlessly. Have you begun working on the Toral?" When Anakin nodded, our Master moved to stand beside him. "Well, Master Jufa has suggested that I switch from therapy to some low impact katas for my daily exercise so I was hoping I could join you. May I?" he added with a smile.

"Yes," Anakin replied excitedly. I couldn't help but smile as he took a position about a meter away from Qui-Gon and set himself in the first position of the kata. I itched to go onto the floor and join them, to lose myself in the joys of the simple movement along side my Master but my responsibilities to them kept me where I was. Leaning against the side of the alcove, I set my attention fully on the two people before me, watching Anakin to make sure he was executing the motions properly and Qui-Gon to make sure that he was not overexerting himself.

The Tonal was not a very long kata, taking only about five minutes to complete at full speed. But by the time they had completed their half-speed version, I could feel Qui-Gon's fatigue. I grabbed a chair from the alcove and walked out to the floor carrying it. "I think that is enough for now, Master." I ignored the glare that he shot me and waited patiently until he seated himself. When he did, I turned my attention to Anakin. "You are making progress but there are still a few movements in this that you have not fully mastered. Let's begin again, half-speed."

Anakin bowed and began, getting through the first quarter of the routine without flaws or missteps. He was in the third position of the next section when I called," halt." I moved behind him so that I could direct his motions. "Your left arm needs to be behind your back like this and your right leg needs to be a bit further forward," I explained as I set him into the proper position. "Okay, again."

He went through the routine three more times but he faltered at the same set of movements each time. I could feel his frustration building so I opted for another instruction method. Moving to stand directly in front of him, I said supportively, "Ani, let's go through it together." I could feel his relief and gratitude as he nodded. We went through the routine jointly and I could feel him dividing his concentration between his movements and watching mine. He faltered slightly a couple of times but managed to correct his position quickly by looking at me.

We had almost reached the end of the routine when a mental wolf whistle came over the bond accompanied by the comment. I must say I am definitely enjoying the view from here. The unexpected tease caught me so off guard that I stumbled, barely catching myself before I broke form completely. The next comment was verbal. "See Ani, even Knights don't always go through the routines flawlessly."

I could see Anakin trying to hold back a chuckle. "None of us, Masters included, can be perfect all the time, Ani, nor should we expect to be," I reassured him. Especially when they have a wicked former Master trying to break their concentration, I sent back as I continued speaking to Anakin. "Want to run through it one more time?"

"Definitely, and I will get it right this time," Anakin replied confidently.

"As long as you do your best, Padawan," Qui-Gon and I said simultaneously, both of us laughing as we finished. "Well, at least I know that you listened to me some of the time, Obi-Wan," my Master said with a smile.

"I was always an obedient and cooperative padawan, following your instructions without question," I countered in a falsely affronted tone.

One elegant eyebrow rose as he asked with more than a touch of humor in his voice, "Are we recalling the same apprenticeship, Padawan? I seem to recall a number of occasions when my instructions went unheeded."

Before he could begin to list those times, I interrupted. "I'm sure Anakin isn't interested in hearing those boring tales."

Anakin was practically bouncing in place as he said, "Yes, I want to know about Obi-Wan when he was younger."

Tossing a half-glare at my Master, I said firmly, "Our training time is limited, so we need to focus. You and Master Qui-Gon will have to save the discussion of my youthful escapades for another time."

"Spoil sport," Qui-Gon scoffed and only the stern look I gave Anakin kept his laughter from erupting.

I was relived that Qui-Gon let it go and Anakin followed his lead, closing his eyes and refocusing his attention on the task at hand. We moved through the routine again at half-speed and I was pleased to see the new surety in the boy's movements. I stepped forward until I was before him and draped my arm across his shoulder. "Much better, Ani. It won't take you much time at all before you have the Tonal mastered and will be ready to learn the Syndam." After a quick check on Qui-Gon's physical state, I turned Anakin in the direction of the showers and instructed, "Meet us in the dining hall after your shower. If you hurry, we'll have time for a leisurely lunch before afternoon classes."

I had barely finished my sentence before he flew from the room and when I turned back to Qui-Gon, he was smiling fondly at me. "Anakin is progressing even more quickly than expected. You have done well with him, Obi-Wan." I basked in the pride and approval I could feel coming over our bond but was still surprised when he said, "Maybe he should become your Padawan?"

"I don't think so, Master," I replied when the shock of his words finally wore off. I cupped a bearded cheek in my palm and looked intently into his loving blue eyes. "There is no way I could teach him one tenth as well as you can. His raw talent is almost overwhelming at times and he needs the experience and patience that you can give him not to mention the genuine affection that grew so quickly between you." I leaned in and kissed his forehead then added, "Plus, he is apprenticed to Qui-Gon Jinn, the preeminent Master in the Order. With the prestige inherent in that, no Padawan in their right mind would give up that opportunity."

He mirrored my position, stroking my cheek as he countered, "I would think that having the gifted Knight who killed the Sith as your Master would have a prestige all its own."

Although I could feel his genuine pride in me at that accomplishment, the memory brought me no satisfaction. All I felt was guilt, that I had not been good enough, fast enough, and skilled enough to prevent Qui-Gon's injury. He must have sensed my train of thought because he admonished me firmly.

"I will have none of that, Obi-Wan. Your fortitude and dedication are the only reasons I am here today. You were an excellent Apprentice, are a skilled Knight and will be an outstanding Master."

"If you say so, Master," I acquiesced before pulling him to his feet as I changed the subject. "Now let's get out of here. If we don't get moving, Anakin will arrive at the dining hall before we do."

The trip from the training area to the dining hall took a bit longer than I expected. As much as he didn't want to admit it, Qui-Gon was tired from his exercise and he walked at a much slower pace than his long stride usually kept. That, combined with the couple of times people stopped us in the hallways, had Anakin catching up with us as we reached the doors. A few of his classmates waved to him as we entered, so I said, "You may go and join your friends if you would like, Ani."

"No, I would rather have mid-meal with you and Master Qui-Gon," he replied. He looked up at our Master then back at me, adding shyly after a moment, "Unless you would rather be alone."

Placing an arm around his shoulder, I reassured him, "I wouldn't have suggested it if we didn't want you to join us." Seeing his classmates looking over at Anakin with a mixture of awe and envy, I remembered how much I had enjoyed being in the public portions of the Temple at Qui-Gon's side in the early days of my apprenticeship. I suddenly realized that although the three of us had spent many private hours together, this would be the first time Anakin could take his rightful place at his Master's side in public and as such he deserved to do so on his own. Keeping the smile in my heart from crossing my face, I pointed to a table across the room and instructed seriously, "It is a Padawan's duty to care for his Master. Why don't you escort Master Qui-Gon to that table, find out what he would like for mid-meal and meet me in the serving line?"

Delight shone in his young face as he replied earnestly, "Yes, Obi-Wan."

As I watched them make their way across the room, in a path that not surprisingly took them directly passed Anakin's friends, I remembered my own rocky start and insecurities when I began my life as Qui-Gon's apprentice and I vowed silently to do all in my power to ensure that Anakin would not suffer from those same doubts. I realized my silent vow had been shared when an affectionate voice echoed in my mind. You are a caring and compassionate man, Obi-Wan Kenobi, and I thank the Force everyday for continuing to hammer at me when I was too stubborn to see what was meant to be. Although our partnership has not been without rough spots, the joy and love you have brought to my life is something I could never have imagined possible. Thank you for not giving up on me, my own.

Basking in the love and devotion that accompanied those mental words, it took all my control to suppress the tears that were trying to fall. I sent a silent wave of love in return, the overload to my still too erratic emotions not allowing me to send a mental response. With a deep breath, I turned away from the sight of them arriving at the table and made my way to the serving line, thanking the Force for the millionth time in the past two cycles for the gift of Qui-Gon's survival.

I had regained my composure by the time Anakin joined me. He smiled at me as he studied the various offerings laid out, then turned to me with a look of confusion on his face. Before I could say anything he muttered, "Nothing is labeled. Obi-Wan, what are torinelios?"

I swallowed the chuckle that tried to escape at the look of confusion on the boy's face as he studied the more exotic offerings on the serving table. I pointed to a tray filled with small, filled pastry pockets covered with a bluish sauce. "Those are torinelios and unless you enjoy foods that are hot enough to blister your throat going down, I would suggest you steer away from them." Looking at the assortment of foods stuffs, I motioned towards a large bowl filled with assorted leafy vegetables tossed in a tangy dressing. "A bowl of nianee salad and some caretta stalks would be a good compliment to the torinelios, not to mention a full pitcher of iced water."

Resolving to give Anakin a crash course in the foods our Master preferred sometime soon, I filled my own tray while he gathered the suggested items on a tray for Qui-Gon. I added the pitcher of water and two mugs of tea to my tray to allow him room to place his own selections on the tray. Each carrying our tray, we left the serving line and headed back to the table where Qui-Gon was deep in conversation with Mace Windu.

"Afternoon Knight Kenobi, Padawan Skywalker," Mace greeted politely.

Anakin and I both tipped our heads in a slight bow as we placed our trays on the table. "Good afternoon Master Windu," I replied. "Nice to see that your Council duties allow you time for nourishment and a bit of socializing."

"Not as much time as I would like," Mace replied with a smile. "But in this case I can mix pleasure with business. Qui-Gon was just telling me that Master Jufa evaluated him this morning and feels he has made great strides."

"Yes, he is getting stronger each day," I said. "Hopefully, he will be back at full strength very soon."

"He is right here," Qui-Gon huffed as he removed the items from the tray Anakin had placed in front of him.

Mace continued as if Qui-Gon had not spoken. "This news could not have come at a better time as a mission has come up this morning that needs to be attended to immediately. And the improvement in Qui-Gon's health will allow us to assign the mission to someone who can leave almost immediately." He reached for the datapad that sat on the edge of the table and handed it to me. "Here is your first official solo assignment, Knight Kenobi. Review the mission parameters and see me in my office after your class."

My mind was a whirl of conflicting emotions as the pad settled into my palm. A small part of me was thrilled at this assignment, the first mission as a Knight being the culmination of twelve years of intense training and sacrifice. But most of me was panicked at the thought of leaving Qui-Gon's side. While it was true that he had made outstanding progress, he was still a long way from full recovery. My shock and conflict must have been apparent because Mace spared a glance at Qui-Gon then looked intently back at me, not giving me a chance to say anything. "I'm late for a meeting. I will see you at 1530 in my office," he ordered then headed from the room at a quick pace.

I dropped into the seat across from Qui-Gon with a heavy sigh. "I can't believe the Council is assigning me this mission. There must be someone else on Coruscant that they can send."

Qui-Gon looked back at me, wearing the patient teacher expression that he had worn so often during my apprenticeship. "You don't even know what the mission is, Obi-Wan."

"It doesn't matter what it is," I retorted. "I need to be here with you, overseeing your recovery, not off who knows where, for who knows how long. You are not ready to be alone."

"There is a Temple full of Healers who can oversee my recovery, Obi-Wan," he assured. "Plus I won't be alone. Anakin will be with me."

"I am his Padawan. As you said a few minutes ago, it is my responsibility to take care of Master Qui-Gon," Anakin declared, looking a bit hurt. "You can trust me to look after him, Obi-Wan."

I shifted my gaze to the young boy who now sat beside Qui-Gon, seeing the insecurity my carelessly chosen words had again caused him. "I do trust you to take care of our Master, Anakin. Never doubt that," I reassured. "It's just after all that has happened I don't like the idea of being away from the Temple at this point."

Before Anakin or I could say anything further, Qui-Gon motioned across the room and said, "Master Koon is heading in our direction so I would suggest we curtail this conversation for the time being."

So the topic was set aside as Master Koon reached the table and began a conversation with Qui-Gon. I attempted to eat my meal while I listened to them talk but the thought of actually leaving the Temple at this time was making me feel physically ill. My discomfort must have been obvious because I received a gentle mental reproach. Don't center on your anxieties, Obi-Wan.

Sorry, Master, I sent in apology before strengthening my shields. Why was I having such a difficult time with any thought of being separated from Qui-Gon? I had spent my entire life preparing for the eventuality of serving the Order as a Jedi Knight and suddenly I was balking at that idea. Was my character so weak that I was unable to stand on my own?

I must have been lost in my own thoughts for quite some time before the sound of a chair being pushed back caught my attention and I looked up to see Anakin gathering his and Qui-Gon's empty trays. "Time for class. I'll see you later," he said as he left the table.

"If you're done playing with your food, Obi-Wan, I would suggest we head back to our quarters," he chided fondly.

Embarrassment colored my cheeks as I looked down at the messy remnants of what had been my meal. Gathering the items onto the tray, I stood up. "Yes, I think that would be best." After dumping the uneaten food down the recycler, I placed the dishes into their receptacle and we headed from the dining hall.

The trip was completed in relative silence and I was glad for the reprieve in discussing my reactions. There were a few new messages on the comm unit so Qui-Gon sat down and dealt with those while I headed into our room to gather up my materials for the class I was teaching this afternoon.

When I returned to the common room, he was seated on the couch and patted the space next to him in invitation. I settled into the seat readily but did not say anything so he finally prodded gently. "Do you want to talk about it?"

His sympathetic tone seemed to galvanize me into speech but not in the way Qui-Gon or I quite expected. "Talk about what? The fact that I am acting like a six-year old initiate afraid of the dark rather than the twenty-five year old Knight that I am supposed to be?" The words seemed to fly out of me without conscious effort, surprising us both. "What is wrong with me, Master? Why am I so fearful of setting out on my own that I feel physically ill at the prospect?"

"Are you certain it is fear, Obi-Wan?" he queried in his instructor tone. "Could there be some other reason for this reaction?" When I didn't answer, he suggested, "Maybe you should spend some time mediating on your reactions?"

After regaining a modicum of self-control, I leaned in to kiss him gently, pouring all the love I felt for him into the melding of our lips. When I pulled back, I looked up at the chrono and said, "I think that would be a good idea. I have a little time before class so if you have no objections, I think I'll head to the rock garden." He nodded his agreement and, slinging my backpack over my shoulder, I left our quarters.

I pulled my hood up for my trek through the Temple halls, knowing that all I passed would heed the common sign for privacy. The small area was tucked away into a remote corner of the Temple gardens and I was pleased to note that there was no one else in the immediate vicinity. I dropped to my knees on the padded mat that was embedded into the rocky ground and pulled the rock that had been Qui-Gon's gift to me on my thirteenth name-day from the pouch on my belt. Wrapping my fingers around this cherished memento of my childhood, I closed my eyes and, after setting my internal time sense to rouse me in time for class, I opened my mind fully to the comforting presence of the Force.

I came out of my meditation feeling much calmer but no closer to finding an answer to my unusual state of mind. I had examined my feelings from every angle but had been unable to decipher their cause. Every fiber of my being still shouted that I should not be leaving Coruscant - or more specifically Qui-Gon - at this time but I could not figure out why I was feeling so strongly about it. It was like I was missing an integral clue and until I found it the puzzle would remain unsolved.

I rose from the mat, tucked my rock back into the pouch on my belt, straightened my tunics and robe and headed to the teaching wing. I reached the room only a few seconds before class was due to start and I could feel my students' surprise that I was arriving so much later than my norm. I greeted the group, then moved to my desk and began rummaging through my pack. With my turbulent mental state, I was relieved that I had already scheduled an exam for today and would not have to present a lecture. After retrieving the datachips with the test questions, I passed them out to everyone then sat down behind the desk. "You have sixty minutes to complete your exam. The last fifteen minutes of class will be for questions. Anyone who is finished before the allotted time can turn in their datachips and leave the room quietly. Just be sure you return by 1500. Any questions?" When no one spoke, I ordered, "Begin."

Only after all my students were settled at their task did I retrieve the datapad Mace had given me from the pack. Knowing that I could not go into the meeting with Mace unprepared, I keyed on the pad and started reading the mission parameters. The briefing itself was very short reading. The mission was cut and dried, witnessing a treaty signing between the two cultures on the planet Ansion. The two diverse cultures had lived in peace under some form this basic treaty for over two hundred years, sharing knowledge and resources freely between them as they kept their distinctiveness. Following a tradition that had existed as long as the peace between them, they had requested a Jedi representative to witness this formality, which occurred every quarter century.

Ansion was about a five hour hyperspace journey from Coruscant and with the schedule detailed on the pad, the entire mission would only require that I be away about thirty-six hours. The thought that I would be gone for such a short time should have reassured me but the dread inhabiting the pit of my stomach remained firmly entrenched. What was the Force trying to tell me that I could not see and how could I find a way to be excused from this mission?

I spent the rest of the test period considering those two points. Qui-Gon's earlier words came back to me. Could this unease I was feeling be a sign from the Force of impending problems or was I just allowing my own personal feelings to overshadow my duty? Was this anxiety a sign that I was not capable of performing the duties I had trained so long for or something else? The answer to those questions remained elusive and frustration rose in me at this additional failing. So I continued to wrestle with the questions as my students worked while simultaneously trying to come up with arguments that would sway the Council's decision that I should be the one to go off on this mission.

I remained deep in thought on these issues throughout the test time, keeping only a tiny portion of my attention on the occupants of the classroom. A few people turned in the datachips early but most were still working when the hour was up. "You have two minutes left. Complete the question you are on then bring your completed tests up to me," I instructed. I smiled at the groans of protest as they came forward one at a time, remembering when I had been an Initiate sitting in their seats.

When the last test datachip had been turned in and everyone was back in their seats, I opened the floor to questions. The depth of the material had tasked them sufficiently so not many questions came to mind right away. Knowing I needed to address my possible absence the following two days in case I couldn't sway Mace, I explained. "As of this moment, it looks like I will be going on a mission for the next couple of days. If the curriculum Master does not assign someone else to take the class in my absence, I would like you to spend the class periods down in the library working on your projects. Also I would like you to read the next chapter in the text to be prepared for my next lecture. Any questions?"

Six hands rose at once. "Where are you going? What is the mission? Is it dangerous? Will you have to fight?" They all blurted out questions together, suddenly very interested in the new topic.

"Nothing very exciting, I'm afraid," I replied with a smile. "I am just witnessing a treaty signing on Ansion."

"I can't wait till I'm a padawan and get to go on missions," a voice from the back of the room lamented. Another voice queried meekly, "Is Anakin going with you?"

"You'll all get your turn," I said confidently in reply to the first question, but I could sympathize with their years of working so hard for their goal only to have to endure the uncertainty of choosing day. And their possible resentment of someone who had been given what they strived for without going through what they had. So I chose my words carefully when I answered the second. "And no, Anakin will not be accompanying me. I am only overseeing his training for the time being, I am not his Master." The students in my class were all a couple years older than Anakin so I decided to play on that fact as I continued. "Plus he is only nine, so I would expect that most of you will have been on your first mission long before he goes on his." That seemed to satisfy them and after a few more quick questions, I dismissed the class.

I gathered everything into my backpack and left the room for the quick walk to Mace's office. When I arrived, his aide directed me to enter. "Master Windu is waiting for you, Knight Kenobi."

I entered the office that I had been in way too often in the last few tens and bowed formally. "You wanted me to report to you at 1530, Master Windu."

"No need for all that formality, Obi-Wan. Please take a seat," he said with a smile. "I'm sure you have already read through the mission parameters with your normal meticulousness."

"Yes, I have read through them, " I responded courteously but somewhat coldly.

Mace seemed not to notice the tone because he continued easily. "So can you be ready to depart tonight? I have a transport scheduled for 2100."

I decided that the only way to deal with this was to jump right in so I said politely but firmly, "With all due respect, Master Windu, I do not think that it would be wise for me to leave the Temple at this point in time. Maybe in another ten, when my Master has regained more of his stamina I could accept a mission but for now I feel he still needs someone here to oversee his recovery." I looked at him and tried to smile, "I'm sure there is someone else you can send on this mission."

"I confirmed what Qui-Gon told me earlier with Master Jufa," Mace countered. "He feels that there would be no detriment to Qui-Gon's health if you were away for a couple of days." He leaned his elbows on the desk in front of him, steepling his fingers and looking at me intently. "Or is there some other reason that you do not want to accept this mission, Knight Kenobi?"

Not wanting to divulge the depth of my anxiety about leaving, I took time to choose my words very carefully. "Nothing concrete that I can put into words, Master Windu." I admitted reluctantly after a few moments of tense silence. "It just feels wrong."

A hint of humor touched Mace's eyes as he said, "And you have been well schooled in the concept of 'trusting your feelings' haven't you, Obi-Wan."

"It is a Jedi philosophy that I have heard repeatedly throughout my life," I replied with a tight smile.

"Have you discussed your concerns with Qui-Gon?" he asked.

"Of course. He suggested that I meditate on it which I have done without much success," I stated flatly.

Mace's expression softened a bit as he remarked, "I understand your concern for Qui-Gon, especially after what he has been through, but you need to move forward and take your rightful place as a Knight of the Order. And this mission is your first step on that path."

Mace had said it with an almost fatherly concern but there was no doubt in my mind that what he had given me was a direct order. Knowing that any further arguments would just be dismissed while reflecting badly on me and my training, I rose from my seat and bowed formally. "I will complete my assigned duties in a manner befitting my station. May the Force be with you, Master Windu."

"May the Force be with you as well, Knight Kenobi," Mace replied. "I look forward to hearing all about the experience when you return home."

I bowed again then left the small office and headed back to our quarters without delay. I not only had a few things to take care of before my departure but also wanted to spend every minute I possibly could with Qui-Gon before I had to leave.

When I palmed open the door, Qui-Gon was seated on a high stool at the kitchen counter working with Anakin to create late-meal. "Something smells good," I called out as I entered.

"Master Qui-Gon is teaching me to make venoita nokita and kolean sprouts," Anakin said enthusiastically.

"To what do I owe the honor of you preparing my favorite meal?" I asked, breathing in the wonderful aroma as I entered the kitchen.

Qui-Gon chuckled as he replied, "We can't have you going off on your first official mission as a Knight without at least a small celebratory dinner."

"How did you know? Did Mace call you?" I asked, a bit surprised.

"He didn't have to," he replied. "I know Mace well enough to know when he is set on a decision and today in the dining hall was one of those times." A warm wash of love and affection came over our bond as he added silently, Plus, I could feel your resignation as you approached.

Sorry, I sent meekly, distraught that I had been so transparent in my distress.

Stop that, he chided mentally. Do you think this heightened bond only works one way?

Honestly I never thought about it, I admitted but before Qui-Gon could comment on that Anakin was asking him what to do next.

I took the opportunity provided by Anakin's request for assistance to evade the conversation at least for the moment. "If you two don't need any help, I'll get my bags packed while you make late-meal."

That comment caught Anakin's attention and he asked, "When are you leaving, Obi-Wan?"

"My transport is scheduled to depart at 2100," I replied. Without waiting for any additional comments, I picked up my backpack and left the kitchen.

I blew out a heavy sigh as the bedroom door closed behind me. Although I had resigned myself intellectually to the mission, emotionally I was still in turmoil about leaving. As I pulled my travel bag from the bottom of the closet, I shuddered violently, my mind reeling with the realization that the last time I had used it had been on the mission to Naboo. Forcing back the images the thought created, I tossed the bag on the bed and moved to the wardrobe.

It did not take me very long to gather up the items I would need for this short trip and within minutes I had them stacked on the bed. I settled my uniforms, toiletries and personal datapad into the bag then grabbed my backpack to retrieve a few more items. After tossing the mission datapad and my class materials haphazardly into the bag, I unzipped the inner pocket of the bag, which would be a more protective place to store the students' exam chips. Placing the fragile chips into the pocket, my fingertips brushed against something already inside. As my fingers closed around the object, memories of the hours before the final battle on Naboo flooded my mind.

~~~~While waiting for the scouts to come back from Theed, Qui-Gon had headed away from where Amidala's people were congregated, moving deeper into the forest and I had followed a few meters behind. Our first few moments had been awkward, the sting of our harsh words on the landing pad hanging in the air between us. Luckily love had overcome our pride and we had released our hurt amid our simultaneous apologies.

Moving a bit further into the forest, we had settled on the ground near the edge of the lake that concealed Otoh Gunga. As we sat, just taking comfort in being together, I ran my hand absently through the water, picking up stones and skimming them across the surface of the lake. I had done that a few times when I picked up a stone that felt different than the others. Looking down into my palm, I saw I was holding a piece of coral. Exquisitely striated with various shades of blue, the small chunk had been weathered as smooth as glass from the years of water erosion. The combination of colors in the unique piece reminded me of Qui-Gon's eyes during various moments of passion and I knew that I had to keep it.

"Another rock for your collection, Padawan?" Qui-Gon had chuckled as he looked at the item in my palm. "Can never have enough rocks, Master," I had replied, basking in the love that accompanied the comment. Tucking the wonderful treasure into the pocket of my cloak, I had returned my attention to the man seated beside me.~~~~

I was still standing with the blue stone in my hand, lost in the memory when the sound of Qui-Gon's voice brought me back to the present. "Obi-Wan," he called out, his concern for me evident in his voice.

Holding out my palm so he could see what it held, I smiled weakly. "I had forgotten all about this."

He reached out and ran his fingertips across the smoothed coral then looked at me as if an idea had just come to him. "Do you think that what occurred on Naboo is the reason you are so unsettled about leaving me?" My incredulity at that obvious statement must have shown on my face because he amended. "I don't mean just my injury, love. You had vague feelings of apprehension from the onset of the mission, prescient feelings that I dismissed without letting you explore them fully." He closed his hand over mine, trapping the stone I held between us. "Could this be the reason that you are so anxious about your vague feelings now, that what happened on Naboo is coloring and intensifying your reactions?"

Basking in the reassurance of the gesture as he held my hand, I opened myself fully to the Force and tested the verity of his words. "I guess that could be part of it," I admitted reluctantly after a moment, not entirely sure that I believed it.

"Search your feelings, Obi-Wan," he cautioned gently. "You know that you are always much more concerned for my welfare than for your own, so I'm sure your apprehension revolves around my well being. But in this you do not need to be concerned for me. I am recovering steadily and will remain within the confines of the Temple while you are away with a multitude of people, including Healers, available if I should need them."

I placed my other hand on top of our joined ones and said, "I wish I could explain. None of my meditations have given me any real insight but my anxiety still remains. It just feels wrong to be leaving, even if it's just for a couple of days."

I could see his look of surprise at that last part of my comment and I realized I hadn't even told him about the mission. Leaning in, I kissed him gently before directing him to the door. "Dwelling on my anxieties serves no purpose as you have so often reminded me over the years. Let's join Anakin and I'll tell you both about my mission." He looked at me questioningly for a moment, then nodded his agreement and together we returned to the kitchen.

Qui-Gon settled back onto the stool beside the counter as I poured us each a mug of tea before moving to lean on the counter beside him. "So tell us about your mission," he prodded as he wrapped his hand around his mug.

"It's nothing very exciting, unlike the majority of the missions we were assigned," I chuckled, noting that Anakin was now giving me his full attention. "I'm being sent to Ansion to oversee a treaty signing. Some version of treaty between the two major races inhabiting the planet has been in place for over two hundred years so my presence is mainly ceremonial."

"How much research have you done on the mission, Obi-Wan?" Qui-Gon asked with a smile.

"I have only read the mission briefing that Master Windu gave me," I replied. "I figured I would have plenty of time for that while I was enroute to Ansion. Why?"

"It seems the Force or maybe more realistically the Council perseveres in binding the events in our lives together, Padawan," he explained. "I was the Jedi representative for the last treaty signing twenty-five years ago."

"Wonderful. My first solo mission and I get to walk in the footsteps of the infamous Qui-Gon Jinn," I said impishly.

The more things change, the more they stay the same, my own, he sent lovingly before saying, "The Lorei and the Niatchie are two very different cultures with some very unique ideas, sharing a beautiful and resource laden planet. This mission will give you an opportunity to put all your negotiation training to good use."

"I thought this treaty signing was just a formality," I remarked flatly.

"It is but the Lorei and the Niatchie do enjoy the art of debate so the gatherings leading up to the actual signing are usually very energetic," he replied.

"Well, it won't be anything I'm not used to after spending so many years at your side," I said.

"True enough," he chuckled. He had been helping Anakin with the final touches on our meal and he rose from his seat when the timer beeped. "Late-meal is ready. Let's relocate to the dining alcove and eat."

Each of us grabbing a couple of dishes, we moved into the dining area and settled into our traditional places at the table. Anakin took his role as host for the meal very seriously, placing generous helpings of each item on our plates before taking his own chair.

Tasting the first bite of venoita from my plate, I savored the tasty morsel as Anakin watched intently for my reactions. I smiled appreciatively, swallowed and said, "This is excellent, Anakin. Thank you both so much for going to all this trouble."

Anakin beamed under the compliment while Qui-Gon just smiled and we all settled in to enjoy the meal. Anakin was full of questions both about my upcoming mission and about the missions our Master and I had gone on over the years. He listened totally enthralled while Qui-Gon relayed the details of some of our more eventful missions. I found myself in a constant state of either laughter or blush as the various tales unfolded. But even in my embarrassment, the comfort of talking about these shared times was a balm to my soul, which I drank in and stored for the lonely days ahead.

We cleared up from the meal together, Qui-Gon still filling Anakin with details of some of my most embarrassing moments as an apprentice. After putting the last platter away in the cupboard, Anakin excused himself with a warm smile. "I have some classwork that I need to finish for the morning so I will be in my room. Please call me when you are ready to leave for the hangar. I would like to see you off, if that is okay," he added shyly.

"You don't need to do that," I began but Qui-Gon stopped me.

"There is no way you are leaving for your first mission without a proper send off so we will be accompanying you to the hangar," he declared in a tone that brooked no argument.

I threw my arms up in surrender as I replied. "Okay, okay. There is no chance of me winning this argument so I will surrender gracefully." Qui-Gon looked back at me with a knowing smile and Anakin chuckled but kindly did not comment further before disappearing into his bedroom.

"So how would you like to spend the time before you depart?" he asked as the door to Anakin's room slid shut.

I smothered my mind and body's automatic reaction to that query and answered softly, "With you."

He cupped my cheek in his palm in a tender gesture that almost undid my control as he replied, "There is no place that I would rather be."

Not wanting our limited amount of private time to be interrupted, I grasped his free hand and led him into our bedroom. I took my duffel from the bed, dropped it on the floor and directed him to sit on the edge of the bed. I pulled off his boots and placed his saber on the table by the bed then did the same for myself. Still dressed in tunics and leggings, he stretched out atop the covers and held out his arms to me. My heart leapt at the sight of him beckoning and I went willingly into his arms, clothed as well.

Although his lingering injuries and the medication he was still taking did not allow the more intimate contact of full lovemaking that we both wanted, just lying against his chest, the sound of his heartbeat echoing in my ear, helped to soothe the ache within me. Soon just lying in his arms wasn't enough so I slid and covered his mouth with mine. We shared sweet, gentle kisses for a time and I couldn't suppress a moan of pleasure when Qui-Gon's tongue slid past my lips to taste and map the inside of my mouth.

When his tongue retreated, mine followed and I explored his mouth as thoroughly as he had explored mine. By the time I pulled back, we were both breathing heavily and I was fully aroused. I shifted slightly in his arms and was surprised to feel his semi-hard penis pressing against my thigh. I rocked against him before meeting his gaze, my surprise plainly evident of my face and he answered my unspoken question.

"You are temptation incarnate, my own," he said huskily as he pressed against me. "Having you in my arms is enough to countermand the remnants of the drugs in my system."

"Remnants?" I asked in confusion.

"Yes, remnants. Master Jufa called while you were at class," he explained. "The infection in my lungs is almost fully cleared so I no longer need to take the induleunt. He feels it should be purged completely from my system in the next forty-eight hours."

"Figures," I groaned. "Just as I am being sent off planet."

He lifted my chin and kissed me deeply before saying, "Consider it an incentive to get the treaty on Ansion signed as quickly as possible."

I reached down and rubbed my palm between his legs and growled. "As if I need an incentive."

He reached down and mimicked my motions, stroking me firmly through the fabric of my leggings as he kissed me again. After a few moments, the combination of the touch of his hand and his kisses were more than I could handle in my current state and I came into the fabric of my leggings like a randy adolescent.

"No, I guess you don't," he chuckled as he released my lips and pulled me into a tight embrace. "Nice to know that this old man can have as strong an effect on you as your nubile, young form has on me," he whispered huskily into my hair.

As if there was ever any doubt of how your love affects me, I sent in reply, too spent to find the energy to speak.

I lay there for a time, content and sated in his arms before the wet fabric against my skin started to become uncomfortable. As I shifted, the time displayed on the chrono by the bed brought me fully from my relaxed state. "I have just enough time to shower and change before I have to leave," I said, rolling reluctantly from Qui-Gon's arms to sit on the edge of the bed.

"You can always use the sonics on the ship," he teased, knowing how much I hated those.

"If it's even large enough to have sonics," I countered. "No thanks. Plus, this may be my last chance for a leisurely shower for at least a few days." I looked at him seductively. "Care to join me?"

"We definitely don't have enough time for a leisurely shower for two, my own," he replied with a hint of longing in his voice. "You go on and I'll get a set of clean uniforms out for you."

With a quick kiss, I pushed up off the bed and headed to the refresher. Setting my belt aside, I stripped quickly, tossed my clothing down the laundry chute and stepped into the shower stall. The hot spray felt wonderful against my skin and I stood for a number of minutes just enjoying the sensation while I cleared my mind.

I must have been truly lost in the moment because the next thing I knew Qui-Gon's voice echoed in from the bedroom. "Did you drown in there, Padawan?"

"No, Master," I called over the sound of the water. "I'll be right out." I took a moment to wash myself, stepped from the shower, dried off quickly and grabbed my belt before heading back into the bedroom.

The hungry gaze that he swept over my naked body as he leaned against the door, renewed the lust and longing he had just quenched and I grumbled, "Don't look at me like that unless you plan on doing something about it."

He stalked over and kissed me passionately before whispering against my lips, "Soon, my Obi-Wan, soon."

"Not soon enough," I mumbled as I stepped back to dress. Ignoring the pull of the lust-filled stare of my lover, I concentrated on getting into my clothing. Within a couple of minutes, I was fully dressed. I noticed that Qui-Gon had put his boots back on, so I handed him his lightsaber, clipped mine to my belt and picked up my duffel bag from the floor. "We should get Anakin and be off," I said with more enthusiasm than I felt. "It wouldn't look very good for me to be late for my first mission."

Anakin was waiting in the common room when we entered, cloak already on and holding both of ours. I helped Qui-Gon into his, threw mine on, settled my bag over my shoulder and headed us out the door. The walk to the hangar seemed to take much less time than normal but I'm sure that was due to my remaining trepidation about leaving. When we arrived at the hangar, the ship's pilot had already finished his preflight checks and was waiting with the ship's systems cycled to standby.

I drew on the Force for calm then knelt and instructed Anakin, "Responsibility for Master Qui-Gon's care falls to you now, Anakin. I know you will take the duty seriously. Do not hesitate to contact Master Jufa if you feel the need. And do not let him bully you, Padawan. If you feel he is overdoing it, he probably is," I added with a smile. I could feel Qui-Gon glaring at me but I ignored it, focusing my full attention on the boy before me.

"I will, Obi-Wan," he replied earnestly, before leaning in for a hug. "Have a good trip."

I returned the hug then rose to my feet and turned to face Qui-Gon. "Behave yourself while I am away, my Master," I teased hoping humor would help cover my surging emotions.

He ignored the statement and lifted my chin so our eyes locked. "This is a step that you are more than ready to take, Obi-Wan. I know you will do both yourself and the Order proud." He slid his hand from my chin to the place behind my ear where my braid used to begin, caressing gently with his fingertips.

I leaned into the touch as I replied, "If I do, it will be due to the quality of your teachings, my Master," I said softly, fighting to keep my voice from cracking.

He leaned in and kissed me gently. "May the Force be with you, my Padawan."

I smiled weakly at the ritual salutation, not surprised that my somewhat rebellious Master would fall back on ceremony to send me off on my own this first time. "And with you, my Master. Be well." I ran my fingertips over his cheek and continued our farewell silently. Hopefully, I will live up to your faith in me. I love you, Qui-Gon, I sent before turning and heading up the open ramp.

I know you will. Hurry back to me, my own, he sent as the ramp closed behind me.

The wave of love and longing that accompanied his words made me realize that he was as affected by our separation as I was, just doing a much better job of handling it. Stoic Jedi Master, indeed, I returned teasingly along my own wave of love. A chuff of humor came in reply as I reached the cockpit.