Master Apprentice  Archive Better Not To Know |
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Rating: PG
Category: It's supposed to be be funny, so Humor. Q/O
Disclaimer: I don't own the boyz, Lucas has 'em, but whew mama, he sure dunno what to do with 'em.
Archive: master_apprentice
Summary: A Jedi's got a dirty little secret. Response to "Qui-Gon Jinn locked himself in the bathroom" challenge.
Feedback: Yes, please, hit me baby one more time.
Notes: Heaven help us all, Telanu's challenge attacked with a vengeance. Inspired by what *I* do in the bathroom. *snerk*
This is totally unbeta'ed and unedited, written in about fifteen minutes. Proceed at own risk.
Things enclosed in [] are what Obi-Wan is reading.
Qui-Gon Jinn locked himself in the bathroom. At first, Obi-Wan wasn't worried...his master had often spent hours in there, doing who knew what. Whenever Obi-Wan had asked him why he'd spent so much time in there, he'd gotten an embarassed glance, and a muttered "reading magazines..." Right. How come Obi-Wan never got to see the magazines Qui-Gon was reading?
But now, Qui-Gon had been in the bathroom for, oh, six hours, and Obi-Wan was starting to get a little worried. Even "Vanity Fair" didn't take *that* long to read.
Uncertain of whether this was the right thing to do or not, Obi-Wan hesitantly knocked on the door.
A muttered "just a minute, Padawan," was all he heard. Sighing loudly, so as to give the impression that he Really Could Not Wait Much Longer, he stood patiently outside the bathroom door.
There was a distinct rustle of paper, and a cabinet door slammed shut. Water ran for a moment, then Qui-Gon came out and departed into his own room, cursorily glancing at Obi-Wan, who was hopping back and forth, not from any particular need, but merely to give the impression that certain needs existed.
Obi-Wan ducked into the bathroom the minute Qui-Gon's door shut behind him, and opened the under-the-sink bathroom cabinet. Underneath rolls of toilet paper, unopened shampoo bottles, and stray candy wrappers, he found what he was looking for.
It was no magazine, it was a stack of paper, several inches high, obviously printed from the holonet.
Obi-Wan turned over a few pages, and blushed bright red.
["I love you, Master, desperately," he sighed, tossing a well-muscled arm over his master's stomach. "Please can we do it again? Forever?"]
Obi-Wan dropped the stack of paper like it was on fire. Erm, this was what Qui-Gon was reading? This, this *erotica*? This utter absolute--he glanced down, reading a bit farther on. ["Oh, my padawan, let me take you in every way...let me be your moon and stars." The padawan moaned softly and kissed his master deeply...]--, ahhh, intriguing, *trash*?
Obi-Wan shoved the stack of paper back under the sink. There were some things about his master that it was better not to know.