Summary: With Qui-Gon forbidden by the Council to see Obi-Wan,
and Obi-Wan off on a mission with Daen, thinking that Qui-Gon
has rejected him, could our intrepid duo really overcome the
odds to be together?
Read below for the story so far unless you want to search the
archive & read the five stories that precede this
one…..
Feedback: Well, you don't have to, but I'd certainly appreciate
it if you did.
Series: (1) The Lie, (2) Daen, (3) Bear the Consequences, (4)
Aftermath, (5) Misdirection, (6) All I Wanted to Say
Thank You: As always, I had some excellent beta readers on this
story. K.G often seems way more up on the series than I am
myself, and picked out a number of glaring continuity errors
that would have confused the hell out of everyone. She is
possessed of both an excellent memory and a gift for timelines
and sub-plots and I am eternally grateful for her vigilance.
Malissa, as always, lives up to her reputation as a living
cliché radar and never fails to point out the weak
scenes in my stories with judicious use of the words; pathetic,
wimpy, icky, girly….. gotta love that! Finally, Fern.
Brilliant, incisive beta reader who covers everything from the
numerous spelling and grammatical errors to holes in the plot
that I thought no-one would notice. And she uses phrases like
'omniscent narrator'. I am truly blessed. One more - Laura, you
gave me one of the plot ideas, so I hope you don't mind my
'inside joke' when you read it.
WARNINGS: Read the very bottom of this post if you are the type
who likes warnings.
The story so far…..
In 'The Lie' a seventeen year old Padawan named Obi-Wan gives
his friends the impression he and his Master are lovers, and
nearly loses said Master over his lie. He befriends an old
lover of Qui-Gon's - one Daen Koran, Jedi Master.
In "Daen", a nineteen year old Obi-Wan asks an old friend to be
his first lover. Qui-Gon Jinn handles jealousy quite badly, but
when the truth becomes known, the Jedi Master's innate sense of
honour rises to the fore.
In "Bear the Consequences" Obi-Wan and his friend Valerin get
into trouble and Obi-Wan and his Master must both bear the
punishment. Valerin is expelled from the Temple and sent to the
AirCorps, and Qui-Gon Jinn makes love to Obi-Wan Kenobi for the
first time. The morning after, Obi-Wan misinterprets a
conversation he overhears and assumes the worst.
In "Aftermath" Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan have been sent to Dantooine
on a mission, but are barely speaking to each other. Obi-Wan
has a little too much to drink after a night out dancing with
friends, and as he attempts (quite successfully) to seduce his
Master, he lets slip the awful truth - that he thought Qui-Gon
Jinn was still in a relationship with Mace Windu when Obi-Wan
and Qui-Gon made love. Qui-Gon demonstrates the difference
between making love and fucking, but when his anger quits him
he leaves in despair. While driving around the unfamiliar
planet, he is involved in an accident and is in a coma for
three days.
In "Misdirection" Qui-Gon struggles with memory loss and a
strong suspicion that Obi-Wan is hiding the truth from him
regarding the events on Dantooine. After the truth comes out,
Mace (on behalf of the Council) decides that Obi-Wan and
Qui-Gon must be separated permanently. Qui-Gon realises that to
disobey the order would cost Obi-Wan his future in the Jedi.
Obi-Wan has been ordered on a mission with Daen, and Qui-Gon
makes the hardest decision he has ever made - to force Obi-Wan
to leave him forever.
Excerpt from "Misdirection" follows:
"Where are my things?" Obi-Wan asked dully.
Qui-Gon would not meet his eyes.
"I had them packed for you. The Council were impressed with the
way you and Daen dealt with the Naboo rebuilding program. They
want to send you on a few more missions together, to ready you
for your trials. Mace will oversee the rest of your training
but it's a formality only. I know you'll do well, Obi-Wan."
The words were like shards of glass. It was a familiar tone,
and he'd heard the words before but now they were killing him
slowly. He had been replaced.
"You'll be taking Anakin as your Padawan, then?" Please say no.
Say it was a mistake, say you forgive me. Don't send me away.
"Yes."
Obi-Wan could only stare helplessly, his chest aching as he
fought to control his pain. It had come full circle - once
again, Qui-Gon was rejecting him. In that instant he knew that
if he walked out of this room now he would never seen Qui-Gon
Jinn again. He stepped forward and knelt beside the couch, his
head bowed.
"Please, Master. Please don't give me up." The words ended in a
sob and he was crying now, silently, the tears running down his
face, his shoulders hunched and heaving.
Qui-Gon closed his eyes for a brief second before marshaling
every resource he'd ever had to pull enough strength together
to do this. Oh, Obi-Wan, I'm so sorry. Forgive me, my beloved
Padawan.
Nothing had ever hurt this much.
"You'll be fine, Obi-Wan." He risked the briefest touch on
Obi-Wan's bowed head as he rose from the couch. The last time
he would ever touch Obi-Wan again.
Qui-Gon Jinn left the room. The sound of Obi-Wan sobbing would
stay with him for a very long time.
And now… on to "All I Wanted To Say".
W
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Happy ending alert. I don't do death stories. ;-)
"No, Mace." Qui-Gon spoke matter-of-factly, almost
indifferently, but Mace Windu knew an absolute refusal when he
heard one. He tried anyway.
"The boy needs a Master, Qui-Gon."
Qui-Gon met his old friend's gaze squarely, his eyes hard.
"And I already have a Padawan. Even if it weren't against the
Code, I wouldn't take on another one."
"Against the Code?" Mace shook his head in frustration. "You're
actually going to quote the Code to *me*? Obi-Wan will be a
Knight any time now - all he has to do is take his trials."
"But he hasn't taken them yet, has he? And until he does,
Obi-Wan is still my Padawan. I've already let you separate us.
I've let you send Obi-Wan as far away from me as you could get
him, and with *Daen* no less, but I will not take another
Padawan and that's final."
Mace sighed, his anger at Qui-Gon's stubbornness slowly being
replaced by concern.
"You mean you won't take another Padawan until after Obi-Wan is
Knighted?" He asked carefully, knowing what the answer would be
but hoping he was mistaken.
Qui-Gon raised an eyebrow sardonically.
"No, Mace. I mean I don't wish to take another Padawan at all.
I've had three, I've done my best for the future of the Jedi.
I'll go wherever the Council sends me, but I won't take another
Padawan. Not now and not ever again."
The trip from Naboo to Coruscant had only taken a day. Qui-Gon
had boarded the transport well before they were due to depart,
thus avoiding any tearful farewells when Mace bought Anakin
onboard. Whether there had been a scene or not, he had no idea.
Mace had tended to Anakin throughout the journey, and Qui-Gon
Jinn had meditated.
Obi-Wan was gone. His current mission with Daen would end, and
sometime in the next few months, the Council would reward
Obi-Wan Kenobi with a Knighthood in the Jedi Order. And Qui-Gon
wouldn't be there to see it. Mace had made it clear that the
Council would not allow Qui-Gon to see Obi-Wan at all.
Qui-Gon knew that Obi-Wan would never bring a formal complaint
against him for what he had done on Dantooine. The knowledge
made his self-disgust even deeper. He had failed Obi-Wan so
completely, so thoroughly, that the fact that he was still in
the Jedi Order was farcical.
As the tiny transport sped towards Coruscant, Qui-Gon had
considered his future. He had been a fool to even consider
training Anakin. An image that remained burned into his brain
had shown him how dangerous that idea was. The image was of
Obi-Wan, kneeling before him, sobbing, pleading with him. It
haunted Qui-Gon's dreams, made his days sheer, living torture.
He wasn't fit to take another Padawan.
Yoda did not appear surprised when Qui-Gon turned up at his
quarters very late on his first night back on Coruscant. For a
short time Qui-Gon allowed his former Master to fuss over him.
He was seated on the low cushions in the main room, a cup of
steaming tea in hand before Yoda took his own seat opposite and
motioned him to speak.
Qui-Gon left none of the story out. His feelings on seeing
Obi-Wan kissed for the first time, the events on Minoro, the
months of sheer, hard slog that had followed. Valerin, Daen.
Too long fighting his own feelings, denying the love he felt
for Obi-Wan. The guilt, the jealousy, the despair. There was a
light in Qui-Gon's eyes as he spoke of the night he had first
made love to Obi-Wan. That disappeared as he confessed the sin
he had committed on Dantooine and everything that had happened
since.
"Help me, Master. Please." There were tears in Qui-Gon's eyes
and his voice spoke volumes of the desperation he was feeling.
Yoda said nothing at all, simply listening to Qui-Gon's
request. When Qui-Gon finished speaking Yoda raised one small
hand.
"Sleep, you will."
Qui-Gon slept on the cushions in Yoda's quarters for the rest
of the evening and night, waking early the next morning. It was
the first decent rest he'd had in what seemed to be forever,
and he felt refreshed for it. His determination had not
wavered, though. He breakfasted with Yoda, and after clearing
up the dishes, he asked one final question before leaving.
"You'll arrange it, then?"
Yoda nodded sadly.
"Arrange it, I will."
Qui-Gon paused in the doorway. In his eyes there was both
sorrow and apology. He turned and left.
Obi-Wan pored over mission reports, economic forecasts and news
broadcasts, looking for some clues as to where a shipment of
stolen Kastrellian ore had ended up. Daen was talking to the
Captain of the transport they were on and Obi-Wan was alone in
their quarters.
There was a cold emptiness inside Obi-Wan that he was still
trying to come to terms with. Qui-Gon didn't want him. Every
day since Qui-Gon had first rejected him more than seven years
ago Obi-Wan had waited for that moment. He had always known it
would come eventually. Curiously, all the years of preparation
hadn't helped one iota when the moment had finally come.
Over the years, particularly during his mid-teens, Obi-Wan had
fantasised many times about how it would finally eventuate. He
would fail an important exam, or insult a dignitary on a
mission, perhaps. How it happened was unimportant. The point
was that it would happen. There was so much to know, so much to
learn. And if he hadn't been good enough to be chosen before
he'd left for the AgriCorps, what chance did he have to live up
to the lofty standards of one of the greatest Jedi Masters of
all time?
There had always been a curious comfort in the horrifying
fantasies. What was important was that he maintained his
dignity. Obi-Wan had imagined a hundred times handing his
lightsaber over to Qui-Gon, perhaps kneeling as he made a
brief, but dignified apology for letting his Master down. He
would then turn around and walk away, never to look back. There
was more than a streak of enjoyment in the composition of his
farewell speech. Qui-Gon would feel guilty for elevating his
hopes, but would be pleased that Obi-Wan handled the failure so
well.
A favourite of Obi-Wan's was the 'turning to the Dark Side'
fantasy. A Sith Lord (and Obi-Wan had never seen one so he gave
his imagination full rein in creating this horned demon with an
evil grin) would, for some inexplicable reason, attempt to turn
Obi-Wan to the Dark Side. But Obi-Wan would resist temptation,
blackmail and bribery, and would remain true to the Light. Even
though he would ultimately lose his place in the Jedi Order,
Qui-Gon would be proud of him for succeeding where Xanatos had
failed.
In nearly all of his fantasies, he and Qui-Gon had met up
somewhere in the future. Obi-Wan was incredibly successful, of
course, helping people or saving planets or whatever; and
Qui-Gon was always suitably awed. Many times his fantasies had
him rescuing Qui-Gon from some life-threatening situation. It
was only when the hormonally-induced teenage depression hit him
that Obi-Wan's fantasies turned darker. Qui-Gon crying over his
lifeless body. Packed funerals where his devastated friends
talked about the self-less sacrifice of his life.
And rarely - very rarely - he would fantasise about being
Knighted. Qui-Gon cutting off his braid, asking if he could
keep it. Requesting a permanent partnership with Obi-Wan. A
soul-bond, even.
Obi-Wan shook his head as his thoughts wandered yet again.
Impatient with himself, he turned back to the mission reports
and continued to read. There was so much to do. He didn't have
time to think about the fact that while his worst nightmare had
come true, he hadn't even had the luxury of a dignified exit.
The shame he felt every time he thought of himself on his
knees, begging Qui-Gon not to give him up, was crippling.
Qui-Gon Jinn had ultimately done him a favour, though. Obi-Wan
Kenobi knew, without doubt, that if he did not die on this
mission, he would become a Jedi Knight.
What should have concerned him was the fact that he had no
particular preference for one of those options over the other.
Mace Windu had not been called before the Council for a great
many years, and from his affronted expression, he had not
missed this particular privilege. The Council in this instance
consisted only of Yoda and Yarael Poof.
Mace stood before the two Jedi Masters. He neither knelt, nor
bowed his head, and he made no attempt at shielding his
irritation at the summons. He had already made a full report to
the Council. Certainly things had not gone well, but given the
circumstances that was to have been expected.
Yarael Poof spoke first.
"This vision you saw. Did you ask Obi-Wan what had happened?"
Mace heard the reproof in the question and became defensive.
"I did not, my Master. Obi-Wan has always been extremely close
to Qui-Gon, and would never have spoken against him. I did not
wish to put him in a position where he would either have to lie
to me, or betray his own Master."
"Discuss the vision with Qui-Gon, did you?" This came from
Yoda.
"No. When we retrieved his full memories of the evening I lived
the event with him. There was no need to subject him to further
inquisition. He was already shattered by the memory."
Silence for a moment.
"Separate them permanently, you did."
Mace hesitated before answering.
"I had to make a decision. It was clear that Obi-Wan was so
influenced by Qui-Gon he would never speak against him, and I
couldn't have them remain together after what had happened.
Without a Council edict there was always the chance that one or
both of them would seek the other out."
Yoda sighed. Mace could feel that he had erred, but was unsure
what it was he was supposed to have done. The two Council
members communicated mentally for a time while Mace waited
patiently. Finally Yoda spoke again.
"Too hasty, your actions were."
Mace had no answer for the accusation, but he could not help
but feel annoyed. He was a Council member - in a position to
make decisions that would affect the lives of the Jedi under
his control. Could anyone else on the Council truly have
handled the situation better?
"Know, do you, what mission Qui-Gon has requested?" Yoda asked
softly, and Mace met his gaze in confusion. Qui-Gon had
requested a mission?
"No, my Master."
"Dittrich's decision, he has made."
Mace went cold inside. He struggled to contain the sheer horror
he felt at Yoda's calm pronouncement.
Qui-Gon Jinn had asked for a suicide mission.
Mace Windu had been wrong. He had acted incorrectly, with the
arrogance of the youngest Jedi ever to sit on the Jedi Council.
His conceit had brought Qui-Gon to this. Mace fought to steady
himself, and he was only partially successful. His voice
trembled.
"I will resign from the Council, Master. I have failed Qui-Gon
and Obi-Wan. I will tell them my decisions did not have the
approval of the Council - perhaps another Council member could
assist them …"
Yarael was shaking his head.
"Your resignation would not help matters. The Jedi who follow
the Code would begin to doubt the Council's wisdom if we were
to reverse our decisions. No - another solution to the problem
of Qui-Gon and his Padawan will be found. You have other
matters to attend to."
Mace Windu took a long, deep breath. Veteran of more missions
than he could remember, he had seen and heard horrors
imaginable, and had met each one of them with the calm dignity
expected of a Jedi. But here in the Council chamber was the
last place he would have expected to have the ground completely
cut away from him like this and he was unprepared. Jedi
training took over then, and Mace spent several long minutes
calming his mind and body. Yoda and Yarael both waited
patiently until Mace was calm enough to view the situation
rationally.
Mace Windu trusted the two Jedi before him implicitly, and if
they said they could find a solution to the problem of Obi-Wan
and Qui-Gon, then he had absolute faith in them. Yoda would do
everything in his power to save Qui-Gon from suicide, and while
Obi-Wan lived, there was always hope. With a conscious
decision, Mace drew up the remnants of emotion that surrounded
the problem of Qui-Gon Jinn and Obi-Wan Kenobi, and released
them to the Force. He had failed in his task and the
responsibility would now be taken from him.
Mace's brain was finally able to fully process the comment
Yarael had made.
"Other matters, my Master?"
Yoda explained. "A Padawan you now have. Time to sit on the
Council you have not. Much work there is in training a
Padawan."
Mace closed his eyes with a grimace. He dreaded the answer, but
the question had to be asked.
"A Padawan?"
"You brought Anakin Skywalker to the Temple, Master Windu. You
promised him he would be trained as a Jedi Knight. With Qui-Gon
Jinn unavailable, you are the logical choice to take over this
duty." Yarael was quite firm on this point.
Mace Windu was not one to plead - at least, not unless there
was no other option available.
"But, Masters - surely another Jedi would be more suited? It's
been years since I had a Padawan."
He couldn't be sure but it almost looked as though there was a
gleam of humour in Yoda's expression.
"Bear the consequences of your actions, you must."
It was only through sheer willpower that Mace Windu avoided
rolling his eyes at the Jedi Master. Who knew that old chestnut
would one day be leveled at *him*?
"Yes Master."
He bowed and left the room. The two Council members had no
trouble discerning his mental snort of disgust. A *Padawan*.
Master Yoda, head of the Jedi Council and a Jedi Master himself
with more than 900 years experience, stretched with surprising
agility after his meditation.
Fault where it was due. Qui-Gon Jinn had been *his* Padawan,
and he had known of Qui-Gon's relationship with Mace Windu. The
excuse that his attention had been elsewhere was nothing but
that; an excuse. This would provide an excellent training tool
for future Council members, after he had removed the names of
those involved, of course. Even those with centuries of
experience made mistakes.
A comm to the Temple archivist, and the clip he required was
delivered minutes later. Yoda put the disk aside and
concentrated on finding a suitable mission for Qui-Gon. To
anyone watching, it would appear that Yoda was dozing off. In
fact, the revered Jedi Master was allowing the Force to guide
him as he did a mental inventory that would be quite impossible
for the majority of creatures in the Jedi Temple. Few had the
sheer mental capacity that Yoda did.
After a time the Jedi Master smiled and nodded to himself. The
perfect mission would be relatively simple to arrange - now all
he needed was a suitable trainee to send on the mission. Again
the memory banks rifled through years of data, fact and rumour,
and it was only moments before the perfect candidate came to
mind.
Yes, Padawan G'effen's presence on this mission should prove
most interesting.
Less than a week into his first formal mission, and Obi-Wan was
quite sure it would be his last. He and Daen had split up two
days ago. Their mission was to locate and retrieve several
missing shipments of Kastrellian ore, stolen by pirates.
Daen had decided it would be quicker to split up and spend a
few days seeking out information amongst the traders, dealers,
thieves and pilots who drank in the dingy cantinas that dotted
the planets along this system. Obi-Wan had been in and out of
several dozen such cantinas, and had a number of leads to track
down. It was when he decided to start looking around for a
place to stay the night that Obi-Wan ran into trouble.
He had been trying to avoid getting knocked down by a dozen
speeders that had appeared almost out of nowhere on the busy
city street. Unfortunately, a Gmorhean guard had chosen just
that moment to change his own direction and Obi-Wan had trodden
quite heavily on his foot.
Immediately the guard had drawn his blaster and had aimed it at
Obi-Wan. The Jedi Padawan was suddenly the centre of attention
as several of the guard's friends came to assist the squealing
Gmorhean. Obi-Wan backed away slowly, not wanting to draw his
lightsaber but wondering if he would have much of a chance with
it anyway. The guards all had their blasters drawn and he was
surrounded on all sides by a hostile crowd. Apologising was
pointless, but he gave it a shot anyway.
"I'm sorry, I didn't see you there."
The polite apology was met with squeals of indignation and
Obi-Wan realised that by suggesting the Gmorhean was too short
to notice, he had made a bad situation worse. The pig-like
guards all understood Basic but were intent on revenging the
imagined insult. As Obi-Wan attempted to remove himself
gracefully, palms spread in a universal gesture of peace, he
realised things were going to get violent any second. Across
the din of the crowd that surrounded him, though, came an
amused voice.
"Let him go, Orrnok. He's my passage back to Charmont and if I
don't take him, I won't be able to refuel which means no return
passage for you and your friends."
Obi-Wan froze for a second at the sound of a very familiar
voice and a grin stole across his features as he turned calmly
to face the speaker.
"Valerin! I thought you'd never get here."
Valerin quirked an eyebrow at Obi-Wan's cool dissembling.
"Who else, Obi-Wan? Protecting you from the bullies is my job,
after all." Valerin took Obi-Wan's arm in a firm grasp and led
him away from the crowd.
"I'll see you in a week, Orrnok!"
The Gmorhean and his friends just grunted and melted away into
the streets, leaving Obi-Wan and Valerin quite alone. A crowded
street was hardly the place for a reunion and Obi-Wan was
brimming with questions for his friend. He stayed silent,
though, as Valerin steered him through the backstreets to the
docking area, and then on to a small, neat ship.
Once inside, Valerin keyed in the alarm code and raised the
lights. Obi-Wan looked around him. The transport ship was small
but recently built and looked quite comfortable. What it was
not, was Jedi issue. Obi-Wan took a long look around, then
turned to face Valerin.
It had been less than two months since he had seen his friend
but Val looked all the better. Whilst a Padawan, Valerin had
often decried the staid nature of their uniforms, but it seemed
his current position was a better match for his striking
appearance. The black pants and shirt suited him admirably. The
once Padawan-short hair had grown quite long in the short time,
the silky black locks tied back with a ribbon. Valerin was at
once dashing and sophisticated, and Obi-Wan suddenly wondered
how much more had changed. But then the familiar cheeky grin
and the gleam in the blue eyes appeared and Obi-Wan found
himself crossing the floor to hug Valerin hard.
"Val - I missed you! What have you been up to? Whose ship is
this? And how do you know those Gmorheans…"
Valerin held one hand up mock-protestingly at Obi-Wan's stream
of questions. "Sit down and I'll tell you all about it."
They sat at two comfortable chairs and there was silence for a
long moment as Valerin took a long look at Obi-Wan. Obi-Wan had
changed, that much was abundantly clear. He looked …
empty. As though he was just going through the motions. Valerin
mentally shrugged off the odd notion. No doubt he was imagining
things.
"It was my second flight with the AirCorps. I was transporting
a Senator from Corellia to some negotiations and we ran into
trouble. A bunch of pirates wanting to kidnap the Senator very
nearly killed us all, but I managed to get us out of trouble.
The Senator offered me a job as his permanent pilot so I took
it. I contacted you, but Xera told me you and Qui-Gon had just
left for Dantooine."
Obi-Wan mentally winced at the memory of that journey. He
nodded to Valerin to continue.
"The Senator was an okay guy, but I wanted my own ship.
Corellia was just the place to win it, too. I won this ship in
a game of Sabaac, and I've been free-lancing ever since. With
my contacts on Corellia I get a lot of regular work there,
transporting guards to and from the colonies all along the
inner basin. And the Council were pretty good about it. They
hired me to do a job for them last month when one of their own
pilots wasn't available. It's a good living."
Obi-Wan looked around the neat little ship and nodded
thoughtfully.
"A game of Sabaac, huh? Tell me, Val, did you happen to mention
you were an ex-Jedi when you joined the game?"
Valerin grinned and didn't answer.
Obi-Wan rolled his eyes. He glanced around him at the trim
ship.
"So tell me, does she have a name?"
There was the briefest glimmer of pain that flashed so quickly
over Valerin's eyes Obi-Wan could almost have thought he'd
imagined it.
"Yeah. 'Consequences'."
The terse word told its own story. Master Toruk had never been
the most emotional of Jedi Masters, but when Valerin had been
expelled from the Jedi Temple, his Master hadn't even argued
with the Council. His goodbye present had been a short, telling
lecture on the consequences of breaking the rules, after which
he had simply turned and walked away, leaving his ex-Padawan to
face his future in the AirCorps alone. Obi-Wan swallowed as a
stray thought entered his head. Qui-Gon would never have done
that. Qui-Gon would have fought with the Council, made them see
he deserved a second chance. And if Obi-Wan had still been
expelled Qui-Gon would have gone with him and seen that he
settled in to the AirCorps.
The two friends sat in silence for a moment before Valerin
smiled at his friend.
"You always did have a soft heart, Obi-Wan. Don't worry too
much - I'm very content with my life. Looking back I'm not sure
I would ever have become a Jedi Knight. Now I have my own ship
and I'm free to do whatever I like. It's a little lonely
sometimes, but apart from that I'm perfectly happy."
Obi-Wan glanced down at the table.
"I still missed you."
Valerin gave a soft laugh.
"You've changed, Obi-Wan. It hasn't been that long since I
left. What the hell has happened to you?"
Obi-Wan gave a brief summary of the mission on Dantooine and
their time on Naboo. He left out his relationship with Qui-Gon,
but gave a brief rundown of his current mission. Valerin was
suitably impressed when Obi-Wan told him who he was partnered
with.
"Daen? As in Master Daen Koran who kissed you that time in the
dining hall? As in Daen Koran, your first lover?"
Obi-Wan rolled his eyes at Valerin's cheeky comments.
"No, Val - the other Daen Koran. Of *course* it's the same one.
We're just good friends now."
Valerin's eyes narrowed in thought.
"Well, I'd hardly expect anything else from you, Obi-Wan. After
all, I thought you were madly in love with Master Jinn." The
light comment drew quite a remarkable reaction from Obi-Wan. He
paled, then flushed, and a look of sheer misery chased by anger
swept across his expressive features. Valerin was both
intrigued and concerned.
"Do you want to talk about it?" The question was gently asked.
Obi-Wan stood, and held out his hand.
"In the morning, maybe."
There was no mistaking the invitation, so Valerin rose from his
own seat and took the proffered hand. It was Valerin who led
them both to his sleeping quarters, but there was no doubting
this was Obi-Wan's show. Thoughts of past regrets were swept
away during that long evening, as Obi-Wan demonstrated very
ably just how much he had changed from the boy Valerin had
known.
Qui-Gon Jinn read the mission briefing calmly in the privacy of
his own quarters. Yoda had given him exactly what he had asked
for.
Qui-Gon's mission was to locate and retrieve several missing
shipments of Kastrellian ore. The Jedi Order owned a number of
mining colonies where the valuable mineral was mined by droids
and sold for profit. Although unable to accept payment for
services rendered, the Jedi Order owned substantial resources
that were used to fund their activities. Pirates had stolen the
ore and two civilians who worked for the Jedi had been killed.
Of the systems along the inner basin, there were hundreds of
planets who used Kastrellian ore. The amounts stolen were in
such huge quantity that they would make a marked difference to
any planet's economy once absorbed into the market. Qui-Gon
would be busy doing the physical work of the investigation, and
Master Yoda had temporarily assigned him a Padawan to work with
him on this mission. The Padawan would be research assistant,
in charge of information gathering. Reports would be needed on
the economic situations of several hundred planets, recent
changes and the likely impact on neighbouring systems if one of
them suddenly became rich in the sought-after mineral.
Yoda had assigned him a Padawan whose Master sat on the
Council. Qui-Gon frowned when he read the name of the Padawan
he'd been assigned, but then dismissed it from his mind. It
hardly mattered, after all.
Once Qui-Gon discovered the identity of the hijackers, he would
drop the Padawan off on the nearest hospitable planet and would
continue the assignment alone. One Jedi heading into the very
heart of a cut-throat industry. Pirates, thieves, hijackers,
villains, scum. The likelihood of his surviving this mission
was negligible. It suited his needs admirably.
Daen found the ship 'Consequences' with little difficulty. The
unusual name wasn't the only incongruous thing about the ship.
The neat little transport stood out amongst the heaps in the
docking bay and Daen still had no idea how or why Obi-Wan had
decided to make this particular ship his base. His message just
gave his location, and Daen had had things to do before he
could meet up with Obi-Wan. There was no way of contacting the
ship, so he'd simply decided to turn up unannounced.
As he approached the transport the docking ramp lowered and a
very beautiful young man began walking down the ramp. There was
something familiar about him but Daen couldn't quite put his
finger on it. The young man was a stunner, that much was
certain. Long, jet black hair pulled back and tied with a
ribbon, aquiline features and a pair of piercing blue eyes went
a long way to making him a very pleasant package to look at.
The vision approached him and Daen remained where he was,
enjoying the view.
"Master Koran?"
The voice was familiar, too. A second of thought and Daen had
it.
"Valerin, isn't it? Obi-Wan's friend from the Temple."
Valerin raised an eyebrow at the description and shrugged. He
shouldered Daen's bag and led the way back up the ramp, talking
over his shoulder as Daen followed.
"Yes. Ex-Jedi Padawan, now free-lance pilot. This is my ship."
The defensive tone explained much, and now Daen had a better
understanding of the ship's unusual name. So this was the
Padawan who had been expelled from the Temple? The Jedi Master
gave no indication of knowing about Valerin's past, simply
walking into the main room of the ship while Valerin closed the
ramp and tended to security.
"Where is Obi-Wan?"
"Asleep."
The short reply was accompanied by a challenging glance. Ah. So
the would-be lover of a year ago got his wish? Daen had a
sudden mental image of the two of them together, the striking
colouring and lithe form of this "ex-Jedi Padawan" wrapped
around Obi-Wan's golden skin and leanly muscled body…
Daen took a seat in one of the chairs at the table.
"Well, don't wake him on my account."
A tempting smell wafted through to the main room and Daen
sniffed appreciatively.
"Something smells good." His hopeful gleam wasn't lost on
Valerin.
"I only take *paying* passengers."
His tone was hard and Daen wondered why. He raised an eyebrow
and looked Valerin up and down with a calculating look that was
guaranteed to be as offensive as possible. Valerin stiffened in
anger.
"And Obi-Wan is paying in trade, is he?" The question was mild
but it elicited a flash of pure fury from Valerin's eyes.
Before he could speak, though, he was interrupted.
"Don't be an asshole, Daen. Val saved my life yesterday."
Obi-Wan took a seat at the table between where Daen was sitting
and Valerin still standing. Valerin looked no less furious, but
he said nothing. Daen attempted an apologetic look.
"Sorry."
It was less than convincing and Obi-Wan could see the warning
signs in Valerin's expression. He put a hand out to his friend
and the plea in his eyes stopped whatever comments Valerin was
on the verge of making.
"Val, I'm starving and I need to talk to Daen. You promised to
feed me, remember?" Valerin's mouth twisted at the obvious
ploy, but he refrained from speaking. As he left the room,
though, he gave Daen a glance that would have felled a mere
mortal.
Obi-Wan turned to Daen after Valerin had left the room.
"I haven't told Val much about our mission but he could really
help us, Daen. It would take us forever to find anything this
way. The transport that dropped us here isn't even due back for
another week. What happens if we find someone we need to
follow? Val's ship is small and fast and he not only knows all
the routes, he also knows most of the pirate ships by sight."
Daen shook his head.
"Obi-Wan, we can't rope a civilian into helping us. The Council
would never approve."
Obi-Wan raised an eyebrow.
"Since when have you cared what the Council thought? Besides,
the Council have hired Valerin themselves since he left the
AirCorps, so I doubt they would have any objections. We'd end
up paying more to hire a private ship, not to mention meals and
accommodations on the planet. It'll be more economical."
Daen held his hands up in mock surrender.
"All right, you've convinced me. I have to call the Council to
check in anyway so I'll ask them. *If* we get approval we'll
use him."
Valerin re-entered the room at that moment bearing two plates
heaped high with a steaming stew and fresh bread. He placed one
in front of Obi-Wan and slammed the other down in front of
Daen.
"You'll use me? I work for me, Jedi. You want to hire my
services, you can *ask*." His tone was acidic and even Obi-Wan
was surprised at his ire. Daen took it in stride.
"Excuse me, 'ex-Jedi Padawan now free-lance pilot'. I had no
idea the call for your services was so high." Daen's sarcastic
comments had an instant effect as Valerin visibly paled with
fury. "All we want is a ship and someone to fly it. You *can*
manage that, can't you?"
"Daen!" Obi-Wan was irate. What the hell was the matter with
Daen? It wasn't like him to … his thought was cut off
abruptly as Valerin reached over and up-ended the hot plate of
food onto Daen's lap.
"Fly *that*, asshole. Now get off my ship."
Qui-Gon Jinn was tired. The maker only knew how this particular
Padawan had ever come as far as this in the Jedi Order, but
only two days of her company and Qui-Gon was sorely tempted to
'accidentally' forget her on one of the planets they visited.
It was very late in the night cycle and Qui-Gon was reading
mission reports, economic statements, news readouts and a
plethora of information from other sources. In essence, the
very things his temporary Padawan should have read before
compiling the first of her reports. Her job on this mission,
after all, was to act as Qui-Gon Jinn's research assistant.
It wasn't that Padawan G'effen was unintelligent or even lazy.
She was just … annoying. And insufferably conceited.
Qui-Gon sighed as he scrolled through another long report, his
Jedi-trained mind automatically discarding what he didn't need
and making a mental note of the rest. He had strictly forbidden
his research assistant to move from her quarters during the
third time shift, and these had become the only hours of peace
Qui-Gon had all day.
It seemed hard to believe that someone who had trained for
close to seven years as a Jedi Padawan could behave in such a
fashion, but it was true. Since he had bought her onboard, she
had flirted, primped, preened, giggled and generally made
herself as obnoxious as possible, touching him at every
opportunity. It was as though someone had told her that her
future life partner would be boarding the ship with her and she
had a limited amount of time to convince him to bond with her.
Her reports were barely adequate and Qui-Gon was beginning to
suspect that her omissions were deliberate. At first he had sat
her down and patiently explained how to write a report of this
nature correctly. Which information was important and which was
not. It soon became clear to him, though, that Arista G'effen
was more interested in having his undivided attention on her
than she was in improving her work.
Qui-Gon straightened in his chair after several hours of solid
research. He had enough information now to help him greatly at
his next planet where, thankfully, he could swap Arista's
cloying attentions for the more preferable company of the Hutts
and the sycophantic scum that lied, stole and cheated for them.
Daen would have found the situation amusing. No. Best not to
even think about Daen, because thinking about Daen would lead
to thinking about Obi-Wan and that wasn't going to do him the
slightest bit of good.
When he'd come onboard, Arista had been draped gracefully over
the pilot's chair, apparently reading a data pad. It was a
provocative pose that had no doubt taken quite some time to
achieve, but Qui-Gon wasn't in the mood to humour the girl.
"Padawan G'effen."
Arista had looked up at him, apparently surprised to see him.
"Master Jinn! I didn't think you would be boarding so early."
"You're in the pilot's chair, Padawan G'effen. Unless you're
qualified to fly this ship, I suggest you move." He'd tried not
to sound brusque, but it was hard. A year ago he would have
been more tolerant but Sith!, he wasn't in the mood for this.
Arista had moved out of the chair, somehow managing to brush
her entire body up against his and make it look as though the
cramped space in the cockpit was to blame. It was quite a feat,
given that he had been standing more than two feet away from
her. He had taken the pilot's chair and set the course for the
planet Ogitrev without further comment.
After a day of sly innuendo, giggling and yet more 'casual'
physical contact he was ready to dump her out of the nearest
airlock. At the end of the day when Qui-Gon had entered the
small room designated for meals he had been possessed of a
cowardly impulse to simply turn around and return to his own
quarters.
Arista had done her best to set the scene for romance. There
were candles on the table, the lights were dimmed and soft
music played in the background. The average Padawan would
hardly carry such things as standard gear, so Qui-Gon surmised
that Arista had packed a few extras when she had heard who she
would be traveling with. He had heard her call out from the
small kitchenette inviting him to sit, as though they were on a
date.
Gritting his teeth, Qui-Gon had gone to the light switch and
turned it back up to maximum. The music was switched off then,
and he was in the process of blowing out the candles that
scattered the room when she entered with a pot of something
that was undoubtedly dinner. Qui-Gon did not pause for a
second, simply continuing around the room to extinguish the
candles without comment.
Clearly Arista had some basic intelligence, because aside from
a pained glance, she refrained from complaining. During the
meal Qui-Gon was uncommunicative, the few responses he made
terse to the point of rudeness. Arista managed to carry on the
conversation by herself and after only a short time Qui-Gon
conceded that her own conceit was such that she was probably
used to talking about herself to the point of nausea.
Qui-Gon remembered Arista quite well from the Temple. Obi-Wan
had experienced a crush on her when he was fifteen and she had
delighted in publicly humiliating him then. Two years later
Obi-Wan had suffered the usual Padawan's crush on his Master,
and there had been some difficulties between them. Qui-Gon
remembered Arista's constant put-downs, the endless stream of
nasty comments she aimed at his vulnerable Padawan. He hadn't
stepped in then, knowing that Obi-Wan would have to cope with
far worse when he became a Jedi Knight. Daen had, though.
Qui-Gon's jaw hardened then as he made a conscious effort not
to think about Obi-Wan and Daen. As though he wasn't missing
Obi-Wan enough, the Force had sent him this further torture to
remind him of how much he depended on having Obi-Wan at his
side.
As Arista's prattle continued, seemingly without end, Qui-Gon
found his attention wandering. It was very hard not to think of
Obi-Wan. His Padawan would have found the situation exceedingly
funny and Qui-Gon ached with sadness at the thought that
Obi-Wan would never hear about it.
With that thought came a curious sympathy for Arista. She was
vain and empty-headed but that was no excuse for him to be so
brutal. This would be his last mission, after all. He had
caused his own Master a great deal of pain by asking him to do
this. The least he could do would be to perform his final
mission with the dignity and patience Yoda had spent so long
teaching him.
After that first night, Qui-Gon Jinn made a conscious effort to
be nicer to Arista. He gave her flirting absolutely no
encouragement whatsoever, and he was stood firm in his order
that she remain in her quarters during the night cycle, but at
all other times he was courteous and unfailingly polite.
Yoda would have been proud.
It felt like forever before Obi-Wan managed to placate both
Valerin and Daen, and for a time he had thought the task beyond
his abilities. Daen had been furious at the lapful of hot food
he'd received and it was only after he'd showered and laundered
his clothes that he had calmed down.
Valerin had been another matter. Obviously he felt a great deal
resentment towards the Jedi for his dismissal from the order,
and for some reason Daen seemed to bring all of Valerin's
unresolved anger to the surface.
One would have to be blind to miss the sexual tension between
the two of them, and that was something that Obi-Wan would have
to spend some time thinking about. But for the moment, he had
managed a truce between Daen and Valerin. Daen had contacted
the Council to make a request to use Valerin and his ship on
the mission, and he was currently awaiting the Council's
response up in the cockpit.
Obi-Wan had ended up cleaning up the mess from the earlier
confrontation, before eating his own cold dinner. He'd been too
hungry to care. Valerin had sat at the table with him after
he'd finished the meal.
"That was great, Val. Thanks."
Valerin nodded his head towards the cockpit where Daen was
communicating with the Council.
"Well if *he* wants to be fed he can get it himself."
Obi-Wan gave a small grin.
"I don't think he'd trust you to serve him again, Val."
There was an answering twinkle in Valerin's eyes as he fought
his own answering smile. Obi-Wan had no trouble deciphering
Valerin's too-nonchalant tone of voice.
"So. Is it serious between you two?"
There was really only one answer he could make. The one person
who could make him happy was lost to him forever, and Obi-Wan
had no intention of leading Daen on, particularly now.
"No."
Obi-Wan saw the look of frustration that skimmed Valerin's
features at the paucity of his response. Val wanted to ask,
badly, but didn't want to betray his interest. Taking pity on
his old friend, Obi-Wan opened up about Daen.
"He's never taken a Padawan - says he doesn't have the right
temperament. But he's a fantastic Jedi. A skilled fighter, a
natural diplomat. He gets all the tough missions; the ones on
the outer rim, the wars, assassinations, you know the type. He
loves what he does but I think he needs someone more permanent
in his life."
Val snorted.
"With that winning personality? Who would put up with him?"
Obi-Wan smothered a grin.
"Oh, I don't know. With his looks he gets plenty of offers but
it's hard to have a relationship outside of the Jedi Order. And
he doesn't exactly spend a lot of time with other Jedi, so it
makes things difficult."
Valerin frowned.
"So why are you here, with him? You promised to tell me what
was going on with you, Obi-Wan. Why aren't you with Master
Jinn?"
Obi-Wan sighed and glanced towards the cockpit. Daen wouldn't
be able to hear them at this distance, and he would probably be
several hours trying to contact the Council.
"It's kind of a long story, Val."
The two friends sat talking for a long time. Or rather, Obi-Wan
talked and Valerin listened. In all it was a fascinating story,
but Obi-Wan made it clear that he wasn't expecting a permanent
relationship with Daen. Valerin wondered how hard it would be
to get Qui-Gon here. Any fool could see they loved each other.
Obi-Wan's story didn't make sense in a lot of areas, and
Valerin knew enough of Qui-Gon Jinn to know that he cared very
deeply about Obi-Wan. It was something Obi-Wan had always had
somewhat of a blind spot about. For all Obi-Wan's intelligence,
he had always seemed completely oblivious to the fact that
Qui-Gon thought a great deal of him.
Daen entered the room and both men looked up at him
expectantly.
"The Council have granted permission for us to use
'Consequences' and her pilot. If that's all right with you,
Valerin?" Daen was politeness personified.
"If they're paying the usual rate then I suppose so. There are
two guest quarters onboard. I'll show you where to stow your
things." Valerin was equally courteous.
Obi-Wan had wondered how to avoid sleeping with Valerin *or*
Daen during the journey and he was greatly relieved to have
that problem taken from him by Val's assumption that the three
would each sleep in their own bed. The Jedi had a brief tour of
the ship before Valerin took the mission disk from Daen and
headed for the cockpit to get the ship on course. From the
information both Obi-Wan and Daen had picked up on planet, the
likely destination for the stolen ore seemed to be a planet not
far away, called Ogitrev.
When Valerin left to set course for Ogitrev, Daen handed a
second data clip to Obi-Wan with a curious look.
"There was an extra message - Eyes Only - for you. From Master
Yoda."
Obi-Wan took the proffered clip with a frown of puzzlement. Why
would the Jedi Master have sent him something he didn't want
Daen to see? With a shrug Obi-Wan pocketed the data clip and
headed for his own quarters.
Once inside the small room, Obi-Wan slipped the disk into the
viewscreen control panel. From the text that showed first, he
could see that this message - whatever it was - had been
recorded more than four years ago. More of the archival text
scrolled past him and suddenly Obi-Wan knew what this message
would be.
It was the practice of any Master to record a yearly message to
their Padawan in the event that they were killed before their
Padawan attained his or her Knighthood. Some Masters gave the
tapes to their Padawans on the day they were Knighted. Obi-Wan
had no way of knowing what, if anything, Qui-Gon had planned
for his own Knighting, and it seemed unlikely he ever would.
This tape had been sent to him by Yoda.
Obi-Wan scrolled through the rest of the archiving information
and then sat back in his chair as a holographic image of
Qui-Gon appeared before him. The image began to speak.
"Hello Padawan,"
"As I record this message you are sleeping in your quarters, no
doubt exhausted from today's activities. You turned seventeen
today, my Obi-Wan, and I can't help but wonder how much longer
I will have you in my life. Should I join with the Force before
you attain your Knighthood, Obi-Wan, there are some things I
want you to know."
Qui-Gon's holographic image looked so calm, so at peace. How
long since Obi-Wan had seen that look of serenity on Qui-Gon's
face? The image paused for a long moment, but Obi-Wan sat
transfixed. Nothing short of a physical attack could have moved
him from his seat at this moment. Qui-Gon's image sighed.
"After Xanatos I swore I would never take another Padawan. I
was determined never to play the fool again and I hurt you
badly, Obi-Wan. I hope I have the courage one day soon to
apologise to your face. I hope, too, that this will not be the
first time you hear me tell you how very proud I am of you."
"You won the saber competition today for the second year
running. But it isn't your skill with a lightsaber that has so
impressed me. It is your courage, Obi-Wan, your strength of
purpose, your determination. You have bought joy into my life,
pleasure that I thought I would never feel again."
Another pause as Qui-Gon rubbed the side of his face with his
thumb. The short beard hid a scar that went deep to the bone of
Qui-Gon's jaw. When he was tired, his jaw throbbed and Qui-Gon
would rub it unconsciously. Obi-Wan's heart ached at the sight
of a gesture he had seen perhaps a thousand times in his life.
"It is every Master's wish that his Padawan become a better
Jedi than he, and even now, I know that wish will come true for
me. You will be a great Knight, Obi-Wan. I have been honoured
and blessed with your presence in my life, and I can be honest
enough to admit that I do not want our time together to end."
"But you are growing up, and one day you will go your own way,
leaving your Master behind. I must do my best to see that you
spend time with other Knights and Masters so that you adapt
better when that time comes. An old friend of mine is coming to
visit. I suspect you'll like Daen, Obi-Wan - his sense of
humour frequently reminds me of yours."
The image of Qui-Gon smiled at him.
"If I am not present at your Knighting to tell you this in
person, Padawan, know that my absence would never be through
choice. If I am one with the Force then I will be watching over
you from another place, no doubt beaming with pride. You are
everything that is good in my life, Obi-Wan. Your achievements
to date are through your own impressive skills and dedication.
I am very proud of you, Obi-Wan."
The image faded out.
Obi-Wan's hand paused over the repeat button, wanting to hear
it again, wanting to see Qui-Gon again. But he hesitated. There
was so much to think about and he needed a clear mind to do so.
He rose from the chair, stripped down to under tunic and
leggings, and took his place in the centre of the room for some
deep meditation.
Some hours later Obi-Wan was more calm and centered than he
would have thought possible only a day ago. His mind was clear,
and he was ready to think about the tape he had just seen.
The most obvious question was why, of all the tapes Qui-Gon had
done, had Master Yoda sent this one? Obi-Wan knew the answer.
Yoda wanted Obi-Wan to see himself as Qui-Gon had seen him when
he had been just a Padawan and not a lover.
As Obi-Wan thought back over the years since Bandomeer, he
could see a pattern emerging. The victories in the 'saber
tournaments, the high marks, the praise from trainers and
tutors alike - these had all been shrugged off. Luck and poor
performance from his rivals were his favourite excuses. He had
never been good enough. Never been at the standard Xanatos had
achieved before turning. Had never been loved by his Master as
much as other Padawans were loved.
The truth, when it came, was so blinding in its simplicity that
Obi-Wan could only stare blankly at the wall in amazement. The
problem was *him*. He had always performed well in the physical
areas of training and he studied obsessively to avoid failing
any classes. The stark fact was, though, that he had never
failed a class. He was always in the top two percent, no matter
how many study sessions or tutorials he had missed. The shelf
in his room was full of trophies won in competitions of all
sorts and he had far outstripped anything Xanatos had ever
accomplished.
And Qui-Gon had been proud of him.
Obi-Wan had matured considerably since he was seventeen, and
had overcome the propensity for lying to himself. At his core
he was a truthful person and the truth was, Qui-Gon had always
shown him he was loved and wanted. Obi-Wan had brushed off the
congratulations, the warm compliments from Qui-Gon. Always he
had heard only the criticism, seen only the frowns of
disappointment. And when there were none of these, Obi-Wan's
active imagination had supplied plenty.
Qui-Gon had attended every tournament Obi-Wan had ever entered.
No matter how busy his workload, Qui-Gon had always been there
with a comforting hug, gentle advice and a proud smile. When
Obi-Wan had come fourth in his age-group at the saber
tournament at the age of 14, Qui-Gon had proudly displayed the
tiny trophy on his own desk for months afterwards. Obi-Wan
recalled taking it away and hiding it in his room, imagining
Qui-Gon kept it out of pity.
Hindsight stung with crystal clarity. Qui-Gon Jinn had given
Obi-Wan every reason to believe he was loved and wanted. Every
reason to think he was an exceptionally talented Padawan who
made his Master proud.
It is always difficult to face a personal truth that goes
against everything you have ever thought or believed, but
Obi-Wan Kenobi had never been an average person. More than
seventeen years of Jedi training went into his makeup, and with
brutal intensity Obi-Wan attacked every memory he had of his
time with Qui-Gon. He had been far from the perfect Padawan.
But he was capable. More than capable. Intelligent, talented,
highly gifted. Qui-Gon had been right - there was every chance
that one day he *would* make an exceptional Knight.
Obi-Wan forced himself to relive that horrendous scene on
Naboo, where Qui-Gon had told him he would be replaced by
Anakin. Looking back on it now, Obi-Wan couldn't believe he'd
been so blind. Qui-Gon Jinn was many things, but he was never
cruel. The brutal way he had dismissed Obi-Wan from his life
should have set alarms off, but Obi-Wan had been expecting the
rejection for most of his life, so he hadn't thought to look
beyond the obvious.
Even if Qui-Gon had chosen to take Anakin as his Padawan, he
would never have handled it that way. He would have seen
Obi-Wan all the way through his trials, supported him in
getting his Knighthood. There was only one reason Qui-Gon had
been so deliberately cruel the last time Obi-Wan had seen him,
and Obi-Wan realised, with a groan of self-disgust at his
blindness, what that reason was. The Jedi Council, or Mace
Windu, to be precise.
If Mace had found out what had happened on Dantooine he would
have ordered Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan to be separated. And Qui-Gon
would have gone along with it because he didn't want to risk
Obi-Wan's Knighthood.
Obi-Wan thought back to that first night of lovemaking. And it
*was* lovemaking. Qui-Gon Jinn loved him. Obi-Wan was flooded
with new determination. He would finish this mission and then
seek out Qui-Gon Jinn. It didn't matter if it cost him his
Knighthood - that was a small price to pay. On one point he had
no doubt - he could never be happy living without Qui-Gon Jinn.
More than twenty hours later Obi-Wan rose from the floor of his
quarters with a slight grimace at the stiffness of his limbs.
Daen had obviously checked on him, found him to be meditating
and had left him alone. Even now he could hear Valerin and Daen
moving about the ship. There was a great deal to do before they
arrived at their destination and Obi-Wan rose to go and help.
Obi-Wan was visibly distracted after his long meditation and
Daen had no trouble discerning the cause. Qui-Gon Jinn. Again.
They had run through the mission briefing and Daen had the
cockpit to himself to do some serious thinking. Obi-Wan was
reading mission briefs in the main room and Valerin was
sleeping, having been in the pilot's chair for most of the
night and morning.
There was one thing Daen was firmly convinced of. Obi-Wan and
Qui-Gon loved each other and belonged together. They could cope
with what had transpired between them, but they clearly
couldn't cope with being separated.
Obi-Wan gave an good impression of serenity, but too many times
Daen had caught a bleak look in his eyes. Qui-Gon's absence was
slowly destroying Obi-Wan and Daen wasn't prepared to allow
that.
It took Daen more than an hour to get through to the Council.
His request had not been judged urgent enough to interrupt the
meeting that was in progress, so he had waited impatiently
before finally getting the go-ahead to transmit.
Mace Windu's chair was empty. In his absence Adi Gallia spoke
for the Council after they had heard Daen's request.
"Given the circumstances that led to their being separated, the
Council does not see any reason to reverse its decision. For
what reason would we replace you on this mission with Qui-Gon
Jinn?"
Daen was prepared for the question.
"What happens between a bonded couple is none of the Council's
business, as you know, Master Gallia. It would be different if
Obi-Wan was a young Padawan, being taken advantage of. But the
Council seem convinced that Obi-Wan is only a short way off his
trials. You can't interfere in any problems between them, and
as I recall, it is the Council's policy not to separate couples
who share a soul-bond."
Adi Gallia schooled her expression with an effort, but Daen
could see the surprise in her eyes as she asked the obvious
question.
"Are you saying that Qui-Gon Jinn and Obi-Wan Kenobi have
formed such a bond?" The question was formally phrased, but for
something this serious, it was necessary.
"Yes. Obi-Wan and I have been intimate. There's no doubt of it.
He and Qui-Gon share a soul-bond."
Adi Gallia turned to Yoda for guidance. The head of the Jedi
Council looked into the viewscreen for a long moment, his
features inscrutable. Daen met the long look unflinchingly.
Eventually Yoda nodded his head.
"If soul-bond they have, interfere we cannot. Replace you on
the mission Qui-Gon Jinn will."
Daen let out a breath he hadn't realised he'd been holding and
bowed slightly to encompass the entire Jedi Council.
"Thank you, my Masters. I will prepare for the transfer
immediately."
The holographic image winked out of view then, and Daen missed
the murmur of conversation from the Council after his
transmission ended. He also missed the twinkle of humour in
Yoda's eyes as the Jedi Master met the gaze of Yarael Poof.
Even if Mace Windu hadn't been too busy with his new duties to
sit on the Council, he would not have been experienced enough
to understand what had just happened. His own rigid views often
led him to believe that others shared his inflexible standards.
Of one thing Master Yoda had no doubt. Mace Windu would
certainly never have stood before the Jedi Council and told
such an unmitigated lie.
They hit pay dirt on Ogitrev almost immediately. Daen and
Obi-Wan had set off early, leaving Valerin behind on the
transport, watching them go with ill-concealed anxiety.
The very first cantina they entered was packed to the brim with
pirates. Daen and Obi-Wan both recognised the captains of the
two pirate ships immediately from the descriptions they had
been given. Both men looked up from their table at the same
time to see two Jedi bearing down on them, and were immediately
spooked.
One made a run for it towards the back entrance, the other drew
a blaster. Daen chased the one who had fled, while Obi-Wan drew
his saber to deflect the blaster bolts. The cantina became
instant bedlam. The pirate had friends who all drew *their*
blasters, and Obi-Wan was quickly outnumbered. Patrons fled,
some wounded by the blaster fire that flooded the dingy bar.
Obi-Wan's lightsaber deflected many of the bolts back to their
origins, taking out a number of the pirates, and the rest took
cover. In the dark room, amidst the screams of bystanders and
the din of breaking glass and furniture, the pirates panicked
and began shooting wildly. Obi-Wan dived behind a fallen table
for cover, to avoid being shot by blasters or trampled on by
the fleeing patrons.
Outside the cantina Daen was also in trouble. The pirate who
had fled had called out to his own crew, who immediately
spilled onto the crowded street from other cantinas. Daen's
lightsaber made fast work of two pirates who physically
attacked him, but there were still a large number of blasters
shooting at him, and with little cover in the street, it would
only be a matter of time before one of the shots found its
mark.
Inside the cantina, Obi-Wan crawled out from under the table,
and made his way slowly to the door. After the first panic had
subsided, the pirates began to work together, and Obi-Wan's
position suddenly became far more critical. Their leader called
out for them to cover the entrance to which Obi-Wan was
heading, and others cautiously came from behind their hiding
places to search.
In Obi-Wan's favour was the almost non-existent lighting in the
place and the plethora of dead bodies that littered the scene.
Most had the tell-tale red bandanna that placed them on the
pirate's crew, but there were many civilians amongst the dead
and wounded. Obi-Wan made his way steadily for the exit. He had
liberated a blaster from one of the dead pirates and he was
slowly but surely picking them off one by one.
Outside in the street, Daen had finally been left with
absolutely no cover at all as the pirates swarmed from the
cantinas and attacked. He used the Force to leap some forty
feet in the air to the top of the building he'd been backed
against, and gained some breathing room. His lightsaber was an
excellent weapon under most conditions but using it now would
make him nothing more than an easy target for the pirates who
were shooting at him.
The building stood alone, unfortunately, so there were no roofs
near enough for Daen to leap to. Half a mile away, he could see
the Cantina where he and Obi-Wan had been separated and Daen
hoped desperately that Obi-Wan had managed to escape. The
pirates were smashing down the doors in to the building he was
on. They would be on the roof with him any minute now.
Half a mile away Obi-Wan ducked another blaster shot, wincing
as the shattering glass behind him showered over his head. He
was less than three feet from the doorway. Summoning one final
effort, Obi-Wan rose from his hiding place, turned and sprinted
with Force-enhanced speed to the doorway. Having gained the
exit, he immediately shoved the doors shut and used his 'saber
to melt the heavy bars, sealing the entrance. The pirates
screamed abuse from the inside, some going as far as to try and
blast their way out, but nothing could penetrate the thick
material of the cantina doors. Knowing the pirates would
quickly find the back exit, Obi-Wan ran like hell towards the
main street.
He rounded a corner and froze against the side of a building,
horrified at the sight before him. Daen was on the top of a
building, clearly in the sights of the twenty or so pirates and
crew that were taking pot shots at him with their blasters.
Still more were smashing their way into the building and would
no doubt be on the roof in moments.
As Obi-Wan started forward to get to Daen, one of the blaster
shots found its mark. Obi-Wan watched, horrified, as Daen was
thrown backwards by the force of the blast, and disappeared off
the top of the building, to fall the forty or so feet to the
ground.
"No!" Obi-Wan whispered in despair. With the help of the Force,
a fall like that would be negligible, but Daen had been shot
with a blaster only seconds before and would never have been
able to concentrate enough to stop his fall. If the blaster
shot didn't kill him, the fall certainly would have.
Obi-Wan looked around him, sinking back into the shadows as he
watched to see what would happen. The pirates were cheering and
shouting, seemingly undisturbed at the sight of their dead
comrades strewn all over the street. Daen had taken a lot of
them with him.
From behind him, Obi-Wan could hear the sounds of the pirates
he'd sealed in the cantina finding their way out to join the
other crew in the street. They would be looking for him, too.
Obi-Wan wanted badly to retrieve Daen's body, but it was
impossible with them all milling about. He turned to head back
to the ship and came face to face with the leader of the pirate
crew from the cantina. The man grinned evilly and the block of
wood he had raised above his head came smashing down and
Obi-Wan knew no more.
Valerin had known something was going to go wrong. He'd had a
bad feeling ever since they had landed, but Daen had ignored
his warnings.
Valerin hadn't wasted any time after they had left. He still
had his own contacts, after all. It had taken time to get in
touch with an old friend, but it was worth it. What Valerin
discovered made his blood run cold. There wasn't just a group
of three or four pirates on the planet, there were two full
crews drinking in the town. If Obi-Wan and Daen stumbled across
them, unprepared, they would be killed before they even had a
chance to draw their lightsabers.
He didn't waste any time. Packing a blaster and some credits,
Valerin found his way to the main docking bay and paid for the
use of a speeder. Daen and Obi-Wan had been on foot, so he
wouldn't be too far behind them when he got to the town. All he
could hope for was that the first cantina or two they searched
were free of pirates.
Valerin could hear the blaster fire from a distance as he sped
towards the city and he swore furiously. It seemed he was too
late, after all. As Valerin turned the speeder into one of the
main streets, something made him glance upwards. Daen Koran,
Jedi Master, had deflected a blaster bolt, but another escaped
his guard and before Valerin's horrified gaze Daen was thrown
backwards off the top of the building. He plummeted more than
forty feet towards the ground a hundred feet from where Valerin
was.
It was pure instinct that saved Daen's life. Not his instinct,
though - Valerin's. The years of training kicked in
automatically and Valerin reached out with the Force to provide
a cushion of air that caught the falling body and lowered it
gently to the ground. Within seconds the speeder was hovering
beside Daen's body. Valerin picked up the Jedi Master with a
grunt of effort and a tad more use of the Force and put him in
the passenger seat.
Leaping into the driver's seat, Valerin gunned the engine and
sped away just as a bunch of pirates crashed through the back
door of the building and spilled out into the street.
Obi-Wan came to pretty quickly, considering the blow he'd
taken. He regained consciousness to find himself inside one of
the cantinas. Judging from the relative neatness of the
establishment, it wasn't the one he and Daen had found the
pirates in. Obi-Wan swallowed his grief at the thought of Daen,
lying lifeless in a grimy street on this miserable planet. He
drew a deep breath then to calm himself. This was not the time
to think about Daen.
Instead, Obi-Wan took stock. He was relatively uninjured - a
few cuts and bruises, nothing else. His head hurt terribly from
the blow it had taken a short while before. He was strung up
against a wall to the side of the cantina, facing the bar area.
Obi-Wan's arms were stretched apart and tied high above his
head, the ropes cutting into his wrists painfully. When he
opened his eyes he could the pirate who had attacked him
brandishing his lightsaber. The pirate had ignited it and was
waving it about, much to the loud amusement of his comrades.
With dismay, Obi-Wan noted that the cantina was quite full, and
the chairs and tables had all been turned around to face what
was usually a blank wall.
Only today there was a Jedi Padawan tied to the wall like some
eccentric form of decoration.
One of the crew noted Obi-Wan's return to consciousness with a
shout and all attention was now turned on him. The pirate
leader came toward him with a nasty grin, still carrying the
lit 'saber.
"You know," he said loudly, waiting for the crew to quiet
before continuing, "I've always wanted to see just what kind of
damage a toy like this could do."
The pirates found his announcement incredibly amusing, if the
cheering and catcalls were anything to go by. Obi-Wan met the
taunting look with a calm gaze. He wouldn't break down in front
of this rabble. Certainly, to be tortured to death with his own
lightsaber would not have been his first choice, but if the
Force willed it, then so be it. If he had to die, then at least
he would die with the knowledge that he had been loved by
Qui-Gon Jinn.
The pirate seemed disappointed that Obi-Wan would not rise to
his taunts and insults, but too soon he decided to give the
'saber his attention.
"You and your friend killed 31 of our number. That's 31 lives I
have to take out of your hide."
Obi-Wan's voice remained rock steady.
"I think you'll find a good number of them were killed by your
own men. I saw at least four go down under blaster fire before
I even got a hold of a blaster myself. You were killing each
other."
There was a murmur of disquiet at his pronouncement. Whatever
hijacking skills he had, the pirate leader clearly lacked in
people skills. He turned to the crowd in anger.
"Shut up, you idiots. If it wasn't for me you'd all be dead and
this one would have gotten away."
He turned the 'saber towards Obi-Wan and the familiar blue
light hummed only inches from Obi-Wan's face.
"Let's see how you like being on the business end of one of
these."
With a surprisingly precise movement, he swept the lightsaber
down Obi-Wan's left side, leaving a streak of sheer, burning
agony in its path. Too much deeper and the 'saber would have
burnt through skin and organs, but this light touch was enough
to cause immense pain without actually killing him.
As the crowd erupted in cheers and whistles, Obi-Wan wondered
how long it would take him to die.
When Daen awoke he was lying in his bed onboard 'Consequences'.
His shoulder felt like it was on fire, but aside from that
there didn't seem to be any major injuries. He turned to find
Valerin adjusting the controls on a portable bacta pact that
was providing the burning sensation in his shoulder as it
healed the nasty wound.
Memory returned in that instant.
"Where's Obi-Wan?" he demanded.
Valerin continued keying in the sequence to the bacta pack,
apparently unconcerned at Obi-Wan's continued absence.
"I couldn't get to him. The street was filled with pirates -
there were two entire crews drinking in cantinas all along the
street. The ones you didn't kill were all armed and looking for
a fight."
In grief and anger at himself, Daen lashed out.
"You just left him there?"
Valerin looked up then, and Daen was immediately silenced.
There were tears in Valerin's eyes and his face was white as he
struggled with his own personal hell. He opened his mouth to
answer, but nothing came out. Daen could see him trying hard
not to break down and his anger left him immediately.
"I'm sorry, Valerin. That was totally unfair. You saved my
life, and you're right - if you'd gone back for Obi-Wan all
three of us would be dead."
Valerin nodded dumbly, swallowing hard. He looked about ten
years old. Daen sat up slowly, so as not to disturb the bacta
pack attached to his shoulder, and swung his legs over the side
of the bed. He pulled an unresisting Valerin towards him so
that Val was sitting beside him on the bed, and then he put his
arms around Valerin and hugged him to his uninjured shoulder.
One hand went up to stroke Valerin's hair as the pilot broke
down and sobbed with grief at the loss of his best friend.
After a time, Valerin pulled away, visibly struggling to
collect himself. Daen found himself wanting badly to give
Valerin some sort of comfort. He reached out and gently brushed
evidence of Valerin's tears away from the younger man's face.
"I have to go back, Val. I can't leave Obi-Wan's body there."
The words were so hard to say. Beautiful Obi-Wan, dead. Daen
didn't even want to think about what the news would do to
Qui-Gon. Valerin stood up, determination written on his face.
"Fine. I still have the speeder. We can go now."
Daen stood, too, warily contemplating the determined young
pilot.
"There's no need …"
Valerin cut him off impatiently.
"Don't even bother saying it, Daen. You can walk to the town
centre if you want to, but I'm going by speeder to bring
Obi-Wan's body back here. If you want to come with me, you're
welcome to. I am quite capable of looking after myself, you
know." The defensiveness was back in his tone.
Daen smiled wryly. "And me too, it would seem. Thank you for
saving my life, Valerin. I would be grateful if you would help
me retrieve Obi-Wan's body."
The formal phrasing suited the circumstances. This was a task
neither wanted, and there would be plenty of time to grieve in
the future. But perhaps they could grieve for Obi-Wan together.
Only minutes later, the speeder's engine hummed as it sped
towards the centre of the town.
As Daen and Valerin were boarding the speeder, Obi-Wan was
calculating how much longer he had to live. He now had two more
matching stripes of agony along his torso, and another down the
side of one leg, but it wasn't those that threatened his life
the most. The pirate had been drinking steadily and each swipe
was a fraction deeper, a little less precise.
Obi-Wan breathed in deeply, concentrating on the Force and
nothing more. The pirates were all armed, and no amount of
skill was going to get him out of here alive should he take
them all on. But then, he was a Jedi Padawan and he certainly
wasn't going to stand here and let them slice him up with his
own lightsaber. The restraints around his wrists and ankles
would be a simple matter, then it was a choice of going for his
lightsaber, or one of the blasters in near reach. No choice,
really. If he had to die, he'd do it with his lightsaber in
hand.
Obi-Wan marshaled his resources, breathed in one more time, and
summoned the Force for his final assault.
The pirate took a large swallow, swayed drunkenly on his feet
as he turned to face Obi-Wan again, and raised the 'saber one
more time to the cheers of the pirate crew. He slashed
downwards blindly, but where he slashed, Obi-Wan no longer
stood. The restraints were empty, and the wall was scored with
a scorch mark so deep it would literally have cut Obi-Wan in
two had he remained in place.
It took a second for the crowd to realise what had happened,
but by then it was too late. Obi-Wan had his lightsaber in
hand, and the leader of the pirates was lying dead on the
floor. Obi-Wan leapt to the top of a table, slashing as he
went. A dozen were dead before the first of them even got a
blaster shot clear. Obi-Wan leapt into the air, turning a
mid-air somersault that put him suddenly in the midst of the
pirates, and his 'saber took another three out.
More of them had blasters out now, but Obi-Wan had learned his
lesson from the first cantina. Unfortunately for the pirates,
none of them had. They shot blindly, following the Jedi Padawan
as he vaulted through the air, and ducked and dived between
them. More pirates shot their own crew than Obi-Wan could
possibly hope to kill, and yet, despite the pandemonium,
Obi-Wan knew he was still far too outnumbered to survive. The
entire fight had taken less than two minutes and, looking
around him, Obi-Wan calculated that he had about another sixty
seconds to live.
The exits were blocked by pirates everywhere, and blaster fire
turned the already smoky tavern into a fiery hell. As Obi-Wan
glanced around him to find a place to make his final stand, a
giant section of roof came crashing down into the room,
bringing with it a bright stream of sunlight. The great chunk
of ceiling collapsed on top of several of the pirates, and
without a second thought Obi-Wan leapt onto the block of wood
and rock, and used the Force to propel himself upwards, through
the hole in the roof, and to safety.
He was momentarily blinded by the sudden sunlight after the
smoky darkness of the tavern, and he stumbled. He would have
fallen, if not for the strong hand that took his arm to steady
him.
"Can you run, Obi-Wan?"
The urgent question didn't surprise him, and somehow neither
did the sight of the man holding him. Who else would it have
been?
Obi-Wan sighed with happiness.
"Yes, Master."
Qui-Gon led him quickly to the edge of the building. They
jumped off as one, using the Force to land safely on ground.
Qui-Gon could hear the hum of a speeder heading for the street
they were in.
"This way, Obi-Wan."
The two sped off at Force-enhanced speed, leaving their
pursuers behind quickly. Moments later they ran almost in front
of the speeder being driven by Daen.
"Qui-Gon?" "Obi-Wan!"
Neither Daen nor Valerin hesitated for a moment, despite the
appearance of a Jedi Master two systems away and a dead man.
The two leapt into the speeder which once again made its escape
from the city and headed for Valerin's ship.
Arista was waiting impatiently when they returned to
'Consequences', but was ignored by the group as they boarded
the ship and set course out of the system. Within a short time
the ship was safely away from the planet.
Qui-Gon had carried Obi-Wan onboard the ship, and had allowed
Valerin to lead him to Obi-Wan's room and provide him with
another portable bacta unit. Arista had followed Valerin inside
the room. Daen had taken the pilot's seat and was getting the
ship as far away from Ogitrev as possible.
"What's happened? Is that Obi-Wan? Don't tell me he's injured
himself *again*?"
Qui-Gon ignored her completely, busily tending to Obi-Wan.
Valerin gave Arista a disgusted glance before physically
removing her from the room. He closed the door behind them and
keyed in the privacy lock.
"I am on this mission with Qui-Gon, thank you very much,
Valerin. I don't even know what you're doing here but you have
no right…"
Valerin interrupted her as she was building up steam.
"Shut up, Arista."
He turned and headed for the cockpit, taking the co-pilot's
seat next to Daen as Arista came storming in after him.
"You can't tell me to shut up, Valerin. Who do you think you
are, anyway?"
Her diatribe cut off as she got a good look at the pilot of the
ship.
Daen turned to face the angry female. Of course. The bitchy
Padawan who had made Obi-Wan's life a misery at the Temple.
Never let it be said that Master Yoda didn't have a sense of
humour. Daen turned on the charm and noticed the immediate
effect it had on Arista.
"It's Arista, isn't it? You were at the Temple last time I was
there. I'm Daen Koran."
Arista practically purred at the attention.
"Master Koran - I had no idea you were here."
Daen smiled.
"And I had no idea Qui-Gon had been so lucky in the assignment
of his research assistant."
Valerin snorted audibly with disgust and rolled his eyes. At
Daen's inquiring glance he rose from the co-pilot's chair and
stormed from the room. Arista wasted no time in taking his
place.
Qui-Gon Jinn took a damp cloth and gently cleaned Obi-Wan's
face. His Padawan had been showered in dust when he'd come
through the opening in the roof of the building, and he was
filthy. Qui-Gon had added a Force-induced suggestion to get
Obi-Wan to sleep deeply while he cleaned him up and treated his
wounds.
He couldn't allow Obi-Wan to wake up and find him here. The
Council had been firm on that point - although how he had come
to be on the very planet Daen and Obi-Wan were investigating
was something he would have to take up with Yoda.
In his concern over Obi-Wan's condition, one very obvious point
completely escaped Qui-Gon's attention. Of all the Jedi
currently on missions, of all the ships available for hire, of
all the Padawans keen for mission experience at the Temple -
what were the odds that one mission would bring together the
only three lovers Obi-Wan had ever been with, and a bitch from
his past who represented every insecure thought he'd ever had?
Daen and Valerin could both suspect Master Yoda's hand in this
and even Arista was starting to have her own suspicions, but
Qui-Gon Jinn remained oblivious.
It was clear even before they had landed at Ogitrev that this
was the pirate's lair. Qui-Gon's small ship, with it's very
distinctive Jedi markings, had been a target from the moment he
had entered the planet's atmosphere. Qui-Gon had been given
permission to land, but the moment he and Arista had exited
their ship they had been attacked by a small number of pirates.
Qui-Gon had pushed Arista to the ground, drawn his 'saber and
returned the blaster shots before Arista had even time to
squeal in indignation at the rough handling. He had bundled her
to a safe position behind some crates and had given her strict
instructions not to move. It hadn't taken long to deal with the
pirates who had attacked. From the looks of it, the majority of
the two crews were drinking in town, and these few had been
left to watch over the ships.
Arista hadn't even attempted to help. Her lightsaber remained
attached to her belt and Qui-Gon spared a moment when he
returned to wonder if she knew how to use the damn thing.
Their own ship had been destroyed deliberately by the blaster
fire from the pirates. They should have concentrated on taking
out the Jedi, but their intent had clearly been to see that he
did not take off again. As he surveyed his little ship, Qui-Gon
surmised ruefully that there was little likelihood of it flying
again.
He entered the broken little ship one more time to grab a pair
of view-finders. There were several hundred ships docked in the
bay, and it would take too long to explore them all. The
pirates were no danger for the moment, but he was left with the
problem of finding somewhere safe to stow Arista while he went
into town.
He saw it then. A neat little ship, about two miles distant. An
adjustment to the view-finder and Qui-Gon could see the subtle
Jedi markings along the hull. They wouldn't be instantly
visible unless you knew what to look for, which was why this
little ship had escaped the wrath of the pirates. But this was
clearly a vessel that had been used by Jedi in the past.
Qui-Gon handed the view-finders to Arista, pointed out the ship
'Consequences', and gave her strict instructions.
He would find a speeder and head for town. It would take Arista
a while to get to the little ship, and there she could petition
the pilot for passage back to Coruscant. The self-absorbed
Padawan gave him no argument. She was clearly more interested
in getting to safety than seeing the mission through. Qui-Gon
was more than happy to see her go. He hired the speeder and set
off for the town.
Qui-Gon had seen signs of a severe battle when he'd entered the
town. Leaving the speeder parked on the outskirts, he'd moved
amongst the milling spectators, overhearing enough to know that
there had been Jedi involved. Curious, Qui-Gon had gone to the
tavern from where the loudest noise came, and had looked in the
window. What he'd seen nearly made his heart stop. Obi-Wan,
tied to the wall, being burnt with his own lightsaber. Every
protective instinct he had ever had came rushing to the fore
and Qui-Gon was on top of the building and cutting through the
roof with his lightsaber only moments later. He'd suffered a
second scare upon hearing the distinctive sounds of blaster
fire and a lightsaber at work. Thankfully, though, the ceiling
had given way just in time for Obi-Wan to leap to safety.
Adrenaline had kept Obi-Wan conscious for the journey back to
Valerin's ship, but he had said nothing. Cradled protectively
in Qui-Gon's arms, he had simply looked at his Master with a
small smile on his face. After everything Qui-Gon had put him
through, all the pain he had heaped upon Obi-Wan, his beautiful
Padawan had been pleased he was there. Qui-Gon's heart nearly
broke at the trust Obi-Wan put in him.
Now, with Obi-Wan asleep, Qui-Gon could look at his Padawan
without worrying that he was giving anything away by his
expression. Being without Obi-Wan had been like losing a limb.
Worse, because he could get over that. He could be retrained,
learn to live without an arm or a leg. But he could never be
retrained to live without Obi-Wan Kenobi. Too many times he
would turn to speak to his Padawan, to share a thought with him
- only to find Obi-Wan wasn't there. And every time he did that
was like losing Obi-Wan all over again.
Obi-Wan was finally clean again and Qui-Gon put the cloth aside
and simply sat and watched him sleep.
Valerin paced his quarters, wanting badly to kick something but
not wanting to alert Daen to the fact that he was upset.
As if Daen would care, anyway. Valerin flushed with
embarrassment at the recollection of crying in Daen's arms this
morning. Daen probably thought he was some stupid kid, losing
it like that.
Not that it mattered, anyway. Daen was hardly likely to look
twice at him. Failed Jedi Padawan, failed AirCorps pilot. So
they had one close moment - a couple of short hours later and
Daen was already flirting with that arrogant bitch, Arista. Now
*there* was one person Valerin didn't miss when he'd left the
Temple. Typical. Trust Arista to show up right now. It was the
first time Valerin had met someone he felt he could …
well, it was a stupid kid's fantasy anyway.
Valerin sighed, and left his quarters. No point obsessing about
it. He didn't want to watch Daen charm Arista into bed, so he
headed for Obi-Wan's room. Keying in the panel to release the
privacy lock, Valerin hesitated before palming the door open.
He knocked softly and waited until the door opened, then went
inside.
The portable bacta unit had already done wonders for Obi-Wan's
injuries, and Valerin's friend was asleep. Val guessed there
had been more than a touch of Force suggestion behind the
sleep, and he met Qui-Gon's gaze shyly.
His theory was confirmed when Qui-Gon made no attempt to
whisper. Obi-Wan was too deeply asleep to be disturbed by
voices.
"Hello, Valerin. How are you these days?"
It seemed so strange, talking to Qui-Gon Jinn under these
circumstances. Valerin came further into the room and took the
other chair next to Obi-Wan's bed.
"I'm okay, Master Jinn. How's Obi-Wan?"
Qui-Gon glanced at his Padawan automatically before turning his
attention back to Valerin.
"He'll be fine. And you can call me Qui-Gon if you'd like to,
Valerin."
"Thank you, ah… Qui-Gon." Valerin couldn't return the
compliment. He came from a planet where one name was the norm,
so Valerin was both his first and last name.
Politeness would dictate that he ask after Qui-Gon's health,
but Valerin could see quite clearly that Qui-Gon was not doing
well. He'd lost some weight - not much, but enough. There were
shadows under the eyes, too, but that wasn't really what stood
out the most. This wasn't the same man Valerin had known
through Obi-Wan.
They sat in companionable silence for a while as Qui-Gon
adjusted the bacta unit to complete Obi-Wan's healing.
Qui-Gon finished keying in the new sequence before turning back
to face Valerin. It had been a while since he'd last seen the
boy, and there were obvious changes.
"How did you come to own your own ship, Valerin?"
The name of the ship told its own story, but Qui-Gon was
interested in hearing the rest of it. As Valerin diffidently
told his story, Qui-Gon wondered what his re-entrance into
Obi-Wan's life would mean for his Padawan. Certainly, there
would be no lack of eager partners for Obi-Wan.
For Qui-Gon Jinn, though, nothing much had changed. Obi-Wan
would sleep for a few more hours, and Qui-Gon would watch over
him for that time. And then he would undertake the final part
of his mission, leaving before Obi-Wan awoke. Daen would
arrange for Arista's return to Coruscant and then Daen and
Obi-Wan could continue on with their lives.
He chatted with Valerin for a while, and then the younger man
left to see to his ship. Qui-Gon turned his attention back to
Obi-Wan, taking one hand and settling in to keep vigil over his
Padawan one last time.
Daen was alone in the cockpit when Valerin returned. Valerin
took the co-pilot's seat again, automatically glancing over the
panel before him.
"Don't worry, I haven't hurt your precious ship." Daen's voice
was light.
Valerin glanced up at him, then returned his glance to the
panel in front of him.
"I didn't think you would. She has a problem in her aft fluid
coupling, though, so…"
"Don't use her thrusters to reduce the heading when she's in
subspace," Daen interrupted. "I noticed the problem and I don't
fly that way in any case. So. Finished sulking?"
Valerin looked up sharply.
"I wasn't sulking."
Daen smiled.
"Yes, you were. And beautiful as you are when you're angry,
Valerin, I think I prefer you when you're not trying to do me
an injury."
Valerin froze for a moment. Beautiful? His hopes soared for a
split second before he realised that Daen was probably just
flirting with him the same way he flirted with Arista. He said
nothing.
Daen glanced over at him.
"Still angry, then? I figured you were taking out your anger at
the entire Jedi Order on me when I first arrived, but I'd
thought we'd reached some understanding, Val."
Valerin remained silent. What was it about Daen that kept
Valerin constantly off-balance like this? He felt like a
teenager when Daen was around, tongue-tied and clumsy.
"Val? I know you and Obi-Wan slept together when he first came
onboard, but I think you know how he feels about Qui-Gon. And I
was pretty sure he hadn't broken your heart. Was I wrong?"
Daen's voice was gentle and Valerin found himself responding,
almost against his will. He turned, and as he opened his mouth
to reply he was pre-empted by a sugary voice from the door.
"Master Koran? I'm about to start evening meal for you boys and
I was hoping you'd tell me what your favourites are so I could
make them."
Daen rose from the pilot's chair and headed towards Arista.
"Of course, Arista. But you're spoiling me - after all, I don't
think everyone has the same tastes I do."
Valerin heard the lightly flirtatious tone fade as Daen left
the cockpit with Arista in eager tow. He sat alone, allowing
the ship to fly itself as it was programmed to. Stupid. Stupid,
stupid, stupid! For a brief second there …
"You are an idiot, Valerin," he whispered to himself, staring
out into space. He could hear Daen and Arista laughing together
in the kitchen and suddenly he couldn't stand it anymore. He
got up out of the co-pilot's chair and went to his quarters.
Stupid, stupid, stupid.
Daen frowned as he saw Valerin storm off to his quarters, but
the expression cleared instantly as Arista turned her fawning
gaze to him.
"I would *love* to make Vinari Soufflé for you, Master
Koran," she simpered.
Daen smiled down at her, his attention already elsewhere.
"Please, Arista, call me Daen. And I couldn't possibly ask you
to do that - the Soufflés are enormously difficult to
cook and would take far too much of your time."
"Oh, no," Arista gushed. "Qui-Gon doesn't have anything for me
to do and it would be my pleasure. Truly."
"Thank you, Arista. I admit, it's been many years since I've
had a Vinari Soufflé and I can't wait to taste yours."
Daen gave a thought to Qui-Gon's expression when this conceited
little tart called him 'Qui-Gon' to his face, instead of Master
Jinn. The humour bought a gleam to his eyes and Arista visibly
melted. Daen leaned down as though to share a particularly
personal secret.
"I have to go fly the ship, Arista, but I'll see you at
dinner."
She looked chagrined that he wouldn't be bearing her company
during the meal preparations, but Daen was already on his way
out of the kitchen. As he passed through the main room he saw
Qui-Gon leave Obi-Wan's quarters.
Qui-Gon looked tired.
"Obi-Wan's sleeping normally now. I thought I'd check if there
was anything that needed doing. I don't have anything further
to do to prepare for the rest of the mission, so I'm free to
pilot if you need me."
Daen thought quickly. Qui-Gon obviously still didn't know that
the Council had changed his mission, and was still acting under
the impression that he was forbidden by the Council to see
Obi-Wan. And there was the matter of his relationship with
Obi-Wan. Still, the ship wouldn't reach the nearest planet for
another full day, and Obi-Wan was in no condition to repair his
relationship with his Master.
And there was Valerin to think of.
"Actually, if you could pilot for the next couple of hours,
that would be great. The course is already set and the
auto-pilot is on, but I need to talk some things through with
Valerin and I could really use some privacy. The cockpit will
be a nice, quiet place for the next few hours if you need to
meditate."
Qui-Gon nodded.
"Then that's where I'll be."
Daen watched him leave and determined that before this ship
landed on the next planet, he would sort out the problems
between Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan. But first things first.
Valerin looked up in surprise as Daen entered his quarters
unannounced, and Daen could almost see the invisible shields
that slammed into place.
Valerin looked angry.
"Don't bother knocking, or anything."
Daen sat on a seat next to the bed and removed one of his
boots.
"Thank you, I won't."
Valerin watched him remove the other boot with a raised
eyebrow.
"I thought you were busy with Arista. What are you doing?"
Daen had risen from the seat and was in the process of removing
his sash.
"I wanted to keep her busy. She's currently working on a Vinari
Soufflé, which takes something like four hours to
prepare. And what I'm doing is removing my tunic. You could
help, if you wanted to."
The temperature in the room seemed to rise slightly and Valerin
swallowed.
"Help?" he parroted blankly, transfixed as Daen removed his
outer tunic in entirety and began removing the inner one.
Daen grinned.
"If that was a plea for assistance, I think you're going to
have to be louder than that."
Valerin met Daen's eyes then and his breath caught at the look
of desire he saw in them. His arousal was getting to an
uncomfortable stage and when Daen had stripped down to just his
leggings, Valerin's eyes wandered slowly over the lean, muscled
form in front of him. He licked suddenly dry lips and then the
gorgeous body was right there, in front of him. He looked up to
meet Daen's eyes and then Daen kissed him.
Their mouths met and opened immediately, tongues gaining access
and Valerin groaned into Daen's mouth as he tasted and was
tasted in turn. Their bodies met and Valerin's hands roamed
Daen's naked torso as they kissed passionately. They fit
together. Valerin was no blushing virgin and he'd had his share
of women and men, but always he'd been the pursuer, the
seducer. He wasn't a small man, being both tall and quite
muscular, but Daen eclipsed him for sheer height and strength
and Valerin was dazed by how good it felt to have someone else
call the shots for a change.
How long they kissed was anybody's guess, but Valerin was eager
to feel Daen's erection against him so the leggings were next
to go and then Daen stood naked before him. Valerin could only
gape in pure sensual amazement at the feast before him until
one thought caught his attention.
"I should get naked," he murmured, dazed.
Daen laughed softly. "Oh yes, you really should, Val." He
reached for Valerin and began removing his clothes.
Within moments the shirt was gone, followed by the pants. There
was a short interruption as Valerin kicked off his boots, which
fortunately weren't the knee high works of art the Jedi wore.
Not soon enough they were both naked and Daen was leading them
to Valerin's bed and they were kissing again and touching and
it felt better than it had ever felt with anyone before.
Valerin groaned as Daen made a meal of his neck. He pushed up
against the warm body that lay the length of his, thrusting
instinctively. When Daen's hand slid between his legs Valerin
gave a cry of pleasure. It felt so good. Daen's mouth traversed
Valerin's body, sucking, licking and biting as he went. Valerin
was on fire, moaning with pleasure as Daen moved ever
downwards.
Too soon Valerin was at the peak. Daen's warm mouth surrounded
his overheated flesh and he stiffened and came with a groan of
pure delight. Daen swallowed the fluid and continued to kiss
and lick him until Valerin pulled away, his flesh too sensitive
for further stimulation. But then there was Daen to think of
and Valerin grinned with the pure joy of it as he glanced over
to the desk on the far side of the room where the lubricant was
stashed in a drawer. Concentrating, he used the Force to open
the drawer and call the lubricant to his waiting hand.
Daen laughed at Valerin's triumphant grin.
"Show off."
Valerin gasped as an invisible pressure invaded his body,
stretching him for Daen's entry, massing his internal muscles
until he groaned with desire and hardened again under Daen's
hot gaze.
"Now who's showing off?" Valerin gasped. He spread his legs
willingly as Daen ran one hand appreciatively up his inner
thigh. Daen sat up then and took the lubricant from Valerin's
slack grasp, coating his own hard length with it. Returning to
lie between Valerin's legs, Daen positioned himself carefully
at the entrance to Valerin's body before pushing in slowly.
Valerin had raised his knees to provide better access and
wrapped them around Daen's waist.
Once Daen was fully sheathed he had to concentrate on his own
body to stop himself thrusting blindly into the welcoming heat
that surrounded him.
Valerin was no help.
"Now, Daen - fuck me, please!"
Daen began to thrust, slowly at first but then with ever
increasing speed and Valerin was sobbing with pleasure and
begging him not to stop but it was too much and Daen felt his
body tightening with impending orgasm before his stiffened and
thrust hard one more time, coming inside Valerin with his own
shout of triumph.
After getting his breath back, Daen pulled out of Valerin
carefully and slumped to his side in the bed. The two kissed
and touched and petted for a long time, saying nothing.
After all, what needed to be said?
The evening meal was something to remember. Obi-Wan slept
through it, Arista flirted with Daen, Daen flirted with Valerin
and Qui-Gon sat silent throughout. Both Jedi treated Arista
with courtesy, but Daen no longer flirted with her. He never
forgot the delight she had taken in taunting Obi-Wan when they
were at the Temple together. Arista didn't seem to notice
Daen's inattention. But then, there didn't seem to be much that
could dent the incredible self-conceit of Arista G'effen.
Qui-Gon watched Daen and Valerin and quickly came to the
correct conclusion that the two were lovers. It worried him.
When he was gone, who would be with Obi-Wan? As it was, it
would be difficult to avoid seeing Obi-Wan when he awoke, on a
ship this size. But the Council had ruled and to go against the
Council's edict was to destroy Obi-Wan's future in the Jedi.
As soon as the meal was ended, Valerin headed for the cockpit
to check how his ship was handling the journey. Qui-Gon asked
Daen if they could discuss the mission somewhere in private,
leaving Arista to clean up from dinner with bad grace.
Daen took Qui-Gon to his own room, and a stray thought occurred
to him as he entered.
"I'm going to move my things into Valerin's room, Qui-Gon.
Arista can stay in here. You'd better stay in Obi-Wan's room."
Qui-Gon shook his head.
"I can't do that, Daen. The Council have ordered me to stay
away from Obi-Wan. I'll stay in here with you."
"Leaving Arista to sleep with Valerin? They'd kill each other
before morning." Daen stalled for time as he searched for a way
to tell Qui-Gon about the Council's reversal of their decision.
Qui-Gon sighed, accepting that point.
"All right. Then I'll stay with Valerin and you can bunk with
Obi-Wan."
"Can't do that. Valerin and I have got something going ,
Qui-Gon. Something serious, I hope. I can't let him think I've
just used him."
Qui-Gon frowned.
"And what about Obi-Wan? The two of you are the best friends he
has in the world. What's going to happen to him when I'm
…" he broke off the sentence then, looking away as Daen
viewed him mockingly.
"When you're what, Qui-Gon?"
Qui-Gon's mouth thinned in anger as he watched Daen carry his
bag and head for Valerin's quarters. Qui-Gon followed. When the
door closed behind them, Qui-Gon spoke again.
"I received word from the Ogitrev authorities before dinner.
They've arrested the rest of the pirate crews and neither
leader of the two ships lived. All that's left is to find out
who financed them and see that justice is done. You and Obi-Wan
can take Arista back to Coruscant. I'll go on alone."
Daen had been busily unpacking his things as Qui-Gon spoke but
now he straightened and met Qui-Gon's eyes. Time to face the
music.
"I think you'd better check in with Master Yoda before you make
any major decisions, Qui-Gon."
Qui-Gon looked confused, but it was the familiar look on Daen's
face that set off the alarm bells in his mind.
"Why? What did you do, Daen?"
Daen grinned apologetically.
"Well …" And told him.
"You told them what?!" Qui-Gon was shocked to the very core of
his Jedi soul.
"I told them you and Obi-Wan were soul-bonded. It was the only
way I could get them to reverse their previous decision. The
Council can't interfere in a soul-bond and their policy is to
allow soul-bonded partners to work together." Daen explained
patiently.
"You lied to the Council?"
The question was equal parts awe and disbelief. Daen found
himself laughing.
"Don't be a hypocrite, Qui-Gon. It's not like you've never done
it. The point is, a life-bond can be reversed. A soul-bond is a
whole different matter. And you and Obi-Wan have enough
problems without the Council trying to separate you as well.
But if you're worried about my slipping moral standards, then I
suggest you do your best to avoid making a liar out of me."
Qui-Gon was lost for words. Daen took pity on him and patted
his shoulder in a fatherly manner.
"Try to concentrate, Qui-Gon. You. Obi-Wan. Soul-bond. Just
keep those things in mind and you'll do fine."
With that he left the room, laughing softly to himself. It was
truly lucky that Qui-Gon Jinn was so good looking because he
could be incredibly dim at times.
Qui-Gon was put through to Master Yoda's quarters so quickly he
harboured a suspicion that his communication was expected.
"Master Yoda." Qui-Gon paused, unsure where to start.
"A problem you have, Padawan?" It had been a long time since he
had been called that and Qui-Gon smiled despite himself.
"Yes, Master. Daen told the Council I had a soul-bond with
Obi-Wan. He was … mistaken, Master." No point getting
Daen into trouble. "I do not share a soul-bond with Obi-Wan."
Yoda nodded sagely, seeming amused.
"So sure, are you?"
Qui-Gon frowned in puzzlement. It was hardly something one
could miss.
"Yes, Master."
"Always in motion, the future is. Soul-bond today, perhaps not.
Soul-bond tomorrow…..?" And Yoda shrugged his shoulders
as if to say, 'who knows?'
Qui-Gon stared at his Master for a long moment. Deep inside him
a ray of hope began to spread. Before it could melt the ice
that encased his heart, though, he had to clear up another
problem.
"Master, I have a mission to attend to. I have to discover who
financed the pirates and bring them to justice."
"Hmm. Found them already we have. Forgot to tell you, I did."
Qui-Gon frowned suspiciously.
"You forgot to tell me?"
Yoda seemed affronted.
"When nine hundred years old *you* are, forget some things you
will, too. Yes. Soul-bond with Obi-Wan tomorrow, you will. Make
liar of Daen you will not."
The last vestige of ice melted away and Qui-Gon took a deep
breath for the first time in what seemed like years. The future
suddenly looked hopeful. And definitely longer than the future
he had planned yesterday. He smiled at Yoda.
"I love you, Master."
Yoda chuckled.
"Mm! But love Obi-Wan more, I think you do. Yes!" he said
triumphantly, poking his stick at the viewscreen. Qui-Gon
laughed helplessly.
"Speaking of Daen, Master - there is one more favour I have to
ask you."
Obi-Wan had woken while the rest of the group were eating
dinner. He had a quick shower, then went back to bed and dozed
for a while afterwards. For the rest of the time he thought
about Qui-Gon and his future.
Valerin dropped in with a plate of food some time later to find
Obi-Wan sitting up, looking very healthy. He helped the Padawan
remove the last of the bacta pads and checked him out
clinically.
"You look fit enough to wrestle a gundark."
Obi-Wan smiled.
"I'm hungry enough to eat one at the moment. Whatever that is,
give it to me, Val. I don't want to have to injure you after
all you've been through."
Valerin laughed and handed him the plate, filling him in on
what had happened after he and Daen had been separated.
Obi-Wan finished eating and put the plate aside.
"So I wasn't imagining it, huh? Qui-Gon really is here."
Valerin watched him carefully.
"Yep. He carried you onboard, bought you here, set up the bacta
units. Then sat watching over you the way he used to. I came in
while you were sleeping and we had a chat. Kind of ironic,
really, considering the last time we spoke."
Obi-Wan grimaced as he, too, recalled the last time Qui-Gon had
seen Valerin. He took a long look at his friend, then, and a
slow smile came over his face.
"So. It looks like my little adventure wasn't the only exciting
thing happening, huh?"
To Obi-Wan's delight, Valerin actually blushed.
"Yeah, well. I hope you're okay with it, Obi-Wan because, well,
I kind of think it's serious between Daen and me."
"Well, isn't that just too adorable."
Arista's words dripped with venom. She entered the room without
permission and stood sneering at Obi-Wan and Valerin.
"You two are pathetic, you know that? After all this time he's
*still* lusting after Qui-Gon and *you're* making a fool of
yourself over whoever will pay attention to you."
Valerin looked her up and down and shook his head in amazement.
Arista G'effen was a breathtakingly beautiful woman. And a
complete bitch.
"I can't even begin to imagine how our relationships could be
any of your business, Arista," Valerin spoke coldly.
"You're such a fool, Valerin. I was *personally requested* for
this assignment. I was told that the Jedi Council are
considering partnering me permanently with another Jedi Master.
It makes sense, after all. My Master is on the Council and
doesn't have time to take me on missions." She lied with
absolute confidence, and managed by sheer luck to score a
direct hit on the sole area Valerin wasn't confident of.
Obi-Wan wondered if the Council were considering partnering her
with Qui-Gon. He wasn't as worried as Valerin, though, because
he knew his Master well enough to know that Qui-Gon wouldn't
put up with Arista for any longer than he had to, and certainly
wouldn't accept her as a permanent partner. Qui-Gon would
prefer to work alone, but Obi-Wan was determined he wouldn't
have that chance, either.
Arista smiled triumphantly as she saw Valerin's eyes. He wasn't
quite as confident of his future with Daen as he made out. That
just left Kenobi. Through some quirk of nature Arista had hated
Obi-Wan Kenobi from the moment she had laid eyes on him. Before
Obi-Wan had come along Arista had been the talented initiate,
destined for greatness. But her years as a Padawan had been one
long stream of watching Obi-Wan take all the prizes, Obi-Wan
win all the awards. Obi-Wan with his famous Master and his
glittering future. She wanted to hurt him.
"And don't dream for a minute that you're going to get back
with Qui-Gon, Obi-Wan. I heard Daen talking to Valerin
yesterday. The second Qui-Gon hears that you jumped into bed
with Valerin not two days ago he's going to dump you for good.
Like he's wanted to do ever since he took pity on you and took
you as his Padawan."
Obi-Wan rose from the bed and calmly tidied himself, running a
quick hand through his short air and neatening his tunic.
Arista was taken aback. That familiar flash of pain hadn't
crossed his expression. She was used to that hurt look. It was
one she enjoyed seeing and over the years had worked hard to
ensure she saw it a lot.
Not this time, though. Obi-Wan gave her a sweet smile.
"Come on, then."
He walked to the door and headed for the main room, followed
closely by Arista and Valerin. When he walked in to the main
room the first thing he saw was Qui-Gon Jinn sitting at the
table with Daen. Obi-Wan came to stand before Qui-Gon, looking
down at his seated Master with an expression of calm serenity.
"Master? I slept with Valerin two nights ago. I wanted you to
know that because I don't ever intend keeping anything from you
ever again. And as that was the last time I'll ever sleep with
anyone else but you, I thought it was a significant moment in
my life."
Qui-Gon considered the confession gravely, but his eyes held
amusement.
"Thank you for your honesty, Padawan. I, too, have a confession
to make."
There was a collective holding of breath around the room as
Qui-Gon rose and took Obi-Wan's hands in his.
"I love you, Obi-Wan Kenobi, and I wish to soul-bond with you.
And, if you will permit, I will spend every day for the rest of
our lives making you happy."
There was surely no sight more beautiful than that of Obi-Wan
Kenobi's cheeky grin and the blaze of love in his eyes as he
replied.
"Yes, Master."
The momentum that had bought them from the crowded main room
and into Obi-Wan's quarters left them suddenly once they were
alone. Qui-Gon looked unsure of himself.
Obi-Wan reached out a hand to touch his Master, but was
stopped. Before Obi-Wan had time to feel rejected Qui-Gon took
the hand that had reached to him, bought it to his lips and
kissed it gently. Obi-Wan could see that Qui-Gon needed to talk
before they went any further, and he waited patiently. It was
strange to see Qui-Gon Jinn without his usual air of
self-assurance but for perhaps the first time in his life,
Obi-Wan felt confident enough for them both. Qui-Gon Jinn loved
him. That was all he needed to know.
As Qui-Gon hesitated, Obi-Wan had moved closer to him and was
even now twining hands around his neck and running fingers
through his hair. Obi-Wan pressed soft kisses along Qui-Gon's
bearded jaw line, and down his neck, pushing the Jedi tunic
aside in his quest to taste bare flesh. Qui-Gon moaned softly
and his arms came without volition around Obi-Wan's body as he
pulled his lover closer to him and blindly met the searching
mouth with his own.
They had kissed the first night - long, slow, sensual kisses
that were immediately addictive for both. Obi-Wan's sweet mouth
had been the subject of many a fantasy for Qui-Gon Jinn, and to
have the leisure to explore it at will had been almost more
than his overheated body could take. He was already hard and
aching and he'd had Obi-Wan in his arms for only a few moments.
Qui-Gon could feel Obi-Wan's arousal as the younger man pressed
up against him, but it was the open mouth and questing tongue
under his own that was making him throb with need.
Obi-Wan was pulling Qui-Gon back with him towards the bed when
it happened. Obi-Wan had sat back on the bed and was reaching
up to help his Master disrobe when Qui-Gon was assaulted with
the memory of the night he had taken Obi-Wan in anger. As he
glanced down at his Padawan, the images got confused and there
was Obi-Wan, kneeling before him, sobbing.
Qui-Gon pulled back with a gasp of shock at the mental
pictures. His shock was quickly followed by despair at the
flash of hurt that passed so quickly over Obi-Wan's features at
his apparent rejection. He sank to his knees in front of his
Padawan, taking Obi-Wan's hands in his own and kissing them.
His eyes were bright with unshed tears as he looked his Padawan
in the face.
"I'm sorry, Obi-Wan. I'm so sorry."
"No, Master." Obi-Wan was quick to admit his own culpability.
"It was my fault, too. I couldn't trust you because I spent so
many years convincing myself that you didn't want me."
Obi-Wan told his Master about the tape Yoda had sent, and what
he had discovered about himself. Qui-Gon remained kneeling at
his feet, but was close enough for Obi-Wan to touch and kiss as
he told his story.
"You've always been there for me," Obi-Wan ended. "You've
always trusted *me* and been proud of me, but I was too afraid.
I had to keep that core of mistrust deep within me. I made sure
I would assume the worst always - that way it wouldn't hurt so
much if you *did* reject me. I was wrong, Qui-Gon. On Naboo,
when you told me about Anakin …"
Obi-Wan couldn't continue. Even the memory of that final and
total rejection was devastating. Qui-Gon closed his eyes in
shame.
"Oh, Obi-Wan, I have failed you. In all the years since you
became my Padawan I *have* loved you and been proud of you. I
would trust you with my life in an instant. But I destroyed
what we had that night on Dantooine. How could I ever ask for
your forgiveness when I can't forgive myself?"
Obi-Wan thought for a long moment before leaning over to kiss
Qui-Gon softly.
"I spent a long time meditating after I watched that recorded
message, Master. I think the answer is that we needed to go
through this."
Qui-Gon frowned, struggling to comprehend.
Obi-Wan smiled softly at the rarely seen expression. It was so
different now. Master, lover, life-mate. He loved this man.
"Even if I hadn't overheard Master Windu talking with you that
morning, something like that was bound to happen sooner or
later. I couldn't trust you enough to believe that you truly
loved me. That doubt would have eventually destroyed our
relationship anyway. I think the Force lead us through our own
version of the Trial of Fire, Master. We nearly failed it, but
the Force has brought us together - stronger than we could have
been before."
"The Force and Master Yoda, perhaps," Qui-Gon said dryly.
Obi-Wan grinned at the comment.
"What does it matter? We're here now."
Qui-Gon smiled at the confidence in Obi-Wan's voice. This was
so unlike his Padawan - to take charge like this. Over the
years Qui-Gon had orchestrated the necessary changes in their
relationship and Obi-Wan had followed along dutifully. It felt
right to have Obi-Wan take control now.
There was just one more thing before Qui-Gon Jinn could give
way to the pull of Obi-Wan's allure. He ached with need but he
had to have this first.
"Forgive me, Obi-Wan?" Qui-Gon whispered, mute plea in his
eyes.
Obi-Wan looked deep into the blue depths, wondering how he had
ever imagined Qui-Gon's eyes could be cold. They burned for
this. They burned for him.
He smiled.
"Always, my love." There lips met and there was no more
conversation that night.
It was late when Obi-Wan and Qui-Gon finally made it to
breakfast the following day, and there was an air of sleepy
sexual gratification about both of them. Both Daen and Valerin
raised an eyebrow enquiringly as the two sat down without
speaking and began what looked to be a fairly erotic mental
conversation.
Arista had passed a very average night. Obi-Wan's eventual
triumph had angered her, but she felt she could be big enough
to ignore it. Particularly when her own future was looking so
rosy.
Daen and Valerin had disappeared into their quarters not long
after Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan had left the room, but Arista wasn't
particularly worried. Let Daen have his fun with Valerin. Their
relationship certainly wasn't going anywhere and it would be
fun to finally have something to taunt Valerin about. She
couldn't wait to see the look on his face when he found out she
was going to be partnered with Daen permanently.
She had lied the night before to Obi-Wan and Valerin, but
really, it was so obvious that the Council had finally
recognised her talents that the lie was perfectly harmless. Her
own Master had been making noises about Arista being given
another assignment, and for a short while, Arista had actually
thought her Master meant the AgriCorps. Stupid woman. But when
Arista had heard Master Yoda agreeing with Qui-Gon about
partnering Daen permanently she had practically hugged herself
with pleasure.
It would have been good to spill the beans last night, but she
wanted to toy with Valerin a little while longer. And when she
was installed as Daen's permanent partner, she would have a lot
more authority than she did now. The Council would be reading
*her* reports and it would be simplicity itself to put some
very disparaging comments in about Obi-Wan's performance. She
couldn't wait.
Qui-Gon seemed to finish his mental communication with Obi-Wan,
and turned to the group sitting at the table.
"I spoke with Master Yoda last evening. Apparently the Council
investigators managed to discover the identity of the party
financing the pirates. The Hutts of Ogitrev, apparently. With
the pirates on the planet arrested, that puts the mission to
rest finally. And Master Yoda has another mission for you,
Daen."
Daen raised an eyebrow.
"What about you and Obi-Wan?"
Qui-Gon smiled at his lover, then looked over at Daen.
"We have been ordered to take a three month leave of absence.
We'll spend some time on my home planet, and on Obi-Wan's. We
have a lot of ground to catch up on if Obi-Wan is to take his
trials when we return from leave."
Daen looked over at Obi-Wan.
"Congratulations. And as you're soul-bonded, the Council will
have to partner you permanently."
"The Council doesn't know we plan to soul-bond. We'll have to
tell them, Master," Obi-Wan replied in all innocence.
Qui-Gon grinned at Daen.
"Ah … we'll talk about that later, Padawan. In the
meantime, there's another permanent partnership the Council
have approved. The Council have decided you need a full-time
baby-sitter, Daen. They put the seal on their decision last
night."
Daen looked at Qui-Gon for a long moment, then grinned. Arista
smirked triumphantly at Valerin, enjoying immensely the look of
devastation on his face. Obi-Wan was busy enjoying his Master's
gaze on him and didn't notice what was going on around the rest
of the table.
Daen did, though.
He rose from his chair to leave, paused at the door and turned
to look back at the group at the table. Valerin had his head
down, and was staring at the table with a bitter twist to his
mouth. He glanced up in surprise when Daen spoke.
"Get a move on, Val. We have things to organise if we're to be
ready for that mission the Council have for us."
The young pilot stared at Daen open-mouthed.
"Me?"
Daen grinned.
"Yes, you. Although I think it would be wise for me to state at
the outset that *I* am the one in charge of this partnership."
Valerin quirked an eyebrow in a familiar cheeky expression as
he, too, rose from the table to join Daen at the door.
"In your dreams, Daen."
Valerin got his ass smacked for his impudence as he passed Daen
in the doorway. Obi-Wan and Qui-Gon listened as the two walked
down the hallway.
"Don't be cheeky, Val."
"Yes, Master."
Obi-Wan chuckled, then laughed out loud as he met Qui-Gon's
laughing eyes. Completely forgetting the presence of Arista at
the table, he got up from his chair and straddled Qui-Gon's,
leaning in to steal a kiss.
"I love you, Qui-Gon Jinn."
Qui-Gon allowed the kiss, even going so far as to return it
with a measure of enthusiasm. An annoyed exclamation
interrupted the tender scene.
"Excuse me? Am I suddenly invisible?" Arista was steamed. "If
you think I'm going to put up with the two of you---." her
voice trailed off as she met the cold gaze of Jedi Master
Qui-Gon Jinn.
"I doubt you will have the time to allow petty concerns to
disrupt your concentration, Padawan G'effen. Your report on the
mining situation on Hoth was inadequate, to say the least. You
would do well to research similar disputes, starting with
Dnoagn, Emilson V and Sh'rahste. Compare the situations in
each, then redo your report in entirety. I'm sure if you ask
nicely, Obi-Wan will look over your report before you give it
to me."
Arista gaped unattractively. Redo the entire report? Ask
*Obi-Wan* to check her work? Surely he couldn't be serious! The
cold, hard gaze of the Jedi Master convinced her quite quickly
that he was. Arista grabbed her data pads and stormed out of
the room.
Obi-Wan sighed as the door shut behind Arista's departing
figure.
"Thank you, Qui-Gon. I can't wait to spend a few hours in
Arista's company showing her how to write a report correctly."
His tone was dry.
Qui-Gon smiled.
"Don't be cheeky, Obi-Wan."
"Yes, Master."
The End
End of the series <sob!> Feedback greatly appreciated:
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